Kaz X Jesper X Reader That Doesnt Like Being Touched For Long Periods Of Time

Kaz x Jesper x reader that doesn’t like being touched for long periods of time

Baby Steps

kaz x fem!reader x jesper

warnings: touch aversion, comfort?

a/n: i didn’t really know how to put this into a story so i decided to do headcannons, im sorry if this isn’t what you had in mind!

- There would be so much understanding from both of them in my opinion.

- Since Kaz himself has a strong aversion to touch he wouldn’t even be approaching you with touch anyway.

- Kaz would 100% be dumbfounded.

- He’d never encountered someone who shared his condition and he’d silently appreciate the fact that you’d never expect him to work on his aversion in order to be with you. That you’d never pressure him into anything or expect a lot in terms of physical intimacy.

- But you both shared the frustrations.

- When the other person is looking absolutely gorgeous beyond words and all you want to do is hug them, to play with their hair, kiss them etc. Having a hollow feeling inside when Jesper would be so overly affectionate when around everyone else but feel like he had to change how he acted when it came to the two of you.

- You never wanted him to change. Neither did Kaz. As much as he acts as if Jespers over the top self annoyed him, he more so envied him. Jesper never has to worry, he doesn’t need stupid gloves every day to keep him calm. He can drink and eat anything without feeling like the world is crushing down on him.

- He doesn’t look in the mirror and loathe.

- But what he hates most of all is that he can touch you. And Kaz can’t.

- You hadn’t had a traumatic background that had scarred you to the point of aversion and panic attacks.

- At times touch just became too much. Your senses would feel as if they were on fire. Like anything touching you felt as if bugs were crawling all over you. You could handle smaller things in smaller batches.

- It was nowhere near as intense as Kaz but it happened usually during the day. You’d be holding hands with Jesper and you’d suddenly drop his hand and walk with distance between the two of you.

- During the start of your relationship you hadn’t told either of them.

- So imagine Jespers surprise when you swatted his hand away whilst the three of you were in Kaz’s office.

-

“What was that for!” Jesper yelled as he cradled his hand. You frowned, “I didn’t- I didn’t mean to, I’m sorry.” Jesper tilted his head, “Is this for eating your chicken last night? I am sorry you know, but it smelt, amazing.” He dragged out.

“No that’s- you ate my food? I blamed Matthias! Poor guy was as red as the blood on Kaz’s cane.”

Kaz glimpsed down at his cane, he cleaned it everyday, not a speck of blood, poor analogy.

“It’s just, sometimes when I’m being touched, I have to pull away. I don’t know how to explain it but I just, sometimes it’s too much and I can’t handle it. I’m sorry if that disappoints you-”

“Don’t apologise for it. I don’t.”

You smiled gratefully at Kaz as he made eye contact with you. Jesper rested his hand by yours on the desk, “You don’t have to force anything. If you feel like pulling away, pull away. Thank you for telling us, I promise you don’t have to. Not like Kaz makes any effort to touch me, it’s been a long time.”

“Say one more word and I’ll tell her about Milo.”

Jesper gasped as he brought his hand to his heart, “I’m proud of Milo. Whatever makes you think I wouldn’t tell anyone about my baby?”

“Who’s Milo?”

“Milo is Jes’s-”

Jesper shot up from his seat and pointed accusingly at Kaz.

“Don’t you dare!”

-

As frustrating it was for Jesper to have not one, but two partners with aversions he wouldn’t trade it for the world.

He loved you both and you’d work on your barriers together,

Baby Steps.

The crows are highly overprotective of child reader?

Little Crow

platonic crows x child!reader, kaz brekker x child!reader

mentions of y/n, seen as a girl - i made this in the middle of the night man it might not make sense at times - zemeni reader so dark skin, brown eyes and hair etc

It was hard living on the streets of Ketterdam.

No one bothered to look twice at you. Those who did would toss a coin your way and continue on, proud of themselves for helping a child.

Your parents were long gone, having dumped you on the step of an orphanage, two months shy of your first birthday. You were ten now, kicked out of your orphanage for starting fights which usually were just self defence.

There was an underground fighting ring that Ms Andero, the mistress of the Orphanage was more than willing to put you in, for a good price as well as punishment for the ‘trouble’ you caused. You ran away before she had the chance.

Two years on the streets had toughened you up for sure but you would do anything for a hot meal.

That’s why when the Crow Club opened up for a job specialising in information you did everything you could to get it. They were looking for someone female preferably, small and under thirty.

A very odd set of requirements but then again you wouldn’t want someone blowing their hip out after getting caught eavesdropping.

So you did your best to clean up, and you were on your way.

A sweet guy was waiting at the club, with a Zemeni man that looked bored beyond doubt. “Why are we stuck with hiring new recruits? Any of the dregs could’ve done it.”

The smaller boy looked up and smiled, “Because you kept hassling Kaz about getting a cat Jes.” The darker skinned man chuckled, “It was a cute cat, it looked exactly like Kaz. Just more smiley.” The two laughed as you slowly approached, “Who are you?” ‘Jes’ asked. “Uh I heard that there was a job open here?”

“Aren’t you a bit young?” You frowned, feeling rejection coming your way. “I uhm, I just really want a job. I’m fast! I’m super smart, I can jump roofs like realllly far. I can do anything and I’m so small people forget I’m around.”

“What do you think Wylan?”

“I think she’s pretty good for the job, no one would suspect someone so cute and innocent. Men are stupid and never suspect anything besides other men.” A woman spoke up from behind you.

You quickly stepped back, a bit frightened.

“Oh no, I didn’t mean to startle you. I’m Nina. What’s your name?” You meekly smiled, “Uhm Y/n.” “Well Y/n, you are hired.”

The first few days were daunting. You’d never imagined yourself stable nor with your own room. It was small, but you were grateful for anything. What you were yet to do was meet “The Boss” as Jesper liked to say.

But when you did you were met with a harsh, scary contorted version of a smile which made you want to run all the way back up to your room.

“I told you he’d scare her.” Inej whispered to no one in particular. You looked back at Nina but she only egged you on.

You slid into the booth and smiled, placing the parchment in your hands on the table.

“It’s nice to meet you Mr Brekker.”

“You have good information, you never get caught. You’re small and easy to conceal. As long as you don’t cause me or any one else trouble you can stay. Continue to clean up after yourself you are not my responsibility.” He spoke quickly whilst receiving a harsh glare from Inej, Jes and Nina.

“I always clean up after myself, I cook for myself and dress myself I’m completely independent you’ll have no problems from me Mr-”

“Kaz.”

“What?” He looked up from the floor, “You can call me Kaz. Not Mr Brekker, you make me feel twenty years older.”

“Okay. I uhm I found out about a heist and it’s fully planned out. I also may or may not have broken into someone’s office and stolen all of the plans for the heist and its right there.” You said sliding it over to Kaz, “They said it was for someone called Pekky? Pekka?”

Kaz looked at you straight away, “Are you sure? Where was the office?”

“Uhm across the street from that place everyone here hates. Golden Lions.”

Nina leaned in and whispered, “Dime Lions.”

“Dime Lions!”

For a second you swore you saw a smile or a smirk which was more fitting to the ‘Bastard of the Barrel’.

“You might just be a good addition to us, Inej can teach you more. Everyone be here by night, we’ll go over the plan. Be ready. Always be ready.”

Over the next few months you felt content. You were forever grateful you had the bravery (or so you called it) to take the initiative to go for the job in the first place and you ended up with an amazing family. You even managed to break ice with Kaz and he no longer labeled you “child.”

You’d become as great with your skills as Inej from constant training. You’d learnt to pick locks from Kaz, you loved sitting in on Wylan’s terrorism lessons, Jes even let you touch his revolvers after weeks of bugging, Nina taught you about her Grisha powers and different languages and Matthias taught you about Fjerda.

You finally felt confident enough with yourself to go out on a heist with everyone after begging Kaz to let you come. You’d originally wanted to break in and scout the place with Inej but Kaz shot the idea down quickly. It irked you. Did he think you were a liability? Not good enough?

Soon you’d learn it was the opposite.

You had been appointed to the role of lookout. Perched upon a nearby roof with Wylan, Jes would prove as a distraction, Inej would break in at the time and Kaz was inside, scouring the ballroom for a certain George Pell. The second his men approach with the problem of the breach he was to alert Jes, Jes would protect Inej, the two of them would make their escape as Wylan and you would let the bombs go off, giving Kaz his escape with all the other Lords and Ladies.

It was perfect, until it wasn’t.

For starters the security was 3x what had first been reported. Second of all a certain Pekka Rollins was in attendance. Kaz had made the mistake of not looking over the attendance list, mostly because it was an open invitation to the wealthy and no black list was in existence. Third of all, Inej had fallen sick, an infection of a wound.

Which meant you would be taking her place. Kaz had scoured the Dregs for anyone who could take her place but no one could compare to your skills as well as Inej’s.

“When you hear the bombs go off I’ll be at the door, you’ll know who I am because?”

“Secret code.”

“Good. Once you hear it, let me in, and we’ll go out the way we came in. We run back to the rendezvous spot and wait for the place to die down before making our way back. It’s important no one sees your face, this plan relies on anonymity. Pekkas men see us? We’re done for. Understand?”

“Got it Jes.”

“Atta girl.” He laughed as he ruffled your hair.

The two of you were perched on the roof, waiting for Wylans signal that Kaz had made it in. The flashing light had the two of you moving in.

As you lowered yourselves in you heard an explosion which had the two of you drop to the floor. Jes had knocked over a display. Which caused a guard to bang on the door, “Who’s in there?” She asked.

Jesper grabbed your arm as the two of you hid behind the door, as she entered Jesper shot her point blank. As you looked towards the necklace you were meant to grab.

Jesper dragged her body to the side and looked out the door before closing it. “We need to hurry this up, I don’t like this night. This mission seems off.” You nodded as you picked the lock to the cabinet. The glass seemed to be Durast made, trying to shatter the glass and attract more attention seemed stupid and you were sure the glass would be hard to break.

You heard a pop and you carefully opened the cabinet to extract the necklace. The best way to steal something in your mind was to act as if you already owned it. Before putting it on you hastily grabbed a nearby gown and put it on, to play the part of course. Not because it was absolutely breathtaking. You quickly clipped the necklace on and asked Jesper if he could change it somehow in size or colour.

“I- what? I can’t I’m not-”

“Jesper don’t act dumb. I’m ten not stupid.”

He laughed, not as big and sweet as usual but still. “Why do you hide it?” “I, I don’t know. I just feel people would treat me differently.” You hugged him as he stumbled back. “I love you no matter what Jes. If anyone says anything I’ll stab them.”

He smiled as he wrapped his arms around you, “That’s good to know, no one will come after me if I have a big scary protector.” You withdrew, with a faked look of shock, “I’m not scary!”

“I detest. You scare me every day. With your little knives and intelligent self you put us all to shame.” As you were about to respond you heard shouts and screams, indicating it was your time to go. As the two of you returned to the skylight you came down from you saw three men inspecting the rope you used to repel downwards. “There! Bloody criminals!”

The two of you ran towards the open doors, to be met with guards rushing at you from both ways. “Shit, what now?” You spied a door in-front and grabbed his hand as you rushed towards it.

You were met with a stampede of people trying to exit the buildings. You both ran into the crowds, hoping to blend in, which you did successfully. As you rushed out your dress got caught on something. By the time you freed yourself the ballroom was empty and Jesper was nowhere in sight.

You were captured within seconds, and you decided to not fight until you were locked up or alone. It would give you time to put your thoughts together, but you didn’t get the chance since you were promptly knocked out with a punch to the face.

You woke up in a bedroom, shackled to the bed. Your dress and hair was the same and thankfully the necklace was still on. The distorted shape hid its real size and original self. You looked around and realised it was still nighttime. But you couldn’t tell if it was the same day or not. As you inspected the shackle you realised the lock was simple. One of the many locks Kaz had you practice with.

You took the lock pick you kept in your boot out and began. Under a minute the lock was off, Kaz would be proud, or happy or whatever emotions he can feel. You thought.

You looked around the room and notice a small window, higher up, letting the moonlight bleed into the room. There was a bucket on the side, next to the door and you shuddered to think of what it was used or intended for. You were hot, the room was small and cramped, much more so than your room at the Slat. You quickly undressed, much more comfortable in your normal shirt, vest and pants. You tied your hair up and slipped the necklace into a hidden pocket. Before making your way to the bucket, placing it on the bed and hoisting your self up to the window.

You weren’t high up, one storey it seemed and you could make the jump most likely but you didn’t want to leave anything up to chance. You used the sewer pipe and uneven bricks to climb down into the alley. You ducked behind a bunch of crates as you noticed a guard walking past. Once he was gone you ran.

As fast as possible, you made your way down the surprisingly empty streets. Richer homes, light lamps still on, cafés with an abundance of flowers out front.

You were in a nicer area obviously.

After running for what felt like forever before you entered familiar waters. As the Crow Club came into view you ran faster than before, your legs ached but you were so close. You weren’t going to stop until you knew you were safe.

You barrelled through the doors and ended up on the floor as you heard people make their way over to you.

“Saints Y/n you scared us to death. We thought they got you.” Inej said as she hugged you tightly. You scoffed, “Please I’m the fastest person in the Barrel, you honestly thought their fat asses would get me?” She smiled as someone spoke up.

“Well they obviously did. Look at you.”

Kaz spoke as he rose from the booth, leaning heavily on his cane. “All the Dregs are looking for you. I’m so sorry Y/n/n I should’ve kept you in front of me. Look what they did to you.” Jesper frowned as he took your hands, getting you up from the floor.

“It’s okay I’m okay.”

“Both of you, go grab Nina from the Slat.”

“But-”

“Now.” The two looked at each other, Jesper shrugged as Inej sighed, she knew better than to press Kaz, especially when he was in a bad mood.

“I knew you weren’t ready.” He said as he approached you. “Hey, I am ready. Everyone makes mistakes Kaz. Nothing goes exactly to plan, otherwise there wouldn’t have been a plan B, or C or-”

“You could’ve been seriously hurt, or injured. I don’t need a liability on the team, someone I have to constantly worry about.”

“Aw, you worry about me?”

“That’s not what I mean.”

“Sure sure Kazzle. As much as you hate to admit you have a soft spot for me. I’m not a liability and you know it. I can handle my own, I just need more training. Plus the plan was already awry before I got nabbed. Wylan already had bombs going off the second Jes and I were inside.”

“He was ambushed. The light wasn’t mean to go off, you were meant to wait until all the guards were drawn away, busy directing the guests inside. Then you were supposed to go in, come out the same way. If George was alerted I’d let Wylan know and Wylan would draw their attention with the bombs. He was fighting someone off and turned the lantern on accidentally. The bomb as well.”

“See? We’re only human.”

“It was a stupid plan, not only did we all blow our covers but Pekka saw me. Now the Stadwatch will come around with accusations but nothing solid. You were taken for hours, beaten and on top of it all we didn’t get what we wanted.” Kaz spoke as he turned and made his way up the stairs as you followed.

“Oh didn’t we?” He was about to open his room when he turned sharply. “Y/n.” You giggled before taking the necklace out, “I know it looks a little funny but it’ll be back to normal once Jes gets his hands on it.” A slight smile tugged at his lips, “Impressive.”

“Ah! That was a compliment. I think I may die of shock Kazzle.”

He shook his head and you knew he was smiling. You sat on his bed as you admired the room, you’d never been in here before and it was pretty standard but what shocked you was his taste in books, poetry?

Kaz Brekker reciting poetry seemed like a funny dream.

He slowly made his way back to you, with a damp cloth and bowl of water. His breath wavered, “Sit on the chair, stay still.” You complied and sat idly, a book in your lap. He slowly brang the cloth to your lip, wiping the blood away.

After a few minutes he withdrew quickly. You looked in the mirror and smiled again, Kaz Brekker had a soft spot for a street kid, who would’ve thought?

Whilst he sat going through his own work you sat going through his books. By the time you finished your books the day had seeped through the window as you felt your eyes grow tired and before you knew it you were asleep.

You woke up to the nice smell of waffles and syrup. As you got up you realised you weren’t in your own bed, no you were still in Kaz’s room. To your right on the table was a tray of food.

“Eat.” And you didn’t need to be told twice, after eating your own food and returning it to the kitchen you sat at one of the chairs in front of him. “Have you eaten?” Kaz didn’t respond, “Did you sleep?”

“You were in my bed how could I have slept?” You tilted your head, “I was on a very comfortable chair. Not the bed.” He looked up slightly, “Your neck was in an odd position so I moved you.” You smiled, “Thank you.” His eyebrows contorted, “For?”

“Everything. You could’ve kicked me out on the street when I showed for the job. When I messed up in cooking you didn’t shout, when I was training you didn’t get fed up when I failed. You had patience when it came to me. Most people would’ve thrown me out by then. You took a chance on me. On my first job I messed up and you still kept me. Thank you Kaz.” Kaz stood from his chair and so did you.

He looked down at you, “I was a child, on the streets like you. I did not meet the right people. No one took me in. I was alone. You showed potential the moment I talked to you first, I wasn’t going to let the same thing happen to someone I’ve come to, value.”

“I’m assuming that’s your way of saying I love you and I love you too Kazzle.” Before you knew it you hugged him. You immediately tried to pull back but an uncertain gloved hair rested on your head, shaky and ghosting but there.

“I love you too.” He wanted to say, but he couldn’t.

And if he couldn’t say it? He’d show it. He protect you from the horrors the barrel had to offer. The crooked people and places.

He’d keep you safe.

Because of Jordie.

No, because he loved you.

targaryenluv's bridgerton masterlist

gotta love bridgerton, the books so far are sooo good. but i hate colin rn so i wonder how s3 will go 👀

ANTHONY BRIDGERTON

— coming soon <3

BENEDICT BRIDGERTON

— treat her right

summary: benedict has loved you for so long, but he always assumed you’d want anthony and he wanted you. but when the opportunity presents itself to be with you he dives headfirst.

COLIN BRIDGERTON

— coming soon!

SIMON BASSET

— infatuation, infatuation ii

summary: the one where you somehow travelled into your favourite tv show along with your family. and as you debut in society, you catch the eye of a certain duke.

In a dark and rainy night, reader and jesper spend time cuddling in bed until next morning. anything for this man because he seems to give the best cuddles 🫣

Stormy Days and Warm Beds

jesper fahey x fem!reader

warnings: none really, bed invasion courtesy of reader, cuddles n kisses?? (hope you like it 🤭) pillow fights, this is so fluffy i love it

You and Jesper had been together for only a few months. You’d been careful at the start since you knew Jesper and his uh, extracurricular activities were a known fact. He was a gorgeous, flirt sharpshooter how could he not be having fun?

You didn’t want to get your hopes up since you knew how your friend was.

But overtime his flirty side seemed to only be on around you, his smile always beamed when directed at you, he’d straighten in his chair when you entered the room and you’d once caught him whining about you being sick since he wanted to take you out to dinner.

You knew he was only yours.

And the two of you were like koalas, always clinging onto each other as if the other was a tree. You’d play with rings in order to calm yourself down sometimes, Jes would play with your hair on the regular, you’d read to him but he’d never pay attention when he was feeling extra affectionate.

Kaz even had to alter the boarding at the Slat since the two of you (Jesper begging him in his office when he had the time) always whined about being so far apart.

So when the two of you were apart, it was dreadful.

Like now, Jesper was currently out scouting with Inej and they had been for over two days. Trying to draw up a definitive schedule of a certain Museum owners daily life. They were far from the Barrel on the opposite side of Ketterdam, night and day, meaning they hadn’t come back at all.

And it was so hard to not try and run over. But Kaz explained, (multiple times since you wouldn’t take no for an answer) too many people would draw attention and you would distract Jesper vice versa.

So you settled for the next best thing, his room.

The bed was warm for some reason, the reason being Jesper had convinced Nina to swap roles with him so he could come home under the false pretence of him being ‘Too beautiful to camp out in such a dump.’

He didn’t want to disturb you so he figured he’d see you in the morning but before he could sleep his hunger became evident, so he’d gone for food downstairs.

The pillow smelt so much like him it was crazy. You’d figured it would have faded a little by now but it was so strong you were bewildered but also absolutely knackered so you ignored it, until-

“Oh. Hello random woman in my bed.” He grinned as he crossed his arms and leaned against the wall. (iykyk)

“Jesper Fahey I am not a random woman.”

“Samantha is that you?” Jesper joked as he approached your side of the bed as you got up and smacked him on the side with his pillow, but he quickly managed to grab it from you and throw it to the side as he took off his boots and jumped beside you eliciting a large groan from the bed underneath.

“Careful you’ll break the frame.”

“Oh no, have I seriously put on that much weight in two days? Must be all the cake.” He fake panicked whilst touching his stomach.

“Oh yeah, you’re unrecognisable.” You laughed as you laid your head on his chest whilst he brung the duvet over the two of you.

“Saints seems like I’ll have to work twice as hard to keep you in my arms love. Might as well lock you in now.” He said as his arms cages you in, then promptly attacking your side.

“Stop! Stop! I’m already here! I’m not going an-anywhere.” You cried out as you tried to wriggle out and away. He stopped and smiled proudly, “That easy huh? What do I have to do to get you out of your-”

“Jesper!”

He laughed again and you settled your arm on his chest and looked up at him as he looked down, “You take my breath away. Every time I look at you Y/n.”

You grinned, “Star struck are we?”

“Oh everyday.”

The two of you giggled and fought and kissed until the sun came up. You wouldn’t change anything about him, and he would.

Your last name perhaps?

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Over you’re post about the crows x child!reader. And I was thinking of the same for a while! But I wanted to ask you about the crows with a moody teen. Like she’s maybe grown up, she’s like still bad ass but she’s going through teen age eyes. Like maybe like 13-14. Sorry, I just think it would be so funny like the guardians of the galaxy and teen age groot. She can have like a attitude problem with kaz.

Teenage Scare

six of crows x teen!reader, kaz brekker x teen!reader

Mean.

That’s how most people would describe you.

No matter what a discussion was about you always had something to say. When you were younger you were new to the Crow Club. Despite your rough life you were kind and sweet.

That part of you was snacking on waffles deep inside, because with your teenage years came change. And you didn’t like change. First came with your height, you were still short for your age but you could see you were growing faster than usual. Then came your face, where it was usually smooth came bumps and rough patches, not noticeable but to you? This was an attack on your face.

Then your chest, which was the worst. From 12 to 14 it grew and grew and you had no clue if it would stop. You’d caught the eye of local boys when you didn’t want to. Which lead to a few catcalls to you, and a few broken noses for them. You didn’t want to be treated differently for something so vain, so natural.

But it would happen either way, not only did boys notice but men did too. Although they always bit their tongue since the first (and last) man to say something ended up with all his money fit snuggly in your pockets and his teeth in a bin.

It made you angry and bitter.

You had to get new clothes every few months since it didn’t fit here or there and so on. After a big job the Crows had pulled off which you played a huge role in you were definitely more than able to afford it but you didn’t want to waste all your money on clothes.

So you took up sewing in secret.

You didn’t feel like being bullied for doing something so girlish whilst you condemned the Ladies of richer houses for being shackled to a birthing bed or cooking and cleaning.

But the thing was you liked it. It brung a sense of calm, using different colours of thread and different needles giving various outcomes. And there was nothing you could make that had been made before. There was so much freedom when it came to it.

Everyone else noticed the calm of the storm that was you, pretty quickly.

“What on Ketterdam just happened.” Wylan said to Jesper as he sat down with his breakfast. “What do you mean?” He looked up at him and cleared his throat, “I’m sorry I should’ve been clearer.” Jesper laughed, “What did I say about apologising for how you speak?” Jesper smiled timidly, “Not to. I remember, just a slip. It’s just, when I went into the Kitchen, Y/n was in there.”

Jesper tilted his head, encouraging him to continue, “Cooking. She hasn’t cooked since she was twelve.” Jesper brung his hand to his forehead and faked shock, “Oh my Saints, the world is off its axis.”

Wylan smacked his chest and frowned, “It’s not funny! She hasn’t cooked in so long, she says it’s boring and we have people for it so what’s the point?” Jesper wraps his arm around him, “I’m sorry love, you’re right it is odd. But maybe the beast is about to go into a deep slumber and we get the normal Y/n back. You know how the younger teenage years are.”

“We’re all in our 20s, we may not fully remember but it was awkward and weird. Everything was changing and we were adapting. Let her adapt.” He finished as Wylan nodded in agreement, what he didn’t notice was Jespers hand sneaking towards his toast.

“Hey! Drop it!” Wylan shouted as Jesper took a big bite out of the corner, “You love me, let me eat.” Wylan huffed in annoyance before getting up to leave but Jesper promptly wrapped his arm around his waist and brought him back down, “Oh no you don’t.” Jesper laughed as Wylan did too.

“Please stop giggling like school girls, you’re making me want to vomit.” Y/n said as she sat down with her food in front of them. “Don’t make any sudden movements, we don’t want to scare the animal.” Jesper ‘whispered’ as Y/n laughed sarcastically, “For a second I was wondering why I never sit with you two in the mornings anymore, now I remember why.”

“Oh it was just a joke Y/n, please sit, I feel like I never see you anymore.” Wylan spoke as he took a sip of his juice. “Maybe open your eyes up babe, I live with you.” Wylan smiled, “Yeah but I uhm, I missed talking to you.”

“Thanks. I’d miss me too.”

Jesper snickered as Wylan hit him again.

That was one of the moments you realised how much you’d changed. Whilst fearing over things being different you’d pushed away the Crows, your family. You’d begun spending more time in your room, or with other friends your age and while having friends your age was okay, you spent more time with them than at the Slat or Crow Club.

You’d let your fear take over. Not wanting to eat with them in the mornings to hear their questions and teasings of, “Are you okay?” “Is it that time of the month?” “New clothes?”

What you’d seen as annoying were actually just genuine questions of concern. From that day on you’d ease back into your life. Eating with them in the mornings, actually attending meetings rather than hearing the summary from Inej.

You’d go shopping with Nina for food, or have your daily reading sessions in Kaz’s office. You’d shop for hats and ingredients with Wylan and Jesper and laugh when Jesper touched the wrong thing and would get told off.

You’d be home again.

The meeting was at seven pm and this time you planned on showing up.

You were there twenty minutes early, grabbing your favourite book of tales you’d obtained from East Ravka. “You’re here for once?” Kaz asked as he walked into the room. You nodded, the realisation that you hadn’t talked to him in weeks.

Kaz noticed your change first. No longer did he receive sweet notes in the morning that had him smiling at himself, no longer did he hear your humming as you read in his office, something he claimed to loathe but he’d grown familiar to the sound, like a white noise.

When he worked to hard he’d always be so engrossed in whatever he was doing he’d sometimes not notice you bringing him dinner, lunch or breakfast.

Before every meeting you’d be the first to come along, not for the sake of punctuality, but so Kaz could silently hand over his plan, and have you fix anything that seemed out of place.

Once you’d become a teenager, you grew distant and indifferent to Kaz most of all. You didn’t want him to see you as an adult. Someone he could treat the same as others he worked with. You liked how it was, him always asking you if you’d slept, him telling you off when you became cheeky, when you ate like a girl starved. (Which you never were), when he’d let you, little by little break away his barriers.

With a pat on the back, a comment of praise, a loving look etc. What you both missed most of all was your night talks. Where you’d talk about anyone or thing. Nothing was off limits, it was in these talks that you found out about Kaz’s past.

His change of scenery from his fathers farm to the bustling streets of Ketterdam, the con played by one Jakob Hertzoon on two unknowing boys. How they were cheated out of their inheritance, Jordie’s death and the eventual reasoning behind Kaz and his fear of touch.

You vowed with him to bring Pekka down.

The words which he uttered, ‘Brick by Brick’ held new meaning in your eyes. And you and Kaz held them dear, you would do anything to bring the ‘King’ of the Barrel to his knees.

After such a monumental breakthrough, even if Kaz wouldn’t admit it, you drifted and it stung.

“Early as always.”

“What else do you expect from me?”

“For you to run away, play with your little friends rather than do your job.”

You lifted your head from your book, “I know I’ve been gone a bit, but I always get the job done. I’m always there.”

“I know you are. But as a Crow you’re supposed to be at every meeting, every briefing. Just because you’re a child it does not give you a free pass to skip out on anything.”

“I’m not a child.”

“No? You run away from your responsibilities, the plan is as important as the mission. You should know the ins and outs, the layout of the area rather than running around aimlessly before finally finding a window to go through.”

“That’s was one time!”

“It’s not good enough. You’re not good enough.”

You slammed the book down on the table and rose from your seat, “I’m sorry if I’m not fucking perfect Kaz. But I’m human. We all make mistakes and you know that. There’s a reason you always make me go over every plan. You’re not subtle, having Inej bring me plans as ‘potential opportunities’ and asking for my opinion. I know she relays all the information to you. I’m fourteen not stupid.”

“It’s been a while since I heard that phrase.”

“Oh fuck you.”

“Y/n.”

You stopped in your tracks, you knew that tone, you’d heard it on countless heists and with it you knew not to mess around. You turned slowly and crossed your arms, “What?”

“Brick by Brick.”

You sighed, the words had been lost to you, having not said them in forever.

“Brick by Brick.”

“Those words are close to me. I do not take them lightly, they’re a promise, it will happen. Don’t make me regret telling you of my past if you’re slacking. If you’re slipping, if you can’t handle yourself you can’t handle this life. If you’d rather be an ordinary girl I can organise a wealthy family to adopt you. It wouldn’t be hard, you’re well educated, mannered even if you’ve shown a lack of them in the past few years. But if you want to continue, continue with the Crows then let me know right now. I cannot have someone lacking in focus and effort because they’re moping about change.”

“I want to be here, I do. And the phrase, means a lot to you I know. I know how hard it was for you to share your past with me and i’m grateful you did. It showed me so much more to you. You built all of this from the ground and as much as you’d never admit it, it means a lot to you. The Crows do. I’d never want to jeopardise all you’ve done. I’m sorry for how I’ve been acting and I promise to get my act together. I don’t remember much from my years before here. And I don’t want to. This is my life, I was made for this.”

“That’s the Y/n I know. Now, go over the plan before everyone arrives.”

You sat back down, “Brick by Brick.”

You looked up and grinned, “Brick by Brick.”