REALITY OF FEAR, John Soap Mactavish

REALITY OF FEAR, John “Soap” Mactavish

word count: 742

summary: fluff, angst; you two get separated on the riskiest and leathal mission. all you can think about is if johnny is making it out alive.

warnings: violence, fluff, angst, suspense? friends to lovers.

-

Fear; something you were sure you were immune to.

This was the mission. Some of you would make it out alive, some of you wouldn’t. For the first half you wondered who was making it out, who was dead and who was alive. You were separated from Soap according to the plan that way made. You and Price were placed together, and for a reason you weren’t sure. You were a sniper and heavy artillery expert, you should have been with Soap to back him and watch over him.

You waited hours, waiting to hear Soaps voice, but to no avail. You heard everyone but him. Your aim was getting worse the more you thought about it, and the more you told yourself to “pull it together and focus” the worse you became.

You didn’t know Soap was thinking the same about you. You and price finally got ambushed and found from where the two of you were firing shots, leading you two to pick off anyone in your way.

The trigger of your pistol clicked multiple times, emptying the rest of your rounds into someones body.

“Hey-“ Price grabbed your shoulder, making you turn and take a breath.

“I get it, but we need to focus. Your aim is sloppy…what’s wrong?” He asked.

“Soap…”

The two of you were good friends, but not together. You were worried and embarrassed for letting fear over come you.

“I know, and I had a feeling. I wondered myself if they were alive” he paused; “but worrying is gonna kill ya’.”

You nodded taking a deep breath, wiping the blood off your face and picking your sniper back up.

-

For the rest of the mission, you hadn’t heard anything. It would have came in on the radio if he was killed? Why wasn’t anyone saying anything?

The more you questioned the more you let yourself go, till finally it was over.

“Let’s get out of here…see who made it out” Price said sounding a little disappointed.

The ride back was long. It felt longer then it needed to be at least and your mind couldn’t stop thinking about him. If he was dead, how would that effect you? If he was alive how would you handle it? Till you made it back and you felt like the waiting was going on forever. Someone could have told you, why didn’t they? Maybe he was dead and they didn’t know how to say it?

The whirling of a chopper was heard, as you sat outside of base waiting to hear that same whirling noise for the last thirty minutes. Carrying yourself up the stairs you felt like crying. Over 6 hours of not knowing, you would finally have your answer. Did you want to know? Maybe you’d rather let it be unknown.

It didn’t matter now, you were already up to the top of the stairs standing there watching the chopper land. Once landed you seen that Ghost was alive, causing a smile to spread across your face. There was a little bit of hope.

A blooded arm reached for the handle, jumping down and looking at you with a huge smile. His beautiful smile the one you missed seeing for the last six hours. You dropped your weapon to the floor, running to Johnny and attempting to hold back the tears of happiness.

He held your lower back as you swayed back and fourth in that hug. You released your grip a little looking up to him.

“I waited and waited…Johnny I thought you were dead.” You confessed, it was embarrassing, but he didn’t care. He just moved his face closer to yours, placing his lips against the soft flesh of your very own.

“I’m sorry for making you wait lass” he said placing a kiss on your head.

“I’m proud of you,” he said. There was a bit of a pause, not knowing what exactly to say without saying everything.

“Come, let’s get your arm looked at yeah?” You nodded towards him and he followed.

Holding hands walking back down to the medic he confessed, something you weren’t expecting. Not now, not tomorrow, hell maybe not even in the next month. But he told you, and he had his reasons and intentions.

“I love you…you made me realize that today” You were quick to reply, there wasn’t a hesitation in your words, not even a stutter.

“I love you too Johnny.”

MINE ALL MINE, simon “ghost” riley

word count : 775

summary: simon and you were one confusing blend and as time went on the both of you parted ways. little did you know this wasn't the end

warnings: arguing? angst, fluff

song : My Love Mine All Mine, Mitski

So, when I die, which I must do

could it shine down here with you?

1 month earlier

"Simon..." you paused. For the last few weeks nothing was the same with you and Simon. It wasn't that he was gone all the time but just his demeanour wasn't the same. Most days you would come home to Simon in his Ghost balaclava and everyone knew what that meant. He was cold, or hostile then would come back hours later to apologize as Simon. You couldn't keep playing this game and once you offered a hand for help he refused. You were determined to make it work, but he wasn't.

"I'm not going to keep arguing..." you said clearly tired with all the bickering.

"It only took so long for you to give up on me" He argued, intentionally looking to egg you on.

"I'm not giving up Simon I'm just-"

"Your just what?!" You two were so happy before these last two weeks and it only made you wonder what went so wrong. What did you do? What didn't you do?  But not once did you say to yourself that it was just 'Simon being Simon'.

"I am done! I can't stand to not do something about how you've been acting! Just... please go." You said, tears welling into your waterline as he stared coldly into your eyes, his own trying to find some sense into the mistake he was making by leaving you in that living room alone a crying mess.

-

There was no doubt Simon missed you. He wanted to call you back, answer all those voicemails of your soft and trembling voice.

"I know, and I'm sorry for the messages. I'm trying because I miss you... if I didn't try to get ahold of you I think I'd feel pretty bad about myself. Simon... just know that I'm here when you need me. You can come back to me when you need me, whenever you're ready...Goodbye." 

You had sent that message three days ago and he would listen to it when he got the chance to be alone which was more often then usual now that you were gone. It was the same for you. You left voicemails after each call he didn't answer and each time you hoped just a al little bit that he would pick up the phone. He never did but you still hoped and had faith. He loved that about you. How you kept him happy and positive and how you two were one in the same. You can’t give that up, and he realized that now.

The ring if the door bell was heard in the other side of the door as Simons hand fell back to his side. He knew she cared, but what if it was too late for him to come back? How can he just let something, someone like her just leave?

The door opened and he looked up to the girl, removing his balaclava as you gave him a half smile, his eyes looking into yours waiting for you to give in and to which you did. You attached yourself to his torso hugging him in hopes he was really here to stay. He hugged back, resting his head on-top of yours as he gently caressed your back.

You gently let go of him as you held his hand pulling him inside.

You two wound up upstairs, your mouths like magnets. All he wanted was to be with you and vise-versa. He stopped though, letting you take a second to sit back. His hand held yours before he explained his reasoning.

“I don’t want you to think I only came back for the sex…let’s not tonight okay?” He said, his thumb gently gracing over the back of your hand. You smiled at him and kissed him once more.

“Okay” Not even devastated in the slightest, you fell back into his arms as he held you close to his own body. Neither of you needed to converse about what your place was with one another because you both knew it. Simon wanted to keep you safe at all costs, you were his main priority not even himself. You just wanted to make him feel like himself, let him enjoy his life without thinking of his past.

“I’m glad you came home” he looked down at you, swiping his fingers through your hair before pressing a kiss on your head

“Me too.”

That’s so wholesome and wonderful

Shadow Ghost & Soap

Im very normal about him🗣️ he definitely didn’t invade my mind so badly I can’t think straight anymore 🙏🙏 love him

masterlist roommate!simon

Roommate!Soap who leaves his shirts and hoodies scattered around the flat, patiently waiting for the day he’ll see you wearing them

At first, it's just a hoodie messily thrown on his usual seat in the kitchen and you pay it no mind, being just careful not to spill anything on it. Next is a t-shirt, strategically placed on the arm of the couch, almost as if he left it there by accident. Shaking your head and muttering something about boys and their habits, you gently fold it and place it back, unaware of the man standing in the door and watching you

"Thanks for that- must have missed it when doing laundry!"

"Aren't you military men supposed to be all neat and tidy and such?", you mock him with an amused smirk on your face. He rolls his eyes in reply, too busy trying to contain the hot blush that was threathening to spread across his face: any other person he knew would have thrown his t-shirt on the ground instead of bothering to fold it and treat it with such care.

Roommate!Soap who, after you start doing laundry together, accidentally mixes his clothes with yours, sneaking a sweater or a shirt in your pile of freshly-washed sweathshirts. He secretly wishes you'll one day fail to return them, but he's already grown used to the neatly stacked pile of his belongings that you would place on his side of the couch as you wouldn't enter his bedroom

Roommate!Soap who starts to believe his plans are turning into a success when, one day, the black hoodie he sneaked in your laundry, is still missing from his side of the couch. Trying to ignore the giddy feeling inside his chest, he begins to think of ways to tease you about it, but he closes his mouth as quickly as he opens it the moment you show up into the living room, promptly planting the hoodie into his arms

"I'm actually glad none of my clothes have slipped in your laundry yet", you joke with him, blind to his resigned expression. "Can't imagine how embarrased I would be if you had to deal with my nightwear!"

He wouldn't mind it, not at all.

But he ends up shrugging his shoulders and cracking a joke about what kind of nightwear you own. The black hoodie never felt heavier in his arms.

Roommate!Soap who comes home from a mission in the middle of the night and can't stop a wide smile from spreading on his face. He actually has to take a moment to process the fact that there you were, passed out on the couch, wearing his black hoodie.

Roommate!Soap who instantly takes out his phone and tries to take a selfie with your sleeping figure, his beaming figure glowing with happiness. His huffed chuckles wake you up and you hide your face in your hands when you realise he knows you're wearing his clothes.

"It's just- you left it on the couch and it got cold and-"

"No need to explain yourself, bonnie. It just took you a while to get the message."