Personally, We're Really Not Bothered By The Occasional Quip Of "men Are Trash" Or "I Hate Men" Or Whatever.

Personally, we're really not bothered by the occasional quip of "men are trash" or "I hate men" or whatever. We recognize that they come from a place of trauma and genuine expression of frustration. We fully believe people are allowed to express their pain in imperfect ways.

What we take issue with is repeated patterns of behavior in which men are treated as inherently more dangerous or untrustworthy than any other gender. Keep in mind, that this is different than pointing out common behaviors of misogyny from men, that stems from being raised in a patriarchal society.

I'm talking specifically about the rhetoric that posits that men are innately and irrevocably more violent or bigoted. This is gender esssntialism. This is what we are talking about when we bring up people who treat men badly on the basis of their gender. Treating real human beings as if their gender is just some curse that poisons their entire being.

This phenomenon overlaps very strongly with other forms of bigotry. Black men being treated as dangerous thugs - yes, because they're Black, but also specifically because they're Black men. Their masculinity is seen as violent and unsafe, and gender essentialism is weaponized against them more violently because of how it overlaps with racism.

When trans men come out, and are told that taking testosterone will make us angry, aggressive, and most importantly - ugly and infertile. When we experience corrective rape, have our life saving medications taken away from us. This is gender essentialism, overlapping with transphobia and misogyny. It's not just that we're transitioning, it's specifically that our masculinity is treated as more unsafe, more untrustworthy, more vile, because we're trans men.

And this does absolutely start with the way we treat cis men. Dehumanizing cis men on the basis of their gender, will inevitably lead to you dehumanizing marginalized men. You will contribute to the marginalization of men of color and trans men. You will actively contribute to racism and transphobia, because the oppression that we experience is intertwined with that same gender essentialism.

This is what intersectionality is. You cannot perpetuate gender essentialism and expect it not to have broader impacts on other marginalized groups. Because these forms of oppression intersect! They can't be separated from each other. You can't seperate the harm that Black men experience from the idea that men are inherently dangerous. You can't seperate the harm that trans men experience from the idea that testosterone makes you violent. Your ideas about men do not exist in a vacuum.

Transandrophobia goes beyond just being dismissive of trans men, it's this culture within the queer community where transmasc and afab enby experiences and culture are regularly hated and dismissed by the rest of the community. As well as the way any hint of female sex on someone who isn't a woman is hated. Not to mention the insane amount of transphobia + homophobia trans mlm face within the queer community.

Like just look at how every fandom (lemon demon, fnaf, TallyHall, Undertale, backrooms, etc.) gets hated and mocked by the internet the momment the fandom becomes majority afab trans people. I've seen this happen in real time, where fandoms go from being seen as cool and interesting, to being dismissed as weird and cringe, the momment thos shift happens.

Or the way transmasc and afab enby bodies are treated. The way transmascs are bullied for not having body types considered masculine. The searing hatred most people here seem to have for any afab trans person who isn't on T. The way passing is celebrated as a moral good. The way twink has been a polite way for some people to call trans men girls.

Transmascs and afab enbies deserve love and kindness. And they also deserve human respect. Please if your an afab trans person reading this: I love you, I respect you, you deserve to be respected, and treated as an adult able to make your own decisions, you deserve to have your body treated with respect regardless of appearance and for people to be normal about it.

Hey, If you genuinely believe in the idea that "all men are pigs" and we should "kill all men" you are a bad person, period.

Go ahead and call me misogynistic if you want. I genuinely hate you if you think the solution is the eradication of a group of people. Fuck you

I don't know what trans man need to hear this but you're allowed to be angry. It doesn't make you evil. You are allowed to experience all possible emotions without apology and still be a good man.

*this is about trans men specifically, do not derail. You are free to make your own post*

So let me get this straight, I've spent 26 years and counting being told that I'm disgusting and wrong for being trans and for being gay and I'm allowed to be hurt by that and to say that it's wrong. But when other queer people tell me I'm disgusting and wrong for being a man and for being attracted to men, I'm supposed to act like that somehow different and okay?

A Facebook friend posted, in all caps, "I DO NOT WANT MEN TO EVER TALK ABOUT ABORTION."

Ignoring all the cis men I know who are strong pro-choice advocates and who I respect for doing that work... this is blatantly erasing trans men.

Trans men have serious reproductive struggles that can be more challenging than those of cis women. Let's stop making blanket statements that men shouldn't talk about abortion, and start talking about how abortion affects men.