Who-actually-cares-anymore

im sure someones done this meme before but leverage characters in the stabbing alignment chart

In case no one told you growing up

Bras last longer if you let them air dry. Don’t put them in the dryer.

If you have a problem with frizzy hair, don’t dry your hair with a towel. It makes the frizzies worse. (I recently read an article that said to use a t-shirt? I brush mine out and let it air dry.)

Whites wash best in hot water. Everything else can be in cold - save on your electricity bill.

You can kill 99.9% of germs in a sponge by putting it in the dishwasher for a cycle or by microwaving it for 2 min (be sure to make the sponge damp before microwaving and to put a cup half full of water in with it and please DO NOT squeeze the sponge until it has cooled off)

Airing out your room/house and letting sunlight in every so often can decrease the number of household pests like silverfish and ants.

Black underwear is best during your period as stains are less likely to be visible.

To save money, put aside 10% of each paycheck into a savings account. It’ll add up.

Unless your hair has something on/in it (like grease or mud or something), using conditioner first can actually be the better choice. The conditioner holds in the good oils that help you hair look sleek and beautiful, which shampoo would otherwise wash away.

Speaking of shampoo - if you have long hair, washing just the bits that touch your scalp is generally enough. The rest of your hair gets cleaned with just the run off from your scalp.

If you put a tampon in and it’s uncomfortable/you can feel it, you didn’t do it quite right. A properly placed tampon is virtually unnoticeable by the wearer.

Apply deodorant/antiperspirant a couple hours in advance of when you need it. This gives the product the chance to block your sweat glands. Using deodorant just before going somewhere where you’ll sweat (this means walking outside for people in high humidity places) results in your sweat washing the deodorant off and starkly limiting its usefulness.

After running the dryer, use the dryer sheet from that load to brush out the lint catch - it gets everything off in a fraction of the time it’ll take you to get it clean with your bare hands. Paper towels also work well.

Wash your face everyday, or as often as possible. Forget which brand of cleanser is best. Just washing your face everyday will guarantee you clearer skin. And do you best not to pop pimples, as tempting as the urge may be.

Fold laundry asap after taking it from the dryer to avoid wrinkles. This may seem obvious for dress shirts and silly for things like t-shirts, but you’ll notice the difference even then once your shirts stop looking like unfolded paper balls.

Imagine Parker stumbling over Hardison's fanfiction about them. He started that after he found some conspiracies, headcanons and even RPF about them written by some of their clients, and surprisingly even one or two collaterals (ppl working for the CEOs they took out), so now he's fueling whatever he feels like. Imagine Parker starting to write (maybe even poetry) because "writing is cool, even though I haven't understood the use so far."

Now I am just imagining some bad guy they put away being told to channel their anger into writing for therapy reasons, and that writing turns into some kind of weird revenge fantasy on the team. The thing is, this is at a time when none of them are together, not even Hardison and Parker, and this dude is clearly writing them as some kind of romantic triad??? 

Which, you know, may or may not, lead Hardison down a rabbit hole where he stumbles upon fan-fiction or similar “therapy writing exercises” about them from other criminals or clients. It makes him weirdly happy that people see them like that, even if it is kind of weird. 

Cut to four years later and Hardison may have several aliases he’s carefully cultivated over the years where they are all in a relationship. There’s back story, drama, how they met, how they got together, their daily routine. The works. He justifies it by telling himself it’s not fantasy, just pragmatic. You know, in case they ever have to go into hiding and don’t feel like splitting up. 

Hardison gets such joy out of creating these aliases. It’s almost like his version of The Sims. He loves imagining all these other lives they could have. And yeah, one day Parker is being nosy and stumbles across them. At first Hardison is embarrassed and still tries to play it off as nothing more than back-up plans but it’s no use because it’s painfully obvious some of the aliases would be of absolutely no use if push came to shove and they needed to get out of dodge, like the alias where Eliot is a Professional Cowboy (”what does that even mean, Alec? Does he wear hats and big belt buckles for a living?”). 

Of course, Parker doesn’t make fun. Instead, she begins to add to them and comes up with all sorts of quirky new details, even suggesting some brand new aliases to add to the collection. 

They don’t tell Eliot; Hardison, out of embarrassment, and Parker because she doesn’t actually realise they aren’t telling him. 

Of course, this all comes to a head one night when Parker says she wants to do role play in the bedroom and Hardison is left speechless when Eliot comes into the room, more than a little smug, decked out in full cowboy gear saying, “the lil’ lady told me you got a wild west fantasy?”. And the drawl is so strong and Hardison is going to kill Parker, but not before he swoons just a little at the way Eliot tips his hat at him and winks like a 40s movie star, lets Hardison haul him in by his *cough* massive belt buckle and kiss him senseless. (Parker doesn’t understand the appeal of the cowboy look but she does like the low voice Eliot uses for the character and the way Hardison can’t take his eyes off of him.) 

After that, Hardison is much more willing to share his aliases with Eliot and Parker (even if he does get mocked for some of them- “professional dinosaur wrangler, Hardison, seriously??”). 

leverage season 1 plot