>zutara Romance Makes No Sense

>zutara romance makes no sense

>ships zukka

lmao the fujo goggles are strong here

> begins by clarifying there’s nothing objectively wrong with the ship and self-censors so that it stays out of shippers’ feeds and doesn’t bother them

> post is about lack of platonic fandom content

> post was not supposed to be condemnation of the romantic ship but I will admit I have a personal distaste for it so if that was apparent in my writing, my bad. main point was supposed to be that the ship is not what the canon was implying and changes some very important and often overlooked character details if viewed through such a lens

> zukka is mentioned as a one-off in post yes but an examination of other posts of mine will reveal that jinko, in fact, solos

> personal distaste for said ship is also admittedly in large part to being a kataang enjoyer I also will not deny

> zukka shippers don’t feel the need to prove that their ship is canon so the fandom content has a satisfactory amount of platonic content, as such it does not bother me to the point where I post about it

> I don’t think I posted my ship tierlist here (didn’t want to poke that many hornet’s nests at once) but zukka is like. barely a top 3 Zuko ship for me. it goes jinko, aroace zuko/zuko x nobody (zuko alone lol), zukki, zukka, zuki.

> yuri better. happy national yuri day folks

if you have any more questions, concerns, or accusations, feel free to ask and i am happy to clarify. i did write the original post at twelve am at night and such a time leads to dubiously worded choices and as such if there are any phrases, particular writing choices or anything else you’d like to clear up, let me know. the last thing I’d want is for my very important fandom opinions to be misunderstood. next time feel free to turn off anonymous questions so i can personally dm you and don’t have to make any sort of post that would further heighten my chances of ending up on a certain ship’s side of tumblr and therefore increase the likelihood of getting more anonymous asks like this one.

Hotguy is...

performing a soliloquy? is that hamlet that he's performing? where on earth did he-

Shh!!

right sorry yeah i'll be quiet in the theatre

my uncle killed my father and married with my mother and now i must *remembers that suicide jokes do nothing for my mental health and wellbeing* put on a play

rip fire hazard siblings you would have both either loved and resonated with Hamlet or found the play uncomfortably familiar and not been able to read through it a second time but either way you both would’ve been putting Hamlet on the kinlist for different but valid reasons

lrt been thinking again about a Hamlet Swap AU, this time about the logistics of Laertes and Ophelia sharing the Hamlet and Horatio roles of the original play. Slightly more emphasis on an Ophelia/Hamlet parallel, but both get to play the part.

Haven’t really worked things out, but the basic gist is that it’s likelier to be set in a more modern era, with both having lost their mother at a young age and having varying relationships with Polonius. But one day, Polonius dies of seemingly natural causes, and both are left in shock and grief.

Ophelia finds out, somehow, and quite probably in a non-ghost more actual-evidence manner that Polonius’s death was murder, more specifically murder via Claudius (that might have actually been an attempt to murder Hamlet Sr that went wrong). However, the evidence she finds is possibly coincidental and not conclusive enough to immediately jump to capital vengeance, so after telling Laertes of her discovery, the two agree that they must find some way to properly prove it.

Ophelia hasn’t been in a particularly good state of mind after the death of her father, but she decides she’s going to pretend to be perfectly fine and that she doesn’t need help in order to get people off her back so she can explore her theories further.

All the while, Ophelia’s boyfriend Hamlet notices that she’s putting up an emotional wall and tries to talk to her. His dad’s alive and well, and besides the fact that his girlfriend’s been in a spot of misery lately and he’s only just gotten back from Wittenberg to be able to comfort her, he’s doing otherwise just fine. He’d come prepared, having asked his good friend Horatio for advice on how to empathise with those who’d lost loved ones, and Horatio had warned him that she might act different and could counter-intuitively, possibly need space. Also Horatio is totally in love with Hamlet. So Hamlet does give her some space eventually, but he’s really concerned.

Gertrude also tries to talk to Ophelia, but she brushes her off. Laertes, who’s been less present in the story so far because he’s been off trying to figure out how to gather evidence, comes back with news of something new that might help them.

This is where I start to have less details figured out.

Hamlet eventually confronts Ophelia, desperate to try and help her, and she’s alllllmost contemplating telling him the truth and asking for his help when she realises they’re being watched, by she assumes either Claudius, Gertrude, Hamlet Sr, or some combination, and so she decides not to. Instead, she yells at him, accusing him of being a terrible person and not being there for her and then not leaving her alone when she asks, for only wanting to get in her pants (i’ll totally explore her objectification in this one too and this will be relevant even if it’s not really true I prommy), and almost insinuating that she’s seeing someone else in order to break his heart and get him to move on, hopefully leave, because she knows things are about to get messy. It looks like it might work, and he’s super sad about it.

Blah blah blah, equivalent of the Mousetrap, Ophelia and someone else (possibly Laertes, probably Hamlet, possibly someone else from around the castle) talk, and Hamlet Sr, hiding in the curtains, gets stabbed. Hamlet finds the body (if he wasn’t the one to talk to Ophelia in the previous scene) with Ophelia, freaks out, goes to find someone to tell them about it and walks in on his mother and his uncles totes having an affair (yikes). It’s no wonder he goes mad.

Ophelia is sent away, and Hamlet is forced to stay. He does sort of lose his marbles a little bit, but instead of singing and giving out flowers like Ophelia, he rambles about death and talks nonsensically to himself in the court. And by ‘talks nonsensically’, I mean reverts to speaking in only direct quotes from the original Shakespearean play in this modern adaptation. see Gertrude or someone remarking on how he’s clearly lost his mind and is speaking nonsense all while Hamlet is clearly and obviously reciting the ‘to be or not to be’ speech to himself.

Horatio comes quickly from England, but the very night he gets there, he’s pulled aside by Marcellus to deal with something on the roof. That something is Hamlet, shivering and wide-eyed, talking about the ghost of his father. Horatio can’t stop the prince as he follows, slips, and falls off to his death.

Meanwhile Ophelia doesn’t have a Royal Sigil on her, but she does have a brother, and Laertes comes and helps bust her out during her transport, takes care of the messengers, and brings her back to the castle. The two seal their fates together, and vow revenge.

That’s pretty much where I’ve thought up to (there WILL be a fistfight in the grave between Horatio and Ophelia about who loved Hamlet more) but yeah it’s just for the sillies

okay so Zuko would be so into (if he isn’t already) competitive improv/theatresports.

like this is the guy that for two seasons straight threw himself at the Avatar with no plan. no nothing. entirely just the hope that he would think of SOMETHING, at some point.

this is Zuko ‘… yes. I juggle.’ and not only that, but this is Zuko proceeds-to-attempt-to-juggle-with-the-skill-of-a-travelling-actor-with-no-prior-experience-because-he-cannot-help-but-yes-and-a-prompt. and he justifies his immediate failure as well.

this is also established Theatre Kid ‘They butchered Love Amongst Dragons every year!’ Zuko. he’s no stranger to the stage.

I reckon he’d be really good at the bonus-point high-pressure games (Story Story Die, What Are You Doing, etc) and his strengths would lie in having all the game techniques perfectly memorised (and being able to give effective feedback at the end of each round), being willing to throw himself across the stage for a bit, and NEVER backing down from an offer. he’s also unintentionally hilarious because he’s an intimidating looking guy and he can’t always commit realistically to all character types but Oh Boy can he get himself into Situations. and he just says the darnedest rich kid things onstage when he’s not trying. he would also have Opinions on the judging and make small comments about the other team’s scores (‘that story was NOT a seven. they didn’t even get establish that the rocket got back to the gummy worm queen!’)

he’d make for a really good Director (three years captaining a ship does that to you), and i reckon he’d probably be adept with the book in Actor’s Nightmare. the ideal position to put him in Space Jump is first and you’ll get the best offers from him when you’re playing New Choice and you New Choice him juuuust enough so that he runs out of sensible things to say and panics and says perhaps the craziest thing that both of you are just now hearing for the first time.

anyway theatresports Zuko when