I Honestly Cant Believe That The StatementIf You Are Teaching Kids/teens About Sex And Sexual Feelings

I honestly cant believe that the statement “If you are teaching kids/teens about sex and sexual feelings then you should also teach them about asexuality and lack of sexual attraction so that they dont feel like something’s wrong with them and force themselves into traumatizing sexual situations to feel “normal” when their peers start developing sexual attraction and start discussing and engaging in sexual activities “ is a controversial take here and is called “discourse”

Me: OK so I am experiencing romantic attraction I'm sure of it, that has to be what this is

Brain: are you though? are you really?

honestly, if i had a list of things i’d really like my allo(sexual/romantic) friends to do, it would be

learn what sexual attraction is and stop equating it with sexual behaviour (eg how/when individuals participate in consensual sexual activity or masturbation), sex drive/libido (the desire to participate in sexual activity), and sexual function (the ability to achieve arousal, orgasm etc). also realise that asexuality is a wide spectrum of many different people with varying experiences and there are several ways to be ace.

learn what romantic attraction is and stop equating it with romantic behaviour or the desire for romantic relationships. aromanticism is as much a spectrum as asexuality; there is not one Right Way to be aromantic.

in fact, stop equating sexual behaviour with sexual attraction and romantic behaviour with romantic attraction when you’ve already had it explained to you multiple times that the two things are not mutually exclusive.

learn what sex repulsion is and that not only is it a phenomenon not exclusive to asexual folks (though many aces are sex repulsed!) it’s also not inherently phobic. i’ve seen a lot of criticism of sex repulsion and how it’s homophobic (despite no mention of sex repulsion explicitly targeting “gay sex”). sex repulsion is an emotional reaction to sexual content, sexual activity or the like. it can happen for a variety of reasons including trauma.

recognise that asexuals of all attractions (including heteroromantic asexuals) are often sexually harassed online or offline in an attempt to “correct” their asexuality. this can and often does result in corrective rape.

learn what romance repulsion is and that it is likely not exclusive to aromantics only, but is still a thing that many aros do experience. like sex repulsion it is an emotional reaction and can happen due to trauma.

learn what the split attraction model is and why it’s important for a lot of ace and aro folks (and not even necessarily just us!!) to define our orientations. also learn that it’s not inherently phobic.

learn the terms that we use to define ourselves. stop trying to insist we can’t use words to define who gets to be in our space and who doesn’t. stop trying to talk over us about our own terms and insist that this term “really means x” when you know damn well that the meaning and usage of words changes over time.

stop mocking us by taking our terms and deliberately misusing them without even bothering to learn what they mean. case in point: gross posts making fun of the terms ‘aplatonic’ and ‘queer/quasiplatonic’.

stop calling all aces and aros cishet. many of us are neither cis nor het. stop referring to us as cis when we’re not, and stop referring to us as het when we’re not.

learn the ways in which asexuals and aromantics are discriminated against not only by straight people but also non-ace members of the lbgtq+ community. learn the ways in which aces and aros do not benefit from straightness. yes, even the het aces/aros.

actually listen to us. that would be awesome.

thank

bitches be acting like hating romance is a personality trait and it shows

it's me. i'm bitches.

Things You Can Do to Contribute to the Arospec Community

The arospec community is one that is constantly growing! Here are some ways to help.

Post about aromanticism. Any kind of post- your experience with aromanticism, aro headcanons, aro positivity, general thoughts about amatonormativity or being aro, etc. Fill the tags!

Tell people in real life about aromanticism. You don’t have to come out… to spread information about aromanticism casually, to mention it in passing in conversation, to make it a topic that reaches people’s ears… that’s immensely helpful to spread awareness.

Create content. Writing fanfiction where a character is arospec, making art of characters in aro pride clothing, inventing your own aro characters, general aro crafts… these things all spread awareness and bring a sense of pride to the community!

Make an aro blog. This may seem like a big time investment, but it doesn’t have to be. A sideblog where you occasionally reblog aro posts is enough to add some meat to the community! (That being said, it’s still important to reblog aro posts to your main blog, too. It’s good for aro posts to be seen by people outside of the community.)

General aro pride. Just being proud of your romantic orientation is enough to help others accept themselves too. Taking selfies of yourself wearing green and captioning it about your aromanticism, wearing a white ring, painting your nails with the colours of the aro flag, and anything else that shows your pride are good editions to the community!

exclusionists: cishet aros and aces aren't part of the lgbtq communi-

me: