Centaurs Are Jerks - Tumblr Posts

Fablehaven Fic-let

bracken: i try to be a peaceful being

kendra: you punched a centaur in the face

bracken: he threatened me!

kendra: no??? he threatened ME

bracken: when someone threatens you, they threaten me, bc you are my life

kendra: ...oh...that was incredibly smooth and beautiful

bracken:

kendra:

bracken:

kendra: you still PUNCHED a centaur bc he threatened to push me

Fablehaven Brackendra + Centaurs

CREDIT TO @fablehavenshitposts FOR THE IDEA. If you have any, please message me :)

It was a miserable day- the sky couldn’t seem to decide it it wanted to rain, be cloudy, or just be both at once. Which, of course, was why the Centaurs insisted on meeting outside to discuss Vanessa’s punishment.

‘Honestly- it isn’t even that bad! Bracken can just sever the hold, Greymane!’ Kendra was tired of all the polite compromises, and the outburst took her by surprise. Bracken winced beside her.

The tall Centaur pulled himself up, trying to look as intimidating as possible. Which really wasn’t all that hard.

‘You dare side with the Narcoblix? Even after all the has done to you, and, worse, you dare insult ME? I am the leader of the Centaurs! No puny mortal shall get away with such blasphemy in my presence!’ 

He began to take a threatening step towards Kendra, and just as he was about to take another, Bracken was suddenly there in front of him. Greymane blinked in surprise, and before he could say anything more, Bracken’s fist smashed into his face. The old Centaur staggered backwards, his nose bleeding slightly, and glared at Bracken in shock.

‘And, more importantly, nobody gets away with threatening Kendra in my presence. Vanessa will be pardoned, and we will take away her pizza privileges for a month. No exceptions. And no compromises. That is my final offer, Greymane.’ Kendra gaped at her boyfriend, before the Centaur glowered in assent, trotting away in humiliation.

It would have been a fight that they all knew Bracken would win anyways.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                         ‘Hey, I try to be a peaceful being!’ Bracken argued.

‘You punched a Centaur in the face! Greymane, no les!’ Kendra retaliated.

‘He threatened me.’

‘No, he threatened ME.’

‘When someone threatens you, they threaten me, because you are my life.’

‘...That was incredibly smooth and beautiful...’

‘You still punched a Centaur in the face, though.’

‘Wait. You punched Greymane in the face!? And I wasn’t even there!?’ Seth was upset to say the least. Although perhaps for all the wrong reasons. Kendra hadn’t even noticed him sneaking up on her.

Bracken blushed slightly, looking down in embarrassment.

‘He threatened Kendra.’

‘NOW you admit it!’ Kendra grinned. Suddenly Bracken seemed to realize something.

‘Oh no. Mother’s going to kill me.’