I Love Kanej, But I Was A Bit Angry At Inej For Her "I Want You Without Your Armour Or Not At All" Comment.

I love Kanej, but I was a bit angry at Inej for her "I want you without your armour or not at all" comment.

Kaz, the bastard of the Barrel, who always kept a distance to anyone, admits that he wants and needs Inej and she pushes him to go beyond his bounderies. Most people liked this scene. I didn’t. What if it had been the other way around? If Inej kept thinking about the menagerie each time Kaz touches her and he keeps insisting that she lets him? Everybody would hate him for it. Consent is important, no matter if it is the man or the woman not ready to take a step, no matter if we are talking about sex or nonsexual intimicy.

Inej surely meant no harm, but she basically told Kaz that he can have a relationship to her terms or no relationship. That's not okay. Pressuring or persuading someone to take a step in a relationship they are not comfortable with is not okay. It's abuse. And Inej should be the last person to abuse someone in any way.

I'm trying to raise awareness for these kinds of abuse, where neither the abuser nor the abused realize that it is abuse. Like with my Ex boyfriend who kept touching my breasts and my arse in public, no matter how often I told him that this makes me ashamed. He told me this was unnormal and that I had to work on myself to be able to allow this. It was my first relationship and I was insecure, I questioned myself. Today I would tell him that it doesn't matter if my issues are normal or not. That no means no and it leaves no room for discussion.

I have touch aversion, too. Not as bad as Kaz, but it is an issue. I can accept touches from people I have a deep emotional connection to and I always have to see the touch coming. I experience people going over my bounderies without bad intention constantly. Just this week I had a painful dentist appointment and the dentist tried to calm me by petting my arm. I had to tell her again and again to stop doing this because it's making things worse. She did it kind of subconciously and didn’t realize that this was an act of violence to me. In situations like these I think about how Kaz must be feeling when the person he trusts most, maybe the only person he trusts completely, doesn't accept his bounderies.

I think Kaz is in a similar situation like I was with my Ex. Inej is his first love and he doesn't want to lose her. He wants to please her. But going over his bounderies isn't the right way I think. Slowly trying what he can do without feeling repulsed would be better (over-clothes touching, touching with gloves, touching hair instead of skin...). If this leads to him being able to enjoy skin to skin touches that's good. But if it doesn't it shouldn't be a reason to give up on the whole relationship.

One year ago, a show premiered that changed my life forever.

Because of it, I have found a series, a world, and a community that I know I will always have a place in.

It has become a comfort, a place of rest, and a source of confidence like no other.

Happy Birthday Lockwood and Co. The world is so much brighter with you in it.

Which sleep schedule?

Reblog if your sleep schedule is a mess.

Sure, Kaz is a terrifying and slightly insane killer but also he’s a teen who can’t confess to his crush, screwed up his own plan over and over, couldn’t believe that a parent would hate his own child and made a your mom joke on the guard in hellgate

I was thinking about how territorial Lucy is about Lockwood&Co and what if she was an actual dog....

Are you guys irritated when you’re reading a book in which the weather is completely different than the weather you currently have or is it just me?

I'm currently reading "Hollow Boy" in the Lockwood and Co series, where they have an especially cold winter, sitting on my balcony on a warm and sunny day. It just feels off.

Solutions I have thought of:

1. Change the book and choose one from my really big "want to read" pile in which the weather fits.

2. Read in front of the open fridge.

3. Read faster. There are two more books in the series. Is it spring in book 4?

4. Get therapy