Yeah My Bf And His Friends Do The Same Thing. They Once Sent A Text Saying "u Pee Hard" (noun) And The

Yeah my bf and his friends do the same thing. They once sent a text saying "u pee hard" (noun) and the worst part about reading that is that I could actually understand what they were saying:

u pee hard => u bee hard => u bi soft => ubisoft

The game company. They were talking about the game company.

"Gmorna, for fucks sake stop messing with the poor thing."

"What? I'm not, I'm explaining highly advanced anti-matter astrothermometrics and analytical autonormative quantum topomathematics to them."

*human engineer having an intellectual stroke*

"Just tell them that you like to steam the unfertilized calcium encased fetuses from their planet for lunch dude it's not that hard."

"They're called 'eggs', Jouor."

“You see human, we use highly advanced anti matter reactors to generate staggering amounts of heat to create steam to-” the human engineer go’s a hysterical meltdown.

Sorry but Disney said no.

ok guys i gotta say it… what’s with everyone referring to Wolverine (Logan) as “wolf-adjacent” when a wolverine is an actual animal… its not a wolf thing guys… a wolverine is a thing all on its own

Flat earthers ideal world be like:

i think we shouod terraform earth to make it completely flat because itd be fun

This one's going down in tumblr history

I had to pee really bad and o forgot that I had just sliced jalapeño peppers and the chef is looking nice at me weird because I’m pouring milk on a rag and running to the bathroom