recycledchicken - RecycledChicken
RecycledChicken

Hello! I write stuff over at https://archiveofourown.org/users/RecycledChicken  My writing tag is #RecycledWrites :)I'm still figuring Tumblr out- bear with! :)

228 posts

A Historic Moment In Gaming

A Historic Moment in Gaming

Part 1 (You are here!) / Part 2 / Part 3 

(https://archiveofourown.org/works/40814790)

Summary: The museum is restless and the exhibits have gone stir crazy. Larry Daley can only think of one solution; buy a Wii.

“I’m not sure I can take this anymore.”

 ”Larry, I’m a Pharaoh, not a therapist.”

“I-I know that.” Larry looked up. The floor in ‘The Tomb of Ahkmenrah’ exhibit was cold and hard, but that didn’t stop Larry from sitting on it. He was glued to the corner of the room, like some misbehaving child who had been put in time-out.  

The nightguard had been sulking in the room nearly all night. It was a miracle the Anubis guards hadn't have driven him out by now for pestering their king. But, in all honesty, they didn't have the heart too. Well, they didn't have hearts anyway due to them being statues and all. But I digress.  

Larry looked like a husk of a man, a pathetic excuse of a nightguard. His hand clutched his chin so tightly that you would have thought he was trying to cling onto his sanity.  His face was so tense that the amount of stress lines was multiplying by the minute- soon he’d look like a drawing with sketchy hatch shading.  

In contrast, Ahkmenrah was perched on top of his sarcophagus. His chin was pointed upwards in that typical ‘Upper-class person conversing with the Lower-class’ look. He looked as though he was trying to balance something on his nose. His legs were joined together, his hand clasped on top of his thigh.  

He was the epitome of a graceful royal with his rich garments shining under the overhead lights. Or perhaps his grandiose appearance was amplified because the only other person he had for comparison at that moment was a sad little nightguard.  

Larry’s eyebrows knitted together, as if they would combine into a pair of wings and fly off his face.  

"Can't a guy just, I don't know, share his thoughts and feelings to another guy? Have a little heart to heart?"  

"I am certainly not opposed to any of that." Ahkmenrah stated calmly. “It's just that,” His gaze softened, and his shoulders slumped a little. “I can’t provide any satisfying solution to your problem.”  

Larry's chin sank further into his hand. "I know, buddy, I'm sorry. It's just," His eyes closed in exasperation, "I can't deal with the noise, the arguments, the straight up chaos!"  

“I suppose having so many time-periods making contact with one another, it can seem quite chaotic.” Ahkmenrah commented thoughtfully.  

“No,” Larry waggled a dismissive finger. “No, you don’t get it. It’s more than that. It’s not just chaotic. No-o. Its chaos. Literal chaos.”  

He began to preform various mocking voices and incomprehensible hand gestures. "'Oh, lets ride our RC car over multiple sacred artefacts.' 'Let's try and copy that wrestling video Nicky showed us!' 'No! Let's nit-pick everyone else's actions and then start an argument and then run around and then-!!'"  

"Larry."  

The night guard turned his head. During his ramblings, Ahkmenrah had hopped off his coffin and sat himself on the floor beside him.  

Larry sighed.  

“Perhaps,” Ahkmenrah paused for a moment. “They are bored.”  

Larry considered this. This was a reasonable suggestion. But he lost the definition of 'reasonable' when Teddy Roosevelt and peeing monkeys had taken over his life.  

Ahkmenrah continued. “And this boredom may have caused this unruly behaviour.”  

Larry shook his head in disbelief. "Bored? How can any of the exhibits be bored? They live next to-" He waved his hand. "Um, lions and stuff! They can- they can go from Egypt and then into a jungle in like, the span of two seconds!"  

He sighed in frustration as well as defeat. "How can they be bored?" he said in a croaky, tired tone.  

“Fifty-five years.”  

Larry scrunched his face. “I’m not old.”  

The Pharaoh smiled softly. "No, but that is the amount of time this museum has been blessed with life."  

He shimmied closer to Larry. "This museum may be big, yes. But fifty-five years confined to the same space... one would tire of the same old thing, would they not?"  

Larry looked away before reluctantly nodding. "Yeah, I guess you're right." He fell quiet.  

Looking pleased with himself, Ahkmenrah shuffled along the floor until he was nearly touching shoulders with Larry. He aimed to be a comforting presence, their shoulder contact reminding the nightguard that someone was there for him.  

The overhead lights continued to glow. Ahkmenrah pretended that it was actually the sun lighting the room. He closed his eyes and prepared himself for a content period of silence. . .  

“But!!!”  

Ahkmenrah nearly jumped out of his skin. Not that it would have mattered, though. He was used to not having much skin during the day.  

"Look at yourself, Ahk!" Larry continued. Not wanting to disappoint, Ahkmenrah looked at the ancient drawing of himself on his exhibit sign.  

"You were here all that time and look; you turned out fine!"  

“I was caged in my sarcophagus for the majority of it.”  

Now, after this comment, there was a good healthy dose of prolonged eye contact.  

Ahkmenrah blinked.  

Larry winced. Embarrassed, he scratched the bridge of his nose.  

When he first released Ahkmenrah from his grave situation, the Pharaoh had appeared so calm, so regal. But when it came for him to go back in, the mask fell. Un-royal like tears, short breaths and shouting-  

He had gotten a lot better, or that's what Larry wanted to believe.  

Larry attempted to apologise. "Sorry, Ahk, I-"  

"There are endless possibilities, Larry.” A sudden chill filled the air. “But our minds are limited. We can only think of so many." The pharaoh stared into the far distance. He was drawing into himself.  

"Then those possibilities slowly whittle down until you're only left with one option."  

Larry furrowed his eyebrows in a concerned manner.  "And that would be?"  

Ahkmenrah looked him dead in eyes.  

" Scream. "  

Larry abruptly stood up. "Oka-ay," He offered a hand to Ahkmenrah. He hesitantly took it.  

"We need to get out mind off all this bad stuff." Staggering to his feet, the pharaoh nodded in agreement.  

"Yes..."  

Larry pattered Ahkmenrah’s shoulder in comfort. "Something that will get the others to calm down, divert their tiny little attention spans to something else."  

Mouth open, he pondered. Ahkmenrah brushed down his cape absentmindedly.  

“Like, uh, a group activity. Finger painting?” Larry looked at Ahkmenrah for a reaction. Ahkmenrah, however, was still yet to come to.  

“Okay, scratch that. There would probably be paint everywhere. You remember when Nicky brought his art homework over?”  

Ahkmenrah pursed his lips and shivered. “’The Glitter Incident’.”  

“Yep.” Larry shivered as well. “Let's not think about that too much.” he said ominously. He then tapped his chin.  

"We need... need a... we need... we-" Larry snapped his fingers. "We need a Wii!"  

A few moments of silence went by. This seemed to be a recurring theme. Every time Larry wanted peace and quiet, he got noise. But on the rare occasion he actually wanted noise, he got silence.  

The world was a cruel place.    

“Do we...?” Ahkmenrah questioned slowly.  

“Yes, we do! It will solve-” he emphasised the next word in an excited whisper. “Everything.”  

Ahkmenrah scrunched up his nose in disgust. Is this why his father had warned him not to engage with the common people? Because they have ideas like this?  

"I don't think relieving ourselves would help anyone." Ahkmenrah commented. Although he reapplied his dignified person in record time, he could not hide his bemusement. He tried his best though. This may be some modern-day ritual he had yet to come across.  

Larry paused. Why did he feel like a crazy person?  

Realisation hit him like a woolly mammoth accidently falling down the stairs. (He was very familiar with this feeling.)  

He broke out in a grin and chuckled awkwardly.  

"No, no. Not like that. Like that game console, the Wii. You know the Wii?" he explained. The pharaoh squinted his eyes in confusion.    

"You know, made by those guys who made Mario and stuff? Oh, come on, surely you know about jumping on mushrooms and saving princesses?"  

Ahkmenrah pursed his lip. “I don't think you need a therapist anymore.”  

Now it was Larry's turn to look confused. Ahkmenrah continued.  

"I think you need a doctor. You have gone quite mad."    

(Thank you for reading!!!! I recently watched Secret Of The Tomb and have gotten back into the series! I really like comedy writing so I hope you enjoy this. I also don’t really understand how Tumblr works still so if I have done something wrong please tell me/ give me advice!)

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More Posts from Recycledchicken

6 years ago

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“Ahem.” Both mechs looked up. Sari was being lifted with a bright pink ray by Ratchet, who was rocking some sunglasses which had been created by Bulkhead. She seemed perfectly okay despite the fact she was now coughing because she had the giggles.

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"I have my own sort of headlight." She turned around and the key around her neck was suddenly alight, the metal tugging at the chain towards the water.

Part 1 / Part 2 (coming soon)


Tags :
6 years ago

I call him, Bananowl.

I Call Him, Bananowl.
I Call Him, Bananowl.
I Call Him, Bananowl.

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Catchphrase: Bananna.

Favourite food: The Energon of his enemies.

Best friend: Bananna

He stole my chin so I made this.

2 years ago

BRUH THE SALAD KILLED ME

I need new batteries father.

What? Already? But I gave you some five minutes ago!

Listen, I love you like a son. You're above Nicky on the 'Son Leaderboard'. But I can't even look you in the eye right now- and not just because I'd get blinded by the light!

well, actually, because you're out of batteries i wouldn't- buts that's beside the point!

Ah, jeez, just uh.. just eat your battery salad and then we can get back to work.

I Need New Batteries Father.

Tags :
6 years ago

I love Skyfire so much >:[