I Know Steve Is Really Talented With His Shield And Is Like An Expert With It

I know Steve is really talented with his shield and is like an expert with it 

but just imagine him smacking it in his face 

or tripping over it

or waking up in the middle of the night and he shuffles off to the bathroom only to step on the edge of the shield and it smacks him in the shin and he curses loudly enough to wake up the other Howling Commandos who just sit up and start laughing at the way Steve is holding onto his leg and swearing 

Steve Rogers uses voice to text to send texts and formats them like a telegram

Just as the phrase “what the entire fuck” implies the existence of fractional fucks, the phrase “what the absolute fuck” implies the existence of both positive and negative fucks (or else there would be no need for an absolute value operation). Taken together with the phrase “what the actual fuck” (which implies the existence of imaginary fucks), we may thus conclude that fuckery is isomorphic with the complex field.

Bucky Barnes sees a fucking raccoon firing a machine gun while cackling like a maniac and instead of losing his shit he just shrugs, picks it up and spins it around Mary Poppins style