PHONING... Carnival.

PHONING... 𓂃 ࣪˖ carnival.

Essentially becoming a shut-in due to your extreme fear of crowds, your friends are determined to take you out and show you how much fun things can be.

selected: [ beomgyu's song. ] replay? ✧

જ⁀➴♡ wc 1k ✧ fluff , humor , comfort

As you inch closer to the front of the line, the rhythmic clinking of the cars ascending and descending fills your ears.

Standing before the entrance, the worker looked at you expectantly before glancing at the boys behind you. You turned to face them and they all gave you an encouraging smile, each one as sweet as the one before.

“So, who’s it gonna be?”

Looking at each of them, it felt almost impossible to pick just one. The feeling that everyone was waiting on you made you even more anxious, the idea of annoying the people around you getting your nerves up even more.

“Hey, Y/N it’s fine. Take your time.” Taehyun commented.

The small smile he gave you was enough to have you letting out a sigh of relief. Beomgyu swayed back and forth on his heels, clapping his hands together.

“One, two…” he began counting down dramatically, motioning for you to hurry up as people behind him waited.

Shooting him an irritated glare, you reached over the chainlink and grabbed his hand. The action quickly made him stop and a wide satisfied grin made its’ way onto his face.

“Hah!” Beomgyu shoved the stick of cotton candy he had been holding in Yeonjun’s hand as the boy took it with a confused look before shrugging, taking a bite from it.

Stepping forward, the two of you step onto the gondola as the attendant begins to follow the safety measures.

“Hey, Y—”

“Gyu, if you start tweaking on this ride when we get up there I’m flinging you off and then myself.”

Beomgyu’s wide smile fell and he blinked slowly, hands clasped together. “Oh!”

With a lurch, the Ferris wheel began its slow ascent, the ground falling away beneath and butterflies beginning in your stomach.

“I wasn’t going to, what I was going to say before I was so rudely interrupted is that it’ll be fine. This is like, the second safest ride after the carousel and you did fine on that.”

The carnival buzzed with excitement below as the sounds blended with the lively atmosphere.

You let out a huff, turning toward him. “That’s a kid’s ride.”

“And so is this! Ta-da!”

“Right. Thanks, Beomgyu.”

The same mischievous grin never left his face and you found yourself more focused on him than the strange jumps in your heart.

Despite your nervousness, you couldn't help but laugh, grateful for Beomgyu’s lightheartedness.

It was obvious he was putting up his usual act to entertain you but you found yourself appreciating it as a nice distraction.

"Thanks for always making me laugh, at least.” you said, voice filled with gratitude as you swung your legs back and forth.

He noticed the motion and let out a sigh of relief, grateful that he had managed to calm you down enough that you were seeming more comfortable.

He flashed you a boyish grin, eyes sparkling. "Anything for you, Y/N~”

You cringed at the high pitched voice he put on as he puckered his lips towards you, shoving him away with a choked laugh.

The quick distraction seemed to lose your focus as the ferris wheel reached its peak and your nerves seemed to resurface.

Beomgyu was quick to notice and reached out, placing a hand under your chin and turning your face to him.

"Don't worry, Y/N. I'm right here with you," his voice was soft and comforting and you almost felt nauseous at how gentle he had been.

The whole time, even with getting swept up in the rush of the night, he always seemed to hold himself back for you when he knew you needed it.

“Yeah, right. You’re always here aren’t you?“

“Always for you, that’s why I’m your favorite.”

“Hm… are you?”

“Would I be here if I wasn’t?” His voice was teasing, although it sounded like a genuine question.

“I guess not.” It came out in a mumble, you not wanting to fully confess that he had been right.

“You’re always on my mind, that’s for sure.”

Hearing this, Beomgyu gave you a curious look before confidently grabbing your hand in his and holding it up in front of you. “All according to plan, then.”

This time it was your turn to give him a confused look, tilting your head to the side slightly. “What do you mean?”

He smiled, “I always want you to think about me. I want there to be some tiny particle of thought that always holds a piece of me, just like how you’re always on my mind.”

Every word was the truth— Beomgyu knew that the world wouldn’t end if you had slipped out of his life but he was sure it would stop turning entirely.

You had come to fit in his life like a recurring dream, unknowingly invading his every thought like he wished he could for you.

Even when only an arm's length away—it felt like you were somewhere else, in your own world entirely. He would reach out and touch you, only for his hand to come up empty.

You almost felt sick from how flushed you felt, eyes searching for any sign of a joke but only finding a look of pure sincerity. Any mischievous glint before had completely melted away.

“You think of me?” You asked, almost breathless.

“Obviously, I do. I love you.”

You felt a wave of warmth wash over you, all you could focus on was how breathtaking Beomgyu had looked.

In the moment there was no humor in his voice, just genuine affection. It would almost be alarming if you hadn’t known him as well as you did.

There wasn’t any need to question it, his love was always there just bubbling underneath the surface. Maybe he just expressed it in his own way.

“I do too.”

“Think of me, or love me?”

“Well both… obviously.” You said, mocking his tone from moments earlier.

Your heart was pounding in your chest at the admission as you noticed the way his gaze softened while he looked at you. A way you’d only seen in your daydreams.

As you rise higher and higher, the carnival below seemed to be drowned out even with how bustling it had been.

The sounds of laughter and music faded to the background and all you could focus on was the sound of the wind and the gentle creaking of the wheel as it turned.

Without hesitation, Beomgyu brought your hands held up between you to his mouth. You smiled, embarrassed as he placed a gentle kiss to your knuckles.

The cute moment didn’t last long before he gently bit down on your hand, causing you to jump and pull it away from him as he snickered.

“What is wrong with you?” The seat shook slightly due to you jumping and you found yourself quickly grabbing onto his arm, clinging onto him.

“Are you crazy?”

“Crazy over you~”

“…Yuck.” A quiet laugh left your lips, shortly followed by a deep breath as you calmed yourself for the final time.

Despite the fact that your seat had stopped shaking, your grip on his arm stayed the same.

The wheel began its descent as the two of you sat in a comfortable silence, the soft chiming music below slowly coming back into focus.

“Y/N?”

“Hm?”

“I hope that little by little, you find yourself thinking of me, until you wake up one morning and realize you can't think of anything else, because I’ll always be here.”

જ⁀➴♡ phone in ᝰ.ᐟ

PHONING... 𓂃 ࣪˖ songs for you.

With the encouragement from his friends to stop yapping and finally do something about his crush, Yeonjun enacts a multi-step plan to ensure you fall for him. Unfortunately, each incident seems to crash and burn.

જ⁀➴♡ wc 6k ✧ fluff , humor

The sun hung low in the sky, casting a warm golden glow over the manicured lawns and towering buildings of the university as you yawned.

Stepping out of your final class of the day, the campus buzzed with energy and activity around you. Despite the students rushing past you, your eyes stayed glued to your phone as you quickly texted your friends to let them know that you were done with your class.

Unknown to you, staggering behind was Yeonjun whose eyes stayed glued to you. Soobin seemed to notice his lack of animated responses and followed his line of sight, only to see you.

“Staring holes into the back of her head surely isn’t getting you anywhere.” Soobin said teasingly, nudging him.

The sound of Kai’s loud laughter caused Yeonjun to sink into himself as he shot the boy an annoyed look, quickly checking that you didn’t look over at the commotion.

Of course, you were too busy tied up in your own world and he let out a sigh of relief.

The conversation was punctuated by the ringing of bells signaling the end of classes. “Why don’t you just make a move already? You’re running out of time, at the pace you’re going someone else is gonna swoop in.” Beomgyu’s flat tone didn’t seem to match his interest in the topic as he tucked his phone into his pocket.

“It’s not like I haven’t tried, she’s just always busy.” Yeonjun scoffed as he brushed a strand of hair from his face.

“Really?” Soobin hummed, “I haven’t seen you talked to her once.”

Yeonjun straightened his back and let out a huff as he jumped to defend himself. “That’s not true, we talked at the student showcase!”

Soobin snickered, “Oh right. Was that when you spilled your Sprite on her?”

“Ai—”

In the distance, there was the faint strains of music drifting from a nearby quad, where a group of students has gathered to enjoy the late afternoon sun. Beomgyu tore his eyes away from the group as they had passed, chiming in.

“Oh, yeah! And then she missed collecting her prize money because she went to go clean herself up.”

Embarrassment was written all over his face as Yeonjun ran a hand down his face, refusing to think back on the memory.

“Okay. Not my proudest moment, clearly.”

“You don’t have that many proud moments anyways, so don’t worry about it.” Taehyun teased, placing a hand on his older friends’ shoulder.

Yeonjun groaned, shaking him off as the group made their way through the campus to the court.

Yeonjun thought of what the others said as his eyes scanned the walls of the buildings, adorned with posters advertising lectures, performances, and club meetings. Despite his lack of personal interest in these clubs, they seemed to give him a few ideas on how to get your attention.

Yeonjun stood at the free-throw line, ball in hand, heart pounding with a mix of nerves and excitement.

It wasn’t like Yeonjun was a sweat when it came to their games— they were always in good fun so he never worried too much about it but knowing that you were only a few feet away on the bleachers with your friends had him feeling much more competitive.

Yeonjun glanced over at you, his heart stopping when he caught your eyes with his. Glancing over out of curiosity, you found yourself a bit embarrassed with the sudden eye contact but you flashed him a quick supportive smile.

In all honesty, you didn’t know much about him aside from what you heard from everyone around you. Yeonjun was attractive, that much you could admit, but it was a bit difficult to approach him considering how highly everyone spoke of him.

The two of you shared quite a few mutual friends so you’d run into each other fairly often but you never found yourself particularly engaged in a conversation with him alone.

The one time that you had talked to him ended with you covered in sticky soda which was of course, much less than favorable.

Even still, the conversation before had been enjoyable enough as he told you how much he liked your art. Student showcases were a bit of a drag and you found them quite embarrassing but when you’d later found out that he had dragged the rest of his friends to see your display, it felt worth it.

From then on you’d regarded Yeonjun as attractive and kind.

The eye contact grew a bit uncomfortable as you nervously laughed, quickly turning back to face your friends who gave you a teasing smile.

“Well, anyways, I’m not sure if I’ll text him back. I mean it was really nice but I don’t think he’s really the type to want something serious, you know?”

Karina hummed as she twirled her hair around her finger. “Are you sure you’re not making an assumption? Maybe he can surprise you.” She offered and you bit the inside of your cheek.

Ningning laughed as she tangled a sour strip above Winter who tried to catch it with her mouth. Watching this, you found yourself laughing at her struggling from her position lying on the bleachers.

“Y/N’s impossibly high standards strike again,” Giselle says as she shakes you gently by your shoulder with a smile.

Sheepishly, you rubbed the back of your neck and whined. “Isn’t that a good thing? I don’t wanna be played by some dumb disingenuous guy, y’know?”

You used to think that falling in love was about holding on, but soon you found that it wasn’t. Meaningless conversations made your head spin and after one too many times, you’ve practically given up.

At the end of the day, you realized you may never realize what love truly was. Or maybe you’ve had it all wrong. There was always the possibility that someone could change your mind but you refused to hold your breath waiting for it.

Winter finally caught the sour rope in her mouth and bit down on it, tugging the rope as it slipped from a distracted Ningning’s grasp, slapping Winter in the face.

Ningning’s attention had been turned toward the court as she saw the familiar group of boys muttering and looking over.

Winter choked as she sat up straight, coughing as she blinked rapidly to get rid of sugar that had gotten into her eye. You let out a small laugh as you moved her flailing hands and wiped the remaining sugar off her face.

“What about Yeonjun?” Giselle offered and you gave her a confused look.

“What… about him?” Ningning looked at you and then back to Yeonjun’s three friends who were still starring.

In his own word Yeonjun focused on the hoop with a deep breath, visualizing the perfect arc of the ball as he got ready to shoot it through the air.

Suddenly, his confidence came crashing down as a familiar voice called out.

“Y/N! This one’s for you!”

Ningning and Winter both started laughing and you turned toward the court with a confused look to see Soobin waving his arms toward you to get your attention.

Yeonjun’s stance fell and he quickly turned toward Soobin, heart beating out of his chest.

“Hey— why the hell would you—?!”

Soobin snickered as he nudged Yeonjun back toward the starting point, “Sh! Hurry up!”

That nervousness creeped back up as Yeonjun prepared to take the shot. It certainly didn’t help that he could feel the weight of your gaze on him. Knowing you were watching seemed to put him in a rushed state and he wasted no time shooting.

With a flick of his wrist, he released the ball, sending it soaring towards the basket with all the confidence he could muster back up.

Unfortunately, as the ball left his fingertips, he realized with a sinking feeling that something was off and he made a mental note to choke Soobin out when they were out of your sight.

The ball veered off course, missing the mark by a wide margin and clattering off the backboard with a resounding thud.

Any childish hope of impressing you dashed in an instant and he refused to turn and face you as he turned completely the other way, eyes staring through the chain link fence and out at the lot beyond it.

Beomgyu pursed his lips as he attempted to stifle his laughter and Taehyun grit his teeth together.

“Oh, that’s not…”

Embarrassed, you buried your face into your hands with an audible groan not even having to look up to know that he missed the shot, Giselle’s laugh next to you was enough of an indicator.

Embarrassment flooded Yeonjun’s cheeks as he retrieved the ball, trying to shake off the disappointment and salvage what's left of his pride.

After his blank stare was torn away from the fence he attempted to laugh it off, making light of his missed shot as he prepared to try again.

Soobin stood awkwardly, long arms stuck to his sides as he laughed along with Yeonjun in an attempt to help soothe the tension. Kai looked up from his switch, seeing the glare behind Yeonjun’s eyes and laughed.

“You’re making it worse, hyung.”

“Well… she laughed?” Soobin offered.

“Her friends laughed, idiot.” Yeonjun countered.

Soobin couldn’t help but feel a twinge of regret at Yeonjun failing to live up to the expectations he'd set and he let out a long drawn sigh. “You’re helpless.”

Yeonjun swatted at him, “me?! You set me up!”

The two’s bickering fell on deaf ears as Taehyun swiped the ball from Yeonjun’s hands and looked back at your group of friends.

Your hands fell from your face and Taehyun noticed a shy smile playing on your lips as your friends gushed about Yeonjun’s embarrassing moment.

The kitchen was bathed in warm, golden light as Yeonjun stood cluelessly, Soobin eagerly gathering ingredients to bake cookies.

Soobin turned from the cabinet and gave Yeonjun an annoyed look, “are you gonna help?”

“I would if I knew what we were doing.” Yeonjun argued as he cautiously moved around the counter, leaning against it with his arms crossed.

Soobin puffed out his cheeks for a moment as he stilled, placing the flour on the counter. “Cookies. Brownies? No— cookies.”

“Cookies?”

“Do you want to get a date with her or not?”

Yeonjun paused for a moment before the realization washed over him and he gave Soobin a confused look. “Remember what happened last time you tried to help?”

Soobin blinked a few times before throwing the rest of the ingredients on the counter and put his hands up in defeat. “I give up.”

As he went to walk away Yeonjun rolled his eyes, grabbing his wrist to stop him. “No! Clean up your mess.”

“My mess?” Soobin asked, raising an eyebrow.

Yeonjun’s cheeks grew red and he groaned. Neither him or Soobin were particularly good at baking but the idea of trying seemed appealing, at least if it was for you.

The silence had Soobin chuckling and Yeonjun shook his head before turning back to the counter. “So… cookies.”

With a sense of determination, Yeonjun set to work, measuring out ingredients as Soobin preheated the oven.

Flour dusted the countertops, and the scent of vanilla extract lingered in the air, adding to the cozy atmosphere.

Occasionally, their community mates would wander in with curiosity or to fetch snacks for themselves. This was how Soobin found himself lost in conversation with Beomgyu as Yeonjun reached for the sugar and salt.

It was easy for him to find himself distracted as he imagined the look on your face when he gave you the cookies, hoping that they were to your liking.

Baking for someone was out of character for him and that much was obvious from how clumsy he was in the kitchen. It wasn’t that he was horrible but he certainly wasn’t the best, he much preferred to buy stuff rather than make it himself. Though he seemed convinced now that making them himself was the best way to make sure they were enough to showcase how he felt.

Unbeknownst to the distracted Yeonjun and Soobin, the granules cascading into the bowl weren’t the sweet, crystalline sugar he intended, but instead, the coarse, white grains of salt.

Oblivious to this mistake, Yeonjun continued to add ingredients, his mind consumed with other ideas to win you over and gain your attention in a more positive way.

With each stir of the spoon, the mixture began to take shape, the dough coming together in a smooth, glossy consistency. Yeonjun looked up at Soobin and Beomgyu who were locked into something the latter was showing on his phone as he scooped the dough onto the baking sheet, excitement building with each passing moment.

Yeonjun slid the tray into the oven as he excused himself for a few to go change, heart beating with excitement and the hope that you’ll savor the sweetness of his gesture.

Soobin agreed to wait for the cookies to finish as the older boy left, Beomgyu peeking into the oven with curiosity.

As the cookies baked, a faint scent wafted through the air. Beomgyu noted it wasn’t the enticing aroma of freshly baked treats, but instead, the unmistakable tang of salt.

“These for Kai or something?” Beomgyu asks, wondering if the boys were intending to pull a prank.

Confusion clouded Soobin’s mind as he furrowed his brow, unable to understand what he meant. “No? They’re for Y/N.”

Beomgyu’s mouth formed a quick ‘o’ as Soobin shoved him aside, pulling the tray from the oven. Yeonjun returned to see the golden-brown cookies on the counter and smiled.

“Nice! You want one Beomgyu?” The younger boy blinked for a moment, the other two’s obliviousness causing him to snicker as he shook his head.

“No, thanks.” Beomgyu reached behind Soobin, grabbing a bag of chips and waving them in front of the others as he quickly left with an amused look.

Soobin reached for a cookie and Yeonjun quickly smacked his hand away.

“No cookies for saboteurs.” He said firmly.

“Man…”

Of course, Yeonjun had considered giving them to you himself but unlike usual, he always found himself too tongue tied around you.

In the end, he decided to leave them at your seat during your last lecture. Even without sharing the class, your professor was quick to let him in due to her growing annoyance with his begging.

Not having much time to figure out the mystery of the cookies, you shoved them into your bag to investigate later. That was how you found yourself sat with your friends in a cafe nearby campus, cookies sat opened and untouched on the table.

Inside the small box was a scrap of paper that simply said ‘to Y/N, from Yeonjun! :)’

“Why would he make me… cookies?” You asked, head tilted slightly to the side in confusion.

“Seriously? You realize that he’s crazy obsessed with you right?” Jisung said with a look of amusement, swirling around the straw of his latte as he leaned into his hand. “You don’t know how many times Mark has complained about it.”

Chenle nodded, adjusting his sunglasses as he leaned back into his seat. “Right. Like, weirdly obsessed with you. It’s important to me that you know that, Y/N.” His voice was teasing and you rolled your eyes at his usual sarcasm.

You sat, staring down at the box of clumsily decorated cookies. Smiley faces and hearts messily drawn on them each made your chest flutter the slightest bit.

Unfortunately for you, the sweetness of the gesture was quickly overpowered by the complete confusion on your face when Jisung began coughing and spitting one of the cookies out. That was how you learned they were in fact, pact full of salt.

“Really? This is seeming like some weird joke…” your voice trailed off and Chenle snickered.

“Yeah, I just think he’s not very bright.”

Pausing for a moment, you nibbled on the straw between your teeth as you wondered if it really had been an accident rather than a joke. It was obvious that he put a bit of effort in, despite the ultimate failure the gesture had been.

Jisung rolled his eyes as he glared down at the box of cookies with a personal hatred burning in them. “What a waste of cookies…”

The library’s grand facade is bathed in the sunset as you tiredly make your way toward it to get some last minute studying in. Classes haven’t been very stressful as of late but you’ve found yourself growing increasingly distracted by a certain boy.

Multiple mishaps have led to him staying on your mind simply due to his strange behavior. Anytime you had thought about confronting him about it though, he seemed in a rush to get away from you.

Unknown to you, Yeonjun sat in the library with Beomgyu kicked back beside him loudly munching on a snack. Considering how the library attendant seemed to barely care about their job, the noise didn’t seem to be much of an issue at the moment.

“Why’re you so stressed? Just make the perfect playlist and write a charming one liner or something in the description— boom, Y/N falls in love with you and the two of you can make out for all of eternity.” He teased.

Yeonjun glared at him, shoving his feet off of the library desk. “Quiet down!” Beomgyu looked around to see the library was, as he expected, mostly barren. “As if it’s any kind of secret.”

“Whatever. And I’m not stressed, it’s just a playlist.” Beomgyu nodded, although it was clear from his expression that he didn’t believe him.

“Right. Considering how hopelessly in love with her you are, isn’t it weird that you don’t know her music taste?” Choosing to ignore the hard truth of his words, Yeonjun continued scrolling through his music library as he carefully selected each track.

Beomgyu noticed his meticulous attention to detail as Yeonjun scanned lyrics, taking out and adding songs as the moments passed by.

At the start he seemed to kick off strong, choosing songs that Beomgyu has heard in passing from Yeonjun’s own personal playlist from artists like Hanuel and Hojean.

The more he continued to try and curate the ‘perfect’ playlist though, his confidence in his own taste seemed to visibly wane as Beomgyu watched him replace his personal favorites with more popular songs.

Yeonjun chewed on his lip with his eyes narrowed, agonizing over whether each song was romantic enough or if it would resonate with you in the way he hoped.

It was when Beomgyu watched him replace 99% of the playlist with old Bruno Mars songs that he gave his older friend a deadpanned expression, deciding to take over.

“This is getting like… really corny, dude.”

In Yeonjun’s quest for perfection, he became paralyzed by indecision. The two spent hours of Beomgyu offering songs and Yeonjun agonizing over every choice, rearranging the playlist multiple times.

“There’s no hope for you. Just let me do it.” Beomgyu said with a sigh, hanging up his bag of chips as he and Yeonjun swapped seats.

Yeonjun watched in focus as Beomgyu added and deleted tracks, fighting the urge to comment on his choices and unable to shake the feeling that something is missing.

“There.” Beomgyu said after only a few moments, rolling out of the way for Yeonjun to look. “Take it or leave it. I’ve worked my magic.”

Yeonjun scrolled through for a few moments, thinking on it before beginning his edits.

Seeing this, Beomgyu groaned as his head dropped to the desk with a ‘thud’.

“Dude, it should not be this hard. You’re gonna stay single forever…” his muffled voice groaned.

“Shut up.” Yeonjun muttered.

After a few more moments, Yeonjun felt defeated. What should have been a quick and easy process was somehow becoming increasingly more complicated all because it was for you.

“Cigarettes after sex?” Your voice murmured quietly as you stared at the screen from behind Beomgyu, studying the tracks.

The title of the playlist had your heart stopping in your chest, only for the feeling to tighten as you read the description attached to it.

Yeonjun jumped at your voice and quickly snapped his laptop shut. Beomgyu rolled his head to the side, cheek pressed against the desk as he saw you leaning above him.

“Oh, hey Y/N.” His voice was tired and you looked down, giving him a small smile. “Hi, Gyu.”

There was a silence as Yeonjun stared at you like he had been caught doing something wrong and the small smile on your face stayed. “Hi, Yeonjun.”

Your voice was as sweet as ever and the close proximity had him feeling almost dizzy. Attempting to come to his senses, he cleared his throat and gave you his usual charming smile. “H-Hey, Y/N.”

Of course, his voice betrayed him and Beomgyu snickered.

Yeonjun kicked him underneath the desk and Beomgyu groaned, causing you to chuckle as you pulled away from them.

“Sorry for intruding, I came over to ask Beomgyu about something for photography but…” your voice trailed off for a moment as you pondered what to say next.

Yeonjun’s heart pounded in his chest as he wondered if you saw what he was making and if he needed to move across the globe out of embarrassment.

“Well anyway, it doesn’t matter.” You said, ultimately choosing to save Yeonjun from the embarrassment of calling out the playlists’ title.

“I’ll leave you two to it.” You said with a yawn, stretching as you stepped back. “Oh, bye Y/N.” Beomgyu said, voice uninterested and trailing off as he began to doze off against the table.

“Oh! By the way Yeonjun, you should send me one of your playlists sometime.” You said, a hint of playfulness in your voice as he gave you a dumbfounded look, muttering an incoherent goodbye.

Yeonjun stood in the flower shop, carefully selecting a bouquet of vibrant flowers, each bloom seemingly chosen with care and tied together with a delicate ribbon.

He hadn’t known if you’d pay much attention to detail or look into their meanings but he quickly found himself pulling out his phone with each option, making sure to look up the meaning of each specific flower just in case.

Yeonjun’s world almost seemed to shatter when he realized the yellow carnations in his hand were not, in fact, the best choice and they were quickly jammed back among the rest as he began to pace around.

Taehyun watched the ordeal from behind the counter and let out a sigh as he rang for assistance, his coworker clumsily poking his head out from the back in question.

“What’s up?” He asked.

Taehyun motioned toward Yeonjun, “my friend needs assistance. You mind tending up here for a bit?” He asked gently and the boy shook his head with a smile.

Knowing the front was taken care of, Taehyun made his way to Yeonjun with an amused look.

“You know when I told you to get her flowers, I didn’t mean come and tear up our displays.” He said half-heartedly.

“Right, you just meant come and make you more money.” Taehyun shrugged at that, knowing it was more-so a comment stemming from his frustrations.

Adjusting his glasses, Taehyun reached around and fixed up the bouquets that Yeonjun had messily discarded. Realizing the mess, he ran a hand through his hair.

“Sorry, Taehyun.”

Taehyun’s gaze lingered on Yeonjun as he shifted under it, kicking at the ground in frustration. It was obvious that Yeonjun had been stressing himself out over making the right choice.

Despite his friends knowing about his little crush on you, Taehyun had noticed how seriously he had been taking everything when it came to you and couldn’t help but feel that sincerity stemmed from something much more serious.

Adjusting his glasses, he smiled and shook his head at him. “Give me a few minutes in the back, okay? Don’t mess up the rest of our displays.” Taehyun mused teasingly.

Cluelessly, Yeonjun nodded and followed him to wait at the counter as he went to make him a personalized bouquet. With a sigh, Yeonjun felt a slight weight being lifted off of his shoulders as he trusted Taehyun’s choices.

With a nervous flutter in his stomach, Yeonjun approached you at the picnic table where you sat, his heart pounding with anticipation.

As he opened his mouth to get your attention, you looked up at him from your phone with a knowing smile. You’d found that lately you’ve become increasingly aware whenever he was around, even searching for him wherever you’d went subconsciously.

“Hi, Yeonjun.” You said, giving him an expectant look as your gaze traveled to the bouquet of flowers he held.

His grip on them was tight as opposed to the delicacy of the flowers and it made you smile as you held back a laugh.

A combination of blue and violet flowers were tied together by a pink ribbon, the colors complimenting each other and harmonizing well.

“Y/N,” he started before clearing his throat again. This was a habit he picked up when around you, you’d noticed.

“These uh… they’re for you!” He said awkwardly, presenting you them with a goofy smile. His lack of tact made you chuckle as you took them from him.

The silence that followed, though, had a sinking feeling form in the pit of his stomach as he watched your eyes begin to water.

Yeonjun’s expression became clouded with confusion and concern, “do you not like the color? I-I honestly know nothing about flowers so, you can just throw them out if you want! It’s really no big deal, I was just thinking of you so— or, I thought you’d like them. Not that I was randomly thinking of you. Or— not that I don’t think of you, but…”

Yeonjun’s voice trailed off with a nervous laugh, hoping his rambling would cheer you up and relieve you of whatever pressure he seemed to suddenly place on you.

Quickly, you shook your head with a small smile as the tears fell. As you opened your mouth to protest, your nose twitched as you suddenly let out a sneeze.

It's then that he realized with dawning horror that you were allergic to the flowers— the last, ‘fool proof’ gift he had hoped would win you over.

Yeonjun’s heart sinks as he watches you struggle to suppress a sneeze, filled with regret at his thoughtless mistake.

“Sorry, Y/N.” He stammered out, gently taking the flowers from you with a helpless feeling as he watched your discomfort.

Even with your wordless protests he wondered if his friends had been right and he really was clueless.

With anyone else, flirting seemed to come so easily but with you, he wanted his efforts to really mean something.

Quickly he realized that getting caught up in the things his friends thought were romantic gestures were just his own stupid way of ruining everything in the end.

Yeonjun’s cheeks burned with embarrassment as he realized the gravity of his error. Another romantic gesture overshadowed by the unintended consequences of his actions.

He wondered if his constant errors had been some warning of your future— a tell tale sign of truth that was meant to signal to him that all he would do is let you down.

Caught up in his own thoughts, Yeonjun was pulled out of them as you smiled through watery eyes, gratitude shining through despite the discomfort.

“That’s sweet, Yeonjun.” A nervous smile made its way onto his face as he rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly.

“You’re cute when you’re flustered.” You added on and he realized that maybe, the gesture hadn’t been a total failure in the end.

“You’re cute when you sneeze.” He added jokingly and you rolled your eyes.

“Don’t ruin the moment, Romeo. I can still accuse you of attempted assassination, you know.”

The flowers discarded on the ground, Yeonjun kneeled against the bench as the two of you talked for a few moments. A hint of a confession on the tip of his tongue before his phone went off suddenly, causing him to frown.

Regrettably he said his goodbye before rushing away to go help whoever had called for him, not without one last wave and charming smile.

When he turned back, the world beneath you kept spinning round and round like the plates in a circus act. Yet even with his new absence, you couldn’t leave Yeonjun behind.

No matter what kind of day you were having, he still scratched at the corner of your mind, like a cat begging to be let in.

The smile that creeped up on your face at the memory of him couldn’t be defeated. It was at that picnic table, hands covering the wide smile on your face that you had accepted defeat.

“Are you okay? You seem nervous lately.” Kai asked as he watched Yeonjun step onto his skateboard.

He pushed off with a confident stride, weaving through the concrete park with his eyes fixated on you from a distance.

Leaning against the concession stand, you chatted with your friend that Yeonjun couldn’t seem to remember the name of. Matty? Matthew?

His board caught on a rock he didn’t notice as he watched you laugh, eyes widening as he stumbled forward off of it. Kai followed his sight and clicked his tongue in acknowledgement.

“I’m trying to figure out how to tell Y/N how I feel.” He said as if it weren’t obvious to everyone around him. Despite that, Kai nodded.

“I mean— she seems open to talking to me now after the showcase incident so that’s good news, right?” Yeonjun’s tone was hopeful and Kai’s lips twitched up in a smile.

“Oh, actually…” Kai held the can in his hands away from him as the metal snapped, carbonation bubbling to the top. “I passed her and some of her friends in the quad the other day and she asked me for your number.”

Yeonjun practically threw himself onto the ground at that as he stumbled over his board once more, “she what?! Why didn’t you tell me?”

Kai laughed, shrugging. “Slipped my mind.” His voice was teasing, though and Yeonjun furrowed his eyebrows at that.

Sensing his apprehension, Kai sighed. “She asked me not to tell you.” He said simply.

“Well, you failed.” This time, Kai pouted at him.

“Whatever, you would have found out anyways. Hasn’t she texted you yet?”

“Well if she did, I would have known that you gave her my number, wouldn’t I?”

“Oh,” Kai paused before nodding. “Fair point.”

“I know that you want it to be special but why don’t you just try being yourself? You know, tell her how she makes you feel without overthinking it.” The younger boy offered, sliding his board back and forth with his foot as he took a break.

“It worked for everyone else you dated, somehow.” He added on with a cute tone as he reached forward, pinching him.

Yeonjun swatted his hand away from him and looked back to the concession stand. Leaning against it, you were facing his way this time as if you’d known he was there all along.

When your eyes met you gave him a kind smile, waving at the two of them. Kai waved back as Yeonjun froze and for the moment, he almost thought you were looking for him.

Yeonjun found himself light-headed with the same stupid determination and sudden desire to impress as he stepped onto his skateboard again.

As Yeonjun approached, he decided to show off a trick he and Kai had been practicing. It wasn’t anything too big, just a jump over the small obstacles littered around the park.

With a burst of speed, he launched himself into the air, heart pounding with anticipation. But just as he reached the peak of his jump, his foot slipped off the board, sending him tumbling to the ground in another display of clumsiness.

You gasped in surprise, eyes widening in concern as Kai grimaced, rushing over to help him. Matthew placed the snacks you’d bought on the counter next to you and cringed, “ouch. At least he tried?” He laughed before noticing your lips pressed into a firm frown.

“You should go check on him, Y/N. Make sure he didn’t break any bones or concuss himself?” He said teasingly as he turned, placing a cold can on ice tea on the counter next to your bottle of water.

A look of confusion played on your face and Matthew rolled his eyes, shoving the mess of items into your arms. You stuck out your tongue at him in annoyance before turning back toward Yeonjun.

The embarrassment could have been bearable if he hadn’t seen you walking directly toward him.

Yeonjun rarely felt embarrassed, he never felt like anything mattered enough to worry about in the grand scheme of things. Of course, this changed with you and that embarrassment became a part of his daily routine.

“The universe has got to be against you,” Kai said as he gave Yeonjun an empathetic look and the older boy just laughed it off.

At the end of the day, as embarrassing as that had been, you never seemed to shy away from his embarrassing displays before.

The crinkle of bags dropping next to him alerted Yeonjun of your presence as you kneeled down with a sympathetic smile, cold iced tea in hand.

Yeonjun’s hand that had been soothing his busted ankle fell and he gave you a toothy grin. “Y/N, what a… coincidence!”

You rolled your eyes at this, reaching out and pressing the can of cold iced tea against his red ankle. Yeonjun’s cheeks flushed at this and he looked up again to see you.

“Since your guardian angel is here, looks like it’s my cue to go.” Kai said with a teasing tone, shooting you a knowing smile. “Bye, Y/N~”

A laugh escaped you and you shook your head as Kai pushed himself off on his own board. Yeonjun’s constant effort to impress you lingered in your mind, each attempt seemingly more desperate than the last.

Despite these failed attempts though, Yeonjun became the one constant stuck in your mind. Before he started these grand displays, you found yourself dreading the idea of dating.

You couldn’t be sure what the reasons were for these attempts at first but after the first two, it had became obvious that he was interested in you.

It made you laugh at how determined he was to get your attention, almost like he had blinded himself, never seeming to realize that he had already gotten it.

The last thing you wanted was to get caught up with someone who was looking for a relationship for the wrong reasons. Countless times you found yourself jaded after failed talking stages.

Funnily enough, Yeonjun’s constant attempts to win your affection seemed to have you wrapped around his finger similarly to how he was around yours.

“At least you tried.” You said, echoeing Matthew’s teasing. Yeonjun’s wide grin never left as you moved from on your knees to sit down properly next to him.

His gaze followed you like an enamored kitten and you found yourself suddenly feeling shy under it. “You’re always there at my worst moments.” He said.

“Don’t worry, it’s always just as endearing.” You nudged him gently with your shoulder and he rolled his eyes this time.

“Let me take you on a date, then? I’ll make sure it’s one of your best.” This time, you were the one who grew embarrassed as he leaned in close.

His eyes peered up at you with curiosity as you tried to avoid his gaze. You gently pushed him away with a shy laugh and he grabbed your hand in his, holding it in its’ place against his cheek.

“I’m sure it will be since it’s with you.” And like what seemed like second nature after all this time, his breath caught in his throat. The wind blowing against the both of you left him unfazed compared to those words.

Overtime as he invaded your life, you found how perfectly he seemed to fit like a perfect piece of the puzzle.

Because of Yeonjun, you found yourself learning that love was about hands gripping the edge of the world and letting go, one finger at a time.

Each bated breath, holding it in before the drop came. It was unfamiliar and scary for your first time, but soon you’d get used to the motion; the headlong dive into the deep.

“Y/N,” he whispered your name like a prayer, his voice heavy with all the hope of heaven. Your hand remained still against his cheek only for a moment as his grip on it loosened.

Nervously, you pulled your hand from his against his face, only to take his in your own and gently lock your fingers together. His gaze never left your face as he memorized the patterns of your skin, your own eyes focused down at your hands.

Any anxieties from long before were let go as you thought about him and how recklessly he had thrown himself into it, all for you.

Unabashedly, you wanted to love like he did. So you decided to go with it.

Tracing the lines of his palm, you drew a map to salvation in your mind. After what felt like too long of meaningless encounters and empty promises it seemed that the world led you right to each other.

The last thing that you wanted was to fall for someone disingenuous and find yourself distraught over someone who wasn’t worth it.

Fortunately for you, Yeonjun seemed to hear the knock of your heart and answer it like his calling.

songs for Y/N. ♡

you only get one chance to fall in love with your heart still whole, thank you for making the fall that much sweeter. ;)

જ⁀➴♡ phone in ᝰ.ᐟ

PHONING... 𓂃 ࣪˖ carnival.

Essentially becoming a shut-in due to your extreme fear of crowds, your friends are determined to take you out and show you how much fun things can be.

જ⁀➴♡ wc 4k ✧ fluff , humor , comfort , txt ot5 x reader

The carnival bursted at the seams with life under the moonlit sky. If your eyes had lost focus for even a moment it would fade into a kaleidoscope of lights over the bustling crowd.

The ambience was almost overwhelming to you, someone who didn’t know the world could be so loud outside of the safety net of your headphones.

Amidst the laughter and music, your group of friends had somehow found you waiting by the entrance pathway awkwardly. And suddenly, the scent of cotton candy and popcorn became the backdrop for your exciting night.

You found yourself anxious for what the night would bring, unaware of just how excited they were as well.

You, who walked the earth freely without your feet ever truly touch the ground. To anyone who passed by it seemed as if you floated by with the wind.

Many hands would reach for you but you, who were completely unaware, remained unanchored.

Belonging to no one, to nothing, to nowhere. Existing only in a world of music, your own little world.

It seemed that you only awarded your attention to people who you thought truly deserved it, so when you had agreed to go to the carnival with the group of boys they’d been ecstatic.

It had been a shock, in all honesty. Not for a lack of interest: you had been friends with them all for a long while, but you weren’t too keen on loud blowout events such as these and instead shied away from them. Your willingness to try and enjoy the night with them had them feeling grateful.

Soobin and Taehyun had been the most understanding initially, preferring much quiet nights in themselves with their own tendency to get annoyed by the recklessness of those around them.

Beomgyu understood but he had brought it up a few times before you had agreed, insisting that he would win you all the prizes on the fairgrounds if you came.

Kai hadn’t pressured you about it all considering he wasn’t a fan of the rides himself, not really wanting to go at all but tagging along to win some new plushies for his collection.

Yeonjun had bugged you, much more often than he would ever admit, but he couldn’t help it seeing as he just needed his best friend to come or the night would have been ruined.

Considering your distaste for these kinds of overwhelming events, you were fairly hard for the boys to make plans with. They were almost always busy doing something so when they did try to spend time together, it was usually doing fun stuff like this.

When they met you though, they were quick to recognize you for what you really were— a free spirit, a wandering star. Hard to pin down.

Yeonjun’s arm fit right on your shoulder like he was made to be there. And Kai’s grip on your sleeve didn’t feel like any extra weight, it somehow felt like an extension of you.

Taehyun’s laugh had become your favorite sound, along with the company of Soobin and Beomgyu’s constant teasing and bickering.

You grew to love your friends, any and all parts of them— you were sure that you would love them always, no matter where you were scattered throughout the galaxy.

And you had showed them what it means to hold something you can never really hold on to, always managing to slip away just in time before their confessions could stumble out.

“Looking good, Y/N! For someone who didn’t want to come you look like you put some effort in for me.”

His arm found its’ home on your shoulder as always, shifting his weight onto your frame and you rolled your eyes.

“For us?” Taehyun emphasized, waving to the other boys who followed.

Yeonjun’s eyes left you as he looked back at them and pouted out his lips with an annoyed look. “Eh.”

Confused, you gently pulled his arm off of you and turned to face him fully, leaning against the fencepost you stood at.

“I didn’t do anything different, you’re delusional.”

“Ignore him, he’s teasing you.” Soobin said before flashing you a small smile, hands placed in his pockets. “You do look nice though, like usual.”

Maybe it was the endless chatter of the people around you or the fact that said people who were rushing past you could probably hear the heartfelt compliments that had you flustered.

“Ah… thank you.”

Beomgyu fake gagged, hitting Soobin’s shoulder. “You guys aren’t subtle at all…”

Kai nodded in agreement. “It’s making me sick and I haven’t even had any cotton candy yet.”

Yeonjun’s eyes widened and he quickly waved at Beomgyu, “Eh— yeah and no way you’re gonna!” It was almost like he immediately entered himself as a substitute for their parental figures in that moment.

You found yourself hiding behind your hand as you laughed at his bewildered facial expression.

“Remember the last time? You spewed that junk all over me, I went back home looking like a troll!”

The topic of food had your mind wandering for a moment as you felt your stomach growl. Memories of going to fairs with your family as a child had hit you as you remembered what you used to enjoy before you shut away.

“…I’m kind of craving fried dough, actually.”

Taehyun turned to you, “we should get snacks, then.”

About to accept his offer, you nodded only to be cut off by Kai.

“No way, games and rides first and snacks later.”

Soobin shrugged, “why don’t we just get snacks halfway through the rides?”

Yeonjun let out an annoyed huff at your lack of attention, “yeah, yeah… fine. Let’s go.”

The six of you began making your way in, the colors bursting to life like a technicolor dream. In your opinion, it was all too much but the vibrant tents and swirling rides did pique your interest.

Taehyun snickered from beside you, “worried Beomgyu’s gonna get into a cotton candy coma again, huh?”

Beomgyu almost seemed embarrassed by what he was talking about as he turned to you with an expression of what seemed like mock offense. “It was’t that bad!”

“Tell that to my hair...” Yeonjun grumbled, nudging Soobin to switch places with him at your side.

“Whatever, your hairs fried to hell anyways!” Beomgyu said in a teasing tone.

Soobin gave Yeonjun a smile and instead turned toward you next to him, causing him to pout.

“Hey, why don’t we test our luck at the ring toss?“

You thought about it for a moment, glancing over at the tent to inspect the rewards. “For what? A goldfish?”

He shrugged.

Seeming as you ultimately came up with nothing of value from that tent, you turned your attention to the one next to it and smiled.

“Look, there’s a huge penguin plush. Kai needs it!”

Kai perked up at the mention of himself and looked over to the tent, eyes widening a bit at the size of the prize you were looking at. Despite that, he laughed.

“What? No he doesn’t, he’s practically drowning in th—“ you rolled your eyes at Yeonjun’s arguing.

“Wow, Yeonjun… don’t you want to make Kai happy? What if that penguin plush is the final one he ever gets? What if a meteor hits us right now? And we all die, sad and alone with no penguin to accompany us at our bitter end.”

You moved in front of the group of boys and grabbed Kai’s hand to lead him toward the tent.

“He doesn’t need it, Y/N. There’s a difference between need and want—“

“Okay, mom.” Beomgyu snickered and Yeonjun’s cheeks heated up out of embarrassment. All he wanted was to spend time with you, not do whatever this was.

“I do. I need it, or I’m gonna die.” Kai said, playing along with you. “Sad and alone.”

Putting on a panicked tone, you jumped back and pulled Yeonjun forward, pushing him in front of you as you shoved him toward the booth.

“Yeonjun!! He’s gonna die! Hurry, hurry! To the basketball booth!”

“Yah— Hey! Stop shoving me! And stop being so morbid!”

Next to you, Kai leaned on Yeonjun as he let out a dramatic groan. “Ugh… Y/N I don’t think I have much longer…”

Your eyes widened, “oh, no! Kai?! Nurse!! Nurse—!!”

Finally giving into your shenanigans, Yeonjun couldn’t help but crack a smile as he pushed Kai off of his shoulder.

“Yeah, yeah. I get it. Just stop yapping, you’re gonna get us dragged to the medical tent before Beomgyu even overdoses.”

“I’m not overdosing this time!!” Beomgyu called out behind you three.

When the six of you reach the tent, you wait patiently for the other patrons to leave with their prizes before you stood, motioning for Yeonjun to go. “You’re not gonna try?” He asked.

You laughed, “yeah. No way. Never, actually. Never been good at sports, don’t even wanna try.”

“Y/N… the hoops right there. It’s not even that far of a distance.” Soobin said.

Shooting him a glare, you motioned toward the booth. “Fine then, you try.” He jutted out his lips for a moment as if in deep thought then shrugged, situating himself next to Yeonjun.

The carny handed them their first basketballs before activating the rig, the hoops suddenly moving across the board in front of them.

Kai shot you a look and you shrugged.

Yeonjun was fairly confident that he could get some in, considering that he was arguably the best out of them at basketball.

Even with Soobin’s height, he was sure he could beat him.

Unfortunately for Yeonjun, your cheers of encouragement found him a bit too determined to try hard and impress you and he completely missed each shot, losing to Soobin by one single goal.

One that only fell into the hoop because Yeonjun’s ball had hit it directly into it.

That definitely hurt his ego a bit.

“Ouch! Cringe shot…”

“Thanks, Beomgyu.”

“You’re welcome!”

“So… what was the strategy there? Just wild flinging?” Taehyun asked and Yeonjun just let out a nervous laugh. “I guess I’m just off my game today.”

“Well… guess I’ll die.” You giggled at this and turned to Kai, raising your fist. “We’ll get you one of them later, promise.” He smiled and bumped his fist with yours.

“Plus, it’s not Yeonjun’s fault. Soobin just has such good luck when it comes to games, right?” You asked, following behind them as they started to walk.

“Or I’m just the best!” Soobin called after.

The scent of fried delights and sugary treats was thick in the air once more, the smell of more savory things than sweet making you wonder if you were now approaching the actual food area.

The mechanical whirring of the rides had you raising your voice as you all talked, “what about that?” You called.

They followed your eyes to see a few game machines lined up, you making your way over there.

“She’s doing really well,” Taehyun said happily.

Yeonjun nodded. “She is, isn’t she?”

Standing in front of the carnival games "Whack-a-Mole Madness," you poked at the buttons before realizing you had to enter a quarter.

Embarrassingly enough, before you could scramble around in your bag, Taehyun had come up and inserted a coin for you. You smiled sheepishly and gave him a quick thank you as he nodded, moving to the machine next to you.

“I wanna try,” Beomgyu exclaimed, rushing to the machine on your other side. “Here.” Taehyun reached over you, handing Beomgyu a coin as he thanked him.

The three of you grabbed the foam mallet and the machine began to ding wildly, colors flashing as you were tasked with squashing pesky mechanical moles as they popped up randomly from their burrows.

It was fun for a few moments before you found yourself growing irrationally annoyed at the moles that you kept missing. “Teach them a lesson, Y/N!”

With each successful whack, lights flash, bells ring, and the mole retreats into hiding, only to pop up again in another spot. You were doing fairly well, or so you thought, until you turned to Taehyun to see him expertly wack each one back down with ease.

Your eyes widened a bit, “you’re so good at it?!”

He raised an eyebrow at you. “You think so? Here, I’ll help you—“ Taehyun put down the mallet on his machine as moles began to pop up all over, similarly to yours had while you’d been distracted.

Taehyun moved behind you but before he could grab your hands to show you, the two of you were distracted by a loud dinging sound.

Beomgyu threw the mallet down hard at the machine, whacking every single mole at a feverish speed. The dinging came as the time limit ended and he laughed loudly, throwing the mallet. “HAH! I WON!”

You laughed as he jumped back to the other boys, cheering as Soobin gave him a high five.

“Nice, Beomgyu!”

Satisfied with the bragging rights that come from being crowned the (unofficial) Whack-a-Mole champion of the carnival, Beomgyu kept the smile on his face as he dramatically spun on his heel to face you. “I think you know what this calls for.”

You raised an eyebrow at him but before you could ask, he cut you off. “Cotton candy.”

Yeonjun’s eyes widened, almost in horror. “Aw, man…”

Soobin snickered, “it was doomed to happen eventually.”

“Eh, whatever. His body, his choice. You’re gonna be the one giving him a piggy back ride when he complains about his stomach.”

“Nope. Not it. Kai.”

“What?! Why me?”

“Your piggy back rides are the best.” Soobin said in a matter of fact tone.

“So? Don’t sign me up for that.” Kai argued, though everyone was well aware that if anyone actually needed it, he wouldn’t hesitate to pick them up.

“I am a grown man.” Beomgyu said with a straight face.

“With the stomach issues of a teenage girl.” Taehyun added.

Soobin gently tapped you on the shoulder, causing you to turn toward him. The smile he gave you was so sweet, you almost lost your appetite for anything else. “You wanted fried dough, right? I’ll get you some,”

Growing a bit worried at your friends beginning to separate, you grabbed onto his sleeve. “You’re all going?”

He shook his head and laughed, ruffling your hair. “We’ll be back in a few.”

Scrunching your nose up in annoyance, you began to flatten it back down. Kai lingered back as they went off, not wanting to leave you alone.

Grateful for this, you grabbed his hand and gave him a small smile. He gave yours a squeeze in return.

The two of you trailed after the others just a bit to meet in the middle, stopping at a new game booth curiously.

Soon, the others returned to see you and Kai standing side by side, armed with water guns and a shared determination. The look on the two of your faces was priceless as Beomgyu took multiple pictures with an itchy trigger finger.

The two of you were too locked in, bursting as many balloons as possible before the clock eventually ran out.

The colorful balloons bobbing and swaying on the rotating platform, you were determined to make yourself up to the Carnival Gods.

You and Kai raced against each other, trying to outshoot and outscore the other.

When the bell signaled the end of it and the final balloon burst you happily threw the gun back onto the counter and cheered. The memories of your shared fun were cherished long after the last balloon had burst.

“Yeaaah, that’s it Y/N!” You didn’t have to turn to see it was Yeonjun who had always cheered for you. Suddenly you found yourself embarrassed by how freely you expressed your excitement.

Yeonjun stood munching on a churro with a panda plush in his hands that you assumed had been the reasoning for their prolonged return.

Soobin handed you the fried dough and you gave him a quick smile of appreciation before biting into it, the warmth elevating the taste in your mouth.

Turning back to the booth, the carny stood with an expectant look on her face and you felt your face heat up once again.

“Oh! S-Sorry! Um.. prizes, right.”

Your eyes scanned them all, unfortunately not finding the particular animal you were looking for. “Hm…”

“Molang!” Kai called out, pointing to exactly that. A single Molang plush tied up by the wire in the upper corner of the booth. “They’re trapped…” You said breathlessly before motioning towards it. “Yeah! Molang!”

She laughed, pulling out a stepping stool to untie it for you and handed you the giant Molang which immediately found its’ home in Kai’s arms.

The night went along like this, fairly smooth without many slip ups. The occasional bickering between members occurred as usual but it was all in a playful manner. You found yourself feeling eternally grateful that you had come out for this night with them.

Everywhere you looked, there were games of skill and chance, beckoning with promises of prizes and fleeting glory.

In a place where thrill-seekers and romantics alike lost themselves in the magic of the moment, swept away on a whirlwind of adrenaline and wonder: all they could do was focus on you.

It wasn’t as if the group didn’t know of their shared feelings for you, in fact it had become a common topic of conversation in the hangouts they all had in Yeonjun’s room.

They all liked you: that was obvious to everyone but you.

What was even more obvious, though, was the fact that they couldn’t all confess to you. That would be much too overwhelming and confusing so rather than doing that, they all agreed to stay friends with you until they got their own moment.

Even with their feelings for you, they refused to argue over you. Besides some small jealousies here and there, they still loved each other dearly and refused to let any feelings ruin their friendship with their brothers.

Finally, it was time for the rides.

Striding towards the towering roller coaster, a mix of excitement and nervous energy coursed through your veins.

Yeonjun must have noticed and he nudged you, “it’ll be okay.”

You wanted to believe that but seeing how he himself had nervously gulped, you gave him a deadpanned expression and hoped that the ground would open up and swallow you whole.

The line snaked its way through a maze of metal rails, each twist and turn bringing you closer to the heart-pounding thrill—or rather, the fear awaiting at the ride's entrance. The distant screams of riders echo through the air, heightening the adrenaline.

Soobin seemed to pick up on Yeonjun’s inability to comfort you and made his way over from his place beside the line.

“I can sit with you if you want, Y/N. That way you can hold onto me if it gets too much.

The thought of clinging to him, as embarrassing as it was, did seem comforting.

As if clinging to him would somehow keep you grounded hundreds of feet above the ground.

Considering Soobin wasn’t initially going to even get on the ride, you tilted your head slightly. “Are you sure?” He just nodded with that same smile. You found yourself admiring his teeth.

Eventually, it was your turn to climb aboard. Taking your seat in the streamlined car, you felt the unfamiliar click of the safety harness locking into place, securing the two of you for the adventure ahead.

“It’s really not all that scary,” it almost sounded like he was trying to convince himself now and you wanted to laugh.

“You’re already high off the ground so obviously it’s not much for you.”

He raised an eyebrow at you, shooting you a judgmental look. “I’m not that tall.”

You rolled your eyes, “sure.” Beomgyu reached from the car behind you, grabbing onto your shoulders which caused you to jump as you turned back to him.

Half expecting him to make a joke about the situation, something about the railway coming undone or something. Instead he gave you a gentle smile, similar to the one he would give you at the end of a long day. One filled with comfort.

“You got this.” And somehow, you believed him.

The attendants give a final thumbs-up, and with a jolt, the coaster lurched forward, leaving the platform behind. You instantly closed your eyes as you felt a rush of air hit your face and the butterflies overtook your stomach.

As the coaster began its ascent, the world fell away beneath you, the clatter of the tracks drowned out by the pounding of your heart.

“I cannot believe you guys got me on this damn thing.” Finally prying your eyes open, you turned to glare at Soobin finding him already shooting you that goofy smile with those irritatingly cute dimples.

“It’s not our fault you’d do anything for us!” He called out.

With each passing second, you climbed higher and higher, the anticipation building with every foot gained.

“Plus, who would want to miss this view?”

At the peak, you paused for a moment, suspended in mid-air, taking in the breathtaking view spread out before you.

And you wanted to argue back, tell him that you regretted getting on the ride and regretted coming altogether. But you couldn’t because as you looked down at all the neon lights flashing in the darkness and how beautifully they blended together, you realized he was right.

The sight was beautiful, but it was even more beautiful because you were seeing it with them.

The wind rushed past, tugging at your hair and clothes, as you braced yourself for the exhilarating descent.

And then, with a sudden plunge, you were off, hurtling down the steep drop at breakneck speed. Your screams quickly turned into laughs that mixed with the others.

The world blurred around you as the coaster twisted and turned, banking sharply around curves and rocketing through loops.

Despite your fear being overtaken by joy, you still found yourself clinging to Soobin’s arm as you laughed. His face held a strange look of pride and admiration for you— not that you had looked to notice.

The force of gravity had you both pinned you to your seats, adrenaline coursing through your veins as you surrendered yourself to the wild ride.

As the coaster finally screeched to a halt back at the station, you found yourself breathless and exhilarated, a wide grin plastered across your face.

The rush of adrenaline was still coursing through your veins as you and the others stepped off the ride, pumped up and ready to take on whatever thrills the carnival had to offer next.

Approaching the carousel, it greeted you all with the enchanting melody of its whimsical music. You found yourself drawn closer with each playful note.

It was certainly a step down from the roller coaster but you still insisted on going on it. They didn’t bother to argue, just glad you were enjoying yourself.

“This is like going on the zip line and then going straight to the teacups.” Beomgyu commented as you inspected the vibrant carousel horses, each one adorned with intricate details and bright colors.

“Don’t be a hater. I just want to admire their ‘timeless dance’.” You said jokingly as you pointed to them simply moving up and down.

“We can just make a ‘timeless dance’ by ourselves,” he argued, grabbing your hand and you shook your head, pushing him back from you gently with a laugh.

As you all stepped onto the platform, the air was heavy with the scent of freshly painted wood. You chose a random white horse, running your hand along its smooth surface and felt the cool, polished wood beneath your fingertips.

In truth, you mostly wanted to ride the carousel to admire the art of it. It’s true that you had a fear of these dramatic rides but this was the exception, it was something nice and sweet that reminded you of your childhood somehow. It felt nostalgic for all of you as you all climbed aboard.

With a graceful sweep of the floor as everyone lifted their feet to stabilize themselves, the carousel began to spin. The platform beneath your feet started to rotate, and you leaned your head on the pole you clung to, turning to Beomgyu.

“I think I might fall asleep on this thing.” He said.

“Thanks for coming, anyways.”

He paused for a moment at the sincerity in your voice, looking you over as you blinked anticipating his response. “Nah, no way I can sleep now.” He said simply.

“Not when you look at me like that.”

Pausing for a moment as his words hit you, you brushed it off with another laugh as you hid your face in your hands and turned forward to the others conversing as they rode.

Around and around you went, rising and falling in time with the music, the wind whipping past and you found yourself laughing.

The cheerful chime of the carousel's music box almost sounded like a symphony.

You caught glimpses of the carnival unfolding around you: children with sticky fingers were clutching oversized lollipops, couples stealing kisses beneath the twinkling lights, and families laughing and smiling as they shared the magic of the moment.

It made your heart swell as you came to realize exactly what you had been missing and how lucky you were to have friends to help you come out of your shell.

And then, all too soon, the carousel began to slow, bringing your ride to a gentle stop. Slightly disappointed, you furrowed your eyebrows together.

Beomgyu excitedly jumped down and held his hand up for you to grab as you climbed down.

In that moment, a sense of contentment washed over you, lingering like the fading strains of the carousel's music.

With a smile on your face and a skip in your step, you stepped back into the bustling carnival, carrying with you the memories of the ride.

You all stepped into the queue for the Ferris wheel, anticipation hanging thick in the air. The towering structure loomed above, spokes reaching for the sky, promising a bird's-eye view of all the chaos below.

Looking up, you found yourself growing as anxious as you were excited.

“Huh…?” While staring, you realized that the ferris wheel had only seated two people, like the roller coaster.

Unlike the roller coaster though, the seats were separated with quite a distance between each other, meaning that you and whoever you sat with would be alone.

For some reason, your heart jumped at this. The idea of being alone with someone so close.

“There’s only room for two people?” You asked, even though you knew the answer.

Taehyun laughed and nodded, “you didn’t know?”

Frowning, you shrugged. “I thought that maybe it would be one of those big ones that sat everyone…”

He shook his head, “sadly not.”

As you inch closer to the front of the line, the rhythmic clinking of the cars ascending and descending fills your ears.

Standing before the entrance, the worker looked at you expectantly before glancing at the boys behind you.

You turned to face them and they all gave you an encouraging smile, each one as sweet as the one before.

“So, who’s it gonna be?”

[Choice 1: Soobin.] ★ [Choice 2: Yeonjun.] [Choice 3: Beomgyu.] ★ [Choice 4: Taehyun.] [Choice 5: Kai.] ★ [Choice 6: None.]

જ⁀➴♡ phone in ᝰ.ᐟ

PHONING... 𓂃 ࣪˖ Pearl.

Vacation is reaching its end and you find yourself growing restless as you wonder if you’re ‘boy of the summer’ feels the same way as you do.

જ⁀➴♡ wc 6k ✧ fluff

"Hello? Did you hear anything I just said?"

You opened your eyes, the sun blaring in your face. Turning slightly, you recognize the familiar voice and match it to the face in front of you. Chaewon sat, snapping her fingers in your face.

“Sorry," you said. "What were you saying?"

You were sat between Chaewon and Yunjin on the beach, spread out lazily lounging around on beach towels.

The guys were out messing around in the water.

The sun blaring in your eyes wasn’t worth the hassle of trying to catch a glimpse.

Despite how early it had been in the hang out, you already felt yourself beginning to feel sun-sick. The hangover from the night before certainly didn’t help either.

It was eighty-seven degrees already, and it was just the after noon so you were sure that it would get even hotter as the hangout progressed.

When the summer vacation had started with your friends, you were already counting the days until it ended.

It wasn’t that you weren’t a fan of it, you definitely weren’t against the parties and the guys but you had your studies back at home that you wanted to get back to.

Now that the summer was ending, though, you wished that time would come to a slow.

“I said, what are you going to wear to Heeseung’s party?" Chaewon repeated.

She'd lined your towels up close, so that was like the two of you were on one big towel. Despite you arguing that she would block your sun, she simply winked at you.

She rolled onto her stomach to be face-to-face with you, placing your chin in her hands.

"I don't know," you said, shielding your eyes from the sun once again.

She had tiny sweat beads on her nose and she hummed for a moment as if in deep thought.

She said, "I'm going to wear that new sundress I bought with Kura at the outlet from the boardwalk."

You closed your eyes again, swallowing the dry lump in your throat. Since you were wearing sunglasses, she couldn't tell if your eyes were open or not anyway.

“Which one?"

"You know, the cute one with the pink ribbon that ties around the neck. I showed it to you, like, two days ago." Chaewon let out an impatient little sigh as you gave her a sheepish smile.

"Oh, yeah," you said but you could tell that she knew you still didn’t remember.

“You’re still thinking about him, aren’t you?” A familiar mischievous smirk grew on her face and you opened your eyes just to roll them.

“Is Kura coming to the party?” You asked, attempting to change the subject.

“Nope,” she said popping the ‘p’ sound. “Says she’s too busy for it.”

“Well, I don’t blame her. Last time she came she had to hold back Yuri’s hair… not a fun time.”

You hummed in response, recalling the night. Heeseung’s parties were mainly just an accumulation of all the random early 20 somethings visiting for the summer looking for free drinks, it wasn’t unusual for someone to have one too many.

“You know, Beomgyu is going to be there…” her voice trailed off into a whistle and you sent a glare her way, sitting up.

“I’m not thinking about him. Plus, Jake is the one who invited me. Wouldn’t it be rude if I hung out with another guy?”

Chaewon’s eyes trailed behind you, widening a bit before she shook her head and smiled at you again. “I’m sure Jake wouldn’t mind, he’s a dog anyways he wouldn’t care.”

“A dog? Nice, Chae.” You snickered, causing her to rapidly wave her hands in front of her in defense.

“I meant in a golden retriever way! If anything, he’d probably be happy for you.”

“Right…”

You started to say something else, something nice about the usual crowd you saw at the parties or even an excuse of being ‘too tired’ from the bonfire last night but suddenly felt ice-cold aluminum sticking to the back of your neck.

You let out a yelp as you quickly turned around, shooing away in whatever direction the cold can came from.

In turning, you came face-to-face with Yeonjun, crouched down next to you with a dripping Coke can in his hand, laughing his head off.

You glared at him, wiping off your neck. You were starting to get sick of him and his friends entirely considering how much they occupied your mind— and days in general.

“What the hell, Yeonjun?”

He was still laughing, which made you even more annoyed as you pushed yourself to stand up, shoving his shoulder.

“God, you're so immature."

"But you looked really hot," he protested. "I was trying to cool you off!”

Chaewon and Yunjin laughed at this, Yunjin turning fully to face the commotion.

“Nice one, Yeonjun. Very smooth.” Her voice was dripping with sarcasm and he flashed her a charming smile.

You didn't answer him, placing your hand on the back of your neck. Your jaw began to feel really tight, and you could feel all the other girls staring at you expectantly.

Yeonjun’s flirting was just a part of being his friend, after all. Everyone knew that it wasn’t necessarily targeted, though he did always say that you were his favorite to mess with so that could be debatable in your eyes.

And then Yeonjun’s smile slightly slipped away and he said, "Sorry. You want this Coke?"

You shook your head, and he shrugged before retreating back over to the water.

Yunjin shook her head, turning her attention back to the magazine she was flipping through. “Guys never learn…”

As she trailed off, you felt blood rush to your face out of embarrassment. Normally you would entertain his flirting, hell sometimes you were even the one to initiate it, but the past few days all you could focus on was him.

It was annoying, really. Yeonjun and you were always playful together but over this summer specifically, things seemed to change. Now all you wanted to do was talk to his friend but it seemed like he was ignoring you for some reason.

Still, your annoyance with his friend being taken out on him was less than fair and you knew it.

Being mean to Yeonjun was like being mean to a puppy. There was just no sense in it and you’d just feel bad afterwards. Too late, you tried to catch Yeonjun’s eye, but he didn't look back at you.

Chaewon sighed, “always tearing men apart. Aren’t you, Y/N?” She asked in a low voice.

You lay back down on your towel, this time face up hoping to hide the regret on your face.

You took a deep breath and let it out, slowly. The music from Kazuha’s phone was giving you a headache from the volume.

Chaewon leaned over and pushed up your sunglasses so she could see your eyes. She peered at you with concerned eyes. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah. It's just too hot out here." You wiped sweat off your forehead with the back of your arm.

"Don't be embarrassed. Yeonjun can't help being an idiot around you, he likes you."

"Yeonjun doesn't like me," you said, looking away from her.

It was obvious that you were trying to convince yourself.

Yeonjun did sort of like you, in the same way a boy likes his favorite toy. You were well aware of the fact that he liked you: you just wished he didn’t.

"Sure, he's totally into you. Just like Jongho, just like Shotaro. I still think you should give at least one of them a chance. It'll take your mind off of you-know-who."

You turned your head away from her and she said, "How about I do your makeup for the party tonight? I can use that cute pink glitter you liked last time!”

The idea of getting ready with Chaewon was comforting, even if you weren’t too keen on going anyways. “Sure.”

"What are you going to wear?"

You shrugged before noticing she had begun scrolling through her phone. Realizing that she hadn’t seen, you replied.

"I'm not sure."

Chaewon nodded, eyebrows knitted tightly together as if the decision was a crucial one.

"Well, you have to look cute because everybody's gonna be there," Chaewon said.

You had caught onto her emphasis of the word ‘everyone’ but decided not to comment on it.

"I'll come over early and we can get ready together." You nodded, closing your eyes once again with a deep sigh.

The bonfire casted a warm glow against the darkening sky, flickering flames dancing in the cool evening air.

You sat, Jisung’s arm draped around your shoulder as you downed another drink. Despite the close contact, everyone was well aware that the two of you weren’t together.

For the most part, everyone knew that you were single. You had made it very clear, despite your constant flirting that you weren’t looking for a relationship in the slightest— hell, usually when the summers would end you’d completely go ghost on everyone to return to your normal life.

What happens in Busan stays in Busan and all that nonsense.

Amidst the lively chatter and laughter, you had noticed a boy chatting with Yeonjun, silhouette illuminated by the fire's light as he fiddled with the a camera in his hands.

You’d seen him plenty of times before but never managed to talk to him by yourself, usually getting wrapped up in conversations with Yeonjun and his other friend, Kai.

Shrugging off Jisung’s shoulder you gave him a quick excuse, though he was too immersed in his conversation to even notice.

“Yeonjun! Who’s this?” You asked, stumbling a bit as you plopped yourself onto the log next to them.

Yeonjun’s eyes widened a bit at your suden appearance but he quickly eased into it, pulling his friend into him with a proud smile.

“Choi Beomgyu! Choi Beomgyu, this is Busan’s dear party girl, Y/N.”

“Beomgyu. Just Beomgyu.” The guy gave you a smile, though all you could focus on was his hair at the moment and how soft it looked.

“Not property of Busan, Yeonjun. I just come through sometimes…”

“Right. Y/N here is our summer storm.”

Beomgyu raised an eyebrow, “summer storm?”

“Every summer, returning to break boys hearts.” Suddenly, the idea of boasting about your reputation filled you with embarrassment.

You shook your head, letting out a forced laugh. “He’s joking! Obviously.”

“In other news, I haven’t seen you around much. Are you new here?” Beomgyu nodded.

“I guess you could say that. I usually come with Yeonjun and the others, just not big on the whole party scene.”

Yeonjun let out a dramatic wail, “poor guy stays in the vacation house the entire time. I tell him it’s no way to spend the summer but he never listens!”

The idea of spending the summer inside their vacation home did sound painfully dreadful— not that it was a bad home or anything, you’d been over a few times to hangout with Yeonjun and Soobin but it was fairly small to fit all four of them— or five now, you suppose.

The idea that there had been another guy with them the entire time that you never met made you the slightest bit annoyed at Yeonjun for not introducing you, especially considering how cute he was.

“I get it, a fellow introvert.” You said as Yeonjun gave you a bewildered look. “Fellow? You’re the least introverted person I know.”

Upon noticing the glare you gave him, Yeonjun’s mouth quickly reverted to his normal pout before he let out a hum of realization.

When people called you a chameleon, you always thought it was a bit funny. Although it was true in some ways with how you would change and shape yourself to match those around you.

The nickname didn’t bother you, though the scaled animal itself was less than appealing to be compared to.

“Regardless,” you started. “I can respect it. Sometimes it's nice to escape the chaos, you know?”

Beomgyu nodded before a small, playful smirk grew on his face, looking up at you. “Summer storms bring chaos wherever they go though, don’t they?”

The heat that you felt rush to your face had you clearing your throat before letting out an embarrassed laugh, reminding yourself to punch Yeonjun for calling you that later.

“R-Right…”

It must have been obvious that Beomgyu had you flustered because Yeonjun snickered before excusing himself, rushing back to the bonfire, probably to gossip about whatever was going on with the two of you with their friends.

“It's quieter over here, at least.” He said, taking a drink from the cup he was holding.

You wanted to ask what he was drinking but it seemed to just be water.

“Well, what's your story then? What do you do when you're not dodging party invitations?”

Beomgyu shrugs, tilting his head slightly. You notice how his hair frames his face so perfectly and again, you find yourself fighting the urge to brush it out of his face.

“Mostly just listen to or make music. And you?” Your eyes widened a bit at the idea of him making music.

Throughout your years visiting, you’d surely met hundreds of guys who claimed to be musicians.

Some were surely better than others but you couldn’t help but roll your eyes after the third time. Claiming to be a musician just felt like the oldest trick in the book now.

Despite this, you found yourself interested in Beomgyu’s music specifically as you shuffled closer slightly. As if it would somehow serve to let you know more about him.

“Oh, you know, the usual. Hanging out with friends, smoothies and açaí bowls… hitting up every party within a ten-mile radius and waking up with the worst headache ever thanks to Soobin’s mystery concoctions.“

Beomgyu gave you a look as if to ask if you were crazy, “I wouldn’t put anything in my body that Soobin makes. That’s your first mistake.”

A genuine laugh slipped and you shook your head, leaning in as you held eye contact with him. Unlike you expected him to, he didn’t seem to shy away from you.

Most strangely, you found that you couldn’t read him at all.

It stayed like that for a while.

“Let’s take a picture together! To preserve this memory. To new friends, right?”

“Sure. To new friends.”

That moment it felt as though the hands of time stood stilll; Beomgyu and his camera smile— a flash of something real.

Your heart fluttered at the click of the camera’s shutter, and that was it.

The two of you talked until the evening, agreeing to meet again once the sun came up.

You knew that you would be hungover and dreaded the idea of getting up early but decided to deal with it to spend more time with him.

And so you met up once more, traveling down the beach’s trail as the moon came out for awhile; the trail lights glowing warmly creating a halo around him.

He’d offer to take a photo and you’d gladly pose for him, grateful that he wanted to remember you.

With each click of the camera, the clock would pause and resume its ticking with your heart on the dial.

Beomgyu had agreed to come out to more parties for the promise of seeing you and you found yourself searching for him at every function.

The two of you began to emerge during each other’s off hours simply to connect as often as you could, summer’s clock ticking away.

There were a few whispers about you and your new ‘boy toy’ but you couldn’t find it in you to entertain them like all the times before.

Something about him grabbed you, genuinely, for the first time in years. Anytime you thought that you had nailed him down he seemed to surprise you again.

Your ‘Mr. Mysterious’ quickly became ‘Mr. Perfect’ in your mind and as embarrassing as it was, you found yourself checking your phone often for his texts.

Despite your seemingly contrasting personalities, you felt a genuine connection spark, conversations somehow flowing effortlessly.

And that’s how you found yourself completely overthinking everyday leading up to the end of summer.

The idea of going from talking to and seeing Beomgyu everyday to not at all was sickening to you.

Something you never worried about before, the mere idea of him forgetting about you made you nauseous.

Though, you were far too prideful to ever truly admit that to someone, it was fairly obvious to everyone around you with how your behavior had changed.

Rejecting any and all advances toward you, instead opting to look for that familiar head of brown hair and finding yourself waiting for him.

Impatient as always, you’d stand with your arms crossed tapping your feet in annoyance at the curious glances thrown your way but the second he would show up, the biggest smile would make its’ way onto your face as the world melted away.

You wondered if he himself had noticed that change or if he thought that was just how you were.

Saving yourself and your time for him, precious nights spent partying without a care in the world had turned into nights focusing only on him. Or alternatively, your nights being ruined when he didn’t show.

The rest of the summer seemed to fly by quickly, regardless of how agonizingly slow it felt waiting for him to make a move.

There were times when you were sure it would be it, quiet moments in the car before he had dropped you off at home. Your breath hitched as he looks at you from behind his glasses, only for him to smile and give you a ‘get home safe.’

That was the last night you had seen him, a week and a day ago. You would be embarrassed of how long you had been keeping count if you weren’t upset by it.

In the end though, you guessed that was what you got for waiting around for some guy.

“Y/N, you’re spacing out again.”

“Huh? Oh, sorry.” Kazuha laughed as she turned back to the mirror, applying her lip gloss.

“You know, even if Beomgyu doesn’t show up I’m sure Yeonjun will.”

“Beomgyu will show up!” Chaewon cheered, pausing for a moment while she applied your eyeliner.

She must have noticed that her voice came off much too certain as everyone in the room gave her a confused look.

She laughed nervously before continuing. “I-I mean… I asked Yeonjun and he said he was going, so…”

“Right.” Yunjin said, drawing it out as she straightened out her bangs.

“You said he hasn’t answered you in a while, right?” Eunchae asked from the doorway, shoveling spoonfuls of fruit loops into her mouth.

“Uh… yeah.” Your voice was quiet and it was obvious that you were embarrassed about it.

“Want me to send a pipe bomb to his house?” She asked, eyes cast down as she scooped up more cereal.

Chaewon paused to slowly turn to Eunchae who shrugged, causing you to laugh and relax the slightest bit.

“I don’t think blowing up Y/N’s boy of the week is good for the singles’ economy. Who knows, he might come back in the cycle.”

“I don’t care if he shows up, anyway.” Kazuha and Yunjin silently shared a knowingly glance.

Chaewon frowned, fixated on the glitter she was applying to your eyelid.

Eunchae smiled, dimples showing as she shook her head. “He totally got you, didn’t he?”

A part of you wanted to deny it, but the silence that fell over the room with soft music playing from the speakers was enough to tell you that there was no point anymore.

No matter how many times you’d argue, swinging like a pendulum between yes and no— you’d always reach the same conclusion.

You always wondered if the mind answered to the heart. The way it always conjured up things that weren’t there. The prizes he won for you at the boardwalk’s arcade and the way he held your hands in his as he tried to teach you to play some dumb shooting game.

You didn’t pay attention to the screen and he laughed with you focused on him being so close.

There was never a chance for you to try and change how you acted around him, he saw right through it.

Maybe that was the reason you found meaning behind everything he did when it came to you.

How he plagued your mind like a disease, invading your space like some irritating bug you couldn’t quite catch.

And you could never place what was so different about him compared to everyone else you had talked to. Something about being with him felt like being home, somehow.

So despite the growing irritation, you would wait until summer’s end.

Wanting the mirage knowing it will never be enough.

But your heart doesn’t have eyes and the mind cannot resist when it asks.

You sighed. “Maybe he did.”

The beach house party was already irritating to you once you arrived. The girls kept together as they all went to get drinks and you set off on your own.

And even though you swore it wasn’t to go find your pest of a guy friend that you may or may not have had a tiny crush on, it was obvious that no one believed you.

The party had been loud and crowded like all the ones before but now the mass amount of sweaty people just irked you and dancing seemed far less appealing.

Maybe you had finally gotten over the scene and preferred something much more down to earth and personal.

It made you sad in a way, but you chalked it up to the fact that things always change.

Only the golden sand stretching outside into the horizon provided comfort as you peered out to the waves through the pane of glass.

Torches outside lined the perimeter and flickering flames adding a warm glow to the gathering as a few stragglers hung outside.

The sliding glass doors blurred the boundaries between the inside and outside and you felt drawn to the deck, eventually giving up on searching for Beomgyu.

Considering he hadn’t been answering your messages anyways, you assumed he wouldn’t bother talking to you even if he was there.

“Y/N!” A familiar voice called for you and before you could turn, a heavy arm found its way around your shoulder as the guy practically dropped into your lap.

“…Soobin?” You gave him a confused look. The two of you had talked tons of times but you wouldn’t consider you particularly close.

He also wasn’t one to play into your usual flirting so for him to, quite literally, throw himself at you was strange.

“Yeah, yeah!”

“Are you… okay?” There wasn’t much concern in your voice. After all, you’d seen Soobin drink a fair amount of times and he seemed to handle the morning after well enough so you figured he’d be fine.

“Yeah! Yeah, I was looking for you.”

“For me?” Now, there was a bit of concern in your voice. A small part of you nagged at you for being so selfish but you brushed it to the back of your mind.

“Yeahhh…”

“Why?”

He hummed, raising an eyebrow at you with puffed out cheeks. As cute as he was, you were already beginning to feel a little annoyed.

Curse you for being sober.

Gently, you reached out, pinching his cheeks where his dimples were. “Spit it out?”

“Oh! Yeahh, Beomgyu’s looking for you.” At this, your eyes seemed to light up and betray you as Soobin’s smile grew even wider, taking notice.

The deck was adorned with string lights and colorful lanterns that must have begun blurring together for Soobin as he squeezed his eyes shut for a moment.

Knowing the feeling all too well, you let out a sigh. “Stay here, I’ll get you some water.”

Standing up, you gently pushed him off of you and he frowned.

“What about Beomgyu?” His voice called over to your retreating form.

You let out a huff as you waved a hand back towards him dismissively. “What about him!”

As you made your way back inside, lounge furniture was scattered throughout as guests were spread all over.

A makeshift bar was set up in one corner, stocked with an array of cocktails and chilled beverages. When you reached the table, grabbing a cup and sharply turning to make your way to the kitchen a body suddenly blocked you.

“Y/N!” Looking up, you sighed with relief.

“Jake, hi.”

“You’re not drinking?” He asked, motioning to the empty cup in your hand as he held his between his lips.

Ignoring the way he had asked as if he was genuinely shocked at the idea, you shook your head.

“Maybe later. Right now I’m getting water for a completely wasted Soobin.” Jake nodded, gently guiding you by your arm to move behind him as someone shoved the two of you.

He gave them a glare before returning to you with kind eyes. “Don’t let me stop you then. I just wanted to let you know that Beomgyu’s been looking for you.”

It was almost like the mention of his name alone gave you a headache with the way you audibly groaned.

“Thanks, Jake.” You said with a thin smile, pushing past him as he gave you a confused look.

Finally reaching the kitchen after a few minutes that felt like ages, you filled the cup with ice and water before returning to Soobin.

Stepping through the glass door once more, you saw the all too familiar back of a head.

“Beomgyu,” You started.

“Hey, Y—”

“Y/N!” Soobin cheered, pulling Beomgyu in close to him and pointing. “Y/N’s here! You were looking for her and now you’re here. Both— you’re both here. My favorite couples here!”

“Not a couple.” The two of you said in unison.

Even though you had said it as well, you couldn’t help but feel upset by how quick he responded. How hypocritical.

Soobin looked between the two of you before groaning, taking the cup out of your hands and downing it.

“AH— Ice water? Are you trying to kill me?”

You shrugged, sitting on the opposite side of Soobin from Beomgyu.

“I was hoping the cold would shock your nervous system back to normal and factory reset you or something.”

Soobin paused for a minute before nodding. “Very smart. I admire woman in stem.”

“Don’t you mean women?” Beomgyu asked, amused.

Soobin just shook his head.

“Why did you drink so much anyway?” You asked.

It wasn’t like Soobin was a prude when it came to drinking but more often than not, him and Kai were the sober ones of their friend group. At least, unless they were celebrating something.

“Wowww, I am so glad you asked.” Soobin motioned from you to Beomgyu, leaning back slightly.

“Take it away.” He said, only for Beomgyu to shoot him a look that you couldn’t exactly read.

Soobin deadpanned at the silence before letting out a huff, pushing himself up clumsily and stretching. “I am.. celebrating!” He raised his arms up for only a moment before they dropped to his sides.

“You,” he started pointing at Beomgyu. “Do the thing. I’m outta here.”

With that, he stumbled away to go find Kai. You furrowed your eyebrows at the fact that he had basically just thrown you to the wolves but decided to chalk it up to the fact that he was inebriated.

“So…” Beomgyu began to trail off and you huffed, arms wrapping around yourself for comfort.

If he had asked, you were just cold.

“You haven’t answered me in a week. That’s kind of a dick move— actually, no. Not kind of. It is a dick move. You’re a dick, Beomgyu.”

Beomgyu let out an exasperated sigh and you opened your mouth to berate him before he nodded.

“Yeah, you’re right.” Expecting him to argue back, his lack of defense made your annoyed expression morph into one of confusion.

“…Huh.”

“I was a dick,” he started. “I should have answered you, there’s no reason for me to not have. I think I just needed some time to myself after getting burnt out from going out so often and I got caught up in my own world. I’m sorry.”

His response was clear and communicative and you found yourself feeling embarrassed for trying to start an argument. Because he wasn’t like any other guy you had talked to and you seemed to forget that.

“I’m sorry for being rude.” He shook his head and smiled.

“You just missed me, right? You have a reason to be hurt.”

The familiar feeling of your chest tightening made you clear your throat. “As if…”

Beomgyu laughed. “Alright. You missed my camera, then?” He asked, holding up the camera he had in his lap.

You hadn’t even noticed it throughout Soobin’s antics but now that it was in front of you, your eyes became fixated on it.

“Maybe just you.” You muttered, putting your hand over his and pushing the camera back to his lap gently.

“Knew it.”

“Don’t get cocky.” You said with a huff, finally meeting his eyes, not even realizing that he moved closer in Soobin’s absence.

“I couldn’t. Never with you. You keep me humble.”

With him sitting in front of you, eyes as warm as always you found him only confirming what you were afraid of.

You didn’t just love Beomgyu, you were in love with him.

“I think I hated being away from you more than anything. Like, ever.” Beomgyu paused for a moment before nodding.

“Me too.”

You shook your head, “well it didn’t seem like it.”

“I think missing you was easier for me because of all the pictures of you I have.“ Your breath almost caught in your throat at the comment, imagining him hanging up the photos he had taken on each of your outings in his room like precious memories.

“I forgot that just because I got to see you everyday, that didn’t mean you could see me. Sorry, Y/N.”

And it was true. Despite your bugging Beomgyu much preferred to be behind a camera than in front of it and you didn’t want to bother him so eventually you had stopped asking.

All you had was one shaky photo of Beomgyu next to your drunk self, both of you giving a thumbs up. An embarrassing photo that you would rather take to your grave than make your lockscreen for all to see.

“You better make it up to me. Summer’s already ending, you know…” your voice trailed off and he could sense the hurt behind your words as you pulled your knees closer to your chest.

Despite the loud music from inside and the few stray party goers outside with you both, the moment felt way too intimate for your liking.

“You’re right. We’ll just have to make the most of it, right?”

Another annoyed sigh came from you and you turned, cheek pressed against your knee as you glared up at him.

“So, you excited to get back home to your girlfriend?” Beomgyu raised an eyebrow at you.

“My… girlfriend? Y/N, I don’t have a girlfriend.”

You groaned, “then why haven’t you asked me?”

Your voice was barely above a whisper and you were sure that he didn’t even hear you. Before you could try and backtrack, he chuckled.

“God, you’re impatient aren’t you?” Straightening back up, you gawked at him.

“Me?! Impatient? I’ve been waiting, like, all summer!”

“I meant right now,” he said mindlessly combing through his camera’s gallery.

Eventually he stopped, turning it to you. On the small screen, fuzzy and dark was the photo of the two of you that first night you had met only illuminated by the fire nearby.

Before you could ask him why he was showing you that, he cut you off.

“I had to ask Yeonjun beforehand. Since I’m such a good friend.” His voice was teasing as you rolled your eyes.

“And before you deny him liking you, I already know that he did.” You reminded yourself to curse at yourself later for being so predictable.

“Anyway, he was cool about it so I just had to think over how I wanted to tell you how I felt.”

“How you felt?”

“Isn’t it obvious?”

“I think the best ways for me to communicate are through music and pictures, so I wanted to do something with those.” He let out an irritated huff before gently handing you his camera, your eyes still fixated on the photo of you both.

Shuffling through his side bag, he pulled out a folder. It was a normal white folder but on it was small doodles of bears and other animals. It was cutesy, not what you were expecting, but cute.

“But, I don’t have access to any of my recording stuff here so I figured the pictures would have to do.”

You hesitated for a moment to open the folder before he nudged you. Gently, you opened it up and slid out the photos. They were physical prints of all the photos he had taken of you and the one you had taken together.

“I think that the best pictures are ones we take of the people we love.” He said, voice a bit quieter than before as if not to scare you.

The kindness in his words hit you and the weight held behind them made you almost want to cry as you were reminded all over again.

You loved Beomgyu.

And you almost wished that you never did because loving him was like being ten years old again, scaling a tree with your eyes bright and skyward as the sun shined down on you, wanting only to get higher and higher, without a thought of how you would get back down.

Because the comfort in knowing he would be there to catch you if you fell was worlds more painful than the idea of falling at all.

Falling into the realization that if you were to lose him and the summer, a whole universe would go along with him.

In changing yourself for every guy that you’d talked to, entering stages for some momentary fun only to leave in the morning and forget once summer ended, you picture all your other selves, standing in line like a row of dominoes; separate but part of the same disjointed whole.

None of them felt like you, not anymore. Not when he saw right through you like this.

Yet, how could you hold a single one accountable when all you wanted was to be loved?

The realization for Beomgyu had come much too soon for his liking. Almost as if he had fallen face first into love, simultaneously knocking the air out of him while helping him see things much clearer.

How much easier it got for him to imagine you as a young girl. To think about your worn-out heart, breaking for the things you couldn't hold on to such as childhood pets and toys. The wish that he had met you sooner, if only to love you for longer.

The moment that the realization had come, the flash had hit you as he stared at you through the view finder. Your prettiest smile through his lens, he could somehow taste the salt of the sea when you both were miles inland.

Whenever you were together, the ocean felt like a fractured memory of when you had first met.

Your reputation never mattered to him, everyone had something they were known for. Who you were in front of his camera: he believed in that version of you. He loved that version of you.

He loved you.

And in the moments where you would slip, showing some sign of sincerity with your soft spoken words and your gentle glances, he had always known.

How you threw yourself blindly at the world and its people, hoping that it would always open its arms up to you and find you a home.

You weren’t some disastrous storm wreaking havoc— he found a pearl a much more suitable comparison. Like the ones you would look for on every beach, the place you felt most at home.

A pearl. Soft and sensitive to the world around it, yet as beautiful as the ocean it made its’ home.

જ⁀➴♡ phone in ᝰ.ᐟ

PHONING... 𓂃 ࣪˖ ID: P1HARMONY

genre key : (o) one-shot . fluff (f) . angst (a) . humor (h) . comfort (c) . (s) series . + personal favorites (♡)

CALLER ID: P1HARMONY.

✧ wip.

CALLER ID: choi taeyang.

✧ eternal sunshine (a) (f) (s) [WIP]

CALLER ID: yoon keeho.

✧ True romance. (f) (h) (s) [WIP]

CALLER ID: choi jiung.

✧ cool with you. (f) (h) (s) [WIP]

CALLER ID: hwang intak.

✧ In Bloom. (f) (h) (s) [WIP]

CALLER ID: haku shota.

✧ Slick Spider..? (f) (h) (s) (♡) [WIP]

CALLER ID: kim jongseob.

✧ 36 Flavors! (f) (h) (s) [WIP]

જ⁀➴♡ phone in ᝰ.ᐟ

PHONING... 𓂃 ࣪˖ huge hearts and 52-hertz.

Regretting what had led you to this point in your life: you reach out to the one person you know would understand you and what you’d lost.

જ⁀➴♡ wc 4k ✧ angst , fluff , choi soobin x reader

There was a split second before the feeling caught the memory— a small haven of neutrality that was quickly followed by a headlong crash into recognition.

The crashing of the waves in front of you served as some sort of comfort, the moonlight bouncing off of the waters simultaneously reflecting the light in your heart as you waited anxiously with bated breath.

The light of hope that he would come to see you, despite the severed ties.

Your mind pulls him to the foreground like a snapped rubber band and you find yourself combing through all the memories you could gather as if they were slipping through your fingers with the passage of time.

And you think of the line he drew in the sand, both figuratively and literally.

The first time you had walked the beach together, there were things written in the sand. Things that you’ve since forgotten over the years but the memory of how your heart seemed to jump never wavered.

Now there was a line drawn that you can't seem to put a foot past, no matter how hard your mind tells you to fight against it.

Instead, you sat on the same beach you shared many memories on prior and found yourself tracing hearts in the sand yourself, only for them to be washed away by the waves that brush against your feet.

The night was just as cold as the water and you shivered slightly, pulling your knees closer to you. After the hearts were washed away for the third time, you decided to give up on them.

Did you ever give up on him? If you did, surely you wouldn’t be sitting where you were.

That line he drew like a tripwire, you found yourself afraid of the damage but you knew you couldn’t keep standing still as you watched the distance between you grow further and further.

The urgency in your voice must have been hard for him to miss because it wasn’t long until you heard the shuffle of footsteps in the sand and felt it being kicked up behind you.

The air was tense but you didn’t need to question who it was because the warmth of his heavy coat being placed on your shoulders and his familiar scent was answer enough.

And the world falls away and you're exactly where you were on the last night you saw him, when he had his hands in your hair and his chin on top of your head as he hugged you and he never said a word about leaving.

The silence then was much more comfortable than it is now.

“It’s a little late for a walk on the beach.” Finally breaking the silence, you didn’t bother to look as he sat down next to you. The distance between you felt excruciatingly farther than it had ever been before.

“Haha,” your voice was laced with sarcasm yet he still gave you a tight lipped smile.

It took everything in you to claw against the instinct to turn and look at him, knowing that the tenderness in his eyes alone would bring you to tears.

“You look different,” his awkward attempt to break the silence made you laugh and you rolled your eyes.

You knew that Soobin wasn’t usually one for emotional talks so his presence alone was enough to warm your heart.

It wasn’t that he didn’t feel things, but he preferred to stick to his own devices when dealing with his emotions.

He was very unlike you. Maybe that’s why things ended up how they did.

“You look pretty.” You were quick to swallow the lump in your throat and take in a deep breath, that familiar jump in your heart seemed to take the helm.

“How have you been?” Your voice came out quiet and defeated, for the first time in months, Soobin couldn’t pretend that he didn’t understand why.

It was difficult to be in a relationship and watch your partner go further and further in their own life while you felt stuck. The fact that time could never slow down for you— never afford you one moment of peace together where you didn’t have to worry about falling behind.

His heart broke for you.

“I’ve been… alright. Schedules keep me busy.” It seemed like he was proceeding with caution, almost as if he was scared his words would break you.

You laughed.

“You don’t have to hold back, I’m fine. I can afford to be sad without wanting to end it all, you know?”

The sigh of relief he let out didn’t slip past you and you shook your head, looking down at the sand. Stuck together through the wetness of the water but ultimately, it would be torn apart and washed away regardless.

“I’m glad.. you’re okay. I’m fine, too. I was just worried about you. We haven’t talked in a while and it’s really late to be out at night. You should be more careful.”

Finally you found it in you to face him. Before you could open your mouth, he continued.

“It’s not your fault we haven’t spoken. It’s mine.”

Your mouth closed and you furrowed your eyebrows together in confusion.

He wasn’t necessarily wrong, you had even felt that way once you realized he had begun to distance himself. There was never once a moment in your mind that you could find to excuse why he had begun to disappear from your life.

It just happened, as it always does.

“How’s the band?” He smiled at you again and suddenly the air felt new again.

“Good, they’re… good. They miss you too, you know. Beomgyu has been giving me absolute hell, talking my ear off. Says he misses his vacation partner more than I miss my ex.”

The word ex hurt to hear directly from him but it couldn’t be helped— that was the proper label for your relationship now. Reality had begun to sunk in and all of the time spent, all of the distance traveled ultimately led to that word.

You weren’t each other’s anymore.

“Yeah.” You let out a deep breath and turned back toward the waters, they seemed much calmer now.

“I’d give anything to be stuck on a plane with Gyu for a few hours again.”

Soobin raised an eyebrow at you and leaned back, his hands propped up behind him in the sand. “He’d just be asleep. It’d be a ride full of snoring.”

You shrugged.

“It’s the time spent together that matters.” He only hummed in response.

The two of you sat in each other’s presence for the first time in months, the first time without the lingering question of ‘what are we?’ hanging over your heads and just existed.

It was nice, until it wasn’t.

“How are you really, Y/N?”

The same way the memories of him and your relationship were tossed at you the moment your feet touched the sand, it felt like that rubber band inside of you had snapped again as you felt your eyes well up with tears.

You were quick to blink them away but Soobin had noticed the change of your breathing pattern and frowned.

“I swear I’m okay—”

“I didn’t say you weren’t.”

Frustration bubbled in you before you remembered that you had brought this upon yourself. The fact of the matter was, you wanted to tell him.

That small light of hope inside of you wanted to tell him how your life was going as you’d done hundreds of times before, and you found yourself praying that he’d hold you in his arms the same way he had before.

“I could sit here for hours, and detail every single worry and anxiety that I’ve had all throughout my life. I could go through every second of my life, and remember exactly where I felt what emotion, but no matter how in-depth I go I still feel like no one will ever truly understand me.”

The sudden confession had him sitting up and shifting his body to face you fully, a sign to show you that he was listening.

The small smile that spread on your face made his own heart skip a beat. You appreciated his efforts.

“I know that that sounds… super corny or that I’m trying to be mysterious but at the end of the day, I don’t think anyone will ever truly understand you and what you go through as much as you can understand yourself, you know?”

“Getting close to that feeling of understanding is very hard and… sometimes it feels completely impossible but when I’m with you, I find that I don’t have to worry about feeling understood. I just am.”

The urge to cry seemed to overtake you and a tear managed to slip past your defenses as you cleared your throat, straightening your posture with a deep breath.

Soobin’s hand twitched at his side as he debated on grabbing yours to comfort you.

The last thing he wanted was to give you any false hope, so he didn’t.

“And I know that you don’t like when people cry in front of you and you’re probably gonna make fun of me. You’re probably going to laugh but I think… I need to hear your laugh..? Just to serve as some strange reminder that you still exist.”

If it weren’t for your shaky breaths and confession, there was always a small chance that he couldn’t tell you were crying.

But when you turned to face him once more and the streaks on your cheeks were revealed by the moonlight, it was unavoidable.

“I exist.”

All he could do was echo the words back to you as you smiled.

Despite what the rational part of his mind was telling him from before, he found himself ready to reach out and grab your hand.

He only stopped when you had already brought yourself to hold his.

“I guess with time, I realized that you helped me deconstruct whatever weird, hatred and bitterness I had towards the world and slowly, without me even realizing it— you replaced it with love.”

During the course of your relationship, Soobin had learned everything there was to learn about you. The same was true for you, as well.

When you spend so many years together, completely inseparable, the slips of truth and peeks into your soul were inevitable.

To know someone so intimately, to become one and the same.

“I always felt like when you’d kiss me, whatever sickness was in me slowly washed away and all I felt was sweetness.”

The noisy song of cicadas served to fill the silence as you took the time to catch your breath.

There were a few thoughts running through Soobin’s mind and as he did his best to follow the thread you had given him to somehow find out what conclusion you were trying to reach, he found himself resonating with anything you said.

Maybe his love for you could make anything you say sound reasonable.

“I found myself wondering if I’d be able to keep that sweetness in me without you, or if I’d just become bitter all over again.”

Your voice wavered a bit with the hesitancy to be honest, as if you were somehow admitting to a crime.

Soobin found that sentiment ridiculous. You weren’t guilty of anything, you were just in love.

“That sweetness wasn’t from me, it was always in you.”

Maybe it was the night getting to you as your eyelids began to grow heavy, puffy and welled with tears you still fought to hold back despite your newfound exhaustion.

The gentleness in his voice, always prominent when he was with you.

“I know. I know that now,”

“And I know that everything is over, so saying that probably sounds cringey now, but it’s still true.”

“It’s not, I feel the same way.” When you locked eyes his smile wasn’t held back.

There was no hesitation in his voice and the worry seemed to melt away, all he held was that same look of pure love and adoration he always had.

And you love the way he looks at you. Shy and half-cocked as though he was caught off guard by your words, as if he was worried that the time had somehow erased all that you felt and this sudden reassurance was exactly what he needed.

You couldn’t help but smile too as you stared into his eyes. Neither of you could look away, you searching his face as if you could see his thoughts. As if he was retracing his steps to remember all the ways to make you smile.

Soobin had always said you reminded him of the sea and attached you to a metaphor you had never heard before, when you thought you must have heard them all.

The same way that he had become your forest, you had become his sea.

You wondered if someone had broke his heart once and since then he couldn’t bear to be apart from the ocean.

You realized now that it was just how things were meant to be for the two of you. A bit of foreshadowing. The truth that the sea and the forest were much too different to exist together.

The strangest thing was how the smallest things could wreck a ship— like a rock, or a wave, or a hairline crack in the hull.

He’d call you his sea and stars and he would say it tenderly as he traced circles into your skin, as though you could sink him.

“I can’t say that I’m glad it’s over because that wouldn’t be true. I would just be lying to you and I was never really good at that in the first place.”

The sincerity in his voice confirmed what you were afraid of— he still loved you as much as you had him.

“I love you. That love will always be apart of me.”

Everything felt unfair in that moment. The way that happiness always seemed just out of reach— the unbearable yet undeniable fact that you were completely and irrevocably in love with each other in every single way.

But life moves on.

“I wanted to be connected to you forever so I guess even though I feel angry now, I’m grateful I got to feel that way at one point in time.” Still hushed, your voice was much more firm now.

Maybe the new rush of confidence was from how final these moments felt.

Finally being with each other after so much time spent apart, it felt like the only opportunity you had left to say everything you could before he was inevitably whisked away to bigger things.

“Right person, wrong time. Huh?”

He flashed you a sad smile and you scoffed, pushing his shoulder in a teasing way as he dodged you, shuffling closer.

Your heart skipped again.

“You’re kind of a jerk for saying that when you know that I hate when people use that as an excuse for things,” you sighed.

“But I guess it’s kind of true in our case...”

The silence took over again as he continued to study your face. Marks and features he once knew like the back of his hand he was now studying all over again as if it was the first time.

“Sometimes I wonder if whales feel anger as much as they feel grief.”

This time, it was his turn to give you a confused look.

“Whales?”

You nodded and found yourself focusing on the distant sound of a plane passing by overhead.

“It’s well known that whales experience emotions just as deeply as humans. There was a story about a whale whose child died and it traveled throughout the sea, carrying its corpse with it.”

Soobin grimaced at the idea but continued to listen, simply for the fact that it was you.

“I guess I can’t really blame it… because even though it’s a pretty morbid idea that most humans probably couldn’t even fathom, at the end of the day, none of us really know how to process those emotions and sometimes we do things that are completely illogical to other people just to find a way to cope.”

“It’s the same way that things like religion seem completely nonsensical to people who don’t believe in them because at the end of the day we’re all grasping for something to believe in to keep us going. Some people are perfectly content never finding that… I want to be one of those people. Perfectly content, I mean.”

He stared down at your hands, your grip on his slowly loosening. It wasn’t until he realized this and rushed to lock his fingers with yours that you looked back at him.

“…I think I don’t wanna have to worry about anything. Sometimes I even wonder what it would be like if I was just drifting away at sea, with no thoughts, and no worries. If I was completely alone and enveloped in the water and the waves, where the only thing that I could see for miles was the stars.”

Throughout your life, there was the constant knowledge of having a self, a heavy burden.

In everything there was a reminder: existence is immutable.

This reminder, with time, became more and more suffocating as you spent your years alone.

Burying yourself into school and work, all the way into adulthood to avoid the complete destruction that comes from existing.

Adulting and the weight on your shoulders that grew with the passage of time.

“But even though I want that I think at the end the day, I’d still miss you which is pretty scary.”

This existential loneliness and the desire to not exist was present in everyone’s life at some point and it could become overwhelming and almost unbearable.

You found, only in existing with other people could it become a bit more bearable.

Maybe running to other people for help was the easiest thing to do, or maybe it was what you needed to do to stay afloat.

After so many years of being alone, it was just nice to have someone to listen.

“You don’t have to miss me, I’m right here.”

“I’ll always be right here, even when you’re surrounded by the sea or the stars I’ll always come and find you.”

Always here, at the same place you had fallen in love.

Understanding him and the warmth that came from his reassurance didn’t help you stifle the giggle that you let out.

“You know that sounds pretty romantic when you say it, even though the conversation topic is pretty morbid.”

Now, he chuckled. “Nothing is ever really conventional with you though, is it?”

That was one of the things he found himself adoring about you and he would admit it a million times if you had asked him to.

Your mind was one of, if not, the most fascinating.

“I guess what I’m trying to say is, something about whales helps me feel more. Maybe that’s why I’m here—“

Besides the beach being a special place for the two of you and your relationship.

“Maybe it’s their songs, even if I can't understand them... though, sometimes they can't even understand their own.”

“What do you mean?”

As he shuffled closer for the second time, the gap between you was officially closed. The closeness reminded you of the first time he had kissed you, nervous and stumbling. It was sweet.

You found yourself pulling your hand away from his.

A part of him felt dejected at that but it was quickly washed away as he watched you raise your hands and pull his coat tighter around you.

He smiled again.

“There’s this story about a whale that traveled throughout the sea, all by itself, crying and wailing and no one ever found it. No whales ever found it because the vibrations were too low that they couldn’t understand and so the Navy had heard it, but they couldn’t find it themselves. And then eventually… it stopped.”

The ending didn’t seem to satisfy him as he raised an eyebrow towards you, urging you to continue.

“What happened to it?”

“Soobin,”

You looked over at him and in that moment of silence, there was a mutual understanding.

“…Oh.”

Burying yourself into his coat more, you found yourself wondering if he was cold as well. Not that he showed it.

“…Anyway, he was probably was roaming all by himself and died alone because no one ever came to help him.”

Soobin brought his hand to rub his arm and you realized that he was, in fact, cold.

Bringing his eyes back from the water for only a moment, he caught you staring and gave you a small smile again.

You never understood how he could be so comforting in moments like this.

“I know that story is really depressing but when you think about it, I think we’re all a little like that. At the end of the day when you’re going through these things alone, no one else will really know.”

“I don’t want you to go through things alone.”

You frowned, “I know you don’t.”

“It’s not their fault that they can’t hear or understand but on occasion, sometimes there will be someone who can hear it… and they’ll try their best to come.”

He felt heat rise to his cheeks and for a moment he felt bashful, as if he was somehow caught in an embarrassing situation.

“I think you did that for me, because you’re here— and you’re here because you heard me…”

After a few moments of Soobin thinking your words over in an attempt to find the perfect response, you finally pushed yourself to stand up.

His coat fell off of your shoulders as you brushed the sand off of yourself.

Soobin scrambled to his feet, picking up his coat and you smiled at him.

As the two of you stood, you anxiously stared down at your feet in the sand as he brushed the sand off of his coat.

Without anymore words, you found yourself clinging to him, wrapping your arms around him in a tight hug.

He stumbled back a bit in surprise but was quick to wrap his arms back around you, dropping the coat, long forgotten, onto the ground.

The waves seemed to pick up again, washing up on the shore once more as the cold temperature hit the both of you.

Neither of you seemed to mind.

“Thank you for coming.” Your voice was barely above a whisper now as you spoke into his ear.

He placed his hand gently on the back of your head, holding you close.

And when he touched you back, you felt a lifetime of indifference—of apathy melt away in that single moment.

And you ached for him.

His touch was the never ending reminder that you would bleed for him until the day he is gone. And you will continue to bleed for him every day after that.

The time will always pass and you will feel robbed— and you will grow bitter. But the memories will always be so, so sweet.

“Thank you for calling.”

The rest of the night was spent speaking in hushed tones as if the rest of the world was somehow listening in on the two of you.

Secret moments that you would remember for the rest of your days spent with the man who had showed you what your heart was worth.

What you didn’t tell Soobin that night was that during the Navy’s ten day search, a new 52-hertz frequency sound was found. The same sound, from two different locations.

Two different whales traveling through the sea, singing the same song of anguish.

Despite never finding each other, it’s possible that they heard each other singing this song only they could understand.

And although they were lonely, they were never truly alone.

Even in the seemingly endless ocean, it seemed possible for life to evolve towards connection.

The story you would always go back to when you remembered your love for him. The love that you would always hold.

Your past is what made you, because what happened then is how you got to where you are now. Good or bad, it's still apart of you.

In the end, Soobin would always be a part of you.

Everything he had shown you in your time together. And even though it was over now, you would treasure it forever.

The calming feeling that he had given you, like a gift. The comfort that the immediacy of your existence doesn’t have to define you, in that moment where the two of you simply existed with each other.

Everything was in a constant state of becoming, people would grow and change apart from each other in a variety of ways. But in the end, the love that once was will always remain.

જ⁀➴♡ phone in ᝰ.ᐟ