Five People The Rumour Mill Thinks The Yiling Patriarch Is Sleeping With, Ranked By How Happy They Are

Five People The Rumour Mill Thinks the Yiling Patriarch Is Sleeping With, Ranked By How Happy They Are About This

5. Jiang Yanli

A rumour made all the more delicious for the layers of scandal packed in. Sect-brother-who-might-a-bastard-brother-who might-be-secret-lover, known for violent fits of rage on her behalf and unchaperoned visits with her alone. Three servants at Koi Tower have been caned for gossiping about it, which has only given the story new wings (though now no one speaks of it within earshot of Jin or Jiang allies). Poor Jiang Yanli is more aware of it than her mother-in-law or brother would like and she channels her fury into periodic spells of violent bread making.

4. Luo Qingyang

Mostly mad because the story of her ruinous association with the Yiling Patriarch is being used to defang her speech to the sect leaders. No one trusts a bewitched woman. When she shows up at her parents’ door they’ve already heard that’s she’s run away to marry a demon. She takes a second to be angry, though she’s not sure at who. Maybe Sect Leader Yao.

3. Wen Qing

Was pretty much resigned to this as soon as the reality of their living situation sunk in. He’s an abomination, she’s a witch, of course people think they’re doing unholy magic together. She tries to have a good sense of humor about it, it’s not like these sorts of insinuations haven’t been a part of her life for years, but it does irk. If she was going to turn to a demon to slake her cruel Wen lusts she’d pick someone less obnoxiously tall.

2. Wen Ning

Honestly, not super aware that the crueler half of the cultivation world thinks his Ghost Generalling extends past the Blood Pool and into the Inner Sanctum. Girls get taught a keener sense of reputation awareness! He is very busy with radishes and his family. Nevertheless, thinks it would be chill? He’s still got a baby crush and puts his trust in Wei Wuxian’s hands for a reason. Most of what he does hear is ridiculous, which helps. Overall, neutral to intrigued by the salacious whispers that crop up. Some of them seem very anatomically unlikely.

1. Lan Wangji

He wishes. Gets irrationally jealous about how few of the Wei-Wuxian-seducer-of-innocents rumours actually involve him. Objectively it’s good for his sect and his reputation but is he not being obvious enough? Are people not picking up on his clear pining? He was in pieces at the last Flower Banquet, his self control in shreds! (They do notice, it’s hard to ignore that much eye contact, but it is largely written off by the masses because Hanguang-Jun Wouldn’t Act Like That. Only a few insiders suspect the truth.) Instead everyone thinks he’s a righteous man resisting the wiles of evil, only giving in to try to bring the fallen hero back from the brink. Unacceptable. Lan Wangji demands to be a debauched victim of malicious energy too.

oh, your love is sunlight!

👾👾👾

yibo-official douyin update

The song is cool, the brother is even cooler

you spent hours in libraries and in art supply stores trying to absorb the artist tips from books your parents didn't want to buy you. on each page of every "how to draw" is a version of the same four things: this is how you shade a sphere. this is how you shade a cone.

this is what a man looks like. he is hard and angular and jutting. his chest narrows a triangle down to his sharp hip and long legs. his jawbone is a square. he is powerful, imposing, his hands are big and meaty. he is a leader.

this is what a woman looks like. she is soft and her hands tuck her long hair back behind a delicate ear. she is big-eyed and round (but not too round, she is skinny, here is the faint sketch of her abs showing), she is smaller and lighter and pretty. she has thick black lashes and her tits do not come with a massive ribcage to offset the weight we put on her - she has curves, but they are impossibly slim without giving her backache trouble. there is a large red hourglass outlined on top of her figure, the way there is a triangle outlined on top of the man. her face is a heart-shape, and her lips are pouting.

here is how you draw the woman and the man together. the man should be in action shots. the woman's ass should be in action shots. she should fit against the man to compliment his negative space - she should slot into his shadow so when they hug, they become one uniform space. here is how all the other artists have done it, see how good it looks when the man (angles, fire, passion, action) and the woman (roundness, water, emotion, supplication) complement each other? he begins the sentence, she is his ending.

do you want to kiss another girl? that is round-to-round. that is fitting the wire into the wrong socket! how would the faces look together? a single silhouette you sketch and then hide, scribbling over it.

do you want to look like a girl? by sheer genetic happenstance, you absolutely don't look like that, and you never have. you don't look like a man, either, though, do you. you don't feel like you truly belong to either gender, but there is not a "neutral/fluid" drawing in the book. there is male (triangle) or female (hourglass).

but you have a square jaw and square hands and "masculine" proportions. but you have curves and roundness and full lips and "feminine" features. someone online says, definitively, that any form of gender noncompliance is "a mental illness." this comment has over one thousand likes from people who agree.

here is how you shade a square. none of the clothes at the store look good on you, you always somehow feel like you're wearing a weird kind of costume. here is how you shade a sphere. your friend's mother calls the school because she's horrified you're in the same changing room. here is the neutral body figure: it is a wooden man. technically the wooden man is genderless, but that is because masculinity is the default, and everyone calls the figure "a wooden man." you must be small and posable and skinny and featureless, then you can be masculine enough to not have gender.

here is how to draw a person. begin with some shapes. choose the right shapes to get that person's gender correct. do not kiss her. shade in short, sharp lines.

when she laughs, look away.

Gorgeous ness

NO JOKE

Somehow this meme just keeps getting more relatable...