The Mercs Going On A Road Trip?

The mercs going on a road trip? 👀

Arguing over who gets the front seat: Heavy and scout. Heavy needs his space, Scout is childish and wants to be in the front, and Sniper is just standing there like “I’d also like the front seat please my legs dont fit” but nobody listens because he’s Sniper. Eventually the two compromise and Scout ends up in Heavy’s lap. 

Keep Scout occupied, otherwise he’ll start screaming wheels on the bus to annoy the others for the entire. ride. (Or at least until someone tapes his mouth shut, a common occurrence.)

Alternates include: Beer on the wall, tongue twisters, what’s new pussycat...

Crammed into the middle: Demoman, Pyro, Soldier. Pyro is in the very middle and is restless, eventually they fill up the other’s laps with toys and crayon drawings. Soldier is just happy his hand isn’t being cut off at the moment, and Demoman doesn’t mind as long as he has a bottle of scrumpy for the long ride ahead. 

Designated driver: Also Sniper, or Engineer (and on rare occasions miss Pauling herself). Engie can stand being in the back seat for long enough to brave the ride, but he’s still backseat driving from there, calling out directions and making sure nobody does anything dumb to get them pulled over.

Crammed into the back: Medic and Spy. Spy would rather not disclose what he saw during the road trip, but it’s safe to say there was a lot of suspicious, muffled yelling from the body bags he just had to bring along.

For that merc roadtrip post, I see Scoatcand Demo as the ones asking to stop every 20 min. Granted Demo almost has an excuse

Hah, certainly agree with that headcanon! Engineer ends up screaming out of frustration half way through because multiple times they both stopped them just to say they were kidding. 

Fanart of a beautiful moment :)

(did the mercs ever change appearance save for the splits? if so i can fiX IT i just wasn’t sure)

@talk-to-the-mercs​ has a rlly good story goin on! Might put some posts I make here into context bc i reference it sometimes-

YOOOOO SNIPER welcome back mate! it's been a while, innit? we all missed you something terrible! how're you feeling?

Sniper: [giggling]

Engineer: Whatcha laughin’ about, Snipes?

Sniper: [laughing] Batman.

Engineer: That anesthetic is really hittin’ ya hard, huh?

Sniper: Nah, barely scratched me...I gave ‘im the ol’ one two...

Engineer: When’s this stuff gonna wear off?

Medic: A few hours to a day, depending on zhe pain and functionality of the heart.

Scout: Maybe we can tote him around like on Weekend at Bernie’s.

Demo: People’d talk. Besides, he doesn’t look dead, just drunk. Drunk out of his skull, sure, but still alive.

Scout: Eh, he looks more stoned. Actin’ stoned, too. Yo, Sniper, what’s two plus two?

Sniper: Water.

Scout: [snickering] Yeah, friggin’ high as a kite.

Engineer: Don’t mess with him, Scout, he’s been through enough.

Heavy: Heavy missed you, Sniper.

Sniper: [mumbling] A’course you missed me. I’m the best bloody shot this side of down under...

[END OF TRANSMISSION]

OKAY, so I was a bit antsy about posting this but hopefully I got the tw tags right? If there’s anything else I need to / can do to prevent this from reaching people sensitive to blood or gore let me know!!

It’s just a bit of medic fanart, but I’m still getting used to this site so I don’t know how much forewarning is needed.

Oh btw! Someone sent in an ask so hopefully I’ll have some headcanons out soon. Heads up though, school is on weekdays obv and that’s when I usually write chapters for tens a crowd, so I don’t know if posts will be as common during those times!

Headcanon request rules!

NO

NSFW

Kinks

OCs (unless u guys maybe want a bit of edith? But otherwise i don’t know enough about ya’lls characters to write much, and I don’t want to alienate anyone else looking for content)

Abusive characters

Suicide/suicidal thoughts ( this also includes implied, such as giving a character a gun to do the deed. )

Self harm

Yandere

Maskless pyro

Major character death

Please keep this in mind, i’m sorry ;;

CAN DO

Any gender of reader (nb inclusive) : If no gender is specified, it will be automatically gender neutral.

All mercs at once, but the more mercs you add to the list, the less likely I am to write headcanons as it is a lot of work.

Groups of classes such as support, defense, etc.

S/O headcanons (Love these!!)

General headcanons (What would happen if x thing happened to x mercs?)

SFW rarepairs / ship headcanons! (ex. Engiespy hcs)

Basically anything is fair game, just don’t make it weird or sexual ykno? Or NO if it’s on the no list, duh. Yeah. I’m a bit squeamish at times.

VERY VERY VERY light suggestive content, keep it pg-13 folks! Ex. joking but not outright doing something related to NSFW.

EXTRA NOTES:

I can (and will) turn off anon if ya’ll don’t behave. be civil!

Requests are generally always open, but keep in mind I MAY NOT FILL YOURS. Because they’re just that. requests. I’ll do my best to keep up with them though!

It really just depends on how I’m feeling at the time, or how much work I have to do. please don’t be mad if I ignore your request! It’s not personal @ all. ;;

Makin my way downtown

You know what time it is.