Something I Find Really Funny About The Spamton Plush Is How His Jacket Leaves Dark Stains All Over His

something i find really funny about the Spamton plush is how his jacket leaves dark stains all over his tiny little body and makes him look really grimy and dirty as a result, like as if you pulled him out of a dumpster. you can easily just give him a few spot cleans and wash the jacket every now and then but it's so funny how it just makes him really dirty. Spamton is forever a pathetic little guy in a trash can, even in plush form

quick post clarifying what i'm gonna do with my Crarry art and my Craig design moving forward

i just wanna make this post as short and sweet as i can as i've been struggling to find a way to write this in a coherent fashion (i'm VERY tired today, lol), especially with everything that's been going down in the fandom lately. people are not happy right now. this is a post meant to explain what i'm going to be doing with my Crarry stuff from now on, as well as how i'm gonna be using my fan design for Craig.

on the topic of my Craig x Barry art: i've been a little bit conflicted on what to do with it for a little bit, but i've mostly decided towards keeping it up on my blog for archival purposes. i don't like having to remove my art, especially when 1. it was made with the context that the (at the time) canon truth was that Barry and Craig were nothing but unrelated friends, and 2. it's still good art and it brought me a lot of joy when i first created it. i've regretted deleting art in the past and i think that i'd definitely regret deleting it now, especially if there was a threat of it becoming lost media and i didn't have the files to back it up. i care too much about my art to do that. so, it's all staying up on my blog, with the added disclaimer that it was made before August 17th 2024 and that it was obviously not supposed to portray weird incest stuff. can't do much about putting a disclaimer on it if it's already been reblogged though, so it's only gonna appear on the original post :/

on the topic of Craig himself: this is the bit i'm most excited about, but it's also the hardest bit to explain in a way that makes sense, so i'll try not to get ahead of myself here.

so, to start off with: in this post, i made some doodles showing an improved fan design i had made for Craig that portrays him as a blond nerdy guy with glasses and an injured eye. this is obviously not how Craig ended up looking like in canon and wasn't what i expected him to look like, it was something i made for myself and my own art. even so, he was practically just a skin applied to a pre-existing character whose personality had already been established. but now that the Craig i intended that design to be attached to has been revealed to be something we thought he wasn't (barry's entire freaking dad), i'm gonna do something a little different with my Craig to differentiate him from canon. i'm gonna take everything i liked about him before the reveal, retool him and his personality to better match the ideas and headcanons i had brewing in my head for him, and create a whole new canon for him to reside in. i've basically made him into a slightly divergent alternate version of canon Craig, basically. and it is incredibly self-indulgent, lol. (isn't that what being a creative is all about though..... self indulgence and insane storycrafting)

this bit might be slightly controversial, but what i'm planning with this version of Craig is that i'm gonna continue shipping Barry with him instead of Canon Craig like before. i really like the dynamic that Barry and Craig had in canon before the Dad Reveal Jumpscare Incident, with them sort of being polar opposites who would have some silly banter with each other, but also having a few similarities and shared interests that would bring them together, so that dynamic is gonna be brought over to this canon i've created for myself. it's basically gonna be a smorgasbord of everything i like about these characters with some expansions and slight changes to better fit with what i think would have been cool to see actually happen in canon. i'm likely gonna make a post about how i want to characterise my Craig later, but just know that 1. CranBarry is a thing in my little universe and 2. my Craig =/= Canon Craig and there will be a disclaimer explaining that on each fanwork i make depicting the ship from now on. i should probably give my Craig a last name so i don't have to keep calling him "my Craig" for disambiguation......

this hasn't been done out of spite or disrespect towards HB or anything at all. i'm disappointed with the change they made, and i do think it was very poorly executed, but at the end of the day, what happens in canon is not my story to write no matter how much i want to see in the series, and all i can do is sigh, shrug, pick up a pencil and start enacting the change i want to see for myself. i'm someone who believes that, while art can absolutely be criticised, it's up to the artist to decide what they want to do, and they don't have to cater to feedback if they don't want to. granted, it is a little different in Halfbrick's case because Jetpack Joyride is their product, and they are a sizable company who also makes money and business decisions and has a big audience and whatnot, but you get it right? it sucks, but like.... there's not really much you can do about it apart from write something you'd want to see.

so yeah, that's pretty much everything. i'm hoping this will go over well with everything that's happened because i really do love the gay little relationship i've given these two, i just can't continue doing it with the canon version of Craig for obvious reasons. the only problem i really see this causing is the very slight irritation that will come with possibly having to clarify this every time i post a Crarry thing. it'll probably be no biggie though, i'll just link to this post explaining everything. i sure do love coming up with incredibly convoluted solutions to simple problems looolll, it's my special talent at this point XD ahh well. if there's a bright side, it means i get to be even more self-indulgent and creative with these doofuses, and there might be some new headcanon and fanfic stuff coming later, as well as new Craig art. sucks that canon decided to fold in on itself, but i'm gonna try to ignore it for the most part.

The true canon reveal:)

I'm gonna try to draw p runny in the style of the new series because he looks like he'd be so cute 😭✋

Idc - Craig is p runny and ain't no dumb corp making stupid decisions gonna change that

Why the hell wouldn't it be? My theory literally tied everything together how he could be. So stupid. I wanna see what would have happened with the old shorts that were supposed to come out :// plus if they did this theyd have more people interested on who he is and go play aoz but apparently they don't want the revenue.

Smh my head

did tumblr just secretly change the font or something???? man i hate when websites just change stuff unexpectedly now everything looks wrong. tumblr this is the neurodivergent website you cannot do this to us what have you don e

saw this new image uploaded to the JJ wiki in the JJ2 Demo article and oh my god i love this character select screen i'm going to hug all of them

it's always great to see my two favourite boys get some new art of them, and Betty looks SO COOL with her angel wings!! look at her go!!!

AOZ Total Apocalypse Barry Redesign

so last year, i posted a couple of sketches of this design i had for Barry Steakfries in a scenario/AU where AOZ was a complete survivalist apocalypse. i really like the design i came up with, but my art style has matured and changed a lot since that original post, and i thought i'd give TA!Barry a revamp with an updated style and more details than i initially gave him :D

here is his new and improved design!!! + an image for comparison

(sorry for the image being comically big lol)

his design was originally based on Barry's Monster Hunter skin from Magic Brick Wars where he's seen with a scratch over his right eye and i thought that was a really cool skin for him, so i made a whole alternate universe design from that. thing is though...... the eyepatch in the original design i made was on the wrong eye. so like. i had to fix that lol. i also felt that the design didn't look visually distinct enough? like it's different from the OG inspiration but i felt like it needed more, so i gave him some boots, a belt, shifted around his injuries and gave him a different hairstyle. i really like the hairstyle i gave him, it looks messy and disheveled and yet is still reminiscent of who Barry was before the apocalypse and i also came up with it in like 10 seconds :3 also, i felt like his tie kind of cluttered the design a bit and didn't feel necessary, so it's now wrapped around his left leg as a makeshift brace.

Total Apocalypse is something i've actually thought out a story outline for, so the next few paragraphs are just gonna be me spoiling explaining the lore and why Barry looks the way he does, along with some other stuff :D (this ended up being WAY longer than i intended it to be lmaoooo)

the general story of Total Apocalypse is about how a catastrophic event occurs after Professor Brains mysteriously goes missing, in which an extremely powerful and unstable version of the AOZ Zomb Bomb goes off and sends a shockwave throughout all of time that throws the entire timeline into becoming a complete apocalyptic wasteland that sends all of civilisation back 100 years and kills millions. Barry and Craig, who appear to be the sole survivors of the event, crawl out of the wreckage of the professor's laboratory and must find a way to survive and possibly restore what was destroyed, rebuild a new life from the ashes or abandon ship and try to find an entirely new timeline where none of this ever happened. the story is pretty focused on the characters and how their personalities could change based on the events they go through. it's kind of a "what if i put these two through hell" type of thing lol.

i haven't planned this out completely, but the whole reason the apocalypse happens is because Brains has been slowly going absolutely insane after defeat after defeat and is planning to completely destroy the timeline of any and all trace of Barry Steakfries for good. he ends up having a lot more get in his way than trying to plot the destruction of Barry however, and it only makes him spiral more and more. the thing that tips Brains over the edge is Glorebax repeatedly trying to stop his plans both out of Brains wasting valuable resources on weird experiments and genuine concern for his wellbeing, as Brains has been acting extremely erratic, choosing to isolate himself in a secret underground lab for several weeks at a time and lashing out at anyone who irritates him even a little bit. shit happens, Glorebax discovers the lab and almost manages to completely stop Brains' plans and confiscate his scientific equipment, but he ends up being murdered by Brains in cold blood, taking over RBC and enforcing a sort of dictatorship over the lab and his subjects.

Barry and Craig catch wind of Brains' strange behaviour, and they come across a group of scientists (possibly the Science Team, haven't decided yet) who usher them into an alleyway and explain to them that Brains has been formulating an extremely destructive plan with highly experimental technology, and that if Barry and Craig don't try to stop him soon, the entire timeline as they know it may be completely wiped out. the scientists also explain that they've been in hiding for months and had direct access to Brains' experimental technology. they managed to smuggle it out of the lab to develop specialised gadgets for Barry and Craig to use to protect themselves, should their attempt to stop Brains go sour. they don't know when or where Brains is planning to attack, but they would keep Barry and Craig updated if anything changed.

they never heard a single update from those scientists ever again. not one word. for all they knew, those scientists had just entirely dropped off the face of the earth. the alert that something horrible had happened was extremely sudden. Legitimate Research's scientists rushed and scrambled to send a memo to the duo when they had detected extreme levels of energy coming from a small opening underground. Barry and Craig rushed to the lab as soon as they could, but when they got there, a panicking scientist immeduately shoved them into a nearby portal, crying out that there was absolutely no time to prepare and that they had to stop Brains now. but unfortunately for them, it was already too late. Brains had already activated the bomb, and there were merely seconds left to react, quickly activating the protection gadget, Barry leaps onto Craig and shoves him behind a nearby cabinet, shielding him with his body as the blast ruptured through the laboratory, tearing it and everything surrounding it apart piece by piece as the shockwave ripped through the atmosphere like it was nothing.

miraculously, Barry and Craig survive the blast, though not unscathed at they find themselves trapped under layers of debris and thick heavy dirt. luckily though, the gadget had also survived the blast, although barely, as its power was quickly starting to drain and flicker away, jeaopardising their survival. acting fast, Barry yanked Craig up from the ground and used the gadget's forcefield to deflect the wreckage away as they both hurriedly climbed out into the surface, where they found...

nothing. absolutely nothing. everything they had ever known had been completely and utterly wiped away. what was once a lively neighbourhood full of cosy houses and families was transformed into a horrific wasteland littered with the barely recognisable rotting remains of a life that no longer existed anymore. Legitimate Research's laboratory had completely vanished. the skies were no longer blue and sunny. they were instead painted with a sickly and unnatural green hue, which in itself was being strangled away by a thick and ominous dark smog that turned the whole world black. the grass was no longer green. it was grey, burnt and withered, with every single surrounding plant being reduced to a barely recognisable shrivel of its former self. it was as though the earth had been completely sucked of its life force, and the only thing that was left was a zombified carcass that only persisted because there was no hell lower than here for it to go to. the only thing Barry and Craig could do was stare, completely frozen in place as the feeling of pure, unadulterated terror and dread washed over them, and they realised they had failed their mission. they couldn't save it in time. everyone was counting on them to save their world from a terrible fate, and they failed. and now, everything was gone.

so after all that exposition: why does Barry look the way he does? wtf happened to him? well, at some point in the story, Barry ends up in an ambush that leads to him being brutally attacked by a horde of flesh-eating zombies, and he is in REALLY rough shape. he's quickly outnumbered by just how many zombies there were, causing him to lose an eye and have his entire arm torn off. this immediately sends his body into a pained shock, and he would have ended up as zombie food if it weren't for Craig swooping in at the last second, repelling the zombie horde away and getting him the hell out of there. this scene is supposed to have huge character significance for both Barry and Craig, as it exposes both of their biggest flaws and establishes a major character arc for them. the reason Barry ended up in a huge zombie squabble was because he was in a state of denial that the world they knew was gone now, trying to act as though everything would be fine if they just tracked down a time-travel device and distracting himself by trying to be the tough action hero. he couldn't handle his crushing guilt over the fact that he failed to stop the world from being destroyed and tried to "make up for it" by repeatedly saving the day and refusing to let anything stop him until he was sure he won. Barry severely overestimated how much he could handle on his own and got severely hurt in the process, which gave him a huge reality check that things aren't just going to return to how they once were anymore, no matter how much he wants them to. losing his arm and becoming disabled puts things in perspective for Barry and makes him realise that no matter how much of a hero he wants to be, he's still only human, and the only thing left to do now is to try to adapt and survive. but at the same time, losing something as important as his arm so suddenly in an attack he deliberately went into out of extreme guilt for something be believed he was the sole cause of sends him into a deep depression, and he isn't sure if he can live on like this. he gets better though :3

as for Craig, i haven't fully thought out what happens to him yet. i know i want him to become more courageous and play the role of a no-nonsense combat medic. the significance of the zombie attack scene for him is that it explores Craig's biggest flaw: his fear. Craig has always considered himself a coward. he's often too afraid to face any danger on his own and instead hides away and shuts his eyes until it's all over. this has lead to some pretty bad self-esteem issues and a never-ending cycle of anxiety and guilt. he knows how much of a coward he is. he's hyper-aware of it, in fact. the cycle goes like this: Craig becomes afraid of a dangerous situation -> his immediate reaction is to flee and hide, waiting for someone else to sort out the danger for him or for the danger to sort itself out -> Craig emerges unscathed, but incredibly guilty that he did nothing to save himself and had to rely entirely on the help of others to save him, especially if the danger could have put that person in significant harm -> he ruminates on this guilt, his mind declaring himself a coward and a damsel for being unable to help himself in the face of danger -> Craig is left incapacitated by guilt, thinking himself a worse person for being afraid and deciding that because he couldn't save himself, he'd be too helpless and weak to get himself out of any danger on his own, so he doesn't even try -> repeat.

so, here he is, in another dangerous situation where he could get severely hurt if he doesn't flee and hide away. he's incredibly scared, and because of the way he's conditioned himself to feel about his abilities, he does what he would always do in a situation like this: he hides and watches from the sidelines until the danger goes away. but as he watches on from his little hiding place, a horrible feeling of dread burns up inside him as he notices that Barry is struggling. he's struggling a lot. they're all closing in on him, and he's visibly scrambling to reload his shotgun in time before another zombie attempts to pounce on top of him, and he's running out of strength to just keep pushing them away without the opportunity to attack them back. Craig's entire body is struck with intense burning adrenaline, his heart practically beating out of his chest as he realises that he NEEDS to get out there and help his partner before he's eaten alive. hiding away won't do him any good now. the only way to save this is to attack. with trembling knees and shaking fists, he quickly dashes into action, grabbing a bag full of medical supplies he had stashed nearby and snatching up a blunt metal pole and bolting towards the horde of zombies. he charges at them at full speed, nearly tripping over his own feet from the sheer velocity he was willing to go just to save the one he loves. he raises his weapon and swings hard into the face of his enemies, striking and shoving his way through the horde as he advances closer and closer to Barry's whereabouts. terror fills his entire body as he hears Barry's bloodcurdling cries of pain, and a voice inside his mind tells him that it's already too late to save him and that he should run away while he has the chance. but even then, Craig still persists, his entire form having already gone into overdrive, each cry for help only making him advance faster and faster through the horde. his body was like a machine, instantly converting terror into energy, which only increased the more and more fear he felt.

finally, he had done it. with one last mighty whack of his weapon to the head of a zombie who was about to plunge its teeth into Barry's chest, he quickly hoistered the injured monster hunter up onto his shoulders and made a mad dash into the distance, trying to get as far away from the horde as he possibly could. he had ran into the entrance of a dark and musty abandoned house and, once the coast was clear, urgently tore open the medical bag and spilled an anti-septic solution all around the torn stump where Barry's arm once was and laid him down to rest. his limbs were shaking like mad, his heart felt as though it were going to burst, and his mind was echoing with an ear-piercingly loud drum that just kept beating and beating and beating against his skull. he was absolutely and totally wracked with fear. but he did it. he had proven himself. he was no longer a coward. oh yeah and his bf was safe too yaaaaayyyy!!

ok so. after spoiling literally everything that happens in the story, this is my new and improved redesign for TA!Barry :D i'm really proud of it and i'm really glad i decided to revisit it again!! i want to make a design for Craig but it's like 12 am right now and i've spent WAY too much time writing this damn post and spilling out every idea i have for this au looolll. hopefully reading allat wasn't too much. i love my little apocalypse idiot and i want to draw him again some time! he's fun to draw :D (also i forgot to mention some things, like how Barry uses the brace-and-go and hollywood one-armed shotgun techniques, how i wanted to put a symbol on his eyepatch and how i want to come up with a design for a robotic arm Craig would make for him later in the story, but it's so late and i'm so tired that i'm not gonna bother adding that in,.,, ecks dee)