Izuku: *heard A Noise And Freaks Out Because Hes Home Alone* Hello?

Izuku: *heard a noise and freaks out because he’s home alone* Hello?

Izuku:

Izuku: If you came here to kill me, clap your hands.

Bakugo, came home early: *CLAP, CLAP*

Izuku, booking to the front door: SHI-

Bakugo: that’s it nerd. It’s too hard. I’m keeping you at arms length because you keep sacrificing yourself and it scares me

Midoriya: I understand *starts crying* I’ll leave you alone

Bakugo: what the fuck are you doing?? I said ARMS length! You get further than an arm away from me and I’ll kill you myself. I need you within grabbing distance. In sight at all times. Every step you take every breath you take I’ll be watching you motherfucker.

Shota: Izuku's crying, what should I do?

Yagi: Start with a hug.

Shota: With a what?

Izuku: You know, for once I wanna be screwed by something other than my life…

Aizawa, halfway through taking his clothes off : well do I have an offer for you

Aizawa: [knocks the door]

Izuku: Who’s there?

Aizawa: No, I’m not doing another knock-knock joke, Izuku.

Izuku: ...No I’m Not Doing Another Knock-Knock Joke, Izuku, who?

Aizawa: This is like, the safest thing how did you turn it into the most chaotic and get yourself in trouble?!

Izuku: Years of practice.