Aziraphale Has A Snake Habitat Lil Setup In His Bookshop But It's Frequently Empty And His Customers

Aziraphale has a snake habitat lil setup in his bookshop but it's frequently empty and his customers are frequently 1) confused and 2) worried there's a snake loose in the shop.

Crowley is minding the shop for a moment and a customer asks him where the snake went. Crowley says, "Oh, he likes to get up and walk around sometimes." This helps nothing.

Sorry sorry I hate to tread on your amazing idea, but I got inspired and wanted to write something for it! :D

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“Pat?” Virgil’s voice was soft, his eyes wide and confused. Patton could feel himself ripping in two even as he looked at the other side, too ashamed of his past actions to respond. Virgil glanced down to the floor. He bit his lip.

“Patton?” Now Roman spoke, and unlike Virgil, his voice was guarded, his tone sharp. “What did you just say?” The creative side looked down on the man he thought was his friend, and Patton could feel tears prick in the corners of his eyes.

“I didn’t mean to,” he whispered. “I would never mean to hurt you.” Patton wouldn’t make eye contact with either of them, shakily fiddiling with his glasses.

“I don’t understand why you all are are so confused,” Logan said, though even his voice carried a twinge or sadness in it. “He already told us that he was the one to push the others away.” Logan paused, closing his eyes for only a moment before regaining his composure. “Deciet, Remus, and... Virgil.”

Virgil wouldn’t look up from the ground, now chewing nervously on his fingernail.

“Kiddo?” Patton asked desperately, voice cracking with emotion and barely more than a whisper. “I didn’t mean to. You believe me, right? We’re the bestest most dynamicest duo, right?”

Virgil still wouldn’t look at him. When he finally spoke once more, his voice was charged with something akin to wistfulness. “When Thomas was a teenager, I really started to hold some sway over his actions, maybe moreso than any of you. It was a huge responsibility, and I tried to manage it accordingly. At the time, I felt as though I was doing what was best for Thomas, keeping him safe. And everyone hated me for it.” Virgil’s tone had turned sour. “I never understood that part. I was just trying to help, just doing what I was supposed to do. And everyone pushed me away for it. So I pushed back. I was confused as to why anyone would try to silence me, and I grew bitter. I struggled so hard to get out of that endless loop of hatred and loathing.” Virgil let out a humorless laugh. “It’s good to know that the ones who pushed me away are, deep down, no better than me.”

Patton let out a little, choked sounding sob.

Virgil looked up then, making direct eye contact with Patton. “Trying to force my way back to you was the worst decision I’ve ever made.” Virgil bit his lip again, pain clear on his face.

Patton inhaled, his whole body shuttering, the tears in his eyes threatening to overflow. He couldn’t even bring himself to call out for Virgil one last time.

“Virgil, wait-“ Logan tried, and then Virgil was gone. He didn’t sink out, he was just gone. And Patton could feel the hole in his heart growing.

Roman spoke up then. “He’s right, you know.”

Patton whirled around to face the creative side.

“When Thomas was young, no older than five or six, Remus was always there with me. When I was sad, he would comfort me. When he was in trouble, I would cover for him. We were inseparable.” It was Roman’s turn to laugh, though it came out more a mockery of a laugh than anything else. “Well... we were inseparable. Clearly we were quite separable by the time you started to dictate who was or wasn’t good for Thomas.” Roman shook his head. “You’re no better than the monsters you made them out to be. I’m done with this conversation.”

Very slowly, Roman sunk down, clearly repressed tears beginning to fall.

And Patton stood there, torn almost to shreds, tears falling freely down his face. Very slowly, he turned to face Logan, who remained emotionless. “Lo?” He whispered.

“Ah, Patton.” Logan was inspecting a speck of dust on his shirt. “I- I think I should just leave right now. It would be the... ah, logical thing to do.”

Patton nodded, more to himself than Logan, as Logan hastily sank out of the room. As soon as he was gone, Patton collapsed to the ground. Tears dripped from his cheeks to the floor. His shaky breathing seemed to fill the room, a terrifying crescendo of all of his wrongdoings.

And so Patton sat there, and he sobbed.

Please don’t leave me.

I just wanted what was best for Thomas.

More tears hit the floor. Drip, drop. Drip, drop.

just imagine it comes out that Patton (even if unintentional) was responsible for separating the dark and light sides. Like IMAGINE the angst especially with Virgil and Patton’s relationship and then Remus and Roman probably missing so much time together

Thank you to whoever made this :) I felt like posting some writing tips.

Comments give me LIFE. Sometimes I get inspiration from them too, they really give me even more of an incentive to write than I already have. :D

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1) Author (I still want this lol)

2) Vet

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I’ll tag @rowan-is-a-legal-derp and @castibella-shipper-of-the-lord :D

Five things I wanted to be when I grew up

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Wow would you look at that it’s Me

types of fic writers #2

bullet points: the only thing you write is bullet point fic. or short fic. it’s good writing, it’s just never as long as you want it to be. you envy those who can write 50k epics at the drop of a hat. and they, in turn, envy you.

WIP Central: you last completed a fic in 2009. your folders are full of nameless fics crying out for attention. you cannot open them without a surge of guilt. in spite of this, you open another document, and begin another fic.

word counter broke: this one, you tell yourself, will be a measly 2k. it is not. you watch in creeping horror as the counter climbs first to 5k, then to 11k. you still have six major plot points left to go. the fic is expected to clock at 23k but knowing you, will reach 50k. you have a sequel planned. there is no end in sight.

error 404: I’m writing, you tell people, and you are. you post snippets on your blog. yet your ao3 fic counter is a firm zero. you never post anything. you crave validation. your finger hovers over the new work button. you close the tab.