I Really Do Enjoy Standing Out In The Rain. Every Once In A While.

I really do enjoy standing out in the rain. Every once in a while.

And There We Were All In One Place

and by that i mean actually i was sitting alone in my car parked at the boat launch and singing to American Pie and kind of falling apart

i don't know what's wrong with me and my mother keeps trying to have a serious what's wrong? talk. but anyways today was three more tests and suddenly being sick and five hours of rehearsal which is actually the shortest it's been all week but still miserable because people are not nice. so i was driving home, and Don McClean came on the radio just as I started crossing the bridge home to my island, and I pulled over at the boat launch.

i think it was just stress and memories and everything at once but i just kept having flashes of ctyers as we were at cty and that song and us yelling and just being together and being safe and loved and together and invincible. i miss learning for the sake of wanting to know things and not having to feel bad about it. i miss a lot, and right now everything is stressful. so i just kind of sat there crying and looking at the water and it's the first time i remember being by that bridge on my favorite spot and not being comforted, because instead i was just struck by how alone i felt. even though i know i have friends here who i love dearly and this is why i write nice things about them and i know this is miserably melodramatic of me but so be it.

kind of like how tomorrow i'm going to want to be somewhere else while we work on sets for 12 hours. but anyways. point being, it might be a while before i work my way through my posts about people. cause i gotta get my act together. this is absurd.

A Brief Note

in that a facebook friend of mine was like "look at the new chicken coup" and i thought oh my god who did they overthrow i didn't know there was a fowl government there must have been blood and feathers everywhere and then i remembered puns are awful and hey at least it was actually a nice new chicken coop

On Ryan of Cats and Mathematical Puns

Hmm. This is going to be kind of stream of consciousness and probably less organized than I’d hope, but here goes. Ryan is someone I’ve been on and off acquaintances with for a while now, but I’m glad we’re now actually friends, because I’m almost always happy to talk to him. This kid lives in a beautiful world of knowledge and questions and wonder and post-rock and it’s fairly entertaining to just listen to him for a while. For being an incredibly smart person, Ryan also can be kind of slow at times, but it only shows when he tries really hard to find a socially acceptable place to sit. Just kidding. Kind of. But in all honesty, I’m always impressed with Ryan for keeping an open mind, for being humbler than he has right to be, honestly (shh), for making scientific jokes that I really truly appreciate, for being pretentious in only small doses, for never having an unkind word, for keeping me up to date on my Spanish, and for never being afraid to laugh at himself or his friends. And today, he finally got his bread. Even though it wasn’t Wonder. Point being, again, that you should really appreciate this boy, and tell him lots and lots so he knows for certain how awesome he is.