I Feel Like There Aren't Nearly Enough Resources For People Who Leave A High-controlling Religious Environment

i feel like there aren't nearly enough resources for people who leave a high-controlling religious environment and still want to seek God/spirituality in their own way without the toxicity of their previous religion.

most of the stuff out there is "your new life without God," "leaving God behind," etc...

people act like the natural next step from leaving a controlling religion is staunch atheism.

that might be the most common outcome, considering the trauma associated with God that such an upbringing can result in. and if that's the path you choose, that's perfectly valid. you process your trauma however you need to, as long as you're not hurting anyone.

but it's not the only possible outcome, and it doesn't work for everyone.

some people still feel the need to seek spirituality and feel as though they're not alone on a cosmic scale. (i'm one of those people.)

i feel like people fail to acknowledge this sometimes.

Out of the depths I cry to you, Lord; Lord, hear my voice. Let your ears be attentive to my cry for mercy.

Psalm 130:1-2

Commission

From a recent conversation with my mother, I got this idea from her into my own wording while talking about labels regarding spiritual beliefs.

« In spirituality, we can borrow from the LGBT community the idea that we can define ourselves not from the expectations of others nor the pressure to ultimately knowing ourselves in a given time, but a journey in which we remember that labels were never the most important thing. Even in the queer community, there exists the words and descriptions for people who feel that none of the current labels describe them, and they can exist freely without defining themselves through them.

» The LGBTQIA+ means "the existent" (the letters) and "the more" (the plus), all and everything it is, in which people recognize the limitation of language, words and labels. To use labels means navigating ourselves, since what comes most is that the interpretation of ourselves can change… and we ourselves can change, feel that a label doesn't suit us anymore, and that is completely normal and ok.

» In relation to this, of your worries as a teenager in a world were things can feel above you, living with that intellectual frustration, letting that pressure in the youthful mind of wanting to know and control everything can be hard. But in there is the Good News which means that in confusion there will come light and something greater, recognizing that it's reaching beyond common perceptions of the Good and the Right, but the Wholeness in the Beauty of our existence, beyond morality, beyond any notions of free will and devoutness, but of progress, of keeping going and just live and be.»

I am a queer christian, so the whole time I was "ermm… ofc mom, I understand that :)" however I'm incredibly glad she has gotten to the point of understanding that basic aspect of the queer community that is often so misunderstood, something that it was going to prove to be really hard to explain that to her myself, which makes me think that she's fond of gay people now (in reference to the homophobic dog meme, which she was once).

Perhaps she's been doing all of that for me, perhaps it's also for her close queer family members, I don't know, but it's a beautiful and relieving sight; knowing how hard it has been for me to reconcile my identity this has been transmitting into my mom in one way or another, God bless us 🤍🙏

1 corinthians 13:4-8

god is love