HUGE UPDATE

HUGE UPDATE

The surgery is done and it was a outpatient surgery so I was in for almost two hours, apparently I was there a bit too long and they won't say anything why. So let me tell you everything that happened, I am a bit traumatized after the surgery and it's not because of the pain or anything.

So again, we woke up 5 in the morning for me to shower my body and hair, left around 6 to go all way to the city to the hospital. Traffic was a bit crazy but we got there a bit late but they got me in fast. I was actually almost having a panic attack on the walk inside, elevator freak me out, how the car parking building is so low and we own a suburban. But when we were call in, the nurses were nothing but experience on their job and extremely nice to me. I soon told them that I am autistic and I was really nervous so they were gentle. I personally am afraid of needles but I only had three of sleep last night cause I was so scared so I was a bit tired but they made me feel safe, I joke around and talk with them, one of them gave me a donation bag with activities to calm me more, they were understanding to me. Soon, I was transferred to the waiting room to enter the operating room. I was still scared that I won't wake up but I want to put a brave face for my mom before they took me away. When they prep me in the bed, I was already tired from the lack of sleep that I fell asleep before they can hook me into the anesthesia.

When I woke up, my eyes were watery and I can hear myself crying, I didn't remember where I was or why I was there for a while but the "nurse" taking care of me was telling me to go back to sleep cause I awoke up as soon I was transported to the recovering room. I thought and told that I won't have dreams so I have no problem during the sleep, I have problem sleeping that I won't sleep at all cause the nightmares are extremely painful, but I got a nightmare during it and it made me more scared. The nurse was extremely rude, saying that I need to stop crying and that they can't let my mom in if I "scared" her off.

People need to understand something, the first nurses that prep me for the surgery understood this, I have separation anxiety from my family, imagine waking up to a bed and don't remember where you are, why your arms are in extreme pain, and where your family who you are so close is at. You have a nurse yelling at you to stop crying and being a baby.

I was having a fucking panic attack and an episode during this whole thing, I just wanted to see my mom, in my head, I thought I was dead and wanted to see her one more time but the lady keep yelling that I wasn't dead and I need to stop crying like a baby. This woman may not know my history but it's not nice to say that to a drugged up panicking teenager. When I say saw my mom, I grab her hand the whole time cause I was scared of the lady and I'm happy to see my mom alright. (I'm actually crying as I'm writing this, this really hurt me more than I thought)

While the lady still act the same with my mom there and left for a second, my mom was piss and wanted to slap her. I was so drugged up that I cry again that I was scared of the lady, apparently I'm more emotional when I'm fucked up. Soon, they move me to a different room and my sister trade with my mom to give me a stuff animal I brought to calm me more down, my sister witnesses me when the lady and another nurse made fun of me about what I hate to eat. I didn't like coconut milk or jelly so they said that they bet that I like chocolate cake which I'm dumbly said yes cause it's very true I love sweets and chocolate. My sister didn't say anything but when we left, I was still sad after everything. I'm just glad I don't stay in there anymore.

I just want to say that it was not what I guess was going to happen but it saddens me that there are people that are so stuck up about themselves and that she didn't care that my sister and mom see her actions. I'm going to meet the doctor in two weeks about the armpits and I'm staying in the house cause my family didn't want my wounds to get infected from the virus here, luckily there is no case about it in my town (Update: I just jinxed myself there..there are about 30 cases here and we are kind of quarantine in our house..) but people are panicking that my sister might not have enough things for food, diapers, and toilet papers. I agreed that everyone are panicking so bad that they don't care about other lives, not leaving some things for my sister or other people like us. But I am not going to step on that drama, people just need to remember to clean themselves and stop acting like idiots over something that they can stay away from, it's like people don't want to shower and be dirty and nasty. Luckily, we have a clean freak grandma that comes by to clean the house in bleach.

The book cover is a little slow but I had to reset it since I didn't feel...confident with it but hey! New drawing!

Plus little side note, been playing Sky: Children of the Light a lot and I enjoy playing with the other players too!

That's me if you light my candle! Don't be shy to say hi! I'll be by the entrance to the office, I just found out about it but I don't have the blue cape 😔

Crystal

a very OLD OC, here are some drawings I made!

I know it's been a while, but I still do draw when I am free. Here are some new drawings I did over the time!

Living more than 5 years in the desert, I never seen it stay. I am smiling and happy, happy Thanksgiving everyone!

Hidden Crystals (on Wattpad) https://my.w.tt/6DpbvlxDqZ **The cover pic belong to me, my drawing and I am not letting no one use it. Most of the characters here do not belong to me, it belong to Disney, DreamWorks, Pixar, and many more that I can't remember or list (since it all movie from all over the world). The ones that DO belong to me are the OCs, don't steal, ask me for the permission to use them…