Rayday-mayday - I'm An Anxious Mess :') - Tumblr Blog

meiw

Meow?

I’ve had to deal with a devastating issue today; and I feel like us Proshippers need to have a conversation really quickly about something very important.

Drawings of real minors in sexual situations should not be created or posted. Ever.

I’ve made that mistake when I was 12, and it still affects me deeply to the point I call myself a CSEM victim because of my stupid and immature decisions. (Actually, if you knew me when I was Destroyalition, you might’ve seen my vent posts about how bad it affected me when I was younger.)

I understand if you’re a selfshipper and want to show your love to your f/o by drawing you guys in romantic situations, but drawings of real kids in those situations are risky. Sexual drawings of that nature are something we should be warning kids not to draw at all. I don’t want anyone else to feel the same pain and grief and anxiety I felt after learning what I drew was harmful and illegal.

Please, be careful. Don’t let adults draw you in sexual situations. Don’t let yourself make a dumb and immature decision. Please stay safe and be careful.

So Minor Proshippers. Listen up. There’s an alternative that is safe to this called creating OC self inserts. Please use those instead to your hearts content. Make sure they don’t look like you though, and please heal.

I just feel like this needs to be specified to the MAXIMUM. I am dearly sorry to everyone who was as immature as I was, and made the same mistake. Take this as a warning, don’t learn the same way I did. Stay safe.

Currently on DnD TikTok people have been tearing into this guy for saying "something something about rules... Why not allow rape in DnD? It's fiction so let people have fun."

People aren't even bringing up that the problem is that everyone at the DnD table needs to consent. No, they're tearing into the "have fun/fantasy" thing in regards to rape.

Literally just saw one earlier that was all like "you think raping people is fun???" as a response. Which, like, isn't what the commenter said. They never said they found it fun irl as the TikToker was very much implying/taking away from it. At the very most they implied they themselves find it fun in fiction, but that's not the same as irl actual rape.

Not to mention the amount of comments wishing harm on the person who made that original comment.

Either way, here's to hoping that TikTok will stop showing me that discourse on my FYP after saying "not interested" enough times!

Not as far as I'm aware, no

Saw @muwwwsky's cute designs of Anti-chan and Proship-chan here the other day, and just had to draw them. Toxic yuri goes brrrr + I might genuinely start to ship these 2.

Here's the original post from muwwwsky

I also might've changed some of Anti-chan's colors for the sake of a more readable black/white colorscheme, but uh ignore that lol

[ Zoom-in on Proship-chan's phone + Anti-chan's full rant under the cut so yall can read what those things say ]

Idfk what the censored words are either fyi, so feel free to fill in the blanks yourself lmao

I saw people liked my proship chan & anti chan toxic yuri so I drew them again a little :3

Does anyone know a commonly used emoji combo for darkfic/darkship? I need it for potential art-related reasons, and I see multiple different ones when I try to search for the most popular one myself.

If not then I'll prob just use the dead dove emoji combo since I know that one ( dove + coffin emoji ) is fairly commonly/consistently used.

Just going to post this real quick to my blog to ward off a specific type of person rq: I don't support transid.

Never have and never will. Argue with a wall if you want to change my mind cuz you won't atp. I've tried to understand where yall are coming from, but can still find faults in your logic + ways you're genuinely harmful.

[ Rant under the cut about why I don't support transid. Fair warning: It's kind of really long ]

I don't care what justifications you have. If you genuinely feel dysphoria over not being abused, traumatized, disabled, a terrible person, or whatever else, then that's something you take up with a professional.

I am strictly anti-harm, anti-abuse, anti-violence, and just anything that causes harm to anyone at all. Even people I hate.

Transid inherently has a percentage of people in their community that want to transition, and considering that it has identities such as transnazi, transabuser, transgroomed, transPTSD, etc, I just can't support it.

You don't plan to "transition" yourself? Why aren't you calling out people who do? Just idly standing by when your community has a really harmful problem is also contributing to the problem. Your silence is a statement, especially if you're extremely active in a specific community.

Even if you don't support "transition" when it comes to harmful identities, where do you draw the line on what's harmful? I'd like to argue that transautistic is harmful. You cannot transition into being autistic. Full stop. Same with being ADHD, actually, but I won't get into that since I don't know much about ADHD personally.

But even if I don't know much about ADHD, what I can say is that both conditions are abnormalities in the way your brain functions and develops. And with that I mean the way it physically functions. You cannot wish your brain into developing at a different rate than an allistic, nor can you wish it into genuinely reacting differently to certain stimuli, or whatever other differences there are.

You also can't take any type of hormones/meds to change how your brain fundamentally develops, processes external stimuli, and/or processes the chemicals your brain is subjected to.

And just to prove that autistic brains in specific are different from allistic's: Here's a study just to prove my point.

That means that you cannot transition into being autistic no matter what, and attempting to do so will be nothing but pretend. And no, you can't liken this to transphobia. Gender is a social construct, unlike autism + your physical sex is malleable due to your physical sex being determines by what hormones your body produces and/or whatever genes you have (mutated or not.)

Then there's identities such as transnazi and transabuser or whatever. I don't care what dysphoria you have, you shouldn't have the want to harm people, and if you do then fucking seek support and professional help so you don't harm others.

Same goes for any type of transabused, transeatingdissorder, transPTSD or whatever else. Wanting to go through worse trauma is a normal reaction to having been through "mild" or ignored trauma, but actively identifying as having gone through "worse," or worse: actively trying to "transition" ( become more traumatized ) isn't okay, and only causes harm to yourself and others.

And no, bringing up BIID isn't valid either. Them having their limbs removed to cope with their dysphoria is a controversial stance/action even in professional spaces. Usually people with BIID get cognitive behavioral therapy, other types of therapy in general, or similar treatment. At most they'll suggest VR to live without having a limb, or suggest using things like crutches, but that's it.

Professional usually want to avoid a healthy limb being amputated, and similarly you shouldn't jump to "transitioning" if you struggle with any type of actual transid-related dysphoria.

There's also transrace, which I won't speak on too much since I'm very much white, but I can say that, in my humble opinion, it borders a little too close to blackface, yellowface, or whatever else. When it comes to POC wanting to transition into being white, maybe talk to a professional cuz there's most likely some trauma causing that urge.

And no, just because race is a social construct does not mean it falls under the same category as gender. Race is usually based off of physical characteristics that labels you as fx. black, asian, white, whatever.

While gender, on the other hand, is also based off of physical characteristics sometimes, but that isn't everything. Gender is more based on aesthetics you attribute to your identity, and includes abstract concepts such as certain colors (pink/blue fx.) being for girls/boys, glitter being seen as more feminine, while mud and that type of stuff is seen as more masculine etc. It also changes more drastically over time fx. men used to wear skirts/makeup/wigs a while back, but now those things are more so seen as feminine.

Even transage is problematic. Not because of predators or anything. While, yes, that is a problem, I have a different reasoning as to why I think it's problematic. And that's cuz it includes kids truly wanting to be treated as adults, and adults wanting to be treated truly as kids. Sure, adults can be treated as kids to some extent, but kids cannot be treated as adults, or as equals in general by adults, due to the fact that actually being 10, and feeling like you're 10 years old while being idfk 20, are two very different things.

Kids being treated as actual adults can lead to harm on their psyche, which they often cannot fully comprehend due to being younger. You know, since kids don't have enough life experience or impulse control to truly know what they're consenting to, what they're doing, etc.

This doesn't only apply to sexual activities and being in sexual communities, but also in regards to viewing violence, having adult responsibilities, etc.

Either way, If the plurality community, the agere community, and autistic community can understand this, then you should too. I'm mentioning autistic people due to the fact some autistic people are often seen, if not outright are, mentally less mature in some cases. But even then, we still shouldn't be outright treated as kids since we're still adults, and if we interact inappropriately with kids, then we shouldn't be excused either due to being "mentally younger."

Sorry if I was incoherent during this rant. I just wanted to shout into the void about my stance on this while also warding off transid people. Cuz honestly? Seeing people support transid frustrates me due to all the harmful things mentioned above.

Glad to hear you're doing good lol

Hey. I think you shipping Steve x Stan is pretty based ngl. Hope you're doing good. Okay that's it byeeeee

thank you broski 💪💪💪🔥🔥🔥 i am doing really good honestly!! better than i have been in.. i think years? yeah!!! :>>

You know, I just realized that part of the reason I just, like, randomly send people positive asks and/or randomly draw people stuff is part of my liking to getting reactions out of people.

Like, usually I prefer to mildly terrify people in videogames ( in a playful manner. It's not fun for me if they're genuinely having a bad time. ) Like hunting people down in Minecraft with an OP weapon or something.

But yeah, it just dawned on me that me doing random positive stuff for people is a different side of the same coin. Or however the saying goes. I'm sure yall know what I mean.

Idk I just get this sense of joy from either method of Reaction Harvesting™ lol

proship-chan x antis-chan doodle....waow...

i saw these super cute designs for anthropomorphized versions of the proship and anti ship emojis by tumblrr userj muwwsky and i just had to draw them, they're so cute. and i didn't know how to draw an ampersand but it's fine

post with the designs here. check it out ifs you haven't yet,

Tumblr

hesu :3 // 🍖🌈

Antis chan & proship chan (🥞💫x🍖🌈)

and here's two more quick rooodles i did. fot fun

^ i love this stupid ass anime style i do it every chance i get sowwy. and literally right after i finished i realized the anatomical mistake in the arm..sigh...goodnight m.......im too lazy to fix it right so you just get a bad red. fixer over it

You. You understood my vision. If the small amount of projection in Anti-chan's rant wasn't enough of a hint.

Saw @muwwwsky's cute designs of Anti-chan and Proship-chan here the other day, and just had to draw them. Toxic yuri goes brrrr + I might genuinely start to ship these 2.

Here's the original post from muwwwsky

I also might've changed some of Anti-chan's colors for the sake of a more readable black/white colorscheme, but uh ignore that lol

[ Zoom-in on Proship-chan's phone + Anti-chan's full rant under the cut so yall can read what those things say ]

Idfk what the censored words are either fyi, so feel free to fill in the blanks yourself lmao

The designs are just so good, how could I not wanna draw your designs??? Glad you like it, though!

Saw @muwwwsky's cute designs of Anti-chan and Proship-chan here the other day, and just had to draw them. Toxic yuri goes brrrr + I might genuinely start to ship these 2.

Here's the original post from muwwwsky

I also might've changed some of Anti-chan's colors for the sake of a more readable black/white colorscheme, but uh ignore that lol

[ Zoom-in on Proship-chan's phone + Anti-chan's full rant under the cut so yall can read what those things say ]

Idfk what the censored words are either fyi, so feel free to fill in the blanks yourself lmao

Saw @muwwwsky's cute designs of Anti-chan and Proship-chan here the other day, and just had to draw them. Toxic yuri goes brrrr + I might genuinely start to ship these 2.

Here's the original post from muwwwsky

I also might've changed some of Anti-chan's colors for the sake of a more readable black/white colorscheme, but uh ignore that lol

[ Zoom-in on Proship-chan's phone + Anti-chan's full rant under the cut so yall can read what those things say ]

Idfk what the censored words are either fyi, so feel free to fill in the blanks yourself lmao

Chat, I think I might be cooking

Also, I find it so funny that I rendered her head before drawing Proship-Chan an actual body or any hair either

Idk I like drawing faces ig

Just remembered it's Rantaro's birthday ( October 3rd, ) and I just can't bring myself to not post about it, since he's pretty much the first character I've ever officially selfshipped with.

So yeah, happy birthday to the pookie! Love him very much mwuah mwuah <3

Antis chan & proship chan (🥞💫x🍖🌈)

anti was very insistent I tell everyone I love incest.. hey guys you might be surprised to hear… I love incest 👻

These are comments on a post about "immoral porn" and it made me so fucking angry I had to rant here. THIS IS NOT TRUE. Consuming "fuckdd up" content, including sexual content, does NOT corrupt you or numb you to the point you'll seek out worse and worse stuff or suddenly be okay with doing it IRL.

Do you know why people say this? Where it comes from? FUCKING TED BUNDY saying that "hardcore pornography" was the reason he killed women. SERIOUSLY. Obviously HE WAS LYING!!! He was a lying ass bitch who wanted to kill people, then once he was caught he invented an excuse that would make him look more sympathetic!!

Porn is not actually a slippery slope into serial killing. People choose to do awful things because of their underlying value system, not because of the art they engage with.

MASTER POST OF PROSHIP RESOURCES!!! <3<3

this is just for links (bc i just have No Way of formatting this properly), so for more in-depth stuffs and credits, head to the google doc, or the carrd !! :3c

Fiction ≠ Reality

Violent media -

Does Media Violence Predict Societal Violence? It Depends on What You Look at and When

Video Game Violence Use Among “Vulnerable” Populations: The Impact of Violent Games on Delinquency and Bullying Among Children with Clinically Elevated Depression or Attention Deficit Symptoms

Extreme metal music and anger processing

On the Morality of Immoral Fiction: Reading Newgate Novels, 1830–1848

How gamers manage aggression: Situating skills in collaborative computer games

Examining desensitization using facial electromyography:Violent videogames, gender, and affective responding

'Bad' video game behavior increases players' moral sensitivity

Fiction and Morality: Investigating the Associations Between Reading Exposure, Empathy, Morality, and Moral Judgment

Comfortably Numb or Just Yet Another Movie? Media Violence Exposure Does Not Reduce Viewer Empathy for Victims of Real Violence Among Primarily Hispanic Viewers

Fantasy Crime: The Criminalisation of Fantasy Material Under Australia's Child Abuse Material Legislation

Being able to distinguish fiction from reality -

Effects of context on judgments concerning the reality status of novel entities

Children’s Causal Learning from Fiction: Assessing the Proximity Between Real and Fictional Worlds

Reality/Fiction Distinction and Fiction/Fiction Distinction during Sentence Comprehension

Reality = Relevance? Insights from Spontaneous Modulations of the Brain’s Default Network when Telling Apart Reality from Fiction

How does the brain tell the real from imagined?

Meeting George Bush versus Meeting Cinderella: The Neural Response When Telling Apart What is Real from What is Fictional in the Context of Our Reality

loli/shota/kodocon -

If I like lolicon, does it mean I’m a pedophile? A therapist’s view

Virtual Child Pornography, Human Trafficking and Japanese Law: Pop Culture, Harm and Legal Restrains

Lolicon: The Reality of ‘Virtual Child Pornography’ in Japan

Report: cartoon paedophilia harmless

‘The Lolicon Guy:’ Some Observations on Researching Unpopular Topics in Japan

Robot Ghosts And Wired Dreams Japanese Science Fiction From Origins To Anime [pg 227-228]

Australia's "child abuse material' legislation, internet regulation and the juridification of the imaginationjuridification of the imagination [pg 14-15]

Multiple Orientations as Animating Misdelivery: Theoretical Considerations on Sexuality Attracted to Nijigen (Two-Dimensional) Objects

Positive Impact on Mental Health

Art therapy -

The effectiveness of art therapy for anxiety in adults: A systematic review of randomised and non-randomised controlled trials

Efficacy of Art Therapy in Individuals With Personality Disorders Cluster B/C: A Randomized Controlled Trial

Effectiveness of Art Therapy With Adult Clients in 2018 - What Progress Has Been Made?

Benefits of Art Therapy in People Diagnosed With Personality Disorders: A Quantitative Survey

The Effectiveness of Art Therapy in the Treatment of Traumatized Adults: A Systematic Review on Art Therapy and Trauma

The clinical effectiveness and current practice of art therapy for trauma

Writing therapy -

Optimizing the perceived benefits and health outcomes of writing about traumatic life events

Expressive writing and post-traumatic stress disorder: Effects on trauma symptoms, mood states, and cortisol reactivity

Focused expressive writing as self-help for stress and trauma

Putting Stress into Words: The Impact of Writing on Physiological, Absentee, and Self-Reported Emotional Well-Being Measures

The writing cure: How expressive writing promotes health and emotional well-being

Effects of Writing About Traumatic Experiences: The Necessity for Narrative Structuring

Scriptotherapy: The effects of writing about traumatic events

Emotional and physical benefits of expressive writing

Emotional and Cognitive Processing in Sexual Assault Survivors' Narratives

Finding happiness in negative emotions: An experimental test of a novel expressive writing paradigm

An everyday activity as treatment for depression: The benefits of expressive writing for people diagnosed with major depressive disorder

Writing about emotional experiences as a therapeutic process

Effects of expressive writing on sexual dysfunction, depression, and PTSD in women with a history of childhood sexual abuse: Results from a randomized clinical trial

Written Emotional Disclosure: Testing Whether Social Disclosure Matters

Written emotional disclosure: A controlled study of the benefits of expressive writing homework in outpatient psychotherapy

Misc -

Emotional disclosure about traumas and its relation to health: Effects of previous disclosure and trauma severity

Treating complex trauma in adolescents: A phase-based integrative approach for play therapists

Emotional expression and physical health: Revising traumatic memories or fostering self-regulation?

Disclosure of Sexual Victimization: The Effects of Pennebaker's Emotional Disclosure Paradigm on Physical and Psychological Distress

Kink/Porn/Fantasies

Sexual fantasies -

A Critical Microethnographic Examination of Power Exchange, Role Idenity and Agency with Black BDSM Practitioners

Women's Rape Fantasies: An Empirical Evaluation of the Major Explanations

History, culture and practice of puppy play

What Exactly Is an Unusual Sexual Fantasy?

The Psychology of Kink: a Survey Study into the Relationships of Trauma and Attachment Style with BDSM Interests

Punishing Sexual Fantasy

Women's Erotic Rape Fantasies

Sexual Fantasy and Adult Attunement: Differentiating Preying from Playing

What Is So Appealing About Being Spanked, Flogged, Dominated, or Restrained? Answers from Practitioners of Sexual Masochism/Submission

Dark Fantasies, Part 1 - With Dr. Ian Kerner

Why Do Women Have Rape Fantasies

The 7 Most Common Sexual Fantasies and What to Do About Them

Sexual Fantasies

Pornography -

The Effects of Exposure to Virtual Child Pornography on Viewer Cognitions and Attitudes Toward Deviant Sexual Behavior

American Identities and Consumption of Japanese Homoerotica

The differentiation between consumers of hentai pornography and human pornography

Pornography Use and Holistic Sexual Functioning: A Systematic Review of Recent Research

Claiming Public Health Crisis to Regulate Sexual Outlets: A Critique of the State of Utah's Declaration on Pornography

Pornography and Sexual Dysfunction: Is There Any Relationship?

Reading and Living Yaoi: Male-Male Fantasy Narratives as Women's Sexual Subculture in Japan

Women's Consumption of Pornograpy: Pleasure, Contestation, and Empowerment

Pornography and Sexual Violence

The Sunny Side of Smut

Other -

Fantasy Sexual Material Use by People with Attractions to Children

Fictosexuality, Fictoromance, and Fictophilia: A Qualitative Study of Love and Desire for Fictional Characters

Exploring the Ownership of Child-Like Sex Dolls

Are Sex and Pornograpy Addiction Valid Disorders? Adding a Leisure Science Perspecive to the Sexological Critique

Littles: Affects and Aesthetics in Sexual Age-Play

An Exploratory Study of a New Kink Activity: "Pup Play"

Jaws Effect

The Jaws Effect: How movie narratives are used to influence policy responses to shark bites in Western Australia

The Shark Attacks That Were the Inspiration for Jaws

The Great White Hope (written by Peter Benchley, writer of Jaws)

The Jaws Myth [not a study BUT is an interesting read and provides some links to articles and studies]

Slenderman Stabbings

Out Came the Girls: Adolescent Girlhood, the Occult, and the Slender Man Phenomenon

Jury in Slender Man case finds Anissa Weier was mentally ill, will not go to prison

2nd teen in 'Slender Man' stabbing case to remain in institutional care for 40 years

Negative effects of online harassment

How stressful is online victimization? Effects of victim's personality and properties of the incident

Prevalence, Psychological Impact, and Coping of Cyberbully Victims Among College Students

Offline Consequences of Online Victimization

The Relative Importance of Online Victimization in Understanding Depression, Delinquency, and Substance Use

Internet trolling and everyday sadism: Parallel effects on pain perception and moral judgement

The MAD Model of Moral Contagion: The Role of Motivation, Attention, and Design in the Spread of Moralized Content Online

Morally Motivated Networked Harassment as Normative Reinforcement

When Online Harassment is Perceived as Justified

Violence on Reddit Support Forums Unique to r/NoFap

"It Makes Me, A Minor, Uncomfortable" Media and Morality in Anti-Shippers' Policing of Online Fandom

I love you, freaks!

I love you, hypersexuals!

I love you, furries!

I love you, proshippers!

I love you, paraphiles!

I love, love, love you!

Keep being weird! Don't let others tell you otherwise!

When you see it, REBLOG IT.

Depression Hotline: 1-630-482-9696

Suicide Hotline: 1-800-784-8433

LifeLine: 1-800-273-8255

Trevor Project: 1-866-488-7386

Sexuality Support: 1-800-246-7743

Eating Disorders Hotline: 1-847-831-3438

Rape and Sexual Assault: 1-800-656-4673

Grief Support: 1-650-321-5272

Runaway: 1-800-843-5200, 1-800-843-5678, 1-800-621-4000

Exhale: After Abortion Hotline/Pro-Voice: 1-866-4394253

If you ever want to talk: My Tumblr ask is always open.

When you see a slide on TikTok about proship/antiship arguments, and it genuinely took you 10+ slides + going into the comments to realize they were an antishipper.

Like, bestie was not making any points, and I only realized they might be antiship when they used those cutesy emojis + borderline UwU-speak-esque language for a "proship argument."

Sorry I mashed my Barbie's together in a way you dislike.

Hey, let's stop the narrative that proshippers are shipping certain ships to cope with sexual abuse. That is the case for some people, but not all of us. No one needs to have been abused and traumatized to "be allowed" to enjoy things in fiction.

This is not only the philosophy of Antis "giving proship passes," but many proshippers keep mentioning it to the point that I'm convinced they feel the same.

"Proship" is about letting everyone ship and write whatever fictional pairings they want, not allowing it only if it is a trauma response.