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Ricciardosredbull - Emmy - Tumblr Blog

Lando Norris cooling down after winning the Singapore Grand Prix
Photo Credit: Xian Jun










I have a new addition to my collection â€ïžâđ©č
he can sleep anywhere
champagne coast // ln4



pairing:Â lando norris X reader
word count:Â 19k
warnings:Â cursing and alcohol use
includes:Â friends to lovers, summer!lando, clueless reader and lando, pining, fluff, and a little angst
summary:Â when lando and you spend summer break together you don't expect italy to eventually hold such a special place in your heart... or lando and you go on vacation and everyone keeps thinking you're a couple.
playlist for the fic: spotify | apple music
masterlist
âââ àŒșâàŒ» âââ
It was the Monday before the Belgium Grand Prix when Lando asked â what are you doing for summer break?
The sun had started to set over the coast, its golden reflection rippling across the water and onto the balcony of Landoâs Monaco apartment. The same balcony that the two of you currently resided on, choosing to share the wicker couch instead of one of you sitting in one of the empty chairs.
You were sat sideways on the couch with your legs crossed, your view consisting more of Lando than the picturesque sunset over the sea. A cheap bottle of pink moscato, which was your favorite, was sitting on the table where Lando had his feet propped up.
Heâd always complain about how sweet it was, but then drink more of it than you. In all reality, heâd actually grown to love it because of you, but heâd never tell you that. Heâd only been able to find it at one place in Monaco, so when he knew you were coming to visit he always made sure to have a couple bottles on hand and maybe a bottle for himself when he was missing you.
Your eyes met his as you processed his question. This right now was your summer vacation. He surely knew that, right? âSummer break? I donât have a summer break like you do, Lando.â It was true, you had barely managed to get this week off from work to be able to go to Belgium, let alone have a month off. âI figured me being here for a couple days then going to Belgium would be my vacation.â
A disapproving sigh escapes past his lips as he speaks. âThat is not a vacation.â
âWell it sure as hell beats being stuck at an office in London.â
He downed the remainder of the wine in his glass and fully turned his body towards you. His arm resting across the back of the couch, his fingers nearly touching you. âI think you should come with me on vacation.â
You stifle a groan by taking a drink of your wine. âLando, you know I donât do Ibiza. It's not my kind of place, especially this time of year.â It was a beautiful place no doubt, but the big party scene was not your favorite. And the couple times you had gone with Lando and your shared friend group it was so chaotic and you had a hangover that lasted for what seemed like a week. So noâ Ibiza and you werenât the best of friends.
âWho said anything about Ibiza?â Heâs got a smirk toying at the corners of his lips, you can tell by the way his upper lip twitches slightly. Not that you stare at his lips that much to be able to notice that kind of thing.
âLando Norris not going to Ibiza during his summer break? Should I alert the press? Did you hit your head? Are you running a fever?â You lean forward to check his temperature, but he playfully swatted away your hand with a giggle before you could get close enough. âHave you broken the news to Fewt-â
That smirk had fully developed across his face as he cut you off. âWho said anything about Max?â
Now you really thought that heâd bumped his head or was slightly tipsy already. You cocked an eyebrow at him in question. âWhere are you going then? Especially without Max?â
Lando leaned back, the wicker creaking beneath him, but his eyes were still trained on you. Golden hour had made them even more blue, resembling the crystal blue water that was just a short walk away. âIâm going wherever you want to go.â
âLando.â
âY/N.â Heâs the one to cock an eyebrow now.
âI canât go with you.â
His smirk had turned into a pout and he knew how to work those big blue eyes, especially on you. âWhy not? Wherever you want to goâ we will go. Not many people get that opportunity Y/N.â
You go to take another drink and realize your glass is empty, but before you can reach for the bottle Landoâs already got it in his hands, reaching over slightly to pour you another glass. âWho all is going then if Max isnât going?â
He sets the bottle back down on the table, hesitating for a moment before speaking. You two are close, probably the closest friend he has compared to Max, but he worries that you wonât be up for what heâs about to suggest. âIt would just be me and you.â
You feel your cheeks get hot at his proposal, but you shake it off, blaming it on the wine.
As much as the idea of Lando and you going on a trip together sounds amazing, you just donât think you can make it work. You live a normal life and being able to just go on lavish trips at the drop of a hat is not something you get to experience, no matter how much Lando wants you to or you would like to.
âI would love to Lan, but I don't think I could get the time off again.â Your finger nervously circles the rim of the wine glass as you contemplate even bringing your other reason up. Mainly because you know what his answer will be, but against your better judgment you take another swig of the wine as liquid courage before telling him the embarrassing truth. âI also just canât afford it.â
And without skipping a beat he blurts out. âIâll pay.â Youâre immediately shaking your head no, but before you can verbally deny his offer heâs speaking again âSeriously Y/N. I will pay. Itâs not a big deal.â
Except him paying your way for this trip is a big deal. Just how itâs a big deal everytime you come and visit him in Monaco and he insists that you donât spend a dime while youâre here. Itâs bad enough that you stay at his place, let alone have him pay for your dinner every night. Or how he is always offering to fly you out to races on your free weekends. Or insisting that the random gifts he gives you donât cost that much, like you canât read the designer labels on the boxes or labels.
It makes you feel bad that you canât offer the same back to him. The constant worry that he might think you are using him for his money makes your stomach hurt because itâs the last thing youâd ever do. Heâs one of the most giving and kindest people you know and to be able to call him your best friend is something you treasure. And you truly hope he knows how much you appreciate everything he does for you, but how could he not when you tell him every chance you get.
âLando, really I cannot let you pay for me to go on vacation. Itâs one thing to let me crash at your apartment and for you to get me passes to races, which I appreciate more than you will ever know. But I draw the line at a whole vacation. I donât want to seem like a freeloader who is using you, thatâs honestly the la-â
âOh my god will you just let me spoil you!â Lando had enough of your endless rambling. Your need to always try and decline his gifts or offerings until he convinces you that you are worthy of them drives him crazy. To Lando there isnât a person on Earth who deserves everything and more than you. And the fact that he can afford to give you anything youâd ever want tickles him pink. Hell if it was possible, heâd buy you the whole damn universe, even if you hadnât asked for it.
âI hate that you thinkâ that I would think youâre using me. Never in a million years would I think that. You mean a lot to me Y/N, truly. Youâre one the most important people in my life and you deserve everything and more that I give you. If I thought you were using me, I would not be asking you to go on vacation with me, believe me. I love having you around and with us not seeing each other like we used to, I figured a trip with just the two of us would be nice.â
He pauses for a moment as he scoots a little closer to you on the couch, your legs touching as the glow from the sun envelopes around you two. âNow please donât try and worm your way out of this trip. Iâve missed you so much and if you donât end up going I think youâre just gonna have to move in with me.â
You roll your eyes at his dramatics, but try not to let his heartfelt words get to your head. âHow would I even get the time off work again? Tell them âOh my famous F1 driver best friend wants to take me on a trip. Can I please have some more time off?â I donât think that would work.â
âWell I think it would work. Especially if you add in that Iâm super hot.â
The giggles that come from you lets you know that youâve drank your fair share of wine for the evening. âOh I donât think they would ever tell me no If I added that in.â
âIf they do say no then just quit and Iâll get you a job somehow with McLaren or Quadrant or something. I just really want to go on this trip with you.â
You arenât sure if it's the wine in your system or the fact that you want nothing more right now than to spend a week with Lando in some beautiful country, without a care in the world. But you ignore every responsible and logical part of you and tell him what he wants to hear.
âAlright. So where are we going then?â
His eyes light up and the smile that spreads across his face is comparable to that first win smile. âThatâs all up to you baby.â
Both of your hearts skip a beat at the term of endearment that came from him. His because he canât believe he let it slip and yours because you canât believe he called you that so easily. But you both ignore it and you focus on the one place youâd had on your mind since he mentioned taking a trip.
âItaly?â You suggest with a hopeful smile on your face.
He fills up his glass with the last of the fruit juice like wine and holds it up towards you, your glasses clinking together in a toast. âItaly it is then.â
âââ àŒșâàŒ» âââ
Six days later an email notification pops up on your phone as youâre sitting in McLarenâs hospitality, talking with Landoâs Mom. You glance at who itâs from, not wanting to be rude and get on your phone mid conversation, but when you see your bossâs contact you canât help but open it. âIâm sorry, itâs from work.â Cisca waved you off, the conversation had only consisted of why they couldnât stock better snacks in hospitality, and she knew if work was emailing you on a Sunday it had to be important.
You had emailed them Monday night requesting the time off and when they hadnât responded by Friday you figured they were denying it. Or firing you for requesting more time off while currently being on a vacation. So to be getting this email on a Sunday had you worried, but as your eyes scanned the email you couldnât hold back the excitement. By some higher power unbestowed to you, they had granted you the time off.
âNever seen someone so excited over an email from work.â Cisca teased.
âYeah. Honestly thought I was getting fired, but they approved my time off for the Italy trip Lando and I are taking.â You leaned back in the chair, relief finally washing over you.
âJust the two of you?â Cisca had her suspicions about her sonâs feelings towards you and your feelings towards him. Sheâd secretly hoped the two of you would end up together the first time she met you years ago. She honestly thought you were his girlfriend that day and was surprised when he introduced you as his friend. Then she thought maybe he was hiding your relationship because she had never known her son to bring around a female friend like he had you.
You had attended family dinners, a couple holidays, races, and so many other things that just didnât seem normal to bring a friend to. They had become so accustomed to you being around that when he finally said that he was bringing home his girlfriend for everyone to meet and you didnât walk through the doorâ everyone was a little shell shocked. The relationship didnât last long and she had her theories as to why. To Cisca there was just no way the two of you didnât have feelings for eachother, she could see it plain as day, and it drove her crazy that the two of you didnât see it.
âYeah. At first I thought he was asking me to go to Ibiza again with everyone and you know me, itâs not my thing. But then he said we could go anywhere I wanted and that it was just me and him, so I chose Italy.â You gathered your things, eager to tell Lando the good news before race time. âYou raised a good man, Cisca. I couldnât ask for a better person in my life than him.â
Thereâs a smile on her face as she watches you talk about Lando, how your smile never falters and how that twinkle in your eye seems to get brighter the more you talk about him. âThank you honey. You had better go tell him, hadnât you?â
âIâll be back!â
Thankfully Landoâs not that hard to find, heâs in the garage looking over some data on the monitors with Will when you spot him. You stand back out of the way, waiting until heâs done, but as soon as he turns to walk away youâre racing towards him. Your arms flinging around him from behind and you can feel him tense under you, but when he hears your laughter his muscles relax.
âWhatâs got you in such a good mood?â Lando asks as he turns around to face you, his hands lingering on your hips.
âHmmm. It may have something to do with work approving my time off.â
That same smile from the other night finds its way onto his face and heâs pulling you into his arms, the two of you swaying back and forth as he nuzzles his head into your neck. âI knew they would approve it, it was meant to be.â His voice tickles your neck as he speaks causing a giggle to escape past your lips.
âCanât believe we get to spend a week together in Italy.â You state as he releases you from his grip.
âWouldnât have it any other way.â
You furrow your eyebrows at him, still not sure that he wouldnât rather be going to Ibiza with his friends.âYouâre sure youâre not gonna miss Ibiza?â
His fingers toy with the hem of your shirt as he speaksâ his blue eyes boring into yours. âIâd miss you more if I went.â And there isnât a single ounce of doubt in his words. If he ended up going to Ibiza without you, heâd be at a club wondering what you were doing. Eventually downing one too many shots to try and numb that annoying ache in his chest that forms when you arenât around. The one that even with you around this week, he had felt occasionally at the idea of you not being able to go to Italy.
The idea of him spending his summer break back in England had crossed his mind a couple times, especially if that meant he got to spend time with you. Luckily though fate was on his side today and he wouldnât have to deal with that ache for the foreseeable future.
You can feel the slight blush on your cheeks as you process what Lando had said to you and you pray he doesnât notice it. Just him simply saying heâd miss you if he went to Ibiza should not have you blushing, but here recently it seemed like that was all he could do was make you blush.
A familiar Australian accent hits your ears and around the corner comes Oscar, his hand clamping down on Landoâs shoulder as he comes up behind him. âY/N. Havenât seen you in awhile.â His bunny teeth showing as he flashes you a smile.
Your mouth barely opens to speak before Landoâs speaking for you. âI know. Sheâs been too busy working back in London to come see her favorite person.â
âIâm really such a horrible friend. Iâm so sorry Oscar, I really should make more time to see you. In fact, howâs Australia this time of year? I think I might come visit you.â The playful smirk on your face and Oscarâs laugh does nothing to tell Lando that youâre just joking and like a little kid heâs got his arms crossed across his chest with a slight pout on his face.
âUm. I think Iâm your favorite person Y/N. Plus you canât even go to Australia because we are going to Italy.â
Oscar and you canât help but laugh at Landoâs dramatics, but Oscar wants to tease Lando even further. He knows how his older teammate feels about you, even if Lando wonât give the idea any time of day when Oscar brings it up. Lando had confided in Oscar about his idea to take you on a trip, but Oscar didnât think heâd actually go through with it. âItaly? Whoâs all going? Maybe Lily and I could tag along?â
Landoâs eyes widen at Oscarâs suggestion, mainly because he knows youâd jump at any opportunity to spend time with Lily and this trip was meant to be just for the two of you. âItâs just gonna be me and Y/NâŠâ He trials off, trying to figure out how to nicely tell Oscar that he canât come.
âThere's a month between Singapore and Austin. We should all plan something for then.â You chime in. As much as you would love to spend time with Oscar and Lily, you really want to have this trip just be Lando and you.
Landoâs surprised at you turning down Oscarâs suggestion, but smiles and nods towards Oscar, agreeing with your idea. âYeah that sounds like a good idea.â Oscar states, a small smirk on his face as he eyes the two of you, fully knowing that youâll come back from Italy together. And if you donât Oscar thinks he may have to knock some sense into his teammate.
The driverâs parade was set to start soon, so you tell Oscar youâll see him around and give Lando a hug, knowing you wonât see him again until after the race. âIâll see you later, yeah? Be safe and good luck.â
Landoâs grip on you lingers, not wanting to fully let you go just yet, but when they get the final warning that itâs time to go he reluctantly frees you. A small frown on his face as he heads towards the track and you go back to hospitality.
The two McLaren drivers stood side by side on the flatbed of the moving truck, smiles on their faces as they waved at the fans in the grandstands. âNever seen two friends like you and Y/N go on a trip togetherâ alone.â Oscarâs voice is low, thereâs an interview going on to his left, but heâs loud enough that Lando can hear him.
Lando keeps looking straight forward as he speaks. âDonât know what you mean by that.â
âI think you fully know what I mean.â
Max, who was on the other side of Lando, had been eavesdropping the whole time, and couldnât help but put his two cents in. âIf youâre talking about what I think youâre talking about. I just want to say, do us all a favor and finally tell her how you feel.â
Lando shook his head at the two drivers. You two were just very close best friends, there wasnât anything he needed to admit to you. It was just a trip that two best friends were going on and there was nothing more to itâ right?
âââ àŒșâàŒ» âââ
A week and a half later your plane touches down in Naples and even though the flight from London is only around three hours you want nothing more than to just get to the hotel and relax.
The Uber ride from the airport to the hotel thankfully doesnât take long and you have no issue with sitting down in the lobby of the hotel with all the luggage while Lando checks you two in. You do notice that itâs taking quite a long time for Lando to check in and as you glance up from your phone towards the reception desk you see him talking with the worker and showing her something on his phone. Then with a sigh and a shake of his head he turns on his heel back towards you.
âEverything alright?â You ask.
He slips his phone back into his pocket and grabs his suitcase. âI booked us a two bedroom suite and they told me that all they have available is a one bedroom. Even though I showed them the booking on my phone, someone is already in it. So, Iâll just take the couch and you can have the bed.â
This place was fancy, and Lando had undoubtedly paid a pretty penny for the two nights that you were staying here. You would have thought they would have comped the room or something for their mistake. But by the displeased look on his face it didnât seem they offered him anything but a sorry for the inconvenience.
Even with the hotel screwing up the room, the one you end up with is amazing and as you enter the room your jaw drops slightly at it. You set your bags down and explore the room further, taking in all the beautiful artwork on the walls and the natural light streaming in through the floor to ceiling windows. You enter a door to your left and itâs the bedroom, which is even better than the main room, mainly because of the huge balcony that overlooks the sea.
Thereâs a gentle breeze in the air as you lean against the railing, taking in the view and the hustle and bustle from the surrounding area.
âBeautiful isnât it?â Landoâs voice makes you jump, you were so lost in your own little world you didnât even hear him come out onto the balcony. You nod your head in agreement as he slots himself beside you, mimicking your actions of leaning on the railing. âAnd itâs not even the best part of our trip.â
âYou know you didnât have to get such a nice room, we are only in Naples for two days.â As much as you try not to feel guilty about him paying for all of this, you do.
âAnd what did I say a couple weeks ago?â
A groan emits from you as you remember his words to you in Monaco. âYou said to let you spoil me.â
âExactly. I just want you to enjoy yourself and stop worrying about how much everything costs. We are here to relax and have fun, which means figuring out what we want to do tonight.â
You ponder your endless options and all you really want to do is sit on this balcony and enjoy the view, but your stomach growling tells you maybe dinner would be a good idea first. âWe are in Italyâ how about getting some pizza and then just come back here and relax?â Lando agrees and while youâre freshening up he looks up good pizza places within walking distance.
You two are just about ready to leave when there's a knock on the door, followed by room service!
A confused look is shared between you two, but when Lando looks through the peephole there stands a worker with a room service cart. He opens the door and is greeted with a smile from the employee.
âFrom the hotel as an apology about the room.â The employee hands Lando an ice bucket with a bottle of champagne nestled in it. âHave a nice rest of your stay.â
Lando looks back at you with an amused look on his face as the guy quickly leaves, the wheels of the cart squeaking as he hurries down the hall. âWell, we have something to drink on the balcony later.â Lando states as he sets the bucket down on the coffee table.
âChampagne and pizza? No thanks.â You see thereâs a card attached to the bottle and as you open the envelope and read the words written, your cheeks turn scarlet.
âWhat does it say?â Lando questions, moving to stand behind you so he can read it too. His eyes scan the letter and he soon finds himself in the same state as you. He clears his throat as he steps back, suddenly feeling too close to you at the moment.
to the happy couple,
we are so deeply sorry about the mix up with rooms and we hope you can accept our apologies. weâve sent a bottle of the finest champagne that you can get in naples and have comped any room service you may order during your stay. as always if you need anything please donât hesitate to call the front desk and once again we sincerely apologize for our mistake. we hope you enjoy your stay here and the city of naples.
The letter isnât spoken about, actually what you two were addressed as isnât spoken about, but you both agree that their actions were nice. The walk to the pizza place is quiet, the both of you occasionally pointing out things that you think are interesting or pretty, but both of your minds are preoccupied with being mistaken for a couple. Anyone else would have laughed it off, but clearly not the two of you.
By the time youâre back at the hotel and sat on the balcony with the pizza and champagne your conversation had returned to normal. You teasing Lando about not even drinking the glass he had poured for himself and him complaining about you insisting that you get a pizza that has peppers on it.
âYou know what would make this evening even better?â The pizza is long gone and the two of you are sat admiring the painting in the sky left behind from the sun.
âSome pink moscato?â Thereâs a grin on his face as he says it. If thereâs one thing he knows you love, itâs a glass of pink moscato on a balcony with a view.
You try to hide the smile on your face as you glance over at him, but heâs caught you. âYou know me too well Norris.â
âShouldâve told that employee that we wanted a ten dollar bottle of wine instead of that champagne.â Lando jokes.
âThought you didnât like it? That it was too sweet?â
He shuffles slightly in his seat, fully knowing that youâd caught on to his facade. âI may have grown to love it.â He admits quietly.
Youâd known for a while, but hearing him say it was much more satisfying. âYeah. Kinda figured it out last year when you started drinking more of it than me.â
Nighttime draws near and once you start yawning, so does Lando, and after the fourth round of yawning Lando states that itâs time for bed. The subject the two of you hadnât discussed any further than what was said in the lobby earlier. The guilt started to eat at you as you brushed your teeth, heâd invited you and is paying for everything and he doesnât even get to sleep in a bed? What kind of friend were you?
Lando was making the couch up as you walked out of the bathroom and for this being a luxury hotel that couch looked stiff and seemed to be more for show than actual comfort. He already had a bad back and it looked like sleeping on that couch was going to have him trying to find a chiropractor tomorrow instead of sightseeing. âLan. You take the bed and Iâll sleep on the couch.â
He doesnât even look back at you, still occupied with trying to make the couch somewhat comfortable. âNo. Iâll be fine. You take the bed.â
âLando.â
âY/N.â
âLando, look at me.â You knew he wasnât going to budge with the whole couch thing, so you thought of the next best thing. The two of you sharing the bed. It was plenty big and truly it shouldnât be that big of a deal if you two shared it. You were grown adults and bestfriends, no one should have to sleep on the couch.
His focus tears away from the couch and over to you, whoâs already in bed and under the covers. âLook at how big this bed is.â Your body extends over to the other side trying to show him just how big the bed is. âJust sleep in the bed with me, there is plenty of room.â
Your offer takes him by surprise and he stills for a moment, heâd love nothing more than to climb into that bed right now, but a part of his brain is telling him not to. And heâs about ready to tell you no once again until he makes eye contact with you. Those damn eyes of yours could be used in interrogation rooms across the world, one look into them and heâs crumbling like a poorly built sandcastle. The gentle pat on the empty side of the bed is what flattens the sandcastle and heâs mumbling out an okay before sliding under the sheets next to you.
The two of you donât know what to do for a moment, both still and flat on your backs under the sheets, like if you moved an inch the gremlin under the bed was going to get you. But eventually Lando turns on his side, mumbling out a goodnight as he pulls the comforter closer to him. You take his actions as a sign for you to roll over too and you figured that falling asleep wouldnât be an issue after all the yawning earlier, but you were wrong. You tried counting sheep, tried laying on your back, tried anything you could think of to fall asleep and nothing worked. It wasnât like there was a major time difference between here and London, it was literally only an hour, so unfortunately jet lag could not be to blame.
Lando hadnât moved the whole time and you figured he fell asleep as soon as he turned over, but you were bored and going a little crazy because even though you were tired, you couldnât fall asleep. âLando.â You whispered, but got no response. âLando. Are you awake?â You whisper a little louder this time, but still no response. So with a defeated sigh you roll back over and shut your eyes, praying that this time you can go to sleep. But within a matter of seconds you feel the bed shift and Landoâs voice echoing through the room.
âIâm awake.â
You roll back overâ the two of you now facing each other. âWhy didnât you answer me a minute ago?â
âI was trying to go to sleep myself.â
âOh sorry. Iâll go out to the other room and watch some TV or something.â You barely move an inch before Landoâs got his fingers wrapped around your forearm, gently pulling you back towards him.
âNo, don't leave.â
You can feel your heartbeat quickening as you realize just how close the two of you are. The glow from the moon cascades through the balcony doors allowing you to make out the moles on his face and those pretty long eyelashes of his that make his already breathtaking eyes seem even more beautiful. Sometimes you think he has stars in his eyes from the way that they sparkle. And as the two of you lay here right now, you realize the only reason that the moonlight is flooding into the room is because sheâs looking for her lost stars that have found a home in Landoâs eyes.
âYou got any ideas on how to fall asleep? Iâve tried just about everything in the book.â For some reason you're whispering and you wonder if itâs from how close you are to Landoâs face or how suddenly nervous you are to be this close to Lando.
Heâs silent for a moment, the logical and sane part of him screaming at him to not even suggest what heâs been thinking about ever since climbing under these sheets. The mere idea of it being the thing that had prevented him from being fast asleep by now. But heâs got you at literal fingertips length and he thinks there may not be another opportunity like this again. Soâ he acts with his heart and not his brain.
âCome here.â Heâs moved onto his back with his arm outstretched towards you.
âHuh?â You know exactly what heâs insinuating, but you canât actually believe that he is.
âYou wanted an idea on how to fall asleep and this is my idea. Iâll get you to fall asleep in no time.
âYou think us cuddling is gonna get me to fall asleep?â You definitely hadnât wondered what it would be like to be wrapped up in Landoâs arms before. How it would feel to have his fingertips trance mindless patterns across your skin or have your head on his chest. He was your best friend, which meant those thoughts had never crossed your mindâ right?
He shrugs, trying to hide the nervousness in his demeanor, the mere thought of you denying him right now was enough to have him on the next flight back to Monaco in the morning. He should have never put himself in this situation, but god as soon as he climbed into this bed all he wanted to do was have you wrapped up in his arms.
It had consumed his brain, and then consumed it even more because why was he having this desire to have such a tender moment with his best friend? Though his brain stops spiraling when he feels the bed shift and youâre suddenly tucking yourself into his side, arm slung over his torso, and your head laying on his chest. The same chest that his heart is about ready to beat out of and he prays you canât hear how hard itâs working.
But as you both get settled and Landoâs heartbeat finally mellows out he realizes just how right this feels, like the two of you were matching puzzle pieces. Any other girl he had cuddled with before now seemed to feel wrong because as far as he was concerned, nothing felt better than this. It felt natural and easy and he found himself drawing absent minded patterns on your side where your shirt had bunched up.
Heâd spend the rest of his life here in this moment with you if he could. And when he hears your slight snores something short circuits in his brain and heâs pressing a kiss to the top of your head mumbling out goodnight before heâs out like a light too. The moonlight blanketing over the two of you, who right now look more like lovers than best friends.
âââ àŒșâàŒ» âââ
The next morning youâre already up and ready for the day by the time Lando wakes up and he tries to hide the disappointment of not waking up next to you, already missing the feeling of having you so close. A feeling though nice, he knew it was one that he probably shouldnât be feeling. He asks you if you slept well while heâs getting ready and you tell him yes, not going into very much detail, for your own sake and his.
The day is full of sightseeing and lots of walking, which is something that Lando likes to complain about. You visit Pompeii and a handful of other places for you and Lando to nerd out about and truly be tourists. You eat amazing food that Lando says his trainer will hate him for, but he justifies it with the excuse of being on vacation. Hundreds of pictures were taken, your phones already begging for more storage and it was only the first day of the trip. Lando even went as far as bringing an actual camera, stating that lando.jpg would be revived soon.
But in between the sightseeing, eating, and everything elseâ both of your brains immediately go back to the sleeping arrangements from last night. You both canât stop thinking about it, but no one brings it up, almost like itâs something you should be ashamed of. No one wants to admit how right it felt to be in eachothers arms last night or how both of you probably had the best sleep of your lives.
You didnât want to admit that when you woke up this morning to Lando spooning you, your stomach was doing flips over the realization that you had moved in the middle of the night and he had found his way back to you. So many thoughts and emotions running through your brains, yet you both think itâs better to just act like it's not a big deal.
Night falls once again and Lando crawls into bed next to you. Youâre both absolutely spent after the eventful day youâve had and Lando worries that you wonât need him to fall asleep, but his worries soon dissipate because youâre tucking yourself into his side as soon as heâs gotten himself comfortable. Youâre like a moth to a flameâ the consequences of these actions never even enter your mind as slowly feel yourself drifting off to sleep.
And when morning comes you donât run away when you feel Landoâs arms around you, even with the butterflies making an appearance again. You enjoy your moment alone, the sun shining in through the windows, the sound of the city already alive, and the way Lando looks as he sleeps. It's truly a beautiful morning.
He wakes up not too long after you and thereâs a funny feeling in his chest when he realizes that heâs gotten to wake up with you still in his arms. That you were the first thing he saw when he opened his eyes. It all just feels so natural and right, that once again no words are spoken about this very non-platonic thing that is happening between you two.
âââ àŒșâàŒ» âââ
âWeâve got a little bit a drive ahead of us today.â Lando states as he comes out of the bathroom in nothing but a towel. Water droplets are scattered across his tan skin, his damp curls falling slightly onto his forehead. Youâre trying not to stare, but good lord how could anyone not.
âItâs only like an hour.â You're still sitting in bed, propped up against the headboard as you now watch him rummage through his suitcase.
He holds up a shirt and shorts, silently asking for your opinion. You give him a nod of approval and he heads back to the bathroom to get dressed, but he leaves the door slightly cracked so he can still talk to you. âYeah it was an hour. Iâve canceled the driver and made some new plans for today.â
âNew plans?â You raise your voice slightly so he can hear you.
âItâs a surprise.â He peeks his head around the slightly open doorâ a mischievous smile painted across his face, before disappearing behind it once more. âSo you had better start getting ready.â He commands as the door fully opens, revealing a fully dressed Lando.
A few short moments later a domestic scene plays out in the bathroom mirror. The double sinks both occupied, various hair products, makeup, and other random items are scattered across the counter. Youâre watching Lando through the mirror as he tries to wrangle the mop of curls on his head, but everytime you look away heâs watching you brush your teeth or do your skincare. And the occasional times your eyes do meet in the mirror youâre both like little kids, eyes immediately darting away with smiles on your faces and little giggles echoing through the bathroom.
âYou gonna tell me what the surprise is?â Patience had never been your strong suit and thus knowing about surprises was like a form of torture to you.
âIf I told you it wouldnât be a surprise now would it?â Heâs still screwing with his hair, but heâs looking at you through the mirror.
âOh come on, just tell me. Pretty pretty please?â Youâve come up behind him, your chin resting on his shoulder as you flash your best puppy dog eyes at him through the mirror. And for a split second Lando almost cracksâ those puppy dog eyes working on him better than you would have ever thought.
âThe faster we pack everything up, the faster you get the surprise.â Heâs shocked his words come out smoothly, his brain still foggy from your pretty eyes and close contact.
Ten minutes later youâre walking out of the elevator and into the hotel lobby, where Lando tells you to wait while he goes outside for a moment. You assume the surprise is outside and so you try to peek and see whatâs out there, but heâs coming back in before you can get a good look.
âAlright letâs go.â
You donât see anything that you would consider surprise worthy as you walk out the doors, but then Lando leads you towards the cars parked outside the hotel and stops in front of a vintage yellow Ferrari. Your eyes dart back and forth between Lando and the car, unsure if he was just stopping to admire it or if you were going to be riding in it. He answers your unasked question by opening the passenger side door, motioning for you to get in.
âIs this the surprise? Where did you even get this car from?â Your eyes widening over the car itself and the fact that heâd gone through the trouble of even finding the car.
âItâs part of the surprise-â Heâs got a smirk on his face as he speaks âand I have my connections.â He motions once again for you to get into the car and this time you donât oblige. The leather seat soft under your legs as you sit down, the car was surely close to 60 years old, yet still looked brand new.
Lando puts the luggage in the trunk while you're examining all of the carâs little quirks and details while you wait.
âOk, you ready?â Lando asks as he gets in the driver's seat.
âGonna tell me the other part of the surprise?â
He sighs, he wanted you to figure it out on your own, but you were so persistent sometimes. âYou know how youâve always talked about wanting to drive along the coast of Italy?â You nod, a smile already forming on your face as you realize what heâs planned for you. âWell, instead of just taking the straight shot over, weâre gonna take the long way all along the Amalfi coast. And I figured it was only fitting that we do it in a Ferrari, considering we are in Italy after all.â
You canât wipe the smile off your face as you stare at Lando from the passenger seat. Sometimes you wondered if he was even listening to you when you spoke, but then he pulls stuff like this and you know that heâs always listeningâ remembering things that you care about or like. âGod, I donât deserve you.â
Thankfully the car is still parked because youâre pulling Lando into a bone crushing hug, your cheek smushed up against the side of his head, a giggle emitting from him as he tries to hug you back.
âWhen you told me your work approved the time off, I knew for sure that this was one thing that I wanted to make happen. That same night I was online trying to find a car to rent for the day, but then I saw this one for saleâŠâ His words trail off and your jaw drops at the realization, but in all reality you know itâs a very Lando thing to do.
âAnd now weâre sitting in your newest baby?â
Heâs got a sheepish look on his face as he speaks. âAs soon as I saw it I knew it was the perfect car for this. Plus itâs the ultimate vacation souvenir!â
âYouâre crazy.â He actually couldnât be more perfect.
âYeah, but you love me.â He teases as he starts the engine.
âUnfortunately.â
âââ àŒșâàŒ» âââ
The long winding road along the coast provided scenery that was beyond your wildest dreams. It was serene and picturesqueâ like something straight out of a movie. The bright blue water on one side of the road and the white stone mountains on the other. The various tunnels that somehow had even more breathtaking views on the other side of them. The handful of towns that you had to drive through, each of them more charming than the last, you only wished you had enough time to stay a week in all of them.
As simple as this was, you would have been more than content with this trip if you went home tomorrow, not that you wanted to, it was just that sometimes the simple things in life meant more than anything lavish to you. You werenât hard to please, all you needed was Lando singing along to some song on the radio, beautiful scenery, and the wind blowing in your hair for you to be the happiest girl in the world right now.
The whole trip your attention was divided between the coastal beauty and the beauty in the driver's seat. You couldnât help but glance over ever so often at Lando, especially when youâd hear him start to sing along to a song. He just looked so ethereal sitting next to you, one hand on the steering wheelâ the other resting between you two.
There was a moment where you felt the sudden urge to reach out and intertwine your fingers with his, a moment of insanity youâd thought. It surely had nothing to do with how sunkissed he looked from only being in the sun one day, or how the wind had made his curls the perfect amount of messy, or how youâd catch him looking over at you with a smile on his face.
If only you knew that Lando had been fighting the urge to reach out and grab your hand too. Heâd never seen you so ecstatic over something as simple as going for a drive, but heâd drive this car till he ran out of road or gas, whichever came first, just to see that smile of yours. The way your eyes sparkled in the sunlight and how you giggled at his singing was just an added bonus, but all of them made his chest feel funny. Heâd been around the world more times than he could count, seen so many breathtaking places, but right now none of those places compared to the beauty that was sitting next to him in this car.
Youâre in your own little world so much that you donât even realize youâve made it to your destination until Landoâs putting the car in park in front of a very luxurious looking villa. âWeâve arrived.â Lando states in a sing-song voice.
âIs this when you tell me Max and everyone else are actually coming too?â You question, flabbergasted over the size of the house. And you can tell what heâs thinking just by his facial expression. âLando this place is huge just for the two of us.â
He rolls his eyes before getting out of the car to get luggage. âItâs actually a lot smaller than you think.â
When you step foot into the two story villa it immediately has that Mediterranean coast charm with intricate tile floors, artwork that adorns the walls, and windows with the most gorgeous viewsâ needles to say youâre in love.
Then you take in just how big the place is with itâs one too many bedrooms and bathrooms and various other rooms that you probably wonât even use. Landoâs words echo in your head as you explore the house some more, and thereâs nothing small about this place at all. âYouâre such a liar Lan.â Your words are playful as you walk through one of the many french doors in the house that leads out to the back.
âLie? I would nev-â
âOh my god!â Heâs cut off by you realizing that the backyard of this villa is nothing shy of paradise. A massive pergola covered part of the back of the house with vibrant bougainvillea lining the top and hanging down the sides. Various other flowers and plants are scattered strategically around the area. Under the pergola there's an outdoor kitchen and a large glass dining table, clearly meant to host a group of people, not two. Further out thereâs a pool with sunbeds lined down one side of itâ a poolside bar on the other.
All of these things are great, but the real show stopper is the view that this place has. From the front of the house you canât really tell just how close you are to the water, but from out back itâs a completely different view. Thereâs a separate sitting area slightly further out from the pool. Itâs got a little pergola of its own with couches and chairs and one of those fancy rock fire pits and that is where you get the best view.
Itâs like something out of a nature documentaryâ itâs so perfect that it almost seems fake. The sea is so close that you can hear the waves crashing against the rocks and itâs just endless bright blue water for days. You thought the view in Naples was pretty, but this was breathtaking.
âKnew youâd love this place.â Lando states as he comes up beside you, acting like he hadnât been lingering behind you the whole time, admiring the view (you) from afar.
It was true though, Lando knew as soon as he saw this place online that it was the one. It didnât matter that he paid an astronomical amount for it or that the house was way too big for just the two of you. All it took was for him to see the view to know youâd be the happiest girl in the world here.
He could picture you two sitting out here in the evening, watching the sun set over the coast, undoubtedly with a bottle of pink moscato. Youâd end up drinking one too many glasses and your cheeks would get red and youâd get the giggles.
As Lando stood hereâ eyes never leaving the beautiful scene in front of him. He canât help but feel that funny feeling in his chest over how radiant and happy you look. And he thinks that if this house was for sale heâd buy it in a heartbeat, if that meant he got to see you like this all the time.
A smile finds its way onto your face as you glance over at the guy you call your best friend. âYou werenât lying when you said you were gonna spoil me, huh?â You gently nudge him with your elbow, your smile growing even bigger at his response.
âOnly the best for my favorite person.â His smile is equally as big as you lean your head on his shoulder and in that moment he thinks that maybe the reserve driver could just finish out the season and he could just stay here with you.
That night as you both head to your rooms thereâs an obvious tension in the air. Youâre both slowly making your ascent up the stairs and lingering in the hall, trying to milk every last second until you inevitably have to go into your separate rooms.
After so long though, youâre the first to cave as your hand reaches for the doorknob. Your door creaks open and youâre mumbling out goodnight lan, iâll see you in the morning before entering the room. Although you donât close the door behind you and Lando takes that as an invitation to linger in your doorway. He doesnât need to speak for you to know heâs there, you can feel his presence, and subconsciously youâve left that door open for him.
âGoodnight Y/N.â Youâve got your back turned to him as you're digging through your suitcase for pajamas, but you can hear the slight grin he has on his face as he speaks.
The sight of Lando as you turn around has butterflies erupting in your stomach and it makes you feel weird to be feeling those things about your best friend. Heâs leaned up against the door frame with his arms crossed over his chest and that grin that youâd sensed him having was still on his face as he looked at you. Your eyes scanned over him, focusing on little details like his hair still being wind tousled and how the tops of his cheeks were slightly burnt from the car ride today.
And for someone who claimed to not need a ton of sleepâ he looked so sleepy as the two of you locked eyes. Those big blue eyes slowly blinking and drooping ever so slightly as his head now too rested against the door frame. He still donned the hoodie that you teased him about putting on earlier after his claims of it being chilly once the sun set, only adding to the sleepy look he had going on right now.
Someone had never looked so cozy and you wanted nothing more than to be wrapped up in his arms, but that wasnât going to happen tonight. You will tell him goodnight again and heâll close the door behind him before shuffling over to his room. Your mind will be preoccupied with him as you get ready for bed, the image of him in your doorway forever burned into your mind as you brush your teeth. As you crawl into bed you wonât think about how cold the sheets feel or how you want to be cuddled up to your best friend. You wonât think about how itâs been two hours that youâve laid here and sleep has yet to greet you. And you certainly wonât think about how youâd be fast asleep right now if Lando was beside you.
But unfortunately you do think about all those things and youâve exhausted every resource to try and distract you from it. It was different at the hotel when there was only one bed, but now with multiple bedrooms to choose from there was no reason for the two of you to sleep in the same bed. Lines were already blurring between you two without either of you knowing it and if you chose to go seek solace with Lando then those lines would blur even more.
But you didnât know that your actions would eventually have consequences and seconds later youâre throwing the covers off of you with only one destination in mindâ Landoâs room. The journey though, is short lived because as soon as you open your door youâre met with a wide eyed Lando, his fist frozen in the air like he was getting ready to knock on your door.
The frozen fist moves to rubbing the back of his neck as he speaks to you. âSorry, was coming to see if you were still awake.â
âI was coming to see if you were up too.â Heâs still got that hoodie on from earlier, but you noticed heâd changed out his shorts for boxers. His hair was even more messy and youâd wondered if he had even fallen asleep yet. âCouldnât sleep either?â
Lando shrugs. âNot reallyâ kept tossing and turning.â He acts like the reason he canât go to sleep isnât right in front of him as he rests his head on the familiar door frame.
âYeah I can tell by your hair.â You tease. He just gives you a half assed smile and when he doesnât tease you back thatâs when you realize just how tired he is. âYou want to watch some TV or something? â
He shakes his head no. The only thing he wants to do is go to sleep, but how can he when youâre not next to him? It was embarrassing to admit that only after two nights of sharing the same bed that he couldnât sleep on his own, but here he was. His big bed felt too empty and he realized that even if he slept in a twin sized bed it would still feel empty without you next to him.
Not to mention heâd found comfort in you being his personal heater at night. It was no secret that Lando ran cold, often seen sporting a jacket during race weekends while his teammate was in shorts. So with his personal heater gone, heâd resorted to wearing a hoodie to bed, which didnât come close to holding a candle to you.
When he finally worked up the courage to get up and go to your room he was pleasantly surprised to find you up too and facing the same problem as him. A little sliver of him hoping that it was the exact same problem and that you couldnât sleep without him.
For a split second you caught his eyes looking past you and towards your bed. He couldnât have made it any more obvious, but if was actually hinting at what you thought he was hinting at, then you werenât going to pass up on the opportunity. It wasnât a coincidence that he had come to your door and that you both had trouble sleeping in separate beds. So, you act on impulse and tell him come on just sleep in here tonight and like a little kid whoâs gotten scared of the thunder at night heâs crawling into your bed in an instant.
Itâs like you two are magnetsâ immediately finding your way to each other under the sheets and it doesnât take long for the both of you to finally fall asleep. And some time in the middle of the night Lando had shed his hoodie, no longer needing it with you pressed against him. When you two wake in the morning with the sun streaming through the windows and sleepy smiles plastered on your faces, thereâs an unspoken agreement that even with the plethora of beds in this house, you two would be sleeping in the same one every night.
âââ àŒșâàŒ» âââ
Lando and you were best friends, nothing more. Nevermind the sharing a bed every night or the longing glances or the sometimes suggestive thoughts you had about him. So maybe your friendship wasnât practical or normal, but there was nothing romantic going on between you two. It was something you had drilled into your head for some time now. Youâd try to ignore the way your heart would speed up when youâd catch him looking at you or the way he always has to have physical contact with you. And any other crazy thoughts that youâd speculated about had always been pushed aside rather quickly. He was your best friend after all and once again nothing more.
Though over the course of the week youâd found yourself having a hard time in pushing aside those non platonic thoughts about Lando. There were instances you two had found yourselves in that you just couldnât ignore.
âââ àŒșâàŒ» âââ
âWhatâs the plan for today?â You ask as the two of you are sitting outside the cutest little restaurant, enjoying brunch.
Lando finishes the last little bit of his eggs before answering you. âWell nothing that involves you getting behind a motor vehicle with the way youâve been downing those bellinis.â You roll your eyes at his dramatics. Yes, youâd had your fair share of bellinis, but they were so damn good and there really wasnât that much alcohol in them for it to be an issue. âHow about we just see where the day takes us?â
âWell I already had the idea of renting jet skis in my head, but I guess weâll do what you suggested.â You joke.
Now Landoâs the one to roll his eyes at you as he flags down the waiter for the check. He doesnât even look at it when itâs brought over, he just hands his card over like itâs nothing. Itâs something that you still arenât used to him doing even after knowing him for so long and youâre sure heâs gotten ripped off more times than he could imagine.
He quickly signs for it once the waiter comes back and with his card back in his wallet youâre free to go. Except when you stand up all those bellinis hit you and youâre a little unsteady on your feet, something that Lando clocks immediately. You arenât drunk, just buzzed, but Lando isnât going to let you live this down. âYou wanted to rent jet skis huh?â He teases as he wraps an arm around your waist to steady you.
âThink we still could to be honest.â Youâre confident in your ability to walk on your own, but Lando insists on keeping his hold on you.
âWell I donât want to waste a day at the hospital, so letâs just look around at the shops.â
Youâd passed them on your way to brunch and Lando had promised youâd come back to them. They were cute little stores, each one specializing in certain things. You took your time in each one, feeling the silky material of some of the dresses, admiring the leather detailing on the handbags, and gawking at the dazzling jewelry in the displays. Everything was quite luxurious and your eyes couldnât help but linger on a certain bag and bracelet, but the price tags were all you had to see to know they werenât coming home with you.
Lando had been watching you the whole time, fully prepared to be your bag boy and was ready to pull out his wallet whenever heâd see you pick something up. But much to his disappointment, all you did was look and after going through all the stores you left empty handed. âYou didnât see anything you wanted?â Lando asks as you continue down the street.
You simply shrug your shoulders at him. âNothing that I couldnât live without.â He doesnât press the matter anymore, fully knowing that heâd be coming back sometime this week to get you that bag and bracelet that you kept circling back to.
The streets are charming and bright. Itâs a place that you canât help but feel alive in, especially as the summer sun beats down on you, but the light breeze coming in off the sea makes it bearable. Your buzz was long gone, but Lando still insisted that you link your arm with his as you stroll down the streetsâ just in case. You donât oblige to his request, enjoying the feeling of holding onto his solid bicep as the sound of him slightly humming the song that was playing at brunch fills your ears.
A sense of peacefulness washes over you and itâs at this moment that you donât feel like youâre on the arm of the famous Formula 1 driver Lando Norris. He doesnât have a million cameras on him or people flocking to him for an autograph. Itâs just you and your best friend Landoâ the boy who was gagging when you teased the idea of ordering fish at dinner last night or who you laid in bed with this morning, watching dumb Tiktoks until you were both in tears laughing. It was nice for once, to just have Lando.
Youâre just about ready to circle back to the villa when you hear a woman shouting in Italian from down the street. Youâre not anywhere near fluent, but you recognize some basic words and what youâve heard has you pulling Lando towards the voice.
Fior! Bei Fiori!
At the end of the street there stood the lady, who had a cart of the most vibrant fresh flowers. When she spotted the two of you approaching, a smile painted itself across her face. âI think your pretty girl deserves some flowers, donât you?â
The corners of your mouth turn upwards and a smile is painted across your face. You can feel your cheeks getting warm at her statement, at the implication that you were Landoâs, but itâs his response that makes them comparable to the roses found on the cart.
Lando feels his chest get tight over the lady assuming the two of you were together. Itâs nothing new, for people to assume that heâs with a girl just because heâs seen with one. Though for some reason when someone says it about you, it gets a reaction out of him. Heâs grinning as he looks at you and then back to the sweet old lady. âYouâre right, my pretty girl does deserve some flowers.â
The butterflies that erupted in your stomach at his words were embarrassing and not the appropriate reaction to be having over your best friend, but his comment wasnât very platonic either. Youâre blushing and grinning, probably very easily comparable to a school girl at the moment. Heâs got a smug look on his face as he hands you of course the biggest bouquet the lady had. Itâs truly a beautiful bouquet and it smells divine, it had anything you could have gotten at the shops beaten by a mile.
As you head back towards the villa you canât wipe the smile off your face and you canât stop thinking about my pretty girl. The words shamelessly repeating over and over again in your head. âSo you think Iâm pretty huh?â You tease.
Now Landoâs the one to blush and he hopes you just think itâs just from the heat and sun as you look at him. âOf course I do. Iâd have to be blind to not think so.â Heâs sincere with his words, he truly thinks youâre one of the most breathtaking women heâs ever metâ intellectually and physically.
You lean your head on his arm, the same one youâve still wrapped yourself around. âYou sure know how to swoon 'em.â
âYouâre my best friend. I wouldnât lie to you.â
And for the first time, for both of you, it feels weird and almost stings to hear the word best friend said out loud. Because deep down you know youâre way more than that.
âââ àŒșâàŒ» âââ
Although you werenât that much of a party girl you didnât mind going out every once in a while. So when Lando suggested going out to one of the bars tonight it didnât seem like a bad idea. Youâd done your fair share of relaxing and to you that meant a night out deserved to be had.
With a final spritz of your perfume youâre ready to go and as you looked in the mirror one last time you couldnât help but think damn, I look good. You found Lando waiting for you in the foyer, his head lifting up from his phone at the sound of your heels clicking down the stairs. âMight want to close your mouth before you attract flies Lan.â He hadnât even realized he was in that much of a trance until you said something, he could feel his cheeks getting warm at getting caught.
You hook your arm with his as he leads you out the front door. âSorry, you just look unreal tonight.â
âWell you donât look too bad yourself.â Heâd chosen his tried and true white button up, leaving the first few buttons undone, which revealed even more of his gorgeous tanned skin. How someone could make something as simple as a white button up shirt look so good was beyond you, but it was clearly something he was skilled at.
The bar you end up at is relatively small and you realize it must be the most popular one with how packed it is. Itâs on the coast and thereâs a gorgeous outdoor area that you are immediately drawn to, mainly because thereâs slightly less people out here. Itâs still a good time though and the people are somehow even more rowdy out here and you wonder if itâs the fresh air.
Youâve danced, drank, laughed, talked, everything you could think of on a night out. It's been nice, especially doing it all with Lando, who somehow through the course of the night has undone more buttons on his shirt and you think he might as well just undo them all. Itâs clearly getting late from how the crowd is slowly starting to thin out, but you two are still having a ball, and you figure youâll stay till they kick you out.
Landoâs gone inside to get you both another drink, which he easily could have gotten from the bartender out here, but he claimed that the guy didnât know what he was doing. While you wait you venture off to a far corner of the patio thatâs somewhat empty. Thereâs a couple people sitting in chairs sharing a cigarette, but other than that youâre alone. Even in the dark the view is amazing and as you lean on the railing a nice breeze comes in off the water. Itâs relaxing and nice, especially when youâre that sticky kind of sweaty and a little more drunk than you realize.
âAbsolutely beautiful.â You jump at the unfamiliar, yet familiar voice. It had been a minute since youâd heard another British accent besides Landoâs. When you turn around to put a face to the voice you arenât expecting to see such a gorgeous man standing there. Heâs really the whole packageâ stunning blue eyes, pretty smile, fluffy light brown hair, nice facial hair.
âUh- yeah it is.â You assumed he was talking about the view.
âCan I join you?â
Heâs cute and you wouldnât mind some company, so you tell him yes.
âWhereâd your boyfriend run off to?â He asks as he nurses his Corona.
âHeâs not my boyfriend, but Iâm not wrong in assuming you know who he is, right?â This guy is in his twenties and British, if he didnât know who Lando was then he had to be living under a rock.
He takes a swig of his beer before responding. âI know who he is.â
You scoff, there was a big possibility that he was using you to get to meet Lando, it was something youâd dealt with many times before. Guys showing interest in you only in hopes of becoming Landoâs friend or even worse girls who would befriend you only to try and get with Lando. You werenât some step on the ladder that led to Lando, you were your own person with feelings and a life, who deserved to have people like you for you, not who you knew.
Maybe itâs the alcohol or maybe itâs the fact that youâre done being led on by people, but either way you confront the guy about it. âAre you using me to get to him?â
You hear him laugh a little and it lights a fire in you, but his words extinguish it before it gets out of control. âI was brave enough to come over here and willingly flirt with you before I even knew if he was your boyfriend or not. If I was trying to use you to get to him, I donât think that would be a good plan. Which now that I know youâre not his girlfriend, kinda makes me think heâs an idiot. How could he have a girl like you in his life and not be madly in love with you?â
Your brain is fuzzy as youâre trying to process what heâs said. âSorry wait- you were flirting with me?â
Heâs got a cheeky grin on his face and he lets out a chuckle at your cluelessness. âWhen I said âabsolutely beautifulâ I wasnât talking about the view.â
âOh.â Youâd thought it was kind of weird for him to just randomly say that about the view, but for it to be aimed towards you was the last thing you had thought of. âWell, flirt all you want then.â
Not only did this place have one bartender that was incompetent, it seemed like all of them were. Lando had waited for what seemed like ages for a beer and a vodka cranberry. It wasnât even that busy at the bar for it to be taking so long and at one point he contemplated just going behind the bar and doing it himself. By the time he finally got them he was surprised you hadnât come looking for him, but when he made his way out onto the patio he saw exactly why you hadnât.
Over in the corner Lando sees you doubled over laughing with some guy as he watches from afar. His grip on the glasses gets tighter as he sees you place your hand on the guy's arm. The tightness in his chest increases the longer he stands here and watches. It bothers him more than he cares to admitâ to see you with some random guy. To hear that laugh of yours and him not being the source of it is driving him crazy. But what really sends him over the edge is when the guy tucks a stray strand of hair behind your ear and without a second thought heâs storming over there.
Lando tries to play it cool as he approaches and heâs glad heâs got these drinks to use as an excuse. Your mid conversation when Lando interrupts, but he doesnât care one bit. âHereâs your drink.â He says as he pushes the slightly watered down glass towards you.
âOh thanks Lan.â You flash him a smile, but his face is emotionless and the fun light hearted atmosphere has suddenly turned awkward. For some reason you feel like youâve been caught doing something you shouldnât have. âUm, Lando this is-â You remember at that moment that you hadnât even asked the guy his name, which to you makes this even more awkward.
âHarry.â
âRight. Lando, this is Harry.â You motion between the two men. âHarry, this is Lando.â
Harry extends a hand out to Lando and they very awkwardly shake hands. âNice to meet you mate.â
Lando only nods his head at him before turning his focus back to you. âI think we should get going, they are gonna close soon.â
You think heâs joking, considering heâd waited all that time to get these drinks, and now he suddenly wants to leave. âI just got my drink, can we at least stay until I finish it?â It also feels rude to just abruptly leave in the middle of the conversation that you were enjoying with Harry. But Lando doesnât know how to hide his emotions very well and by the look on his face you know heâs being serious.
âWell you can stay, but Iâm leaving.â He knows he shouldnât leave you alone with some guy you just met, but god he doesnât think he can stand here and watch you flirt with him anymore than he already has. So, without hearing your response he starts making his way towards the exit.
A regretful look washes across your face as you look at Harry. âThat was so rude of him, Iâm so sorry. I donât know whatâs up with him, he never acts like that.â You take a big swig of your drink, fully knowing dealing with Lando is gonna be a pain. âIt was really nice talking to you, but I better go hunt him down.â
He shrugs, clearly not as upset over this whole situation as Lando or you are. âNo biggie, Iâm sure weâll see each other around. Itâs a small place.â You bid him goodbye, but you donât get very far before heâs hollering. âCan I at least get your Instagram?â Which has you coming back and quickly exchanging usernames before you're off again to find Lando.
You run into him in the bar and it looks like he was coming back out towards the patio. A look of relief washes over him when he sees you and heâs leading you away from the loud music and out the front exit before either of you can say anything. Only once the bass of the music is a faint sound in the distance does Lando speak up. âIâm sorry. I shouldnât have left you alone with that guy. I was coming back in when you found me.â
âI appreciate you looking out for me, but you were kinda rude to him for no reason.â
Guess you were diving in head first with this.
Lando stops walking and turns to face you, a confused look on his face. âI wasnât being rude.â
âYes you were. We were having a conversation and you just butted in and demanded we leave. Not to mention you wouldnât even speak to him. He was nice, you would have liked him if you gave him the time of day.â
âYou barely know the guy, you talked to him for what ten-fifteen minutes? I just didnât have a good feeling about him.â
You couldnât help but roll your eyes at his dumb excuse. He shook the guy's hand and didnât get a good feeling about him? Bullshit. âWell if you didnât have a good feeling about him then whyâd you leave me with him?â Heâd started to walk again, but stopped dead in his tracks at your words, spinning on his heel to face you once again.
âI already told you I regretted leaving you. I just had to get out of there for a second.â
âWhy?â You were being adamant, your arms crossed across your chest as you waited for his answer.
He knew exactly why, but he couldnât tell you that, he hadnât even fully accepted it himself. âI donât know Y/N.â
Youâre getting frustrated with him and these damn heels that you chose to wear are not making your mood any better. âThereâs a reason for everything, Lando. How would you like it if I acted like you did tonight with a girl you were talking to? Youâd be livid.â
He completely ignores your accusation and turns the conversation in another direction. It had been itching at him to know if you were just being nice or if you were actually interested in the guy, so he plucked up the courage to ask. âSo you were flirting with him?â
The look on your face is one of pure confusion, but your tone is nothing but shitty. âIâm not sure how you jumped to that conclusion from what I said or why itâs really any of your concern, but yeah it was just some harmless flirting. Iâm sorry for having a little fun!â You were thankful that it was late enough for the street to be relatively empty, the last thing that needed to happen was pictures or a video getting out of you two arguing. You were sure there were already rumors about you two being on vacation together, you could only imagine how this would be misconstrued.
Hearing that his best friend was potentially interested in someone else had his head spinning and he could no longer blame his reactions on the alcohol. He couldnât lie to himself anymore, ignore the way his heart raced when he looked at you. Or how he loved hearing that old lady call you his girl the other day.
It had been building upâ festering almost this whole week and maybe subconsciously he wanted to go on this trip with you to see if there was some truth to what everyone had teased him about. He just didnât think it would actually be true. Or that at two in the morning on a dimly lit street in Italy, during an argument, he would finally accept that he was in love with you.
But even with him realizing heâs in love with you, that doesnât stop him from being an absolute idiot. âHe was probably just using you to get to me.â Lando immediately regrets what he said as soon as it comes out of his mouth. He knows that's a sore subject for you and the look of hurt on your face makes his stomach churn.
âNow youâre just being mean.â Youâre sure itâs a mixture of things that are contributing to the salty tears welling up in your eyes at the moment, but itâs Landoâs comment that actually makes them fall. Youâre storming off before he can say anything, wishing you would have just stayed at the bar with Harry.
Lando knows heâs an idiot, but he also knows heâs the one who lit the match, which means heâs gotta be the one to put it out. âY/N come on. Iâm sorry. I know I shouldnât have said that.â He catches up with you rather quickly, your heels slowing you down.
âJust leave me be Lando.â
âY/N. Stop walking for just a minute.â Heâs grabbing at your arm, trying to halt your movement.
You stop and face him and for what itâs worth he does look sorry, but that doesnât change how you feel. âWhat? You want to poke fun at me some more?â
âNo I-â
âYou know I was just having a little harmless fun with that guy, like you said I talked to him for what? Fifteen minutes? Nothing was going to come out of it. But is it really that far-fetched of an idea for a guy to actually be interested in me just for me? Am I that undesirable and unlovable for it to seem like a reality? Or was he like everyone else whoâs used me and threw me away as soon as they got their five minutes of the almighty Lando Norris experience?â
The tears that slide down your cheeks are a mixture of anger and embarrassment and maybe you were being a little dramatic. Perhaps the multiple drinks youâd consumed werenât helping either, but when the person you care about the most says something like that, something youâd confided in him about, it hurts.
Lando feels his heart break to hear you talk about yourself like that. All he wants to do is to scream out that youâre not undesirable or unlovable. Heâs wanted you and loved you for some time now, the moment it started heâs not sure, but he knows it didnât happen overnight. Itâs always been thereâ he was just too blind to see it.
Heâs not entirely sure on how to make this right, he knows he was an ass, but he also knows he canât take back whatâs been said. The worst part is that he knows exactly how you feel and somehow he still thought that was a good thing to throw in your faceâ all because he was jealous. He could deal with people trying to use him, heâd developed a sixth sense for them and never let it get too far, but you were too kind. Your big heart and trusting of others had gotten you burned one too many times and it hurt Lando even more to know that all that had happened because of him.
âI should have never said that to you. I know first hand how it feels to have people use me and the only reason youâve had to deal with that is because of me. Iâm so fucking sorry.â
Your sniffles fill the night air as you try to calm yourself down. While people used you to get to Lando, at least they didnât want to be your friend to leech off your fame. Use you for your money and generosity, expecting paddock passes and some lavish lifestyle. People saw Lando as an object rather than a person more times than not. While your feelings were valid and Lando was still an ass for saying that, you realized to be in his shoes was worse. So, you wipe away your tears and accept his apology indirectly. âThink weâve only got each other at this point.â
His voice is soft as he approaches you, his hand reaching up to brush a stray piece of hair out of your face. âDonât think I need anyone else but you.â
The tender moment has you turning to putty in his handsâ the argument pushed to the back of your mind. His hand moves to cup your face and his tumb brushes gently across your cheek. You feel like time has frozen in this moment and for a split second you swear he looks at your lips, like heâs going to kiss you. The fact that this is your best friend is no concern to you at the moment. Then the moment between you two is ruined just as fast as it began, the sound of a very loud and drunk group of people leaving the bar up the street brings you both back to reality.
You back away from each other slowly, like you werenât sure exactly what had just almost happened. Youâd already resorted to blaming it on both of your emotions still running wild and the alcohol still coursing through your veins. The group of people are getting closer, their obnoxious singing getting louder as each second passes. They might not even know who Lando is, but you arenât in the mood to wait around and find out, the last thing you want to deal with right now is drunk fans. âWeâve had too much to drink, my head and feet hurt. Letâs go home.â You grumble as you begin the trek home once again, your feet aching more and more with each step.
Lando stops for a moment and kicks off his shoes, he couldnât let you walk in pain the whole way home. Especially after the pain he had caused moments ago. âHere put these on, your feet are killing you.â He hands you the white sneakers before squatting down in front of you to help you get your heels off.
Your feet already thank you as you slip on the oversized shoes that clomp on the stone street. And like a magnet you find yourself wrapping your arm around his as you walk down the street. Youâre sure you two are a sightâyou in shoes that are way too big and Lando only in socks as he holds your heels for you.
âYou know youâre still an ass.â You tell him as you lean your head on his shoulder.
âI know.â
âYou know you arenât unloveable.â He hopes you know heâs being sincere, your words still replaying in his mind as you walk.
âI know.â
By the time you make it back to the villa youâre both exhausted. The alcohol, the argument, that moment between you two, the walk homeâ you were sure tomorrow morning would be a rough one. There arenât many words spoken as you get ready for bed and as you slide under the covers next to Lando you canât shake something from your mind from tonight, and it wasnât the argument.
It was the fact that during the whole time you were chatting with Harry, you couldnât help but compare him to Lando. There wasnât the same sparkle in his eye like Lando, his smile wasnât the same, his laugh. It seemed like everything that you noticed about this guy came second best to Lando. Sure you were having fun and he was nice, but not once had the thought of Lando slipped your mind. And even right now, with Lando next to you, youâre still somehow thinking about him.
It didnât take long for Lando to fall asleep and you were on the verge of it when your phone went off on the nightstand. Usually, you would just ignore it, but something in you told you to see what it was.
harryinsta is now following you
You then see that he had sent you a DM and youâre expecting it to be about meeting up some time, which you were going to politely decline, but itâs quite the opposite.
harryintsa: i must have been mistaken earlier. lando's not an idiot.
yourinsta: huh?
harryinsta: heâs in love with you lol
Your heart nearly beats out of your chest as you read the message over and over again. Lando wasnât in love with you, was he? Sure youâd heard it from just about everyone in your life that you two were in love with each other, but you always thought it was silly. You guys were just best friends is what you would always say, but to hear it come from a literal stranger was different.
You couldnât lie that you hadnât recently had your moments of perhaps thinking that he did, though youâd always talk yourself out of the idea. Although, if he was in love with you that may explain his behavior tonight. Or maybe it was just the alcohol like youâd originally thought. Then the tender moment you two shared entered your mind and suddenly the gears in your head are working overtime.
You locked your phone and sat it back down on the nightstand. Just from a simple DM youâd gone from being dead tired to now being wide awakeâ staring at the ceiling. Youâre not sure how much time had passed as you laid there over analyzing every interaction with Lando. You were struggling enough trying to figure out the things you had recently felt about Lando, let alone the possibility that he was in love with you. All you knew for sure was that things werenât the same between you two, youâd felt a shift when you were with him in Monaco before the Belgium GP. It had only amplified during this trip and you had a feeling that by the end of it things would be different.
âââ àŒșâàŒ» âââ
Two days later youâre sunbathing on a comfy lounger on the beach, while Landoâs out in the water doing god knows what. Youâd given up on watching him a while ago, deciding instead to be productive and try to catch up to Landoâs tan level. Which, after laying here for some time now, it seemed impossible. That boy could be in the sun for a day and have a glowing tanâ you not so much.
Moments later you think a cloud has passed in front of the sun, but when you feel cool water droplets on your hot skin you peek open one eye to find a wet and grinning Lando standing over you. âHi.â
âHi.â You greet him back as you sit up, your smile matching his. âDid you have fun out there?â
âI had a lot of fun and the water felt amazing. You should have got in.â
âI will later.â You notice heâs got one of his hands behind his back like heâs hiding something. âLan, what have you got?â He tries to play dumb for a moment, trying to wind you up, but he eventually caves and pulls a plastic pail from behind his back. âPlease donât tell me you stole that from a kid.â Your half joking and half being serious, because where the hell did he get that from?
âI did not steal it from a kidâ I borrowed it.â The smile on his face never falls as he continues to speak. âThey had a bunch of them. I don't think theyâll miss it. Plus I needed something to put your present in.â
You cock an eyebrow at him, curiosity written all over your face. âMy present?â
Heâs smiling so hard as he sits down at the end of the lounger that you think this must be the best present in the world. Seconds later the pail is turned upside down and out falls the prettiest seashells. Your heart swells when you realize all that time he had spent out in the water he was looking for shellsâ for you. Thereâs a light pink one that catches your eye and Lando notices when you reach for it.
âKnew youâd like that one.â
Of course he knew that, sometimes you think he knows you better than you know yourself. âCanât believe you spent all that time finding them.â
He shrugs like itâs an everyday thing. âI knew it would make you happy, which meant I enjoyed doing it. Really only took me so long because I wanted them all to be perfect for you.â
The sun beating down on you feels cold with how hard youâre blushing. âYouâre my favorite person, you know that?â
Lando starts to get shy when you get sappy, like he hadnât just said the sweetest thing a second ago. Heâs smiling, but focuses on carefully putting the shells back into the pail. âYouâre my favorite person too.â
A while later you decide to open up the umbrella between the two loungers. You had chosen to give up on the tanning lifestyle and instead dive into a new book. While Lando was fast asleep on the lounger next to you, apparently all that hunting for shells had worn him out.
Youâd noticed out of the corner of your eye awhile ago that a little boy kept glancing over in your direction, specifically at Lando. You knew he had to have been a fan or he was the kid Lando stole the pail from. The nervous glances back and forth tell you that thankfully heâs a fan and you think itâs the cutest thing. Youâre in the middle of considering waking Lando up so the boy could come over when you hear a groan that is undoubtedly Lando awaking from his slumber.
âWhat are you looking at?â He asks as he rubs his eyes.
You nod your head in the direction of the boy whoâs just seen that Lando is awake and is practically bouncing with glee. âThink you may have a fan.â
A big grin spreads across Landoâs face as he sees the little boy. Lando loved meeting all his fans, but meeting the kids was his favorite. He thinks a big part of the reason he always makes sure to find time for the younger fans was because he was that kid once. Before he was ever F1 driver Lando Norris, he was just a kid who finally got the chance to meet their idol and he knows that picture or an autograph means the world to them
Lando motions for the boy to come over and heâs instantly tugging on his Momâs shirt to get her to come with him. She gives you guys a questioning look and when Lando motions again they both come over.
The little boyâs Italian accent is the cutest thing ever as he greets you two and you can tell just how much it means to him to be talking to Lando.
âWhatâs your name?â Lando asks as he signs a beach towel of all things.
âLuca and Iâm seven!â
âSeven is a great age. You know I started karting when I was seven!â
Lucaâs eyes get as wide as saucers as he glances back at his Mom, who is already shutting down any talk of Luca karting. âI told you possibly next year. Youâre still my little baby. I don't want you getting hurt!â
Lando gives the Mom an apologetic look. âHow about a picture?â Which easily takes Lucaâs attention away from karting, as heâs already at Landoâs side with a big smile on his face before his Mom has her phone out.
They take a couple pictures and high fives are exchanged throughout their interaction. The whole thing is very sweet and you canât help but look on in adoration, fully knowing that Lando would make a great Father one day.
You see that Luca keeps looking over at you and then back to Lando, but you donât pay that much mind to it. You figured he was just nervous or something, but what comes out of his mouth next takes you by surprise.
âYour girlfriend is very pretty.â
You feel your heart skip a beat and you glance over at Lando to see what his reaction is. You prepare yourself for the worst, but in true Lando fashion heâs all smiles. In fact heâs sporting that full face smile of his and it makes you feel funny.
âThank you buddy, I think so too.â He looks over at you with nothing but love in his eyes and youâre immediately looking away like some shy school girl.
Thankfully, the Mom comes to your aid and quickly changes the subject. âOk Luca, youâve bothered them enough. We should get back to our spot. Thank them for their time.â
His cute little voice mutters out grazie as he gives you a small wave goodbye.
âIt was very nice to meet you, Luca.â Lando bids him farewell and you both wave back at the little boy.
As soon as theyâre gone youâre immediately shoving your face back into your book, you donât even want to talk about what had just happened. It was nothing really to be so worked up over, it was just a little kid who saw two people together and assumed they were together. It happens all the time. But it is a big deal when you find yourself liking being referred to as Landoâs girlfriend. It doesnât help when neither of you deny it and correct the person. Lando likes to play into it and you love it too much to say anything.
Ever since getting that DM the other night your mind had been in a whirlwind over how Lando felt about you and how you felt about him. Hell you canât even look at him right now, youâre so in your head that youâve been staring at the same page for the last five minutes. You just wished the book you were reading could tell you how to come to terms with the fact that youâre in love with your best friend.
It was something youâd realized the other night while you were awake overthinking everything. Those feelings had always been there, but you had just pushed them aside, ignoring every little butterfly or rapid heartbeat. When they actually turned into romantic feelings you have no clue because as far as you knew, you and Lando had always been like this.
You two just dove in head first into the co-dependent friendship that was more like a relationship lifestyle. All those times youâd gone to his parents house for family dinners and holidays, both of you attached at the hip. How he wanted to ask you to move to Monaco with him and then almost didnât even move because he said heâd miss you too much. The group vacations that always ended up with you two going off and doing your own thing. The texts from him every Wednesday before a race asking if he needed to get you a paddock pass and a flight. This trip in particularâ sleeping in the same bed when you donât have to, the cuddling, the getting mistaken for a couple three times so far, the fact that it was just you two alone on the trip.
It was all there the whole time and you wondered how you could have been so blind to not realize it sooner. You were in love with him. You loved his pretty eyes and curls and the way his real laugh only seemed to come out around you. You loved his big heart and his caring nature and sometimes you thought he was too nice to be a Formula 1 driver.
You loved everything about him and truth be told it made your stomach hurt from how much you loved him. You wanted to actually be his and be able to kiss those pink lips that you sometimes found yourself staring at. When people said you were his girlfriend you wanted it to actually be true and not have it be Lando just playing along. You were so down bad that you prayed that Harry was right and that Lando was actually in love with you too.
While you were freaking out, so was Lando. When you immediately went back to reading your book and not speaking a word, he figured he had weirded you out by basically implying that you were his girlfriend. He just figured it was easier to go along with what the kid thought than explain that you werenât his girlfriend, but god does he wish you were. He didnât know what to say to try and test the waters because he knew whatever he would say would come out awkward and he didnât want to make things worse. So, once again itâs not talked about and you two pretend that it didnât happen when you finally speak again.
âââ àŒșâàŒ» âââ
Itâs the last day of the trip and youâre dreading going back to reality and away from this little slice of heaven. The only thing you have to look forward to is the supposed fancy dinner that Lando had planned for tonight, which was what you were currently getting ready for. Music plays through your phone and you softly sing along as you do your makeup. When you look up after digging in your makeup bag you spot Lando in the mirror, leaning against the door frame behind you. Your eyes lower and you see that heâs holding two gift bags.
"Those better be for your Mom.â You state as you put the finishing touches on your makeup.
âI think we both know they arenât.â He sees you roll your eyes in the mirror and it only makes him want to spoil you more. âItâs our last day, I think you deserve a parting gift.â
You turn to face him as he makes his way over to you. âI havenât gotten you a single thing this whole time. It makes me feel bad.â
Lando only shakes his head at you. âYou being here with me is the best gift you could have ever gotten me. I truly donât need anything else.â He hands you the bags. âNow open them please.â
A small smile finds its way onto your face as you take the bags from him. You decide to open the bigger bag first and once you pull out the tissue paper you know exactly what it is. Itâs still in its dust bag, but you see the branding and your jaw is dropping before you even see the actual thing. âYou did not get me this bag Lando!â You exclaim as you remove the dust bag and see that itâs the same bag you were eyeing at the store the other day.
He shrugs like itâs no big deal. âSaw you eyeing it and knew I had to get it for you and before you say anything else open the other present.â
You set the handbag down and grab the smaller gift trying to figure out what else he could have possibly gotten you. When you open it and see the bracelet you were also looking at the other day youâre at a loss for words. âLando Norris!â You could slap him, hug him, kiss him, and yell at him all at once. Heâd dropped probably close to six grand on these two gifts and your head is spinning at the thought of it.
âDonât even say anything about the price. I know youâre thinking it, but I wouldnât have bought you them if I couldnât afford it. I wanted you to have them, you deserve nice things.â You deserved a lot more than a handbag and a bracelet, but what he thought you deserved money couldnât buy.
You know there's no use in fighting him on it, but you still feel bad that he just spends all this money on you. He takes the bracelet from the box and fastens it around your wrist, the diamonds glittering in the light as you move it around. Itâs truly stunning and the handbag will go great with your outfit tonight. As soon as you two make eye contact again youâre pulling him into a bone crushing hug and you two stay like that for probably longer than necessary. âThank you a million times Lan. I love them both so much.â
Itâs time to leave for dinner shortly after that and when you arrive at the restaurant the host guides you back to a secluded corner. Itâs a very romantic ambiance and you canât help but feel like youâre on a date, which wouldnât be a horrible thing. Moments later a waiter comes over with a bottle of champagne and two glasses. âItâs on the houseâ for the special couple.â
There it is again and it seems like with each time it happens it makes your heart race even more. Lando shifts in his seat and you focus on the rising bubbles in the glasses as the waiter pours the champagne. Lando tells him thank you and your attention moves to the menu.
âWhat are you thinking about getting?â You ask, ignoring the obvious.
âProbably the steak.â He grabs the flute of champagne and takes a drink. âWhat was that? The fourth time now?â
You know exactly what heâs talking about, but youâre surprised heâs decided to talk about it. âYeah it was.â You set the menu down and grab the other flute. âThink Iâll get the steak too.â
Dinner actually turns out to be an amazing time. The food is decadent and Lando and you have good conversations that donât revolve around you two being mistaken for a couple or being in love with each other. When the waiter brings the bill youâre quite sad because that just means this trip is that much closer to being over.
You take your time heading back to the villa, trying to savor every last moment youâve got here. The sun was low in the sky by the time you get back and you tell Lando just how you want to spend your final evening in Italy. You hurry and change into comfier clothes and take off all your makeup before heading to the spot with the best view out back. Lando makes his way out there not too long after you, but heâs got one more surprise for you.
âDonât think the evening or this trip would be complete without this now would it?â He pulls a bottle of pink moscato from behind his back along with two wine glasses.
He knew you too well, but it was something you loved dearly about him. âYouâre a man after my heart Norris.â
He hands you a glass as he sits down next to you, the sun just beginning to set on the horizon. âI try.â
Thereâs a comfortable silence between you two for a while and the only sound to be heard is from the waves below. It feels like paradise sitting here with this amazing view and the guy you love next to you. Itâs probably boring to the majority of people, but this was everything you could ask for and more and the perfect way to end this amazing trip. You lean in closer to Lando, your head resting on his shoulder as he wraps his arm around you. A content sigh escapes past your lips as his thumb starts to draw mindless circles on your arm.
âThank you again for everything. This trip was amazing and Iâm glad we got to go togetherâ just you and me.â
âIâm glad too. It was probably the best summer break trip Iâve had. Donât think Ibiza will be seeing me for a while.â
Youâre not even looking at him, but you can sense the smile on his face and you canât help but laugh at his lie. âYeah, and I donât like pink moscato.â
âAlright so Ibiza will inevitably see me, but not as much as Italy.â He pauses for a moment, glancing down at you still resting on his shoulder, his heart swelling just by looking at you. âI think this may be our place now, just for the two of us.â His voice is soft when he says it, like heâs not sure if he wanted to say it outloud.
You lift your head up and are met with his piercing blue eyes staring back at you. He looked radiant as golden hour cascades over him and itâs like youâre in a trance as you look at him. You take in every last bit of him, all the little details about him that youâve memorized over the years. The slight stubble on his face from not shaving for a couple days, the little moles, his long and somehow always curled eyelashes, those pink lips of his. Heâs everything you could have ever dreamed of and more. Youâve had him at fingertip length for so long now and all you want to do is reach out for him, take what you want and never let go.
Lando feels his breath catch in his throat as you two make eye contact. Youâd never looked more beautiful than in this moment and he doesnât know how much longer he can take without you actually being his. You were the love of his life, his best friend, and everything heâs ever wanted. It may have taken him a long time to realize it, but heâs never felt like this about anyone before. You know each other like the back of your hands and it only makes sense that youâd be the one for him.
And itâs in this moment that it clicks for you two that itâs now or never. Youâre never going to have a perfect moment like this again. It feels right, like the universe wants this moment to happen and if you let it go to waste you may never get the chance again. Lando takes his free hand and gently cups your face, his thumb ever so softly rubbing across your cheek. Youâre practically putty in his hands and you feel like your heart is gonna beat out of your chest. You want to scream out to him that you love him, that you want to be his, but you can barely get your brain to communicate with your mouth.
âLan-â
Thatâs all you can get out before Landoâs leaning in and his lips are on yours. He tastes like the sugary sweet wine and his lips are soft as they move in sync with yours. Kissing him is even better than youâd imagined and as your hand reaches up to his neck you deepen the kiss. It feels like you two had kissed a thousand times before and as he pulls away youâre already left wanting more.
Your foreheads rest against each other, both of you breathless and a little light headed from that singular kiss. When you both actually internalize whatâs just happened youâre both grinning, that then turns into laughing and itâs like music to both of your ears to hear each other laugh.
âI think that was a long time coming.â You state as you finally lean back onto the couch.
Lando reaches out for your hand, intertwining his with yours. âWhen did you realize?â
âThat night when we got into that argument, which looking back now, you were totally jealous.â
âI was not jealous!â He tries to be serious, but the knowing look on your face has him cracking. âOk I was jealous.â
âWhen did you realize?â You question.
âThat same night. I couldnât understand why you flirting with that guy bothered me so much. Well I guess now we know.â
âYeah cause youâre in loooveee with me.â Youâre laughing as you speak, but he shuts you up with another kiss and leaves you pouting when he pulls away.
âOnly kissed you twice and youâre already pouting when I pull away? I think youâre in loooveee with me.â
You lean back in, capturing his lips in yet another kiss and youâre like teenagers whoâve gotten into their first relationship.
Lando sighs when you stop kissing him, he canât believe he could have had this sooner if he would have just opened his eyes. âYou think you could get another week off from work?â
Youâd do anything to get another week in a paradise with him, but you know itâs not possible. âHmm, why donât you just spend a week in London with me?â
âWell you havenât even told them that you now have a famous F1 driver boyfriend. Who if they didnât know already is very needy and needs to see his girlfriend.â He teases.
âWell you forgot to add that youâre my hot and famous F1 driver boyfriend.â You counter back.
Youâre both grinning like fools at each other and as you curl up into his side and take in the last sunset youâll see in the place that now holds such a special place in both of your hearts, youâre glad you let him convince you to come on this trip.
As the sun finally sets over the water you actually say those three little words.
âI love you.â
âI love you too.â
alex albon should be given a machine gun and diplomatic immunity
Iâve said it for years but Iâll say it again. People want Lando to be the 2019 version of himself. Timid with no self-confidence and imposter syndrome.
Yâall want him to be bashful and apprehensive of the other drivers, yâall want him to giggle so much that he cries in press conferences, yâall want him to look at George and Alex not as equals but as heroes.
Lando is not 19 anymore. Heâs gained confidence through the years and heâs found himself in this sport and seems to finally look at himself not as someone who lucked into the sport but as someone who deserves to be there.
Heâs paid his dues through the years. Heâs had a shitbox, a mediocre car and now a car that is worthy of his talent. Is he perfect? No, nothing about him is perfect. Heâs flawed both on and off track, but heâs resilient, talented, insanely hard working and he has never ever been complacent in the years heâs been in F1. Heâs championship material (and enough former drivers have repeatedly said the same) and now heâs a championship contender at the age of 24, and nothing anyone will throw at him or scream into the void or send him online will change that.
omg it gets better đ„ș

lando at media day for the 2024 dutch gp / ©shotbyanning
His cute "me!" and small "wowâșïž" after answering đ„č He's sooo stupidly cute and adorable.
someone tell him hes on camera
me if writing the best friends to lovers trope was illegal







landonorris: aug 24. sun and things âïž
i think reblogging oscar and lilys vacation photos feels so weird to me because of how normal they are. they could be my classmatesâŠ. feels like im putting that nice popular couple i knowâs instagram photodump on my own story for no reason
birds of a feather // cl16



pairing: charles leclerc x reader
word count: 30k (i know i've got issues)
warnings: google translate french and swearing
includes: friends to lovers, childhood bestfriends, soulmate au if you squint, heavy pining, and angst
summary: follows charles and the reader through childhood all the way to present day. based off of 'birds of a feather' by billie eilish.
masterlist
âââ§âââââââ§ââ
five and eight
It's a hot summer day in Monaco the first time Charles meets you.
The evening sun cascaded through the windows, golden rays bouncing off the walls as the smell of his Mother's baking wafted through the house. Charles' legs soon carried him into the kitchen and to his delight he found her oven-mitt clad hand pulling out a tray from the oven. His eyes widen when he sees what it is, it's one of his favorite sweet treats; cookies. His Mother spots him as she turns to set them on the counter. "Bonjour chéri!"
Charles doesn't answer, he's too focused on the cookies. He knows she won't let him have one, it's too close to dinner time, but he could probably sneak one when she had her back turned. So when she goes to put something back in the fridge he knows this is his chance, but he's not fast enough. His little hand barely hovers over one of the cookies before his Mother is gently smacking it away.
"No Charles! They are for the Y/L/N's." She hands him a stack of plates, motioning towards the table. "Now go set the table, s'il te plaĂźt." Charles whines about it not being fair before stomping towards the table.
All day the only topic of conversation in the Leclerc household was about how an old family friend was to be moving back to Monaco today. Charles and Arthur had no idea who the man their Father spoke so highly about was, but Lorenzo mentioned something about him being their "uncle", but not really their uncle. Something that at only eight years old, confused Charles.
Even during dinner it seems like his Father mentions their "uncle" somehow during every conversation. Between the constant talk of this mystery man and the cookies sitting feet away from him Charles thinks tonight's dinner is the longest dinner of his life. He can see them sitting there, the cookies taunting him the whole time he tries to eat the unpleasant brussel sprouts on his plate. He hears his Father mention their "uncle" again and his attention is brought back to the conversation. "Papa. Is he really our uncle?" Charles asks as he shoves around the food on his plate with his fork.
"Ah, no. I mean he practically is, but not by blood. He is a very old friend of mine. We grew up together, but he moved to America around nine years ago." He pauses for a moment, eyes flickering between Charles and Arthur. "I hate that Arthur and you don't know him, but he's back now, so hopefully you boys will see him as an uncle like Lorenzo does. Plus, their house is just down the street, so I'm sure we will be spending lots of time with each other."
All Charles can do is nod at him, he isn't sure that he can call this random man "uncle", but for his Father he will try to like him as much as he clearly does.
Dinner is over shortly after their conversation, with a little help from his Father's impatience to go see his old friend. And before Charles can try and sneak a cookie again they are out the door, the cookies held securely in his Mother's hands, heading to their "uncles" house.
Charles realizes his Father wasn't lying when he said their house was just down the street, in fact it's only a block away. He's surprised his Father wasn't dragging them here earlier today with how close it is.
His Father knocks on the door and after a moment a man answers."HervĂ©!âÂ
"Y/D/N!"
The two men embrace each other, big smiles plastered on both of their faces. "If it was up to me we would have been over as soon as you guys arrived earlier today, but Pascale insisted we give you guys a little time to settle in."
"Oh nonsense. You're fine." The man steps aside, motioning for everyone to come in. "Come on in. Don't mind the million boxes scattered around."
"It's a beautiful home." Pascale states as she glances around.
"Merci."
The man's eyes wander to Charles and his brothers. His arms extend towards Lorenzo and the two of them hug, the man tousling Lorenzo's hair as they pull away. "Dieu te regarde! You're practically a man!"
Lorenzo can only laugh at the man, whose attention is now on the two youngest Leclerc boys. He crouches down so he's at eye level with them. "Bonjour. I don't think we have met yet. I'm Y/D/N, a very old friend of your Papa's." His hand reaches out for Charles to shake. "You must be Charles."
Charles gently takes Y/D/N's hand and shakes it, something he's seen his Father do hundreds of times. "I am. How did you know?"
A smirk plays at Y/D/N's lips. "When your Papa and I speak, he loves to talk about his boys. Even the ones I didn't get the pleasure of meeting until now." His attention now moved to the youngest Leclerc. "Like you little Arthur." Little giggles came from Arthur as the man pinched his cheek.
"Are we going to get to meet the other members of your family Y/D/N?" Pascale asks.
"Patience still isn't your strong suit, is it Pascale?" The man teases as he leads them towards the kitchen.
As they enter the kitchen they find a woman with an American accent putting away dishes into the cabinets. From what Charles can gather from the conversation the adults are having is that their "uncle" met his wife while on business in America. They fell in love and he ended up moving there to be with her. They got married and had a daughter. He wanted to raise her here so they decided to move back to Monaco.
"Guess you should all meet the reason we moved huh? Y/N! Ma chérie come here!" Y/D/N yells.
And here you came, barreling into the kitchen, not knowing that there were five strangers standing there until it was too late. Cheeks turning pink as you hid behind your Mom's legs. "This shy little thing is our daughter, Y/N."
Pascale's face lit up at the sight of you. "Oh tu n'es pas une poupĂ©e? She's beautiful you two!" She glances over at your parents then back to you. "You look to be around the age of my two youngest boys, no?" She squats down so the two of you are eye level as you peak around your Mom's legs. "How old are you?" As you lifted your hand, little fingers all stood up straight indicating that you were five, Pascale smiled.Â
"Oh, that's the same age as my Arthur." She points towards the smallest boy, who's dirty blonde hair almost covered his eyes. She then points to the slightly taller boy in the middle, his soft blue eyes watching his Mom intently. "That is Charles, he's a little older than Arthur and you. He's eight." Then she finally points to the obviously very older son. "And that is Lorenzo, he's a lot older. It makes me feel old to say this but he's eighteen!"
Your shyness somehow slowly got chipped away by Pascale and you were now standing beside your Mom, not behind her. "Go on baby. Say hi to them." You Mom encouraged as she brushed your hair out of your face.
Even if you had braved coming out from behind your Mom's legs, the idea of talking to these strangers still scared you. You looked over to your Dad who stared back at you, a smile on his face and a slight nod in your direction told you everything was going to be okay.
"Hi." You said meekly.
The two younger boys gave you a small wave in return.
The adults had started to converse, leaving the kids to stand there awkwardly. Not knowing each other well to be the one to initiate conversation or play.
Your Mom had noticed the quietness between you and the boys, and your constant presence by her legs. "Why don't you kids go play out back? The house luckily came with a playset that is begging to be played on." She pulled open the sliding door, motioning for the kids to go outside.
Arthur was the first to run outside, he was practically already at the door when he heard the word playset. His little legs were already running up the slide by the time Charles and you had exited the house.
You watched your feet drag across the grass as you swung back and forth on the swing. Your Dad's voice playing in your head as you heard Charles and Arthur's laughter echo through the hot summer air.
"I know this is a big change for you mon amour. But I promise, we wouldn't have made this big move if your Maman and I didn't think it wouldn't have been a good idea. It may take some time for you to adjust, but knowing you, in a couple weeks you'll probably be more of a Monégasque than me!"
"I'm only half though. How could I be more than you Papa?" Tiny giggles escaping you as you gave your Father a questioning look.
"Anything is possible chérie! Plus you remember me talking about your uncle Hervé? Well, he has two boys that are around the same age as you. And I'm positive you three will become the bestest of friends like we were at that age in no time. When your Uncle Hervé and I were younger people would always say "Wherever there is a Y/L/N there is a Leclerc" and I'm sure it will live on through you three."
As you watched the two Leclerc boys chase each other through the yard, you knew your Dad would want you to get up and go join them. He seemed so excited at the idea of you and the boys being friends and you didn't want to disappoint him, but at only five years old, your shyness overruled the majority of your decisions.
Charles, even though he was playing with his brother, had noticed how you hadn't left the swing since coming outside. He tried to put himself in your shoes, he couldn't even imagine what it would be like to move halfway across the world.
What it would be like to leave everything you've ever known behind and move to a country that is nothing like the one you'd spent your whole life in so far. Even if your Father was from here and technically Monaco is as much of your home as America ever was, he knows that at least right now, this place means nothing to you.
So, being the empath that he is, Charles decides that it's his mission to make you feel at home. To make you realize that Monaco has been your home all along. That if he was you right now, all he would want is for someone to befriend him, make him feel less alone. His first step; asking you to play.
His skinny frame soon occupies the empty swing next to you, hands gripping the chains as he barely moves back and forth. His feet mimicked yours, dirt and grass staining his white sneakers.
"Hi." Charles watched as your head perked up at his voice. Your doe eyes timidly looking over at him like you weren't sure if he was speaking to you.
"Hi."
"Do you wanna play with Arthur and me?" Charles hopes you don't run back inside after hearing his question, but when your face lights up, head nodding enthusiastically, his worries dissipate. You were just so glad that he had come over and asked you, because you would have sat there on that swing all evening if he hadn't.
In a matter of minutes your shyness and worries about upsetting your Father were replaced with bouts of laughter as Arthur and you ran from Charles. Gleeful screams and giggles filled the evening air as the three of you played and for the first time since getting told you were moving you felt carefree.
The loud laughter and yelling had gotten the attention of the adults and as they watched their children play through the sliding glass door they couldn't wipe the smiles off their faces.
"That didn't take long did it?" Your Mom felt a relief wash over her. At only five years old she knew this move was going to be hard on you, and she wished they could have just stayed in America. But who was she to deprive you of experiencing the life that was quite literally half of you. Deprive her husband of seeing his little girl experience the same things he did as a child.
And as she watched the way the three kids played together she knew it was the right decision. For you to come out of your shell so quickly meant that maybe things weren't going to be so bad here after all.
"Of course it didn't." Your Dad stood behind your Mom, his hand on her shoulder as he watched his little girl laugh and run around. "Because wherever there is a Y/L/N-"
"there is a Leclerc." Hervé finished, an equally big smile on his face.
The painting of orange and pink hues that filled the evening sky told everyone that the sun was making her farewell for the day. Though, that didn't stop you and the boys from still playing and eventually as the colorful painting turned to a star filled sky you all were called inside.
Rosy cheeks and sweaty foreheads adorned all three of your faces as you clambered into the kitchen. "Looks like you kids had fun." Pascale had grabbed the cookies off the counter, but as she opened the lid to offer the kids one, she had a better idea. "How about some ice cream?" Charles' eyes lit up at the mention of ice cream. He loved cookies, but his one true love was ice cream. "I think the place down the road is still open."
And with an unspoken agreement, they are all out the door and headed towards the ice cream shop. Charles and you walk side by side with Arthur trailing behind the two of you. His complaints about being left out falling on deaf ears as Charles tells you about how good the ice cream place is.
The walk isn't a long one and before you realize it, you've arrived. The sickeningly sweet smell hits you as soon as you walk through the door, and your short legs carry you towards the counter, not paying mind to any sort of line that was already formed. Your face was practically pressed against the glass as you looked at all the flavors to choose from. But even with flavors like triple chocolate or strawberry or peanut butter cup. You always go with your tried and true; vanilla.
Charles and Arthur had joined you, faces as equally as close to the glass as yours.
"You think Maman will let me try them all?" Arthur asks, mouth practically watering at the sight in front of him.
"I don't know about that." You recognize your Dad's voice behind you. "You guys tell me what you want and then go wait at the table outside with Lorenzo." The three of you reluctantly turn away from the ice cream and when Arthur tells your Dad he wants mint, Charles and you share a disgusted look. "Ok mint for Arthur, what about you two?"
"Vanilla!" Comes out of both Charles and your mouth. Big smiles spread across your faces as you realize you both said the same thing.
"No way that's my favorite flavor!" Charles exclaims.
"Mine too!"
By the time your Dad comes outside with the ice cream Charles and you had established that; vanilla was the best flavor of ice cream ever, blue was your favorite color, red was his, you both loved dogs, and that he wanted to be a Formula 1 driver when he grew up. You didn't really know what that was, you think you had heard your Dad talking about it or watching it before, but the way Charles talked about it, it seemed like it was something big.
After many brain freezes and Arthur trying to make Charles and you try his mint ice cream, the night was coming to an end. The walk back home was filled with talks of things that you guys had to do this summer, according to Charles, and about how tonight would not be the last trip to the ice cream shop.
As you arrived at your house the grownups said their farewells and goodnights, while you gave everyone a simple wave goodbye. "I'll see you tomorrow!" Charles yelled as you entered the front door, and all you could do was yell back.
"Ok!"
And Charles wasn't lying, you did see him the next day, and the day after that. In fact, any free day that you or the youngest Leclerc boys had were spent in each other's company that summer. By the time school started back up the three of you were inseparable.Â
The idea of starting at a new school in a different country while knowing no one scared you, so you were glad to have Arthur with you in class and just knowing Charles was in the building made you feel more at ease. Any worries you had about moving to Monaco had dissipated and Charles had just somehow knew that he had accomplished his mission of making you feel at home. It may have taken him all summer, but you were practically family at this point to him.
So when he heard from Arthur about a couple boys in your class not being the friendliest towards you, something about you being an annoying American, he knew he had to defend you.
Charles fortunately had caught them in the act one day. Your cheeks slightly damp and eyes red told Charles it wasn't just them saying you were annoying. You wouldn't tell him what they said to you, but that didn't stop him from telling the boys off. It didn't take much for them to run off, heck Charles could have just stared at them and they probably would have darted, him somewhat forgetting they were probably only five or six, but still there was no reason for them to be mean to you.
Charles wiped away your tears before pulling you in for a hug. "They shouldn't bother you anymore, but if they ever do come tell me. You know you've always got me and Arthur and if it gets bad enough I guess we could tell Lorenzo." The mention of the oldest Leclerc boy made you giggle and Charles was so happy to see a smile on your face again. "You've always got me Y/N, we've got each other. I promise." He held out his pinky finger towards you and you hooked yours around his, officially sealing the promise
And from that moment on, you two always did have each other.
 ten and thirteen
Five years had passed since you first met Charles, and in those five years your bond only grew stronger. Not only with each other, but with each other's families too. To Pascale you were the daughter she always wanted and your Dad treated the Leclerc boys like his sons. It was like you guys filled in the missing pieces in each other's families.
Multiple scrapbooks were filled over the years with memories that would last a lifetime. Pictures of the joint family vacations that were taken every year, first and last day of school pictures, birthdays, and major milestones all filled the pages.
Looking back now your Mom could have kicked herself for ever second guessing the decision to move. Clearly this was where you guys were supposed to be, where you were supposed to be. Everything just felt right. It felt like home.
A new thing that had become a part of your life in the past five years was karting. No, you didn't drive them, but Charles and Arthur did. So, that meant it was now a part of you. Multiple weekends were spent going to watch them race, the smell of exhaust and the sound of the engines were ingrained into your brain, but you had grown fond of it.
Although, in the last couple years Charles had started to take karting very seriously. You knew his dream was to be an F1 driver, and you knew (from him teaching you everything about it one day) how much dedication it took from a young age to get to the top. So, over the last year, when almost every weekend he was busy, you tried not to take it to heart.
Unfortunately for Arthur, this year his family had decided to focus solely on Charles' career for the time being, as karting was expensive, and having two boys doing it was just not something they could swing. But with Charles busy and Arthur now free it was almost like the boys had flip flopped positions in your life.
Between the two youngest Leclerc boys it was always very obvious that you gravitated more towards Charles, the two of you having a bond that many didn't understand, especially considering your age gap.
Three years isn't crazy per say, but at the age you two are right now it's a little different. Charles is thirteen, officially a teenager, while you're still only ten. Two very different stages in kids' lives, and sometimes recently it seemed like Charles was moving on, or growing up, and you worried that he wouldn't want to spend time with you anymore. Because really what thirteen year old wants to willingly hang out with a ten year old? You know you wouldn't want to hang out with a seven year old.Â
But the slight gap that Charles was currently leaving in your life, Arthur had no problem filling it in.
During the school year you spent basically all your time with Arthur, being in the same grade and him not dedicating all his time to karting at the moment was a big contributing factor. You still saw Charles, but nearly as much as you used to. He had moved up to secondary school a year or so ago and unfortunately Arthur and you were still in your last year of primary school. So your time to see Charles was limited to his rare free weekends and sometimes after school.Â
You had thought come summer time you would be able to see him more and were banking on your annual family vacation, but you were wrong. In fact, you barely even saw Arthur this summer. They were so busy with Charles karting it was like they didn't even live in their home. And when they were home your family was busy doing something.
The annual family vacation had to be canceled and you had basically gone the whole summer without seeing them. That was until today, two weeks before school started, when you came downstairs to see Charles and Arthur sitting on your couch talking to your Dad, who was sitting in a chair opposite of them.
"Ah, there she is." Your Dad had spotted you from the doorway. "They've come to steal you."
Rounding the side of the couch you were now stood in front of the two boys. Arthur was the first to jump up from the couch, his arms squeezing you into him, the two of you slightly swaying back and forth as giggles escaped past your lips. "Tu m'as manqué aussi Arthur."
As Arthur finally let you go your eyes fell on the middle Leclerc boy, who was still sat on the couch. "Charlie." The nickname you had given him that first summer had still stuck around five years later. It fell off your tongue with ease, basically second nature for you at this point. He never minded when you called him that, in fact sometimes he preferred it, but god forbid anyone else call him that.
You could see a smile tugging at the corners of his mouth, dimples peaking out as he tried to resist it more. As he stood up from the couch he finally let it free, the corners of his eyes crinkled and dimples on full display as he wrapped his arms around you. You noticed you guys weren't almost the same height anymore, your head hit at about his shoulder now. Had he gotten taller since the last time you saw him? There was no way he had grown that much in almost two months, but yet the proof was standing right infront of you.
"Tu m'as manqué." Charles stated as he pulled away from the hug.
"I figured you'd have your kart seat stuck to you when I saw you again."
"Well when that seat becomes an F1 seat, I know who will be the last person I invite to a race."
You wedged yourself between the two brothers on the couch as you rolled your eyes at Charles. "Yeah I won't need an invite because I'll have a permanent paddock pass." You weren't even sure if such a thing as a permanent paddock pass existed, but when Charles makes it into Formula 1, you had better have one.
"No doubt about it." Charles states, which gets him a smile from you in return.
"So what was Papa talking about? You guys are stealing me?"
"We've got something fun planned." Charles had a small smile on his face as he made eye contact with you. And as you stared back at him you noticed something else that had changed in the past two months, his hair. It was shaggy and almost covered his eyes if he didn't have it pushed to the side. You were surprised Pascale hadn't made him cut it yet, or that she hadn't snuck into his room at night and at least trimmed the hair around his face. It was just another sign of how long it had been since you'd seen each other.
You glanced over at your Dad, unsure of what "fun" they had planned, but he was no help. "What is it?"
"It's a surprise." Charles had stood up from the couch, eyes staring back down at you. "Well come on. We don't have all day."
"Be careful! Je t'aime!" Your Dad hollered as the three of you walked out the door.
"Je t'aime aussi!" You hollered back.
The warm sun beat down on you as you walked the familiar streets of Monaco, following the two boys in front of you. Your insistent pleas of wanting to know where you were going were ignored. And it didn't take long for you to just start guessing random places, which were all met with groaned no's from the boys.
Thankfully you guys had arrived at your destination because you were running out of places to name, but the place you were standing in front of was not where you had expected to end up. Though truly you should have known better.
"Did you guys really just bring me here to watch you two drive go-karts?" Of course they brought you to the track. It wasn't like you didn't like watching them race or even just screw around on the karts, but as of recently it was the one thing that was keeping Charles away from you. It just would have been nice to do something that didn't involve karting.
"We aren't the ones who are going to be driving them." Arthur's devious little smile on his face tells you everything you need to know.
"I don't think that's safe, and don't we need an adult with us?" So perhaps you were slightly scared at the idea of driving â no you were actually more worried than scared. You didn't want to seem like an idiot because you didn't know what to do or wreck and make a fool of yourself. That little shy five year old girl was slowly creeping back in as Arthur and Charles practically dragged you inside.
"The adult is already here." Charles points at Lorenzo who's filling out paperwork at the front counter. "I think it's time for you to learn, no?" Your eyes focus on Lorenzo, praying as an adult he has enough sense to not let this happen. But it was no use, he had already handed the worker the paperwork and was walking towards you with a bunch of gear in his hands.
"No chickening out this time petite soeur. Today is the day." Lorenzo stated.
Before you can even protest anymore Lorenzo is handing you all this stuff to put on, arms overflowing as you stare at him wide-eyed. "Do I really need all of this for" you glance over at the track then back at Charles "an indoor track?"
"Safety first Y/N. Plus you need to have the full karting experience." His dimples on display as he gives you a reassuring smile, that somehow works wonders on you, because you're putting on all the gear without him even asking. "Oh wait you're gonna need this." He slides a hair tie off his wrist and hands it over to you. His action put a smile on your face as you quickly tied your hair back.
It was something Charles had done for a couple years now, always having a hair tie on him. You were always pushing your hair out of your face or complaining about it being hot and of course you never had a hair tie with you. So, he just started wearing one on his wrist, so when you eventually needed one, he was there to provide.
With your gear on you guys walked over towards one of the karts and you made sure to listen intently as Charles explained how to work everything.
You slipped the helmet on and sat down in the kart, praying that you could remember what Charles had told you. "You've got this. Just remember what I said and we will be right here if you need us. Iâll be right here. I promise." Charles holds out his pinky finger, the familiar gesture between the two of you meant much more than just a simple promise. And as you hook your finger around his, you know it's going to be okay. "Please be careful. I think your Papa will have my head if you come back with even just a scratch." Lorenzo says as he double checks that you're strapped in well enough.
"I'll be fine."
You gave Charles one last final glance, who stood there giving you a thumbs up, before pressing your foot down on the accelerator. At first you were going so slow, scared that if you went too fast you were gonna wreck. But as you completed a couple laps you started to feel more comfortable and the cheers from the boys helped you out too.
"Floor it!" Arthur yells as you pass by on another lap.
You were really starting to have fun, so you listened to Arthur and pressed the pedal all the way down on the next straightaway. You felt like you were flying, but what you didn't know was that they had put you in the slowest kart, so you really weren't going as fast as you thought you were.
After a couple more laps Charles stood by the starting line, waving the checkered flag, a cheesy grin on his face as you passed by him. As the kart came to a stop you understood why they loved karting so much, it wasn't just fun, it was exhilarating, addicting, you already wanted to go again.
The boys surrounded the kart as you undid the straps and climbed out. As you took off the helmet you couldn't wipe the grin off your face. "Looks like you might have some competition Charles." Lorenzo teases.
Charles ignored his big brother's teasing and shifted his focus back to you. He had felt bad about not seeing you all summer and in all honesty not that much over this past year. But things in his life were changing, karting was becoming a much bigger deal, and he was winning, like a lot. He knew things were only going to go up from here. And as much as he loved racing, and god did he love it, he breathed it he dreamt it, racing was in his blood. There just weren't many times anymore where he felt like a thirteen year old, like a kid. It sometimes felt like he was missing out on things.
But Charles knew that when he came home from a busy weekend or practically a whole summer filled with racing, that things would always be the same at home. His Mom would always make spaghetti on Tuesday nights, you had to jiggle the handle on the gate to the backyard to get it to open, if you went into the ice cream shop on a Thursday night when the owner wasn't there you'd get extra ice cream, the lady across the street will yell at your for playing in the street, and you will always be a couple houses down.Â
He knew that when he was around you that he could feel like a kid again. Sure, he had made plenty of friends through racing, but it seemed like all their conversations always somehow revolved or ended up referring to racing. Which wasn't a bad thing, because of course Charles loved racing. But sometimes he just wanted to talk about video games or other sports, or just something random. And he could do that with you.
Now granted, for someone who wanted to have a little break from racing before school started, you'd think he wouldn't be back at a track the first chance he got. But Charles had wanted to teach you how to kart for years, but each time he had mentioned it you chickened out. So he had finally gotten the nerve, with a little help from Lorenzo and Arthur, to just force you to learn.
He knew you'd do a good job, he never had a doubt. It was just your worries that prevented you from learning earlier. He knew you had grown to love the sport, from tagging along to some of his races, or how you can't wait for the Monaco grand prix every year, not to mention how glued you are to the TV when his free weekends and the F1 schedule line up. So, somehow in his own weird way, Charles knew you'd be a natural.
"You did do a good job, I'm proud of you." Charles flashes you a smile as you guys exit the track.
"Merci Charlie." You quickly shed all the gear and handed it back to Lorenzo. "I don't know why you guys didn't teach me earlier. That was so much fun. I see why you guys love it so much."
"Don't act like we haven't tried for years to get you to learn." Charles teases. "We basically just had to force you today."
Memories of all the past failed attempts at teaching you how to kart flooded your mind. The one time you hid in the bathroom claiming to be throwing up, the time you 'tripped' on your way into the building and said you sprained your ankle, or the many times you just flat out refused. So maybe them forcing you was for the better, because you wouldn't have taken the initiative on your own to learn.
"Whatever. At least I finally learned."
âââ§âââââââ§ââ
The walk back to your house was filled with Charles filling you in on his exciting karting filled summer. From the new friends he had made to the races he had won, he didn't spare any detail. And you just walked beside him, listening to his every word, grateful to just have him back around. Arthur would pipe in occasionally to contradict something Charles had said, fulfilling his little brother duties. And as the three of you traveled through the principality, the summer sun high in the sky, you wished every day could be like this.
The fragrant jasmine shrubs that lined the sidewalk told you guys that you were close to home. "You guys wanna stay for dinner? It's Friday which means Mom's making something pasta related."
Charles would never turn down a Friday night dinner at your house and so he had no trouble in accepting your invitation. Arthur declined, stating that he was going to hang out with some of his other friends, and Lorenzo had split from you guys at the track. Which meant it was just Charles and you, which was fine with you.
The smell of your Mom's famous red sauce, that she swore had to cook for at least half the day, filled your nostrils as you walked through the door. "Mom! Papa! Iâm home!"
"In the kitchen!" You heard your Mom shout.
You found your Mom furiously stirring something on the stove as Charles and you sat at the island counter directly in front of her. She tore her attention away from her cooking just long enough to notice Charles was with you. "Well look who's back! I hope you're staying for dinner?" A big smile accompanied her words as she spoke to Charles.
"Of course, you know I love Friday pasta nights."
"Well it's still gonna be a little bit until everything is ready, so if you kids are hungry grab a little snack or something." Her attention was already back to the bubbling pot in front of her before she had finished speaking.
Charles' stomach had been growling the whole walk home, and now sitting here smelling your Mom's cooking had it growling even more. So, he took up her offer and grabbed two tangerines from the bowl of fruit on the counter. Without even thinking about it, he peeled the first one and handed it over to you.
"You're spoiling her by peeling that for her Charles." Your Dad stated as he walked into the kitchen.
Charles shrugged at your Dad's comment as he continued to peel his own tangerine. "I don't mind it. I know she doesn't like to peel them and it's really not a big deal to me. So I guess as long as I'm around she won't have to."
You never gave a second thought about Charles peeling your fruit for you. He's done it ever since you expressed your dislike for peeling them years ago. To you it wasn't you being spoiled, it was just your best friend doing something nice for you. You gave Charles a smile as you popped another piece of the tangerine in your mouth. "Merci Charles." As you looked back towards your parents, you caught them staring at each other, eyebrows slightly raised, and smiles on their faces. "What?" You questioned.
"Oh nothing sweetie." Your Mom answered, attention turning back to the food. She knew you'd figure it out eventually.
The topic of conversation during dinner was all about karting. Your parents wanted to know all about Charles' wins and if anything exciting had happened during any of his races. Charles truly was like a son to them, granted all three of the Leclerc boys were, but you knew Charles was their favorite. They sat there listening intently as he told them everything and your Dad gave him nothing but praises back.
"You're gonna do great things Charles. I just know it."
And finally when Charles changed the conversation to how he finally taught you how to kart, your Dad though first worried at the idea of you getting hurt, was ecstatic to hear that you were quite good and that you enjoyed it. Your Mom didn't like the idea at all, the sour look on her face told you everything. "I can barely handle watching Charles, let alone my baby."
"I was the only one on the track, Mom. Plus it was just for fun, you don't have to worry about me doing the real thing. I really was not as good as Charles says I was." You tried to reassure her, but she still didn't seem pleased.
"Maybe it will help to know that we put her in the slowest kart." Charles chimed in.
Your head whipped to the right of you, where Charles was sat. "You put me in the slowest one?! You really thought Iâd be that bad?"
"It was your first time! You were nervous as is, let alone putting you in a fast one."
A scoff came from you. "I feel cheated out of a real experience."
"Well, the slowest is fine with me. In fact, how do we find one slower than the slowest?" Your Mom inquired, nothing shy of a serious look on her face.
As dinner came to an end Charles and you helped clean up and then ventured out back. The sun had just set, allowing for dusk to settle in, the remnants of the sunset still lingering in the sky. The two of you found yourselves on familiar territory, the swings. The metal chains had slightly rusted over the years, but still held strong as the two of you swayed back and forth on them.
Silence fell between the two of you as you tried to figure out how to talk to Charles about the thing that had been subconsciously bothering you for a while.Â
Him forgetting about you.Â
He had his head down, staring at his feet as he slowly swung back and forth on the swing. "Charles?" He lifted his head at the sound of your voice, blue eyes slightly covered by his shaggy hair.
"Yeah?"
Your hands gripped the chains tighter as you stilled your movements, feet planted firmly in the worn patch of grass. "I need you to make me a promise."
He had copied your actions, even going as far as turning slightly to face you as he spoke. "For what?"
"I need you to promise that you won't forget about me. That when you make it into F1 and become super famous that you won't think I'm some loser. Or even when you move up to F3, just please promise me you won't forget about me."
Charles frowned at your words, never in a million years would he forget about you, or think you were a loser. He didn't want to get into F1 to become famous, yeah it was a perk of the job, but he wanted a seat in F1 because he loved racing, and it meant that he was one of the best in the world.
He held out his pinky finger towards you. "Do you remember what I said to you when those boys were teasing you during your first year here?" You shook your head, the memory replaying in your mind. "That youâve always got me and Iâve always got you. So that means I don't think I could ever forget about you Y/N, whether I make it into F1 or not. And If I do, I'm gonna need my number one supporter there by my side aren't I? So I promise I wonât forget you."
A big smile spread across your face at his words and as you hooked your pinky finger around his, you knew the promise was true.
But what you didn't know was that sometimes promises are broken.
thirteen and sixteen
Thirteen is a very weird year for you.Â
Itâs not puberty or the ever revolving drama that comes with being thirteen that is making it a weird year. Itâs the embarrassingly painful crush youâve got on Charles.Â
Itâs a cliche really, having a crush on the cute older boy youâve grown up with.Â
And one might ask why is it embarrassing? For starters, you canât be around him for more than five minutes without turning into a blushing mess. He stares at you for longer than a second? Game over. He smiles at you? Done for. He laughs at something you said? Youâre dead.Â
He doesnât know heâs turning your thirteen year old brain into mush just by simply existing and itâs embarrassing to even think about him knowing that.Â
On the other hand, itâs painful. Youâre thirteen and heâs sixteen, once again at very different stages in life. And you know that he doesnât like you back, that he only sees you as a little sister, but it still hurts. It hurts because youâre thirteen and you think that youâre mature for your age and you honestly think why wouldnât he like you back. Itâs something almost every young girl goes through, and unfortunately itâs happening to you with someone you are very close with.Â
Yes, you had always thought he was cute, but that's because he was. That fluffy brown hair, long thick eyelashes that adorned his pretty eyes, his dimples, the little crinkles by his eyes when he smiled. Okayâ so maybe that's how you would describe him now, but still, he was a cute kid also, there was no denying that.Â
 But if you really had to figure out when you realized you had a crush on Charles it had to have been this past Christmas.  Â
âââ§âââââââ§ââ
The holidays in Monaco were somewhat different than the few years you remembered back in America. You had stopped celebrating Thanksgiving after your Momâs failed attempt at trying to make a Thanksgiving dinner your first year here. It wasnât that your Mom was a bad cook, it was that it was somewhat hard to find everything needed for a Thanksgiving dinner in Monaco. And as hard as your Mom tried to make it work, it just wasnât the same without that damn Ocean Spray cranberry sauce.Â
So to make up for not celebrating Thanksgiving your family truly went all out for Christmas. The couple Christmases that you could remember back in America were nothing shy of magical, but ever since moving to Monaco, your family took Christmas very seriously. There was no denying that part of your household was American, because every year your house looked like it came straight out of a cult classic Christmas movie. Like Kevin McCallister or Clark Griswold had taken up residence in Monaco for the holidays.Â
It wasnât just the outside that was decorated, the inside was just as festive and of course the tree was the main focal point. It was a busy tree, your Mom never liked an aesthetically pleasing tree, it was sentimental or nothing to her. Ornaments that were passed down on her side of the family, ones you had made in school, and some you had gotten after moving all had a home on the tree.Â
And as if decorating wasnât enough for your family, your traditions were even more of a big deal. The most important one to you though was making cookies on Christmas Eve. Mainly because Arthur and Charles had been doing it with you since your first Christmas in Monaco.Â
Christmas music played on the record player in the living room, the sound traveling into the kitchen as your Mom and you made sure you had everything ready to bake. You were in your own little world, picking out your favorite cookie cutters and humming along to Wham!âs Last Christmas when you heard your Mom speak up. âYouâre just in time Charles.âÂ
Your eyes moved away from the pile of cookie cutters up to the garland decorated doorway where Charles was standing. A smile slowly crept its way onto your face as the two of you made eye contact. He looked cozy, the sweater he had on was slightly oversized and his hair had a messy fluffy look to it.Â
You watched as he talked to your Mom, she was surely talking to him about racing, and he would always gladly answer her questions, as she was nothing shy of a second Mom to him. The longer you stared at him, you could feel your heartbeat quickening. And a feeling was arising in you that you had only ever experienced with a boy in your class a year or so ago. Though, the feeling didnât last long, you had caught him picking his nose, and with that went away any feelings you had towards him.Â
You didnât even want to think about the word that was happening right now, the idea of it only making your heart race even faster. You tore your eyes away from Charles and noticed that the youngest Leclerc brother was missing, so you blamed your rapid heart beat and surely pink cheeks on that.
You cleared your throat and tried to gather yourself before speaking. âWhereâs Arthur?âÂ
Charles' attention was torn away from your Mom over to you. He pursed his lips, he didnât know how to say nicely that Arthur said that baking Christmas cookies was for little kids, and he wasnât a little kid anymore. He let out a sigh before speaking. âHeâs not coming, he said heâs too old to be baking cookies.â
âBut its-âÂ
âI know. I told him that itâs tradition and that you would be upset, but he wasnât budging. So youâre stuck with just me.âÂ
It annoyed you that Arthur had bailed on you. There was no such thing as being too old to bake cookies, he was just being a jerk. And as far as you were concerned, heâs not allowed any of the cookies when your families have Christmas together tomorrow evening.Â
On the bright side you get to have some one on one time with Charles, so maybe it was a blessing in disguiseâ Arthur bailing on you. You picked up the recipe card from the counter, waving it around in the air. âWell letâs get to work then.âÂ
Charles is at your side in an instant, rolling up the sleeves of his sweater as he waits for further instruction.Â
âDo you think you kids can handle doing it by yourselves this year? Iâve got some last minute gifts that need to be wrapped.â Your Mom inquired, hopeful that you wouldnât burn the house down on Christmas Eve.Â
You didnât even look up at her, eyes focused on the recipe in front of you, this was clearly something you took seriously. âYes Mom.âÂ
Without a word she was gone, leaving Charles and you to your own devices.Â
You can feel Charles peering over your shoulder. Heâs practically right up against your side and you can feel the soft material of his sweater on your arm. All you can smell is his cologne, something he had started to use within the last year or two, thankfully moving on from the Axe body spray phase. And youâre trying not to make this seem like a big deal, because itâs truly not, but something has shifted in your thirteen year old brain. The same brain being scrambled by him right now, and you think youâve read the damn recipe card at least ten times now.Â
âDid you forget that the recipe is in American measuring terms?â Charles asks. The recipe was your Grandmaâs and your Mom had never been bothered to convert it to the metric system.Â
âNope, just double checking everything.â You force a smile as you set down the recipe card and grab a mixing bowl. You added all the ingredients and made Charles do all the labor, which meant he had to mix it and then roll out the dough.Â
You dug through the pile of cookie cutters looking for Charles favorite one. âHerree it isss.â You spoke in a sing songy voice as you held up the cookie cutter to Charles. His favorite in question? A penguin with a Santa hat on. Without fail, every Christmas, for the past eight years. Charles made an excessive amount of Santa hat penguin cookies.Â
A grin spread across his face as you placed it in his hand. âWouldnât be Christmas without this guy.â He wasted no time in pressing the cutter down into the dough and before you guys knew it the first batch was done and in the oven.Â
As you started on the next batch Charles kept a close eye on the baking cookies. The two of you allowed for Michael Buble to fill silence in the air and the mouthwatering smell of the cookies soon filled your nostrils. âYou know you still call her Mom?â
Your eyebrows furrowed at Charles' random statement. âHuh?âÂ
He walked away from the oven and back to his original spot next to you. âYou still call your Maman Mom.âÂ
âYes?â You werenât really sure where he was going with this, it was nothing new to either of you.Â
âI just figured by now you would have made the switch. You speak French with everyone else.âÂ
You shrugged your shoulders at him, you had never really considered it, the idea felt weird even just thinking about it now. âIâve always spoken English with my Mom and French with Papa. It would feel weird to switch stuff around now.â You stirred in the flour as you continued the conversation. âYou know I could give you some English lessons if youâd like. I think that might have been what you were hinting at.â You teased.Â
Charles' eyes widened at your words. âAre you saying my English is not good? I think I speak English very good!âÂ
âWell.â You didnât skip a beat.Â
âWhat?âÂ
âYou think you speak English very w-âÂ
In an instant there is flour all over the upper part of your body, your movements stilled as youâre processing what Charles had just done. Youâre mad at first, actually seething because your hair looked so good today and now itâs covered in flour. And you canât see Charles because you havenât moved an inch since he threw the flour at you, but he went from having a shit eating grin on his face to a oh shit expression. Your quietness has him worried that youâre actually really pissed at him, but when he hears his nickname come past your lips he knows you're not that mad at him.Â
âCharlie. You better run.âÂ
He isnât sure heâs heard you right, but when he sees you pick up the whole bag of flour his sock clad feet are sliding on the floor as he runs around the other side of the kitchen island. You're playing cat and mouse around the island for quite some time. The beeping from the oven time ignored multiple times as giggles from both of you filled the room.Â
As Charles rounds the corner again his foot catches on one of the barstool legs and you know youâve finally got him. He doesnât fall, but he slips just enough to allow you to fully catch up to him. And you may or may not have thrown the whole bag of flour at him, but him being covered head to toe in flour says it was the whole bag. You definitely got him 10x worse than he did you and from that gleam in his eye you know what heâs going to do, but you canât get away fast enough and his arms are around you in an instant. He shakes his head trying to get as much of the flour off of him and onto you and by you trying to free yourself from his grip heâs transferred a good amount from his clothes onto yours. âCharles! Let me go!â Your pleas are pitiful, laughter dripping off every word.Â
âOh my god!âÂ
Both of your eyes widen, bodies frozen at the sound of your Momâs less than pleased voice. The two of you sheepishly stood there as your Mom looks like sheâs about ready to cry and cuss you out at the same time. âI canât leave you two alone for an hour?!â Her eyes shift to behind the two of you, panic written across her face. Sheâs practically running towards the oven and thatâs when you realize the burning smell. And when she not so softly sets the cookie sheet onto the counter you know sheâs really not happy. The cookies were burnt to a crisp, the poor Santa hat penguin never stood a chance. âIâm sorry Y/M/N. It was my fault, I started it.â Charles rubbed the back of his neck, clearly embarrassed.Â
âI donât care who started it because youâre both cleaning up this mess.â A deep sigh came from you Mom as she really took in just how big of a mess the two of you had made, her head shaking in disapproval as she left the two of you to clean up.Â
When you knew she was out of earshot you couldnât but let out a little giggle, it was like in school when you werenât supposed to be laughing, but everything is just so funny, and Charles follows your actions seconds later. The two of you fools, covered in flour, cookies burnt, and in trouble as you stood there laughing.Â
That night you couldnât sleep, tossing and turning in your bed, your brain would not shut off. And it wasnât because you were excited for Christmas morning, you only wished that was the reason. You couldnât get how good it felt to have Charles arms wrapped around you out of your mind, or how that stupid sweater made him look even more attractive than he already was.Â
As you stared up at the ceiling, you knew you were screwed. You had a big fat crush on Charles and it was going to ruin your life. You knew he only saw you as a little sister and that made everything so much more worse to you. Why did you have to develop feelings for him of all people?Â
Christmas morning came and went and before you knew it evening had arrived, meaning the Leclercâs would be arriving soon. You were in charge of setting the table, a task you didnât mind, considering being in the kitchen with your Mom on any holiday was like asking to get yelled at. As you folded the last napkin neatly and placed it in its rightful spot you heard commotion coming from the front door, undoubtedly the Leclercâs arriving. You spotted Pascale struggling to juggle all the presents and you hurried towards her, quick to offer a hand. âMerci chĂ©ri.â A grateful smile painted across her face.
The pile of presents grows as you place them under the tree and youâd think your family hadnât already opened some this morning. Everyone settles into their usual spots in the living room, but your usual spot by Charles is left empty, as youâve scurried into the kitchen. Youâd rather face the unwarranted wrath from your Mom than be unable to compose yourself around Charles. But you donât get to hide in the kitchen for very long because sheâs practically done with everything, so you help her bring in all the food to the table, and admire your table setting skills as you do so.Â
Dinner is pretty uneventful and luckily your Dad has Charles preoccupied with racing talk for most of the time. But you canât help but catch his eye from across the table every once in a while and every time you do your heart skips a beat. By the time presents start getting passed around you had successfully avoided Charles for most of the day, but that is ruined when he plops down next to you on the floor, shoulders brushing as he gets situated.Â
âAre you mad at me for yesterday?â Charles' voice is low, like he didnât want anyone to hear, but he could have talked at full volume, no one would have heard him over how loud your Dads were being.Â
You cocked an eyebrow at him. âWhy would I be mad at you?âÂ
âYouâve been avoiding me all day.âÂ
Your fingers toyed with the lifted corner of wrapping paper on the present in front of you, your brain trying to figure out what to say. Yes, you had been avoiding him, but it wasnât because you were mad. It was actually the opposite, but you couldnât tell him that. âIâm not mad at you. Just didnât want there to be another flour fiasco today. You thought she was mad yesterday, now imagine that while sheâs in her holiday cooking zone.â You give him a reassuring smile, hoping that heâs bought what youâve told him. But he doesnât get the chance to respond as your Momâs voice fills the room.Â
âOk does everyone have all their presents? Our Santa this year was less than enthusiastic about handing out the presents.â Your Mom shoots Arthur a look as he sits down on the floor across from Charles and you.Â
âThere is nothing left under the tree. I promise.â Arthur states.Â
âAlright then everyone get after it!âÂ
Piles of wrapping paper fill the empty spots on the floor in no time and excited gasps fill the room as everyone unwraps their gifts. Youâre always so grateful for everything the Leclercâs get you for Christmas, they treat you like one of their own, and sometimes you feel they spoil you a little too much.Â
With each present that you unwrapped that wasnât from Charles, you start to get a little worried. You guys exchanged presents every year and if he didnât get you something this year, you think you might die. So when you come to your last present and it says itâs from his parents, you try to hide your disappointment, especially because itâs an amazing gift. You hop up from your spot on the floor and make sure to go thank them personally, hugs and all. And youâre pretty sure you hear them say something about how youâre their daughter too and how you deserve it, but your brain is still thinking about how Charles didnât get you anything.Â
When you go back to your spot a little perfectly wrapped box with a bow on it is sitting there. You know you werenât sitting on that, so it had to be placed there after you got up. You think itâs one of Charles that he forgot about, but when you bend over to pick it up you see Charles sloppy handwriting on it. A smile spreads across your face as you look over at Charles who has an equally big one on his. You quickly sit down, eager to know whatâs inside.Â
âDid you think I didnât get you anything?â Charles questions, a smirk toying at his lips.Â
âMaybe.â Yes.Â
âI would never.â He bumps his shoulder into yours, motioning for you to open it. âWell, go on. What are you waiting for?âÂ
You donât want to seem like you're absolutely ripping into the present, but it probably looks like you are. Itâs a tiny box, like one used for jewelry, and you really arenât expecting Charles to have gotten you jewelry. But when you open the box, nestled in the velvet cushion, is a ring. You glance over at him, eyebrows furrowed in confusion, then back to the ring. Itâs just a simple sterling silver ring and somewhat on the smaller side. To be honest Charles could have gotten you a bag of candy and you would have been happy to have just gotten something from him, let alone a ring.Â
But when you pick the ring up from the box you see exactly why itâs smaller, and it makes your heart swell. On the inside of the ring you see the words pinky promise engraved into it and as you look over at Charles, heâs holding out his pinky finger, a matching ring adorning it. Your cheeks are hurting from how hard you're smiling, but you donât care. Itâs the most thoughtful gift anyone has ever gotten you and as you slide it onto your pinky finger you feel yourself smiling even more, if thatâs possible. Your arms are around Charles instantly, pulling him in towards you, thank youâs tumbling out of your mouth as he giggles in response.Â
âIâm glad you like it.â He pauses, trying to figure out the right words to say. âThings are changing. Iâm moving up from karting and hopefully into Formula 3 within the next year. Itâs just a reminder that weâve always got each other, even if Iâm gone racing or youâre off doing something, we can look at the rings and know weâve got a piece of each other with us, always.âÂ
You canât stop smiling at him, and that crush youâve got has tripled in size in a few short hours. Your teenage brain over exaggerates everything and you basically think this means youâre gonna be together forever, even though you arenât even together.Â
While youâre in make believe land, your parents are observing the two of you. Whispers and knowing glances are exchanged, between them and your Moms canât help but think itâs cute how close the two of you are. While your Dad in particular, no matter how he feels about Charles, thinks no boy is good enough for his little girl, let alone some sixteen year old boy.Â
Perhaps you may be a little dramatic when you say that this Christmas was the best one youâd had so far, but honestly it was the truth. Sure you realized you had a huge crush on Charles that will probably end in tears, but you also got the most thoughtful gift ever, that you will cherish forever. So yeah, this was a good Christmas, crush aside.Â
âââ§âââââââ§ââ
And so you lived with admiring Charles from afar for months. Enjoying what time you got together and just holding out hope that maybe one day he wouldnât see you as his little sister. But life had a funny way of hitting you in the face with reality, especially at thirteen.Â
When Charles shows up to a joint family dinner one night with a girl around his arm you feel like all the air has escaped your lungs. And when he introduces her to everyone as his girlfriend you plaster on a smile even though you feel like someone has pulled your heart out of your chest and ran it over multiple times.
Itâs the longest dinner of your life and while everyone gushes over his girlfriend, asking her all about her life and interests, you poke your food around with your fork. Itâs not like you have an appetite anyways, getting your heart broken will do that to you. And it sucks even more because sheâs so nice, like insanely nice, you couldnât even hate her if you wanted to. Not to mention how pretty she was, she was everything, and you were some pimple faced, awkward bodied thirteen year old.Â
You fidget with the ring on your finger and your heart races at the idea of Charles not wearing his anymore, your eyes glance over at him and when you spot the ring still on his finger it calms you a little. But that still means nothing, just that he clearly still sees you as a little sister. What you donât see is how your Mom has been watching you the whole night. Youâve never told her about your feelings towards Charles, but sheâs your Mom, she just knows things. And she knows you're hurting right now, so when she changes the topic of conversation at the table youâre eternally grateful.Â
Itâs an early night for you that night, not bothering to join everyone for a game of UNO, claiming that you arenât feeling well. When really you couldnât wait to go upstairs and just cry it out. What did you do to deserve something like this? It hurt so bad, but you knew there was nothing you could do about it. And as you laid in bed that night all you could think about was how are you going to live without him liking you back?
sixteen and nineteen
Newsflash you do live without Charles liking you back. In fact your crush goes away by the end of that year, no thanks to the new boy in your grade, who eventually ends up being your boyfriend. But it was safe to say you were over Charles, at least you think you are.Â
Charles, on the other hand, stayed with the girl who made you go crazy at age thirteen for over a year, but they broke up over text. And to your disappointment, Charles never told you the reason why. Ever since then itâs been somewhat of a revolving door of girls in Charles' life. Okay â maybe not a revolving door, but at least three different girls in the past two years. None of them lasted for more than a couple months though, and it was getting to the point where no one in either of your families got to know the girls.
Everyone knew that they would be gone sooner than later. After his last âbreakupâ a couple months ago, he hadnât brought around a new one, he claimed that he needed to focus on racing, that F1 seat was almost in his grasp and that was all that mattered to him right now, but you knew there was something else going on.Â
While Charles was having issues in the relationship department, you were actually flourishing. You had met your now boyfriend Lucas, when he was the new kid your eighth grade year. You thought he was cute from the moment he walked into your History class the first day back from winter break. And when the seat next to you was the only open desk you tried to hide your excitement as he sat down, but when he smiled at you first, it was hard to hide the blush creeping onto your cheeks. He was the first to speak, asking if you had a pencil. But his accent made your ears perk up â he was Spanish. The big brown doe eyes and dark hair fit him, now that you realized he was Spanish.Â
âDo all Spaniards come unprepared on their first day?â You teased as you handed him a pencil. It was his turn to be the one blushing as he stifled a smile.Â
âNo, I just wanted an excuse to talk to you.âÂ
So he was a flirt â noted.Â
The two of you became good friends rather quickly, but per your parents rules, you couldnât date until you were fifteen. So, you played the long game and prayed that no one else peaked his interest. Luckily for you, he was so infatuated with you that he was willing to wait, and on your fifteenth birthday you went on your first date. He was nothing shy of a gentleman, even going as far as asking your parents permission to take you out, something your Dad was very fond of. And as your parents watched their little girl walk out the door hand in hand with a boy, they couldnât help but feel a little sad.Â
âOur little girl is growing up.âÂ
Your Mom wrapped a comforting arm around your Dad. âI know. Iâm glad though, I figured she would waste her teenage years waiting on Charles.âÂ
A questioning look washed across your Dadâs face. âWhat?âÂ
âOh honey. Donât act like youâve been blind these past ten years. Theyâve always been drawn to each other, her more than him. She was absolutely heartbroken when he brought his first girlfriend to dinner that one time.âÂ
âGuess I do remember being less than thrilled at Charles getting her that ring for Christmas that one year.â Your Dad huffed.Â
âHmm,â she rests her head on his shoulder, her hand rubbing soothing circles on his abdomen as they still stand there, staring at the door. âYou know Pascale has always said that Y/N would end up with Charles.âÂ
Your Dad scoffs at your Momâs words. âAnd what do you think of that?âÂ
âI think only time will tell.âÂ
While your parents were discussing your love life back at home, you were having a grand time on your date. The pizza place Lucas had taken you to was cute, a fitting place for two fifteen year olds to be on a first date. Thankfully it wasnât awkward or tense, and you had to thank the two of you for being friends for a year before your date for that. It was just like the two of you hanging out.Â
On the walk back to your house your hands never separate, even when they start to become sweaty. And when he pulls you closer to him, so you're basically hugging his arm, you realize you could get used to this.The way his brown eyes look like pools of honey when the sun hits them just right as he looks down at you, the feeling of his thumb gently rubbing circles on your hand, and the way your name rolls of his tongue when he talks to you, especially with that accent of his. All of it has that all too familiar warm fuzzy feeling appearing in your stomach.Â
When he stops in front of the ice cream shop near your house he doesnât even have to ask you if you want any, youâre already dragging him towards the entrance. The little bell on the door rings as the two of you walk inside and the all too familiar sugary sweet smell hits your nostrils.Â
âAh! ChĂ©rie!âÂ
The owner Mr. Martin â a short older man, probably in his sixties, with what you would call haystacks for eyebrows was beaming at you from behind the counter. He had grown fond of you and the Leclerc boys over the years, claiming that he loved seeing the three of you grow up, as he never had any grandchildren of his own. Though, when his eyes shifted to the right and saw Lucas standing next to you his smile fell briefly, if you hadnât been staring at him you wouldnât have caught it.Â
âWho is this handsome young man?â He asks as the two of you walk towards him..Â
You introduce Lucas to Mr. Martin and itâs at that moment that you realize that this is the first time youâve brought him here. Something that didnât seem possible to you because you were here so often that you had to have brought Lucas here at least once, but you canât recall a time.Â
Only when a vanilla cone is in front of your face are you brought out of your thoughts. Of course Mr. Martin didnât need to ask you what you wanted, itâs been the same thing every time for the past ten years. Lucas had already sat down at one of the little tables, chocolate cone in hand, while he waited for you.Â
âI was surprised to see you with a boy other than Charles.â Mr. Martin states as he wipes down the counter. âHe must be special because I donât think Iâve ever seen you in here with anyone other than your family or Charles.âÂ
His words hit you like a ton of bricks. Yes, this was your first time you had brought Lucas here, but you know youâve brought other friends here. There was no way in your ten years here that you hadnât, but once again your mind was drawing a blank. As you glance back over at Lucas a knot forms in your stomach, it suddenly feels wrong to have brought him here. Like in some way you were tainting this place with his presence. Ruining whatever special hold this place has on your relationship with your familyâ with Charles.Â
You completely ignore Mr. Martinâs statements and just give him a smile and thanks before making up an excuse as to why Lucas and you need to leave. He doesnât take much convincing when you claim to want to see the sunset. His hand is back in yours as you hear the bell ring once more as the two of you leave. And itâs like as soon as you guys are back on the sidewalk walking towards your house, the gut wrenching feeling is gone. The only evidence of it is left in the ice cream and by the time youâre standing on your front porch step itâs all gone.Â
Lucas has a lopsided grin on his face, one youâve grown to love, as the two of you stand facing each other. âYou know we are missing the sunset you wanted to see.â His fingers lightly toy with yours, before finally intertwining them again.
âMmh. Itâs okay.â You were getting lost in those big brown eyes of his, the sunset the last thing on your mind.Â
âIâd rather stare at you anyways, youâre much prettier.âÂ
His words make you practically putty in his hands and before you know it youâre having your first kiss. Itâs sweet, metaphorically and literally, the taste of ice cream still on both of your lips. His hand cups your cheek and you have to wonder if heâs done this before. But when he pulls away he only has you craving more, so you lean up and steal on more from him. Giggles escaping past your lips as you see the light blush on his cheeks, you were sure yours were bright red. âGuess this is where I ask you to be my girlfriend huh? Not like Iâve been obsessed with you since my first day of school, been waiting all year or anything.âÂ
You raise an eyebrow at him with a smirk on your face. âAre you going to properly ask me?âÂ
By the end of the night when youâre laying in bed, you had officially gone on your first date, had your first kiss, and obtained a boyfriend all in a matter of hours that day. You were a giddy mess, excitement coursed through your veins, and you couldnât help but repeatedly feel your lips, the feeling of Lucasâ still fresh in your mind the whole night. You couldnât wait to feel them on yours again. And when he texts you that he wants to hang out tomorrow you think your heart just might leap out of your chest.Â
Being with Lucas was like living on cloud nine, you truly couldnât ask for a better boyfriend. As the year progressed you really wondered how you had snagged someone like himâ tall, dark, and handsome. You felt like the luckiest girl in the world, and he made you feel like it too, until he didnât.
Thatâs the funny thing about first loves, you really think nothing could ever come between you, that itâs going to last forever. But the only thing that lasts forever is the damage they leave when theyâre gone.Â
You arenât really sure what switched in Lucas, but after a year of being together he turned into someone who was never happy with what you did, always picking fights over stupid little things. And you know you should have left him already, but you love him, and you think you guys can make it work. Youâre only sixteen and your Mom tells you relationships shouldnât be like this at this age, shouldnât be mentally draining, but unfortunately this one is.Â
All your arguments as of lately had been about Charles. Lucas, though denying it every time you brought it up, had become jealous of him. You werenât even sure where the jealousy had come from, you barely saw Charles like you used to. He was in F2 on the cusp of getting that F1 seat and you were busy with school and spending time with Lucas. You had even gone as far as rejecting invites to hang out with your other friends to spend time with Lucas, something now you regret very deeply.Â
âââ§âââââââ§ââ
Itâs a chilly Friday night in February when everything comes crashing down. The argument started over Charles texting you asking if you wanted to hang out. You were already with Lucas, but you hadnât seen Charles in a couple weeks and you knew once the season started seeing him would be even more scarce. So, you make the big mistake of asking Lucas if he wanted to hang out with Charles.Â
âWhy would I want to hang out with him?â His back was turned to you, but you already knew from his tone that this was going to turn into an argument.Â
âWell I havenât seen him in awhile and he texted me asking to hang out, I thought we all could hang out.â You thought maybe by including Lucas in the plans that it would make the situation better. Wrong.Â
He turns to face you, walking towards your bed where youâre currently sat. âDid he mention me in the text?âÂ
âWell no but-âÂ
âExactly,â Lucas scoffs at you, his expression sour as he looms over you. âHe doesnât want me to come. I would get in his way.âÂ
You roll your eyes at his dramatics, Charles was not the guy Lucas made him out to be. âDonât know what you mean by you getting in his way.âÂ
âOh donât act cute about it Y/N.â Hearing your name roll off his tongue no longer sounded like music to your ears, it now more resembled nails on a chalkboard, like each time he spoke your name it was venom coming out his mouth. âBet if I gave him the chance heâd try to get in your pants at the first opportunity.âÂ
Your eyes widened, cheeks getting hot at his accusations. âWhat kind of girl do you think I am Lucas?âÂ
âAll Iâm saying is your friendship with him isnât normal, and it makes a guy wonder.âÂ
You were up off of your bed now, the two of you standing in the middle of your room. âThis is getting old. Iâve told you, you have nothing to be jealous of.â You had started to twist the ring on your pinky finger, a nervous habit you had developed over the past couple years.Â
âThat is why your friendship isnât normal.â Lucas grabs your hand, his fingers twisting at the ring trying to pull it off your finger. âWhat kind of girl wears a ring another guy got her while in a relationship? Huh? Even worse that youâve got matching ones.â
Yanking your hand free from his grasp you can feel your blood starting to boil, and youâre thankful your parents arenât home tonight because you can tell this is going to get ugly. âWe fucking grew up together! Heâs like a brother Lucas!â You were the first one to yell and you had unfortunately opened the floodgates because now Lucas is yelling.
âWho hasnât heard that before?! Heâs like a brother. Give me a fucking break. Youâre telling me youâve never had feelings for him? Not once in your life?â Â
The accusations and ideas he was throwing around tonight were beyond ridiculous.Â
âIâm not thirteen anymore Lucas. You know I only love you.â And you donât realize what youâve basically admitted until it leaves your mouth and you hear Lucas let out a dry laugh.Â
âAh. There it is. I think that last part may have been a lie, because you still wouldnât be wearing that ring if you didnât still feel something for him.âÂ
You shake your head at him, why couldnât he get what you were saying though his thick skull. âI only have platonic love for Charles. Itâs nothing like what you and I have.âÂ
He clicks his tongue, and you can hear the gears turning in his head. âProve it.â You furrow your eyebrows at him, confused as to how you are supposed to prove that you love only him. âTake the ring off and give it back to Charles.âÂ
You tuck your hands behind your back, afraid heâll try and rip it off your finger again. âNo. Itâs just a ring Lucas. Youâre giving it more power than it has.âÂ
âIf itâs just a ring then take it off.â You shake your head no at him. âTake it off Y/N.â You shake your head no again and he stalks towards you, causing you to back up until the backs of your knees hit your bed. âTake off the fucking ring!â Heâs yelling and you can feel the tears starting to pool in your eyes. Heâs never gotten this crazy before and you can tell that this is the end of the two of you.Â
âLucas just go.â You're trying to hold back your tears, but when he tries to reach around to grab your hand you let out a sob. âLucas, leave! Now!âÂ
He backs up, and for the first time that night you get a good look at his eyes. They are no longer the pools of honey you once found yourself getting lost in, their dark, like a black void, and he almost looks unrecognizable as he stands there. âYou never truly loved me did you?.âÂ
His words cut through you, because you really did love him, and you thought he loved you. But someone who loves you would never treat you like he has you. âI loved you more than youâll ever know, but clearly youâve got some shit mixed up in your head to think that I didnât.âÂ
âBut you are always going to love Charles more Y/N. You can tell yourself itâs only platonic love, but we both know itâs not.âÂ
You wipe away your tears as you sit back down on the side of your bed, this was getting old. âI canât do this anymore. Truly. Iâve tried to tell you how much you mean to me, but Charles is a part of my life and if you canât deal with that,â You take a deep breath, scared for what's about to come out of your mouth. âThen maybe we should break up.âÂ
And for the first time that night Lucas doesnât respond and youâre actually surprised that he doesnât put up a fight. âAlright then I guess we are done.â When he doesnât immediately leave and decides to squat down in front of you, you're confused. Especially when he wipes away your tears as his hand cups your cheek. âI never wanted us to end up like this, but I canât share your heart with someone else.âÂ
He should be screaming and instigating more arguing, not being gentle and loving. More tears fall down your cheeks as he presses a final kiss on your forehead before walking out your bedroom door. You can hear your parents greet him downstairs, what great timing for them to arrive home, and when the front door slams youâre surprised your Dad isnât going after him.Â
Youâre immediately calling Charles and you donât even have to speak, your sniffles and ragged breathing lets him know that you need him. As you hang up the phone you hear a gentle knock on your door and you see your Mom peek her head in, her heart breaking when she sees the state youâre in. âOh my sweet girl.âÂ
âItâs over Mom.â You choke out between sobs.Â
She does the only thing that she knows you need right now and just holds you, lets you get it all out as she runs her fingers through your hair.Â
But seconds later youâre both greeted with an out of breath Charles standing in the middle of your room. Your tears subside for a moment, as you see him doubled over trying to catch his breath.
âAlright, Iâm gonna leave you two be.â Your Mom gives you a reassuring kiss on the head before exiting your bedroom.Â
Charles takes her spot next to you on your bed, his arm immediately pulling you into him. âDid you run here?â You ask as you rest your head on his shoulder.Â
âDid you expect anything less when you called me crying?â Heâs deadly serious when he says it, and you donât know it, but heâd drop everything to come to your aid, no matter if you asked or not. You donât answer him, but when you wrap your arms around his waist and basically tuck yourself into his side, he knows you appreciate him being here. âAm I wrong for thinking this has something to do with Lucas?âÂ
The tears start to fall again as the fight replays in your head. âWe broke up.â Your words barely above a whisper, but Charles has no trouble hearing them, even over your sniffles.Â
âNever liked that asshole anyways.âÂ
You rolled your eyes at Charles' statement, lightly laughing because he was totally lying. âDonât lie, you liked him, hell everyone liked him.âÂ
âEver thought I am just a very good actor? He made you happy, so I just pretended to like him, for your sake.âÂ
âWish you would have made your dislike of him known, maybe I wouldnât be a hot mess on a Friday night right now.â A sigh escapes past your lips, the feeling of Charles gently rubbing circles on your side had started to soothe you. And you wished you could stay like this forever, wrapped up in his embrace.Â
Charles doesnât mean to pry, he knows youâll tell him when you're ready, but heâs curious as to why the two of you had broken up, as far as he was concerned the two of you seemed happier than ever. But he wasnât going to lie and say he wasnât happy about the two of you breaking up, for reasons unknown to him yet.Â
âYou gonna tell me what happened?âÂ
Your grip on him tightens and he thinks if he let you, youâd be under his skin if it was possible. âHe was jealous of you.âÂ
Charles feels his heartbeat quicken and heâs not sure why, but he does know he wants to hear the whole story. âAnd?âÂ
You know youâre going to start crying again, but it's Charles, you can tell him anything. So you take a deep breath and spill the beans. âIt started a couple months ago. Heâd pick fights over stupid stuff at first and then it turned into stuff concerning you. I tried to just let it go and make sure he knew he was my number one priority. But tonightâs fight was the worst one yet and I just couldnât handle it anymore. He was basically insulating that I loved you more than him and I tried to tell him it was only platonic love that I had for you, but he wasnât convinced.âÂ
Thereâs a strange feeling that blooms in Charles' chest as your words hit his ears and it clouds his mind because heâs never had a feeling like this when heâs been around you. Itâs foreign and it scares the shit out of him.
You hold back some information from Charles, mainly because you were still processing how you really feel about him. Trying to sort through what Lucas had planted into your brain and what might have already been there, left over from thirteen year old you. But your ring clad finger searches for his and when you feel the cool contrast of his ring, you wrap your pinky fingers together. âDo you think our friendship is normal Charlie?âÂ
He cocks an eyebrow at you, confused as to what you meant. âWhereâs this coming from?âÂ
Your eyes never break away from your intertwined fingers, matching rings staring back at you. âLucas said our friendship isnât normal and basically the fact that we have matching rings isnât normal either.âÂ
Now Charles' gaze is also on your rings and for a moment he thinks maybe it isnât normal, but then he realizes this is your guys normal. So fuck what anyone else or Lucas thought about his friendship with you. âThink he might have been just pulling shit out of his ass at that point. Jealous that he doesnât have anyone in his life like we do each other.âÂ
Charles' words do make you feel a little better, because you know no matter what youâll always have each other and tonight is proof of that, but that doesnât stop your still broken heart from showing.
âStill kind of made me feel like shit though, like he made it seem like I didnât love him at all, when I clearly did. I mean god Charles he was my first date, first kiss, first everything. Even with how badly he had treated me these last couple months, weâre always gonna have that connection. How am I supposed to find someone like that again? Fuck. I mean he literally has a part of me that Iâll never get back.âÂ
And Charles can feel his heart tightening at your words, because youâre truly the most amazing girl he knows, and to know that Lucas treated you badly when all you deserve is the best awakens something in him.Â
âI wish you could see how you look to me, how amazing you are. Yes, you have those connections with Lucas, but believe me when I say you arenât going to have a problem finding someone else.âÂ
A small smile finds its way onto your face as you hear Charles speak. âYouâre just saying that to make me feel better.âÂ
âI wouldnât say anything that wasnât true. Youâre funny, kind, the best listener, and youâre so beautiful. Truly Y/N, anyone would be lucky to have you. And Lucas is clearly stupid for letting you go.âÂ
The blush on your cheeks probably looked like a bad sunburn with how much you were blushing and as you made eye contact with Charles you suddenly felt like that thirteen year old girl again. His blue eyes burning into yours and when he tucks a stray piece of hair behind your ear you canât help the butterflies that erupt in your stomach. And for a brief moment Charles had pushed your thoughts about Lucas to the back of your mind.Â
He pulls you into a hug and if there is one place you feel the safest in the world, itâs in Charles arms. And when he whispers into your ear that everything is gonna be fine, you know itâs going to be, as long as youâve got Charles in your life.Â
seventeen and twentyÂ
He had done it.Â
Charles had finally gotten into Formula 1. The thing he had only dreamt of since childhood had finally come true. The long weekends away from home, the training, the tiredness, the stress, it was all worth it in the end. That seat was finally his and you couldnât have been more proud. He had been in talks with a couple of the teams for a while and he always kept you updated on the possibilities, some weeks it sounded like he would sign with one team, and then the next another. The whole situation was beyond stressful to you, so you could only imagine how Charles felt about it all.Â
The day you found out that he signed with Suaber was one youâll never forget.
Charles had tried to plan some elaborate thing to announce the big news to you, but that meant he would have to keep it a secret from you for at least a day or two. Something he found to be rather difficult once he got home, because the only thing he wanted to do was tell you.Â
It didnât matter to him that it was almost midnight by the time he had gotten home from the airport, he was going to tell you tonight no matter what. He pulled his phone out of his pocketâ thumbs moving rapidly as he texted you.Â
After dozing off multiple times in the last half hour you had decided to call it quits on your binge session of The Office for the night. You had switched the TV to something random to actually fall asleep to and it didnât take long for you to be on the cusp of actual sleep untilâÂ
DING
A groan escaped past your lips and you contemplated ignoring it, but when the second alert went off you snatched your phone off the nightstand. It felt like you were staring directly into the sun as your eyes struggled to read the text notification.Â
Charlie: come out backÂ
Your eyes glanced at the time â 12:15. What the hell could he possibly want this late? But you begrudgingly got out of bed, slipping on some shoes and a sweatshirt before quietly going downstairs.Â
The light on the back patio illuminated the backyard just enough for you to see Charles sitting on the swings waiting for you. And If you were even thinking about sneaking up on Charles that would have been impossible with the sliding door to the backyard. The thing screeched like nails on a chalkboard even with you opening it just enough to slide through it. His gaze now locked onto you as you scurried off the porch and towards the swings.Â
The smile that he greeted you with was one beyond measure. He was clearly happy about something and you could tell just by the crinkles around his eyes and those dimples that right now looked to be deeper than canyons.Â
âWhatâs got you so happy, Leclerc?âÂ
Your eyes focused on Charles' frame as he swayed back and forth slowly on the swing. He was clearly too big for it â his legs were bent awkwardly and his swing creaked everytime he moved. You could feel the sides of the swing digging into your hips and you realized you probably looked as ridiculous as him.Â
âJust happy to see you. Missed you.â His smile still ever prominent.Â
You scoffed at his words, he had just seen you a couple days ago. âYeah right. You wouldnât have texted me at midnight if there wasnât something going on. In fact, how did you know I was up or even home? Itâs a Friday night you know.âÂ
âBecause I know you Y/N. Your Friday nights are usually spent at home watching some show until you canât stay up any longer.âÂ
A grimace finds its way onto your face, what an amazing life you live. âOkay when you say it outloud it makes me sound like a loser.âÂ
His eyes had softened as the two of you made eye contact. âNothing wrong with how you spend your Friday nights.âÂ
You wanted to get off the topic of your nonexistent social life and onto the pressing matter at hand tonight â what had Charles so giddy? âSo are you gonna tell me what is actually going on or what?âÂ
He took a deep breath, he couldnât believe he was finally getting to say these words out loud. âIâve got a Formula 1 seat next year.âÂ
A blank expression is all that is staring back at Charles and heâs worried that youâre somehow mad or upset, but thatâs far from the truth. You arenât sure if youâve heard him right, because you think you heard him say heâs going to be racing in Formula 1 next year, but your brain has seemed to have short circuitedâ your heart beating a mile a minute.Â
Youâre able to get out, âSorry â what?!â and when you hear those words come from him once again youâre practically leaping out of the swing and into his arms. The fact that itâs nighttime and people are sleeping is the last thing on your mind as you're shouting excited nonsense at him.Â
His laughter filled your ears as he stood up from the swing with you still wrapped up in his arms. You just couldnât believe it, something he had worked so hard for, dreamt about since childhood, had finally come true. If anyone was deserving of it â it was him.Â
âPutain de merde Charles! When did you sign and with who?â You asked once you had finally peeled yourself away from him and were able to form a coherent sentence.Â
âSauber â I just signed yesterday. I know itâs not Ferrari like we had hoped-âÂ
Your jaw dropped and you lightly smacked his arm. âFerrari will always be there, I promise. And maybe after they see how good you do this upcoming season theyâll regret not signing you. But what Iâm really wondering is why you told me you were going to do testing for one of the teams instead of telling me you were going to sign with them!âÂ
He put his hands up in defense, but the cheesy grin on his face still remained. âI wanted to surprise you! But then as soon as I signed that contract all I wanted to do was tell you. I literally just got home from the airport when I texted you!âÂ
The fact that Charles wanted you to be the first person he told had you melting and the butterflies in your stomach had you thinking about those unresolved feelings you had towards him. But you pushed it aside because tonight was not the night for that to be lingering in your mind.Â
You reached down to his hand and linked your pinky fingers together. The gesture no longer just meant for a promise, but also one of comfort and reassurance. âI do hope you know though how immensely proud I am of you. How proud your Papa would be of you. I knew from that first time you ever mentioned something about becoming a F1 driver when we were kids that you would accomplish it and now look at you.âÂ
Charles' eyes soften at your words and when he looks into your eyes he feels that funny foreign feeling. The one that blooms in his chest and travels down to his stomach, the same feeling from last year when he held you after Lucas broke your heart. The feeling he chooses to ignore as he pulls you back into his arms, hugging you tightly, like someone might take you from him. He knows his life wouldnât be the same without you and that he owes some of this success to youâ for constantly believing in him even when he didnât, for dreaming with him, and for being the light on even his darkest days.Â
âAnd I hope you know that I wouldnât have made it without you. Youâve been my biggest supporter since we were kids, always believing in me, pushing me, coming to support me when you could, and I canât imagine you not being at my first race.âÂ
âOh do you not remember what I said when we were younger? Think I said Iâd have a permanent paddock pass, so you bet your ass Iâm gonna be there.âÂ
A small laugh escapes past his lips and his dimples are back out in full force for what seems like the millionth time tonight. âTruly Y/N. Merci, I couldnât have done it without you. Je t'aime.âÂ
âJe t'aime aussi Charlie.âÂ
His pinky finger finds yours once again and when he curls his finger around yours a wave of deja vu washes over you. And thatâs when you remembered the last time the two were out here together. You were still kids, but you had made him promise not to forget you once he got into Formula 1.Â
Now here the two of you stood, high on the exciting news of him achieving that goal. You canât help that pit that starts to form in your stomach as you think of what you feared at age ten coming true. You try to hide it, not wanting to dampen the mood, and you know all you can do is pray that he keeps his promise.Â
âââ§âââââââ§ââ
That following March you make the trip to Australia with the Leclercâs and your family and itâs everything you could have ever dreamed of. Sure you had attended the Monaco Grand Prix every year, and some of Charles F2 races, but you had never been really in the thick of it like this. Maybe it was because it was Charles' first ever F1 race, but the feeling in the air was indescribable. The roar of the engines, the cheers from the crowd, it was something you could get used to experiencing.Â
Itâs surreal to see him in the car, see him flying around the circuit like itâs nothing, because all you can imagine is eight year old Charles saying he wants to be an F1 driver when he grows up in that car. He ends up placing P13 and for his first ever F1 race you couldn't have been more proud. And you arenât afraid to admit that you shed a few tears, honestly you think everyone shed a few tears seeing him finally accomplish that lifetime dream of his.Â
When you see him after the race heâs beaming like heâd won the thing and you could only imagine what he will be like when he actually wins his first race. You can practically feel the adrenaline radiating off of him when he wraps you up in his embrace.Â
âYou did so good Charles. You did it, you made it.â Your words slightly mumbled against his shoulder, but he hears you just fine.Â
âIâm glad you were able to come. Wouldnât have been as special if you didnât.â You donât think heâs wiped that smile off his face ever since he got out of the car and it only intensified as he spoke to you.Â
âWouldnât have missed it for the world.â And itâs true because thereâs no other place youâd want to be right now.Â
âââ§âââââââ§ââ
The next time you see him is for the Monaco Grand Prix and heâs nearly shitting himself the whole week before. You would have thought this was his first ever time in a F1 car with how nervous he was. He knows these streets like the back of his hand, knows this circuit like the back of his hand, but he still spends an unnecessary amount of time on the sim, trying to perfect every little thing.Â
With what little amount of time you see him between practice sessions and qualifying before the actual race you try and reassure him, let him know that heâs still an amazing person and driver no matter the outcome on Sunday. And it seems to have worked because by Sunday his spirits seem to be much higher and heâs got a good feeling about the race, hoping to score some points, and maybe win his home race.Â
But when his brakes fail and he ends up crashing into the back of another car resulting in a DNF youâre heartbroken, but you know heâs even more upset. You know heâs going to be so hard on himself and overanalyze the whole situation, but that doesnât mean you arenât going to try and make things a little better.Â
When you find him heâs pacing back and forth in what little space he has in his drivers room. Helmet still strapped onto his head and his race suit still done up. You spot one of his gloves on the physio table and the other on the ground â evidence that he had thrown them. Heâs so in his head that he doesnât even see you standing in the doorway as he paces.Â
âCharlie.â Your voice is soft and you hope by using his nickname that it may calm him a little.Â
His movements stop when he hears your voice and when he finally sees you standing there in the doorway all he wants to do is crawl into a hole and die. What an embarrassment to have his first DNF at his first home race. Itâs like the gods wanted to punish him for reasons unbestowed to him.Â
Your reflection stares back at you through his visor as you approach him, his shoulders relaxing slightly as your hands find their home on them. You finally work up the courage to flip up his visor so you can actually look at him and when you see red puffy eyes staring back at you your heart breaks a little more.Â
âLetâs get this helmet off, yeah?âÂ
With a small nod given from him as permission you reach your hands up to undo the strap. Youâre trying to be delicate with your actions, but when it comes to taking off his helmet there really isnât a way to be nice about it. And Charles knows because heâs got his hands over yours, aiding you in taking it off.Â
You couldnât help but stare at him as he practically tore off his balaclava and threw it haphazardly somewhere in the room. As silly as it seemed, the indentions that it left behind on his face somehow made him more attractive. Combine that with his hair being a tousled mess and his skin glistening from the sweat (and tears) and post race Charles may be your favorite Charles. You watched even more intently as he unzipped his race suit, letting the upper half fall at his hips, exposing the tight fireproofs that you loved more than you should.Â
Those unresolved feelings that youâve tried to shove deep down for years had seemed to be crawling their way back up recently. But for today you pushed them back down because you were here to comfort Charles, not ogle at him, no matter how good he looked at the moment.Â
He sat down on his physio table with a defeated sigh, hand running through his already messy hair. âIâve let everyone down â the team, my family, myself, you. Maybe if I wouldnât have braked too hard at turn seven or didnât push as hard in the tunnel-âÂ
You moved to stand in between his legs, your hands resting on his shoulders. He was on the edge of spiraling and you knew if you didnât take him back from that ledge heâd be in his head about it for weeks.Â
âCharles. There was nothing that you could have done differently, it was an issue with the car. Which means it had nothing to do with you as a person, as a driver, or your talent.â Your hand subconsciously searches for his, and like itâs muscle memory your pinkies link seconds later. âI promise.âÂ
âA âonce in a generation driverâ would have avoided crashing.âÂ
Ugh. The phrases that the media used to describe Charles were â yes very flattering, but they came at a price. He took them personally and the idea of being anything less than what they claimed him to be took a serious mental toll on him.Â
âYou had no brakes Charles. What were you supposed to do? Bust your feet through the floor and Fred Flintstone it?â You could see the corners of his mouth turn up slightly at your comment and you knew he was backing away from the edge. His hands find their way around your waist and heâs pulling you into him, your head finding a home on his shoulder.Â
âIâm still immensely proud of you. Hell, you could finish dead last in every race and Iâd still be your number one fan.â This time there is an actual smile that washes across Charles face, but you donât get to see it, your head is still resting on his shoulder. â And I know itâs easier said than done, but please try not to be so hard on yourself, especially when it comes to things out of your control.âÂ
âWhat would I do without you?â Itâs a serious question that Charles asks himself often. Youâve been each other's rocks for twelve years now. Through the amazing times and the horrible times. No one knows either of you like you do each other.Â
Youâve pulled away from his embrace now, your eyes staring back at his. âHmmm. I donât know. Youâd probably be absolutely miserable without me.âÂ
And when you finally see that pretty smile of his, dimples and all, you know youâve accomplished your mission.Â
âââ§âââââââ§ââ
Although after Monacoâ things changed.Â
The first thing and probably the most inevitable was Charles moving out. Honestly, you were surprised he hadnât done it sooner, but in between the Monaco GP and Canadian GP he moved into his own place. Which in theory wasnât a big deal, but that meant he wasnât just right down the street from you anymore. He had gotten an apartment further into the city, which in Monaco thatâs not that far, but you knew it would make a difference.Â
The days of popping into his house and expecting him to be there were long gone. The whole thing really shouldnât have been such a big deal to you, but you couldnât help but think that him moving out was only going to aid in your worries of him forgetting about you to come true.Â
After Monaco your communication with Charles started to slowly lessen.Texts that once were answered in minutes now went hours without an answer or sometimes no response at all. You blamed it on his busy schedule, trying not to think too much about it. But much to your dismay, your worries do come true.Â
Itâs inevitable to you that you are drifting apart when you realize itâs been three months since youâve seen him, almost a month since youâve talked to him. And when you see him make it official with some girl you hadnât even heard mention of after the British GP you feel like itâs just another nail in the coffin.Â
You donât even make the effort to reach out anymore, in fact you make sure not to after seeing that heâs got a new girlfriend. Youâd just be wasting your time and energy. And it may seem like you're giving up on keeping Charles in your life, but really what else could you do? It truly hurts like hell to see the person you care about the most not seem to care about you, but you canât force someone to talk to you or see you.Â
Heâs living his dream, traveling the world, partying, surrounded by stunning women. Youâre still in school, still only seventeen, and not sure what you want your life to look like. It was inevitable really, for the two of you to drift apart, but that little part of you that ten year old you still holds on to, hopes that Charles remembers that promise he made and eventually comes to his senses. Because you know and you know he knows that you two are always going to have that special bond, the ring on your finger a constant reminder of it. And you wonder if he still wears his, but you donât hold on to much hope that he does.Â
Even though Charles and you arenât exactly the closest at the moment you do want to try and attend another race before you start your final year of school and are forced to give that all of your attention. So when Arthur texts you asking if you want to go to Monza with Pascale and him you donât pass up the opportunity.
Arthur filled you in on stuff regarding Charles during the flight, not that you asked, but he knew the two of you hadnât really been talking. And you donât mean to ask about his girlfriend, but you do, and you can see Arthur tip-toeing around his words. âSheâs⊠nice. Iâve only met her once so I really couldnât tell you much. You havenât met her yet though, right?âÂ
You shook your head at him. âI havenât even seen Charles since the home race. So no, I havenât had the pleasure of meeting her.âÂ
âMerde. I didnât think it had been that long.âÂ
What Arthur doesnât tell you is that Charles doesnât know their Mom and him are coming, not to mention you. You only figure it out when Arthur says something about making sure Charles doesnât know to the Sauber team member who gives him three VIP passes. Arthur claims you guys are here to surprise Charles, give him a little pick me up after his last two races were DNFâs.Â
The idea of seeing Charles again after so long already had your stomach in knots, but now knowing he doesnât even know youâre coming makes it even worse. You were under the impression that he knew you were tagging along with Arthur. And everyone knows Charles is horrible at hiding his emotions, what if he sees you and canât hide the fact that he doesnât want you here? A million possibilities ran through your brain as Arthur dragged you towards the Sauber garage, while Pascale went to hospitality.Â
Qualifying had just started and you were thankful for the extra time to mentally prepare yourself to see Charles again. With the way you were acting you would have thought you hadnât seen him in years, but truthfully these three months had felt like years.Â
The roar of engines were slightly muffled as you put on a headset, eyes focused on the monitor in front of you. Even with your nerves through the roof, it felt good to be back at a race. The atmosphere was intoxicating, you loved the hustle and bustle of it all, the adrenaline you got from just being here was crazy.Â
You were so engrossed in watching Charles that you didnât even notice someone come up behind Arthur and you until you felt him tap your shoulder. When you turn around the person standing there is the last person you expected to be seeing. Â
Leahâ Charles' girlfriend. Â
Her lips are moving, but you arenât hearing a word, and thatâs when you realize youâve still got your headset on. You quickly pull them down around your neck just in time to hear her say. âYou must be Y/N?â You're shocked she knows who you are and from the look on your face she knows exactly what youâre thinking. âCharles has mentioned you before. Itâs nice to finally meet you!âÂ
Itâs sad to say that you had a hard time believing that Charles talked about you to her, but you put on a fake smile and accepted her invitation for a hug. âItâs nice to meet you too!â While Arthur and her spoke you tried to get a good read on her, but it was hard to tell if she was naturally this friendly or if it was all just an act.Â
Time slipped away as the three of you chatted and you hadnât realized Q1 was over and that Charles hadnât made it into Q2 until you saw Leahâs eyes widened at something behind you. That something turned out to be someone and that someone turned out to be Charles. Leahâs practically hanging off of him while sheâs trying to take a million photos and videos. And thatâs when you know why Arthur tiptoed around his words about her earlier. Yes she was âniceâ, but she was clearly using Charles for her own benefit.Â
Charles on the other hand was oblivious to Leah shoving her phone in his face. His vision had zeroed in on you from the moment he entered the garage, even with your back turned to him he could spot you in a crowd of hundreds. When you finally turned around he felt like his feet had been cemented to the ground. His body felt hot, like a fever was running through his veins, and it wasnât from being in the car moments ago.Â
Arthur wasnât supposed to be here and you werenât eitherâ especially talking to his girlfriend. It throws him for a loop and he canât seem to get his brain and mouth to work together to even greet you, so he stands there while Leah makes sure everyone knows sheâs dating a Formula 1 driver.Â
The tight lipped smile you throw his direction doesnât help how heâs feeling. You should be beaming at him, in his personal space (preferably in his arms), laughing at something dumb he said, anything other than how you were right now. And he knows it's no fault but his own, but it still hurts to see you stand there and act like you donât like him, like you havenât known each other for twelve years.
Charles could blame his absence in your life on his career, but that wasnât the whole truth.Â
He had seen your texts and truthfully sometimes he was so busy that he would forget to text you back. But those times when he could give you his full attention over text or the occasional facetime were times he never took for granted. He loved hearing your laughter, seeing your smile, or even just having you send him a text about your day. But with those things he loved so dearly came that funny feeling in his chest.Â
The same feeling that he first felt last year when Lucas broke up with you, the night he told you he made it into F1, at his home race, and sprinkled in occasionally at other times. He had realized what it was not too long after the Monaco GP and at first he denied it, he thought there was no way it was possible. But then when that feeling would happen just from getting a text from you he knew he was fucked. He wasnât even going to say the word out loud, not even think it, afraid of what might come if he even allowed the universe the satisfaction of him accepting what he was feeling. You were supposed to be his best friend and not someone he had feelings for.Â
So what did he do to combat this insane revelation he had found out about himself?Â
Distance himself.Â
If he wasnât in contact with you or seeing you, then surely this silly little thing, that he once again would not acknowledge by its government name, would go away. Plus his ever so busy career was the perfect excuse for him to use in case his Mother or you questioned him.Â
And at first it wasnât hard at all, he had gradually weaned himself off from facetiming you and then texting. And it wasnât that bad because he had racing and training and media duties and partiesâ all the stuff that his life involved now to distract him. But then your texts became less and less and then on one off week he realized just how badly he missed having your stupid contact photo pop up on his phone and how he may have fucked everything up.Â
But then he met Leah through another driverâs girlfriend and he had her to distract him even more. He knew what kind of person she was from the get go, but he was basically using her too, so if she wanted to make her whole instagram about him then so be it as long as his brain was free of that thing that must not be named about you. And Leah worked for awhile, she was relatively nice and it helped that she was pretty, but she wasnât you.Â
There was no real connection between them and sometimes Charles would rather watch paint dry than have a conversation with her. And most of the time he just let her sit there and talk while he scrolled on his phone, trying not to act like his heart didnât skip a beat when a post of yours would pop up on Instagram.Â
He wanted to contact you so badly, but what was he supposed to say? Hey, I've been so busy that I haven't even picked up my phone to text you hi.Â
He knew he had caused some damage to your relationship when his Mom asked why he wasnât coming home to see you anymore and that you werenât yourself. He feels like shit about it, the idea of him making you upset is practically nightmare fuel for Charles and he doesnât know why he thought distancing himself would make things better, they had just made things worse. Made him miss you even more without even realizing it.Â
Clearly Charles had never heard the saying distance makes the heart grow fonder because if he had then maybe he wouldnât have been stood there like a fool in the Sauber garage right now. Heart racing faster than the car he just got out of at the sight of you standing here in front of him for the first time in three months.Â
What the hell was happening to him? What was this sudden effect you had on him? Had it always been there and he hadnât realized it until now? He couldnât think straight â it was clearly not a good idea to have tried to ignore these realizations (feelings) he had about you. A bad idea to not see you for months because now that you are here everything is rushing back up to the surface 10x worse than before.Â
âLong time no see stranger.â Your voice brings him back to reality, but your closer proximity has him searching for an out. His head glancing in every direction for someoneâ his race engineer, one of the mechanics, Leah, anybody to distract him from you.Â
When his search comes up short he resorts to making his stomach hurt even more by talking to you.Â
âYeah. How have you been?â God. Did he not even know how to talk to you anymore? Small talk with someone you know better than yourself had to be a torture method used by government agencies.Â
âIâve been good.â Lie, but he didnât need to know that. âI see youâve been living it up since I saw you last.âÂ
You were expecting a little awkwardness between the two of you, but the way Charles was acting was insane, it was like it was your first time meeting or something. He couldnât maintain eye contact to save his life and honestly looked like heâd rather be someplace else at the moment. Your fear of him not wanting you here was clearly not a silly worry, it was reality.Â
âUm yeah. Always busy doing something recently.âÂ
Youâve been fidgeting with the ring on your pinky finger the whole time and your movements catch Charles' gaze. His eyes immediately locking in on the silver ring still shining on your finger. Heâs surprised after the way heâs treated you these past couple months that you still have it on, but yet here you stood in front of him with it on, a sign to Charles that he did not deserve you one bit.Â
When he sees you realize that heâs staring at your ring and then sees your eyes shift to his naked finger his heart rate quickens once again. His stomach feels like it's about ready to drop out of his ass at the sight of hurt on your face thatâs then quickly replaced by a blank stare. He canât get his words out fast enough, heâs chewing on his words, mouth drier than the Sahara desert.Â
âI-um-Itâs in my-âÂ
âItâs fine Charles, really. Weâre not little kids anymore. I shouldnât be holding on to silly childhood promises.â It wasnât fine, it was far from fine. Youâre blinking back tears, your words referencing everything but the ring. But itâs a combination of everything thatâs got you upset. The two of you drifting apart, the broken childhood promises, wanting to hate him right now but still being so proud to see him out there doing what he loves, and that damn ring.Â
You felt stupid for still having it on, for thinking that he would still have his on. You needed to start being more realistic, but you were still only seventeen. An age that held so much fun and whimsy, you should be out having fun with your friends, not getting upset over a guy who clearly didnât feel the same about you. The two of you were always going to be at two different times in your lives, it was never going to work out, but fuck there is always going to be apart of you that still holds onto him. Heâs got his fingers dug so deep into you that you think you'll be old and gray and still wonder what could have been.Â
Each word you spoke felt like a stab to Charles' heart. He wanted to tell you that he still wears his ring. That itâs sitting on its designated spot in his driver's room. But once again he canât get his words out fast enough, his brain still hung up on your words for some reason. Heâs hoping you would realize that the reason he doesnât have it on was because he had just been in qualifying, but when he sees you slide your ring off and toss it in your bag those stabs to the heart intensify. He feels like heâs losing everything right in front of him, but he canât seem to get his mind and body to work together to stop it.Â
He feels an arm wrap around his and he knows it's Leah. Where was she moments ago when he was looking for an out? Maybe this situation could have been avoided and Charles wouldnât feel like he had just lost the one person in his life who truly cared about him.Â
âGood luck tomorrow Charles.âÂ
You donât feel like sticking around any longer, especially if you have to look at Charles and Leah. You let Arthur know you're gonna go find Pascale, but you donât leave without taking one last glance at Charles.Â
Itâs a long evening with Arthurâs prying questions about what's going on between his brother and you. All you can do is shrug your shoulders because really you donât actually know what happened yourself, you assumed you drifted apart, but was there something else that happened that you didnât know about?Â
The next day you decide to watch the race from Sauberâs hospitality with Pascale, hoping to get away from Arthurâs never ending questions and Leahâs presence in general. Pascale luckily hadnât pressed you on the Charles matter, but sheâs practically your second Mother and she knows too that thereâs something going on between Charles and you, sheâs known from the beginning.
Charles ended up placing eleventh, which is miles better than his last two races, which were DNFs. Though you donât even bother to go to the garage with Pascale, opting to stay in hospitality until itâs time to leave. It may have been petty of you, but you really werenât in the mood to see Charles again and from his behavior yesterday he clearly doesnât care that you're not there.Â
But that was far from the truth. In fact Charles was praying that you would show up in the garage this morning, but when Arthur shows up solo he canât hide the frown that forms on his face. The praying then moves onto seeing you post race, but that is quickly diminished when his Mother shows up without you in tow either.Â
Your words from yesterday hung heavy in Charles' mind all last night. I shouldnât be holding onto silly childhood promises bothered him more than it should have. And he wracked his brain trying to figure out what you could have been referencing. It wasnât until he was almost asleep that he remembered a certain promise that the two of you made at ten and thirteen. Sleep was the last thing on his mind as he laid there wide awake staring at the ceiling recalling the memory in his mind.
He was such a fucking asshole. Heâd done the one thing you promised him not to do. Granted he never really forgot about you, you were still clearly on his mind these past three months, but to you it really did seem like he had forgotten about you. Like he had gone off and became this famous race car driver that couldnât be bothered to text his childhood best friend.
God he had fucked up, like truly fucked up, and all he wanted to do was explain himself (without revealing you know what), apologize, and try and get back to the way things used to be. That though, was proving to be easier said than done when you wouldnât even come around. And by the time heâs done with his post race duties youâre back at the hotel ready to head back home. Charles doesnât think heâll ever get the chance to redeem himself and you're left wondering why you even agreed to come in the first place.Â
âââ§âââââââ§ââ
A week later you're at home sitting on your bed, face shoved into a math textbook trying to figure out some formula when your phone rings. Charles' contact photo pops up on your phone and you contemplate not answering it. You havenât had any contact with him since Monza so you wonder why heâs decided to call you of all things on a random Monday. But against your better judgment you press answer and put it on speaker before tossing it back down on your bed.Â
âBonjour?âÂ
Thereâs muffled sounds in the background, but Charles hasnât spoken a word, and you wonder if he accidentally butt dialed you.Â
âY/N.â His voice finally echos through the speaker and you hate the way your heart flutters at the sound of your name rolling off his tongue.Â
Charles had been working himself up to call you for hours, his finger hovering over your contact too many times to count. He thinks he may have blacked out a little when he finally pressed his thumb down on the screen and then heard your sweet voice, hence his delayed response. Today was his last chance to tell you the big news he'd hoped to tell you last week in Monza, but that clearly didnât work out.Â
The big news in question? Him finally signing with Ferrari.Â
The team that he had dreamt of driving for once he got into F1 had finally given him a chance. It was not only his dream, but his Fatherâs dream for Charles too. Many weekends with his Father spent at race tracks had all led up to him getting that initial seat this year and then finally getting that Ferrari seat for next year, he only wished his Father could be here to witness it. Charles couldnât have been more happy to finally accomplish that dream not only for himself, but also his Father.Â
The other person who knew about how badly he wanted to be sporting that Ferrari red and supported him in finally reaching that goal was you. And to Charles it didnât matter if you guys perhaps werenât exactly on the best of terms right now, he wanted you to be the first person he told, just like last year when he got into F1. He sure as hell didnât want you to find out from the press release, so here he was telling you over the phone.Â
âOui?â
âIâve done it. Iâm driving for Ferrari next year.â It feels good to say it outloud, especially to you because you know just how much it means to him.Â
Thereâs silence from your end for some time and Charles checks to make sure you hadnât hung up on him, but the call time is still going. Heâs about ready to say your name when he hears sniffles echo through the speaker.
âAre you crying?â Heâs worried heâs somehow done something once again to make you upset.Â
You are in fact crying, as much as you hate it. Itâs a mixture of happy and sad tears that you're desperately trying to wipe away like he can see you. Happy tears for him finally signing with Ferrari, a goal that you knew he would accomplish with no issue. Sad tears because you wished he was here telling you in person, wished that things were like they used to be, wished that you never developed feelings for him, and wished that whatever that situation was in Monza last week had never happened.Â
âIâm just really happy for you Charlie.â His heart skipped a beat hearing you call him Charlie, it had been too long since youâd graced him with that nickname for his liking. âI told you Ferrari would see what they had missed out on and come running.âÂ
A smile tugged at his lips as he recalled that night on the swings when he told you about him getting into F1. âI wanted you to be the first person to know.â You canât ignore the butterflies that form in your stomach at the thought of him thinking about you, wanting you to be the first to know, but youâre still crying, your emotions all over the place.Â
When silence fills the line and he still hears your sniffles, he knows itâs not just happy tears youâre crying. It was time to face the elephant over the phone.Â
âListen I know things have been weird between us these past couple months and,â He paused, trying to choose his words carefully. âI know itâs my fault. I broke that promise I made you and I hate myself for it everyday.â The idea of him distancing himself from you was the dumbest idea heâs ever had. He wasnât better off without you, he was better with you. His feelings towards you aside, heâd rather die than not have you in his life.Â
âI got so caught up in this new lifestyle and I lost myself for a while.â Maybe he shouldnât be lying to you, but he wasnât about ready to admit you know what. Heâd already fucked up enough, he didnât need to go spilling his guts and fuck everything up even more.
âAnd then in Monza I was shocked to see you there and I felt like an ass for forgetting about you and I was trying to figure out what to say, but you were clearly upset and it was honestly just a mess.â He took a deep breath before continuing. âBasically what Iâm trying to say is that Iâm sorry for being a dick and that I really miss you.âÂ
His thumb toyed with the ring on his finger as he waited for your response and he remembered you still didnât know he still wore his. âI also still wear my ring. I just hadnât gotten the chance to put it back on after qualifying last week.â His gaze never broke from the ring as he spoke. âI donât like that you think I would ever stop wearing it. Gonna wear it till the grave Y/N.âÂ
His last sentence was mumbled, but you heard him loud and clear. Your gaze shifted towards your dresser where the silver ring had sat for the past week. Perhaps you had jumped the gun with your actions last week, you knew he had to take off his jewelry when he got into the car, but in the moment your emotions were telling you otherwise. âYou made me feel like shit Charles. Itâs a horrible feeling to see someone exiting your life in real time and knowing you really canât do anything about it.âÂ
âI know and Iâm so sorry.â He runs his hand through his hair in frustration, and he thinks heâs done it so many times that he might have a bald spot by morning.Â
You feel like youâre forgiving him too easily, but youâve missed him so much. And to hear him finally admit that he fucked up and say that he missed you too has you unfortunately very easily swayed. Heâs been in your life for so long itâs felt like a piece of you was missing these past couple months without having contact with him. So, you forgive him, because you love him.
âI want things to go back to normal, like before.â Youâre standing in front of your dresser now, ring rolling between your fingers.Â
âThey will.â He glanced back down at his ring. âI promise.âÂ
âYou promise?â You asked as you slid the ring back on your finger, a missing part of now you back in its rightful place.Â
âI promise.âÂ
twenty two and twenty five
Over the past four years Charles and you had matured significantly.Â
You had graduated and landed a job that you loved at home in Monaco. It required you to travel a lot, which you loved, but also came with amazing off time and flexible hours. A perk you were beyond grateful for because that meant you could attend the majority of Charles races. You had also gotten your own place, a cute little apartment, and was truly embracing adulthood.Â
When it came to the love department thoughâ Charles was still there.
Over the four years you had your share of talking stages and two boyfriends who both only lasted a couple months. Your hectic work schedule didnât help matters, but neither did your feelings towards Charles that youâve been harboring for the past eight years. You really would have thought youâd have gotten over those, figured it was a thing of adolescents, but your twenties came and the feelings never went. It wasnât as bad as when you were younger, you learned to handle yourself better and your job keeping you busy helped that. The two of you were at a good place in your relationship and you came to terms that unless you were a big girl and confessed your feelings to him, then you were just going to have to live with him at arms distance.Â
Like you when it came to romantic relationshipsâ you were still Charles number one, as much as he tried to make it work with other girls, they just werenât you. He had thought multiple times over the years that he was going to tell you how he felt, but you were either talking to someone or had a boyfriend, the timing never right. So he learned, like you, to live with his feelings towards you. A thing that was necessary if he didnât want a repeat of what happened when he tried to distance himself from you.
So here the two of you wereâ adults who were completely oblivious to how either of you felt about each other for years, hopelessly pining over each other.Â
Charles' career on the other hand was more of a success story than his love life. In the past four years he had accomplished his Maiden win in Belgium during his first year with Ferrari and then his second the next week in Italy. Then went on to win three more races during this year's season.Â
A season with three wins may sound like a great accomplishment, but the thing was that he should have had more than three. To say that Charles' fourth season with Ferrari was stressful was an understatement for the ages. He had never been more happy for winter break to arrive than he was this year. He had started the season out on a high by winning the first race of the season, but life somehow had a way of humbling him.Â
Horrible strategy calls from the team, bad pit stops, and car troubles had cost Charles his chance at the championship. It seemed like for every high he hadâ five lows followed. So needless to say when he saw the checkered flag at Abu Dhabi he was somewhat relieved that the season was over and perhaps making the podium may have lifted his spirits a little too.Â
But that relief was short lived, because in true Charles fashion, he canât get out of his head about the what ifs from the season. He had wanted to just let it go, leave it behind him and look forward to this time off and the new season ahead. But all his brain wanted to think about was maybe if we would have gone with softs instead of hards or pitted one lap earlier or managed his tires better then maybe he would have been still coming down from the high of winning the championship right now instead of sulking about.Â
Heâd been a little distant since break started and you knew he was probably in his head about everything. So when a text pops up on your phone from him late one evening telling you to meet him at the harbor you donât even think twice about telling him youâll be there in ten. If you had to guess what he had planned, youâd bet all your money on taking his yacht out to look at the stars. It was something the two of you had done for a couple years now, but it was usually over summer break, not the week before Christmas. But for Charles you would do anything, even brave going out on the water, at night, during the winter.Â
When Charles seeâs you walk up to his slip on the dock wearing what looks to be the coziest outfit and holding his favorite blanket from your apartment he thinks his heart is about ready to explode. âYouâre lucky I love you Charles. Itâs gonna be so cold out on the water.âÂ
I love you. The words echo in his mind as he helps you into the boat. Itâs nothing new for you two to say it to each other, and heâs under the impression youâre saying it platonically, but god does it sound so heavenly to hear those three little words come out of your mouth and be directed towards him.Â
âIâm the luckiest man alive.â Heâs referring to you and that glimmer in his eye would tell anyone that he was, but you donât see it, youâre too busy getting situated in your designated spot next to the captain's seat.Â
Once heâs got the boat a good enough distance out into the water he deploys the anchor and you make your way out to the loungers on the deck. You push two of them together, making a big enough space for both you and Charles to relax.Â
Youâre already cozied up with the blanket by the time he makes his way over to you, but he doesnât even have to ask, youâre already pulling back the blanket for him to slide under.Â
He lets out a sigh once he gets comfortable beside you. âI needed this.âÂ
A hum in agreement comes from you as you scoot a little closer to Charles, a gust of cold wind blowing through the air.Â
âThereâs the big dipper.â Charles points his finger up to the sky, your eyes following where heâs pointing to. The two of you take turns pointing out what you think are constellations, but are undoubtedly random stars in made up shapes, but it doesnât matter to either of you.Â
The gentle lull of the waves crashing against the boat fills the silence that falls between the two of you once youâve run out of things to point out. And youâve somehow ended up cuddled into Charles' side, his arm wrapped around you, and your head on his chest. You couldnât help it, heâs always been a walking furnace, and when the opportunity presents itself to be in his arms you were gonna take it.Â
It was something that was happening more and more with you two recentlyâ pushing the envelope per say on what your friendship entailed. Cuddling, staying the night at each other's apartments, hands lingering a little too long after a hug were all normal things for friends to doâ right? Friends who somehow while doing these things couldnât tell that the other person felt the same as they did.Â
Love may be blind, but in Charles and yourâs case, you were blind to love.Â
You donât know how long youâve been out here, but you think you could spend eternity out here with him. The feeling of comfort, safety, and the feeling of home that he brings you when heâs around is something you donât think you can ever live without again. Heâs your person and you hope you're his, no matter what the future for the two of you entails.Â
The feeling of his fingers ghosting across your arm and down towards your hand tells you heâs searching for one thing and when his pinky finger links with yours you know heâs got something on his pretty little mind.Â
âYou wanna talk about it?â You whisper, your head still resting on his solid chest.
He doesnât respond for a while and you think he perhaps didnât hear you, but then he speaks and it sounds like blasphemy coming out of his mouth.Â
âWhat if I quit?âÂ
Your body freezes at his words and youâre hoping heâs not meaning what you think, but when you lift your head to see nothing close to a joking manner on his face you know this is about to get serious.Â
âIâd think youâd be miserable. You love racing, you were born to do it, itâs in your blood Charles. All the hard work youâve put in from a literal child to nowââ You shake your head, not even wanting to think about him quitting racing. âDonât be stupid and throw it all away. Youâre just only getting started.âÂ
A deep sigh comes from him, his eyes fixated on your now intertwined hands as he rubs his thumb over your knuckles. âIâm not going to, but there were so many times this past season that I thought about it. I know thatâs crazy to say after I won three times, but god the lows of racing truly are lows. Iâd have a good weekend and then have literally a weekend from hell the next race week. Itâs just a lotâ mentally. Trying to live up to everyoneâs expectations, the teams, the fans, the media, and my own is like a mental prison sometimes.âÂ
You had sat up at this point, and almost like a small child Charles had clung to you, his head in your lap as you gently ran your fingers through hair. You knew he had a rough season, but you didnât think it had taken this much of a toll on him.Â
âAnd youâre right. I love racing and Iâd be miserable without it, but sometimes Iâm miserable with it.âÂ
The frown that had formed on your face moments ago had deepened at his confession. âI didnât know the season had affected you this much Charles. Wish you would have talked to me sooner about it.âÂ
âSorry.â He mumbles.Â
âYou have nothing to be sorry for Charlie, youâre allowed to feel how you feel. And I know you probably get sick of hearing me say it, but Iâm still so immensely proud of you. Like Iâve said before, you could finish dead last in every race and Iâd still be proud. I know this season was a rough one at times, but you won three times and were on the podium eleven times. Thatâs still something to be proud of. So for every time you're miserable because of racing, think about me telling you repeatedly how proud I am of you and maybe youâll just be miserable because of me instead.âÂ
You see the corners of his mouth move up and you know youâve gotten a little smile out of him. âThatâs funny that you think me hearing you say that youâre proud of me would make me miserable. It actually has the opposite effect, so your plan may work, but it would result in me being happier instead of more miserable, which is what I think we want to accomplish right?âÂ
âYes, I love happy Charlie, but I still love miserable Charlie too.âÂ
Heâs sat up, the two of you sitting face to face now, and you arenât sure if it's the cool breeze or him staring at you that makes a shiver run up your spine. âThatâs good to know.âÂ
Heâs still staring at you and even with only the moon as your source of light, those pretty blue eyes of his are as bright as ever, and staring into your soul. And for a split second you think heâs leaning in and you think this might be the moment heâs gonna kiss you, the moment youâve been waiting for since you were thirteen. But youâre completely wrong, heâs only reaching for the blanket as he leans back onto the lounger once more.Â
âMerci Y/N, truly. For always being here for me, especially for tonight. It was nice to finally get that off my chest. Je tâaime.âÂ
You claim your spot back next to Charles and you donât even second guess yourself when you lay your head back on his chest. âJe tâaime aussi Charlie.âÂ
Charles, while he canât complain about having you in his arms and your head on his chest. He can kick himself for that moment mere seconds ago. He was finally going to do it, it was the perfect time, but he chickened out and reached for the blanket instead of using that hand to cup your cheek. He could drive a race car at 230 mph, but couldnât work up the courage to kiss the girl he was in love with. Maybe heâd find the courage sometime in the next four years. But for now he could live with having you cuddled up against him and knowing that even if it may be platonic, you love him too.Â
twenty three and twenty sixÂ
The Monaco Grand Prix.Â
An world renowned event. A pinnacle for motorsports. People from all around the world come to the tiny principality every year to watch twenty of the world's best drivers race around the streets of Monaco.Â
As a child you watched the grandstands go up every year and you dreamed of getting to watch Charles race those very same streets that you took to school. The two of you as kids watching from the crowd, not knowing that some of those drivers Charles would drive alongside one day, even being teammates with some of them. Charles could only hope that one day that would be him on that top step, hearing his own national anthem play at his home race. Â
That one day had yet to happen after six seasons in F1. After three DNFâs, horrible strategy, and two lost pole positionsâ Charles really didnât think winning his home race was ever going to happen. He had started to believe the âMonaco curseâ more and more year after year.Â
You on the other hand didnât believe that the curse existed. You did believe that the idea of one had made Charles be more in his head when the race came around every year, and in a sense perhaps making him not perform the best at times. But no, you didnât believe in the Monaco curse.
Every year you had hoped he would win and sadly when he didnât you were there to pick up the pieces. You knew his time would come and granted you didnât think it would take this long. But the universe works in mysterious ways, thereâs a reason for everything, and you knew there was a reason Charles hadnât won yet.Â
And as this year's grand prix rolled around you hoped that this time the universe was ready to give him what he deserved.Â
You did have a good feeling about the race this year, or at least a better feeling than prior years. It was mainly because Charles had been soâ carefree these past couple days. Heâs usually already thinking about Monaco at the race the week before and the nerves have set in come media day, but this year heâs different.Â
Heâs excited of course, to be at home for the week and to see everyone for more than a couple days, but during the days leading up to media day he doesnât show you any sign of nervousness or doubt. And you canât help but think that this year is the year, he seems to finally be in the right headspace to win this thing.Â
Charles and you had spent basically every free moment the two of you had together this week. It was nice, the two of you together again like old times. You had gotten the week off from work, a perk from your job, and it wasnât like Charles had to travel to another country. So, the two of you took full advantage of the week. Dinner with both families together, hanging out with friends, and just enjoying each other's company filled your Monday through Wednesday.Â
But come Wednesday evening you found yourself at Charles apartment after a long day on the water with all your mutual friends. Youâre absolutely beat and ready to be back at your place when Charles asks you to come back to his, and you want to say no, but the way he looks in golden hour could be used as a hypnotization technique, so you say yes.Â
He claims heâs got something to show you, but the whole car ride and trek into his apartment he wonât budge on telling you what it is. It isnât until he sits down at his piano with a blush creeping up his neck that you know what heâs got to show you.Â
âHave you been working on new music?â You ask with a hopeful smile on your face.Â
His fingers ghosted over the keys and his pinky lightly tapped oneâ the sound filling the room. âFor a while now and I think itâs finally ready.â The blush had made its way onto his cheeks and heâs fidgeting with his bracelets as he makes eye contact with you. âSo, I think itâs only right that the person that itâs for should get to hear it first.âÂ
Your eyes widened in surprise and now youâve both got crimson painted cheeks. âYou wrote a song for me?!âÂ
âYeah.â He states sheepishly.Â
Youâve always loved hearing Charles play the piano. There were many late nights spent where you sat in his apartment and just listened to him mess around on the piano. Those nights were shamelessly some of your favorite moments with Charles, it was like the world didnât exist and it was just you two and the piano. So to know that he thought and even cared enough about you to write you something had your heart about ready to leap out of your chest.Â
âWell, let's hear it then.â You sat down on your usual spot on the couch and eagerly waited for the music to hit your ears.Â
He hesitates at first, his fingers slightly slipping on the keys, but once he gets himself sorted the sound that comes from that piano nearly brings tears to your eyes. Itâs beautiful and heartfelt and you canât believe he wrote something like this while he was thinking of you. Itâs tugging at those feelings youâve still got for him after ten years and you try not to get your hopes up that this means he feels the same as you.Â
When the song is over his head immediately turns to you for reassurance, but all he sees is your body barreling towards him. Youâve got your arms around him before he can even process whatâs happening, but from your excited words of nonsense he knows you loved it.Â
âOh mon dieu!â Is the first coherent thing youâre able to get out.Â
âI take it you liked it?âÂ
âLiked it? I loved it Charlie! It was beautiful and the fact that it was for me made me love it even more. Truly what did I ever do to deserve someone like you in my life? Merci a million times.âÂ
âIâm glad you loved it. Iâve been working on it for months, wanted to get it perfect in time to show you now.âÂ
Youâre both beaming at each other and to anyone from the outside looking in, the two of you looked so in love it was crazy. Crazy that the both of you have been harboring feelings for each other for years and years and neither of you have made the first move.Â
âWill you play me some more?â You try to give him your best puppy dog eyes and of course he canât say no to you, puppy dog eyes or not. You give him one last hug as a thank you before you sit back down on the couch and let the melodic sounds soothe you. In fact it soothes you so much that combined with the tiredness from being on the boat all day you end up eventually falling asleep.Â
You donât even realize youâve fallen asleep until you feel Charles gently shaking you awake telling you that is time for bed. Itâs not uncommon for the two of you to spend the night at one anotherâs places. Youâve spent many nights in Charles' guest bedroom after drunken nights out or sometimes just for fun. Youâre clinging to him, still basically asleep, as he helps you walk towards what you think is the guest bedroom, but itâs his.Â
Charles was only going to grab your pajamas that you had left here last time, they were just in the laundry basket on his dresser and it would just take a second. But you followed him into his room still thinking it was the guest room and Charles doesnât even know youâve come in behind him until he turns around to see you crawling into his bed.
That all too familiar feeling starts to bloom in his chest as he sees you curled up and comfortable in his bed. Heâd want nothing more than to climb in next to you and hold you all night, but he knows the guest room is his room tonight. Charles doesnât even make it two steps before you call out his name. When he turns around heâs not expecting to see you lying there staring at him with those sleepy eyes, comforter pulled back as you pat the empty spot next to you. He knows he shouldnât, this is different than cuddling on the couch or sharing beds as kids, it feels different at least. But against his better judgment he climbs in next to you and like heâs your missing puzzle piece you instantly slide into Charles arms.Â
Itâs like home, being in each otherâs embrace.Â
The next morning when you wake up in Charles' room it takes you a minute to remember everything, but the blush that creeps onto your face at the memory of you and Charles cuddling in his bed is embarrassingly bad. And you thank god Charles isnât next to you right now to see it.Â
You do wonder where heâs gone though. Heâs not in the living room or kitchen, and itâs still too early for him to have left for media day, but then you hear complaining coming from the bathroom.Â
âMaman! No, that's going to be too short!âÂ
As you peek around the door frame you find Pascale cutting Charles' hair, a tradition the two of them have had every year before the Monaco GP.Â
âCharles last time I checked youâre not a hair stylist, let your Maman do her job.â You teased as you finally entered the bathroom and you see him roll his eyes at you in the mirror.
Pascale lights up at the sight of you and leans over to give you a quick kiss on the cheek. âMon amour, youâre here early.â The look on her face tells you she knows you spent the night, but itâs not like itâs something new or anything happened. Hell even if she didnât know she could definitely tell you had just rolled out of bed.Â
âI spent the night. Fell asleep after we were out on the boat all day.â You shrugged your shoulders, it truly was no big deal (you sleeping in his bed and cuddling with him aside).Â
She doesnât say anything, but she does nothing to hide the smile on her face and sly looks she gives you and Charles the whole time sheâs cutting his hair. Sheâs been waiting for the prophecy to fulfill itself forever and that prophecy just so happens to be Charles and you ending up together. Call it Motherâs intuition, but sheâs known you two were made for eachother since you were kids. If you didnât end up together soon she was going to have to do her own plotting to get you two to fess up about your feelings.
Pascale can see how you two look at each other, how Charlesâ eyes light up when you enter the room. How youâve always been his soft spot since you were little kids. The way you speak about Charles like heâd hung the stars and the moon in the sky. She knew you fell first and Charles a couple years later. All these little things sheâs noticed and stored away for that eventual wedding day.Â
You can see Charles staring at you through the mirror and itâs making you squirm, his eyes burning into you. âYou gonna get rid of that facial hair too?â You try to get him to focus on anything other than you at the moment.Â
His mouth opens in fake shock and Pascale curses him for moving. âIâm actually thinking of growing a full beard.âÂ
âOh please donât.â
âââ§âââââââ§ââât.âÂ
Charles and you donât speak about you spending the night in his bed or in his arms. In fact you donât see him again until qualifying on Saturday where he puts it on pole. Youâre ecstatic and you can tell he is too even though heâs trying to remain calm and collected while he does his press duties. Heâs gotten pole two times before in Monaco, he knows pole doesnât mean you win, but he canât help but think itâs a good sign.Â
That night you find yourself back at Charles' apartment by his request once again. Which was a surprise, you figured heâd want to be alone the night before the big race. But itâs quite the opposite, he wanted your company, he canât get how good it felt to have you in his arms in his bed the other night and he selfishly hopes it happens again tonight.Â
âFeeling good about tomorrow?â You asked as the two of you sat down for an amazing pre race dinner of pizza. His trainer may not like it, but you two thought it was a good idea. He needed all the positive energy he could get and if that meant pizza for dinner, then so be it.Â
âYeah. The car has been consistent the past two days and Iâve got pole.â He paused for a moment and you can tell he wants to say something, but he stuffs his mouth with pizza instead. You donât press the matter anymore, figuring he didnât want to talk about it anymore, didnât want to possibly jinx anything. Itâs a relatively quiet dinner the rest of the time, he asks about how your job is going and you two shamelessly gossip for a moment about two old friends who recently broke up.Â
Itâs not until youâre putting the leftover pizza into the fridge that he brings up tomorrow again.Â
âIt feels right this time.â Heâs leaning against the counter, eyes trained on you as you turn back around to face him. âI mean tomorrowâ it feels right. I think itâs gonna happen.âÂ
A smile tugs at the corners of your mouth as you move to lean against the counter next to him. âI think so too. Youâve been different too, more relaxed this week. Think it might be the universe telling us itâs finally gonna happen?âÂ
A deep sigh comes from Charles. âMon dieu I hope so.âÂ
You glance over at the time on the microwaveâ 11:00 p.m. Shit. You didnât think it was that late already.Â
âItâs getting late Charles. You should be in bed and I should be heading home. Itâs a big day tomorrow.â You go to give him a hug goodbye, but heâs just staring at you, and it throws you for a loop. âWhatâs wrong?âÂ
He swallows hard, his adamâs apple bobbing in his throat. Was he sure he wanted to ask you this? Would it make things weird? It never has before when heâs asked you, but this time felt different. Fuck his palms were drenched in sweat and he could feel his heart beat racing.Â
âUmâ well you could just spend the night if you wanted toâÂ
You try not to act like you werenât silently hoping the whole night that heâd ask you to stay. You had figured he wouldnât want you to again after you basically invaded his bed the other night, so hearing him tell you to stay made you a little giddy.Â
âTraffic is a nightmare this time of yearâŠâ You act like you're weighing your options while you fully know youâre going to say yes. âProbably take me twice as long to get home, even at this time of night.â You fake ponder some more, really putting on a show. âYeah I guess Iâll spend the night.âÂ
He tries to hide the smile on his face when he hears you finally accept his offer and as much as he would like to stay up and talk some more, he really did need to be getting to bed. âWell, I probably should be in bed by now. So Iâll see you in the morning, yeah?âÂ
âYeah. I should go to bed too.âÂ
So you follow him down the hall towards the bedrooms. When he reaches his room he opens the door, but lingers in the doorway. You being a couple paces behind him, figured he was just waiting to tell you goodnight. But when you reach the guest room, which is across from his room, he doesnât say anything to you. Your hand lingers above the door knob and something inside of you tells you not to open itâ to turn around instead.Â
Youâre met with his piercing blue eyes staring at you as you turn around. His gaze sometimes could be so intense, but this time you matched him. There was an obvious tension in the air, but neither of you were brave enough to be the one to break it. Then suddenly you see Charles nod his head towards his room before finally going past the doorway. Heâd left the door open behind him and you knew that was just another unspoken invitation. And like a moth to a flame you followed behind him, not even second guessing your actions. You hadnât even opened the guest bedroom door, you were a goner as soon as he asked you to spend the night.Â
For the second time in a week the two of you shared the same bed, not sexually, but it definitely wasnât friendly or at least how normal friends would share a bed. But tonight heâs in your arms, your fingers lightly combing through his hair as he rests his head on your stomach. He falls asleep rather quickly, his light snores filling the room, but sleep evades you that night. Your heads a mess, you canât help but think that Charles has to feel the same way as you, thereâs just no way that he doesnât.Â
What man is this intimate with someone in a non sexual way and doesnât have the slightest bit of feelings for them? But then your heart breaks at the idea of him just stringing you along and you know youâve got to set up some boundaries to protect yourself. Unfortunately you were never going to be the one to admit how you felt first, so unless he spills his guts, then this was the last time youâd share a bed with Charles like this.Â
The next morning heâs already gone and at the track by the time you wake up and when you grab your phone from the nightstand you see heâd sent you a text.Â
Charlie: i left early this morning and you just looked too peaceful to wake up before i left. so iâll see you before lights out.Â
A sigh escaped past your lips as you tossed your phone on the bed, today was going to be a long day.Â
You made the journey back to your apartment to get ready and then fought the traffic again to get down to the circuit. The hustle and bustle distracts your brain from continuing your spiral session from last night, something you were grateful for. You were here to cheer on and support Charles, not go into a frenzy once again about whether or not he likes you.Â
A good amount of your time is spent in Ferrariâs hospitality chatting with everyone and discussing potential outcomes for the race. You donât end up seeing Charles until the time between the drivers parade and race time. Heâs in his drivers room when you find him and heâs literally the calmest youâve ever seen him before a race.Â
His face lights up when he sees you and heâs immediately pulling you in for a hug. âDidnât think you were gonna come for a second. Weâve usually seen each other by now.âÂ
âYou know I wouldnât miss it for the world. Just got caught up talking to everyone and you know how our Moms get in a large group. I had to wrangle them in before they invited everyone over for dinner tonight.âÂ
âWell I donât plan on being home for dinner tonight. Iâm going to be out celebrating.â Heâs got a cheeky grin on his face as speaks.Â
You laughed lightly at his new found confidence. âOh someone is sure of themself.âÂ
He only laughs along with you, as the two of you sit down on his physio table.
The two of you chat some more about random things, like if heâs planning on going to Jimmyâz or someplace else tonight. You donât even realize how long youâve been talking until he gets a knock on his door letting him know itâs twenty minutes till lights out. Before you leave you stand in front of him, holding out your ring clad pinky finger and like a natural reflex Charles wraps his around yours, pulling them close to his chest.Â
âYouâre gonna do great and when you take that top step on the podium Iâm gonna be there front and center cheering you on.âÂ
âYou better be.â Heâs serious, he doesnât want to win this thing if you aren't right there alongside him.
âI promise Charlie.âÂ
âââ§âââââââ§ââ
You think you might pass out or throw up when the lights go out and the race finally begins. It then turns into thinking youâre going to do both when thereâs a red flag not even halfway through the first lap. Your mind automatically goes straight to Charles and your stomach churns at the idea of him being hurt, screw the win, all that mattered to you was that he was okay. Thankfully heâs not involved in the crash, but the red flag lasts for what seems forever. And eventually you have to endure the start of the race again.Â
Youâre a nervous wreck the whole race, but you think with how hard Pascale has been gripping your hand that she might be more nervous than you. Itâs the longest 78 laps of your life and youâre praying he can maintain the lead, put a big enough gap between Oscar that he can just ride this race out. Lap by lap heâs holding steady but that just makes you more nervous. The knot in your stomach grows more and more as that lap number gets closer to 78.Â
Heâs driven so well the whole time you couldnât have been more proud. Youâd been holding back tears since lap 68, but when you hear him over the radio on lap 75 say that heâs just going to bring it home you canât help but let a couple tears fall. And by now you know the win is his. Heâs got almost a nine second lead and as long as he keeps his head clear he was going to be the first one to see the checkered flag.Â
The feeling of seeing Charles cross the finish line and knowing he had won was indescribable. The whole Ferrari unit was going crazy, already rushing down to be there when Charles got out of the car. Youâre cheering as tears run down your face, your Mom and Pascale hugging you, the two of them also in tears. Itâs surreal, him finally winning, you can only imagine what heâs feeling like right now. You waste no time in heading over to get the best spot to watch the podium ceremony. Youâre front and center, the metal barrier pressed up against your abdomen as more people fill the crowd behind you.Â
The feeling you got seeing him come out, take that top step, and proudly hold that trophy was something you wished you could feel forever. To see him wrapped up in the Monaco flag as the anthem played, the visible weight taken off of his shoulders. You were so unbelievably proud of him and so utterly in love with him. The tears just wouldnât stop coming as you watched him shine up there. The universe had finally decided that this was his time, he was destined to win this race today.Â
Charles feels on top of the world as he looks down at everyone in the crowd, he canât believe heâd finally won his home race. Heâd immediately spotted you as soon as he took that top step and he could see how happy you are for him, tears streaming down your face paired with that beaming smile. His heart has never felt as full as it does right now. And as he stands there hearing his national anthem play at his home race he knows that today was meant to be. The universe put him here, put you here, for a reason. Heâs tired of pretending like his life wouldnât be better without you being his. The two of you havenât broken eye contact for awhile, both of you grinning like fools, and he decides that now is the time.Â
âJe suis amoureux de vousâ He mouths to you.Â
It takes you a moment to realize what he was saying, but when you do you think youâre dreaming. Thereâs no way he just admitted to being in love with you right here, during his podium celebration. You pinch yourself just for good measure before mouthing it back to him. And if it was even possible his smile gets even bigger.Â
Youâre the first person he wants to see after the celebratory champagne pop. He canât wait a second longer to tell you how he actually feels out loud. He doesnât care that heâs drenched in champagne or that thereâs hundreds of people around. Heâs waited too long to let a moment like this go by. Heâs pushing his way through the crowd to find you, heâs basically getting manhandled, but he doesnât care, youâre his priority. And when he finally finds you itâs like a scene straight out of a movie.Â
His adrenaline is pumping and he doesnât even think about what heâs doing, heâs just running straight towards you, his heart fluttering when you smile at the sight of him. His hands cup your face and in an instant his lips are on yours. It takes you by surprise, but once your brain finally processes whatâs happening, you grab him by his race suit, pulling him closer to you, deepening the kiss. He tastes like champagne and sweat, his lips soft, and his facial hair tickles your face. Kissing Charles is everything you could have ever dreamed of and more, youâd never thought the day would come.Â
When you finally pull back it feels like the world is spinning and Charles laughs at you being drunk off one kiss from him. His hands cup your face once more causing you to focus on him. âIâm in love with you. Have been for years, but Iâve just been too scared to say anything, but winning today let me know the universe was on my side. And I couldnât pass up the opportunity once again to tell you how I feel.â Your eyes widen at hearing him say heâs been in love with you for years. âDonât act so surprised. I made it painfully obvious sometimes.â His dimples peaking out as he smiles at you.Â
âIâve been in love with you since I was thirteen Charlie.âÂ
Now itâs his turn to look surprised. âWhy didnât you say anything?âÂ
âWas too scared that you didnât feel the same.âÂ
âI could never not love you Y/N. Itâs always been you, youâre my person. I wish I would have told you sooner so I could have been doing this more often.â He pulls you in for another kiss and you think if he didnât have his arms around you your legs would have given out.Â
Never in a million years did you think that Charles would be confessing his love to you after heâd just won his home race. If thirteen year old you could see you right now sheâd probably die. You canât believe the man you love with every fiber of your being loves you back. The universe definitely wanted today to be a win not only for Charles, but for you.Â
He grabs your hand and presses your ring clad pinky finger to his lips. âMon coeur.â Then he presses another kiss to your lips. âJe tâaime.â
âJe tâaime aussi.âÂ
thirty three and thirty six
The summer sun had started to make her farewell to the principality of Monaco, pink and orange hues swirled in the sky. A little boy and girl play on a weathered playset, their giggles echoing through the open air. The sound of a screeching sliding door tells them that their Maman is coming to get them before they even hear her holler their names. âCome say goodbye to grand-mĂšre and grand-pĂšre!âÂ
Their tiny bodies run towards the house and are soon met with lots of hugs and kisses from their grandparents, who they see very often, but it wouldnât seem like it by the way they were acting.Â
âOk, who wants ice cream?â Their Papa asks after all the goodbyes are said and they are out the door.Â
âMe!â Is said in unison from the two children.Â
The little girl has her Papa wrapped around her finger, he just thinks the world of her as they walk hand in hand down the street, while the little boy is definitely a Mamanâs boy.Â
âYou know your Maman and I used to come to this place all the time when we were younger.âÂ
âWe know Papa, youâve told us a hundred times, and we come here all the time.â The little girl sasses her Papa.
âI know but I just like to reminisce.â The man gives his wife a wink and she knows heâs about ready to go down memory lane.
The journey to the ice cream shop is filled with stories about their younger years and luckily for the children the ice cream shop isnât that far away.Â
That all too familiar sweet smell soon fills the parents senses and it brings them back to when they were around their childrenâs age. That same bell on the door dings as they enter and that same old man who should have retired a decade ago is still working behind the counter.Â
âAh the Leclercs! My favorite family. You know Iâm gonna have to start making extra vanilla ice cream just to accommodate you guys.âÂ
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Oscar Piastri if keeping things private and not telling anybody shit about his life was an olympic sport
