A Room Full Of Human Disasters With One Shared Brain Cell - Tumblr Posts

I loved the seven evil exes !! ‘M kinda curious as to what happens when all 7 meet face to face- it would be a train wreck.. - :[ anon

seven evil exes: reunited

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

frank castle x reader, matt murdock x reader, pietro maximoff x reader, loki x reader, druig x reader, tony stark x reader, doctor strange x reader

synopsis: your hospital stay pulls out all of your doting exes from the shadows, and a large argument insues with threats of flying limbs and stabbings with spoons

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

“im fine, nat.” you moved from her reach as she tried to brush your hair over your stitches. you noticed that she had been tidying the room up and cleaning you up, even painting your toes which she must’ve done while you were unconscious because otherwise she would’ve never been able to hold you down.

“what’s going on?” you asked her as you saw an approaching figure that dawned a green cape with a large horned golden helmet that seemed all too familiar-

“natasha!” you yelled as the door swung open to reveal loki, standing before you with a frown of worry.

“my dove-“ he walked over to you and fussed, examining your injuries. you had a broken arm, fractures in your legs and a concussion that had taken you out for days.

“loki. what are you doing here?” you glared daggers at natasha who was stuffing the makeup brushes into her bag. natasha looked up and raised an eyebrow, “oh! i didn’t call him..”

you felt like you got slapped across the face, besides that, the drugs were working.

“well then..who did you call?”

natasha looked past you and towards the window to see a specific blind lawyer and a well dressed tony stark, behind each other and both unaware of the other as they rushed to your room.

“no!” you shoved loki off and tried to stand up, clawing at the wheels of your bed as you collapsed on the floor. you groaned, and loki tried to help you up.

“y/n!” a portal opened up from under you and suddenly stephen strange was holding you by the waist and pushing you back up onto the bed.

“goddamnit!” you felt defeated as the pain hit you like a shock wire. stephen chided you as he let you brace yourself on him. loki had stepped back to stare at stephen.

“what are you doing on her-“ he began but you waved a hand to shut him up.

just as you had finally gotten back onto the bed, matt who had been using his cane the entire time to make it seem like he was just your average blind lawyer, threw the cane onto the chair near the door and stepped up to the side without loki and stephen, who were both giving each other the most menacing glare.

“y/n? are you alright? i could hear your heart beat from the parking lot and it was thumping incredibly loud, like you’re scared or something-“ matt rambled on, his voice shaky.

“what in the fuck is this? disneyland?” tony strode into the room and took his sunglasses off as he glared at you. you looked at him in disbelief, “whatever head game you played on me, wore off. i remember everything now.”

you swallowed nervously as tony stayed in his place by the door, “we got the three blind mice,” he looked over at matt and smirked, “who was actually believable to be blind-“

“i am.” matt piped up but you squeezed his hand.

“reindeer games who if i last remember,” tony gave you a glance, “had faked his death and ran off into the distance.”

“clearly you needed to be caught up.” loki remarked.

“and then we have stephen, who out of this bunch, including my dashing self, seems to be the most normal.”

“can i add myself to that equation too?” pietro had appeared into the room and you wanted to at that moment, literally jump off a cliff. as you thought it couldn’t get any worse, it was.

natasha stepped up from the background and peered behind matt, “this is the one i actually called. for being fast, you got here pretty late!” she scolded pietro and he shrugged, “i was doing some decorating for when she comes home.”

you rolled your eyes, “jesus christ.”

matt nudged you, “hey.” he chided and you waved a hand.

“so who’s actually the boyfriend?“ tony asked as he and the men just stood in place around your bed. any other situation, this many men surrounding you would’ve been the perfect wet dream, but considering it wasn’t dream, you made it to be your worst nightmare.

they all looked at each other before a collective, “me.”

“so leaving brazil lands you in a hospital bed?” another voice spoke from behind the men and you looked up to see the familiar gaze of druig.

“please, no more of you guys.” in the back of your mind you thought of your worst ex and how he would literally have a field day of your embarrassment, and you just prayed he wouldn’t show.

“there’s more of us?” stephen raised his eyebrows and you tugged on a robe, “you’ve been the most recent, so no.”

he nodded intently and looked to druig, “well, welcome to the “we’ve fucked y/n” club.” he gave a fake smile and druig glared at him, “speaking of her so disrespectfully is making me want to reject that invitation.”

you shrugged, “i don’t mind.”

“of course you don’t, draga.” pietro patted your head and you winced lightly.

“watch it. my dove doesn’t need to be dealing with this. asgard has all you need if you just come wit-“ loki was cut off by the stomping of large and familiar boots coming from the corridor.

“where is she?!” a shout rose from the hallway and all the men raised their eyebrows in surprise to see a scary looking man, shouting to find you.

if you could, you would’ve grabbed the pillow and tried to put yourself into a coma.

“this is just great.” you spoke.

frank looked at all the men in the room and laughed, “look at all of you. a circus of freaks.” he laughed again, “hey red, how’s life looking?” he teased matt who sat uncomfortable in his chair, “bleak.” he said bluntly and you could tell by his body language that matt wasn’t aware of you and frank castle.

“wow.” was all natasha said to break the silence. the men were now fully surrounding you in a circle. and you never wanted to hide your face more than this moment.

“i cannot believe you slept with tony stark.” pietro spoke.

“i cannot believe you actually care-“ tony defended himself and a mountain of voices created an argument and you yelled to get their attention.

“can everyone just stop?!” they all turned to look at you and you sighed, “loki. please leave, it’s been so long i don’t even think you had anything better to do today than to visit me. go beg for leadership elsewhere.” you waved a hand and before he could protest, loki was faded out.

“whoa.” was all that druig said as he looked at you, “and you.” you now fixated on him, “youre psychotic. get help.” druig scoffed and you waved him away.

“tony, god you embarrass me. literally get out of my room.” tony began to protest but you waved a hand, but you paused briefly, “remember that snitches get stitches.” and he faded out.

“we’ll talk later, i cant leave the sanctum alone for long.” stephen saw himself out with a portal and you turned to natasha and held a hand out, “exactly what i mean.”

natasha stifled a laugh. and then you were down to the remaining three men.

“you guys are kind of my favorites, the drugs will have me admit that.” the three men looked at each other and shrugged.

“pietro, you can take me home, just please go make yourself busy until nat gets me discharged.” pietro nodded a sped away.

matt turned to you as pietro left, “what’s left for me? ‘i hate blind guys so give me your cane so you can stumble out of here?’”

you laughed and nudged him, “of course not. im taking your glasses too.”

matt laughed and you smiled for a brief moment, forgetting of the looming figure standing near the sink.

“matthew, im really mad over how we left things, i would love to talk more but i don’t think this is the right setting.” matt nodded, “i understand. you know hell’s kitchen will always be your home.” he stood up and kissed your forehead.

he walked out and now you were left with the final man.

“frank.” you held your arms out to the marine who walked to hold you in his embrace.

“i missed you so much but you picked the worst time to see me.”

“worst time? my girl’s in the hospital having an argument with every one of her ex boyfriends and you say that’s a bad time? this was entertaining!” he laughed and you rolled your eyes, “whatever. just promise me that you’ll check in?”

frank nodded, kissing your cheek as he shoved a hat over his face, “yes ma’am.”

hours later and sleep came so easily as you you asked for it. pietro remained the only ex you kept around just for the sake of him scratching that itch every so often while being free of the responsibility that came with it.

but you decided to move back to hell’s kitchen to be closer to matt and frank, you saw a future with either of them.

but for now, you were tucked into your bed as you admired the basket of gifts sent by your lovers, natasha stealing the candy from every single one of them.