1st July

1st July💚

Hello there 🩵

💌 Send this to the twelve nicest people you know or who seem to have a good heart and if you get five back you must be pretty awesome. 💌

Come here let me pet you, oh my people like you really make me feel worth and happy….Thanks again for being my closest friend here🫂💫

Please! Listen to me

Pairing: college student! Jaehyun x college student! Reader (mention of NCT Jaemin x reader)

Genre: Angst, Romance, fluff, slice of life, university au, non-idol au, a very emotional au (read with caution) W.C : 3.5k

Warnings: Isolation, depression, past traumas, death of loved ones(major character which will really make you sad and am sorry) and Jaehyun’s dimples with his cutest smile(major warning)

Summary: “Will you listen to me?”, looking upward with a soft look on the face , eyes searching for the answers deep inside the opposite brown orbs which are staring directly to her. “You really thought I was joking back then? I meant every words honestly and trust me, you are the MOON amid my ocean of star”, confessing the heart out with a adorable smile revealing tiny dimples which causing the eyes to twitch tightly.

I recommend you to listen to ( That's okay by D.O.)

Taglist: @mymoodwriting @justhere4kpop @vvshere

Well this story was supposed to be something else but now it ended up a bit different from the original plot because I didn't feel okay with writing that plot.

I hope you kindly show some love with reblogs and likes and feedbacks are always appreciated.

*under the cut*

The streets are lonely just like the heart of yours. The street lights are not illuminating the place much as needed similarly just the way you always put up a smile on your face which is not enough to decrease the ache in your heart. ‘The people around me are so happy even if they had a rough day at least they could go back home in a relief to get back to someone’s warmth.’ They enjoy the warmth and can rely on it to ease themselves. Well unlike you who has to face a cold world when you return back to your place after a long day which you can’t even call it a ‘home’ anymore. The place which once seems a warm paradise to you is now like a cold abandoned Hell.

No one is going to listen to you anymore.

Once for you coming back home was the best thing ever you desired. Coming back to see the smile which erase your every tiredness from your body. The warm hug which made your home a paradise and then “How was your day my love?”. This was enough for you to calm down from a stressful day and forgetting all the problems in your life and just focusing on HIM.

Today is different from those days. It’s now similar to the days you are spending for last 6 months. LAST 6 MONTHS AFTER HE LEFT YOU. Now you longer want to go back home early. No longer the surroundings feel fresh and enchanting to you which once you both cherish a lot. The surroundings are to your likings full of flowering plants and open fields with some old trees which give a place a soothing and calmness. But now you feel suffocated passing through it because its no longer the same to you without him by your side. The park came into the view and a sad smile appeared on your lips oblivious to your sense. “I MISS YOU” this park is the place where you both first met and shared so many memories which you didn’t thought back then to be the sad ones later. Tears welled up in eyes but you didn’t bother to wipe them away. At least the tears were warm unlike other feelings in your life.

Standing in front of the apartment still you don’t feel like to enter into. ‘If I go back today, Will he be waiting there for me just like those days?’ But deep down you know no matter how long you wait, he wont ever come back to even if he wants to.

Unlocking the door, you are welcomed by the cold darkness of the living room. You didn’t even bother to switch on the light rather turned towards your right and entered the bedroom and switched on the bed light. You placed your bag on the study table and chose to fresh yourself to brush off your mind. It took almost 20 minutes to complete yourself drying off after the shower and plopped on the bed. You don’t know why suddenly all your past thoughts are flooding your mind today.

It was supposed to be a usual day like other but the batchmates ruined your day by telling

“You, ugly bitch is not the one to be loved you know.”

‘Yes, I know and that’s why parents left me when I was too young as well as he.’

This is the reason you felt so low with your emotions. Six months back when you finally realized that he won’t be back in your life ever, you never felt the warmth in yourself. You tried to move on, to forget about your past life but somehow you still miss him.

‘Wish you could have died in that accident too with him.’

People around made you such an emotional mess with their consolations which sometimes seemed fake to you. You tried to move to a different place and to start a life from a fresh beginning but his smile reminds you that this apartment is the only last place you can feel him. You isolated yourself from the outside world even skipped meals but you know all these could never give you anything else other depression. So without getting involve in any conversations you put up a smile every time you went out and try to keep yourself busy in your part time jobs so that you have to come back home late and keep your mind off of HIM.

Unfortunately for you, his brother JUNG JAEHYUN is in same university and some of the classes with you in your university and that’s why classmates pick on you even more.

“You, bitch look at him. How you have killed his brother and left him all alone.”

‘Really, I guess I should have died in his place at least he would not have to lose his brother.’

JUNG JAEHYUN and NA JAEMIN, they are not brothers by blood but step-brothers. They are of three years apart in age but the bonding between the brothers were beyond anyone can imagine. No one can even have a doubt that they are not real brothers. Jaehyun’s parents adopted Jaemin when the younger one’s only parent, his mom died due to a chronic illness. Since, then they are brothers and were being called JAE BROTHERS.

Starting of the university, you fell in love with Jaehyun because of his heart laugh and dimple smile with a kind gentleman personality. You didn’t tell him about your feelings scared to get rejected and then bullied by those mean classmates. You and Jaemin were in the same year and were best friends. He had a sneaky personality but a gentle one like his elder brother. Jaehyun was one year senior than you both and you all often meet in the cafeteria or in the common classes. One day Jaemin asked you about your feelings for his brother.

“Y/N, tell me honestly.”

“What?”

“Do you like Jaehyun?”

You didn’t know what to reply like if it is right to say that to him. What will happen if he tells this to his brother and then the next everybody in the college will somehow know about it.

“I don’t know….”

“Look don’t try to hide it from me at least when we are like…..best friends.”

“See I don’t-”

“You are afraid to get rejected and then bullied because of the rumours that will be spread.Right?”

“Hmm…” You no longer denied your true self in front of him when he knows you more than yourself.

“I knew it!!!” He smiled at you and added “Well I have a silly idea that we can work out and please don’t deny because to know your feelings for him, you have to do this. I know my brother very well and how much he likes you so its better I try this plan to better solve the problem between you two.”

It was a shocking news to know from him how his brother loved you every moment you three met at your usual spots but neither of you ever let the other to know about your feelings.

“I don’t trust your ideas but I give it a chance. So what’s the idea?”

Jaemin again gave you his heart smile and in return you smiled at him.

“Jaemin please come back……I can’t handle this without you….Please…..I am lost…..I don’t know what to do anymore….Should I give up?...” You glanced to the bed side table and took the phot frame in your hands and the tears rolled down your eyes. You sat up and looked at the picture. The two brothers enjoying their day for their weekends. It was the last picture he had clicked before that day. Jaehyun clicked him that picture so that he could send you.

Who thought it would be the last time. The last time to be the part of the game you both started to make Jaehyun realise his feelings which you both didn’t realise to have turned into a reality. Yes, starting the game, you both were enjoying it as best friends but eventually you both started dating officially when one day you both get to know that Jaehyun has to take over the business so parents won’t allow him to date now so that he won’t get distracted. You were heartbroken on hearing that but Jaemin was there for you.

He was always there for you. He is still there for you but just you can’t see him, touch him, feel him and say your every problem to him. There is now no one to listen to you.

The daylight is so strong for your view that you have to twitch your eyes often. You have noon classes today and you are making your way towards the building. ‘My day is no longer special without you.’ Last night you cried a lot and you don’t remember when you fell asleep but found the frame you were still holding in your grasp when you woke up. ‘I will try to be happy for you, you always wanted the best for me. And I will prove you that how a strong girl you have made me.’ Crying the whole night you realize its better to keep his soul and pay off his hard works he did for you back then. You smiled today, a genuine smile.

“Y/n?” you were lost in your thoughts and didn’t realise that someone has approached you and calling you. But the second call broke your thought.

“Jae…Jaehyun? Oh hello…I will be going to my class…Bye” you avoided his eyes and turned on your heels when he suddenly grab your upper arm and faced you towards him.

“Why?” this is the first time you both are having a conversation in six months after the incident. You ignored his gaze as much as you could because without Jaemin you didn’t have the confidence to face him and after his death, you think he will blame you for all the cause. Somehow you have felt his longing gaze always following you in class and he was upset whenever the classmates bullied you. Whenever he tried to speak, you thought he will cause more scene so you ran away.

“Why what? Leave my hand Jaehyun. I am not in a mood today to be bullied again. I came early so that I could sit in the front so that I don’t have to sit around those girls so please leave.”

He held you even tighter when you tried to wiggle out of his grasp.

“Why are you ignoring me?”

“I am not ignoring YOU but the scene you will create for blaming me for your brother’s death.”

“I don-”

“I know you will blame me for everything. It was really a stupid idea to start the game who knew the consequences would be like this.”

“Why will I blame you?”

“Because like everyone else you also think, I am not a person to be loved and I should have died that day instead of him.” You are crying mess now because standing in front of your first crush and speaking about a cursed day…..without Jaemin by your side.

“So, you really think I will blame you. Even if I should, I can’t blame you, I can’t leave you now. You are suffering like this for past six months and you think I will leave you knowing how broken you are.”

“I am okay. I know how to take care of myself…Everything is okay.”

Jaehyun tried to speak when you both heard approaching footsteps down the stairs towards the hallway so he pulled you to a nearby empty classroom which only used for some major student project works. When you both entered, he hugged you tightly seeing how badly you were crying and not even trying to control the tears.

“That’s okay. Let it out to me. Just don’t say to leave.”

“Why?” now its your time asking him the reason for being so affectionate to you because he should blame you for his death as if you both didn’t went to have the date then everything could have been fine.

“Please Y/n let me...let me hold you…I- I don’t want to lose you again…please” he is still hugging you and could feel him snuggling in the crook of your neck. You slowly picked up your right hand and patted on his back while the other hand was still crumbled on his shirt. You have stopped crying now and waiting for him to explain what does he meant now by not losing you again.

This is the first you and jaehyun are so close with each other and you could feel the heat his body was radiating.

“Jae, what do you mean? Why are you suddenly like this? I-” You broke the hug and went to nearby bench to sit on it. Shaking your head you spoke again,

 “I don’t understand why are you suddenly listening to me? Why are you even speaking to me? Are you feeling pity for me? Please let me remind you I don’t need any of this. We should go in our separate path.”

“I should have listened to you before Y/n… I should have listened to him before.”

“Jae….”

“Hmm… I think I am the real stupid one here. I didn’t understand what was he trying to say to me and what was he trying to do but still chose to believe my other self that I should become an intruder in his happiness.”

Jaehyun looked at you with a sad smile but now holding an eye contact with you. You never imagined to spend such a time with him all alone without him. He is really looking so down and broken unlike the other times when you three used to meet and he would be the one to be the brightest among you three and whenever he used to laugh on his brother’s joke, your heart skips a beat. Today it’s different it’s no longer that happy meet but a sad and confused one. You thought all these months that you are the one affected by his death but what about Jaehyun. He lost the most precious part of his life, they both were not close enough with their parents and usually always stick by each other. How is he feeling all these months? How is he keeping him off of this empty space in his heart?

“That day…That day when you both returned from the club and I called Jaemin for an important purpose. I got to know about the truth between you both. Jaemin was too drunk to listen about the business stuff and suddenly he rambled on the things between you both.”

Now your full attention is on the boy standing in front of you. You never knew all these months that Jaehyun knew about your feelings for him but he knew, he knew but still he kept it hidden but why.

“ He told each and everything since the first day you both started the game and how he tried to make me jealous. But the last thing he told me really was not expected.”

“What did he say?” You are hoping to hear how he had begged his brother to understand him with false accusation or made another horrible plan one with his brother.

 “He loved you but you still love me. It really used to hurt him to see the one he loves to always have feelings for someone else. He didn’t realise when playing the game when he got attracted to you. That’s why I fake a problem of my parents and business deal. I wanted him to get the happiness he deserves.”

“Why did you joke about protecting me every time I will be in need. You will never let my world to be shattered in pieces like this. You were drunk that day. It was another reason I was ignoring you all these months you know.” Tears again rolled down your eyes but now you didn’t make any sound.

“I want to listen to you Y/n. The same way Jaemin used to listen to you. I have already so many regrets within me and now losing you will add up to it” he took your hands in his and make you stand up. He gave a gentle squeeze and said “Please, Listen to me and trust me I craved to listen to your voice and you to share your problems so that you don’t have to face this harsh reality all alone.”

“Will you listen to me?”, looking upward with a soft look on the face, eyes searching for the answers deep inside the opposite brown orbs which are staring directly to her. “You really thought I was joking back then? I meant every word honestly and trust me, you are the MOON amid my ocean of stars”, confessing the heart out with an adorable smile revealing tiny dimples which causing the eyes to twitch tightly.

This smile gave you the warmth you were missing all these days, all these months. All these years you thought Jaehyun to ignore you only for his brother’s happiness. Jaehyun’s eyes are shining the same way you saw stars in Jaemin’s eyes. No matter how much Jaehyun loves you but his every move is reminding you of Jaemin. You can see yourself the brightest star in their life.

‘You were Jaemin’s sunlight who left you in the dark and now you are Jaehyun’s moonlight who will show you the light to your life again.’

“Please let me continue your life where he left it. I don’t want you to start from the beginning but to hold onto the string where he left. He was a wonderful chapter of yours and I don’t want you to forget about it. The rest will be you and mine’s chapter. Please let me hold your hand forever.”

“I don’t know Jae. I don’t know what to do anymore. What to feel anymore. Everything is shattered within me. I am barely holding within myself.”

“That’s why I want to be the support. I want to be the one you can trust upon and I want to listen to you just like the way he did. I want to be the warm place in your life. The warmth you lost the day he left us.”

“Jae……I trust you…” Just this is the only thing he wanted to listen from you. He suddenly crashed his lips on you. Your hands were in his one hand and the other one holding your neck gently. Your free fingers take hold of his shirt and squeezed it. The kiss was sudden but not rough, it was gentle and passionate and for a second you thought about kissing jaemin when he suddenly broke the kiss.

“I’m sorry….I’m really sorry…” he closed his eyes but you both were still in the same position. His forehead was resting on yours.

“That’s okay Jae. Let’s give it a chance. He did so much for us at least we could be together.  All these years of my university were special because of him. He is a precise and wonderful piece of my life. But Jae, you can be the one whom I can share my memories with him. He would be happy to know that his plan worked.”

Jae hugged you again, “I’m really happy that my brother got someone like you. He deserved to be loved by someone like you. I hope you both get each other forever in your next life.”

“Let’s first continue this book. You have started my book, he had made me realize the things and to feel them in a different way and then he left. Suddenly you came into it again and promised to continue till the end.”

Both of your classes are long forgotten. You can catch up with your topics some other time but you can’t give another chance to reduce the weight of your heart like this like here and with him.

“No. He has never left us, he is always with us that’s why we are here together standing like this. We were always three and will be three until the end. His smile and his soul is always between us keeping us warm.”

“Thank You Jae.”

“I love you Y/n. I know you can’t forget him but at least we can take small steps.”

You hugged him tight and loose a bit to look into his eyes. He smiled at you and gave you a peck on lips.

“I love you.”

‘I’m sorry Jaemin but I want to continue rest of the book but remember you are still a part of it.’

You and Jaehyun finally smiled a genuine smile today in all these months. Maybe somewhere Jaemin is also smiling for you two are together now.

Your world is again warm and also you three are together.

So it’s 13th of JUNE and it’s my birthday 🥳

I’m really happy that I have these above 4 ult groups who got me some amazing online friends here on this platform and I love you all🫂🩶💙🧡🖤

Thanks to EXO for dropping a masterpiece (LET ME IN) just few hours before my birthday, I'm not crying again oh gosh!

Happy Birthday to all my czennies aka the NCTzens of the NEOcity💚

The Pearl Neo Champagne Day to my most unserious fandom🫂💚

don't mind me, just sliding in your ask box~~~

💌 Send this to the twelve nicest people you know or who seem to have a good heart and if you get five back you must be pretty awesome. 💌

Your sliding cost me a heart attack uk….I love u more than Ateez do *blocking Ateez from seeing my text*… come here let me give you a hug 🤗 now who will comfort me when u made me emo🥲🫂