Sometimes They Just Want To Watch The World Burn.

sometimes they just want to watch the world burn.

i've ranted about this before but

Chongyun is not emotionless. Chongyun has a lot of feelings and wears his heart on his sleeve. He feels all the emotions: anger, annoyance, sadness, joy, and so much more. He feels them, he expresses them.

I think a lot of people (reddit, mostly from what I've seen) mistake Chongyun's suppression to mean that he's basically robotic in nature. I agree that he has to keep himself in check in order to manage his yang energy, but that doesn't mean Chongyun's a blank slate.

Chongyun is a ball of energy just waiting to explode. They have so much personality brimming below the surface, and I try to capture more than that in my portrayal. Chongyun is very very passive aggressive when he's trying to keep his anger in check. He makes his disdain very very obvious.

Chongyun is also very happy a lot of times. He shows his joy by wearing large smiles that make his eyes sparkle. He loves spending time with people and he loves sharing, he loves being able to share that bond where he can laugh with someone, or even crack jokes.

Chongyun also gets scared. Scared, nervous, anxious, all the emotions. You can hear them in his voice, see it all in his actions. Just because he's not doing grand emotional acts doesn't mean he's not expressing himself.

Chongyun is so expressive and I do not understand how people miss that.

Whether it's my portrayal or the game portrayal, Chongyun is very clearly your basic average guy with basic average emotions. Calling him emotionless because of his yang energy is wrong.

i just want to go into a lil bit of yun’s dark side here cause that headcanon i just posted kinda made me sad but.

chongyun has blood on their hands. vangquishing evil isn’t just limited to the abyss or hilichurls or ghosts, but the clan has and will go after people who steal from them or people who threaten those they worship.

chongyun especially can be ruthless. he’s one of the few members of his clan that actually has a vision, the majority of them don’t, so chongyun is very much inclined to put a swift end to anyone who threatens/hurts his family.

it doesn’t require them to go into their yang state, either, because in those moments, chongyun is very focused and driven to protect, so any thoughts he’d have normally are gone. they don’t regret any of it either, always looking back and saying it was for the good of their people/clan.

not very many people in liyue or people who know chongyun know this about him, and it’s not even something he’d talk about with his inner circle of friends. this is something kept only between those who’ve witnessed him in action, so mostly the clan, and probably xiao. but chongyun has killed people, and will kill people in the future. zero regrets.

actually I just had a thought because I'm replaying the story on an alt account.

People in Liyue say at the beginning that the adepti are seen as a myth, that no one's actually seen them. Which doesn't make any sense, because Chongyun + clan actively works alongside Xiao and have been for centuries.

Does this mean that Chongyun themself is a secret keeper? That they knew all along of how sacred Jueyun Karst is because of the adepti? That the adepti never left?

I always headcanoned that the clan holds documents/armor/weapons/etc from Khaenri'ah, but does this mean that they could also hold documents and whatnot from the fallen yaksha themselves if this is a case?

If the clan knew about the adepti from the beginning, then what else do they know?

if you'd like to know where kami was in all this mess, he went and gave himself a lip piercing.

ren's confession almost passes by unacknowledged. kami doesn't want to discuss the finer intricacies of ren's love life. in part, because kami is still JEALOUS that ren can find love, and also part because the idea that ren can befriend and even marry one of the descendants of the raiden gokaden is still so, so laughable to kaminari. it stands to reason he'd gloss right over this.

except―

tipping his kasa back, kami GLARES at ren with the most bombastic side eye. there is nothing funny about what ren's told him, but this entire confession is even more laughable than the idea that ren is dating his supposed enemy.

"ren." kami's voice comes out far more curt than he'd like. but then again, it's not sharp enough, either. "you are going to marry this man," kami continues. he shifts his body, angling it more toward his brother. "you instinctively correct me on what your titles to each other are. you are dedicating yourself to him in the most mundane, pointless ceremony to ever exist. and yet, you haven't told him anything about yourself?"

kami's TRYING to place himself in ren's shoes. he's trying to understand where ren's coming from. if kami had such a loyal partner as kaedahara, certainly he'd feel comfortable enough to share the darkest parts of his past, to ensure his partner would still love him.

isn't that how it's supposed to be?

kami ISN'T in ren's shoes. though they share incredibly similar experiences, and may have even walked in the same footsteps, their opinions and outlooks on life are still entirely separate from each other. case in point: ren and kaedahara being engaged.

"are you going to lie by omission this entire time?" kami continues. "forget even the fatui. does he even KNOW you're the one who kickstarted his clan's downfall?" he puts a hand to his mouth, trying to stifle the sudden onslaught of laughter, but this is way too fucking rich. this isn't funny. ren isn't funny. but okay― this is a little funny.

"i can't believe you," kami laughs. "i can't wait to see the look on his face when―, and yes, i'm expecting you to actually tell him, ―he learns the truth about you."

kami bows his head, biting on a finger to try and control himself. he can't just keep laughing at ren, but sometimes kami wonders how much of an idiot he really can be.

"―and i thought i was the reckless one."

the  anger  earns  a  blink  —  though  ren  isn't  so  ignorant  as  to  assume  it's  directed  at  HIMSELF.  the  situation  they've  found  themselves  in  goes  beyond  merely  messy.  it's  a  veritable  minefield  with  no  end  in  sight  where  each  step  carries  the  risk  of  setting  off  yet  another  explosive  —  vitriolic  feelings,  some  echo  of  past  trauma,  a  memory  better  left  buried.  instead  of  adding  more  fuel  to  those  white-hot  sparks  of  anger,  the  wanderer  decides  to  observe  in  silence.  chin  propped  up  on  that  same  fist  that  once  feigned  snatching  up  the  lights  of  the  city  below,  eyes  sharp  and  unapologetically  attuned  to  every  detail.

❝  she  wouldn't. ❞   he  only  speaks  up  when  kaminari  decides  to  shift  the  SUBJECT.   ❝  ...  and  frankly,  i  would  prefer  not  to  have  that  conversation  with  her  —  even  if  she's  already  well  aware  of  the  details. ❞  lord  kusanali's  wisdom  is  invaluable,  but  her  guidance  is  too  GENTLE.  ren's  mind  craves  an  answer  —  direct  and  uncompromising.  he  cannot  handle  a  vague  push  meant  to  gently  nudge  him  towards  his  own  conclusions.  his  head  is  far  too  muddled  to  produce  anything  of  value,  emotions  clouding  his  judgement.  it's  precisely  for  that  reason  why  he's  decided  to  consult  KAMINARI  about  this  —  knowing  full  well  that  his  twin  is  both  similarly  straightforward  and  already  aware  of  the  ugly  feelings  HAUNTING  him.  it's  a  shame  he  didn't  take  the  time  to  consider  that  might  lend  itself  to  the  same  hindrances.

❝  ... ❞  take  the  plunge,  huh?  it's  certainly  an  idea.  perhaps  it's  the  only  option  they  truly  have.  ❝  he's  my  fiancé. ❞  ren  quickly  corrects  —  words  spoken  on  REFLEX  rather  than  conscious  thought.  ❝  ...  not  my  boyfriend. ❞  honestly,  the  wanderer  doesn't  particularly  care  much  for  the  difference  —  and  he  doesn't  care  much  for  the  concept  of  marriage  in  general.  still,  it's  important  to  KAZUHA.  ❝  i  doubt  we  have  the  funds  to  pay  for  a  personal  trip  to  inazuma ...  but  if  they  happen  to  already  be  heading  in  that  direction,  there's  a  chance  we  could  tag  along. ❞  although,  even  thinking  about  it  has  discomfort  squirming  in  the  pit  of  his  nonexistent  stomach.  this  is  very  rapidly  beginning  to  feel  a  bit  too  REAL.  ❝  to  be  honest,  i'm  not  sure  how  deeply  i  want  kazuha  to  be  involved.  he's  already  has  his  own  experiences  involving  my  mother,  and  i  can't  imagine  they're  PLEASANT ...  it  would  be  SELFISH  to  involve  him  in  my  issues  on  top  of  that,  wouldn't  it? ❞  yes,  they  may  be  in  a  relationship  —  and  yes,  he  knows  by  definition  that  means  they  should  be  around  to  support  one  another...  but  is  it  so  wrong  to  want  to  PROTECT  HIM  from  discomfort  that  would  otherwise  be  completely  avoidable?

...  perhaps.  ren  knows  he  has  a  tendency  to  keep  SECRETS.  (  more  than  he  should.  )

case  and  point,  ❝  he  still  doesn't  know  about  the  fatui. ❞