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the way some ppl will say that random ass phannies ruined dan and phils friendship by shipping them makes me kinda laugh bc like. i thought u were againt rpf why are u making shit up

it's the funniest fucking anti rpf talking point ever like so many people will genuinely say dan and phil stopped being friends because of shippers and it's just..... they're married???????????? what are you TALKING about

Why do you talk about dan and phil as if they were a confirmed couple ? Bestfriends who are gay also act like that.

listen i appreciate bait but i do prefer if it's worded more convincingly

💚💜

greens and purples

[original under the cut]

I think at this point, they could get legally married and some people would still argue if they’re together romantically or not. The cognitive dissonance is strong with some people lol

Us circa 2027 explaining to Twitter phannies that DnP got married and them going "They did it for business reasons" or some shit

[Video transcript:

Phil: Maybe I should wear it like this.

(gasp sound effect)

Phil: Is that better? Is that worse? (laughs)

Dan: I'm gonna make you blur that.

/Video transcript ends.]

Thinking about straight people who know the state of Dan and Phil’s relationship and still refuse to accept they’re together because they’ve never explicitly said it.

My buddy, they are two gay men in their thirties who have said outright that they have been attached at the hip since they met 15 years ago. They have lived together, with no other roommates, for the past thirteen years and have never indicated dating anyone else. They refer to the home they are currently living in as their “forever home,” as in they plan to spend forever there. I truly don’t know what else you want.

I keep on thinking about how Dan specifically said it was MORE than just romantic, and I can’t help but draw the lines between that moment and every time Dan calls Phil his best friend. That’s what that means to me, that their relationship isn’t just romantic, it’s SO MUCH more. It’s friendship, it’s companionship, it’s mumaging, encouragement, acceptance, as well as defiance and “I’ve got to be honest with yeh or we’re not going to get anywhere”, it’s taking care of each other.

It’s so different from so many relationships I’ve seen (and been in) where they are together romantically but that’s about it. There’s not any career support, maybe you’re barely even friends. Some couples don’t trust each other or know one doesn’t accept the other for who they are. I’m sure Dan knows this, but sometimes it’s so hard to comprehend if you haven’t experienced it. Because at the core of good relationships, you ARE friends. You’re best friends. I’ve also had a relationship like this where I was dating my BEST friend, and it never felt incorrect to refer to her as such, especially in the company of friends. In some instances, it made more sense for me to refer to her like that

Hi Finn! Keepin’ it on anon ‘cause I’m shy. Also, this opinion might be half-baked. I’ve read your essay! Great points were made — still, I’d like to contribute with something I’ve also noticed throughout the years: Not only some people may overstep on their too-complex-to-actually-put-into-words relationship, but overanalyze some of Dan or Phil’s comments as well. What I’m trying to say is, I’ve met people who idealized Dan and Phil’s relationship so much, that they get their expectations too high on their content, forgetting they are, in part, just creators.

Bringing my point further, I remember Dan jokingly (but also as a reminder) once said him and Phil were both content creators, not reality stars. As internet creators, it is true some of their comments (either on social media, or videos) are made to fuck around with their audience, some others may come up without a prior thought process, or were said just to be #relatable. The point is, these comments do not necessarily reflect their realities nor real feelings. I’ve read people actually doubt their relationship and love/appreciation for each other just because they joked about desiring other men, as an example. Hell, even people taking jokes waaayyy to seriously.

There comes the extreme idealization of relationships. Dan and Phil are internet personas at the end of the day, whatever they say or do on the web, most of the time, is not meant to be taken too literally. Idealizing their relationship as if their content has to necessarily reflect a romance out of a fairytale between the two at all times is foolish. Dan and Phil can say whatever they want online, be this recognizable character, speak about whatever or whoever. Not because they don’t act “couple-y” enough or make extreme jokes about swinging on a channel / talk about other people their relationship should be doubted.

That’s not how all relationships work. Their bond is very clear, sure, but hoping it will be straight out of a generic romance novel can be really harming to your expectations. Also, I feel like as if people tend to forget their content is about a duo out there being silly and queer, and making speculations of how does their relationship work off-camera based on their characters ends up distorting reality even more. They stated it several times. What is meant to be personal will be kept private.

Does this make sense? help

Thank you for sharing :D

I definitely agree and think that it is also adding onto my point of people who assume things, and how queer relationships can be very different. I think some people can get a bit attached to the concept that dnp are strictly monogamous and they can only be that or else it ruins the fantasy of their dynamic. They may be completely monogamous to each other and all the jokes they make about Dan being a cougar looking for twinks, or Phil and his 10 foot wang out on the town every sunday - and all their many other jokes that are sexual or romantic and not directed at each other - they may all just be funny and not mean a thing. But I still think the issue is peoples inability to believe that there are other possibilities outside of, again, the heteronormative monogamous relationship idea that is immediately put on them.

And I also think people can get a bit overbearing with this whole “well we know them, so we know they don’t interact with anyone else and are only for each other” even though they have said they’ve been to gay bars (in catboy costumes 😭) and out in clubs, seeing friends and obviously dan went out many times on tour - I think sometimes people become too attached to the idea that they fully know the both of them, but we only know what they choose to share. I think Dan covers a lot of amazing points in his “We are in a relationship” video about the parasocial nature that we share with him and also phil, but also them as a duo, but I feel that most people like to ignore the things that they have shared about privacy or how the parasocial behaviours have been really damaging to them, because it can make people feel like they’re hurting them - which I’m guessing most people don’t want to believe they are doing.

I think people just need to find a middle ground :-] its easy to respect their boundaries and still love them so much, but it should always be remembered how they are actually humans - who exist in a non-fantasy universe when the cameras are off, and to make sure you’re aware of their boundaries

And also to make sure you arent being too weirdly intense or rude to other fans - sometimes people can gain a superiority complex about “defending” dan and phil, or acting like they are higher than others, which is equally weird to do and also equally invasive to act like you know them enough to defend their dynamic / relationship.

to be loved is to be changed etc

facetiming each other first thing in the morning...good morning texts with selfies...the first thing they think about when they wake up is each other and that's just so-

the era of "people don't have to know everything about us" coinciding with big life commitments like building and owning a house together lowkey alters my brain chemistry. that they've done these really important things, but with very clear boundaries kept up between their life and the content they put out — it really reinforces the fact that they are real people who genuinely just want to be together as real people. not as youtubers or personalities, as human beings. and them deciding not to show us their house is kind of a perfect metaphor for that: none of what they've built together was built for us. they built it for them.

Dan and Phil seem to have shifted from keeping their relationship completely private to constantly flaunting their insanely in tune, soulmate-level connection. I don't know what inspired the change but I want them to keep flexing on us forever

Day 5- Favourite DanAndPhilGames video - Overcooked 2 (Livestream)

these three tweets being posted the same day.... y'all...

Dan really had a solo career for a year and then was like "ok that's enough" and went back to being a duo with Phil

i understand why dan and phil rarely livestreamed from the gaming channel pre-coming out, the pent up force of that much homosexual self restraint on the regular would have caused some sort of natural disaster in the middle of london

sometimes i just cant believe they really were gay and in love the whole time

won the rpf lottery

character development <3

i genuinely kind of want to write an essay on the phandom and how lots of people perpetuate heterosexual stereotypes onto dan & phil (two gay men) and how they will probably never meet expectations of people regarding them dating because of the way people expect them to live out a non-queer relationship while being two queer people.

(update : i have posted this btw <3)