HATE THE CLUB

HATE THE CLUB

Pairing : Idol Namjoon x non idol female reader

Summary: You can’t stay away from him - at least that’s what it feels like the universe is telling you. You and the man of your dreams, somewhere that you both hate, just to end up in a place you both love- his bed.

Genre: very mild angst, fluff, smut.

Warnings: oral (f) receiving, fingering, pussy smacking, Unprotected sex/ he finishes inside ( pls don't do this lol) making out, Namjoon is so sweet but ofc he is! Readers a creamer, Missionary, slight yearning. MDNI

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“Before you even ask me , I came ‘cause I knew you’d show up…”

“This isn’t even your scene, what if someone sees you?” You ask, searching the area. You would hate to be at the scene of what you know for sure would make the headlines, Although the 6ft of sin standing in front of you doesn’t seem to care.

Namjoon would be anything you needed. He decided that the moment you entered his life. You affected him. You always have. The first girl who understood him- not just intellectually, but emotionally. It’s always been you. Even if his career made it difficult, he would always choose you. Even right now standing in the middle of the club -where he knew it could get him in to some heavy shit, but none of that mattered. His heart didn’t agree with the opinions clouding his brain about staying away from you. You’re beautiful inside and out, it doesn’t matter how much you attempt to make him uninterested, all the attempts of staying away from you , horrible attempts from you where you tried to be selfless - he on the other hand wouldn’t stop trying. He’s never been a quitter, so why be different today?

“You really shouldn’t be here Joonie.” You say as you pull him somewhere into a dark corner.

The club is not a place Namjoon would decide to spend his time on a Thursday night. Neither would you, you’re only here with your friends-who you abandoned, because you needed an escape. Something to get you to stop thinking about him. Of course, he would be here though. It’s as if the universe pulled you together, no matter how far you tried to run away.

Namjoon can’t take his eyes off of you. He heard you loud and clear but all he’s thinking about is the nickname at the end of your statement. It always sounds so sweet when you say it. Everything you do drives him mad. He didn’t have a choice. It’s been this way from the moment you looked at him. He remembers the day vividly- but it isn’t the time to reminisce. He’s focused on now.

“You missed everything I said…I’m here because of you. I don’t care if I should be or not. I don’t care if it’s not my usual place to kick it at either. I’m here for you.” He reiterates.

He knows you understand. You’re just doing the thing you always do- putting up a wall.

“How long are you in town for?” You sigh. You can’t even believe you’re debating doing this. If only you didn’t want him just as bad.

“Tomorrow afternoon.” He’s searching your eyes. He needs you.

“This isn’t a good idea and you know that…” you roll your bottom lip through your teeth and shake your head before making eye contact with him.

He tilts his head, mimicking the same facial expression you’ve just given him.

“Fuck it. I don’t care. You can leave me after…I can’t stop thinking about you.” He’s pleading at this point but he’s never been too proud to do that either- not when it comes to you.

“Please.” He mutters looking at you. You’re screwed. You were the moment he walked in. You knew that too.

“Fuck it. Take me to your place.” You say. You’ve never been good at pushing him away. Every attempt is always a failure.

Namjoon wastes no time. The quicker he can get you alone, the quicker you can be skin-to-skin. Molded together and intertwined. He sticks his hand out for you to place yours in, and leads you out of the club.

The ride to his place is filled with no words, but tons of sexual tension. You wish you could convince him to stay with you- long term. You have always told yourself to be selfless, let him chase his dreams, and support him as best as you can, so you won’t interfere. You can’t deny it though. Namjoon has always been everything you want in a man. Smart, determined, well-mannered, good in bed, He’s your earth in every sense of the word.

Even now, your enamored as you watch his jaw clench as he parks the car. You reach to undo your seatbelt but Namjoon stops you.

“Come closer.” He says in a low tone, motioning you with his finger closer to his face.

He’s losing his composure. He really is just like you. Eager for what awaits. You do as he says and lean closer, brushibg your nose against his but right before he can make a move. You giggle and send his heart into a frenzy.

“Look who’s all worked up. When I told you to take me to your place, I meant inside.” You plant a kiss on his nose and then open your door.

“Whatever you want, darling.” He chuckles and you have to refrain from jumping on him at that moment. He knows you like it when he calls you that.

Once you make it to the steps, that’s when the fun starts. Your lips are immediately on each other. Hungry, acting like starved animals. When he finally reaches his door he pulls away. He knows you are antsy by the way you’re attacking his neck sucking on his most sensitive spots. He swears, it’s never taken him this long to open a door, and once he finally hears the lock retract he pushes the door open, spins you around so you’re in front of him, picks you up, making you straddle him. Your hands immediately wrap around his neck as you continue kissing him all over.

“You’re fucking needy.” He says nudging your head up so your lips connect and throwing his keys across the counter. Sliding his shoes off and carrying you to the countertop.

“I am. I missed you.” You say, nothing but truth behind your statement.

honesty- a shared trait between you that he respects so much.

You reach for his belt buckle and start to unfasten it.

You only have until tomorrow, you’re not here to waste a second.

As your hands find a place in his briefs, Namjoon starts to remove your top. He’s trying not to rip it off but he fails- he’s eager and you can’t help but laugh again. flinging your hair behind your shoulders, and covering your chest.

“I missed you too.” He says and smiles at you. Capturing your heart, with his dragon-like eyes and deep dimples.

“The counter was a cute idea but, I think I want you in the bed.” He pulls your hands away from your chest, placing them on his shoulders.

He picks you up again and starts kissing you on the way to his bedroom. your low moans into the kiss aren’t helping him right now. He’s pretty sure he could come through his pants right now. He can’t wait any longer. He needs to taste you, to be in you. He could do this for days, but unfortunately, time is not his friend. So he tosses you onto the bed and removes his shirt. His body is glistening. Chest heaving up and down in anticipation.

“Joonie…” you sound just as desperate. Like you’ve been longing for him.

“Shh baby, I’m right here.” He says as he climbs on top of you. your lips reconnect and he pins your hands above your head.

“Take your time?” You ask and he nods as he starts kissing down your neck. He knows you hate when he marks you, but you also know him. He thinks it’s sexy when he can see the little bruises he leaves on you. Little reminders he etches in your skin before he has to leave. The sad part for you is that they are just like him- disappearing acts.

He slowly but surely makes his way to your bra and slides the straps down your shoulder.

“I missed hearing you say my name.” He says as he fully removes it, leaving open kisses down your body. Getting the response he wished for.

His hands slide up your skirt and he starts to rub you through your panties. You’re aching and he can feel you throbbing against his fingers.

“Joon, please…” you say as you moan, reaching and pushing his hand to apply more pressure.

He takes the hint and slides further down. Looking up at you with his lust filled eyes, kissing your waist, and slowly sliding down your skirt and panties. You’re now fully undressed underneath him. He loves the view. You’ve always been shy so once he sees you attempt to cover your chest for the second time, He restrains your arms again with his right hand.

“You’re the one who asked me to take my time, now look at who’s worked up.” He teases.

You lift up, and try to kiss him but he just smiles some more against your lips. As he parts your legs, he rubs up your thigh and then you feel his hand right where you need him.

He tilts his head as you both look each other in the eyes. Kissing you one last time, parting your lips, and smacking your pussy. Capturing the moan you let out in his mouth.

“Mmmmmmm.” You say as your eyebrows furrow in.

Fuck. Still vulnerable, still responsive. He thinks to himself. He wants to be the only person who can make you feel like this.

He pulls himself away and immediately puts his face where he belongs. He

“Oh fuck.” You gasp at the pleasure as your breath hitches in your throat.

He takes his time eating you out. Like it might be the last time, you both know it never is because you can’t seem to walk away. He enjoys the way you squirm underneath him. The head pushes telling him you need more, the way you moan his name out in repetition. He could never let you go. Not when you show him how good he makes you feel.

“Joon, oh my god…right there.”

He follows the instructions you give. Sliding a finger into you, pumping it in and out as you continue with your whimpers and cries of pleasure. He adds another finger and glides into you, a steady rhythm of penetration and the gentle force from his tongue, sends you over the edge. He laps up your juices that he knows he’s responsible for. You only cum like this for him. You’re his no matter how much time you spend apart.

“Come here…” you say panting.

He climbs back up your legs and kisses you in the mouth. Lightly smacking your clit as he does. You just came but Namjoon knows you have more.

“Joonie …”

“Hmm.”

“Mmm, I wanna cum with you.” You say. Eyes rolling back feeling yourself close yet again since he is still playing with your pussy. You want to be with him like this for longer. Be in his arms for longer. Cum for him anytime he wants you to.

“You sure you’re ready?” He asks and you nod.

“Yes, if you don’t stop I’m gonna cum.” You say finally having the energy to move his hand which earns you a laugh from the man hovering above you.

He removes his pants all the way finally. You were just as desperate as him. Like usual.

You set yourself up on your elbows to take at the sight in front of you.

“You’re bad.” You say biting your lip and looking him up and down.

“Could say the same about you.” He says as he crawls back over to you. He takes his time lining himself up to be inside the walls most familiar to him.

“I can’t stay away from you.” He admits and your heart nearly breaks. You give him a small smile. You know you can’t either.

“Hurry up. I miss-.”

You both moan upon his entrance. He’s looking you right in the eyes as he pumps in and out of you. Watching the way you cream, it feels like every time he removes himself there’s more of you spilling out onto him.

“Damn baby, look at us…” He says and you meet his gaze.

“You can’t look at me like that.” You say in between your moans

“You don’t mind.” He’s right, you don’t. But you should- you’ll miss him again. You don’t need the visual of him looking like this engraved in your mind but, it’s better than the memory you’ll have when he leaves tomorrow you tell yourself.

His deep and slow strokes make you feel so full.

“This is so much better than the club.” You say and you look into his eyes and he can’t help but give you a grin.

He reaches for your left hand and intertwines it with his.

“Yeah?” He asks as you moan out and put your free hand on his bicep that’s caging you in.

“Yeah, I hate the club.” You double down on your statement because it’s true. In more ways than one. You hate the club because it isn’t your scene. You hate the club because it isn’t going to help you forget Namjoon, it’ll bring you to him for whatever reason. The universe always puts him in your orbit.

Your pussy is milking him for everything he has, creaming all over him, If he wouldn’t have showed up- he doesn’t even want to think about that. A day without being inside of you always feels like years have passed by. Months feel like centuries.

“Fuck Joonie… just like that.” You moan out and he can’t stop himself from pecking your lips afterwards.

“You are my brightest star. Did you know that?” He says as he listens to your moans. They’re so soft, so alluring.

“I- I’m close.” You manage to muster up and he nods.

“I know baby, I can tell by the way you’re squeezing me. Shit” He isn’t too far off either.

“You’re gonna cum with me, right baby?” You ask and he nods.

He hurries and presses his lips to yours, thrust getting sloppy and lazy.

Your breath gets caught In your throat as you feel the knot deep in your stomach unravel.

“Shit, shit, shit.” He chants out as he empties himself inside of you.

He collapses onto your chest and you stroke his hair. Then the air gets heavy. You can feel it- time is going to run out.

“That was amazing, as always.” You say and he slowly pulls out of you and lays flat on his back. Eyes facing the ceiling before he glances over and looks at you.

“Be my girlfriend? No more of this not knowing how long it’ll take to see each other bullshit. I want you. I’d ask you more romantically but I just … I don’t want you to walk out of the door and me not know what’s next. I want to come home to you. I don’t care about anything else.” He’s serious and it’s everything you wanted to hear, but you’re quiet.

You’re scared. That must be the reason for your silence he assumes.

“You want me? You’re not worried about the public?”

He was right. You are scared. So he grabs your hand and kisses it softly.

“I’ll protect you from anyone, anything. No. I’m not worried, because I need you and I don’t care

who likes it or not.” He says as he reaches for your hand and kisses the back of it.

“Well then I’m Namjoon’s girlfriend then.” You say

Smiling but you’re not done yet

“Promise me you’ll still be the same person you are. I can’t handle anything else.”

He chuckles and pulls you into him.

“People change baby we need to grow but my love won’t unless it’s for the better.” He states matter of factly.

“Love?” You ask as you search his eyes.

“Love.” He says and you nod.

A kiss sealing the deal. Passionate, Fiery, but also just as soft as flower petals- just like the man who is now yours to claim.

“Mmm, princess can I tell you something?” He says as he pulls away.

“Anything.”

“I think love the club.” He says chuckling and you can’t help but laugh.

“It brought me the best sex of my life and my dream boyfriend, I might suddenly love the club too.” You say as you cup his face.

“Love?” He ask in the same tone as you did previously.

“Love,” you say stealing a kiss and sealing the deal.

A/n : let’s be fr. I love a happy ending lol

bts and how they would kiss their s/o

pairing: bf!bts x reader genre: fluff warnings: a bit suggestive,

namjoon : I feel like he would be really into every kiss. holds you by the back of your neck and waist, wanting to hold you closer. would pout when you pull away to quickly for his taste. loves your lips and how they feel.

jin : would definitely tease you a little. would smirk and wait until you use your words to ask for a kiss. "aw my baby wants a kiss?" but then would be really sensual and make you breathless and chasing his lips for more.

yoongi : such a soft boy. would take his time and build up the moment. loves to hold you hand while he kisses you, would maybe hold your jaw as well, both hands holding you still while he takes his time.

hoseok : depends on the mood. likes to smack his lips against yours with a "mwah" sound, letting everyone know where his affections lie. biggest smile on his lips as he pulls back to see your blush. but then he can also be a deep kisser, loves holding you by your hips against his body. loves to hear the little moans you let escape and swallows them.

jimin : a very sensual kisser. loves you and your lips and wants to devour you whole. hands caressing every inch of you he can. can't go five minutes without kissing you. very affectionate and loves when your lips swell and sometimes lets his intrusive thoughts win and bites your lip.

taehyung : very hands on and loves to pull you into him. so sweet and loves feeling you against him, hands wrapped around your back. enthusiastic and just giggles into the kiss, too wrapped up in the happiness he feels when with you.

jungkook : very passionate. gets excited every time he is with you and loves to touch you, holding hands, his hand on your thigh, cupping the back of your neck or your cheeks. leaves you gasping for breathe. he can't get enough of you and the taste of you on his tongue.

Safe Space

Seokjin x Reader

Summary: Just a lil blurb about comforting Jin after a tough day.

Warnings: slight angst, not proofread

A/N: Thanks to @casuallyimagining and @feminympho for requesting this, as well as the lovely anon who sent this headcanon! This is a lil eh, but I tried.🤷 Hopefully you’ll still like it!💜

Masterlist

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Jin let his bag hit the floor with a thud as he entered the house, heading straight into the living room and falling face down on the sofa with a thump, letting out a muffled groan of frustration.

“Bad day?”

His head popped up, not realizing you were home yet.

You stood in the kitchen doorway, cup of tea in hand, eyeing his tired form with cautious concern.

“It’s nothing.” He said, slumping back against the cushions.

“Are you sure?” You asked, coming to sit next to him, rubbing his back soothingly.

“No.” He said after a moment, looking up at you. “But I don’t want to drag your mood down just cause I’m frustrated.”

You frowned at him. “Do you feel dragged down when I vent about my problems?”

“No.” He said in a small voice.

“So why would it be any different for you?” You smiled at him encouragingly. “I know it’s difficult sometimes, but whatever you need, I’m here for you.”

He hesitated, sitting up slowly before beginning to speak.

“It’s just…” He sighed. “The company made a big deal about rescheduling rehearsals for today, even though we were exhausted from traveling the past few weeks, and when we got there, the choreographer was late and kept getting annoyed at everyone for messing up. And then…”

Once he started, it was like he couldn’t stop, releasing all the day's frustrations, all of the shitty feelings he had been bottling up for the past days and weeks in order to just get through.

You didn’t say anything, just humming along as he spoke, dragging your fingers across his back in the same soothing pattern you did to help him fall asleep.

By the time he had finished, his voice had crept up into a yell, leaving the room starkly quiet in contrast as he finally fell silent, the hands that had been slowly clenching into fists in his lap finally relaxing again.

“Sorry.” He said, softening his tone. His throat was dry, causing his voice to crack slightly, but his chest felt five pounds lighter, able to breathe properly again.

“You have nothing to apologize for,” You said calmly, passing him your forgotten cup of tea. “You need to let it out sometimes.”

You had known something had been bothering him, he had been quieter than usual, his smile slightly forced, not fully reaching his eyes. And although it hurt you to see him pull back as he had, you had tried to be patient and wait for him to talk about it when he was ready, not wanting to push him.

When he lifted his eyes to meet yours, you were smiling at him softly, but not pityingly.

“Feel any better?” You asked gently.

“A bit,” He let out a weak chuckle. “Thank you.”

“Thank you for letting me in.” You said, brushing your thumbs over his cheeks. He hadn’t even realized a few stray tears had slipped out till you were gently wiping them away.

You smiled, kissing his cheek. “How about you go change into something comfy and let me look after you?“

“Okay.” He replied, but he didn’t move just yet.

Staring down at you, he was suddenly struck by how lucky he felt to have you. You never judged him or tried to fix his problems for him, you just let him be. He never had to pretend with you, he could let anything out, good or bad, without fear of rejection. Although you may have only been together for a comparatively short time, you had become his safe space.

“Why are you staring at me like that?” You asked, shifting awkwardly under his gaze.

He shook his head.

“I just love you.” He said simply, earning a flustered grin from you.

“I love you too.” You said quietly.

He pulled you close, resting his head on top of yours, taking in the scent of your shampoo as he let out a deep breath, feeling peaceful for the first time in days.

His problems might still be there, but they didn’t seem as bad right now, knowing that he had you to lean on and to keep him safe.

Taglist: @sopebubbles-replies @btsw1fe @this-must-be-my-tardis @whitefoxgirl @bethanysnow @coffeedepressionsoup @main-bangtansmauyeondan @feminympho @a-gayish-unicorn @dfqcsqueen @mother2monsters

bts and how they would love their plus size s/o

pairings: bts x reader genre: fluff, smut, warnings: suggestive but also more, face sitting, thigh riding, body worship, possessive jungkook, hobo is a boob man, mr tongue technology, masterlist

Namjoon

loves to kiss your stretch marks. like absolutely loves them. loves to trace them as well

"they give me a map to loving you"

insists on cuddling on the couch, knowing there isn't a lot of room so you have to lay on him

"it's okay, baby, come lay on me"

loves when you where his clothes, especially when you only wear one of his shirts (loves how they barely cover your thighs)

his favorite physical part about you is your thighs, they literally make him drool

"c'mere babygirl. let me help you" when he sees you struggling with your thoughts. he knows you constantly think you're too heavy or big for him. he's not having it

holds your hips and guides your movements as you ride his thigh. loves knowing he can make you cum with just his thighs, flexing it and holding you tight.

Jin

also a thigh man but for different reasons (kind of)

loves wrapping his arms around you and holding you from behind

loves to make new recipes for you to try and test out

loves that he can provide for you and your shared love of food

"just one more minute, baby" when you try to get out of bed but he isn't done cuddling you yet

will happily hype you up in new clothes

"world wide beautiful" is your new title

his love of eating translates to other things as well

"please babygirl" as he pleads for you to sit on his face

will happily die under your pussy and the way your thighs clench around his head when you cum

loves to take care of you and provide for you

Yoongi

doesn't take anyone's shit when it comes to you

very protective lover

don't have to think around him at all

will only do interviews with weverse if even one person does an unflattering article about you (will sue anyone and everyone)

at first you are uncomfortable with his constant touches and hungry gazes but then they become almost comforting

always keeps snacks for you two to share, especially tangerines

writes numerous songs for you

loves to hold you with his hand resting on your stomach (will rub at the stretch marks and whisper absolute desire in your ear)

loves to claim you in his studio, vocal about his desire and love for you

passionate in his body worship of you, especially when he finds out how much you love his tongue and how it feels on you

"feel so good against me, princess"

Hosoek

loves to dress you and help expand your fashions sense

is the one to help you feel more confident in your body and happy to show it off

loves when you come home and do a fashion show of him in your new clothes (especially when you buy some lingerie)

can't keep his hands off of you

ever

loves how soft your skin is and is constantly fondling your curves

wants to just hold your breasts in his hands

says his hands could be a better bra for you (hates how you end up with marks from the wires in your bras and how they hurt at the end of the day)

loves to just randomly nibble at your skin (thinks it looks delicious and loves the giggles you make every time)

"all of this, just for me" as he thrusts deeply into you, kissing at your breasts

Jimin

loves how warm you are and will always be found cuddling you no matter where you both are

finds you absolutely adorable and smiles wide every time you come into a room

loves to dress you up and take pictures of you (keeps you as his lock screen and home screen)

can get jealous when other people look at you

"say you're mine, baby"

is there to listen and help you with your own body image issues,

is always there to remind you how beautiful you are

is completely into body worship

"look so pretty for me, all dressed up like this"

would also love face sitting to be honest. like cannot get enough of the way you look down at him, pulling at his hair as you cum

Taehyung

thinks nothing of your weight until he sees you looking in the mirror, holding and becoming insecure over every one of your "problem areas"

will have nothing of you thinking you have problem areas

thinks you're a goddess

"all art work must be thoroughly examined to be fully appreciated"

will spend hours making you feel good and loving on each of you "problem areas" tell you each reason why he loves you

loves to see you in his jackets,

ends up buying matching outfits for you to wear out

will kiss you every couple minutes, just because he loves the feeling of your lips

Jungkook

would be the person to keep going to the gym for you

"I will always be able to carry you"

loves to manhandle you (knowing you get absolutely horny for him when he does so)

is possessive of you and your body

loves when you were dresses that are sort of revealing because it means you're feeling good in your body (and he's the only one who can touch you)

his favorite position is when you ride him so he can see all of you

especially loves watching your breasts bounce from each thrust up he makes

loves seeing his handprints on your hips or ass from you riding him

is also into body worship because he loves your body and just how perfect it is for him

"so perfect for me, baby. take my cock so well"

“Miss You”

Jin x Reader

Summary: You and Jin had always been close, but following his enlistment, you realize that there might be much more between you than just friendship

Word Count: 4.0k(wtf?!)

Warnings: angst, pining, swearing, lil suggestive at the end, not proofread

A/N: A massive thank you to @coffeedepressionsoup for this request and for being so patient with me while I worked on it! This really got away from me, lol, but I really love how it turned out and hope you will too!

Masterlist

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"Why am I so fucking nervous?” You wondered to yourself as you sat waiting in your car, glancing around the parking lot of the restaurant in search of the familiar figure of your best friend. “This man has seen me at my worst, he’s not gonna care about my outfit."

But still your fingers found their way back to your sleeve, fidgeting with the fabric anxiously, finding it impossible to get it to sit to your satisfaction.

Dinners with Jin had once been such a common occurrence for the two of you that you would naturally show up at each others places without notice, oftentimes still in work or rehearsal clothes and messy hair.

You and Jin had been friends for years, meeting not long after you first moved to Seoul, and in essence, your relationship boiled down to that you irritated the shit out of each other, but that was why you loved each other. It wasn’t uncommon for you to greet each other with nicknames like “jackass” and “idiot”, or to treat each other to things like ice cream topped with fish sauce instead of chocolate syrup.

Some in your friend group found your dynamic a little peculiar to say the least, but they didn't question it much. The two of you were simply comfortable enough to be your true ridiculous selves together.

For all of your more childish behaviors though, you both knew you could count on the other for anything, whether that was being a shoulder to cry on when you got dumped by your first real boyfriend, or comforting him as he poured out his fears of keeping up with the demands of Idol life. You trusted each other with every version of yourselves, which was quite different from almost every other friendship you had.

Indeed, the only thing you had truly kept hidden from him was the not so small crush you had developed for him over the years.

It wasn’t exactly a shocking development; neither of you had particularly fulfilling dating lives, and you tended to spend most your nights off at each other's places because that just felt easier, more comfortable. You two had even joked together that you might as well date, but it of course never went beyond jokes.

Part of you wanted to be honest with him about your feelings, but it didn’t feel right to dump that kind of information on him when he was already dealing with so much.

What if he didn’t feel the same? Were you really willing to risk one of the most important friendships in your life on a maybe? And even if he did feel the same, which you very much doubted, what would you be able to do about it now that he was going away for over a year?

No, it was much better, much kinder, to just keep things the way they were, and to love and support him solely as a friend.

As the time for Jin to enlist drew closer, your hangouts had taken on a slightly more bittersweet tone, realizing more and more how much you were going to miss seeing each other.

Neither of you spoke about it though, playing it off with jokes about how grateful you’d be to have the other out your hair.

“At least once you’ve left, I’ll be able to watch good tv again.” You’d teased one evening after losing another round of rock, paper, scissors for what show to watch.

“Ha, as if! I bet you won’t make it two weeks before you’re back to watching my picks.” He’d retorted, flopping back against your couch. “Face it, you’re gonna be totally lost without me.”

You’d rolled your eyes, but a tiny voice in the back of your mind feared that he was right.  

But then, the time came for him to leave, and reality hit much harder than either of you had anticipated.

You had thought that perhaps the distance and time apart might help you get over your lingering feelings for your friend, but instead, his sudden absence had just left a painfully obvious hole in your life and left you feeling terribly alone. You hadn’t realized just how much space he took up in your day to day life until he was gone.

Everything felt off balance. Evenings at home, which had once been your favorite, were now dark and dull, dinners quiet and lonely. Your favorite cafes and shops were now far too loud and crowded on your own.

You could tell that he wasn’t dealing with the separation well either, though he tried to keep up his normal cheery disposition whenever you called. But each time, you noticed the way his smiles didn’t always reach his eyes, or that his laughs were just a little more forced.

You tried to keep in touch through text, sending each other your usual memes and updates, but as time went on, the frequency began to slowly lessen more and more.

It was better when you were able to see each other in person, able to pretend for those few hours that almost nothing had changed, but it seemed more and more like the universe was against you having even that. On the days that Jin managed to get leave, something always seemed to interfere with you seeing each other, whether it was work schedules, family emergencies, or random stomach flus. Last time, you’d only managed to meet up for a quick coffee before he had to leave again.

To your credit though, the two of you never forgot a single holiday or special occasion for the other, sending gifts and trying your hardest to meet around the time of your birthdays.

This was one of those such days, just a week or so past your birthday, that you were currently sat waiting for him to show up.

He had promised to treat you to a meal for your birthday, just like he did every year, so you had picked a place close to his base that you knew you both loved. It wasn’t anything fancy, just a little locally owned barbeque place, but it was where the two of you had met several times before, and it had come to feel like ‘your place’.

Finally, you spotted his familiar figure appear, leaning up against the side of the building as he glanced around for you, looking gorgeous as ever in the golden evening light.

Exiting your car, you half ran across the parking lot, tackling him in a tight bear hug.

“Oof! Hi, Bug.” He greeted you breathlessly, steading the two of you before returning your embrace.

“Wassup, dork.” You said, grinning up at him.

“Yah! I’m a military man now, you should speak to me with some respect.” He scolded you.

“Yeah, not gonna happen.” You snickered, earning an eye roll from him.

“Alright, menace,” He shoved you off playfully. “Let's go eat, I’m starving.”

The two of you fell back into your usual rhythm with each other, swapping stories about work, family, his new friends from the base, the new coffee place near your apartment that you hated, anything that crossed your minds. But throughout the evening, you couldn’t help but notice the strange shift in the air.

Maybe it was the fact that this was the most time that you’d spent together in ages, but the whole evening had a nervous energy to it, almost like a first date.

You caught yourself admiring little things about Jin that you had only fleetingly paid mind to before, if at all.

The way he gripped his chopsticks or spoke with his hands, bringing to mind the numerous times he’d gripped tight onto your hand to keep you from getting separated in busy crowds. You wondered if they felt the same, or had the past year of work made them rough?

“Y/n?”

You blinked, Jin eyeing you mild amusement.

“You okay? Or am I boring you already?” He asked with faux indignation. 

“No no, sorry.” You shook your head, trying to ignore the sudden heat in your face. Had you been staring at him the whole time? You desperately hoped not.

Then again, it wasn’t just you acting strangely either.

More than once through the evening, you could have sworn you caught Jin staring at your mouth as you’d spoke, fidgeting with the collar of his shirt, drawing your attention to his outfit, noting that he seemed to have dressed up a bit more than usual, just like you had. 

The perceived change in both your demeanors lead to several weighted silences, but there was also an nervous undercurrent of excitement to them, both of you fleetingly meeting the others eye, only to then be caught and left temporarily unable to look away. It was as if you were both waiting, daring the other to address it, but neither of you did.

Inevitably though, it grew too late to ignore, the restaurant around you now nearly empty, the sky outside long turned black.

As you exited the restaurant, a cloud of silence fell over the two of you again, this time though it was more mournful, sensing the impending goodbye, not knowing when you would get to see each other like this again. 

“You’re sure you’ll be okay getting home?” Jin asked softly. “It’s a bit of a drive.”

“Yes Mom, I’ll be fine.” You tried to tease, but the words came out without any real edge to them.

The two of you stared at each other for a long moment, Jin chewing his lip nervously, as if he wanted to say something more, but he didn’t.

Suddenly, he wordlessly pulled you into a tight hug, something he had done a thousand times before, but something in the way he held you this time made your heart ache, holding onto him a little tighter this time, savoring the warmth of him around you for just a little longer.

"I miss you." The words slipped out before you realized, so small and heavy with heartbreak, drifting away in the night air as you kept your face pressed against the material of his jacket, hoping that maybe he hadn’t heard you.

You felt him freeze for the smallest fraction of a second before his arms tightened around you, hugging you closer.

“Me too.” He breathed, barely audible.

You bit your lip, trying desperately to will away the sudden stinging wetness in your eyes.

After a long moment, you both became of aware of how you were holding onto each other, parting awkwardly as you cleared your throat, looking anywhere but him.

“G-goodnight, Jin.” You muttered hurriedly. 

“Night.” He replied, taking a small step back before giving an awkward half bow. “Stay safe and eat well, yeah?” His eyes were similarly misted over, matching your own.

“Mhm, you too.” You nodded quickly, looking away again.

Feeling your already wavering facade threatening to crack, you nodded and turned away, walking quickly to your car without looking back at him.

The next few months passed relatively quickly, but following that night there had been a palpable shift between the two of you.

Calls began to lessen. Then texts. You claimed work was just really hectic and you were just busy, but it wasn't the whole truth. 

The truth was you were terrified.

Memories of that evening plagued you constantly, as did your accidental confession.

It was just three words, a simple and perfectly innocent statement given the context of your situation, but they had held more meaning than you intended them to, and you could tell that Jin had picked up on their meaning as well, based on his recent, equally awkward behavior. 

Staring down at your phone, you cursed yourself silently, seeing no new messages from him yet again. If the earlier distance between you had been painful to cope with, the new silence was agony.

Why had you said anything at all?! You were sure you must have freaked him out. 

You considered just being completely honest with him and telling him how you felt, more than once you had written out several long-winded texts in an attempt to explain everything, but each time you’d lost your nerve and deleted it.

At a loss, you did the only thing you could think of, which was nothing.

You stepped back, giving him whatever space he wanted or needed, letting him choose how things would move forward between the two of you.

If he wanted to move on and act like nothing had happened, you’d go right along with him. And if he wanted to talk about it… then you’d face that and accept whatever he had to say.

That decision however, had resulted in Jin overthinking things as well.

He had also been replaying that last dinner with you, his mind drifting back to how pretty you had looked, the nervous flush that had crept over your cheeks as you’d talked, the shape of your lips, how tempting it had been to lean in and-

He shook his head, glancing around quickly as he tried to clear his mind, hoping no one had noticed his lack of focus.

“I miss you…” Those three little words had echoed in Jin’s head for days. They were simple enough, but it was something that neither of you had said in the nearly year and half that he’d been gone. Your quiet confession had caused all the feelings that he had been trying to stifle for ages to rise back to the forefront.

Over the course of your friendship, he’d become increasingly infatuated with you, but he’d always pushed those feelings to the side, fearing that you wouldn’t feel the same, or even if you did, that the complications of dating as an Idol would be too much and drive you apart. 

He had thought he was doing the right thing by keeping his feelings to himself, but your words had made him reconsider.

Unsure how to proceed, he had pulled back slightly as he mentally battled with himself.

But then you had started to pull away as well.

Your shorter messages, the sudden lack of interaction, it all made his stomach sink lower and lower with every passing day. 

He shook his head again.

No. He couldn’t take this.

He decided one of the first things he would do following his discharge was tell you the truth about how he felt, and whatever your response was, he would accept. If you rejected him, he would go back to being just your friend and pretend nothing had happened.

And if you reciprocated his feelings-? He wouldn’t let himself think about that, not yet.

Above all else, you were one of his best friends, and he was not prepared to lose you.

Finally, after what felt like the longest and shortest year and half of his life, Jin received his discharge.

The first few days after coming home were a frenzied blur for Jin.

Between meeting up with family and friends, photoshoots, hosting a fanmeet for Army, and various other schedules, he was absolutely exhausted.

In a way, it was wonderful to be getting back into his chaotic, but familiar routine, but the sudden shift back into ‘civilian life’, if one could call it that, was taking its toll on him all the same.

Everything was so loud and happening so fast, all he really wanted was just to find somewhere quiet to lay low for a few days and do nothing.

Wait no, that wasn't quite true.

He wanted to see you.

Since he’d gotten back, you had sent a few texts, welcoming him home and the like, but he’d yet to get to actually see you, a fact that was beginning to make him increasingly uneasy.

He needed to see you, needed to hear your voice, to tell all the thoughts and feelings that he had realized over the past few months. He could almost feel them, pressing in against his ribcage, squeezing the air from his lungs. He didn’t think he would be able to breathe properly again until he told you how he truly felt.

Luckily, he knew he would have a chance tonight at the party his friends were throwing for him.

It wasn’t anything elaborate, just a get together with some of his friends, with food and drinks, as a way to welcome him home.

Despite the fatigue of the past few weeks, Jin was looking forward to it, if only for the chance to see you again.

But as he scanned around the crowded room, he failed to spot your face.

“Something wrong, Hyung?” One of his friends asked, noting his deflated expression.

“Have you seen Y/n?” He asked, still looking around hopefully. “I thought they’d be here.” 

“Maybe they’re just running late or something?” He offered.

Jin nodded distractedly, ducking off to the side and fishing his phone out of his pocket.

He called your number, but was sent directly to your voicemail. He hung up and tried again, with the same result.

“Everything okay? I really wanted to see you tonight…” He typed out quickly, pressing send as someone else’s conversation caught his attention.

"Y/n? Didn’t they say they had a date tonight or something?"

His head whipped around at their words.

"What date?" He asked, slightly more sharply than he intended.

"I dunno, some blind date that Y/n said their work friend set up.” They shrugged.

“Oh.” Jin felt all the energy in his body slip away, like water down the drain.

Everyone's voices faded into static as Jin stood there motionless, feeling as if the ground below him was slowly swallowing him up.

He was too late. 

In all the months of imagining and planning and hoping, he hadn’t accounted for the fact that he might not be given an opportunity to confess, that you would move on before he had a chance. Because why wouldn’t you? He hadn’t given you any reason not to, if anything quite the opposite. He’d stupidly shied away from you in an attempt to spare himself the awkwardness of having to explain himself to you before he was ready, and now it was too late. He’d fucked up… 

In reality, however, you were not on any such date. You had actually spent the evening curled into a sniffly ball in bed, completely unaware of Jin’s numerous attempts to call you as you faded in and out of a cold meds-induced sleep.

It was true that your friend had tried to set you up with one of their guy friends, and while they had sounded very nice, you had politely declined, telling her you appreciated the offer, but you weren’t looking to date anyone at the moment.

You didn’t mention that it was mainly because you were still hung up on your best friend, but no one needed to know that, including the best friend in question.

You’d had every intention of going to his welcome home party, and to hopefully clear up the awkwardness between the two of you, but fate had decided to screw you over once more by having you come down with a cold that day, leaving you an achy, feverish mess in bed.

When you woke up the next morning, or early afternoon to be more precise, your head still slightly wobbly as you checked your phone, you felt your stomach drop as you scrolled through the multiple missed calls and messages from Jin.

You quickly called him back, praying that he wasn’t too upset with you for ignoring his calls, as well as missing his party.

It rang several times, making you worry that he wouldn’t pick up, until you finally heard his voice.

“Hello?” He answered, his tone flat and detached.

“Jin, I’m so sorry, I didn’t see your messages til this morning-” You tried to explain.

“It’s fine.” He stopped you, but you thought you heard a faint sniffle from his end of the line.

“Are you okay?” You asked worriedly.

“M’fine.” He answered flatly, but you thought you recognized that sour tone.

“Are you sure? You sound a little stuffy, you’re not sick too, are you-?” You tried.

“I said I’m fine, Y/n.” He cut you off. “Look, uh, now’s not really a great time to talk, I’ll call you back later, okay?”

“Okay.” You said quietly, heart sinking as the line went dead.

He’d said that he was fine, but his short tone with you had said otherwise. You’d known him long enough to know he was either sick or sulking, and neither of those options sat well with you at the moment.

Before you had fully thought out what you were going to say to him, you were standing outside his door.

He was equally slow in answering the door as he had been on the phone, cracking the door open slowly.

"I was the one who was sick, why do you look like you’ve been through the plague?" You asked wryly, trying to get him to crack a smile, but no such thing happened.

“What are you doing here?” He asked in the same monotone from earlier.

“I came to see if you were okay-”

"I’m fine." He said flatly. 

Oh, he was definitely sulking. It was gonna take a bit more work than you’d initially thought to get him to talk to you then.

"Alright then, what if we-.” You started.

"How was your date?" He asked suddenly, catching you off guard.

"What date?" You asked in confusion.

"The one your friend from work set up.” He said, the distaste clear in his voice.

"Who told you about that?".

"What does it matter? How was it?" He said sharply.

You blinked, staring up at him.

Was that why he was upset about? Not that you missed the party or his calls, but because he thought you’d done so in favor of a date?

"I wouldn’t know, I told them no." You admitted, shrugging indifferently.

He straightened slightly, looking up at you in surprise. "What? Why?"

You hesitated.

You could just say because you weren’t interested, or you could just tell him the whole truth, right here and now. If he rejected you, at least then you would know and you could both move on, rather than slowly ruining your friendship the way you had the past few weeks.

Your hesitation made him suddenly anxious, seeing the conflict in your eyes, afraid to get his hopes up.

"Why didn't you go, Y/n?" He asked again, his voice suddenly low and soft.

It was the same voice that had brought you comfort more times than you could count, the voice that had accompanied numerous midnight conversations. That safe, familiar tone that felt like home.

You realized it was now or never. 

You met his gaze. “They weren’t you.”

His eyes went wide, and for a split second you feared you had made the choice.

But then he was crushing you to his chest, holding you tightly and yet so achingly gently, as if you might shatter in his hands as he pressed his lips to yours.

“I thought I was too late.” He breathed, drawing back just enough to gaze at you.

You shook your head. “I wanted you.”

“Thank fuck-” He closed the gap between you again, kissing you much more firmly this time.

Everything else seemed to fade away, all you could, hear, smell, and feel was Jin. The lingering scent of his cologne, the faint roughness on his hands as they drifted up to cup your cheek.

You hooked your arms around his neck, pulling him and pressing him closer to you.

His hands drifted lower, caressing your waist as his tongue glossed over your lower lip, making you let out a soft whine.

“Is this okay?” He rasped.

“God, yes.” You nodded quickly.

“Jin’s just fine, you don’t have to give me any special names.” He smirked at you.

You shoved him away weakly. “You’re the worst.”

He just laughed, pulling you to connect your lips again.

The sound of voices in the distance suddenly reminded you both that you were still stood on his doorstep.

“Do you wanna take this inside?” He asked “Or am I still the worst?”

“Inside.” You said quickly, giving him another shove, this time propelling you both inside and slamming the door behind you.

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