420 FOLLOWERS~ - Albino Version

420 FOLLOWERS~ - Albino Version

Albino version of this!

@drinking-tea-and-be-obsessed @olivia-the-weirdo @mechformers @rsclopez @totesnothere04 @milknhonies

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i met u yesterday n ily with all my heart now, thanks for giving me serotonin xo 😻💗😽

TYSVM YOU PRECIOUS BEAN <3

What Do I Tell My Friends Family? Pt. 4

word count: 8212

Pairing: Recom! Miles! Quaritch x Female! Sully! Na'vi! Reader Tags/Warnings: slight violence, swearing, fluff, reunion, so much crying

Author's Note: Man. Partway through writing this, I realized it was gonna surpass 10k, so had to break it up into more parts lmao. No smut in this chapter folks, sorry! Next chapter I promise bb xo

<previous chapter> | 4 | <next chapter>

You could lay there forever, you think. Tightly pressed into your mate’s side, bonded. Body aching from love making. But such bliss cannot last, not while you’re still a prisoner.

Quaritch feels your unease through the bond. He knows you’re right. He looks to the holo-clock on his bedside. It’s the early hours of the morning, still have a few hours before sunrise. He starts rubbing slow soothing patterns on your back. You hum softly.

He thinks about what’s going to happen to you in the morning. The General said she wanted you ready in a few days, get you back in that machine. He has no doubt in his mind that she’d be willing to push you to the brink of death again. He’s grateful the machine broke when it did. He swears he heard Her voice when it did. Did She intervene? If so, he resolves to thank Her properly when he can.

First and foremost; he needs a plan to get you the fuck outta here. Now with his memories fully back in place, any allegiance he once had to this place, to the RDA, has gone straight out the window. He spent a lot of his afterlife in quiet contemplation. It was a painful thing, to come face to face with one’s own past. To truly delve into the things he did. The guilt, regret and sorrow was almost overwhelming. But he got through it. And after all the years he spent seeing you, then those months spent together intimately, you were the only thing he cared about now. Well, besides his son, but he cared for the boy in a different way.

Sweet Spider. He wondered if the kid would ever forgive him. No doubt everything that has happened to you will come to light. He wonders how much you’ll actually tell him. You feel his uncertainty through the bond.

“Miles?”

He sits up suddenly, a renewed sense of determination floods your senses coming straight from him.

“I gotta get you the fuck outta here.” You stare wide-eyed at him, but smile when you see the sternness of his expression as he looks to you.

“Wait here.” He orders, unlinking your queues. He rushes to dress himself in his black tank top and camo pants. He comes back to the bed and kisses you hard; leaving you breathless.

“I’ll be back.”

---

And so you wait.

Quietly you sit in that bed, in the dark. You decide it’d be best if you got dressed yourself. You rummage through his clothes till you find a large black t-shirt you like the smell of; his scent is heavily woven through the fabric. The shirt sits just above your hips; no doubt it would look comically big were it not for your proportions. Least it is somewhat loose. You’re thankful then, that his pants sit comfortably on you thanks to your wide hips.

You sit yourself back on the bed once satisfied with your attire. You’re anxious now, nervously playing with your loose hair. How were the two of you going to pull this off? Even if it was the early hours of morning, surely not everyone in the base was asleep? And what of Spider? Could the 3 of you really escape so easily?

You’re not sure how much time passes when the door suddenly opens, startling you. You’re taken aback by the sight before you.

In walks Quaritch, flanked by 3 other recoms, and pushing through their legs, is your beloved brother.

You gasp.

It feels far too long since you saw him.

“SPIDER!!!” You yell, unintentionally, but the joy and relief of seeing him alive and unharmed overwhelms you. Quaritch luckily had closed the door before your outburst.

“[Y/N]!!! You’re okay!” He yells and runs to you. You drop to you knees and grab him in your arms. He wraps his arms around your neck and hugs you tightly. You feel as though you could weep.

He pulls back, grabbing your face in his little lands, turning you side to side. His face contorted with worry. He’s inspecting you, as if to make sure you are real, are unharmed.

“What did they do to you? Did these assholes hurt you? Did…he hurt you?” You see Quaritch flinch in your peripheral. Of course. Spider doesn’t know he has all his memories back. And with that, he is fluent in Na’vi; something you spent months teaching him when the two of you weren’t in the throes of passion.

You place a kiss on Spider’s forehead.

“I’m okay now. I’ll explain everything once we’re safe and out of here. Unless…?” You trail off as you look to the others in the room. Two men and one woman.

“[Y/N], this is Lyle, Mansk, and ZDog.” He points to each one of them as he introduces them.

You greet them with the customary hand gesture. They do not reciprocate, and you do not begrudge them. They instead greet you in the human way, holding up a hand with a “hi” or a “hey”.

“Sooo…You’re the reason Colonel here’s about to go AWOL?” The bald one, Lyle, comments with a smirk.

“Wainfleet…” Quaritch growls out a warning. Lyle holds his hands up in defence.

“Hey I don’t mean nothing by it!”

ZDog and Mansk snicker at the two, you wonder if this is sort of exchange is an often occurrence. Quaritch sighs in annoyance, but he sees the slight worry in your eyes.

“You don’t gotta worry about these 3, darling. Their loyalty is to me, not the RDA. Ain’t that right ladies?”

“HOORAH!” The three of them yell with wide smiles. You breathe a sigh of relieve, hand on your heart. You get to your feet, keeping a firm hold of Spider’s hand in yours. You sure as shit weren’t letting him go again.

“So…What is the plan? Surely they wouldn’t let us just, walk out?” You ask.

“Actually…That’s precisely the plan.” You’re taken aback by this. That wasn’t really so much of a plan, as it was a complete gamble.

“I can see the gears turning in that pretty little head of yours, lemme explain.” You hear the quiet giggles of the 3 recoms, and see Lyle playfully jab his elbow into Quaritch’s side. Your mate scoffs and scowls at him, but doesn’t retaliate. He clears his throat and continues.

“I’ve left a message for the general when she eventually wakes up explaining our absence. Night Training we’ll call it. See, Spider here’s been teaching us some of your Na’vi way during the day. But your forest ain’t entirely asleep at night right? So I figured, we should be taught how to survive its dangers at night, should we ever find ourselves in such a situation. Said we’d be back by sunrise. ‘Course we ain’t plannin’ on returning. But by the time they catch on, it’d be far too late, and we’d be long gone.”

By Eywa this was such a gamble. An incredible risk. And what of transport? You’ve seen the base before, from the safety of the skies. Its size was nothing to scoff at.

“And what of transport? Are we to take one of the flying machines?” Quaritch smirks at your question.

“I got a much better idea.”

---

Dressed in full gear, the 5 recoms lead you and Spider through the base. It is far emptier than you would have expected, barely any humans awake at this hour. What few scientists you see look far too sleep deprived to even pay you any mind. You pass the room housing that awful machine and visibly recoil.

You feel Spider squeeze your hand tight, your nerves calming slightly. Your hands had been cuffed at your front, with Spider pulling you along. They had to keep up appearances, and you understood. Least the orange restraints weren’t secured too tightly like the first time.

When you pass a window you look into the room and see the machine’s interior exposed, a few humans fiddling with the contents.

‘Good that it’s fucking broken. Eywa curse that awful machine.’ You think bitterly.

---

When the cool night air first hits your face, you all but whimper. Quaritch turns to you and catches you with one hand under your arm as your knees buckle. Although there is a big smile on your face, eyes closed in bliss as you breath deep, he can’t stop the guilt that hits him. You’ve been without fresh air for so long, living off of their masks and gas canisters. Seems as though there was still more he needed to atone for with you.

You stand up straight and take one final deep breath before you look to him.

“I’m okay…I’m okay, promise.” You reassure him. He nods, and the group is on the move once more. He’s nervous, you can tell. There is a tension in his shoulders when he walks. You feel it radiating from the two at your side, and ZDog at your rear. But once again, you aren’t met with any resistance as they lead you to an open area off to the side.

You can’t help the shocked gasp when you see them.

Ikran! And four of them! Beautiful mountain ikran. Is this what they were up to when they said Spider was teaching them? You’re almost giddy with excitement. The prospect of escape growing with each passing moment. You push hard on the underlying feeling of resentment that curls deep within you; knowing that they all were enjoying with gifts of the Great Mother while you suffered deep within their base. You have to remind yourself your beloved wasn’t truly himself. You haven’t completely forgiven him; such things would take time. But getting you and Spider out of here was a nice start.

You half expected one of the human security personnel to question where you were all going at such a time, but once again, those that were patrolling, and there wasn’t a lot of them in the first place, paid you all no mind. Perhaps Quaritch and his team answered only then, to that woman; the Admiral. You shiver at the memory of her cold stare. Never had you been confronted by such indifference.

“Alright, [Y/N] with me. Spider, with Lyle.” You nod and he brings you closer to his ikran; a beautiful dark blue female with golden accents on her wings. He smiles proudly at you as he pets her neck. “This here is Cupcake.”

“Cupcake?”

“Cuz it was just so sweet of her to try and kill me,” he again smirks at you, and that raises more questions than it answers. But no matter, you’ll ask him to explain properly another time. He bond with Cupcake first, calming her and letting her understand just who you were to him. He helps you first up onto the saddle, you shuffle forward as he gets up and secures himself behind you. You grip the front of the saddle tightly. He pulls you back into his front, holding you tight with one arm around your waist. His other hand holds firm onto the reins beside your hands. With a kiss to the side of your temple, he commands his ikran to take flight.

And with that, the six of you take to the skies, uninhibited, and unbound, toward the forest.

---

Once you’re in the air and a bit away from the base, Quaritch undoes the bindings on your wrists, letting the cuffs fall to the forest. You immediately lift both hands into the air, giggling at the feeling of wind brush over your skin and through your hair.

You fly for a while, you think about 30 minutes from the base, when Quaritch calls for his squad to land in a nearby clearing. You’re impressed by his graceful landing. He hops off first, then holds a hand out to help you down, which you accept graciously.

As soon as your feet touch the ground, you hear the cry of an ikran coming in to land, and it is all to familiar. The recoms immediately have their guns drawn and pointed at the creature as it lands a few meters away. It is screaming, calls you recognise as threats. The other ikran clack their jaws together, not entirely rattled by the display. But you don’t care about that. You sprint towards him, and scream at the top of your lungs.

“PASKALIN!!!”

Quaritch calls for you, worried of course, but orders his team to stand down. The ikran bounds closer to meet you half way, its threatening yells exchanged for high pitched bellows. It places its head on your shoulder, tilting its head to bump yours, chuffing all the while.

“My sweet boy! I’m so happy you’re okay!” You gently rub under his chin and along his neck. Thank Eywa he is unharmed. Poor thing must have been waiting just outside the base all this time for you, then must have followed the moment he caught your scent leaving.

You guide him back to the group, smiling brighter than before.

“Everyone, this is Paskalin; my ikran.” You introduce him, and Spider bounds close without a second thought. Paskalin bends over to let the boy pet him.

“I thought I recognised you! Good choice not approaching this lot though.” He says to the ikran, and you give Spider a puzzled look. He notices your confusion.

“Saw him a few times when we went flying. Thought he looked familiar. Thought maybe he was following us ‘cuz one of them bonded with his mate or something.” He offers as an explanation. You feel a small twinge in your heart at the thought of your poor boy trying desperately to find you. He must have either recognised Spider, or perhaps even more saddening, your smell may have lingered on Quaritch. No matter. He is with you now.

You turn to the others, noticing then that they are in the process of removing all their gear. No vests. No comms. No guns. Leaving only their clothes. So they were really doing this. They were really going to follow you, Quaritch and Spider. Give up their lives with the RDA and embrace whatever Eywa would throw at them. They all start digging holes to bury their equipment.

“Hey…[Y/N]?” Spider pulls your attention. When you turn to look at him, you see his expression is one of contemplation, perhaps even confusion. There is a slight scowl to his brow.

“What’s wrong, Spider?”

He takes a moment to answer you, as if trying to think of how to broach the topic with you.

“Are…Did you and da—…Quaritch—did the two of you…” ‘Oh sweet Mother, he knows.’ Your ears pin back at the realisation of what he’s trying to ask you. He takes one big breath to calm himself.

“It’s just…I noticed the way he was holding you when we were flying, and the way he keeps looking at you too. It’s just how Jake looks at Neytiri.”

You press your lips together in a fine line. You’re not sure how to feel. Shame? Pride? Love? All of it washes over you. You have loved Quaritch before you even knew he was Spider’s father. That young silly crush of yours. And even when you learnt the truth, of him and his crimes, that did not deter you. And even when he seemingly vanished into thin air, your love for him did not waver.

“It is as it seems…We are mated.” Spider’s eyes widen with your confession. He is shocked. He then makes a face and sound of disgust.

“Does that make you my step-mom now?” the lilt of his voice is laced with teasing tones. You laugh suddenly, and playfully push him. He does the same.

“No way! You’re my brother first! But you have to admit—I’ve definitely been mothering you all since all of you could walk,” you are of course referring to all your younger siblings.

“Pssh, whatever!” he pulls your tail and laughs at your shocked expression. You hiss playfully and he hisses back, running when you start chasing him.

Quaritch watches the two of you giggle like a bunch of children, chasing each other and carrying on. He smiles to himself at the sight. A delicate warmth spreads from his chest and envelops him. He feels grateful to have the two of you in his life.

‘You watchin’ Paz? I’m gonna take good care of that boy. Do right by him, just like I promised. And I won’t be alone neither.’

---

Once everyone is finished burying the last of their gear, you all gather around one another.

“Ok sir, what’s the plan? Where we goin’?” Lyle asks Quaritch.

“Well, that depends on dear [Y/N].” He turns to you, “where we goin’ sweetheart? You know this forest better than any of us.”

You contemplate for a moment. Your first thought is to go back to High Camp. You miss your family something fierce, and it is the safest place you can think of right now. But you are afraid. What if the RDA had a way to track your movements? If they did, you’d be leading them straight to your clan, your family. Thus putting everyone in danger. Quaritch sees the worry adorning your face. He cups the side of your face, pulling you from your thoughts.

“You don’t gotta worry, sweetness. They won’t be able to track us. We ain’t takin’ a damn thing with us they can track. No guns. No coms. Nothing. Even took off the gear they made for the banshees,” he gestures behind him and look to see all their ikrans are bare back now.

You look back to him, and stare up into his golden eyes. They shine so beautifully in the moonlight. You become lost then, as you intently study the specs of light framing his face; committing each one to memory. Gently he rubs his thumb across your cheek, the gently motion soothing you. The two of you become lost in each other’s gaze, to the point of forgetting you weren’t alone.

“Soooo…where’re we going?” Spider speaks, again a hint of teasing in his voice, and the spell is broken. Quaritch seems unbothered though, seemingly not embarrassed to show you affection in front of others; let alone his son and squad.

“Well, darlin’?” you smiles oh so sweetly down at you, and you melt all over again.

“We go home.”

---

When you had said home though, you meant instead, the Tree of Souls. Although you trusted Quaritch with your very life, now that he remembered who he was, you still had reservations about the other 3. You do remember his squad being sizably bigger than this, and wondered where the rest of his team was. Would they follow you all? Did they themselves have ikran? But before taking flight he explained; this really was all that was left.

When he had first captured you and Spider, he lost a few to your family. Then after your capture, the attacks from Sully had increased tenfold. It was during these attacks that he began losing teammates, and slowly, he was left only with his 3 most loyal and trusted.

The attacks had become more frequent, ruthless, and bloodthirsty. And each time, a message was left in blood ‘GIVE HER BACK’. You cried openly at that. Your family had been fighting all this time to get you back. You felt a little saddened that it perhaps didn’t say ‘them’, to include Spider, but you didn’t fault your father. You couldn’t even fathom how he and mother must be feeling. Knowing where you were, but not be able to reach you. To them, you were caught in the arms of their greatest enemy. And that remained true, though in a completely different context now.

‘Oh great Eywa, how am I even going to explain this to them?’ A renewed sense of worry takes over you.

“[Y/N], you okay?” Spider asks you. He’s in front of you, riding with you on your ikran. You nod and force a smile. Everything will be fine. It had to be.

---

You laugh cry when you see the Tree of Souls. There was a time down in that prison where you truly believed you would die; locked away from all that you loved and held dear.

When you come in for a landing, it is barely sunrise. The few people that are there making early morning prayers to Eywa hastily move out the way. The sight of unfamiliar ikrans causing the nearby warriors to draw their bows on you all.

But then they see you and Spider.

“[Y/N]…? Is that you??” One of them calls out, he moves his bow to instead aim at one of the unfamiliar Na’vi.

“Ka'ani!” You smile big and wide at the warrior; a friend of the family, one of the people who had completed their iknimaya alongside your father.

“Who are these Dreamwalkers?”

“Peace, Ka’ni. They helped me escaped.” You move to stand in front his line of fire. A tense moment follows. He studies their faces, their body language. Alert but non-threatening. He verbally signals the surrounding warriors and they all lower their weapons. You breathe a sigh of relief and run toward the hunter, greeting him traditionally. He returns the gesture.

“You’re family has been rife with worry. They will be relieved to know you are unharmed.” He says and puts a hand to your shoulder, giving it a comforting squeeze.

“[Y/N]…?” You look up toward the tree and see your Grandmother making her way from the trunk and down its roots. You don’t even yell, just run at her, tears streaming down your face. You try to say the greeting, but all that comes out is a warbled mess of a cry. She holds you tight in arms, swaying back on forth, giving thanks to Eywa over and over again for your safe return.

“[Y/N]!!! SPIDER!!!” You look behind Mo’at and see Kiri racing toward you. She must have been up early with Mo’at for Tsahik training.

“KIRIIIII!!!” She all but tackles you and Mo’at, the older woman letting out a ‘Oof’ as she braced herself from the impact. Spider comes bounding up and Kiri grabs him and pulls him onto the fold.

Kiri moves from you, all smiles and teary eyed.

“I’m so glad you’re safe sister. Did those guys bring you here?” She looks behind you to the group standing awkwardly with the ikrans. Her expression falls almost immediately, blood running cold. Recognition adorns her face. She looks up at you, then back to them, a quickness to her breath.

“That’s…that’s…” she can’t get the words out.

“There’s…a lot to explain, Kiri. Can…can you get mom and dad? I… I don’t want to bring them to High Camp. Not just yet.” You turn to gaze at the others, your eyes fix onto Quaritch as he meets yours. He gives you the faintest of smiles, and you smile back. He breaks eye contact to address the others. They are too far for you to hear what they are saying; drowned out by the whispers of your clanmates in the vicinity.

Kiri is staring at you. Shock and fear all over her face. She doesn’t catch to whom you smile.

“[Y/N]…don’t tell me…”

You turn to her again, and smile sadly. You know full well that this revelation will disappoint your parents. Kiri doesn’t say anything else; your expression was answer enough. She rushes down to her ikran, and takes off for High Camp.

You watch her go with a heavy heart, anxiety building up all over again.

You hear Mo’at behind you, praying to Eywa for guidance, and to keep you safe.

---

When you see the familiar ikrans of your parents and siblings land, you waste no time and rush to meet them. They even brought little Tuk.

“[Y/N]!” Your mother is the first on you, hugging you tightly to her, holding your face in her hands, checking all over you, making sure you are unharmed. All the while she weeps, he tears breaking the painted patterns on her face. When you see your father you pull him in with one arm and hold both of them so close and so tight, the strain in your arms almost burning.

You see little Tuk running at you as she calls for you. You release your parents and bend down to pick her up. She cries in your arms. You hush her with gentle words, rubbing her back and whisper comforting words, just as you have always done when she cried.

You look behind your parents to see your two brothers standing their trying to act cool and nonchalant.

“Come here you idiots.” You say with tears still streaming down your face but with a smile. That is all the invitation they need and they run you, unceremoniously pushing your parents aside to get to you and hug you tightly. Your folks merely laugh at their antics.

“How’d you escape, kid? Did those guys bring you here?” Your father looks up from you to the group they had ignored, so focused were they on seeing you when they landed. You tense at his question, and carefully hand Tuk back to mother. When you turn to your father you see his expression is anything but pleasant. He’s downright scowling. There is murder in those eyes.

“Is that fucking Quaritch…?” His voice is low and threatening. You swallow your fear. Slowly you move from your family toward the recoms, keeping your gaze on your family. When your mother turns to them, she clutches Tuk closer to her, turning her away from them, letting out a threating and scared hiss.

“Demon!” she spits venomously.

“Hey there Mrs. Sully. Jake. Fancy seeing you here,” Quaritch says, not an ounce of fear in his voice. You inwardly cringe, now was not the time for bravado.

Tentatively you place a hand on his chest, and in a low voice whisper, “peace, my love. Play nice.” He looks to you and nods. He moves to place a hand to your face.

“DON’T YOU DARE FUCKING TOUCH HER!” You here your father yell at the top of his lungs. Before you can even turn, you feel Quaritch grab you with both hands and throw you to the side. Caught of guard, you barely catch yourself with a roll. When you look up, you see your father and mate in a fight. The ikrans, startled, fly up and out of the way, perching themselves elsewhere. All the while they cawing loudly at the sudden excitement.

You watch in horror as the two men fight. Hand to hand, bloody fists flying. You notice though, it is only your father throwing punches. Quaritch dodges what he can, but keeps his arms up to block. Never does he retaliate. It sometimes almost looks like he lets himself get hit.

“YOU FUCKING BASTARD! WHAT DID YOU PEOPLE DO TO HER, HUH?!” When father yells that, you see the falter in Quaritch’s step. He pauses, and lowers his arms. There is a guilty look on his face, his stance almost one of defeat. Jake sees, and doesn’t care. He goes for him then, blade drawn. Immediately you’re on your feet, racing toward them.  Just before your father can bring his blade down into Quaritch’s chest, your on his back, and pull with all your might, bringing him down with you. When you’re on your back, you push as hard as you can, forcing your father to tumble away from you.

He jumps to his feet immediately in fighting a stance, blade drawn.

You stand protectively in front of Quaritch, crouching defensively and hiss at your father. He’s completely taken aback by that, and looks at you confused.

“[Y/N]…?”

You don’t say anything, but stand up and open your arms wide.

“Don’t hurt him! He’s the only reason I’m even here right now!” You hear an angry growl come from your mother.

“He’s the reason you were taken in the first place!” She hisses, and you see she’s drawn her bow, aiming it straight at Quaritch. The rest of your siblings are behind her. You see Tuk cowering behind Kiri’s legs.

You turn then to stand to block her arrow, holding your arms out as far as you can, and you meet your mother’s stare. But she’s not looking at you. Her eyes are fixed solely on the man behind you. You can’t see, but you wonder where he’s looking. Her eyes fall to you, then back to him. You can see her shaking slightly, her face scrunched, conflicted.

“Daughter. Lower your bow…” You hear Mo’at approaching. She stands beside her daughter, her back to you.

“Mother…?” Neytiri is confused. Surely she understands who this Demon is. Slowly she lowers her bow, still gripping it tightly, arrow still knocked and ready.

“That…is your daughter’s mate…”

When she hears that, your mother let’s out the most blood curdling scream you have ever heard. She doesn’t think, only acts on instinct. She lifts her bow, pulls back and fires an arrow aimed straight at his head.

“NO!!!” you screamed as she let the arrow loose.

A powerful wind suddenly sweeps through the area. The force of it enough push you and everyone else to their knees. The coldness bites at your skin to the point it burns. The sting causing your eyes to water, so you squeeze them shut. The force is unrelentingly, assaulting from every direction, causing your hair to wildly thrash around you. You don’t expect it to be so loud either, moving your hands to cover your ears. Barely can you hear the confused cries of everyone around you, all in fear. You faintly hear the sounds of the ikrans above you; all scared caws and bellows.

You try with every ounce of strength you can muster to open your eyes, and are only able to open them but a fraction.

You are surprised then, to see someone standing in front of you, though you can barely make out her profile. When you look up, you see she is staring down at you.

Her skin is so light, it is almost shimmering. The dark gold of her hair remains still, even in this windy assault. You can’t see her eyes. And when you blink, she’s changed. Skin darker than night, but in the early morning sunlight, it is almost iridescent. You think you can see tiny swashes of rainbow dance across her skin. Her hair, still unmoving, is now brilliant white, like the stars in the sky. It is only then that you notice she has one arm raised, and in her hand she holds your mother’s arrow. When you blink again however, she is gone, taking the wind with her. The arrow falls before you, broken at the shaft.

Slowly you move your hands from your ears, wiping the tears from your eyes. You hear the groans and scared cries of the people around you.

“[Y/N]! You alright?!” Immediately Quaritch has his hands on you, turning you to face him. He searches your face, and once he’s satisfied, he pulls you to him in a tight embrace. He sighs in relief into your hair.

Neytiri can only sit and stare. She has no words for the sight before her. And she weeps. Weeps at her daughter in the arms of her sworn enemy. Weeps at the shadow she saw in the wind. She is no fool. She understood, and she weeps; for although she will never question the Will of the Great Mother, she cannot stop herself from feeling great sadness.

---

Awkward.

It is so unbearably awkward.

After what happened at the Spirit Tree, Mo’at insisted all of you, the recoms included, return to High Camp. Eywa has made her stance on the matter quite clear.

So here you sit, in your family’s tent, Quaritch at your side. Your parents sit across from you, staring daggers at the man. Your father has his arms crossed. Their gaze flitters from him to you. You to him. Your eyes are cast downward, unable to meet theirs. You fiddle with the hem of the shirt you’re wearing as you sit on your knees.

The rest of Quaritch’s squad was sent to where actual Avatars were kept, told they weren’t allowed to leave the barracks, and if they did, they’d be shot on sight.

Your siblings where given strict instructions to not disturb any of you until this, meeting, was complete.

“Explain.” That is the only word you father says. Only thing he needs to say. You open your mouth to speak, but father cuts you off. “He can speak for himself.”

Like you, Quaritch is sitting on his knees. He feels humiliated, being forced into this submissive pose. He remembers clearly how he was Jake’s superior. But he has to remind himself, he is on Jake’s territory now. And Jake is quite literally the Leader.

“What’dya wanna know, Sully?”

“Start from the very beginning. How the fuck are you back, for a start. Pretty sure that’s your arrow riddled corpse down there on the old battlefield.”

You see Quaritch’s tail flinch at that. You consciously bring your tail and wind it around his, calming him. Your mother sees this, and you hear her curse under hear breath at him, calling him all manner of profanities. You don’t untangle your tails.

You listen intently as Quaritch explains then. How he and his squad were subject to having copies of all their memories up to a certain point made. How they had to record videos for their resurrected selves, to explain the situation. He didn’t go into detail about what he recorded.

He explained how he remembered Spider’s birth and his mother. You tighten your tail around his as a tightness in your chest forms. This was before your time, yet you can’t help the coil of jealously in your gut. This was your mate. It is you who should have given him children first.

He talks about how he remembers the assault on home tree, the death of Spider’s mother. But that’s where his memory ends. He has no recollection of his own death.

“That’s how it was…until I got my memories back. All of them.” He looks to you as he says that, his expression soft and loving.

“What do you mean?” Father asks, confusion on his face.

“Eywa.”

Your mother makes an angry growl at that.

“You do not speak her name! You have no right!” She spits at him, pointing at him accusingly.

“Wait a minute now Mrs. Sully, I’m only here because of Her, alright?”

“Are you saying, this, is Her fault?” She points between the two of you.

“Well kind of, I mean, but not really—well?” Quaritch is struggling for the right words. He doesn’t want to outwardly blame Eywa, but she didn’t exactly stop either of you.

“Mother, let me explain.” You try and use your most diplomatic voice, soft and gentle. She looks to you, hurt evident in her eyes. But she sits back and lets you speak.

---

You start from your beginning. The Dreams. How, as a child, you met a human man, not the friendliest of sorts, but happily indulged you when you asked about humanity and their Home. How he took every opportunity to brag about his people and their accomplishments. How over time you came to learn he was a dead soul, kept by Eywa, and he knew it too. There came a time, years on when you were much older, that when he gave you his real name, (you had been addressing him by title only), you knew who he was.

The two of you never spoke about it, but you know who he was then. And when you gave him your full name, the implications of who you were became known. For reasons you cannot explain, you kept approaching him in your Dreams, after all the years you two had a sort of friendship.

You then spoke of how you couldn’t stop yourself, but you developed a crush on this older man. He didn’t treat you like a freak, not like the boys in the clan. Sure he may have treated you like a bit of a nuisance as a kid, but warmed up to you as time passed, especially when it was clear you weren’t going away.

“And so um…You remember, a few years ago, when I had…all those…marks?”

You watch with baited breath as realisation dawns on both your parents features. A strangled cry leaves your mother and she lunges for Quaritch. Jake grabs her around the waist, holding her steadfast to him. She fights to free herself from him, but she has little fight in her. She isn’t crying, but she is yelling and screaming at Quaritch, calling him all manner of vile filth she can muster in English. Your father whispers in her ear, trying to calm her, holding her head to his chest. She relents eventually, an almost cry escapes her lips as she buries her head into his neck, holding him close.

You lips quiver as you struggle not to cry. You have never felt such shame in your life. You start to question every choice you have ever made. Before you can fall into a descent of self-loathing, you feel a hand slide into yours, entwining your fingers. You look up to your mate, tears threatening in the corner of your eyes.

The look he gives you washes away any doubt. Spider was right. He looks at you just like father looks at mother; like you yourself hung the stars in the sky. Reverence.

“I don’t understand though…You were dead. How were you able to, interact?” You father has a confused and disgusted look on his face.

“We figured that, whatever happened to my soul in the shared Dreamscape, must get reflected onto my body in the real world.”

Father nods, not questioning further, he didn’t want the details.

“Colonel…You know that’s incredibly fucked up right?” Jake directs his ire to Quaritch. The man has no response. He knows what he did was wrong. He lowers his head in shame.

“I’m sor—”

“DON’T YOU DARE APOLOGISE!”

Everyone jumps at your sudden outburst. You gaze is fixed solely on your mate, hurt and anger in your eyes. You turn to him, grabbing both his hands firmly in yours.

“Don’t you dare say those words, you here me? I’m not sorry it happened. I was not some ignorant child. I knew what I was doing was wrong. And I knew better, I simply didn’t care! You made me happy. Really happy! Happier than I had been in, months, years even. And I was already falling hopelessly in love with you. And Eywa be damned, I would do it all over again.” You place a soft kiss to his knuckles. You see his lips press into a thin line as he tries to hold himself back, ears pressed back. He breaks eye contact, looking down at your joint hands instead. You understand the things he cannot say in front of your parents, and gently squeeze his hands. You feel him squeeze back.

“Ma Jake, I—I can’t,” You mother says and abruptly gets to her feet and hastily leaves. He calls for her, but she doesn’t come back. It breaks your heart, but you swallow the lump in your throat. You’ll cry it out later.

“Dad, it’s okay…It’s a lot for her to take in…” He sighs heavily.

“You can say that again…I remember though. Your attitude changed. Seemed like you had a falling out with the person we thought you were seeing.”

“Ah well, he kinda disappeared.”

“Disappeared?” He looks to Quaritch, confused. Said man clears his throat.

“Like I said before. Eywa. She came to me. Said She needed me for a purpose, but was gonna put me to sleep. Said when I wake up, it’d be in a new body. Thing is, none of us that made these backups, even knew we were gonna get resurrected in Na’vi bodies. But She did. Said, the memories would never be enough. The bodies wouldn’t work. Think She said something like, ‘These Na’vi bodies will exist because I allow it. And they will end, because I demand it.’ Then She knocked me out before I could ask more.”

You father nods and huffs, taking it all in. He’s quite for time, contemplating, thinking.

“So, you’re really Quaritch then? Not some, fake with memories?”

“In the flesh.”

“I’ll say.” You slap a hand to your mouth, unexpectedly chiming in with a flirt. You father frowns at you and you look elsewhere.

“Fuck man…FUCK.” Your father rubs the back of his head in frustration. “This is serious bullshit!” He gets up and starts pacing back and forth, muttering to himself. Eventually he stops, a deep aggravated sigh leaving him.

“Look…I’ll talk to your mother. Try and calm her down. I can’t promise you guys anything. Quite frankly I’d have been happier just killing YOU,” he points at Quaritch, “but if Eywa wants you alive then so be it. I can’t guarantee the rest of the clan is going to be keen on the idea of you staying, and I’m not about to risk unrest to make you comfortable.”

“I understand…”

Quicker than you’re able register, your father has a blade pressed to Quaritch’s neck. You gasp but make no move to stop him this time.

“If you hurt her...There is no place on this planet, no place that the Great Mother can protect you. I will find you. And I will kill you.”

“I’d sooner die than hurt her.”

“Good. Then we finally agree on something.”

You father pulls back and holsters his blade.

“Get out of here. I had the kids set up a tent for you to use.”  He dismisses Quaritch with a wave of his hand. Suddenly Spider is there, and you wonder if the entire little entourage had been eavesdropping this whole time. “Spider show him where his tent is.”

“Yes sir.”

Quaritch gets up and follows without another word. You get up to follow but your father stops you.

“Wait, [Y/N]. I want to speak with you in private.”

Quaritch gives you one forlorn look over his shoulder before he exists the tent.

---

You stand in silence as you wait for father to address you. He doesn’t, and instead, grabs you and pulls you into his arms. He holds you tight, pressing your head into his shoulder. You bring your arms up around him without a second thought.

“I’m so glad you’re safe, baby girl…I—we really got worried there. Thought we weren’t gonna see you again…”

You pull back and wipe a stray tear from your eye.

“Heard you turned up the heat.” He lets out a laugh like huff at that.

“Yeah, I may have gotten a little over zealous…But I’m glad you’re back, safe and sound.” He kisses your head and hugs you tightly again. “I love you, [Y/N].”

“Love you too, Dad.”

There is a beat of silence that passes between you two, just holding each other tight. You’re reminded then, of how this was the safest place to you as a child.

“Is…is this what you really want? Does he really make you happy?”

“Yeah Dad…he really does.” You say, not a hint of shame in your voice. You father sighs in defeat again. Poor man’s been doing that a lot lately.

“Alright… I sure as shit don’t like it, in fact I’m pretty sure I hate it. But, I wonder if this is what Neytiri’s parents felt like when she chose me, kinda. Well, not really the same, cuz ya know, it wasn’t directly me that blew up—”

“Dad please. You’re rambling.”

“Right, right, sorry. Just…Give your mother and grandmother time, yea? It’s gonna take a lot more time for them to come around to this idea. Hell, I’m not sure I’m entirely on board here. So please, please, be patient with them. With us.”

“Of course father. Without question. Thank you,” you hug him tightly one more time before you make your exist. You want nothing more than to fall into your mate’s arms.

When you exist the tent, you aren’t the least bit surprised to find your younger siblings scrambling to their feet. Of course they heard everything. Awkwardly they stand around, avoiding your piercing gaze. Well, everyone except Tuk. She runs to you and demands to be picked up. You do so without question, hugging her tightly.

“I’m pretty sure we were all taught how rude it is to eavesdrop,”

“It was Lo’ak’s idea!” Tuk tattles without a second thought.

“Tuk?!” He yells at her. She merely sticks a tongue out him. You simply laugh at their antics. Neteyam clears his throat and moves to take Tuk from you. She moves without a fight.

“So…Spider’s dad? Really?” Lo’ak speaks up and you cringe at the phrasing.

“Yep,” you say with a load pop to the ‘p’. You look to Kiri and see the angry and confused look to her face. Understandable, you think, knowing that he’s the reason her mother isn’t around.

“Kiri—” she holds a hand to you, stopping you from continuing.

“Don’t [Y/N], just—don’t. I don’t know how to feel about, any of this…But I felt her, Eywa, when we were down at the Spirit Tree. She saved him. For reasons I will never truly understand. So…Urgh. I don’t know. I’m happy for you, I guess?” There’s expiration in her voice. You know she’s trying her best to be supportive. Finding ones mate was always supposed to be a beautiful thing. You give her the best smile you can muster under the circumstances.

“Thank you, Kiri…” She gives you a curt nod, then takes Tuk from Neteyam.

“I’m gonna go help grandmother, I’ll talk to you later,” and with that she makes a hasty exit.

Lo’ak pats you on the back, sensing your sadness.

“It’ll be alright sis. She’ll come around.” You smile appreciatively at his words.

“Heh…aren’t you guys, disgusted in me too?” Lo’ak merely shrugs at you.

“It’s nice to know I’m not the only screw up around here.”

“Oi!” You punch his arm playfully, he hisses at the pain but laughs all the same, rubbing the tender spot.

“Regardless…” Neteyam breaks his silence. “Just, be careful [Y/N]. I don’t want to see you get hurt.” You regard him with a solemn smile.

“Bit late for that I’m afraid,” Your two brothers share a look but don’t press you for answers. “Anyway, can you show me where his tent is set up?” Lo’ak gestures you to follow him, and Neteyam goes off on his own, having other tasks to do.

---

When you enter his living space, you're surprised to see Spider still there. They both look up when they sense your presence.

“We’ll finish this later, son.” Quaritch says and gently pets Spider on his shoulder. The boy smiles at him and goes to leave, not before hugging you. Once he's left, you go about closing off the tent, ensuring the two of you have the utmost privacy, all the while Quaritch watches you silently.

Satisfied all is secure and there should be no interruptions, you walk straight over to where he is sitting. You drop yourself into his lap, legs wrapping tightly around his mid. You press yourself as hard as you can to him, as if he could swallow you whole into his very being. Head pressed into the bottom of his throat, your arms go around his neck, gripping tightly at his hair. It hurts but he doesn’t mind, doesn’t voice a single complaint.

Strong arms wrap around you, warm, secure, and tightly. You cry then; you’ve been doing that a lot lately. But you don’t care right now. You break down in your mates arms.

Every fear, regret, guilt, and sadness pouring from you all at once.

The meeting with your parents perhaps didn’t go as disastrously as it could have; no one died at least. But you wish it could have gone better. You feel terrible for what your mother must be going through. She must feel like the whole world is against her.

To bring her worst enemy, the very man that caused the death of her father, and then to have said man be mated with you? The thought causes you cry even harder. It is an ugly cry, nothing but tears and snot.

Quaritch doesn’t give a damn though. He rocks you back and forth in his arms, one hand goes to the back of your head, the other starts rubbing up and down your spine in a soothing motion. He starts humming then, a song you don’t recognise. The low vibrations of his voice gently bringing your crying to but a whimper.

“It's alright baby, I got you. You’re safe with me.” He whispers in your ear, and suddenly exhaustion sits heavily on your shoulders. You feel so drained from everything that’s happened. You close your eyes and let sleep take you, lulled by his continued humming.

---

Tag List: @drinking-tea-and-be-obsessed, @lvangel98, @rsclopez, @onlyreadz @manymaria111, @kristeen31xxx @mechformers @olivia-the-weirdo @essenceinpink @villirios @rededfoxy @brutecuteness

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Author's Note: Thank you to everyone who's been following this story! If I missed you in the tags please let me know! I think there might only be 1 or 2 more parts left to this short story! Hahaha this was initially started with the intention of being a oneshot; with the excuse to write smut. Yet here we are on part freaking 4.

MFW I thought this was a oneshot:

LMAO SUPRISED MYSELF--! Anyway big thank you to everyone who enjoys it so far! Will get back to my main fic once I wrap this baby up xoxo Also thank you again for the likes, comments and retweets! Any engagement really motivates me to write more! <3

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<previous chapter> | 4 | <next chapter>

What Do I Tell My Friends Family? Pt. 6

word count: 4003

Pairing: Recom! Miles! Quaritch x Female! Sully! Na'vi! Reader Tags/Warnings: hurt, comfort, feels, lots of crying

Author's Note: Apologies in advance for any grammatical errors! Hope you enjoy this next installment :)))

<previous chapter> | 6 | <next chapter>

The weeks that followed could only be described as uncomfortable. Those of the clan gave you and Quaritch a wide berth. You did not miss their obvious sneers, nor the harsh whispers under their breath. Yet you cannot find it in yourself to fault them; such a reaction was more than understandable, perhaps even warranted.

The humans were far more courteous, even those with Avatars; but they too kept it to what was minimal etiquette. You noticed though, that they were far more cordial with the other recoms. You watched them converse with each other, animatedly talking about something or rather. It made you envious, a feeling you knew all too well.

Quaritch tells you not to worry; says it doesn’t bother him. But you wondered how much weight such words truly held. You’re thankful he and the recoms at least have each other, as bittersweet as it was. On the nights where you would eat dinner with your family, he and his squad ate together in one of their dwellings; the night filled with reminiscing of lives past and wishes for the future. Their revelry is downright infectious, and you often excuse yourself early to join them. It fills your heart with unbridled warmth to see Spider with them too. More often than not he would also join when it was just you and Quaritch alone.

At one point you had gathered all your siblings together, sitting them down and giving them a less graphic (for Tuk’s benefit) retelling of you and your mate’s meeting and eventual courtship. Your brothers, bless them, treated you no different, told you that they didn’t care and were happy for you. When you cornered them afterwards to speak privately, you wept and wept, thanks spilling from your lips over and over again.

They reiterated once more that they were just happy you came back alive and well. Regardless of the less-than-ideal circumstances surrounding your introduction to one another, and his sordid history, they were simply happy you had found your one true mate. Moreover, as far as they were concerned, if Eywa herself deemed it necessary to get this involved in your lives, then she must see something in him. If she could forgive him for his sins, then who were they to hold it against him? He paid his price in blood.

Sweet little Tuk; everything that had happened was perhaps a little too big for such a young mind, but you tried to explain yourself as best as you can to such a young one. She hummed in thought, called you and your mate weird, but if he made you happy like dad makes mum happy, then he must be okay. She was also the only one of your siblings that wanted to actually speak with Quaritch face to face.

You were reluctant, afraid of how mother might react. But little Tuk is rambunctious in nature. She barged in one night when you and Quaritch were having dinner with Spider. Hands on her hips she proclaimed with unwavering authority,

“If you wanna be in my family, then first you gotta apologize!” Her eyes were fixated on Quaritch, who stared back at her with shock all over his face. When he didn’t immediately say anything she elaborated further.

“That time…When you took my big sister…You and those scary people hurt us, and that wasn’t very nice…” She frowned at him, eyes glistening.

When you looked to your mate you saw the guilt in his eyes, how his ears flattened and tail wrapped around his waist. He got to his knees, tried to make himself as small possible in an attempt to be closer to her eye level. And he apologized. He apologized for scaring her, for hurting her. But most of all, he was so sorry he took you. He doesn’t give her any excuses; simply admits he did something wrong and was sorry.

She nods at him, but says nothing else; though you see the tightness of her expression loosen. Spider walks over to her and ruffles her hair which makes her giggle.

“Here kid, I got a little somethin’ for ya,” Quaritch says and reaches into his pants pocket. He pulls out a small wooden carving of a pa'li. He holds out the tiny figurine balanced in the palm of his hand. Tuk’s eyes widen and she grabs it with a loud thank you. She holds it up to her face, turning it around to admire it.

“You made this?” She asks, looking up at him expectantly.

“Yes. Your sister here helped me too. Made sure it looked right.” And it was true; you had spent many nights by his side, carefully instructing him on pa'li anatomy. You were surprised when he approached you and spoke of his intention to carve her the small figurine. He explained he felt inspired when you had offhandedly mentioned her fondness for the animal.

Tuk looks between him and figure a few times, then gives him one final once over before nodding her head.

“Hmm. I guess you can stay. [Y/N] likes you, so…And you’re Spider’s dad, and I like big brother Spider.” She smiles up at the aforementioned boy, who ruffles her hair once again affectionately.

“Okay bye I wanna show this to Lo’ak!” And with that she’s sprinted off before any of you can say anything more.

---

It was disheartening to come to the realization that Kiri was avoiding you. She didn’t outright ignore you per say, but she was always too busy or had other pressing matters to attend to; never was she free to sit and talk to you.

You broke down crying one night, alone with Quaritch. Immediately you were pulled into his embrace. His strong arms held you tight as he whispered comforting words into your hair.

You hadn’t noticed Spider just outside. He had come with the intent to eat with you two as usual, but stopped himself when he heard your cries. He listened to the words you spoke, laden with heartache for your sister.

You didn’t hear him leave either.

---

“You’ve gotta talk to her.” Spider finds Kiri inside watching her mother’s video logs.

“I’m sorry, what?” She turns to him alarmed.

“[Y/N]. You have to talk to her.” He pleads.

Kiri shakes her head at him and turns back to the video.

“I don’t have to do anything. Besides, what’s there to even talk about…” her voice travels off at the end, as if she was unsure of her own words.

“Are you being serious right now? Kiri…” He grabs her by the shoulders and turns her around to face him. She’s at his eye level from kneeling in front of the console.

“What do you want from me Spider? You know as well as I do what he’s done in the past. And she does too; but I guess that doesn’t matter anymore…”

“That’s not fair, Kiri—”

“You wanna know what’s NOT fair, Spider?! The fact that I have wake up every day knowing that the man who shot and killed my mother, is alive and well! And not only that, he’s mated to my sister!” There’s tears in her eyes as her voice rises; the frustration of it all bubbling over.

Spider can feel the anger radiating off of her, white hot and unravelling; a crescendo of emotion bottled up for who knows how long. The dam breaks and she sobs, fists clenched tight.

“So now, he gets to play house with my family, [Y/N] gets her Eywa-given mate, and you get your dad back! And what do I get? NOTHING!”

Spider flinches when she screams.

“What happened to ‘us orphans have to stick together’…? Am I going to lose you too…?” Spider’s eyes grow wide at her admission. Her fears laid out before him; she felt as though she was losing her family to Quaritch? Was she blind? He hates that she’s feeling like this, wishing he knew how to make it all go away. But at the same time, he can’t help but feel his own bout of anger and frustration.

“Kiri…You never were an orphan; not really…You know that, right?”

He looks at her with a serious expression. Her lips press into a thin line at his words.

“You had Jake and Neytiri. You literally call them mum and dad. Me? Who did I have? Yea Norm and the others raised me; but no one was really my parent…Norm was more like a big brother. And I’m not blind or stupid Kiri; your folks never considered me part of the family. Only you guys did…”

She knows all too well what her parents think of Spider. Mother was not as subtle as she thought she was. Father at least treated him well, but there was still this disconnection from Spider being human.

As they stared at one another, it became clear to both of them that there was perhaps a lot of hurt left yet to heal.

---

Despite the passage of time, you have yet to properly speak with your mother. Words left unspoken causing a rift to form between you two. Small at first, you feel the cracks forming as it has been left to sit and fester. She treats you with the same love and care you have always known, but something has undoubtedly changed. It’s there, behind a lingering gaze, the hesitance of touch, the near imperceivable sharp intake of breath, but with no words that follow.

The tension at dinner time is thick, near palpable. Your brothers try their best to fill the awkward silence with pleasant conversation, driving it as far from the topic of your mate as possible. Kiri obviously says nothing, much to your disappointment. Mother smiles but it does not reach her eyes.

When you eventually muster up the courage to speak with Mo’at, you are surprised; you had expected her to be just as, if not more, against it all as mother. But she is pragmatic, understanding that this providence cannot be ignored. Her unique spiritual bond with Eywa allowed a deeper understanding into the intricacies of the Great Mother’s Will. Though she would not forgive him any time soon, she would at least accept his place among her family and her People; if this was Her Way, the so it must Be. She didn’t have to like it, but she did have to respect it.

You asked her how best to approach your own mother. She tells you that you must speak from the heart, but be open to the idea that Neytiri may never accept things as they are. She is not Tsahik and never will be. Though she has great love for Eywa, this hurt cuts far deeper than you may yet understand. She says that Neytiri perhaps needs to commune with her father’s spirit and seek out his guidance. Perhaps even from Eywa herself.

You nod and thank her for speaking with you. You turn to leave but she stops you with a hand on your shoulder. When you turn back around she pulls you into a warm hug. She tells you everything will be okay; Eywa has deigned it so. That she is sorry you have suffered such hardship, but she knows you are strong and capable, and will get through this one way or another.

You cry shamelessly into her embrace for a long while.

---

When next to happen to find yourself alone in the company of your father, you fix him with a question that has been plaguing your mind.

“You know…I’m surprised you’re not as, angry, as mother is about all this.” You watch his face trying to gauge his reaction. His countenance is thoughtful though a scowl does form. He schools his expression quickly.

“Trust me kid; I am.” There is an underlying bitterness in his words that leaves you with an uncomfortable clench in your stomach.

“But…Eywa accepted me and forgave me for my part in the destruction of Home Tree and everything after that. She came to our aid when shit hit the fan, helping us drive back the RDA. She’s done a lot for me and our family. And if what Quaritch says is true, that our Avatar bodies only work because she allows them to? Then I got a helluva lot more to be grateful for. I wouldn’t have Neytiri, Mo’at, your siblings, the clan, or you for that matter.”

Your lips quiver with the strain to not cry. It becomes nigh impossible with the way father is smiling down at you. He places both hands on your shoulders.

“I took a lot from Pandora…But you and your siblings? You guys are the one good thing I put in.” You heart swells and you lose your battle to not cry. When Jake sees your tears he pulls you in, rubbing your back soothingly as you weep.

“No matter how grown up you get, you’ll always be my baby girl…It’s gonna be okay, I promise.”

You sniffle as you try to calm yourself. You are a little fed up with all the crying you’ve been doing lately.

“How can you be so sure?” He shrugs his shoulders.

“Call it a father’s intuition.” This time, you return his smile.

---

Tonight finds you in the arms of your husband. The two of you are deep within the forest, somewhere far from High Camp and Bridgehead. You found a secluded perch on which to lay and watch Eywa paint the sky in brilliant starlight. Your snuggled into his side, head resting on his broad chest. You listen to calm rhythmic beating of his heart. It comforts you.

His arm encloses you, pressing you tightly to him. Your hands, fingers entwined, rest atop where his heart is.

“What’s going on through that pretty little head of yours?” His voice draws you in, pulling your lazy gaze from the sky and to his face. There is a warmth in his eyes, a kind curiosity. He brings your hand up and presses a kiss to your knuckles. You loved it when he was soft and gentle. Though you were, of course, eager and willing for his rougher ministrations when the mood struck.

You smile softly and hum in response.

“Hmmm. Just thinking about how much I love you.”

You are rewarded with the goofiest smile you’ve ever seen adorn his handsome face. Sometimes it feels as though he could never get used to your declarations of love and affection. You wonder if he was starved of such a thing. The thought baffles you, as your people loved freely and were not ashamed to express such feelings to friends and family.

You don’t dwell on it though; resolving to smother him with everything he may or may not have been denied all his life.

You move yourself off his chest but don’t untangle your hand from his. Instead, you lay on your back and pull him as you do. Miles follows, moving himself above you; caging you in between his arms, his face mere inches from yours.

You stare at him; studying. You take note of every luminous freckle, the strength of his cheek bones, the grooves of his nose, the breadth of his jaw. Your hand moves to his face and cups his cheek. His skin is warm to the touch. Your thumb traces the lines of his lips. He closes his eyes and leans into your hand.

When he looks at you once more with a half-lidden gaze, lovesick and smiling, it stirs something deep within you. The flicker of a flame comes to life, its warmth all encompassing. That look of reverence on his face; you never want to stop. Not in this lifetime or the next.

You resolve to protect that smile by any means necessary.

---

The two of you weren’t in your tent this morning, and Neytiri huffs in frustration. After much talks with Jake, communing with Eywa, she had finally decided to try talking with you once more. The next morning of course. But much to her dismay, no one was at the tent when she called. She saw no one inside when she quickly looked inside, but did not linger as it smelt far too much like The Demon.

She cusses under her breath. She knows she’s going to have to get out of the habit of calling him that. Start addressing him by his name.

Unsure of where the two of you might be, she makes her way back to her own dwelling. Jake is there, cleaning one of his guns. He looks up when he hears her familiar footfalls.

“That was quick,” he says, a confused look on his face.

“They weren’t there.”

“Oh. Maybe one of the kids saw em’.”

She nods and sets out to find her other children.

---

Alas, it would prove futile; none of the others had seen either of you since the night before, when you had told Spider you and Quaritch were going out to watch the stars.

Speaking of Spider, where was he? If anyone was going to know where you two were, it’d be him.

Neytiri makes her way over to the scientist buildings; if he wasn’t with her children, he more than likely would be here.

She enters the one housing Grace’s Avatar, and finds Norm up and about, not yet in his Avatar. He turns and is surprised to see her of all people, rather than her kids, enter. Still, he is happy to see her all the same.

“Neytiri? Oel ngati kameie! What brings you here?”

“Oel ngati kameie, Norm. Have you seen Spider? Or [Y/N]?” She smiles and greets him with equal enthusiasm. His expression becomes perturbed at the question though.

“No sorry, haven’t seen Spider since…Huh. Actually the day before yesterday? Thought he was staying with [Y/N] and Quaritch.”

Neytiri’s stomach drops at the notion. Has no one really seen either of you three for the passed two days? And no one said anything? What kind of mother was she then, to not notice?? Her mind starts racing, but she takes a deep breath; calming herself before she spiraled out of control. There was no need to overthink; you may have simply been too busy.

“Have you tried asking the other recoms? I’m sure one of them must’ve seen em’ at some point.” She nods at him; it was a good place to continue.

“I have not. Thank you Norm. I shall go see them.”

Briskly she leaves, not another word said; far too eager to find you as soon as possible.

---

She eventually finds the three of them conversing with some of the other Avatars. She cares not for their topic of conversation, walking up and interrupting them without a second thought.

“You three.” She addresses them coldly; the others sense the rising tension and quickly make their escape.

“Mrs. Sully! What can we do for you?” The bald one, Lyle if she remembers correctly, asks her.

“My daughter. Have you seen her? What of your, leader, or his son?”

Instead of answering, the three of them simply share a look amongst themselves, before they all look back to her. The uncomfortable feeling is back tenfold. There is something in their gaze, an almost apologetic look in their eyes. She hates it, nor does she understand why they look upon her so.

“What? What is wrong?” She demands, the agitation ever growing.

Mansk clears his throat and steps forward.

“Come with us Mrs. Sully…And bring your husband too.”

Her stomach clenches something awful; her mother’s intuition stings.

---

The 5 of them congregate in Mansk’s private dwelling. He gestures for everyone to sit down, get comfortable. Jake too can’t help but notice the sullen looks adorning the others’ faces. Nor his he miss the nervous twitch of his wife’s tail. He grabs her hand and squeezes it reassuring. She looks to him, taking a deep breath as she nods.

Mansk re-emerges from wherever he went, brandishing a tablet in hand. He sits himself in front of everyone, holding the tablet for them to see.

“Here…A message was given to us, to give to you when you came.” He moves his hand and hits play.

Instantly you are on the screen. You are nervously rubbing the back of your neck. Quaritch is sitting next to you; he is leaning forward, resting his elbows on his knees and fingers loosely threaded in front of him.

“Hello mother, father, precious siblings…” Neytiri squeezes Jake’s hand harder. She does not like how your voice sounds as you speak.

“If you’re seeing this, then you’re all probably wondering where we—I am…” You pause, hand on your heart and you take a deep breath to calm yourself. Neytiri notices then, Spider mulling around in the background. Back and forth he moves, as if in a hurry.

“I don’t know how else to word this, so I’m just going to come out and say it. I’ve left. WE, have left. Me, Spider, and Miles.” You glance over to Quaritch and smile, grabbing his hand in yours, threading fingers together. Your face returns to that awful tired expression when you look back to the camera.

“I’m sorry I did this without saying goodbye…But this was for the best. If there was even a chance, no matter how small, that any of you would try to stop us…Well, I didn’t want to take that chance. I’m so sorry, I really mean that. For everything…Father? Thank you for taking care of me. I love you, to Earth and back. Please remember to take care of yourself too, not just the family or the clan…

Kids? I know you’re probably gonna hate me for a while, leaving like this and all—but like I said. My mind is made up and I don’t want any of you trying to stop us. I love each and every one of you so much. No one could ask for better siblings. Please be good to each other. And boys? Start actually listening to dad once in a while, yea?”

You pause to wipe a few stray tears. Neytiri is sobbing quietly as she clenches Jake’s hand painfully. She doesn’t see him swallow hard the lump in his throat.

“Mama?” Neytiri sits up straight when you address her directly.

“I don’t think I could every forgive myself for hurting you. I am so sorry, more than words could ever express…You took good care of me, took good care of this family. I am proud to call you my mother, and no matter how far the wind takes me, I will always love you. I hope you can forgive me one day…” You gently place a hand on your stomach.

“I do not want to cause dissent amongst my family, or the clan, any longer…And one day when I start my own family, with the man I love… I don’t want them to feel like they don’t belong. So here we go, somewhere far beyond the horizon, to find a place we can truly call our own…” Your smile is bright and unwavering, even when the tears don’t stop.

“Please keep taking such good care of each other. Promise me you will. Sullys stick together, our family is our fortress, right? Well, these two? They are my family now, they are my fortress, and I will do what I must to keep them safe, happy, accepted...Whether or not the clan or some of you can accept it, know that I love each and every one of you, forever and ever…So until I see you again, May Eywa keep you all safe…Goodbye...”

You wave at the camera before leaning forward to touch something unseen, and the video ends.

Neytiri breaks down then and there. She falls into Jake’s arms, clutching at him desperately. Her wails crack her voice as she calls for you. Jake sheds silent tears as he holds her tight. He fights every instinct in him demanding he grab his ikran and blindly fly after you.

The other recoms sit and silence, heads lowered, as they take in the sight before them.

A mother’s heartache was truly one of the saddest things to bare witness to.

---

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