A Message From The Doctor.

A message from The Doctor.

Yes! Hello. Is this thing on? Y/n are you there? Hold on a sec just let me...

Ahh! There we go all better. Now. I heard from a little bird that you weren't feeling well. Well by a little bird I mean the Tardis. Not much of a bird. Unless you count all the flying. Well.

Nevermind. What matters right now is you.

I know that I haven't been there as much as I should have. Didn't notice the way you have begun to shut yourself off from everyone else.

Now I know that that is a tempting thing to do. To pretend that the world isn't here to judge you. For people to ask you if your okay all the time and not wanting to hear the real answer.

The want to be alone.

But I'm also here to tell you that isn't a way to live.

It's. *Static*

Oh yes. Sorry bout that. Now where were we. Ah.

Y/n you have so many people that care. You humans. Always surprise me with that. The way you give your heart out so freely. The way you love so much it kills you when that love leaves.

I'm telling you that there is a light at the end of the tunnel. Hope when all seems lost. There is family. Friends. Even your pet. You are loved and you will be missed.

And most of all.

*The line falls silent. The humming of the Tardis is heard along with the shuffling of fabric*

*A throat is cleared*

And most of all. I wouldn't have you.

My brilliant companion.

My absolutely stunning human that loves with no bounds.

Where would I be without you.

My darling y/n.

Your smile could put the stars to shame. Your laugh the sound space.

Don't laugh now. You truly haven't heard music until you've listened to the song of lost time.

Y/n.

My companion.

My friend.

Please. Do not go.

I would be lost without you.

Now.

Look out your window.

*The screen statics and fades to black."

(Is this something anyone would like? I really don't know. But what I do know is that sometimes every one needs to hear something from someone they care about. I know that the Doctor means a lot to some people. Myself included. Just. Let me know if any of you would like more of these. I can set up rules for it as well. I just hope that this makes someone happy. And I'm sorry about the length.Its a little short.)

A message from The tenth Doctor.

*Static rings through. Shuffling and muttering is heard through the noise.*

Testing testing. Ah! Yes! There we go.

*The screen flickers and slowly comes to with color. A man moves inside of the little screen. Wiggling his fingers as he waits for it to clear up.*

Y/n, can you hear me? It's a little difficult to get a signal right now.

Hang on.

*A high pitched whirring is heard as the screen comes to life in a burst of colors.*

There. Much better. Now. How are you? I know it's been a while since we've seen each other. Time travel and all.

Can't sleep? Well that's not good. Why not?

Oh. Oh. Ya. I get it. Sometimes it's hard to settle down when your mind won't stop yelling.

Why am I not. Hey now don't try to change the subject. I'm fine.

I always am.

Now. What do we need to do to get you to sleep?

Don't give me that look. You humans need more sleep than Time Lord's do. Now.

I can see you all bundled up. Are you warm enough?

Okay. Have you eaten? Drank enough water?

Yes. Okay then.

*He's tossing a ball between his hands. Feet propped up on the Tardis console.*

Oh!

*He shoots up and flicks a few switches. The screen darkens and your room is flooded in a soft white light. Stars and planets dance along your walls. A galaxy places itself on your roof.*

I know that I can't be there right now. And I'm sorry. I know that I promised to be there for you.

What?

I am.. Y/n. I.

Hmm. I suppose.

Ahh look at you. *Mutters*

I wanted to take you there. You see that planet? The one with the golden rings and sapphire moons?

*He sits and tilts back in the worn chair. Long finger pointing to some far off projection.*

One of the most gorgeous planets I have ever seen. Fields of soft amber grass. The sky the color of rust and clouds of silver.

The mountains oh those mountains. Towering high above. They were so tall they brushed the tip of the atmosphere. Coated in fine crystals and shone with the intensity of a thousand sun's.

You would have loved it y/n. I want to take your there some day. When you feel better. That I can promise you.

That you will get better.

That sleep will come as easily as-

*He stops then smiles.*

Maybe that's what we should do y/n. Tell you a story to forget about everything.

Look at you.

*He leans forward elbows resting on his knees.*

My brave friend.

You're strong. Don't forget that.

Don't be afraid to ask for help.

A piece of me. A part of you.

Pairing: The Doctor x reader

Reader type: Gender neutral

Song: Roslyn- Bon Iver

Warnings: N/A

An: It has been a hot minute lol. I'm thinking about doing a mini series of various one shots with a specific type of reader in mind. This is mostly just a quick idea of sorts to figure it out. I'll be tagging all of these ones, if I do it, as readerreader until I figure out a better name lol. Anyways enjoy this one! Any feedback is welcome!

"Just because you are soft doesn't mean you are not a force. Honey and wildfire are both the color gold."

- Victoria Erickson, Edge of Wonder: Notes from the Wildness of Being (via woodlandfawn)

"Are you mad at me?" You asked. Your voice wavered. Spoke the pain you felt.

"Mad?" The Doctor asked softly. Held you closer in his arms. "Why would I be?" He trailed off. Pulled your hand into his. "Y/n." A whisper. Your name is uttered in such soft reverence.

"Please Doctor." You sounded meek. Tired. God so tired. "Tell me." You look up. Your damp cheek still pressed to his chest. "Please."

He brought your hand to his lips. Layed a kiss on broken and bloody knuckles. His jaw clenched. His eyes soft as he looked at you. "Never. Not of this."

.

.

.

He held a lifetime of sorrow. Carried it in a body hewn of ancient stone. Drowned in a pain beyond your comprehension. The Doctor has faced beings claiming God has spoken to death and was spared her hallowed curse. Yet he came out the victor. The lone man in a blue box condemned to live out a life loss and ruin.

There are times you catch a glimpse of him. Genuine moments of his joy. Of his love for learning. Such as now. On a cool, crisp day. Breathing in the mountain air of a foreign planet. He speaks to you, almost tripping over his own tongue as he tells you of the planets history. Its people. He tells you of events as if he has lived them. And perhaps he did. Watched as the first mountains formed.

Did he hold his breath as the first green sprout rose from rich soil? Did he know of that tree? Breathed in the air it gave as it towered miles high into the air? The crown of it touching the clouds. Daring to break the atmosphere and touch the stars just as he did.

You say nothing. Hold his hand while he speaks. You look into eyes that have seen both the birth and death of the universe.

If you listen. Catch your breath. You can hear the TARDIS. The cry of alien animals. Although the Doctor would tell you that "You are just as alien to them as they are to you." You smile at the memory that thought brings up. On a far warmer planet that had a sky of deep violet hues.

Your face warms when the Doctor waves a hand in front of you.

"Are you even listening? I am being very clever you know." You chuckle. Slightly embarrassed at being caught lost in your thoughts.

"I am. I promise. I just." You pause. Get lost in the look he gave you. One brow rose and a flicker of a smile on his lips before he looks away.

You would give anything to see yourself through his eyes. To see what he saw in you. To know what he deemed worthy enough to keep you around.

"Come along then." The Doctor pulled you towards a worn foot path. "There's a town nearby that I want to show you. It has the nicest little shops." Slowly he fades out. Eyes following the curve of your profile. Lost in the look of your eyes. A fresh view in the planet he often visited.

Yet you were the first companion he brought here. The first to view this small piece of peace he so desperately clung to. And he showed you as if to say. Here I am layed bare, open. See the part of me that I keep hidden. Please notice the peace. The untainted memory he so desperately held onto.

His own lips copy the curve of your smile. Finding his own happiness at your joy of another alien world. Caught in new sights and smells. He watches as you call out. Greet people unknown to you.

You have grown since you've first met. No longer cold and calloused to the world. Finding your own softness after being walled off for so long.

You nod as you pass yet another. The people of this planet range in brillent hues of blue. Each of them shifting darker in shade as they age. Their "hair" was a tuble like tendrel that they held great care for. They decorated them with jewels and golden clasps. Horns sprouted from the tops of their heads. Curling like a rambs as they grew older. From this was draped a sheer fabric. A religious practice for some. They have four arms. The bottom set wrapped around their torso when not in use.

You nod your head at a passing couple clothed in deep green hues. A child between them skin such a pale blue it was almost white. Your head nods. Eyes closed. The Doctor copied you from by your side.

A polite greeting that they copy in turn. They tell you of festivities being held in town. An important one for them. Something only held every one hundred years.

These people live for centuries. A long life of peace and deep appreciation of the arts and sciences. They yearn and crave knowledge.

The Doctor grins. Laughs and waves goodbye at the family and pulls you further down the path. Through fog covered trees and over a stone bridge. His hand still in yours as you reach the town.

And oh it was stunning. Filled with the laughter of children and foreign food wafting in the air. Sweet and aromatic. Spice intermingling with the pine like scent of the woods.

What you could only call orbs floated high into the hair. Multi colored balls all shades of the rainbow

Children ran past you. The Doctors hand slipping from your own. His gaze follows the children running towards the bridge you just crossed. Their laughter rung. High and bright.

With a hand between your shoulders the Doctor leads you towards various stalls. Having you try different foods. Drinks. Even getting you a trinket or two. Silver bangles on your wrists. A new ear cuff shaped like a dragon from Earth's folk tales. Takes that held some tune of truth to them.

The day blends into the night. Your full. Body satisfied by a different blend of food. Even so you held a warm drink in your hand. The Doctor had lead you to a high hillside above the town. The two of you sat on dewy grass beneath twin moons.

You shivered. Wishing you had brought a warmer jacket. You took a sip of your drink. Sweet and almost chocolaty. It was caffeinated almost like a coffee. You bumped your shoulder against the Doctor who in turn nudged you back. "Why did we come up here again?" You asked. The Doctor smiles.

"They hold a light show. Drape thier bodies in the floating lights you've seen all night. " His voice is soft. Far off in a memory. One you're soon about to make. "They dance. Tell the story of their people. It's a long one. Sad and filled with pain and trauma. But they tell it. Teach their young about their history and just how difficult peace was to achieve." He begins to add more but stops when the dancing begins.

Light waves. Rolls across the town like water on the ocean. Breaking and scattering when it hits the edge of their home.

They dance and sing. So much pain and sorrow held in their story. It calls out to you. Transfixes you. It also speaks of hope. Of faith.

The Doctor says nothing. Watches you as you watch the town. Colors dance across you skin. Flash in your bright eyes. You face is soft. Small minute expressions only he could see. He has seen this a thousand times and will a thousand more. But he thinks. Just this time. He is seeing it for the first time again through you. And it stills his hearts. Warms his chest.

He sees a part of himself in you. A desperate need to learn. To see. And he knows you see yourself in him to. The hurting. The pain. The coldness. Often he wonders how the both of you got along. How the both of you balance each other out.

You got to grow softer. Learn to give a kindest you so desperately fought for. Learn to give it to others so that you to may get it.

The Doctor got to see things in fresh eyes. To relearn the reason why he ran off in that blue box in the first place. He saw a piece of himself in you. And perhaps you part of himself in you.

Eater Of Time

Pairing: Eleventh Doctor x Gender Neutral Reader

Song: Babylon- Barns Courtney. Darkness of the Day- Cadalay

Warnings:

An: This is something that I plan on re-writing in the future. Maybe even making it into a short story. But it's an idea i've been toying with for a long time now so please consider this as a first draft of sorts. Any feedback will be appreciated.

Tags: @simplymurdock

Word count:4586

Last part first

"Help me. Remind me why I'm here."

-Kim Addonizio, from 'Death Poem', Wild Nights: New and Selected Poems.

"What are they?" Your voice shakes. The creatures in front of you move and shift along the shadows. Their eyes are hungry. Feeding off of the very being of you.

"Eaters of time." The Doctor spoke from beside you. Quiet. Soft. Almost scared if one could believe it. You glance up at him as he still stares back at the creatures.

"Eaters of time?" You ask. One of them lurches forward and the Doctor places you behind him. His sonic whirs uselessly against them. The darkness they spread swallows the little green light. "Doctor." You whisper. "Doctor please. What are they?"

You have never seen that look on his face before. So broken. Empty. You've seen his joy, his anger, his sorrow. This. It.

"They eat time, Y/n. Specifically the time someone has lived. They eat it. Consume it. Almost immortal because of their hunger." He pulls you away from him and towards the open forest the two of you had trekked god knows how long ago. "I'm sorry." He gives you a hug. Presses a kiss to your brow. "I am so sorry. But I need you to run. Go. To the Tardis. She'll take you home."

"I'm not leaving you!" The creatures surge as your voices rises. "Doctor. I will not leave you." You voice is hoarse. Your body strung tight. Muscles and a base primal fear begging you to do just that. Run.

His face hardens and you catch a glimpse of the Doctor that only those who whisper his name in fear have witnessed. Not at you. No. But that foolish heart of yours. The one that begs to stay. To help.

"I need you to run. Now." He begins to push you away from it all. Away from the baying creatures. The forest seems to grow. To swallow the both of you as he pushes you further and further away. "Go! Before they-"

First part second

"Let me sit here, on the threshold of two worlds. Lost in the eloquence of silence."

-Jalalud'din Rumi (1207-1273) 13th century mystic and poet.

"One of the most beautiful forests in this galaxy." The Doctor whirls as he steps in front of you. Throwing the Tardis doors open with a flourish he grins. "Y/n I give you Tenebris Silva."

Beautiful indeed. The forest had a dark ethereal beauty to it. Shadows clung to the spaces in-between. White fog flowed and clung to the trunks of the trees. Deer like animals peered from around them. Their large eyes catching the light from inside the Tardis before darting off into the darkness.

The trees were such a deep green they matched the eternally night sky. The tops brushing the sky as if they were painting the smattering of stars and clouds high above. They moved and swayed with the breeze. Creaked and groaned as the wood fought against the wind far above.

All you could do was look in aw. Spinning on the spot as your feet dug into soft earth and pine needles. The air was so sweet. So clear and clean. It was if you were taking a breath of air for the first time. You breathed in deeply. As if you were trying to etch this air into your lungs. Commit it to memory so you would never forget.

You could hear the Doctor laugh as you did this. You must have looked a little silly you thought. Spinning about like a child. Still, you didn't stop. Trying to drink in every bit of this place you could. Trying to remember it so that one day you could look back. Such a happy memory it would be.

The Tardis doors closed and for a brief moment you were plunged into darkness. The half moon provided little light. As did the stars far away as they were. You jumped when you felt the Doctors hand land on your shoulder. A flashlight was pressed into your hands as the Doctor turned his own on.

"Come along then. There's a cabin here." The two of you began to walk. The Doctor stopped. Muttered to himself then began walking in the complete opposite direction. You couldn't help the laugh that escaped you. "Oh hush you. Unless you don't want to see the once in a lifetime meteor shower." You really did laugh at this.

"You wouldn't." You nudged his shoulder with yours. He tried to keep that angry look on his face but it soon fell.

"No. Not to you." His free arm wrapped around your shoulder. "But you'll love it. When they fall they light up every color you could ever imagine. It's like a firework show but better." His head dipped low. "And I can guarantee whatever you are imagining isn't even going to compare to what you are about to see." He pulled his head up. "Although that doesn't mean that you lack imagination. Or that you don't have a brilliant mind or." You stopped him by shining your flashlight in his face.

"Stop it you." You turn your head shining your light about the lightly worn path the two of you were taking. It was more of a deer trail really. A thin worn dirt path with a decent amount of brush on either side. "How far is it to this cabin?" You shiver. The planet may have an eternal night but it was no colder than a normal night on Earth.

"Not far." The Doctor responded. "Tired already? The fun hasn't even begun! We're supposed to." He stopped. Shined his light away from the path. You followed yours with it.

"Doctor?" You ask. Peering around him as he plucked something off of the brush next to him. You heard him hum as he brought it in front of him so you could see.

"Fabric. That's strange. No one else is supposed to be here. Or have been here for a long time." The fabric was a dark denim. Similar to the jacket you were wearing now. The Doctor moved it about. Checking it every which way. He brought it to his nose and gave it quite the loud sniff.

You arched a brow and chuckled. "That smell any good?" The Doctor looks to you. Shakes his head. He looked as if he were trying to recall something. He pockets the fabric and pulls you along the path.

"It's nothing. Probably. Maybe." The two of you broke through the brush. The tree line opening up to an open field with the cabin in the center of it. The ground breaks off to a cliff face with mountains jutting above the horizon. "And no. It didn't smell good." The both of you laugh.

The cabin is dark and very very big. It toward at least three stories and spread the length of a football field and then some. There was no electricity either. Candles and lanterns lined the walls. The Doctor flicked his sonic as the two of you entered. The inside of the cabin bathed in soft orange light.

The floor was carpeted. Paintings hung on every available inch of wall. Only broken by cabinets or hanging plants. The air smelled of something familiar to you. One you couldn't place.

You took the time to look around while the Doctor scribbled away in what you assumed to be a log book. Like the kind that hotel owners have. You brushed your fingers along the frame of one of the paintings. Was this place a hotel? You would have to ask the Doctor.

"Alright! Off to our rooms then." The Doctor spun bringing his hands together. The lanterns lit themselves as the two of you climbed a flight of stairs to the next floor.

You couldn't help but get a weird sense of deja'vu as you walked. Something bugging you in the the back of your mind. You shrugged your shoulders as a shiver ran down your back. While the Doctor was unlocking the door to one of your rooms you glanced back down the hallway. The further down it went it seemed like the darkness swallowed the light.

Your ears began to ring as your continued to look about. Something. Something wasn't entirely right. One of the lanterns flicked before going out briefly. Cold washed over you and you couldn't help but feel like you were being watched.

"Y/n?" The Doctor's head popped over your shoulder as he looked down the hallway with you. You jumped and spun on the spot. A hand over your know rapidly beathing heart.

"Jesus Doctor! You scared the life out of me." He looked from down the hallway to you. A curious look on his face. 

"Are you alright?" His hands were on your shoulders. Eyes searching your face as if he could find the answer he was looking for there.

"Ya. I." You stuttered out. "I was just lost in thought in all." At this he gave a soft huff. 

"Must have been some thought." His voice was quiet. "Anyways. Your room!" The door swung open to reveal a lavish room. A large canopied bed with sheer, wine red curtains. A dark chestnut chest sat at the end of it. As you walked through the door you saw a plush couch that matched the color of the bed. In the center of the room was a small table with chairs at either side.

"This looks like something my parents would love to be in." You said. You turned. Brushing your hand along the fabric of the couch. Then again. That smell. Something so familiar you could almost place it. It was stronger here. "That being said. It's beautiful Doctor." The Time Lord in question  was leaning against the door frame. A soft smile on his lips. "Thank you for taking me here." You genuinely meant it. Everything this man has shown you. You wish you had more than just words you could say. 

"No need for thanks y/n." He pushed himself away from the doorframe. "Cards?" He pulls a deck from his pocket. How deep those things are you'll never know. You've seen him pull out things that range from childrens toys to tools, and the oddball snack.

"You always win though." You grumbled. "It's not fair." Despite your protests you sat down at the table. The Doctor had already been dealing out the cards.

"Ace of spades?" You asked with a yawn. The cards blurred in your hand. It could have been ace of spades. It could have been the queen of hearts. 

"Go fish." Another yawn. You pull out a card from the half hazard pile on the table. 

"Doctor?" You ask. Shuffling the cards around in your hand. You had well over ten cards. Maybe more. The Doctor hummed in response. "It's late." You laid the cards face down on the table.

The Doctor turned his wrist. Checking the time. "That it is." He shuffled his cards. Picked his head up.  "Oh." His mouth rested in a small o. Slightly looking away. "Oh! You need to sleep!" He laid his own cards down. Standing up as he took in your tired state. Head rested on your hand. Eyes struggling to stay open. Slightly nodding as you tried to stay within the waking world. "Oh you need to get to bed." 

You were laughing as the Doctor lifted you to your feet. "Come on to bed with you." You through your jacket on the table. "Humans. Really I forget sometimes." You doubted that. The poor man was apologizing left and right as you unlaced your boots. Tossing them to the left of you somewhere. 

"Doctor its fine." You were sat on the edge of the bed. You almost sunk into it the mattress was so soft. "Really." Instead of listening he was rattling off everything that could happen with sleep deprivation and "Really. It's ridiculous how much you lot need to sleep. Oh what am I going to do." You tuned him out after a bit.  Instead choosing to lay back onto the bed.

There. Again. That familiar scent. Sort of woodsy. It was clean and bright with something spiced at the end. What was it? You turned your head.

Oh. Your bag.

When did you bring that?

Sure enough there was your backpack. The poor thing was worn in a lot of places but you used it every time you stayed the night somewhere. It was essentials mostly. Toiletries. Extra clothes. Phone charger and camera. And your perfume.

You sat up abruptly. The Doctor stopped his rambling then. He was watching you as you pulled the bag into your lap. You were digging around when he came next to you. There. The bottle.  

You pulled your perfume out of the bag and looked at the bottle. It was something you used almost all the time. This one was brand new though.

The bottle was halfway empty. Did you put the wrong one in?

"When did I bring this?" You whispered to yourself. Head tilting as you tried to remember when you had packed the bag let alone brought it with you. The Doctor said nothing as you placed the bottle back inside the bag. There was something in the air between the two of you. Something you were both forgetting. Something important.  

"Time for bed. Ya?" You spoke after a moment. You looked up at the Doctor. The two of you staring at one another for a moment. Something unspoken passing between the both of you. 

"Sleep well. I'm right across the hall." The Doctor told you. You didn't move even after he had left the room. The smell of chocolate and patchouli lingering in the room when he did. It fades after a few minutes. 

You're sat at the edge of the bed. The pajama's you planned to change into sitting in your lap. There was just something you were unable to shake. How was it you were able to smell your perfume when you've never been here before? And your bag. How was it here? You didn't remember grabbing it when you left the Tardis.

And that scrap of fabric. The one the Doctor had tucked away.  " No one else is supposed to be here. Or have been here for a long time." The Doctors words echo in your thoughts. Then how was it here? Just how long has this planet been alone for? 

A once in a lifetime experience. Then how come there wasn't more people? This place could house hundreds upon hundreds of people and their families. 

You change into sweats and a long sleeve t shirt.  Laying your old clothes on the table you had been playing cards on just moments ago. Your jacket. You couldn't help but stare. Something you wore quite often. An unassuming piece of fabric you had never really given a second thought to before. 

You shook your head and laughed at yourself. You were being silly. Thinking to deeply into something that wasn't event there. Drawing the covers back you crawl into bed. The Sheets were smooth and silky. Soft against you as you sunk down into the mattress.

Sleep came quickly and easily. Your body and mind to tired to be able to do much else. 

Second part Third

"I am fragile and Unholy. Open. Ravage. Eat."

-Tanaka Mhishi, Literary sexts II ( Via Ghost tears)

Something was horribly wrong.  What it was he didn't know. And oh how he hates not knowing. Especially  when the lives of one of his companions were on the line.

There were clues here. Blaringly obvious clues that go together. He just couldn't figure out how. There, in the woods. A scrap of fabric torn from y/n's jacket. It was clearly theirs. The scent of their perfume still clung to it. And it was here to, in the hotel. It floated in the air so thickly he could almost taste it.  What was normally a scent he found comforting and refreshing turned his stomach.

Why. Just why would they do that? Why would they do something that made it so clear that they were here before? 

Then there was the ledger. Names upon names from hours ago. The planet had a day night cycle that would last one earth week before plunging back into the day. They're names were at the top. So why was it dark? 

The Doctor found himself leaving his room. Stopping momentarily in front of y/n's door. His ear pressed against the wood. He could hear their breathing. The soft speaking they always did. Although they didn't admit it. Safe. They should be safe for now.

He opened one door. Then another. And another. 

Each one was filled to the brim of life. A lack of people but clearly it had been lived in not to long ago.

The last door he checked he opened so harshly it smacked against the walls. The door bouncing back with a mock laughter as he entered. His sonic went wild as he scanned the room. His twin hearts began their panicked beating before his own thoughts could catch up.

They needed to leave. And now.

 Chronophage.  Chronophage . Chronophage . Chronophage .

The words were painted on every single wall and every available surface there was.  The Doctor brushed his fingers against the paint. It was tacky. Not quiet dried yet. 

"Time eater." His body rushed with cold. "Time eater." He spoke again.

That 's why. Oh they were most defiantly here before. It could have been days. Weeks. Months.  The Doctor turned on heel. Running back down the length of the hallway.  There was no knowing on how long it has been. But he knew that y/n had less time to give. They could gorge themselves on the lives he's lived. Let them take it all.

But them? Oh gods not them.

He was rounding the corner when he heard it. Palm pressed against the wall as he steadied himself. Paintings fell. Crashed to the floor. 

His body when ridged when a shrill scream echoed down the hall. 

If he could he would have ran faster. Willed his body to do so. Praying with the names he knew that they would be ok.

Crashing and banging. 

"Doctor!"

He has never heard them scream like that.

.

Something had woken you from your sleep. It wasn't that uncommon for you to wake multiple times when in a new place. You body to on edge to truly fall into a deep sleep. Every strange noise would have you tossing and turning. 

So the next time you woke you took  a moment to just lay there. Eyes closed as you listened to the sounds around you. There was the softness of your breathing. The creaking of the hotel settling. Somewhere outside and animal bayed. Calling out to the moon that filtered light through the curtains canopying your bed.

You were warm and comfortable. Cradled by the thick blankets and pillows surrounding you. You breathed in deeply. Sighed. Another deep breath and.

What was that?

Fabric rustled in front of you. The sound of skin gliding across silken material hit your ears next. You stilled. Cold washing over you as your began to realize that you were not alone.  The bed dipped next to you. The wood creaking and groaning from the added weight.

Your breathing stuttered. Everything stilled. 

For a moment you tried to convince yourself that it was the Doctor. That he was just playing a cruel joke on you. But you couldn't find the smell of chocolate and patchouli. A scent you found comforting. Safe.

No. No. No.

Something hovered above your cheek. Something so cold you could feel it before it even touched you.

Your body wound itself tightly. Your heart pounding a rhythm in your chest. Your fist balled beneath your pillow. 

And with a yell you struck. Cried out. 

The creature screamed as it scrambled backwards. Taking the curtains and the blankets with it. 

Move. You needed to move.

You were glued to the spot. Sitting near the edge of the bed but to terrified to move. You tried to. Tried to at least yell. To cry out for the Doctor.

Everything stilled. 

The fabric on the floor moved. Going up like a joked attempt of a sheet ghost before falling away from the figure it was draped on.

It was tall and skinny. Skin going from hues of grey to a deep rich black. That black seemed to swallow it. To consume the room. You could almost feel it. It was so close to being tangible that you could feel pinpricks hit your skin. It was painful. Almost fire like.

It's head tilted. Golden eyes widening when it saw you move. Just a twitch of your leg.

It leaned forward.

Move.

It's hand brushed the now bare mattress.

Move.

The darkness followed with it. Flowed over the white of the mattress.

MOVE!

And you did. Falling backwards onto the floor before scrambling to your feet. The creature stood to move with you but got caught on the railings for the curtains. You took this brief moment to grab your boots before darting to the door.

A shrill scream left you lips when you heard it growl and snarl. It toppled the bed in its anger. The tables and chairs being thrown to the side as you crossed the threshold of the door.

"Doctor!" A sob tore through your throat. Nothing but desperation left your lips.

'"Y/N!" The Doctor caught you in his arms. Held you closely as your body shook. "We have to go. We need to go. Now." The both of you turned towards what was once your room. The creature inside was yelling. Crying. Upset that you had left.

Quickly you pulled your boots on. Allowing the Doctor to take you hand the two of you ran from the hotel. Down the halls. All but flying down the stairs and towards the large double doors the two of you had crossed not long ago.

Third part Last

"If there is a light then I am going to swallow it. If there is a god then i'm going to make him cry."

-s.osborn, from "blasphemies as the 5th street station, " published in The Rising Phoenix review (vialifeinpoetry) 

The forest was dark. Deep and heavy as it swallowed the both of you. The creatures would not leave you be. They followed every step you took. Swallowed every sound you made. The two of  you were prey in the worst way possible. A horrid game of cat and mouse as they turned you around again and again.

The Doctor had explained the best he could. These paradoxil creatures. That the two of you had lived this moment more than once. They would send their victims back again and again with a little less of themselves each time. 

They consume the life you have lived and use it for themselves. They take and take and take until they are almost immortalized.  Their own veritable fountain of youth.

Their victims would becomes less of themselves each time. Losing pivotable live moments that shaped them into who the had become. Entire lifetimes lost until they became a husk. Unable to do anything  more that live on a robotic life.  And many did not last long afterwards.

You could see the path that others took. Deep footsteps pressed into soft dirt. They had dropped things ranging from clothes and jewelry. Childrens toys and the odd suitcase here and there.

"We helped them." The Doctor told you. Spinning in circles as he tried to use his sonic to find the Tardis. The poor girl was calling out to him. A victim in this just as much as you were.  "There." The Doctor stilled. The light of the sonic bright and green. It sung out a high pitched tune as you stumbled up next to the Doctor. 

You were tired and worn. Mentally exhausted and hurt from head to toe. Both of you were  in a sorry state. The Doctor had lost his dress coat. His bowtie  had been torn away and the white of his shirt was slowly being stained a muddied brown. You were no better. Holes in your shirt from where the brush tore it. There was mud stained from hip to ankle from when you tripped. 

There again. There they were. Slinking around the trees. Calling out to you. Hungry. They were so hungry.

You were pulled away from them. The Doctors hand was on your upper arm. His face was alight with worry. "Run." The word was whispered. Desperate as he spoke to you.

Run you did. Cut off time and time again the closer you got to the Tardis. They were not going to let you go. 

"Why won't they let us go." It was a broken sob that left your lips. To worn and tired to truly care about the way you sounded. You wanted to go back to the Tardis. To find comfort in her and the Doctor as the two of you tried to put this all behind you.

"Me. They won't let me." The Doctor drew you in close. "I am sorry. So so sorry." He hid you away from the world for just a moment. He could see the Tardis in the distance. She called out to him. Begged him to come back. To bring the two of you back to her where she could get the both of you to safety. To anywhere but here. 

He could feel you tremble and shake. The soft push you gave as you tried to get even closer to him. "No." He felt you mutter into his neck. "No. I know what you mean by that." You pulled away. "I will not let you sacrifice yourself. We leave. Together or not at all."

The Doctor, for the first time, cursed you humanity. Cursed the fact that you cared so deeply.  He pressed his head to yours. His hand curling around the back of your neck. You could hear him speaking. Muttering in a language that the Tardis refused to translate. Even now. In this moment. 

The creatures. The Chronophage. You could hear them. Speaking. Whispering. Calling out to you. Begging you to help them. That they were starving. Near death. How could you be so selfish just feed them.

For a brief moment you see it. The meteor shower the Doctor had brought you to see. The  reason why you were even here. It seemed the shower itself were in your eyes. It took your breath away as the air around you lit up in color. 

The Doctor had pulled away. Watched you as you watched the sky. Something you would never have seen in your lifetime if it had not been for him. He has seen this before. Time and time again he would come back. He was grateful that in this moment, despite the horror around him, he got to see it though you. Such a soft look on your face as you forgot about the beasts around you. 

Chronophage. Time eaters. Eater of time. There is only a few names that made the Doctor fear for his life. 

 It would be a miracle if you two made it out of here. Already the both of you had lost pieces of yourself that would never return. Moments in time that you will never get back. The simplest things shaping you into who you were. And not for the first time the Doctor mourns your loss.

There. The Tardis. Just feet away. 

Already he was losing you. The creatures were feasting even as the two of you ran. The Tardis had thrown her doors open. Calling out as loud as she was able. Soft yellow light bathing the ground in front of her. 

Not again. She would not lose the both of you again. 

Eleventh Doctor x insecure/ anxious reader?

🫀REQUESTS ARE OPEN🫀 || Doctor Who-inspired playlist

"Cold feet" - 11th Doctor x Reader

SUMMARY: Funnily enough, after facing death and vicious aliens, it's small talk with strangers that gives you cold feet. Fortunately enough, you found yourself in the company of an expert on running away.

WORDCOUNT: ~ 1.9k

A/N: As an anxious person I cannot be thankful enough for people in my life who casually roll with my anxiety and don't try to "fix" it with cheap advice

"Time Lord to human! Are you listening to me?"

The sudden yelling shook you awake. Only then did you realize you zoned out in the first place, letting Doctor's rushed words brush right by you. You looked at him only to see pure annoyance seeping from his expression. Although you never meant to hurt him, the guilt still gnawed at you.

"Sorry, missed the last bit," you explained yourself as you awkwardly rubbed the back of your neck. "What were you saying?"

Instead of repeating his scientific ramblings which definitely would have been a little too fast and complex for you to understand, he shifted his posture to rest his hands on his hips. You felt as if he had caught you red-handed doing something he had absolutely prohibited you from doing.

"Oi, what's going on with you? It's like you've lost your head."

You absentmindedly shook your head to dismiss his worry. "Yeah, sorry, it's no-"

"Are you in love?"

For a moment you couldn't get any sound to leave your mouth. "What?" It was a bizarre conclusion to jump to. You couldn't tell what on Earth could even get him that idea. "No, it's on-"

"Good for you!" he said as he clapped his hands. "Now, moving on. Focus, eyes on me."

"Look, it's just that I've got a..." you suspended your voice thinking of the right word to use. The Doctor stared at you with wide eyes, clearly awaiting the second part of the sentence. "Thing."

"A thing?" he repeated in confusion. It seemed as if with each of your words he only grew more offended at your misplaced attention.

"Yes, a thing." Out of all the words you could have used, your choice seemed to have fallen on the worst and least exhaustive one. "My friend, Ada, is throwing a party for some of her college friends but apart from me everyone invited is from her course, so she's going to be the only person I know there."

"And that's what you've been thinking about while I was explaining my clever, clever plan?"

The Doctor stared at you with closely knit eyebrows. In some way, he couldn't fathom how a party invitation could be in any way more interesting than him showing off his extraordinary intellect and creativity. Choosing between a college party and aliens should have been a lot easier than it truly was.

"It's not as simple as it sounds, you know?"

"Alright, then tell me." By his hand-flapping and surprisingly undivided attention, you couldn't tell whether he was growing more upset or actually wanted to hear about what was troubling you.

"Honestly, I don't want to go but it's important for Ada. Also, I haven't seen her in ages. On the other hand..." your voice drifted away. Now that you've started this little heart-to-heart, it was pointless to lie to the Doctor - if successful, fooling him wouldn't gain anything anyway. "It's a party full of strangers."

For a moment he stared at you in silence, visibly expecting you to elaborate but truthfully, there wasn't anything more to say. The hypothetical group of strangers, as faceless as they were, was already stressful enough, even without giving them imaginary traits or habits.

"Strangers, right," he said as he clasped his hands. The sound echoed throughout the console room. He looked away for a moment, basking in enlightenment, before looking back at you. "How exactly is that a problem?" he dwelled on the subject. It seemed as if the discomfort of a company of strangers was hardly conceivable.

"You wouldn't get it." You vaguely waved your hand at him in a dismissive manner. Maybe it was unfair towards him but you really couldn't imagine a scenario in which he doesn't throw in a sarcastic comment about your anxiety. "I mean, how could you? Socializing has never been a problem for you."

"How could it be? People, party, cake, dancing. I love dancing! Great times, nothing to be scared of."

"Yes, there is: small talk and thirty people I've never met. And that's only the beginning."

Even the mere mention of that situation made a cold shiver run down your spine. A flutter of anxiety in your chest brought an unpleasant, suffocating sensation. Unconsciously, your face contorted in a grimace.

"You just go up to them and talk, what's hard about that?"

"Everything!" you exclaimed as you made a broad movement with your hands. "It's just... I can't do that. I physically can't make myself go up to a stranger and ask how they're doing, I'd rather hit my head against a wall. I know the theory, the 'walking through a house' metaphor, it's just... I can't force my body to do that. And when I do find myself talking to a stranger, I want it to end immediately. And the silence! Oh God, the silence... Like when you ask them a question, they answer and then the silence. The awkward silence of my anxiety, lack of social skills and being a generally uninteresting person. Just a bit of quiet and everyone knows I'm weird, awkward and-"

"Hey, hey, stop it!" he scolded you in a whiny voice as if you were a child. "Don't say that. You're not awkward or weird, you're brilliant!"

"Thanks, that's nice of you but unfortunately, I am self-aware."

He may have known you for weeks but you've known yourself for decades.

"No, really." He refused to let go. If the Doctor was going to spout cliche pick-me-ups, he appeared exceptionally committed to the meaningless act. "You crossed the universe as it is wide and long. Fought aliens and risked your life because a toddler couldn't sleep at night. Blimey, you told a Sontaran with a bomb bigger than your head to piss off. And it's house party small talk that gives you cold feet?"

Contrary to his presumption, the context didn't give you any comfort or motivation - it only made you feel worse. If you really were as brave as he made it seem, why couldn't you just start a conversation with your friend's guests? By the measure of saving the universe multiple times, you should be more than capable to do so.

"I know it sounds ridiculous and I agree it's stupid but it's not the same. When we're saving worlds it's a mission, a puzzle to solve." You paused for a moment but by your expression, the Doctor could tell there was something else on your mind. "And I've got you," you added.

"Me?" he asked sheepishly. The Doctor vaguely pointed his finger at himself. "What does that have to do with me?"

"You make me a little braver. I mean, you don't look scared even when you are, so it gives me a little push. I feel a little less anxious when I know that you've got my back."

"So what do you do when I'm not there?"

"Bail," you answered with a shrug. Were you really the same person who criticized the fashion choices of an alien with more guns than limbs? "I rarely go but when I do, I just run off around midnight like Cinderella." You made a small pause when you lowered your gaze, avoiding the Doctor's face. "Honestly, it always makes me feel ashamed like I'm making myself miss out on something but it's either that or panicking in the bathroom."

A silence fell between you. The Doctor's typical hand flapping came to a strange halt as he continued to stare at you with an inexplicable expression. He would have agreed on your resemblance to Cinderella, your regent-esque charm and princess-like beauty but there seemed to be a matter more important at hand:

"Has that ever happened?"

His voice was surprisingly quiet, hesitant even as if he didn't want to actually know the answer. Maybe he wasn't sure he was ready for the responsibility the knowledge would bring. The Doctor's words were barely audible over the whirring and wheezing of the TARDIS's engineering.

"Which part?"

"Panicking in the bathroom."

"Yeah," you said quietly. Your gaze fell to the floor. Looking for some kind of comfort, you slowly rubbed your arm. "It was New Year at my friend's, didn't know anyone there except for him. At some point, I just needed to take a break from being around so many people. I sat in the bathroom wearing a silver sequin ballgown and fought back tears. Funny, I probably looked equally pathetic and great. The only thing I could think about was how rubbish I was at just hanging out with people and, you know, being a normal teen at a normal teen party filled with normal teens. I just..." you stopped yourself at the last moment possible. A heavy, defeated sigh left your lips before you continued in a voice barely above a whisper. "I just wish I was a little less anxious."

"You never said anything."

"Why would I? It's not something I'm exactly proud of." You let out a bitter chuckle as you answered him.

Suddenly you found yourself engulfed in a tight hug. The Doctor's arms were tightly wrapped around you, his slow but ragged breath brushing against your neck. Surprised at the unforeseen affection, you hesitantly reciprocated the embrace. The tweed of his jacket was slightly coarse, some strings were coming out of the seams. He always smelled like burnt wires and a second-hand bookshop. At first, that distinct fragrance wasn't exactly pleasant to you but with time it became a beacon of hope, comfort, adventure and a good laugh.

"Oh, you brilliant, clever you," he quietly said in a sad voice.

Then he stepped away from you just as swiftly and surprisingly as he hugged you in the first place. The first thing you noticed was the change in his facial expression: the Doctor was no longer annoyed or concerned but excited as if he had just come up with a perfect solution to some mind-boggling problem.

"Well then, good thing you're not going alone this time."

"I'm... not?"

"Yes! A plus-one. It's still a thing, right? I'm your plus-one."

"That's sweet of you but you really don't have to. I'm fine on my own," you assured him, although he had no reason to believe you after what you'd already told him.

"Change of plans, sweetheart!" he exclaimed as he pulled one of the many levers. The TARDIS was about to take flight and it was a little too late for arguments and second thoughts. "We're going together and when people become a little too much we attend to an emergency," he said while running between different parts of the flight console. As if he was dancing, he made a whole circle around the control switchboard and stood in front of you once again. The Doctor stuck his index finger in your face as if reprimanding you once more. "No panicking in the bathrooms."

"Wait, what emergency?" you asked as he was already taking directions to your hometown.

"You know, this very real emergency that can't wait and we have to take care of it at the very moment. The crisis that I definitely did not invent just now."

"Right..." you drew out your answer as you caught on to his ruse. A smile crept unto your face. "Time travellers, defenders of the universe. You can never know when you're needed. Any suspicions as to what the emergency is?"

"Laskos' fourth moon. There's that small waffle bar that might need an inspection."

one of my favorite bits in doctor who is when someone is like your time machine doesn’t work very well does it and the doctor is like Excuse You, This Is A Type 40 TARDIS That Can Go Anywhere In Time And Space. that’s like if i drove to a place where they don’t have cars but know about them and took someone for a drive and they saw cooling that only works on one setting and heat that barely works and a broken cd player despite the functioning tape deck and shaky brakes and they went mate your cars a bit shit isn’t it and you were like fuck you, this is a 2002 toyota camry, it can drive on roads