The Wolf

The Wolf

why did i open the door to the monster that had already torn out my throat twice before? still have the scars but thought if i was capable of change, then so was he, forgetting my worth.

i swallowed his lies and drowned for months without being able to speak of the bites he stole from my soul and spat out in front of me, his blood-stained grin.

and as soon as I wasn’t her, he plunged the knife i gave him into my back, cut the rope and kicked me over the edge of the abyss.

but it’s okay.

I think this time I've finally learned my lesson.

[image id: a four-page comic. it is titled “immortality” after the poem by clare harner (more popularly known as “do not stand at my grave and weep”). the first page shows paleontologists digging up fossils at a dig. it reads, “do not stand at my grave and weep. i am not there. i do not sleep.” page two features several prehistoric creatures living in the wild. not featured but notable, each have modern descendants: horses, cetaceans, horsetail plants, and crocodilians. it reads, “i am a thousand winds that blow. i am the diamond glints on snow. i am the sunlight on ripened grain. i am the gentle autumn rain.” the third page shows archaeopteryx in the treetops and the skies, then a modern museum-goer reading the placard on a fossil display. it reads, “when you awaken in the morning’s hush, i am the swift uplifting rush, of quiet birds in circled flight. i am the soft stars that shine at night. do not stand at my grave and cry.” the fourth page shows a chicken in a field. it reads, “i am not there. i did not die” / end id]

a comic i made in about 15 hours for my school’s comic anthology. the theme was “evolution”

little white lies

Sometimes I wonder if I’m an awful person

No—I am an awful person; I

Tell myself I’m an awful person—my

Parents tell me I’m an awful person 

My friends tell me to get therapy, but

Everybody around away from me—I

Draw in those around me, then

Burn bridges—I need therapy

Lie, lie, lie; just a white lie 

I’m digging myself deeper and deeper 

Lie, lie, lie; oops, another lie

Why does everybody think the best about me? 

Play dumb, sweet smile, sugared compliments

I’d be lying if I said I didn’t enjoy it

So bad everybody thinks I’m good

A masquerade, this charade just keeps going

Let’s play a game, just you and me

Let’s see which fake personality

I’ve chosen to paint myself

Which one is it gonna be?

Lie, lie, lie; just a white lie

I’m trapped in this web I can’t defeat

Lie, lie, lie; oops, another lie

I keep spinning these threads of deceit

Caught in this carousel of illusion—I’m 

Suffocating in delusion—I

Crave the taste of authenticity—but

Truth’s a double edged sword, you see

My world’s unraveling, catastrophe 

Unraveling just like my sanity

Looked into a mirror that fed my vanity

But guess that now that’s gone to insanity

incomplete

Last night, I ate a grapefruit and it 

Tasted like you—bittersweet; 

Cut it in half, let one decay 

Let the other half be incomplete. 

“keep going,” they say, “time will heal,” 

put emotions away to the highest shelf 

and I guess it’s worked for me 

if the point was to lose myself. 

and now it feels like nothing is complete 

not the grapefruit I can no longer find

not your last wish, uttered in final sighs

and certainly not the living you left behind. 

kindred stars

night unveils her jewels at 

your askance, painting each 

star with patient detail; the 

heavens murmur to you and

gift you gossamer wings. 

climbing silken ropes of 

nebulae, delicate in their 

earthen creation, as if you 

are always reaching for 

the cosmos up above. 

You lift earthbound eyes to 

kindred stars—reaching, always

reaching, for a light that I

cannot see, yet—I want 

to see what you reach for. 

From corded aerie to stardust—

the velvet night spinning your 

dreams to eternity’s archive 

holding you in its arms; 

slowly—softly—gently…

coffee and roses

It’s the way your name tastes like

coffee beans and rose petals. 

How your golden hoops, 

Glittering like precious metals, 

Swing with their embedded rhinestones. 

It’s the way you run your tongue 

over your teeth and bite your lip. 

How you prove my arguments wrong, 

But with a playful quip 

As if you don’t know the warm glow in my chest.

It’s the way you invited me to 

That coffee date and we took 

Pictures like a real couple. 

How we folded stars with their colorful look

With those strips of colored paper. 

It’s the way you gifted me 

That jar with our paper stars.  

How the jar’s glass refracts the sun 

And scatters the light across my room 

In dappled spots like komorebi. 

It’s the way I felt when you

Told me I tasted of the 

Lip gloss you wear

How I felt when you said that 

I tasted of your lips. 

It’s the way you hold my heart 

Cradle it oh so gently 

In your hands as if you don’t 

Have the power to crush it 

Into a million tiny pieces. 

It’s the way I know that 

Even if my name on your lips 

Tastes of ecstasy 

You will be

The death of me