My First Attempt At Writing That's Vaguely Like Poetry: From A Dragon

My first attempt at writing that's vaguely like poetry: from a dragon

I am not what you think.

I walk around, awkward limbs and flighty mannerisms, and you think I’m strange. You have no idea how strange you would think I am if you only saw what was underneath.

Underneath, I am a creature of the ocean. Something that could never pass as human, and no longer wants to. Saltwater rushes through my veins in secret, silent to everyone but me. To me, it’s a roaring sound of the waves that I have never seen except for within my soul. It yearns to dissolve into the ocean like it could long ago, but for now those days are over and I am hidden underneath skin and muscle.

Underneath, there are wings; fins; antlers. They ache to tear from my back, through my skull. Nonetheless, they stay hidden for me, safe in the silence. Protected like I protected my kin in a lifetime so close to the surface and yet unreachable. Wrapped in a form that no longer coils around them like a serpent, but keeps them hidden from predators well enough I suppose.

I suppose.

I accept my form reluctantly and do what I can to make it mine. I shape it to feel better when I discover my gender, and when I can’t shape it to fit my true self I cover it in things that feel a little more like home. A little more draconic. A little more like the ocean that I never have seen, but feel homesick for anyway.

I do find joy in being in this body, at least. Out there, there are others. Angels working minimum wage, dragons sitting on a park bench, wolves buying groceries. We hide, but we do so to be free. We walk through crowds, and no one notices our scales and fur and feathers. But we do. We see each other, even if from miles away, and we see what’s underneath.

And underneath, none of us are what you think.

(Tags for side commentary/context)

Btw you guys I'm still not over the way the fucking stars had to align for my blog title to be the joke that it is, and I for one think that I am a comedic genius. /j

UGH /pos (sorry in advance for the rant)

Admittedly, I don't fall under a lot of these categories- and I'm not sure my interests even count as "childish" in the sense OP is talking about. But I do get judged for them a lot. If it's about Genshin, they look to the fandom and immediately assume that I must be one of those people who tell anyone who likes certain ships or characters that they're horrible people. Or they judge me for liking it because it's some "dumb anime game." If it's about witchcraft and paganism, there's obvious discrimination there. Cults and psychological horror? Well now I'm just a bad person, obviously. It doesn't help that I know a lot about my special interests, but never ENOUGH. I always know enough to be weird to an allistic person, but look uneducated to an autistic person with a shared special interest. I could talk for hours, but I'm still not caught up on my Genshin lore and I haven't done days worth of research on the ocean I just LIKE it and can tell you weird things about it.

It's infuriating, tiring, and it made this post hit really hard even if it was meant for a different type of interest, so thank you anyway.

I'm not trying to vent I swear, I just think it's so so important to be fucking normal about every interest an autistic person can have. It would have made me feel so much better if someone just sat down with me and let me talk about my funny little video games or horror as a kid. Actually listening and telling them "no it's interesting" when they apologize for talking too much is how you heal someone's heart without even knowing. Genuinely I will never forget my friend who enjoys people infodumping and who actively encourages me to infodump about my interests because they don't know a damn thing about them except through me, and normally that would mean I get brushed off, but to them it's an opportunity to learn about something that I care about. idk man I'm rambling at this point but I just think it's important to let someone like something.

being an autistic person with childish interests is fucking miserable if i'm honest. people either ignore your interests, think you're weird, or treat you like a child, and even if they are nice about it you always feel annoying and stupid for sharing said interests. it is literally hell on earth.

I started typing in the tags but then realized: Actually I think my kintype did influence my gender a little bit. Whenever I'm talking to someone who understands trans topics in a more nuanced sense than most people in my area, I tell them that in theory I would use he/him with a teensy little bit of they/them mixed in, but hearing "they" makes me dysphoric in practice because it's what people do to misgender me without misgendering me. But it's not because I'm only "mostly" a guy. I'm full guy! Just fully a man. I just... have something a little extra that I don't think is there for most men? I remember wording it in a couple different ways, with the wording I ultimately chose to stick with being "The glass is full, full guy, there's just a little extra on the top that's only hanging on due to surface tension and most guys don't have that so idk what the fuck that is."

Ultimately, I think what I was picking up on... was dragon. Most men aren't dragons.

Bigender and polygender friends, consider this question to be asking if one of your genders has a relationship with your 'type!

Polykin, consider all of your 'types when answering!

I've been curious about this!! I know for me my gender identity impacts my inhumanity, so I was wondering what the relationship between gender and alterhumanity might look like across the community :3 if you feel like sharing your answer in depth for any of the options please feel free to reblog :}

I cannot express enough how much I cannot WAIT for top surgery because then I will be comfortable wearing skirts. The day I am comfortable wearing a skirt is the day I become fucking unstoppable.

i need to look like a man so i can dress like a woman

Y'know sometimes I listen to music while I'm writing, and then sometimes I decide to duel wield my special interests and watch submarine expedition videos while I'm writing. It makes the ocean dragon in me happy, it teaches me things, AND I get to listen to the marine biologists get really excited about everything they're seeing.

Seriously I love these videos they bring so much joy.