What Were You Thinking

What Were You Thinking

Austin Butler x reader

Warnings - none, fluff

Word count - 2849

a/n - I watched The Bikeriders, so now i'm ready for the benny imagines. Also, I gotta step up my writing game. I hope you enjoy :)

Of course you’re not ignoring him. You haven’t talked to him and you haven’t answered any of his messages or calls, but that doesn’t mean you’re ignoring him, right? Well, maybe.

A couple of nights ago, you and Austin shared a moment after dinner with some crew members and, ever since then you’ve been casually avoiding him. He had been on his way out of the hotel to take a late night stroll to clear his head and asked you if you would like to join him. Thinking nothing of it and needing a release as well, you accepted his offer.

The two of you ended up on the roof of the hotel since no one would be able to find you two there, and after talking for a bit about whatever came to mind, you both just stood in silence as you looked out at the city.

You don’t remember exactly how it happened, but one moment Austin had begun to confess his growing feelings towards you, and then the next the two of you were kissing. It wasn’t a complete surprise because the two of you have grown closer and closer throughout the duration of filming, and you felt some tension between you guys, but you thought you were just being delusional.

Now, it’s not like you didn’t feel the same way towards him because you did – he had you hooked from the moment you first met him – you supposed you just didn’t expect this moment to ever happen. And it’s not like the kiss wasn’t great, Austin was gentle and you felt so safe in his arms – not like you had a list of experiences to compare it to.

When the two of you parted ways for the night, you were on good terms, but when you woke up the next morning everything hit you. Your mind started to race as you began to wonder if Austin had regretted the kiss, or if he had had too much to drink last night which resulted in his confession, or maybe you were just getting pranked.

Then you remembered that Austin isn’t one to drink until getting drunk, and he isn’t a huge fan of pranks, meaning that everything that had happened the night before was real. This didn’t make you feel better at all, though. 

You didn’t have to see him that day because you had a flight to catch your next destination of the press tour, and Austin had some talk show to attend meaning he would be on a later flight. That didn’t stop him from reaching out to you, though, and in the beginning you were texting him back, but then you panicked and stopped.

You had told your assistant everything that had happened since you felt so confused, but she didn’t really say anything except how she knew it all along and how you shouldn’t be worried because Austin was the one to confess his feelings first. 

This didn’t make you feel better either.

You can’t stay away from him forever though because now you’re about to attend your movie premiere in Sydney, which means you have to see him during pictures and the interviews.

Your assistant walks in on you pacing around your hotel room and asks, “Do you need a paper bag to breathe into?”

You stop your pacing to glare at her and say, “You’re not funny.” You decide to look out of the window to distract yourself, only to notice the drops of rain beginning to fall from the sky. 

Great.

“I don’t understand what you’re so worried about, it’s just Austin,” your assistant tells you.

“You mean the guy I made out with and then completely avoided him after? What the hell am I supposed to say to him?” you ask, about to run a hand over your face until you remember the full face of makeup you have on.

“How about a ‘hi’. You’re making this way harder than it has to be, y’know. It’s not like he’s going to be mad at you, I don’t even think he has an angry bone in his body,” your assistant laughs. “Now, can you please finish sulking? The car is waiting downstairs.”

You roll your eyes as you step away from the window and give yourself one last final look in the mirror. You can’t deny the fact that your dress is gorgeous, along with your hair and makeup, making you feel confident and prepared for the dozens of pictures you're about to take.

Your assistant comes up to stand behind you as well, giving you a once-over with a smile. “You look amazing, and I know Austin will feel the same.”

When you arrive at the theatre, there are dozens of fans standing along the barricade waiting for cast members to come over and say hello to them and sign autographs. As you step out of the vehicle, with the help of your driver offering his hand, you notice Austin immediately as he moves down the long line of fans to sign whatever they hand him.

His assistant and publicist are behind him trying to keep an umbrella over his head, but Austin being Austin doesn’t care about the rain messing up his styled hair or his fancy suit and continues to hold conversations as best as he can. That doesn’t stop his team from surrounding him and trying to keep him looking nice for everyone.

You, on the other hand, would like to stay as dry as possible.

The volume of the crowd suddenly rises as everyone notices your arrival, making Austin turn around. His eyes meet yours and for a second you freeze and don’t know what to do. The weather has made him look even better, if that’s even possible, and the wet hair definitely does something to you.

After taking a moment, you finally snap out of it and give him a small smile, which he returns before continuing your walk.

Austin watches from his spot as you walk away, your back towards him. He can’t help but admire and appreciate your appearance, and he can’t wait to tell you how beautiful you are. 

That is, if you actually come near him. He’s not completely offended that you’ve gone distant from him over the last couple of days, but he is confused. He knows his feelings for you are reciprocated, so he’s just guessing and hoping that you freaked out over everything.

Austin gets lost in thought for a second before he hears the girl next to him giggle to her friend because they obviously witnessed the whole thing. He clears his throat before smiling at her and signing the action figure of one of his past characters that she hands him. A laugh leaves his lips at the fact that the thing even exists.

Once you meet some fans yourself, it’s time for the interview and photographs part of the premiere, which you’re not completely looking forward to. Austin comes up beside you as you pose in front of the backdrop for the paparazzi and places a hand on your waist.

Under any other circumstances, his touch wouldn’t be bothering you since this isn’t anything new, but now you’re just finding it distracting. His cologne and natural scent fills your nostrils, and you could definitely pass out. You feel yourself start to sweat and your heartbeat begins to beat faster as you try and focus on smiling for the pictures.

All the while, you can see your assistant standing off to the side and smirking at the two of you.

The thought of firing her crosses your mind.

Then, Austin leans down to whisper in your ear, “You look beautiful tonight.” He pulls away as he smiles down at you, and your fake grin for the cameras automatically turns into a genuine one.

You look up at him and muster up ‘thank you’ before quickly looking away. Austin’s gaze lingers on you for a couple seconds more, before looking away as well. 

How are you supposed to survive the rest of the night, if you can’t even handle something as small as this? 

It eventually comes time for the interviews, and throughout each one all you can think about is body heat radiating off of him onto you as he stands close to you. You feel your face get warm, but that doesn’t mean it’s because of him. It could be from the questions you’re being asked, which you feel are beginning to get repetitive.

Every once in a while, you swear he feels closer than normal, which could easily be written off as Austin just listening to the answers you give.

After everything moves inside, you immediately leave the group to make a beeline for the bathroom – to relieve yourself of course, but to also give yourself a chance to breathe. There’s plenty of time before you have to go on stage along with the rest of the cast – and Austin – so might as well relax, right?

Wrong.

When you finally decide you’ve spent enough time in the bathroom, you leave, only to run into Austin himself, catching you completely off guard. You feel your heart drop. 

He’s leaning against the wall with his hands in his pockets as he watches you step out. His eyebrows raise at you in curiosity, silently wanting to address the elephant in the room.

“It’s kind of weird for a man to linger outside of the ladies restroom,” you joke, not knowing what else to say.

Austin smirks, “I know, I usually don’t do it, but you gave me no choice – since you’ve been avoiding and all.”

Also, your assistant told him where to find you, but he wasn’t going to tell you that.

You swallow. “I haven’t.”

“Oh really? Then what do you call what you’ve been doing for the past couple of days?” Austin tilts his head.

“How do you know I didn’t get sick or something? Or maybe I lost my phone, that happens y’know,” you tell him as you fold your arms over your chest.

A few people come walking down the hallway, and Austin waits for them to pass before answering, “Because you always make sure that you have your phone, and you’ve still been posting on social media.”

Oops. 

“I thought you didn’t really go on social media,” you point out, your eyebrows furrowing.

“That’s not the point,” he playfully rolls his eyes. He’s about to say something when another group of people walk past, some of them entering the bathroom that you two are still in front of for some reason.

Then Austin motions with his head for you to follow him, which you do. He opens a couple of doors and closes them back before finally finding an empty room for the two of you to talk. He lets you walk in first, his hand on the small of your back, before following and closing the door behind you two.

The space was small and had theatre equipment scattered around. You put some distance in between you and Austin as he turns to face you. If this was any other circumstance, being locked in a room with Austin Butler wouldn’t seem so bad.

Austin runs a hand through his damp hair before stuffing his hands back into his pockets. “So?” he speaks up, wanting you to address the situation. 

“So…what?” you ask as you casually look around the room, trying to look at anything but him. You can’t handle his blue eyes burning into your soul at the moment, but then again you never could because it’s Austin.

“You can’t just avoid me forever. What happened to you?” he asks you softly, and you honestly don’t know what to say.

“Hey, I basically shut down after we kissed and now I can’t look you in the eye because I don’t know if what happened that night is actually real. What’s been going on with you?”

Yeah, no.

You feel your ears begin to grow hot and a weird sensation in your stomach as Austin stares you down. He takes a few steps closer to you and moves his head, trying to get you to look at him.

“Yeah, yeah I know,” you mumble. Not knowing what to do with your arms, you fold them across your chest once again. 

“Talk to me.” He takes another step closer, his expression gentle. “Did I cross a line by kissing you? Did you have a change of heart? What is it?”

“I just–I don’t know, okay?” you say, dramatically throwing your hands in the air.

Then Austin’s eyes squint and he smirks. “You freaked out didn’t you?”

A scoff leaves your mouth because how dare he accuse you of something so true?

You shoot him a glare before saying, “Something like that.”

“I knew it. I know you too well.”

Austin comes closer until he’s standing right in front of you, then takes your hands into his.

“Why didn’t you just come talk to me? We could’ve worked it out.”

“Because I don’t know what I’m doing, Austin. Your career is taking off and you're this big celebrity, and I’m just someone at the beginning of their career – a nobody,” you tell him, looking up at him.

Austin’s eyes furrow and the feeling of hurt flashes across his face. “You’re not a nobody, don’t say that. Look where we are right now, at a premiere for a movie that you're the lead in. And who cares about my career, that doesn’t matter. I’m a human just like you. I like you for you.”

“Come on, Austin,” you sigh as you go to back up, but his grip on your hands tighten.

When he’s sure you’re not going to move again, he places his hands on both sides of your face, forcing you to look at him. Forcing you to see him.

“What do I need to do to show you I’m telling the truth?” he asks, his thumb gently caressing your cheek. His voice is low now as his eyes flicker between yours. His feelings about you are genuine and he needs you to notice that.

You get that same feeling in your chest that you felt that night on the hotel rooftop. When the air was silent, and the two of you were put in your own bubble. You remember the way his hands felt on your body as he held you close, so tenderly.

“It’s not you, it’s me,” you admitted, though it was obvious.

“Then get out of your head. Do you really think I would be holding you in this extremely dusty room if I didn’t care for you. You do realize how close we are, right?” he tries to assure you.

How could you not? You could feel his breath on your face everytime he talked. His scent overruled the smell of the tiny room, making it that much easier to focus on him.

“Yeah,” you answer. Your voice is low now too, matching his. 

After a beat of silence, Austin says, “Would you run away again, if I kissed you right now?”

You shake your head ‘no’ because there’s no way you can trust your voice right now. Austin waits another moment to see if you would back away, but when you don’t, he leans in to connect your lips with his.

His lips are just like you remembered it, soft and plump, as he moves in sync with you. Your hands move to rest on his chest before slowly moving up to wrap around his neck. You feel Austin smile into the kiss, and you can’t help but do the same. Austin’s hands leave your face before landing on your waist, pulling you even move into him, making sure you were the only air he was breathing.

When the two of you finally have to pull away for some much needed air, your faces still stay close enough for your noses to barely touch.

You feel like you could just stay here and forget the movie premiere, but the idea immediately gets tossed out the window when Austin’s phone buzzes in his pocket. He keeps one hand on your waist as he goes to dig it out, only to reveal text messages from his publicist wondering where the two of you were.

Right as Austin’s thumb moves to text her back, another two pop up.

“Well she’s definitely not happy,” Austin laughs.

“We should get back before she kills you,” you say as you watch the messages roll in.

“Yeah, I guess,” he agrees as he answers his publicist before re-pocketing his phone, a hint of disappointment in his tone.

As he walks you to the door and opens it, you stop to say, “Just for the record, I didn’t run. I would call it more like slowly taking a couple steps back.”

“Whatever you say, just don’t do it again because I will have to chase after you,” he cheeses down at you.

That honestly doesn’t sound too bad.

What were you thinking to avoid this man?

Like what you see? check out my masterlist :)

Tysm for the tag @austinbutlerslovers !💕

Here’s some lines from an Austin request I’m working on :)

“Put him down,” you laugh.

“Him?” He gives you a look. “You’re stuffed animal is a ‘him’?”

You continue to laugh as you walk towards him and snatch the plushie out of his hand. “Why are you jealous?” you joke.

“Of course not, there’s nothing to be jealous of,” Austin snickers and goes to bend down to retrieve something else out of a box, but stops when he sees you toss the stuffed animal onto his bed. “What are you doing?”

no pressure tags : @ddejavvu @seresinhangmanjake @sansaorgana @cowboybeepboop @missjadesfics @austinbutlermischief

✿ last line tag ❀

sneak peek at my kinktober day 1 piece for patrick currently in the works 🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️ thank you for tagging me! @steph-speaks

pat furrows his brow, sucking on the lollipop as if soothing himself before leaning over and swiping a third of your pile of treats over to his side.

"that was a tax." he says, voice muffled as the berry flavored candy sticks to the inside of his cheek. you can already see it turning his mouth a dark shade of pink.

no pressure tags: @mara-and-its-the-same , @zablife , @blueberrycig , @pacifymebby , @amymbona

Hi! Please can you write a Benny x reader smut where he's got a breeding kink and he just wants to knock her up?

I'm late to this, I know I apologize💀

But yes, it's now in the works :)

Read it here!

A House to a Home

Austin Butler x reader

Warnings - some suggestion, lighthearted, fluff

Word count - 1926

a/n - request: “i don’t know if you’re taking request but what about the reader & austin moving into their first house together? reader is so hellbent on unpacking and getting everything out together but someone has other ideas” - this was such a good idea tysm! i hope you all enjoy :)

“Where do you plan on putting these?” Austin asks, looking over at you with a handful of your knick-knacks in his hands.

“I’m not sure yet, I’ll figure it out later,” you respond as you go to open up another box.

You still can’t process the fact that you’re actually moving in with him — that the two of you are owning a home together. The two of you have been dating for about a year and a half, and it was Austin’s idea that you move in with him.

He had just come back home after one of his meetings, and he had found you standing in his walk-in closet trying to figure out how to organize it. He didn’t even say ‘hi’ to you, he just blurted out the question, causing you to turn around and give him a speechless look. 

You were iffy at first because you’ve never lived with someone else after you moved out of your parent’s house – you’ve never even had a roommate so you wondered how it would be to go back to no longer living alone. You also wondered if the two of you were moving too fast. You were both adults and had been dating for long enough without too many problems, so it makes sense that Austin would want to take the next step.

But, that would mean moving into a large home in the hills of LA, where a lot of other celebrities and influencers lived. Did you belong in an area like that? Did you even deserve to live in such a nice part of LA just because you were dating a famous person, even though you yourself weren't rich or famous?

What if the two of you just happened to break up and you no longer had a place to stay?

Austin had seen the panic in your face and was quick to reassure you that you didn’t have to give him an answer right that moment. That you could take all the time that you needed and he would be patiently waiting for your answer.

How could you say no to a face like that, though?

You don’t say no, which is why you didn’t.

“And this?” Austin raises an eyebrow at you, holding in a laugh as he holds up one of the stuffed animals you packed.

You playfully roll your eyes before grabbing a pillow from his bed and throwing it at his head. Austin dodges it, though, using the stuffed animal as a shield.

“Put him down,” you laugh.

“Him?” He gives you a look. “Your stuffed animal is a ‘him’?”

You continue to laugh as you walk towards him and snatch the plushie out of his hand. “Why are you jealous?” you joke.

“Of course not, there’s nothing to be jealous of,” Austin snickers and goes to bend down to retrieve something else out of a box, but stops when he sees you toss the stuffed animal onto his bed. “What are you doing?”

“He needs a place to stay too,” you giggle as you walk into the closest to begin putting some of your clothes away.

“And he’ll find one, just not here,” you hear his voice say from behind you, but you continue your task.

You manage to fill up the majority of your side of the closest before deciding to take a break and move onto something else. Walking out, you expect to see the bedroom with more decoration, but instead all you see is Austin on the floor, going through your box of books.

“Have you done anything in the past 45 minutes?” You ask, your hands on your hips.

“Of course I have. I’ve managed to read one page from almost all of these,” he answers, motioning to the box in front of him, “and I gotta say, some of these are a little spicy. No wonder you’re always reading.”

Your eyes widen as you quickly take the book in his hands away from him, put it inside the box with the rest, and move the box out into the hallway. You’re an adult and you're allowed to read whatever you want, but that doesn’t stop you from feeling embarrassed because some of the books are really dirty.

Austin chuckles as he watches you. “You know, sweetheart, you don’t need any of these books as your source of pleasure, that’s what I’m here for.”

“That’s not what I use them for,” you mumble as you step back into the room.

“Oh, really?” Austin raises an eyebrow at you, and you roll your eyes.

“Y’know, while you’re so focused on me, you could use some of that energy to actually get some of these boxes empty,” you huff, standing above another full box of items.

“But I’m supposed to be focused on you, am I not?” Austin asks, tilting his head in full confusion.

“Ha ha, you’re so funny,” you tell him.

“Alright, alright. What do you want me to do?” Austin questions, standing up from his spot on the floor to look at the mess scattered around the bedroom floor.

“Stop taking breaks, and unpack,” you emphasize, shoving a box into Austin’s chest. He stumbles back, but takes the box from your hands.

You leave him in the bedroom, heading towards the kitchen for a change of scenery — and so you don’t strangle Austin.

The house is still pretty empty, except for some small things and decor. The rest of your furniture was supposed to arrive today, but everything got delayed. It had upset you at first, but hey, what can you do? Besides, this gives you a chance to fully admire the home before you completely make it yours. 

You head into the kitchen to begin putting the dishware and kitchenware up where they belong. Surprisingly, the majority of it is Austin’s, given the fact he likes to cook, and you don’t really know how.

When you come across a mug Austin had bought you while he’s out of the country on a press tour, you can’t help but take a second to admire it.

You and him both know that you don’t really use them and that you just like to collect them because they look pretty.

Honestly, how did you ever get so lucky with a man like him? What did he see in you all those months ago when he had seen you on set? You were part of the crew, and that day Austin had been invited on set to meet the director. Of course, you thought he was cute, but you didn’t think anything could actually happen between the two of you – which is why Austin made the first move instead of you.

You’re so lost in thought that you don’t hear Austin’s footsteps enter the kitchen. You feel him come up behind you and wrap his arms around your waist, resting his head on your shoulder.

“You told me to stop taking breaks, but look at you. You’re in here daydreaming,” Austin says.

“I get to because I’m actually doing my job and putting things away,” you tell him.

“Hey, I did put some things away,” Austin feigns hurt. “What were you thinking about?”

“Nothing,” you shrug, placing the mug into the cabinet with the rest of the cups.

“Okay, let’s try again, but this time you actually tell me the truth?”

“Austin…” you sigh. You’re not really in the mood to pour out your feelings.

“No, don’t ‘Austin” me. Tell me,” he insists, giving you a light squeeze as encouragement. You breathe out another sigh as you contemplate whether you should tell the truth or not. When you take too long to decide, you feel Austin remove his head from your shoulder and turn you around to face him. He raises an eyebrow at you, waiting for you to continue.

You just decide to say, “I’m just in my head is all.”

That’s all you needed to say for Austin to understand what you meant. “Sweetheart, I’ve already told you several times there’s no need to overthink.”

“I know, I know,” you nod.

“Do you?” Austin asks, dipping his head down so his eyes could meet yours.

“Yes, I do,” you reply, giving him a soft smile to try and reassure him.

“Okay…” Austin squints his eyes, not completely believing you, but he decides to move on. For now. Then he adds, “but just so you know I have no problem reassuring you.”

Your jaw drops as you hit him across the chest, causing him to smile. “And since we’re both doing such a good job with everything, I think we should take another break. I’m tired,” he continues.

You playfully scoff. “Of course you are. How about you go rest, while I continue,” you answer and go to move out of his grasp, but Austin just tightens his hold on your waist.

“Why don’t you join me?”

“Because I don’t want to.”

“Come on, baby,” Austin whines.

“No,” you laugh. You place your hands over his and try to pull them off of you, but again, no use.

“Okay, how about we do something else then?” Austin suggests, his voice getting lower as he begins to kiss the side of your neck.

“I thought you said you were tired,” you recall as you turn your head the best you can to get a good look at him.

“I am,” he tells you. You raise an eyebrow at him, already knowing he’s not finished. Austin then hovers his lips over the shell of your ear and whispers, “I’m tired of unpacking.”

You playfully shove him off of you, and this time he lets you. “Well, maybe if we get everything finished by the time the sun goes down, I’ll let you have what you want,” you offer, suppressing your smile as you move to the other side of the kitchen to tackle some of the boxes over there. 

“Y’know that is a good idea, but I have a better one,” you hear Austin say behind you, before you feel him grab your arm and spin you back towards him. A surprised gasp leaves your lips along with a giggle as your chest collides with his. “How about I just have what I want now?”

Before you could get another word out, he picks you up and throws you over his shoulder, already making his way in the direction of the bedroom.

“Oh come on!” you shout as you're turned upside down. You don’t put up much of a fight, as you allow Austin to drag you away.

“What? I gotta reassure you that you’re what I want,” you hear him say.

Once inside the bedroom, Austin plops you down onto the bed. As you start to crawl back towards the headboard, he just pulls you back down by the ankle.

“You’re such a bad influence,” you point out, your tone light. 

“And so are you,” Austin smirks as he begins to crawl over you. 

Just as his lips are about to connect with yours, you place a finger on his lips as something out of the corner of your eye catches your attention.

“Austin?”

“Yeah?” his eyebrows scrunch in confusion.

“Why is my stuffed animal on the floor?”

“He wasn’t invited. That is unless you enjoy being watched, but I didn’t peg you for the type, baby,” he wiggles his eyebrows at you.

“Ew, quit it,” you lightly give his chest a shove.

“Wait a second, I didn’t hear you deny it,” Austin raises an eyebrow.

like what you see? check out my masterlist :)

Plzzzz god put a read more on your fics scrolling past them when re-checking for new fics takes foreverrrrrr.

Someone doesn’t read until the end lol👀

I have a masterlist pinned at the top of my blog, and I link it at the bottom of all my posts

I’m glad your enjoying my work enough to keep looking, ty💕

Masterlist here for all those curious :)

The Lucky One

Benny Cross x reader

Warnings - jealous!reader, some swearing, smoking, mentions of smut, fluff

Word count - 2351

a/n - ngl I wanted to add smut but it just didn’t seem like it fit, also we need more benny imagines ppl👀 i hope you all enjoy :) — read part 2 here !

“I’ve told you this before, and I’ll tell you again – you are one lucky girl,” Kathy tells you from her spot next to you, nodding in Benny’s direction. “Or should I say that he’s the lucky one?”

You laugh as you follow her eyes, looking at Benny playing pool with some of the other Vandals in the corner. Just like any other weekend, you find yourself in this bar with all the other girlfriends as you watch Benny try to win a game of pool.

From the low lighting of the room, you couldn’t deny how good he looked as he leaned against the pool table, waiting his turn. You felt warmth bubble in your stomach, but you casually dismissed it. 

You definitely weren’t the only one who thought this, though, because some of the random floating girls had their eyes on him as well, staring at his tattooed arms that shined from the thin layer of sweat covering them. Some of them were even bold enough to go up to Benny and throw themselves at him, knowing that he was taken, but not caring. 

Everyone once in a while, Benny would find your eyes and shake his head in amusement from the unwanted attention.

“I think I’m the lucky one,” you smile at her.

“Whatever you say. All I know is that it will always amaze me that Benny somehow convinced you to go out with him, “ she shakes her head in fake disappointment. “What a shame.”

Another laugh makes its way past your lips, causing you to choke on your drink. Kathy wasn’t dating anyone from the Vandals, but she hung around them a lot since she was close with some of the members – and of course because you were always around.

You turn around once you feel a presence sit down in the seat on the other side of you, revealing Benny who is already looking back at you. He wraps his arms around your shoulders as he gives you a wink.

“What are you saying to her now, Kathy?” he asks with a smile as he looks past you to look at her.

“Nothing she didn’t already know,” she shrugs, giving you a sly smile.

“Which is…?” Benny raises an eyebrow at her.

“It’s girl talk. We can’t tell you, and you wouldn’t want to know either,” you chime in before Kathy could answer. She is notorious for saying something that would get under his skin, but it’s not like it's unwarranted because Benny does the same thing right back to her.

Benny’s about to say something else when someone interrupts him. You all turn to look at Cockroach and Benny’s ex, Kay. Well, it’s not really his ex because they didn’t really date, it’s just a girl he used to ‘have relations’ with a while ago and who is a regular at the bar.

You shoot Kathy a knowing look, to which she returns, before looking back at the standing pair.

“Hey, Benny, a few of us are headed out to have a smoke. Do you want to join?” Cockroach asks, as he playfully shakes Benny’s shoulders. He holds out a cigarette for Benny to take, Benny’s ex gives you a smile before looking over at Benny, giving him a hopeful one and wanting him to say yes.

“Sure,” Benny answers as he grabs the cigarette from his friend’s hand before looking at you and asking, “Do you want to join?”

You shake your head at the offer. He knows you hate smoking and only put up with it because of him, but he didn’t want to leave you out.

“No, you go ahead,” you tell him.

Benny nods, before getting up from his seat and following a small group. You watch as they walk away and out the double doors, though you could still see them through the glass window.

“Why didn’t you go with him?” Kathy asks as the two of you look outside. “If I was you and a girl my man used to have sex with and offered him to smoke, I would be right behind him.”

“It’s not like he’s completely out of my eyesight,” you tell her, your eyes still on Benny. You watch as he accepts a lighter Kay offers, leaning down to light the cigarette with it still in his mouth. He takes a deep breath in and then slowly exhales, a cloud of smoke floating out of his mouth.

“I’m not doubting him, believe me that man loves you too much to even give someone else a chance. I’ve never seen him like this. I am doubting that girl though.”

“I’m not too worried about her,” you point out, but you feel your body contradict itself as you watch Kay laugh at something and place a hand on Benny’s arm to keep herself steady.

You don’t know much about Kay, but from what you’ve seen around the hangout, she seemed nice. Well, nice enough. It’s not like she and Benny broke off on bad terms either, they just stopped seeing each other since Benny had decided to leave town for a couple months. And it’s not like she isn’t attractive.

That had always been one of your biggest fears when it came to your relationship – Benny just deciding to up and leave you without a moment’s notice, or just randomly drop you from his life. He seemed to be pretty happy and content with you, though, always wanting to be around you. That didn’t stop that fear from lingering in the back of your head.

You shake your head, an attempt to make your thoughts disappear, and take a sip from the drink you had been nursing.

Throughout the night, you stay around Kathy. The two of you have a couple more drinks as you both decide to play some rounds at the pool table since most of the guys had walked away. Some of the guys you and Kathy did  like were around to play as well. You joined in on some of the bets and even ended up winning some money, but some of the guys got upset.

While all of this was happening, you couldn’t stop yourself from looking out of the window at Benny. It was mainly to admire him, but you can’t deny the fact that you were trying to read everyone’s lips through the glass. I mean, you couldn’t help yourself. It seemed like Kay was constantly laughing at things Benny would say and vice versa. Then again, they could be pity laughs. You hope they were just pity laughs.

Benny didn’t come back inside until the night ended and people were beginning to head home. He said his goodbyes, even to Kay, before coming back inside and searching for you. His eyes land on you near the pool table with Kathy and he makes his way towards you, grabbing your jacket and his.

“You ready to go?” you hear Benny ask from behind you.

“Oh, yeah. I guess it is late,” you turn around to look at him, no Kay in sight. You put the pool stick back in its spot, Kathy doing the same. 

He hands you your jacket before putting on his leather one as you all exit the bar. 

“You two be careful getting home,” Kathy tells the two of you, mostly to Benny as a warning. He rolls his eyes in response.

“Relax, Kathy, she’ll be fine,” Benny says, handing you a helmet before starting the engine of his motorcycle.

You watch as Kathy walks away, heading towards one of the Vandals already on their bikes and asks for a ride home. You give her a wave as Benny pulls off, before wrapping your arms around his waist, hoping he doesn’t do anything too reckless on the way home.

You hate that you feel this way about Benny staying outside practically the whole night. It’s not like it’s a new thing for him since it's common to see some of the Vandals outside enjoying a cigarette. It’s just that you weren’t a huge fan of Kay being in his company, for an extended period of time at that. 

Again though, you shouldn’t care because he’s going home with you tonight and not her, but you still do.

When the two of you arrive back to your place, you quickly dismount the bike and head inside to take a shower, not wanting Benny to see your face because there’s no doubt that he’ll be able to see right through you. 

You hope he doesn’t try to join you in the shower either, since you’re not particularly in the mood at the moment. Thankfully he doesn’t and just sprawls out on the bed and waits for his turn in the bathroom.

While Benny’s in the shower, you decide to go downstairs and make a cup of tea to help you relax – reading a random newspaper while you wait for the water to boil on the stove. Hopefully this will help you get over the petty thoughts in your mind.

“I forgot to ask you, the guys are having this picnic in a couple of days and I was wondering if you wanted to come?” you hear Benny ask as he enters the kitchen. You glance out of the corner of your eye and take in his appearance – he’s wearing sweatpants and a tank top with his hair still damp.

“Yeah,” you answer, keeping your eyes on the paper on the counter. “Who’s going to be there? everyone?”

He starts listing off some names.

“And Kay?” you ask.

“I guess so, yeah,” Benny blinks, confused as to why you asked, but choosing to ignore it. 

It’s silent for a moment, neither of you saying anything next. Then you hear the sound of boiling water, so you move from leaning against the counter to pour the water into a cup, the tea bag already sitting inside.

Behind you, Benny is staring at you with his eyebrows furrowed, sensing something is up and trying to figure out what. He didn’t do anything tonight, at least he doesn’t think he did, so why did you seem upset? Was it because of someone back at the bar, one of the Vandals?

“What’s up with you?” Benny asks with a tilt of his head.

“Nothing, why?” you shrug, giving the water in a cup a small stir before grabbing your newspaper to read again.

“Because you’ve barely said anything since we left the bar, so what is it?” he asks as he steps closer to you.

“I just said something.”

“Oh wow, four whole sentences,” he sarcastically says. “I’m serious.”

You take a deep breath. “I’m fine, I’m just tired.”

Benny doesn’t believe it for a second. He steps closer to you and takes the newspaper from your hands, wanting you to look at him. He was going to get to the bottom of this.

“What are you doing?” you turn to look at him.

“No, what are you doing? What’s up with this little mood you’re in?”

“Benny, please, it’s too late for this,” you roll your eyes and turn away, reaching for your cup. So much for relaxation.

Benny takes that from your hands too, moving everything out of your reach and using his body to press you against the counter. It took him a minute, but he thinks he has an answer.

“What’s your problem?”

“Why did you ask if Kay was going to the picnic?” 

“I didn’t know it was a problem for me wanting to know who’s attending,” you fold your arms across your chest, you glare up at him.

“It’s not, but you never ask about her. So what is it really?”

“What are you trying to accuse me of?”

“We both know what,” Benny leans down closer to your face, placing his arms on the counter on both sides of you. “I just need you to say it.”

“Fuck you,” you stare into his eyes, his gaze just as intense.

And fuck him for being able to read you like a book.

“So it’s true, then?” He raises his eyebrows in amusement.

There was no way in hell you were going to say you were jealous.

But Benny will. “There’s no need for this facade anymore. You’re jealous, and that’s okay,” He smirks.

You just stare back at him, your jaw clenched and slightly embarrassed.

“And what’s even funnier is that it’s because of someone like her,” he laughs.

You don’t say anything, but look away from his gaze.

“Oh come on, baby, don’t be like that,” He told you, moving his head to try and meet your gaze, but you don’t budge and continue to stare at the wall. “You would think that the fact that I’m sleeping in the house with you is confirmation enough that you’re the one I care for. Not to mention the countless times I’ve left you speechless in the bedroom.”

“Benny!” you gasp, shoving him away from you, but he just comes right back. 

“What made you jealous of her?” He questions, his smirk disappearing and his face becoming more serious.

“Nothing important,” you tell him, trying to get him to drop this conversation. You really were tired, and buddy wanted to go to sleep after an eventful night, but it’s Benny.

“No, no, no. Tell me,” He shakes his head before adding, “Don’t make me force it out of you.”

You hesitate for a moment. “She was practically all over you outside the bar, and you didn’t seem to have a problem with it,” you admit.

“I noticed that too, but I didn’t want to make a scene,” he says and you shoot him another glare. “But since you seem to care so much, I’ll remember to make one next time.”

He glanced down at your lips for a second before leaning in to close the gap between the two of you, but you move your head out of the way and press your finger against his lips.

“You’ve got to be fucking kidding me,” He mumbles. “What now?”

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