This One's Going Down In Tumblr History

This one's going down in tumblr history

I had to pee really bad and o forgot that I had just sliced jalapeño peppers and the chef is looking nice at me weird because I’m pouring milk on a rag and running to the bathroom

why can't manatees bounce around on land like seals

a simple reason!

THERE IS NO BOUNCE IN THIS THING. it’s just bones. open bones.

seal and sea lion skeleton for comparison:

LESS BONES!! MORE BOUNCE

Hi muts I love u thank u for being friends with me

Yeah my bf and his friends do the same thing. They once sent a text saying "u pee hard" (noun) and the worst part about reading that is that I could actually understand what they were saying:

u pee hard => u bee hard => u bi soft => ubisoft

The game company. They were talking about the game company.

I woke up today in a shitty mood and agreed to let myself be late for work (they won't notice) and when I finally came downstairs after coaxing myself to have breakfast, I saw this little star of reflected sunlight distorted off some surface somewhere and thought it was nice.

Flat earthers ideal world be like:

i think we shouod terraform earth to make it completely flat because itd be fun