It Shows How Little Terfs And Other Transphobes Care About Intersex People When We Cannot Even Refer

it shows how little terfs and other transphobes care about intersex people when we cannot even refer to ourselves as intersex without a) them insisting on saying we are people with dsds and saying or implying that being intersex doesn’t actually exist or b) needing to know our entire medical history to decide if we are intersex enough in their dyadic opinion

listen to intersex people. I'm so tired of the perisex community talking over us, and notice I said us. I'm not going to have my intersex identity erased because of what perisex people say anymore, I refuse to go away because it scares them that a common condition falls under the intersex umbrella. Their intersexism doesn't change the fact that intersex people exist, no matter how many ways they try to erase us.

Not to be an annoying activist or anything, but I honestly really don't appreciate Kat Blaque, a PERISEX person, talking over intersex people because of what the infamously intersexist medical field has to say about PCOS. 'Doctors say that PCOS isn't an intersex condition' yeah and doctors have said that homosexuality is an illness. The medical field ain't perfect and can fuck up and grow.

I did NOT get put on hormones at 13 to 'fix' myself just for some perisex person to come along and say I'm not intersex because I don't have a medically recognized variation, despite the fact that things like CAH get misdiagnosed as PCOS and vice versa all the fucking time. Maybe we should take what the medical field says with a grain of salt and listen to actual members of communities. :/

I'm rarely into binary men in real life enough to want to even date them, but since I'm like. 5% into men on a good day that erases my lesbianism I guess/sar. god forbid I'm strongly panaesthetic too 💀

oh, and god forbid I identify as a trans man while being a lesbian. I'm just man adjacent but I guess that makes me an evil male fetishizing lesbians because I *checks notes* refer to myself as a man and a lesbian due to how my gender and sexuality feels?? for fuck's sake let me BREATHE testo butches have always existed. Gotta make sure my ass with the notoriously shifty identity is never too man for the sanrio obsessed white cis lesbian/sar like sorry but some of us are multigender and genderfluid etc. we're not carrying cooties for being any percent man I promise lmfao

they're all about supporting and protecting lesbians until that lesbian is too queer for them. it's just queerphobia packaged as progressivism and lesbian 'acceptance', it's like how TERFs 'just want to protect women and lesbian spaces'

lesbian community sometimes is too exclusive bruh 😭😭 i swear what is the standards of being accepted? Ill see a post or a blog that says "lesbian safe space" but next to it i see "bi lesbians dni" like were u rEally that safe of a space???

and im not even bi lesbian myself, this problem doesnt directly affect me until it does like what if they start going "ace lesbians dni" next??? its like gold star lesbianism but evolved into "you cant sit w us unless ur 100% lesbian 🙄" and thats so fucked bc ppl are way too diverse for that shit, there will always be more exceptional lesbians out there and ppl whos sexuality differs from the majority bc every brain is different and also lesbianism is a spectrum as well.

Why is it so accepted in lesbian communities that the second ones sexuality is different or a lil more exceptional ppl start putting them in different categories/boxes and claiming they arent a ""ReAL"" lesbian unless they r ""100% lesbian"" like shut uuuuppp pls youre not only excluding bi lesbians but also a bunch of other lesbians like me whos lesbianism is a little more different than the norm (for me bc of my asexuality) like thats not a safe space at all why is it sooo hard to just not police others sexuality like why is so hard literally get over urselves acting like uptight bullies .😭

now that my post about breaking down one's idea of what a woman looks like has circulated for a while (thank you all), i'm now going to make this post, as i do not want people to derail that specific conversation, nor this one.

we also must break down our idea of what a man looks, acts, sounds, behaves, and presents like.

men are not cis, het, allosexual or highly sexual beings, tall, muscular, strong, hairy, deep voiced, broad chested/shouldered, emotionless, mean, aggressive, unemotional, uncaring, distant, cold, stoic, heartless, standoffish, bread winners, bad/absent fathers, macho, obligated to work despite disabilities, or obligated to be "the man of the house."

men are people. first and foremost.

men are allowed to express just like anyone else. men do not have to be pillars of their communities. no obligation. men are allowed to be disabled, tired, weak, emotional, caring, compassionate, asexual, aromantic, friendly, warm, in need of support, neurodivergent, mentally ill, chronically ill,and have personality disorders. men have their own struggles and we have to stop telling them to "suck it up" and "move on" and "pull yourself up by your boot straps".

we are forcing men to do this: this is a cage of our own design.

once we dismantle this idea of how a man "should" be, once more: we will move past radfeminism, patriarchy, trans/androphobia, and fostering a culture where this is an acceptable way to treat men. it's not. we must allow men to be diverse. we must allow men to be who they are on the inside

"But what if a cis man starts identifying as a lesbian ??? 🥺🥺"

Then good for him for finding out a label for his complex attraction. Idk what you thought I was gonna say in response to that.

Lesboys are boys who are lesbians. Straight up that's just the definition. That includes cis men.

Thank you.

I have news about this actually: after sending this ask, I sent a message to the group discord! I don't know how effective that will be, but I have more confidence that I can assert myself on the matter better if needed. You're right though, it is exceedingly frustrating to have to do this in a queer space especially.

I got they/them'd the entire time someone referred to me at my queer group today/neg

normally I'm okay with they/them, but I literally gave out it/its ONLY. and it's like, whatever this is to be expected, it happens to it/its users all the time. But I only started giving out one set there for a reason and it's because nobody fucking uses it/its.

I'm going to muster up the courage to bring this up to them eventually but I really doubt it'll change anything, because people are so hung up on it/its on a 'person' that I could give out fuckin beep/boop as a set and they'd use it before it/its. So irritating.

i'm sorry they did that- people really see they/them as the "easy" option or even the "polite" option which it can be, but if someone explicitly tells you another set of pronouns you gotta use those. that's so frustrating. they're projecting their vision of that set of pronouns on to you and it's unfair

i hope you're able to get them to refer to you correctly. some people are so stubborn and caught up in their own feelings and thoughts on a matter. i hope people can understand this is simply about you being shown respect and being referred to correctly. take care for now, good luck out there, stay safe