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the drawer where I keep my barbed wire

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Low Level/continuous Pain Tips For Writing

Low level/continuous pain tips for writing

Want to avoid the action movie effect and make your character’s injuries have realistic lasting impacts? Have a sick character you’re using as hurt/comfort fodder? Everyone has tips for how to write Dramatic Intense Agony, but the smaller human details of lasting or low-level discomfort are rarely written in. Here are a few pain mannerisms I like to use as reference:

General

Continuously gritted teeth (may cause headaches or additional jaw pain over time)

Irritability, increased sensitivity to lights, sounds, etc

Repetitive movements (fidgeting, unable to sit still, slight rocking or other habitual movement to self-soothe)

Soft groaning or whimpering, when pain increases or when others aren’t around

Heavier breathing, panting, may be deeper or shallower than normal

Moving less quickly, resistant to unnecessary movement

Itching in the case of healing wounds

Subconsciously hunching around the pain (eg. slumped shoulders or bad posture for gut pain)

Using a hand to steady themself when walking past walls, counters, etc (also applies to illness)

Narration-wise: may not notice the pain was there until it’s gone because they got so used to it, or may not realize how bad it was until it gets better

May stop mentioning it outright to other people unless they specifically ask or the pain increases

Limb pain

Subtly leaning on surfaces whenever possible to take weight off foot/leg pain

Rubbing sore spots while thinking or resting

Wincing and switching to using other limb frequently (new/forgettable pain) or developed habit of using non dominant limb for tasks (constant/long term pain)

Propping leg up when sitting to reduce inflammation

Holding arm closer to body/moving it less

Moving differently to avoid bending joints (eg. bending at the waist instead of the knees to pick something up)

Nausea/fever/non-pain discomfort

Many of the same things as above (groaning, leaning, differences in movement)

May avoid sudden movements or turning head for nausea

Urge to press up against cold surfaces for fever

Glazed eyes, fixed stare, may take longer to process words or get their attention

Shivering, shaking, loss of fine motor control

If you have any more details that you personally use to bring characters to life in these situations, I’d love to hear them! I’m always looking for ways to make my guys suffer more write people with more realism :)

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More Posts from Ostensiblywhump

11 months ago

WRITING ADVICE!!!

"Pain is Plain."

Let's face it; saying " it was very painful," falls just a little flat. You want something that will empower your writing, enrichen it. Using words that vividly describe a situation or feeling will help your readers "visualize" the scene. It will make them wonder " How is the main character going to survive this?" Or, if the hero is inflicting rightful pain on the antagonist, it will cause them to cheer and anticipate what their favorite character will do next. But none of this will work if you describe a deadly wound as "It really hurt." Here are some alternate words for "painful."

 

Excruciating

Seering

Stabbing

Ripping

Blood-curling

Paralyzing

Unimaginable

Writhing

Twisting

Shot

Shredding

Tearing

Agonizing

Indescribable

Intolerable

Harrowing

Torturing

Torturous

Aching

Cramping

Dull aching

Burning

Cold sensation

Electric shock

Nagging

Intense

Pins and needles

Sharp

Spasms

Splitting

Tender

Throbbing

Tingling

Tiring

Exhausting

Acute

Burning

Chapped

Nauseating

MILD PAIN: PAIN YOUR CHARACTER NOTICES BUT IT DOESN'T DISTRACT THEM.

Pinch

Sting

Smart

Stiffness

MODERATE PAIN: PAIN THAT DISTRACTS BUT DOESN'T TRULY STOP YOUR CHARACTER.

Ache

Throb

Distress

Flare

SEVERE PAIN: PAIN YOUR CHARACTER CAN'T IGNORE.

Agony

Anguish

Suffering

Thoes

Torment

Stabbing

OBLITERATING: KIND OF PAIN THAT PROHIBITS ANYTHING BUT BEING IN PAIN. (AND DOING ANYTHING TO ALLEVIATE IT.)

Ripping

Tearing

Writhing

Got other ideas or something you'd like to ask me? Go right ahead! I'd Love to hear from you!


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11 months ago

words to use in whump scenes (other than agony)

Blunt force

Ache

Throb

Dull

Pulse

Clench

Gasp

Crack

Beat

Slam

Crunch

Numb

Stabbing

Slice

Burn

Fire

Tear

Twist

Pry

Rip

Recoil

Cradle

Ooze

Pour

Gush

Shudder

Shaky

Gunshot

Crack

Pulse

Burrow

Blinding

Dull

Throb

Stretch

Spread

Cramp

Coil

Numb

Ache

Whipping

Slice

Crack

Tear

Rip

White-hot

Numb

Shock

Burn

Tazing

Shock

Burn

Fire

Jolt

Cramp

Paralyze

Tremble

Gasp

Douse

Stutter

Blinding

Broken/dislocated bones

Crunch

Crack

Slide

Tense

Freeze

Numb

Shock

Pull/push

Throb

Pulse

Spike


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11 months ago

behavior modification master list

WRU has hired renowned behaviorist Dr. Ivan Peters to refine their training protocol for Romantic acquisitions. When Jack Kenyon–the brilliant young partner of one of Ivan’s med school rivals–applies to be Dr. Peters’ research assistant, he has no idea what he’s signing on for. 

Please see individual chapters for detailed and specific content warnings. This story will contain noncon elements [*]; proceed with caution!

behavior modification pre-timeline content: organized in rough chronological order

past snippet: jack's fourteenth birthday

-/-/-

part one: jack and ivan at dinner

part two: jack and joe, before captivity

part three: jack's abduction

part four: ivan welcomes to jack to captivity

part five: worries for joe, bath time for jack

part six: jack's intake interview (part one)

part seven: jack's intake interview (part two)

part eight: past, present, and future

part nine: breakfast time

part ten: jack learns his positions

part eleven: jack's consequences*

part twelve: ivan's apology

part thirteen: jack's last chance to feel*

part fourteen: joe and his mother

part fifteen: prelude to punishment

part sixteen: jack's first treatment*

part seventeen: deprivation

part eighteen: jack loses joe

part nineteen: case notes*

part twenty: yes, sir*

drabble: statue*

drabble: bravo*

drabble: good boy, sweet boy*

-/-/-

behavior modification post-rescue content: organized in rough chronological order

first night home: joe gives jack a bath

first night home: from joe's pov

first night home: dinner and bedtime

drabble: zombie

trouble sleeping: grounding

just after: small decisions

drabble: joe sees ivan's videos

continuation of above: cut

drabble: he needs me

early recovery: bittersweet

starting over: undone

drabble: press conference blues

drabble: jack trusts joe

first time after: lightning glass

future snippet: rest now

drabble: jack's hair

drabble: it's over

future snippet: eros

baby drabble: christmas tree

baby drabble: corduroy bear

years later, with their child: lucky

kid-related drabble: lemonade stand

teenaged hallie miniseries: like father, like daughter

teenaged hallie miniseries: kids will be kids

teenaged hallie miniseries: daddy's little girl *

teenaged hallie miniseries: daddy and chief

-/-/-

role reversal alternate universe:

part one: sweetheart

part two: open *

part three: filled*

part four: initiation*

part five: better*

post-rescue drabble: mama

post-rescue drabble: the blanket is warm

post-rescue drabble: hidden shame

post-rescue drabble: nightmares

-/-/-

role reversal alternate universe on steroids:

part x: a real white knight


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11 months ago

Smells are WAY Underused in Whump

The scent associated with an experience, good or bad, is a POWERFUL thing for humans, and a great tool for whump.

Smells making kidnapped (and already malnourished) character nauseous

(Remember, blood and badly burnt skin have distinct smells to them, it can really add to the impact if they’re mentioned)

A positive smell being somehow tied to the ordeal, and almost being ruined for Whumpee.

Victims of medical whump being sent into a panic at the smell of latex or strong cleaning supplies

Victims of mechanical whump (car related, saw traps, what have you) despising the smell of gasoline.

On the lighter side, Whumpee using the smell of Caretaker’s cologne/perfume to remind themselves they’re safe.

Please add if you want, because this is an untapped wealth.


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11 months ago

Y'know what! Fira has inspired me so I'm gonna talk about my second-favorite Dragon Slayer headcanon, and it goes as such:

The more stress a Dragon Slayer's body goes through, the more it dragonizes. This is a really dry way to say that I think injuries a Dragon Slayer gets will scar over with scales, and also that mental stress can have consequences that are…interesting, to say the least, from a writer's perspective.

Let me bring in my favorite punching bag, Gajeel. In my headcanon appearance for him, the scars on his right arm are replaced by patches of iron scales—rusting iron scales, depending on how old those scars are, because I think rust would be really cool and mimic how human scars fade from age, and ruddy rust blends better with human skintones than silvery iron. But I also really like the idea of him having iron spines all the way down his back, for the aesthetic. Which could have the Watsonian explanation of him potentially being so distrusting of anybody to guard him in the past, that his magic responded to his paranoia and trauma by protecting his spine from a literal backstabber. Two headcanons all wrapped up in a neat 'what if dragonization responded to human fragility by dragonizing it away' bow! :D


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fairy tail gajeel redfox dragon slayers I'm still so freaking proud of all the headcanons we lobbed at each other in this post. just a constant creative back and forth plus it's whump! it counts! and now I'm wondering what specific traumas could lead to the other dragon slayers dragonizing just natsu's sheer eagerness for throwing himself into fights he can't win will give him a BUNCH of scales just to keep himself in one piec gives me the idea that his knuckles are positively crusted with scales because he has such a punch-happy fighting style oh! his scales would be red! so maybe he would look like he's constantly bleeding or something! I am far too excited by this prospect lol and sting! sting is super young for a guild master and sabertooth prob isn't doing so hot with losing their undefeatable reputation so he might get targeted a lot and rogue won't always be there to help him or maybe earlier for both twin dragons when they're younger and still proving themselves to jiemma oh HELL i just thought of something heartbreaking for wendy most animals don't cry like we do right? not for emotional release. just illness or if they get something in them im pretty sure birds and lizards aren't capable of crying like humans wendy has been abandoned by a LOT of her caretakers. maybe they had good reasons but at the end of the day it was abandonment grandeeney mystogan cait shelter—all of them left and in the edolas arc there was a scary moment where fairy tail seemed to be taken from her too (when the guild hall warps out of existence so i think wendy would have a lot of issues around abandonment and would get really stressed about her loved ones leaving her and maybe her magic would try to protect her by taking away her body's reactions to that stress if you're not reacting then it's not happening! you're not being hurt by it at all! right? so basically I think her magic would dragonize away her human ability to cry from emotional stress which. wow. I kinda like this ingenuity but I kinda hate what it's led to wendy marvell