Villain Stephen: About That Flirt We Had Yesterday-

Villain Stephen: About that flirt we had yesterday-

Tony: You tried to kill me and I nearly managed to stab you, how the fuck's that a flirt?!

Stephen:

Tony:

Stephen: Anyways, what I wanted to say-

Tony, entering the Avengers Tower to see Steve mixing garlic, onions, tomato sauce, lemons, curry, apple juice and marmelade together: Okay, so what’s that supposed to be?

Steve: Well, I talked to Stephen some minutes ago

Steve: He stared me in the eyes very seriously

Steve: And after I had asked him what’s wrong, he told me I’d have to drink this or otherwise I’ll die because of a disease called... stultiae stevei. I mean, he’s a doctor, so-

Tony, rushing out of the tower: HONEY, WE HAVE TO TALK

Tony: AND I’M SURE STEVE’S NOT GOING TO DIE BECAUSE OF HIS OWN STUPIDNESS, THAT’S NOT EVEN A REAL DISEASE

Tony, stopping abruptly: ... or is it, though

Me, a confused nine year old, not being able to speak a single word in English, while listening to Shawn Mendes: “Okay, I get that ‘treat you better’ point, but who the fuck is Gen Norman?”

Source: @vanillabean_97 on Instagram 💕

Tony: Why is it frowned upon to call children assholes?

Stephen: I second that. Peter once deadass looked me in the eyes while he poured an entire liter of soda onto the floor after I told him he couldn’t get a puppy

Stephen: if that doesn’t make him a fucking asshole then I don’t know what does

Steve: When I was 7 I had this crush on a boy in my class and I didn’t know how to deal with it so I wrote him a letter that just said “get out of my class”

Bucky: Oh my god, that was you-?