And Let Them Flirt Ofc - Tumblr Posts

Fuck anonymous, please give us loving smack talk as both guide the guardian through some mission. Please?

Lololol omg, we need more of this type of content in-game 😂 Their smack talk in missions is always hilarious. Thank you so much for this request, hope you love it!

"Guardian. Thank you for taking the time to finalize this patrol. I will be guiding you through it." Eris's voice spoke from over the comms as the Guardian ran through a long and winding tunnel on the Moon, continuing deeper and deeper through the caves in search of Hive to kill.

  "And I'll be taggin' along too." Came the Drifter's crackly voice, joining Eris's over the signal.

  "Rat. I did not invite you to this mission, and I do not recall the Guardian doing so either."

  "No, you didn't, but I figured my company would be appreciated."

  The Guardian countinued to traverse deeper through the dark caves, running at a dangerously high speed which countinued to risk the possibility of them running face first into a rock.

  "And why would you assume such a thing?" Came Eris's voice.

  "Aww- Moondust! You know you enjoy my company. No need to pretend otherwise."

  "This matter is best left spoken of in private, Drifter." Eris replied, ending their current conversation as the Guardian found and shot a Hive scout.

  The Guardian spotted another two Hive scouts a moment later, along with a Knight. They shot a number of rounds at the scouts first, taking them both down in a matter of seconds before rolling out of the way of the Knights oncoming bullets. They ducked behind a large boulder, pulling out their sniper and peeking over the edge. When they got the Knight in view through the large scope, the Guardian took their shot, shooting until the Knight had fallen over dead.

  "Great work, Hero!" The Drifter congratulated them.

  "Drifter, what are you doing now?" Eris asked him.

  "Uhh, makin' lunch. You wanna come over?"

  "No. I'm sure you are cooking some manner of repulsing creature." Eris's voice held a tinge of disgust.

  "Nah, I'm cookin' up a stew. Remember how much you liked my last one?" The Drifter asked.

  "It was surprisingly good." Eris admitted. "What are the ingredients of the one you cook currently?"

  "Hah! The Guardians down there shootin' Hive and we're sittin' here talkin' about food." The Drifter laughed to himself. "Anyway, there's chicken, chopped up celery and onions, and then some dumplings. Sure you'd like it, Moondust."

  "It... sounds quiet appetizing."

  "Yeah... smells pretty good, too." The Drifter said. "Woah, hey now, the Guardians doin' great. I dare say they've already cleared out half that cave. Hah!"

  "Indeed, you do well Guardian." Eris told them as they fired some more rounds at the nearby Hive. "Your assistance in these matters is always greatly appreciated."

  "Yeah, yeah, keep on congratulating the Guardian, but never tell me I do a good job..." The Drifter said with mock gloom.

  "Jealous, are you?" Eris asked, amusement in her voice.

  "Maybe..."

  "You would not agree that the Guardian deserves congratulations?" Eris asked as the Guardian took down another Hive Knight.

  "Oh, no. They deserve congratulatin' all right, that's a fact. I just wish you'd tell me I do a good job more."

  "Then perhaps you should do more that warrants congratulating, Germaine." Eris spoke, almost affectionately.

  "I picked up the Derelict for you." He pointed out.

  "And that is something you should do even when I am not coming to visit." Eris told him. "Though, I do appreciate your consideration of my thoughts. The Derelict does look tidier."

  "Heh... thank you, thats all I wanted." Then softer, as if he was hoping he wouldn't be heard, the Drifter said, "I'll dish up the food in a minute,"

  The Guardian countinued shooting, making the Hive fall one by one, while they dodged their oncoming bullets.

  "Yes, yes." Came Eris's impassioned voice. "Make them fall, make them feel the pain and suffering they have afflicted upon us!"

  "Yeesh, your intense, Moondust. Remind me not to get on your bad side."

  "You have been on my bad side many a time." Eris pointed out.

  "And lived to tell the tale, can you believe that?" He laughed. "Anyway, here's your bowl Eris." His voice was soft again, but the Guardian still heard every word.

  "Thank you." Was Eris's equally quiet reply.

  The Guardian began to shoot at a Hive Wizard, breaking it's shield in a matter if seconds.

  "Whoo!" The Drifter let out when the Guardian successfully took down the Wizard. "Feels almost like Gambit. You should come by, Hero, I'll double your rewards if you'll kill a Wizard by yourself in the first round."

  "Rat, now is not the time for making deals and wagers. The Guardian needs to focus."

  "Alright, fine."

  The Guardian filled the next few moments of silence with the sound of gunshots firing and knives swishing by through the air.

  "The soup is good, Germaine. Thank you." Eris spoke softly.

  "My pleasure, Moondust. I figured you'd like it, glad you came over to have a bite."

  "Indeed." Then returning to normal volume, Eris said, "wonderful work, Guardian. This will surely aid in keeping the Hive population back."

  "And don't forget about Gambit, alright? I always need more Motes." The Drifter jumped in.

  "Last I saw, you seemed to have plenty." Eris interjected.

  "Eh, still always need more." He replied. Then back to the Guardian, "but, uh, I'm gonna be busy for a little while right now. Just drop by later if you wanna take up my offer, yeah?"

  "Indeed, thank you, Guardian, for you much needed assistance. The Drifter and I will be going now."

  The Guardian shrugged off the questions they had pertaining to Eris and the Drifter's strange vagueness, and instead moved on to using their party emote, before heading back up into orbit.