He's So Clingy

he's so clingy

(comm info/ kofi support)

Longtime followers will know that there used to be a time when the entire blog was covered head and toe with Nikolai Gogol! It's raining horribly where I am, I'm alone in a coffee shop and listening to Melanie Martinez and then the idea to write for this clown came to mind.

𝐘𝐀𝐍𝐃𝐄𝐑𝐄 𝐍𝐈𝐊𝐎𝐋𝐀𝐈 𝐆𝐎𝐆𝐎𝐋, who's a lot more subtle than anyone could ever have predicted. He has been in your life much longer than he ought to be but that was his special way of keeping tabs on you. Like most things in life, this infatuation was not planned. He doned on the disguise of a simple waiter who worked in a coffee shop near your campus. As most of his work he needed to be undercover but newfound delights took place instead of his task.

𝐘𝐀𝐍𝐃𝐄𝐑𝐄 𝐍𝐈𝐊𝐎𝐋𝐀𝐈 𝐆𝐎𝐆𝐎𝐋, who is so charming that you can't help but come to the coffee shop daily. It was a little humiliating how much you liked the man but it could not be helped. In your eyes he was just a simple man working a minimum wage, a regular Joe... Who just happened to be out of this world charismatic and charming. You were confident that he could charm the pants of anyone he desired but he kept casual... Most of the time!

𝐘𝐀𝐍𝐃𝐄𝐑𝐄 𝐍𝐈𝐊𝐎𝐋𝐀𝐈 𝐆𝐎𝐆𝐎𝐋, who stops charging you for drinks because this isn't actually his job and is not taking it 100% seriously - but he also wants you to feel special! It's fun to gauge out your reactions and study your mannerisms. It was nothing but a fun little game to him, just something cute to pass the time. You were adorable, so easy to rile up, so easy to amuse. He loved cracking dumb jokes and occasionally asking you some questions. You may have the beauty, but do you have the brains?

𝐘𝐀𝐍𝐃𝐄𝐑𝐄 𝐍𝐈𝐊𝐎𝐋𝐀𝐈 𝐆𝐎𝐆𝐎𝐋, who starts to see that his feelings are becoming more serious as time flies by. He resents you a little, for trapping him in such a manner. He is usually good at separating work and pleasure but if he kept you around that line would start to blur. Being your humble waiter was just not enough anymore. He started to masquerade as other random passerbys in your life such as the cashier, mailman, garbage man. It was only a matter of time until you started to catch on that something was off but Nikolai continued to pull the strings of this play just a little more.

𝐘𝐀𝐍𝐃𝐄𝐑𝐄 𝐍𝐈𝐊𝐎𝐋𝐀𝐈 𝐆𝐎𝐆𝐎𝐋, who leaves you gifts and hints of him and his whereabouts. Sometimes they're normal such as roses and chocolates. Hey, they're a classic for a reason! But the fright in your eyes was dazzling to the jester, it made him want to do things he really had no business doing. He was horrible but human. He had needs and feelings too, no matter how depraved.

♥️ TAGS: @yanroma, @oneoftheprettynerds, @misdollface, @sxy0ung, @rosemary108233, @c4xcocoa, @gettinshiggywithit, @ophticcus, @lakxcpsta, @ranposgirlboss, @robinaxolotl, @acornwinter, @enomane, @ishqani, @hannzai, @bluepeanutharmony, @ficsreblogs, @kaithegremlin, @fyodorscockslut

Dazai, clapping his hands: alright, we have something to announce!

Chuuya: we're dating!

Atsushi: wh—

Akutagawa, not looking up from his book: hah! we already knew that

Atsushi: we did?!!

Akutagawa, looking Atsushi dead in the eyes: and we are also dating

Atsushi: WE ARE?!!

Two detectives in your bed

Self-Aware! Edogawa Ranpo x GN! Reader x Self-Aware! Dazai Osamu

Description: You wanted to take a nap. But, there are two detectives in your bed. And all of your blankets and pillows are gone.

Fluff. Silly short fic.

Warning: OOC. English is my second language.

______

You just wanted to take a nap.

You just wanted to lay down on your bed, cover yourself with the blanket, put your head on a pillow and have a nice nap. Because you deserved this nap. You are working hard in the university. And you are helping with the house chores. You deserved to have a small rest.

The plan was simple. Go into your room - Lay down on the bed - Cover yourself with the blanket - Lay your head on a pillow - Sleep.

Pretty simple plan, right?

Well, wrong! You were wrong!

You shake your head, hoping, that you were just too tired and started seeing things. It must be a mistake and your room should be empty.

You opened your eyes and stare on your bed.

They were still there.

Dazai Osamu and Ranpo Edogawa were laying in your bed. Ranpo was lying across the bed, while Dazai was laying on his side, looking at you with a sly grin.

It's not like you were against their company. Or against anyone's company. It wasn't even the problem, that they were in your room. Or in your bed.

You knew that some of BSD Cast find your room shooting. They love spending time here. They like staying here. And you allowed them to go into your room, while you weren't there.

A few times you returned to your room, finding Lucy reading a book here, or Kunikida, taking notes in his notebook, or Tetchou taking a nap in your bed.

Of course, they have some restrictions. They weren't allowed to search through the drawers, and they must ask if they want to take something from your room to theirs, be it a textbook or a laptop. And, as long as these rules are followed, there were no problems.

So, you weren't angry, that Ranpo and Dazai got into your room when you weren't here. You were angry, that your blanket and pillow were gone.

And, if Ranpo's and Dazai's sly smirks imply something, that they were the reason, they are gone.

You frowned and looked at two 'intruders'.

"What are you two doing in my bed?"

Ranpo rolls on his side and turn his head in your detection. He smirked.

"Oh, you know, just hanging around. Waiting for you."

You rolled your eyes. There is no Purple Sigh on your door, so these two aren't in distress. And it doesn't explain the missing blanket and pillow.

"Why? And where are my blanket and pillow?"

Ranpo's smirk became bigger.

"Somewhere. I wonder where... Do you know where they are, Dazai?"

Dazai chuckled and looked at your direction. He looked as sly as Ranpo.

"Have no idea, Ranpo."

Ranpo hummed.

"Oh, I remember! Kids were building a pillow fort? I recall they were asking for a permission to took blankets and pillows."

You rub your temples. You recall, how Sakura asked your permission to take some blankets and pillows for the pillow fort. Okay, you can do this. It's not like kids took all your blankets and pillows.

You start searching through your shelves, trying to find a blanket and a pillow. You must have a few more somewhere there.

During your search, you felt Ranpo's and Dazai's gazes on you.

Ranpo yawned and looked at Dazai.

"Dazai, have you heard about what happened yesterday? You see, Fyodor and Nikolai were visiting [Y/N]'s old house, trying to retrieve something..."

You let out a nervous whine and feel, like you were burning up. Your cheeks and ears were on fire. You try to focus on anything else, not paying attention to Ranpo.

"... And when they got back home..."

Where are the blankets and pillows?

"... We didn't see [Y/N], Fyodor and Nikolai for the rest of the day and night..."

Maybe they are in this wardrobe?

"... And [Y/N] appeared only at the morning..."

Why you can't find blankets and pillows?!

"... Do you think you can explain, what happened, [Y/N]?"

You turned back and looked at two detectives on your bed. Dazai and Ranpo both looked like two cats, that ate all sour cream in the house. Your face still felt like it was on fire.

You breathe in and out.

"Where... Where are the rest..."

Ranpo grinned and finally opened his eyes.

"Kids wanted to make a huge pillow fort. They took all blankets in the house."

What? Were kids trying to make a fort that is big enough to live in? The idea of going to them and took one pillow and blanket was rejected immediately. It's still daytime, let the kids play.

But, you want to be nice and cozy while taking a nap.

Two detectives noticed your face expression. Dazai dramatically raise both of his hands up.

"Oh, My Dear Iris Flower, don't worry, you won't be cold or uncomfortable! I will be your blanket and Ranpo..."

What? A blanket?

Ranpo waves his hand.

"And I will be your pillow"

You will repeat. What? A pillow?

You blinked owlishly. Dazai open his arms, inviting you to hug him.

"Don't be shy, [Y/N]! Come here and hug me. Look, that I am soft and warm. A perfect blanket."

Ranpo lift his shirt up, showing his stomach.

"And my belly is soft. Softer, than any pillow you will ever have."

Ranpo opened his eyes slightly.

"And, both Dazai and I are much more good-looking than any... print on a pillow case you could find."

YOU DIDN'T EVEN KNOW THAT BSD CAST WERE SELF-AWARE, WHEN YOU ORDER TWO DAKIMAKURAS WITH FYODOR AND NIKOLAI ALMOST A YEAR AGO!

AND, IT'S NOT YOUR FAULT, THAT PACKAGE GOT DELAYED, AND, WHEN IT FINALLY ARRIVED, YOU NOT ONLY FORGET WHAT SHOULD BE INSIDE, BUT ASKED FYODOR AND NIKOLAI TO GET IT FROM YOUR PREVIOUS NEIGHBORS!

AND, YOU DIDN'T KNOW, THAT YOU WERE SHOP'S 5000 CLIENT AND, AS A PRESENT, YOU GET PILLOW CASES FOR DAKIMAKURAS WITH DIFFERENT BSD CHARACTERS!

You feel a chill running down your spine. Yesterday, you spent half of the day and all night, cuddling Fyodor and Nikolai. Well, to be more specific, you were wrapped into a blanket and stuck between Fyodor and Nikolai, that wanted to show you, that they are better than any pillow. And prettier. And clingier. It was the best cuddles you ever had. Almost. All their teasing were unbearable!

You don't want to know, how Ranpo and Dazai learn about the pillows and pillow cases. Either, because they are Dazai and Ranpo. Or because Fyodor and Nikolai told them. It doesn't matter right now.

...

You probably could take a nap in the living room. On the couch. With no pillows and blankets.

Or, you can give up and have a nap with Ranpo and Dazai. And, once again, cuddled for the rest of the day.

Ranpo, whose eyes were still opened, laughed.

"There are no free blankets or pillows in the house. Your nap on the couch will be cold. Besides," Ranpo had a tight grin on his face. "Is it really that bad to sleep with us?"

You massage your temples. It wasn't bad, just... They will never let you live the dakimakuras incident down, right?

Dazai give you the best puppy dog eyes he can.

"Are you tired, Dear [Y/N]?" Dazai cooed, opening his arms for a hug again. "Take a nap. You will feel better!"

You give up and plopped down on your bed, rolled to Dazai and put your head on Ranpo's stomach.

He was soft and warm. You still can't believe, that BSD Gang were real, breathing, living people.

Dazai nested on top of you, pinning your hands between his chest and yours. Dazai's face pressed against the crook of your neck.

Ranpo's fingers started running through your hair.

"Aren't we better, than any pillow or blanket you will ever have? Or any pillow case?"

You let out a tiny groan.

"I already explained it, that I forgot about the package! It took almost a year to be delivered!"

Ranpo chuckled and Dazai rub his nose against your throat.

"Dear Iris Flower, don't be embarrassed. You gift us a great opportunity to cuddle with you more!"

You rolled your eyes.

"Yea, it's not like we don't snuggle almost every day"

Ranpo and Dazai laugh a little. Dazai kissed the tip of your nose.

"Well, I still want more cuddles!"

Ranpo poked your cheek.

"So am I."

You mumble something, but close your eyes and doze off. Dazai and Ranpo were great as a blanket and pillow.

Right before falling in Dream Kingdom, you heard Ranpo's voice.

"Sleep tight, [Y/N]. Have a good dreams."

conditioned ft. kaeya

nsfw. everyone is conditioned to react a certain way when they hear certain phrases or words. however in your boyfriend decided to use that to his advantage / fem chubby reader, oral (m! recieving) use of “puppy” he’s a little mean, but he calls you a good girl, so that makes up for it right :3

kaeya has a knack for pet names. he loves sweet, domestic names lime “honey” or “darling.” he loves the ones that make your heart flutter: “sweetheart, princess, darling” however, his favorite is “puppy.”

he says is drenched in a sickly sweet tone. he knows when the name rolls off the tip of his tongue, he can have you like putty in his hands. sure there’s other ways to get you so pliant, but kaeya loves seeing the cogs in your brain stop after hearing that one word.

he’s conditioned your pretty head to think of only one thing when he says that. he makes you think of all the long, hot nights you’ve spent with him. whether it be out by the lake, in the corners of the favonious hq’s basement, or his bed, kaeya will make you remember the way he had you trembling from his fingertips.

kaeya sometimes believes that he’s in his head about how horribly he has you wrapped around his finger, but he’s so wrong. he practically has you looking at him with heart eyes the moment he speaks to you. he chuckles at the image of imaginary fluffy ears that rest on your head twitching at the sound of his voice. a puppy— kaeya is convinced that is what you are. he’s right.

“come on, puppy. you can do a little more than that, can’t you?” kaeya’s condescending tone making your heart stop, forcing yourself to take more of him down your throat. you gag around his length that rests in your mouth, hand clutched onto his thigh. he smiles at the way you struggle, his hand a comforting weight on your head.

you’re trying, you really are. kaeya can see the determination in your actions as you try to be such a good girl for him. he practically shudders when the tip of his dick grazes the back of your throat. he throws his head back, groaning at the feeling. he allows himself the privilege of being as loud as he pleases. the comfort of his own home— his own study.

he feels your throat pulse around his dick, making his tip leak with more fluids. he lets out a shaky breath, relishing in the warmth of your mouth. “oh puppy,” he says, brows furrowed. he’s so close to cumming, and you feel the way his hips buck into your mouth to push himself to the end. you muster up the courage to take him even further. you push yourself closer to him, the tip of his dick now flush against the back of your throat.

you gag, hard. however, the grip kaeya has on your hair makes you unable to move. you hear him let out a strained moan, thick fluid streaming down you throat. he can’t help but keep you in that spot until his entire load is finished. once he feels himself calm down, he let’s go of your hair and gently pulls you off of him. he looks down at your flushed face, your lips swollen from kissing him so roughly earlier. your expression earns you a pat on the head, and a soft coo.

“what a good girl, aren’t ya, puppy?”

© ilyhaitanii - please do not repost, translate, or plagarize any of my content, and do not repost it to any other platforms

the floor is lava!

bsd boys + reader

*all of these are optional romantic/platonic, except for Kenji, who is strictly platonic*

wc : 0.7k

a/n : quick little fun post while I work on my other shit- was missin the bsd content <3

obey me ver. |

It was a quiet rainy day, and everyone was minding their own business (for once). Nothing could’ve possibly ruined the relaxing silence…

“THE FLOOR IS LAVA!” 

Armed Detective Agency 

Before you even have a chance to move, Dazai is jumping straight up, entire body weight and all four spangly limbs, right into your arms. Whether you can actually hold him up- or you both end up eating the floor - he’ll insist that you’re his knight in shining armor and you simply must hold him

Atsushi, on the other hand, will waste no time before swooping you off your feet, even if it means he has to stand in the ‘lava’ himself. He’d absolutely fucking sprint to you and grab you if he needed to because he is a gentleman 

And of course, to no one’s surprise, Ranpo was the one who shouted it. He already had his ass parked on top of his desk, snacks surrounding him- though he’ll make room for you to hop up if you hurry (and will share his snacks if you trip someone on their way to safety) 

In typical Kunikida fashion, he’s there to wave around his notebook and demand everyone quit playing games and get back to work. Even so, he’ll easily catch you when you jump at him, cause I mean..he wasn’t just gonna let you fall [in lava]

Fukuzawa doesn’t exactly understand, so he’ll stand and watch everyone else scramble around. He’ll also help you climb on top of a desk (with eyes crinkled at the corners in amusement)

Having never played before, Kenji will also just stand around until you grab his hand and pull him towards the couch. A quick ‘hurry!’ from you and he’s laughing and jumping on the cushions with you, listening intently when you explain the game 

Junichiro tries to climb on your chair with you, whining when you place your foot on his chest to stop him. Surprisingly, he’ll just pick you up quickly before sitting down in your spot, curling his arms around you with a huff while you guys try to keep balance on one another, keeping your feet off the ground 

Port Mafia 

Chuuya would like to say he’s all cool and suave about it, but the second he processes those words, he’s activating his ability and floating over to grab you up off the floor too. He’ll hold you over his shoulder so the two of you can throw shit at everyone else scrambling around (while hovering mockingly above their heads) 

As usual, Akutagawa is stoned face while he remains unmoving from his seat. He’ll only blink when you hop on his lap, begrudgingly choosing to entertain your antics when you insist he pull his feet off the floor. And while he isn’t necessarily playing, he will knock others off their high spots with Rashomon 

Amusing as it is, Mori has no desire to participate himself. Elise is absolutely playing (as she’s the one who shouted it), so she’ll quickly shove him off his seat and beckon you over to come sit with her. He’ll pout as you laugh, not necessarily liking that he’s the only one remaining on the floor 

Tachihara is shoving you out of the way, no fucks given, because damnit- the floor is lava! Though if you stay where he pushed you, arms crossed and fake upset expression, he’ll reach out and drag you on the crate with him

Decay of Angels 

Fyodor will simply raise an eyebrow, looking up from his book to watch everyone fumble over themselves. When you attach yourself to the back of his chair, though, he chuckles in amusement and invests his entire attention to watching you bat away Nikolai from pushing you into the ‘lava’. He’ll offer up his seat after a while if you’re still playing 

[After being told what the game is beforehand] Sigma, still a bit hesitant, will tug on your hand and ask if you wanna share the table with him. He’ll gladly watch everyone else as they play, but if you ask, he’s happy to help you sabotage them too 

Without question, Nikolai is the one who shouted it. He’ll eagerly shove a chair your way, placing his own a few feet beside it. Entirely ignoring the chaos he’s created, Nik now busies himself with going back and forth with you, trying to knock each other off your chairs- and he will use his ability to try and cheat