Larry Daley - Tumblr Posts

The teachers would be so damn confused😫

Got an idea where since Nick gets like an assignment or something where he has to draw his family and since the museum is basically his family at this point his picture looks like this:

And when he shows it to everybody at the museum they're all just like:

I'm so happy to have gained this knowledge😫😫

Full NATM Craig context

In the special features of the Secret of the Tomb Blu Ray disc, there is a short "documentary" called A day in the Afterlife. There, we meet a mummy named Craig, someone "Ahkmenrah" went to college with (Ahkmenrah plays himself in the movies apparently).

Ahkmenrah decided to do Craig a solid and let him be in the Secret of the Tomb movie through the powers of nepotism. But everyone fucking hates Craig because he's obtuse, has an inflated sense of self worth, and doesn't listen to people.

Craig has poor on set etiquette (answering a phone while they're trying to film). He tries to get Ben Stiller to start a NATM Spin Off series with him focused on Craig (he tries to network with everyone to get his, frankly, bad ideas on TV). He made Shawn Levy no longer believe that all ideas have some kind of worth or merit to them.

Ahk managed to trick him into leaving the film early, but he didn't have the heart to tell Craig that he sucked.

Also, I have no idea who plays Craig. He almost sounds like Owen Wilson without a Southern accent, but he also kinda sounds like Ryan Reynolds??? But I know for a fact that that CAN'T be Ryan Reynolds, how ridiculous would that be?? 💀💀 I love the idea of Owen Wilson deciding to play some random mummy character for DVD extras, though.

But who knows who plays Craig? Because there is no credit to the person playing him ANYWHERE so-

Hope y'all are happy to know who Craig is 💀

A Historic Moment in Gaming

Part 1 (You are here!) / Part 2 / Part 3 

(https://archiveofourown.org/works/40814790)

Summary: The museum is restless and the exhibits have gone stir crazy. Larry Daley can only think of one solution; buy a Wii.

“I’m not sure I can take this anymore.”

 ”Larry, I’m a Pharaoh, not a therapist.”

“I-I know that.” Larry looked up. The floor in ‘The Tomb of Ahkmenrah’ exhibit was cold and hard, but that didn’t stop Larry from sitting on it. He was glued to the corner of the room, like some misbehaving child who had been put in time-out.  

The nightguard had been sulking in the room nearly all night. It was a miracle the Anubis guards hadn't have driven him out by now for pestering their king. But, in all honesty, they didn't have the heart too. Well, they didn't have hearts anyway due to them being statues and all. But I digress.  

Larry looked like a husk of a man, a pathetic excuse of a nightguard. His hand clutched his chin so tightly that you would have thought he was trying to cling onto his sanity.  His face was so tense that the amount of stress lines was multiplying by the minute- soon he’d look like a drawing with sketchy hatch shading.  

In contrast, Ahkmenrah was perched on top of his sarcophagus. His chin was pointed upwards in that typical ‘Upper-class person conversing with the Lower-class’ look. He looked as though he was trying to balance something on his nose. His legs were joined together, his hand clasped on top of his thigh.  

He was the epitome of a graceful royal with his rich garments shining under the overhead lights. Or perhaps his grandiose appearance was amplified because the only other person he had for comparison at that moment was a sad little nightguard.  

Larry’s eyebrows knitted together, as if they would combine into a pair of wings and fly off his face.  

"Can't a guy just, I don't know, share his thoughts and feelings to another guy? Have a little heart to heart?"  

"I am certainly not opposed to any of that." Ahkmenrah stated calmly. “It's just that,” His gaze softened, and his shoulders slumped a little. “I can’t provide any satisfying solution to your problem.”  

Larry's chin sank further into his hand. "I know, buddy, I'm sorry. It's just," His eyes closed in exasperation, "I can't deal with the noise, the arguments, the straight up chaos!"  

“I suppose having so many time-periods making contact with one another, it can seem quite chaotic.” Ahkmenrah commented thoughtfully.  

“No,” Larry waggled a dismissive finger. “No, you don’t get it. It’s more than that. It’s not just chaotic. No-o. Its chaos. Literal chaos.”  

He began to preform various mocking voices and incomprehensible hand gestures. "'Oh, lets ride our RC car over multiple sacred artefacts.' 'Let's try and copy that wrestling video Nicky showed us!' 'No! Let's nit-pick everyone else's actions and then start an argument and then run around and then-!!'"  

"Larry."  

The night guard turned his head. During his ramblings, Ahkmenrah had hopped off his coffin and sat himself on the floor beside him.  

Larry sighed.  

“Perhaps,” Ahkmenrah paused for a moment. “They are bored.”  

Larry considered this. This was a reasonable suggestion. But he lost the definition of 'reasonable' when Teddy Roosevelt and peeing monkeys had taken over his life.  

Ahkmenrah continued. “And this boredom may have caused this unruly behaviour.”  

Larry shook his head in disbelief. "Bored? How can any of the exhibits be bored? They live next to-" He waved his hand. "Um, lions and stuff! They can- they can go from Egypt and then into a jungle in like, the span of two seconds!"  

He sighed in frustration as well as defeat. "How can they be bored?" he said in a croaky, tired tone.  

“Fifty-five years.”  

Larry scrunched his face. “I’m not old.”  

The Pharaoh smiled softly. "No, but that is the amount of time this museum has been blessed with life."  

He shimmied closer to Larry. "This museum may be big, yes. But fifty-five years confined to the same space... one would tire of the same old thing, would they not?"  

Larry looked away before reluctantly nodding. "Yeah, I guess you're right." He fell quiet.  

Looking pleased with himself, Ahkmenrah shuffled along the floor until he was nearly touching shoulders with Larry. He aimed to be a comforting presence, their shoulder contact reminding the nightguard that someone was there for him.  

The overhead lights continued to glow. Ahkmenrah pretended that it was actually the sun lighting the room. He closed his eyes and prepared himself for a content period of silence. . .  

“But!!!”  

Ahkmenrah nearly jumped out of his skin. Not that it would have mattered, though. He was used to not having much skin during the day.  

"Look at yourself, Ahk!" Larry continued. Not wanting to disappoint, Ahkmenrah looked at the ancient drawing of himself on his exhibit sign.  

"You were here all that time and look; you turned out fine!"  

“I was caged in my sarcophagus for the majority of it.”  

Now, after this comment, there was a good healthy dose of prolonged eye contact.  

Ahkmenrah blinked.  

Larry winced. Embarrassed, he scratched the bridge of his nose.  

When he first released Ahkmenrah from his grave situation, the Pharaoh had appeared so calm, so regal. But when it came for him to go back in, the mask fell. Un-royal like tears, short breaths and shouting-  

He had gotten a lot better, or that's what Larry wanted to believe.  

Larry attempted to apologise. "Sorry, Ahk, I-"  

"There are endless possibilities, Larry.” A sudden chill filled the air. “But our minds are limited. We can only think of so many." The pharaoh stared into the far distance. He was drawing into himself.  

"Then those possibilities slowly whittle down until you're only left with one option."  

Larry furrowed his eyebrows in a concerned manner.  "And that would be?"  

Ahkmenrah looked him dead in eyes.  

" Scream. "  

Larry abruptly stood up. "Oka-ay," He offered a hand to Ahkmenrah. He hesitantly took it.  

"We need to get out mind off all this bad stuff." Staggering to his feet, the pharaoh nodded in agreement.  

"Yes..."  

Larry pattered Ahkmenrah’s shoulder in comfort. "Something that will get the others to calm down, divert their tiny little attention spans to something else."  

Mouth open, he pondered. Ahkmenrah brushed down his cape absentmindedly.  

“Like, uh, a group activity. Finger painting?” Larry looked at Ahkmenrah for a reaction. Ahkmenrah, however, was still yet to come to.  

“Okay, scratch that. There would probably be paint everywhere. You remember when Nicky brought his art homework over?”  

Ahkmenrah pursed his lips and shivered. “’The Glitter Incident’.”  

“Yep.” Larry shivered as well. “Let's not think about that too much.” he said ominously. He then tapped his chin.  

"We need... need a... we need... we-" Larry snapped his fingers. "We need a Wii!"  

A few moments of silence went by. This seemed to be a recurring theme. Every time Larry wanted peace and quiet, he got noise. But on the rare occasion he actually wanted noise, he got silence.  

The world was a cruel place.    

“Do we...?” Ahkmenrah questioned slowly.  

“Yes, we do! It will solve-” he emphasised the next word in an excited whisper. “Everything.”  

Ahkmenrah scrunched up his nose in disgust. Is this why his father had warned him not to engage with the common people? Because they have ideas like this?  

"I don't think relieving ourselves would help anyone." Ahkmenrah commented. Although he reapplied his dignified person in record time, he could not hide his bemusement. He tried his best though. This may be some modern-day ritual he had yet to come across.  

Larry paused. Why did he feel like a crazy person?  

Realisation hit him like a woolly mammoth accidently falling down the stairs. (He was very familiar with this feeling.)  

He broke out in a grin and chuckled awkwardly.  

"No, no. Not like that. Like that game console, the Wii. You know the Wii?" he explained. The pharaoh squinted his eyes in confusion.    

"You know, made by those guys who made Mario and stuff? Oh, come on, surely you know about jumping on mushrooms and saving princesses?"  

Ahkmenrah pursed his lip. “I don't think you need a therapist anymore.”  

Now it was Larry's turn to look confused. Ahkmenrah continued.  

"I think you need a doctor. You have gone quite mad."    

(Thank you for reading!!!! I recently watched Secret Of The Tomb and have gotten back into the series! I really like comedy writing so I hope you enjoy this. I also don’t really understand how Tumblr works still so if I have done something wrong please tell me/ give me advice!)

BRUH THE SALAD KILLED ME

I need new batteries father.

What? Already? But I gave you some five minutes ago!

Listen, I love you like a son. You're above Nicky on the 'Son Leaderboard'. But I can't even look you in the eye right now- and not just because I'd get blinded by the light!

well, actually, because you're out of batteries i wouldn't- buts that's beside the point!

Ah, jeez, just uh.. just eat your battery salad and then we can get back to work.

A Historic Moment in Gaming (Chapter 2)

Part 1 / Part 2 (You are here!) / Part 3 

(https://archiveofourown.org/works/40814790/chapters/102965613#workskin)

Summary: The museum is restless and the exhibits have gone stir crazy. Larry Daley can only think of one solution; buy a Wii.

A buzz had spread across the museum.    

No, I am not referring to that one time where a hive was discovered in the Western Diorama and the miniature cowboys attempted to tame the swarm as if they were flying fuzzy horses.

I guess you can say they weren't very friendly neigh-buzz.

Neither am I talking about the time where a fire-drill happened and most of the exhibits treated the buzzing alarm as the end of the world.  

Since the night of Larry’s break-down, rumours had spread from exhibit to exhibit; they all knew he had come up with some sort of solution to stop everyone causing anarchy around the museum, but what the solution was they didn’t know.  

So, when Larry emerged from the security office carrying a large brown box, his closest friends were eagerly waiting for him at the front desk.  

“What have you got in that there box, sonny?” Theodore Roosevelt asked. He was standing next to Sacajawea, their hands interlocked.  

Larry momentarily frowned. Two wax figures could find love, but he couldn’t?  

“Well,” Larry shook off his divorced-dad mentality and slipped into his previous salesman identity that he had used during his television appearances.

“It is something that is going to change your life.” he grinned.

Sacajawea’s eyes widened. “Is it new clothes so we don’t have to wear the same thing every night?” she asked hopefully.  

Larry’s grin faltered for a split second. “Uh, no.”  

Octavius padded to the edge of the information desk and stared up. “You have discovered a new tablet that allows us to roam around during the day?”  

“Still no.” Larry’s smile had become forced. When he saw Teddy about to open his mouth, Larry quickly interrupted him.

“But!” he shouted a little too brash. Teddy shut his mouth, slightly offended.  

Larry internally sighed. He didn’t want to disappoint them even more. Besides, the Wii would still impress them, right? You could play ‘Animal Crossing’ and ‘Kirby’s Adventure’ on that thing. Or so he was told. Nicky was more of a gamer than him. Although, not to toot his own horn or anything, but Larry was the Wii Sports Tennis Champion of the family.

Well, that was a self-proclaimed title.

Larry added some enthusiasm to his voice as he lowered the box onto the desk.  

“It's actually a-”  

“Woah there, Gigantor!”    

Larry swiftly lifted the box back into the air. Under the shadow of the box, Jedediah stood protectively in front of Octavius. His hands threateningly hovered over his gun holders.

“Watch where you’re puttin’ stuff!” the cowboy miniature hollered. “You nearly flattened Octavius.”

He paused before adding. “And me.”  

Larry put the box onto the floor and then held up his hands. “Sorry, Jed. Didn't, uh, see you there.”  

“That's what all you big people say!” Jedediah huffed and pointed a gloved finger.  “And what do you need a box for, anyhow? I was promised humiliation at his finest!”

“Humiliation?” Larry asked. He blinked and looked around. No one else seemed surprised at what was just said.  

“Uh, okay. Well,” Larry said. “I don’t know who promised you that. But you’re in for a surprise, because inside that box is a-”

Octavius smirked and nudged Jedediah. “Doesn’t he mean, ‘Urine’ for a surprise?”  

“Whoo!” the two miniatures laughed and high-fived each other.  

“Phew, awh’ man,” Jedediah wiped a tear from his eye. “Sometimes it scares me, y’know? - How much ofa’ comedic genius I am.”

Octavius leaned towards him. “But that was my joke.” Jedediah waved a dismissive hand.

“Yeah, well, we’re a team. All your ideas are technically mine.”

Larry raised his hands in desperation. “What is going on?”

“Oh! Oh!” Jedediah whispered loudly to Octavius. “Bet he’s going to do it into the box!” They both giggled like high-school bullies. Larry looked around for an explanation, but none was offered.

“Does anyone want to, I don’t know, kindly explain what is going on? Is this some sort of funny inside joke? A little inside joke that the nightguard isn’t allowed to know?” Larry asked.

“Why,” Ahkmenrah said calmly, pouting his lip and glancing at the ceiling. “I merely said to everyone you were going to present your ‘Wii’ to us.”

“And you explained what a Wii is, right?” Larry interrogated. Ahkmenrah couldn’t meet his eye.

“You explained what a Wii is, right?” Larry repeated in a strained, panicked voice. His mouth was agape. He thought Ahkmenrah was a good-hearted prince. But despite 4,000 years to become wise he had not lost his teenage immaturity.

Oh, Larry would not forget this.

Before Larry could explain himself, Teddy unhooked his arm from Sacajawea and stepped forward.  

“I, for one, find your decision most brave, Lawrence.” He placed a hand on Larry’s shoulder and lowered his voice. “Back in my day, to show my authority, I would hunt and kill the most dangerous animals I could find.”  

He shook his head and chuckled softly. “But I never would’ve had the confidence to relieve myself in front of an audience to affirm my leadership.”  

“Thanks, Teddy, but I'm not-”  

The president had already made his way back to his partner. Sacajawea slipped her hand back into his. He put his mouth to her ear.  

“Must be a modern thing.” he whispered.

“Or maybe he’s finally snapped. People cope with stress in strange ways. And he’s been under a lot of stress.” she whispered back. They both looked at Larry with similar sympathetic expressions. Larry felt a vein bulge on his forehead.  

He took a deep breath, held for five seconds and then let out a slow, loud sigh.    

This was a technique he and Ahkmenrah had taught the Huns and Civil War Mannequins in an attempt to subdue their anger and decrease fights. The Mannequins may not have mouths, but it was the thought that counted. Actually, it greatly distressed them and made them even worse. Larry theorised it was because they realised, they couldn’t breathe. Or talk. Or scream. Even theorising didn’t help the situation as the topic of screaming sent Ahkmenrah into a tizzy.  

Speaking of Huns, Atilla was stood next to Ahkmenrah, watching the amusing situation play out. Lately, he had been very adamant on leaning the English language and would only nudge the pharaoh when he struggled to understand what had just been said. His warrior pride made him a more independent learner.      

“Well, there has been a... misunderstanding.” Larry swallowed. “But what's in here is going to change your-... It's going to stop you guys stop making a mess of the museum.”  

Atilla placed Jedediah and Octavius on each of his shoulders. Larry put the box onto the desk.

Larry let a few seconds go by to build up suspense. This was a technique he used to help sell his inventions when he-  

“Oh, good God, man!” Octavius shouted out impatiently. “Open it up already!”

Thank you for reading! I really enjoyed writing this!

Guess who just got hired! This guy!

I'm in my new- well, it looks really old and dingy but it's new to me- office. Stay positive Larry.

Guy on the phone called me a hotdog?? That's also new. Apparently the exhibits get 'a bit quirky at night'. LOL!

This job is so easy. And so boring. I've been amusing myself by talking into the fan and making myself sound like a robot.

But it can only amuse me for so long.

Wait.

Uhh, hold on-

Where did the dinosuar go?

Don't ask why I made this just take it

Quote taken from @angelofthenight​

Just finished my first Jedtavius fic!

If you are looking for something goofy with fluff then have a look! 😊

I wrote a goofy fic about Ahkmenrah acting as a brother to Nick!

You are not obliged to read it at all, but if you like found family and comfort, have a gander! 😊🤠

I will never make anything this good ever again

Don't ask why I made this just take it

I humbly offer you my Larry Daley from the critically acclaimed Night at Museum film series.

Yes, I’ve been sucked into this fandom.

I have no excuses and no regrets

Tiny parade!

"Okay, who let creepy out of his exhibit?"

I have no excuses and no regrets

im just saying larry daley could survive fnaf but that doesnt mean micheal afton could live a natm

The exhibits aren't the only thing lively at the museum

Damnit, now I wanna watch this movie.

I have no excuses and no regrets