Hello There! Sorry I Had To Contact You Through A Reblog But I Couldn't Figure Out Any Other Way To Ask

Hello there! Sorry I had to contact you through a reblog but I couldn't figure out any other way to ask you about this! I actually found out about your give-away through my good friend Kozz (According to her you're also the one that made my Magikarp plushie, which is an absolute cutie-patutie! =3) In any case I saw this and thought I would throw my hat in the ring, if you're still accepting. Obviously you're under no pressure to do anything with it. If you do happen to be interested, though, I thought I would request a picture of two of my characters, Creature and Luka together. They're quite the dynamic duo (though not romantically connected). They communicate mostly through sarcasm and derogatory comments, but stick together nonetheless. Our mutual friend has done some lovely commissions for me of both of them. Creature: http://komical.deviantart.com/art/Cats-and-Dogs-p2-342244103 (The one that isn't Nox) http://creature-of-twilight.deviantart.com/art/Commision-New-Challenger-327491774

Luka: http://24.media.tumblr.com/e0f442f9de2a7d689bfd663142830ea8/tumblr_mpai6hZJdG1qks47bo1_r1_1280.jpg

Creature is kind of a hot-head and a wild child, always swearing and fighting and bantering (though she's quite small). She is what's called a yee naaldlooshii, the navajo word for shapeshifter. She can transform into any animal, but she must have a piece of its pelt on-hand. The usual form she takes is that of a large black direwolf. Not really elegant looking, but a big mass of hair, teeth, and drool. Luka, on the other hand, is quiet, thoughtful, and pretty sweet. He tends to come across as brooding because he's shy and a little awkward, but he's mostly a nice guy. He puts up with Creature and thinks of her like a little, annoying, but wise sister. Sorry those are kind of suck-y descriptions, but I'm running short on time before the deadline. If you'd like to know more about them feel free to ask and I'll type something real up. Or you can take a gander at a little drabble I did that features the two of them here: http://creature-of-twilight.deviantart.com/art/Living-High-Chapter-1-Strays-383518081

Anyways, thanks for reading! I hope you have fun drawings, even if you decide against doing this request. --Auggie

LIGHTENING DRAWING REQUEST

I WANT TO DRAW PEOPLE THINGS

GIVE ME A REQUEST AND I’LL DRAW IT

FREE, NO CHARGE

ONLY AVAILABLE TILL MIDNIGHT TONIGHT (Eastern Standard Time)

PLEASE NOTE I WILL DRAW YOU A MINI COMIC IF YOU ASK. JUST GIVE ME A PROMPT AND I’LL DRAW IT.

So, I'm kind of new here.

Hello there! It's a pleasure to meet whoever in the great wide world of the internet happens to be reading this. You can call me Auggie! I'm slightly (ha!) behind the times, so this is my humble new tumblr. I created it as a dumping ground for some of my ramblings and writings. Possibly reblogs too. I'm not really sure yet. In any case, I hope I'll have a little fun! I'll start out by posting some old short stories, I think.

Editing/Writing Commissions are OPEN! (Art trades, too!)

So, this is something that I've been meaning to try for a while now, but honestly I've been a little self-conscious about my own qualifications and to be frank I'm not sure there's a market for the sorts of services I could offer. However, I have some truly stupendous friends who have offered a lot of encouragement, so I decided I would at least try my hand! As hundreds of doomed movie and video game characters have said, "What's the worst that could happen?" So what I'm proposing here is opening commissions! I have several types of work I would be willing to undertake. The details can be found below. These will all be on a name your price / negotiable price basis! That's right, you tell me what you think is fair for the project your considering! Keep in mind, though, that this does not necessarily mean I will accept the price you quote me. $5 or $10 to edit a 20 page manuscript is not really a fair price. I am a college student with multiple campus jobs, so I have to put a value on my own time. However, if you are, like me, really strapped for cash, I'm sure we can work something out! We can always set up a payment plan, or substitute payments for art trades, etc! I really do want to help you out! Editing Commissions I've always had a special passion for proofreading and editing, and I would love to help some aspiring authors, self-conscious fanfiction writers, or struggling college students work on their own writing,

My editing can focus on:

Grammar, spelling, mechanics, etc.

Diction, sentence structure, flow

Overall coherence, plot line, dialogue, formatting, and much much more!

Feel free to let me know if there is one of these that you are particularly interested in, or if you need help in all of them. How comprehensive I get may depend on the price of the commission (if I get bogged down, which I doubt I will). Especially when it comes to grammar, I can work with any level of depth. In the past some people have only wanted me to fix errors (though I will always highlight where something has been changes) while others have wanted a detailed explanation of what I think should be changed and why. I can work with just about anything! For these commissions I will take on any type of work! Essays? Novel-in-the-making? Short fics? Anything! I will also take on long-term assignments, if you're looking for someone who will stick with you through the process of writing a longer piece. Credentials

I have accepted editing commissions before on other websites, and past clients have seemed happy with my services. (I even got tipped!)

I worked as an English writing tutor for a year while I was abroad in Japan, helping Japanese students with widely varying levels of fluency with school- and work- related assignments. (If you happen to be a non-native English speaker, please don't be afraid to contact me! I love working with language-learners!)

I tutor through my university.

I have often done work for family and friends on both schoolwork, work-related papers, and personal stories. I have also helped my dyslexic younger brother to hone his writing abilities.

I should be clear that I do NOT have an English degree, just a passion for writing and grammar. I HAVE taken plenty of Advanced Placement English courses in high school and college. If you have a question I can't answer, I have resources readily available to me, just in case!

Don't use the stories I have posted on this website for indication of my editing ability! I have a really terrible habit of not editing my own work or, if I do, half-assing it. Your commission will receive MUCH more time and care than my own works, rest assured!

Writing Commissions I have a feeling that these will be in lower demand, but I thought I would include them anyway! I will, however, impose a caveat that will alienate a lot of potential buyers. I will not write explicit sexual scenes except maybe for extremely persuasive amounts of money and a confidentiality agreement. I am truly sorry, but it's not something that I feel comfortable doing at this time. As one of my life goals is to teach English in a foreign country for several years, nsfw writing is not something that I need turning up during a job interview. Besides, you probably don't want to read that from me anyways. Other things I will not do include works that endorse discrimination, hatred, etc. Also please note that, if your request does not fall under the above but really give me the heebie-jeebies, I reserve the right to refuse your commission. What I will do?

Stories of any length!

Stories featuring your original characters! (If you're one of the weirdos who actually follows this blog you can even request cameos, etc. from some of my characters).

Romance! Action! Crime! Any genre, really!

Insert anything else you can think of here!

If you contact me about a fic commission please be sure to specify what it is you would like me to do and how long you would like the fic to be. Length may depend on compensation! Your fic may end up slightly longer or slightly shorter than you request, because stories have a nasty habit of not fitting well into page boundaries. You may request revisions within reason.

I may ask to display the work I have done from you on my tumblr account! If this makes you uncomfortable you can certainly refuse. However, please do not try to pass my work off as your own. If you would like to share it on your own site or tumblr please credit/link to me! Other? Something else writer-ly or creative you would like done? Just ask! I'm very flexible! I am more than happy to produce other forms of writing (poems or songs, for example). I am also happy to work as a consultant, co-writer, or idea-generator on any projects! I am also happy to create characters for your use, as long as you credit me! If you have any questions or prospective job offers please ask!

All commissions will be payed through paypal!

Trades Wanting a commission, but short on monetary funds? No problem! I happily endorse the barter system! I will happily trade my services for art, crafts, etc. I might consider fic trades, but as I don't have any ideas in mind for a fic I would want written, we may have to talk it out. Please feel free to ask, though! A great deal of the money that I make through these commissions goes back into the artistic community! When I have the extra money I love to commission artists and craftspeople! So if you'd like to cut out the middle man we can most definitely work out an arrangement. I can even provide a list of pieces I might be looking for, if anyone is interested.

Contact

You can always contact me through this tumblr account! A more convenient way of contact might be my recreational email:  siamesexneko@hotmail.com  Don't judge me, okay. I made that account in middle school. So, if anyone is still with me all the way down here, thank you for reading! You are a shining beacon of light in my dull, dull life! I hope to hear from some of you lovely folks soon!

And the Earth Shook

       Her silhouette emerged from the flat tan background that was the outside world. It might have been day or night, it was impossible to tell. All that was visible through the cave’s yawning maw was the wind dragging sand through the air.        She looked more ragged than the last time he had seen her. She was disheveled. She seemed tired. There was a poorly-healed cut over her left eye, and her arms were spotted sickly yellow with healing bruises. The cargo pants she wore were too big for her and had to be rolled up at the ankles, and her green t-shirt was several sizes too large. There was a battered black sweatshirt tied around her waist, and it too appeared to be meant for someone much larger than her. She pulled the black bandana down from over her face and squinted into cave, eyes still adjusting to the darkness.        Samuel raised his head from its bed on his paws to acknowledge her, and the movement caught her attention. “Creature,” He greeted in a deep, permeating voice. “It’s been a long time.”        “Not so very long, when you think about it.” Creature returned, venturing deeper into the sanctuary to find where he lay against the cave’s far wall. Without invitation she slumped down next to him and fixed her eyes on the tiny holes in the ceiling that allowed small pinpricks of light and grains of sand to sprinkle down onto the dusty floor.        “I suppose you’re right.” Samuel chuckled, reflecting. “When you come to be as old as I am a few years hardly matter.” He smiled, to the extent that the contortion of his canine face could be called a smile. “You look well.”        “That’s a lie,” Creature said, laughing humorlessly. “I look like shit.”        Samuel grunted his assent. “You’re right.” He agreed placidly. His large yellow eyes scoured her face as they lapsed into silence.         “What news do you bring from the outside?” He inquired finally.        Creature grunted noncommittally, her expression blank. Somehow that was more telling than any words could have been. “I see,” He muttered quietly.        Creature ignored his words and shrugged a large leather satchel off of her shoulder. “Do you mind if I eat?” She asked evasively.        “Of course not.”        Without a second thought she began rummaging through her bag, eventually retrieving a hunk of bread with mold clinging to the heel. She tested it with her teeth and, upon finding it too stale to gnaw on with any measure of success, withdrew a second item: a knife. The blade was not sleek and smooth, as it should have been; it was jagged, craggy, and hooked. A dull white in color, it did not as much as gleam in the light that filtered in. It was a decidedly inefficient tool, but with some difficulty Creature used it to saw off a slice of her bread. She did not think to offer Samuel a piece. She had never seen him eat anything.        Samuel regarded the knife incredulously as his companion tore off the first chunk of her meal. “Is that bone?”        “Horn, actually,” She replied with her mouth still full.        “I thought humanity had developed past the use of such primitive weaponry.” He mused.        Creature snorted in affirmation. “We have. I keep this for sentimental purposes. It… belonged to a friend.” She paused to regard the dagger almost sadly before quickly stowing it back in her sack. Another voracious bite obscured any emotions she may have felt.        “Sentiments can be a powerful motivator,” Samuel agreed, eying her carefully. “But your behavior tells me that it is not what led you here today. You’ve been thinking about it, haven’t you?”        Creature did not respond immediately, but he could hear her chewing stop suddenly. Her eyes glided over to the rocky protrusion jutting out from the center of the cave at an angle. A circle around it, several feet in diameter, was completely clear of dust. Irregular grooves on the ground indicated that there had once been something etched into the stone, but the characters had long faded into nothing more than faint scratch marks. It was an innocuous looking device. Were Samuel not there to explain the contraption there would be no indication of its function, or if it even had a function. But Samuel was always there, to greet each new human that happened upon the mechanism. He had been there the first time Creature had stumbled into the cave, dehydrated and exhausted, looking for a respite from the miles and miles of desert in every direction, and he had been there every time she had returned. The subterranean lair had been his abode since the beginning of time.        “How did you know?” She asked.        This elicited a throaty laugh. “I am older than you could ever possibly comprehend. I have met many humans before you and I have learned much.” He smirked. “Besides, you are not as mysterious as you would like to be.”        Silence blanketed them once more, and both contemplated the protruding lever with due solemnity. It was the most important object that either one of them would ever encounter. All it would take was one little push and it could bring humanity to a screeching halt. It was the device that would bring about the end of the world.        “Tell me what it is that weighs so heavy on you.” Samuel requested after a while.        Creature sighed and waved her hand in the air as if grasping at answers that floated around her head. “The world has changed.” She admitted. “There’s so much war….”        “There has always been war,” Samuel pointed out.        A wry, haggard smile cracked her face. “Well maybe that’s the point, isn’t it? I mean, we’ve been on this earth thousands and thousands of years and we still can’t get it right. We just keep killing each other… over stupid things!”        A deep “hmmm” rose from Samuel as he considered this, but he made no other comment. This seemed to agitate Creature a bit. She shifted her weight in the sand, drew up her knees, and clenched and unclenched her fists.        “I don’t know. It doesn’t seem like the other wars. At first it was kind of exciting, having something to fight for, but now it just seems senseless. What the hell does it even matter anymore? Half of, well, everything is gone. There’s nothing to eat; we razed all of the crops. Even if the war’s moved out of your district you have to deal with starvation. The water’s soured, too. Not many buildings left standing. But we just keep fighting. It used to seem as if for every bad act that was committed there were hundreds of good people ready to prove that this wasn’t what we stood for. But now there’s so much hate…”        Samuel replaced his muzzle on his paws, though his ears remained erect. “When we first met you weren’t exactly a shining example of anger management yourself.” He interjected.        “This is different!” Creature snapped. She pushed herself to her feet and began pacing. “There’s a difference… between anger and hate. Anger is directed at something, it’s caused by something. And you can stop anger. There’s nothing that stops hate. It’s directionless. You can focus it for a while, but once you’ve destroyed your target it just goes somewhere else. It’s deep and it’s dark and it doesn’t let go unless you make it. But nobody wants to let go of it, because without the hate, what does that say for the things we’ve done? If we stop, all of the horrible things that have happened look meaningless. And they are. But we don’t want to have to face up to that.” She quivered visibly and stopped moving in favor of staring blankly at the tiny rays of sun-or-moonlight that filtered in. “And underneath all of that hate, there’s fear. Everyone’s scared. All anyone sees all day long is death and destruction and disease and it scares the shit out of us. It doesn’t matter if you’re a fighter or a civilian; you’re scared to death all the time. It’s… it’s no way to live. But we just can’t stop….”  Suddenly resigned, she returned to Samuel’s side and slid back into a sitting position against the wall. For all the times he had seen her cocky and headstrong, angry and confident, when she looked at him she seemed helpless. “I don’t know what to do.”        The look he offered her was sympathetic. “Unfortunately, I can’t tell you what you should do. I have no voice in the decision. Pull the lever, don’t pull the lever. It’s all up to you. You’re the only one that can make the choice.”        “That just sucks.” Creature intoned, a hitch entering her voice. “Why should it be my choice? I can’t speak for all of humanity. What right do I have to decide everyone else’s fate? I’m just one person. And not even a good person. Just a person. A regular person who ended up here entirely by accident.”        Samuel’s smile was sad. “That’s exactly why it is your choice. You’re just a human; both incredibly unique and incredibly unremarkable. You have the same emotions, the same basic instincts and sensibilities of every other of your kind. This alone qualifies you. Accident or not, you found your way here and now this burden is yours and yours alone, until you die. Then someone else will stumble upon this cavern and the responsibility will become theirs.”        There was a pause. “Unless I do it.”        “Unless you do it.” Samuel confirmed.        To his surprise, she began to laugh, though the strange contractions of her diaphragm could easily have been confused for sobs. “Shit.” She muttered. “What business do I have with this sort of thing? What am I even doing?”        Samuel didn’t answer. There was no answer.        It was several minutes before Creature recovered enough to speak again. “You know, I was a soldier when this war started. I wanted the exhilaration of fighting for something you believe in. But when I look back… nothing was worth the things we did. It doesn’t matter who’s right and who’s wrong. It doesn’t even matter who wins. All that matters are the friends that died, the families that were broken, the kids who are starving. So… One day I just packed up my stuff and left. I wasn’t the first to do it; I didn’t set any kind of example. I just left. For a while I tried to help out in the towns that were still standing but… what do you do? You can’t just make everything better. You can’t even make a dent in all the pain. So then-“        “You came here.” Samuel finished for her.        “Yeah.” She grunted. “I just… I don’t know. I need you to know I’m not some sort of freakin’ saint. I’m not someone who deserves to have the lives of other people in her hands.”        Samuel nosed her hand, which had been lying limply in the sand next to him. The fur around his mouth and nose had receded as he aged, leaving flaking red scales in their wake. “You are a human Creature. If you were a saint, you would not be half so human as to speak on behalf of your kind. Saints can set examples, but they cannot know the true nature of humanity.”        This seemed to amuse Creature and she reached out a hand to scratch behind his ears. He enjoyed this, and his tail began thumping against the ground, kicking up small clouds of sand. “You’re pretty smart for a talking wolf, you know that?”        “I have explained this to you,” Samuel growled, “I am not a wolf. This is merely a form that you feel comfortable with. In my true state I have the body of a man, the wings of a vulture, and four heads: a lion, a bull, a serpent, and a human. My feet are talons. I am much too fearsome to greet wayward travelers.”        She guffawed a bit. “I know, I know. The whole ‘four heads’ thing is kind of a difficult detail to forget. I just like getting a rise out of you. You’d think after all of these years you’d have mastered sarcasm.”        At this barb Samuel barked to show his displeasure. Creature just giggled and continued to scratch his ears. This placated him and for a while the two merely sat together, staring at the raging sandstorm outside and listening to the wind shrieking. Were it not for the steady motion of Creature’s hand he might have thought she had fallen asleep. But whenever he glanced up he found her eyes wide open, though her mind was far away. He had almost started to drift off himself when she next spoke.        “What do you think it would be like? If I pulled the lever that is? I mean, is it going to be all fiery explosions and fissures opening up in the earth? You know, all screaming and blood? Because we’ve kind of got enough of that already.”        “I don’t know,” Samuel replied honestly. “I wouldn’t imagine so. If I had to guess, it would just be like turning off the lights. Turn the lever and everything just resets, goes back to the beginning.”        Creature seemed to consider this. Her brows furrowed as she sank into thought. “Wouldn’t everything just happen again, then?”        “I doubt it. The world as it is now is the result of an infinite amount of arbitrary coincidences. For the universe to reproduce itself in the exact same way a second time seems quite improbable.”        This seemed to make sense to her, and she nodded. Once again words ceased to pass between them. Samuel watched the cave’s unwavering shadows and Creature stared up at the ceiling, at the tiny streams of sand that trickled in like stardust. He did not know how long they sat there in the quiet. It must have been a while, but a handful of hours were nothing to a creature like Samuel. Creature seemed too lost in her own mind to notice the passage of time.        “Samuel,” She asked suddenly. “Is there a God? I mean, not necessarily one god from one religion, but something that kind of oversees the universe?”        Once again, Samuel replied truthfully. “I don’t know. I might have known once, but it was a long time ago. If I did, I seem to have forgotten. It is a comfort to think so, isn’t it?”        “Someone had to put you here. And the lever.” Creature pointed out.        “Perhaps,” Samuel said pensively. “Or perhaps we too are one of the universe’s many coincidences. As I said, I cannot recall far enough back to know.”        Creature chewed the inside of her lip visibly. “Well, do you think there’s an afterlife, then?”        “I could not even speculate,” He told her. “I have never died, and perhaps never will. Is that not the only way to gain such knowledge?”        “I guess you’re right,” Creature exhaled heavily. “I guess it would be nice if there was but… I think I’d be okay if this was it. Not that I’d be around to complain, I suppose. But I got some time to be the person that I am, and that’s an awful lot to begin with. Not as much as you have, maybe, but what more could you ask for?”        Samuel shrugged his shoulders.        Creature didn’t seem to require his feedback, and continued. “Even if it ended up like this… We humans have had a pretty good run of it, haven’t we? There’s been a lot of pain, a lot of sorrow. But there’ve been some good things too. Maybe not as many, but enough to make it worth it in the long run. I think that now we’ve lost track of all of the good things, all of the little things that make being alive so enjoyable… We can’t see those things anymore.”        And then she stood, with more decisiveness than Samuel had witnessed in her since she entered. “What are you doing?” He asked, voice a bit edgy.        Creature was already half-way across the cavern. She turned and smiled back at him. “We’ve had a good run,” She repeated, “But we took it too far. It’s time to give someone else a shot. Maybe they can learn to hold on to all those tiny nuances of life, the ones that justify the whole damn experience. Maybe they can do better.” Her hand was on the lever.        “I see.” Samuel said, and he lifted his head to watch.        The lever was old, maybe older than Samuel, and was somewhat resistant to movement, having been stationary for eons. But Creature pushed her shoulder against it and, after a considerable amount of grunting and groaning on the part of both parties, managed to push it, rotating the circular slab of stone on which it sat.        Nothing happened immediately, but a certain tension had been lifted from the air. “It’s done.” Creature said, and returned to the wall where Samuel was, resituating herself into her previous position. A hand reached over to resume scratching Samuel’s head. “It’s been nice knowing you, buddy.”        “It’s been a pleasure,” Samuel agreed.        And the earth shook. [Author's Note: So, this is another little short drabble I wrote a while ago. The fact that this is a drabble for me is kind of sad. That fact aside, this is a rather interesting concept that I came across while reading something called "The World's Longest Joke", which I would highly recommend. It's (really) not funny but it's worth a read anyways. The notion kind of festered in my brain for a while and eventually this story was born. On another note, I'm well aware that there are a lot of people won't agree with the decision made in this piece. To be honest, I don't. But the goal is to really think about it. Would you do it? What would the circumstances have to be? Anyways, I hope you folks enjoyed! Comments and critiques are always welcome!]

Haha oh my goddddd. Kozzzz. You have no idea how much I love this. And you. You are a magical human being (?).

Living High, Chapter 1: Strays

[Author's Note: This is my most recent work at the moment. It's a little "chapter" that I wrote to work on perspective, which is among the many things that I've been trying to improve upon (some others being pacing and communication without dialogue). After reading a lot of noir fantasy novels I really wanted to try my hand at it. This story was really inspired by the "Garrett" novels by Glenn Cook, as well as "A Madness of Angels" by Kathy Griffin. Both are amazing series and if you want to read something other than my drivel I would highly recommend them! Anyways, this was a whole heap of fun to write, so I will probably add more chapters later. Or I'll forget. Either way.]         A smoggy dusk was starting to fall over the city, though its traffic thrummed on in stubborn defiance of the changing sky. If anything, the streets livened up after sundown, especially in this district. From the dusty window of our tiny apartment I got a great view of the nightlife, as seedy as it was. I was feeling particularly unproductive that day, so I had allotted myself some time to people watch. With our few possessions packed away, all that was left was to drum up business for our little operation, and one of us was already out pounding the pavement.        I sensed her as soon as she was on our floor, long before her hand touched the doorknob. That’s one of the little quirks of being me: I can sense a virgin from a hundred yards away. It isn’t really as handy as you might think. An eye-blink later she was stomping through the front door with all the grace of an elephant-seal. She shuffled her heavy boots to kick the mud off and shrugged an old, threadbare black jacket off of her shoulders. She dumped a heap of un-dispensed advertisements on the wobbly end table standing sentry at the door, almost causing it to topple over. It held its ground against the paper assault, though, and garnered a bit more of my respect. “Any luck?” I asked as Creature settled down on the sagging couch where I was already perched.        She responded with a withering look. I had expected as much. Business had been slow. In the way that the movement of large glacial bodies can be referred to as “slow”. We had had one client a week ago, but it had been a simple open-and-shut case founded on spousal discontent. No matter where you are or what you are, some things are constant. The retainer had barely been enough to cover our living expenses. The freelance detective business is a tough racket to get into, and I certainly wasn’t married to the idea, but at the moment it was the best of a handful of bad options. I don’t really have many real-world skills. Other than bone-breaking. I’m not a violent guy by nature, but knocking heads comes pretty easily to me. That’s because, as my ever-loving friend Creature would put it, I’m “the size of a goddamn freighter”. That’s a bit of an exaggeration, but I do stand about six-foot five, and I’m solidly built. Life in the Northern Mountains won’t help you accumulate many civilized skills, but it will keep you in shape.        The painful pace of our progress should have been expected. It would take a while for our name to make the rounds. All we could do for the time being was spread the word and make our presence known. We had managed to accumulate a handful of friends in the city, most of whom I wasn’t keen on keeping for very long. I was rather fond of our landlord, Marlene. She ran a tavern on the main floor of our building, and always made sure that we were fed, even when we were short on cash. I think she’s got a soft spot for us. I couldn’t be sure, but I would peg her for a human. Humans are about as rare or as common as anything in a place like this. If she didn’t have an ounce of witch blood in her, though, I would be surprised.  She had probably been pretty once, but now her face was obscured by long slash marks, and a patch covered the hole where one of her eyes used to be. The scars didn’t bother me much. I’ve seen worse.        I was less keen on Lester. Lester was the shape shifter that had handed us our first case. There was no doubting he was a city-shifter. After generations of living in an urban environment most of them have adapted to their surroundings by taking on the forms of the typical street fare; rats, pigeons, the occasional fox, and strange and grotesque amalgamations of all of them. I had never seen Lester change, and I never hoped to, but he looked enough like a rat in his human form. He was small and made entirely out of angles with a long, sharp face. A crop of ruddy hair grew out from his head – not a color you usually see on Non-humans or half breeds. He always looked greasy. Just being in the room with him made you feel like you were part of some crooked, back-alley deal. But he was doing some scouting for us as a favor, so I had to tolerate him.        As little as I liked Lester, I liked Darko Poole less. To this day I have no idea where Creature picked this guy up. I suspected that Darko wasn’t his real name, but it was what people called him. Probably because he was a Halfer. Half-drow, half-god knows what. Whatever bizarre union had created him had left him with sickly gray skin, a curtain of long dark hair, and bright red eyes. He was tall – though not as tall as me – and had the deceptively thin body of an elf-breed. His trade was similar to ours, though he exchanged more information and fewer fists. I didn’t doubt he would slit throats without a second’s thought, though. Fighting and killing are natural instincts to the drow, and there’s not a moral between them. I’m no racist, of course, but I’ve never had many friends among the dark elves. I think Darko knew that I wasn’t his fan, and he drew a steady supply of amusement from that fact.        We had just settled in for the evening when Darko came knocking. He announced his arrival with an insistent rapping on the door. I exchanged glances with Creature and from her exasperated frown derived that I would be answering it. I stood up from the couch, almost knocking a small lamp over in the process. My hand shot out and grabbed the base to keep it from toppling over. I still wasn’t used to the lack of space in my new life, or the influx of people. Unicorns are solitary creatures by nature. At least, from my experience. I’m not exactly a poster-boy for my species. I’m as much of a colossus on four legs as I am on two; built like a massive, hairy, draft horse with a jagged crag of bone jutting out of my forehead. I was made for harsh life in the mountains. I’ve been told there are still “real” unicorns – the graceful white kind that decorate the pages of tomes and the stitches of tapestries  - around, but I’ve never met one. Rumors place many of them in the forests of Southrun where they supposedly live feral, refusing to use their considerable magical endowment to take a human form like civilized creatures. In cities and towns it’s considered common courtesy to stand upright. I guess there are purists for everything, though. Personally, I like having a “human” shape. Prefer it, even. It makes my life a hell of a lot easier.        I opened the door and planted myself firmly in its place, one hand on either side of the narrow frame, barring entry. Much to my chagrin, Darko was staring me down with those eerie red eyes of his.        “What do you want?” I demanded, my tone as business-like as I could make it.        Darko looked unperturbed by my snarl. “Hello Luka. Pleasure to see you, as always. Shouldn’t you be offering pony rides somewhere?”        I was unfazed. “What do you want?” I repeated.        “Testy, testy.” He chided. “You know you shouldn’t place yourself under so much stress. You’ll give yourself an ulcer.”        “Darko!”        “Fine, fine. You should be a more gracious host. I brought you a case.” Only then did he move, too soon for me to shoot him with an incredulous look. He folded himself over and slid under one of my arms in an instant. It wasn’t until he was behind me that I noticed he had not come alone.        His companion was undeniably fair, even with her eyes puffy and ringed with red. Seeing my hulking figure obscuring the doorway had lit the fires of uncertainty in her eyes. I tried for a sheepish smile and unhinged myself from the frame, extending an arm to beckon her inside. She hesitated but, seeing that Darko had made himself at home, strode elegantly and purposefully inward. I almost knocked over our stack of flyers following her.        When I returned to the sitting area I found that Darko had taken Creature’s previous position on the couch, draping himself over languidly across it. Creature had dislodged herself from the sofa and was now at the window, bracing herself against the sill. Her gaze flitted from Darko, to me, and landed on the unknown woman.        “You boys want to fill me in?”        “Don’t look at me!” I carped with a shrug.        Instead, we both looked at Darko, who sat up a bit straighter. “Right to business then? Very well. I would like you both to meet Delphina.”        All of our attentions turned to the woman standing in the middle of the room.  Now that I was given the opportunity to reflect on her appearance I found her to be even more alluring than I had initially suspected. Her hair was the palest of blonds, plaited into a simply but fashionable braid down her back. Her skin was similarly colorless, but it was perfectly smooth and seemed lit from within. She was long and thin and projected a regal, dignified air, even in her uncertainty. When I looked into her eyes, clouded and unreadable, I was struck by their violet hue.        “Pleased to meet you,” She remarked, voice almost distant. Something about her affect told me that she wasn’t.        “Delphina is a half-elf breed,” Darko elaborated, apparently seeing how antsy and furtive I had become in her presence. I don’t exactly have a way with women. “And she has a business proposition for you. Delphina, these are the investigators I told you about. The big one is Luka and the mean one is Creature.”        The elf blood explained a lot. The elvish are renowned for the ethereal quality of their beauty. These days the larger hubs of society are full of all sorts of creatures, including bastard offspring from pairings that would have been considered monstrous only generations ago. Halfers still aren’t the norm and can be treated with some suspicion based on their parentage, but society has slowly become more tolerant. I doubted that this woman was someone who had to deal with “due suspicion”, though. She could unlock bank vaults with that face.        If there was one person who wasn’t charmed, it was Creature. I had suspected as much. Creature didn’t get along with many people at first blush. That went double for other women. Triple if they had some sort of natural beauty. Had I not known better I would have suspected it was the product of jealousy, but the only thing I’ve ever seen Creature try to woo is a slab of steak. No, she just doesn’t trust beautiful people. She says that nature wrapped them up in those good looks to compensate for all of their craziness.        Sometimes I think she’s right.        If she has another flaw (She does. Many, in fact.) it’s her impatience. “Well?” She demanded of Delphina, more callously than I would have liked.        To her credit, the elvish girl was not intimidated by my tiny, scrappy scoundrel. She composed herself, folding her hands demurely in front of her, and began. “You see,” she said, “I would like to hire you two to look into the matter of my fiancé’s death. He was murdered four nights ago in our home when I was-“        “Wait, wait.” I stopped her before she really delved into her story. “Your fiancé was murdered? I mean, I don’t want to sound unhelpful, but doesn’t that sound like a problem for the local Peace Keepers?” The Peace Keepers are the elite, highly-trained groups of soldiers tasked with policing the streets of our towns and cities. And by elite and highly-trained I of course mean incompetent and completely unreliable. If you enlist in the military and are generally ass-faced or terrible at your job, you get relegated to the Peace Keepers. As such they don’t usually take a lot of pride in their work. Some of them seem to enjoy bullying civilians, and the rest are in the pocket of whoever has the most cash on hand.        That being said, they’re still the ones in charge of upholding the law.        Delphina grimaced at the suggestion. I couldn’t say I really blame her. “The Peace Keepers can’t help me. They sniffed around the crime scene and did exactly the amount of work they were required to do, no more. Even if I could convince them to investigate, I wouldn’t be able to trust them. My husband-to-be, Thomas Shueler, was a wealthy man, and I’m sure there are people in the business world that would not be sorry that he’s dead. No matter how rich you are, there are always deeper pockets in the world.”        I could understand where she was coming from. Even if she paid off the Peace Keepers to put real effort into her case, she would constantly have to worry about being outbid by people more powerful than she was. At best that would distract from her cause, and at worst would run directly counter to it. Creature and I were probably cheaper in the long run. Hiring thugs like Darko and us would probably be cheaper in the long run.        “So, you think that your fiancé’s murder was related to his business dealings?” I asked, just to clarify.        “Well,” She faltered. “I don’t really know what to think, actually. I’m sure foul play was involved in his death, but it isn’t exactly a cut and dry killing. He…”        She broke off, unable to continue, so Darko took it upon himself to pick up where she had left off.  “The way he died… it almost looked like an animal attack. Gruesome, from the way it’s been described. No sign of clean cuts or fist fighting. Torn apart, more like it. Throat ripped out. Tooth and claw job. But it couldn’t have been just some animal that stumbled out of the woods. Anything that big and that mean… someone would have seen or heard it. And the whole mess went down on the third floor of a gated property, the front door locked. There’s no way some dumb beast just wandered in and decided to have itself a midnight snack.”        I could see that the conversation was making our guest uncomfortable, so I cut Darko short to address her. “So, where were you when all of this was happening?” She had begun to tell me earlier, but I had interrupted.        “I was at my mother’s house,” She said quietly. She was trembling now and had lost some of her earlier resolve. “We were making plans for the wedding….” She stopped herself again.        “Oh gods,” Creature sounded agitated. “Calm down lady. Just… don’t cry, okay?” Creature has never known what to do when someone cries. I think it freaks her out. She just gets fidgety and loud and ends up making things worse.        Luckily, Delphina seemed to remember herself and the quivering stopped. She was once again the dutiful lover rather than the frightened, sorrowful girl. “As I said, my husband was very well-off, and I am his only beneficiary, aside from money that was endowed to keep his business alive. I am willing to offer you one-tenth of his estate, worth two-hundred-thousand in gold total, if you are successful in locating the killer. I will gladly pay you a retainer of one thousand in gold for your time, and cover your expenses while you are under my employ.”        I must have looked surprised. I can’t imagine a variation of that conversation where I didn’t. Twenty thousand gold is a hefty sum, more than I had ever had at one time at that point. I exchanged glances with Creature, whose amber eyes lit up like street lamps. The case was a bit more than we had ever taken on, but for that much money it sounded worth a shot…        Reining my imagination in, I remembered our second visitor and affixed him with a trustless stare. “And what’s your cut in all of this?” I asked dubiously. I doubted Darko would present us anything without a finder’s fee.  A full blown murder investigation was probably more leg work than he preferred, but twenty thousand is enough to get even the laziest mercs off of their asses.        Darko was inspecting his fingernails with feigned interest. “Me? I don’t require much. Since there are two of you and one of me, and you two will be doing the heavy lifting, I can settle for thirty percent.”        I looked at him like he had just snorted a line of iron dust off a pixie. “Thirty percent?!” I demanded, “For what? All you did was drop her on our doorstep! That’s barely worth ten.”        “I could have gotten a hundred percent if I didn’t have a special place in my heart for you two,” Darko pointed out dryly, the notion of losing out on his imagined cut putting a chill in his voice. “The thirty percent’s not just for delivering her. That will cover my consulting fee, too.” Before I could balk he elaborated, “You two still don’t know this city from your own asses, and you don’t know how to work it like I do. Thirty percent and I’ll do all the digging you need, give you all the hints you want. If you’re nice to me, I may even be able to round up some reinforcements if things get dicey. Or you can hand me fifteen percent and I’ll be on my way. I warn you though; most people in this business aren’t near as sweet as me, or as pretty.”        As much as I loathed conceding to his point, Darko was right. Not about the merits of his own appearance, of course, but about the prospects of finding another consultant should we need one down the road. And with something that sounded as sticky as this, I had a feeling we would. Who knew what they would try to charge if they found out about the pay-out. In the long run, it was probably cheaper hiring Darko right out of the gate. Dammit.        I exchanged glances with Creature, who shrugged noncommittally and seemed to have no desire to be included in the financial bargaining. I gave an unhappy grunt, but nodded. “Fine. Thirty percent it is. But you’d better make it worth our while.”        “I never have problems delivering, Luka.” He informed me whimsically.        “Before we go any further,” Delphina interjected, breaking a bit of the tension, “I want this to be perfectly clear: If you find any leads, any evidence, anything, you report it directly to me. I want to know everything that you find.”        I had considered this a given. “Understood,” I replied. “Should we… sign a contract?”        “Already have one handy,” Darko jumped nimbly up, withdrawing a piece of paper from within his jacket and handing it to me. I unraveled the parchment and gave it a once-over. Nothing in there that hadn’t been discussed earlier. I noticed Darko had taken the liberty of adding in his thirty percent before he had even stepped through the door. Cocky bastard.        I fumbled about for a pen and scrawled my name in the designated areas before passing it off to Creature, who did the same. I picked up the contract and returned it to Delphina, who rolled it neatly and tucked it under her arm. “Very well then.”        “So the hunt begins!” Darko chimed in.         “The hunt for what?” Creature contemplated almost darkly.        I sighed. “That does seem to be the question. Could be any number of things. Can’t be a human, that much is certain, and probably not a wild animal, either. Torn not cut could mean some sort of shape shifter, maybe one of the meaner breeds of troll or ogre. Any notable organs or appendages missing?”        Darko shook his head. “Nothing taken or obviously removed, from the reports, though it sounds like the whole thing was a mess. Just the throat. That was probably the killing blow.”        “No throat could be a vampire, then.” I added reluctantly, racking my brain.        Suddenly Darko was smirking. There was nothing to like about that expression. “Wealthy business man, possible vampire attack? I think I know who we need to talk to.” He didn’t give us the chance to ask who. “You two ever heard of Lux Moridonte?” Neither of us had. “Surprising,” Darko mused, “Lux might as well be the overlord of our fair city. He has his hands in anything black market or underground. Got a third of the town on his pay roll, or might as well have. He’s not just a thug, he’s the king. If he wasn’t in business with Shueler, he at least knew about him. He owns a bunch of places around these parts, dens of inequity all of them, but he keeps shop at a cozy little club a dozen blocks from here.”        I pursed my lips. The idea of calling on this Lux wasn’t sounding particularly appealing. It was bad enough he was a vampire, but a vampire who owned the city? I’m not prejudice against the Night People, but I’m smart enough to know that a vampire is bad news. There aren’t many of them left nowadays, since most of their kind were wiped out in the last crusades a century ago, and the ones that have made it this far are tougher than nails. Damn near impossible to kill, too. If you run afoul of one you have to rip it into pieces too small to come after you. Or stake it through the heart. But you really don’t want to get close enough to do either of those things. A lead was a lead, though, and I couldn’t very well shy away with our client standing in our living room.        “Can you take us there?”        Darko smiled again, “I can. But we might want to wait a few hours. Down there, the party is probably just getting started.”