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Spooky Girl
Summary: Ghost, Soap, Rudy and König have a girlfriend who just likes things, that are a bit spooky. (Just a few little scenes that my brain spit out.)
Wordcount: 2.497


Ghost
"Are you growing your hair out, L.T.?" Johnny laughed and flicked Simon's wrist.
Simon reacted as expected. Not at all. He stared at Johnny motionlessly.
"Fits the look, after all.", the sergeant winked at him.
Simon rolled his eyes and pulled his sleeve over the hairband on his wrist.
Johnny continued to grin. "My sisters say these scrunchies are best for the hair. There's less friction. So no split ends."
Simon continued to stare at him.
"Are you going to tell me why you've got that thing on?", he grumbled.
"No.", was Simon's simple answer before he turned back to his food. It was nobody's business. (Y/n) was nobody's business, or what was between them. It was still too fresh anyway. This was his first mission since they had met. He wasn't sure what to make of this relationship yet. He liked her. It wasn't because of that. He was just too used to being alone. It scared him. His therapist would probably have found a bigger, more important-sounding word for his emotions, but fear seemed appropriate enough to Simon.
She was weird. He was weird too. He had started to like the weirdness. He was probably too old for her. Maybe he wasn't. He'd never been in a relationship. He'd never had to discuss the fact that his hoodies were actually HIS hoodies until a few months ago. She had only told him that they were hers now, as if that was the most normal thing in the world. But she looked really cute in them. She'd beamed at him when he'd unceremoniously thrown three of his hoodies on her bed.
"Until I get back.", he'd mumbled.
She had then pulled her hairband off her head and put it around his wrist. The black satin with the little skulls on it was soft and had immediately clung to his skin.
"So that you'll really come back.", she had said and kissed him on the forehead.
"Always.", he had mumbled.
"Who is she?" Johnny asked him directly. He looked at him with gentle playfulness.
Simon snapped out of his memory. He looked into his friend's blue eyes. "You don't trust me with a 'he'?", he grinned under his mask.
"Well then HE definitely has long hair."
Simon shook his head in amusement. "A little one from home. It's still fresh."
"Photo?", Johnny continued to grin.
Simon shook his head.
"Oh come on!"
"No Johnny."
Johnny looked at him like a petulant puppy. "At least describe her.", he sulked.
Simon sighed and rummaged for a small photo in his pocket. The boy wouldn't stop anyway. He plonked it in front of the sergent and stared at it.
Johnny stared at the photo. "A goth chick?" Johnny reached for the photo, but Simon immediately pulled it back to him and put it away. Johnny looked at him in surprise. "Hot.", he grinned.
Simon just grumbled.
"Yes, I get it. I can see it. You fit together."
Another grumble.
Johnny grinned like an idiot.
"What?", Simon snapped at him.
"Does she have a friend?"
Simon just rolled his eyes. His cell phone buzzed.
A message from (Y/n). When he opened the message history, he saw a picture of a rabbit skull.
'For your collection?' it said underneath.
Simon looked at the picture. He had been glad, that she didn't see his little hobby as disgusting. But that she was now also participating in it. It was a beautiful bone. Completely intact.
'Beautiful. Where did you get it?‘
'Judas picked it up on our walk.‘
Judas was her dog. A stubborn but tough creature. It was probably her type.
'Put it on the ant farm. I'll bleach him when I come back next week.‘
'The three of us are waiting for you. ;)'
When he looked up again, Johnny was still grinning at him.
"The little one really has you wrapped around her finger."
Simon just raised an eyebrow.
"Good for you L.T."
Simon grumbled in agreement.

Soap
"What magazine did you cut that out of?" Kyle laughed.
Soap pulled off his boots. "Huh?" he groaned and looked at his friend.
Kyle pointed to Johnny's locker page and the photo hanging in it.
Johnny followed Kyle's suggestion with his gaze and immediately furrowed his eyebrows. "That's my girlfriend you douche!"
"That's never your girlfriend! She's far too pretty... Apart from the fetish make-up."
Johnny threw his boot at Gaz. "Don't talk about my girl like that!", he growled.
Gaz raised his hands defensively. A grin stretched across his face. "Oh come on."
Johnny continued to scowl at him. Simon came into the changing room and looked at them both wordlessly. Without another comment, he went to his locker.
"How can you always train with that thing on your head?", Johnny asked him.
"Habit.", came the curt reply.
Johnny rolled his eyes as Gaz clapped his hands with a laugh. "So you've got a type!"
Johnny looked at him in confusion. Simon paid him no attention at all.
"Dark and intimidating," Garrick winked at him and nodded towards Simon.
Johnny followed his gaze and a blush immediately appeared on his cheeks.
"I don't have a type!", he barked.
Gaz chuckled in amusement. "Sure."
Simon slammed his locker shut conspicuously loudly and disappeared just as wordlessly as he had come.
The two of them looked after him.
"She's very different from him.", Johnny grumbled immediately.
"Is she?"
"Yes, she's very reserved, but when you get to know her better, she's really funny. She likes to tell jokes, you know? Even if she's more into dark humor. And she likes her order, but accepts my chaos and she's not immediately put off by my job. Well, she goes to therapy, but she's actually really tough."
"Where did you two meet?"
"At a shooting range for my brother-in-law's stag party. She's really amazing. She could almost be a sniper and..." Johnny eyes widened.
Gaz grinned knowingly.
"Oh God! I'm dating L.T.!" Johnny exclaimed, overwhelmed.
"Really, how did you notice?"
Johnny threw his second boot at him. "What if I'm just trying to replace something with her?", he asked anxiously.
Now Gaz looked at him, confused. "What now?"
"Well... What if I subconsciously just saw her as a replacement. God I'm such an asshole."
"How many times did you try to enroll before you were finally eighteen?", Gaz asked him firmly.
"I stopped counting. What's that got to do with it?"
Gaz shrugged his shoulders. "You're nuts, but you know what you want. You've never accepted an alternative before."
Johnny looked at the photo in the locker. "No I never have."
Gaz nodded. "You clearly have a thing for mentally unstable Halloween decorations, but that doesn't mean you only want the girl as a substitute."
Johnny nodded. "Yeah, you're right. She's really great, you know?"
Gaz grinned. "I'll take your word for it."
"She always makes chocolate muffins, that look like the little coal men from Chihiro.", Johnny smiled at the photo. "And she can cook! I really put some weight on the last time, I was with her. It's almost like the good old times at grandmas.", he grinned to himself. "Even if it scares me a little, how relaxed she is with the house ghost."
"Please what??" Gaz blinked at him in surprise.
"The house ghost. She calls him Edgar. After the guy who built the house. She bought this old victorian house and at night you can always hear the back door banging open and shut and someone running up and down the stairs. But never up to the top floor. That was built on later. I nearly wet my pants the first night, when I went to see what was going on and this gigantic mirror fell on me. The thing was secured with six sturdy wall anchors! SIX! Well, I didn't set foot in the house for two weeks after that, but she says she's negotiating a deal."
Gaz looked at him with horror in his eyes.
Johnny shrugged his shoulders. "I'm used to it by now. But the noise is a bit annoying."
Gaz gave him a forced smile. "You see. You don't have anything like that with Ghost... No ghosts with Ghost."

Rudy
He was sitting in his small kitchen with Alejandro, listening to everything about Ale's last date, until they were interrupted by a loud noise.
Ale flinched in surprise and looked at the kitchen counter behind him. Rudy immediately ran to the counter and grabbed a cell phone. He wiped the green icon across the display and held it to his ear.
"(Y/n)s phone. Rodolfo on the line. - Yes, you forgot it here. - No, no problem. - Good. See you in a minute."
He placed the device on the kitchen table and looked into Alejandro's shocked face. "What? Was? That?"
"(Y/n) left her cell phone."
Ale looked at him like he was stupid. "What was that sound?"
"Her ringtone?" Rudy replied hesitantly. "Yeah... Her taste in music is a bit... special," he admitted, looking at the device again.
"A bit? It sounded like a pig had been tormented.", Alejandro said indignantly.
Rudy grinned. "Somehow that relaxes her." He rubbed the back of his neck, embarrassed. "I think the band was called... I can't remember. Lorna something."
Ale looked at him skeptically. "Wait. Is she coming over? I can finally see the mystery (y/n) with my own eyes?"
Rudy sighed. "Be nice, please."
"I'm always nice."
"Hmph."
Ale gave him an annoyed look. "I'll pull myself together."
"No subliminal threats.", Rudy stated firmly.
Alejandro started to speak, but didn't get the chance.
"And certainly no direct ones!"
The colonel fell back against the back of his chair, annoyed. It wasn't as if he had no manners. If anything, some even found his temperament attractive.
"Fine," he grumbled.
Rudy nodded in satisfaction as he heard the front door open.
"Hey." (Y/n) called down the small hallway.
Rudy stood up and walked towards her.
Alejandro didn't know what he had expected, but somehow he had always imagined her... pinker.
When Rudy spoke of his girlfriend, it sounded like he was talking about the sweetest creature on earth, who couldn't hurt a soul. Alejandro had envisioned a girl in a summer dress with pink lipgloss kissing Rudy on the cheek.
What he saw was a girl dressed in black. Transparent cut-outs, heavy boots and various buckles adorned her body.
Her lips, which Alejandro had always imagined to be pink, were painted black, just like her eyes.
She gave Rudy a quick kiss on the lips. "Sorry, I'm only here for a moment. Sofia got tickets for a concert today. I'd rather not ask how. Oh hi!"
She waved to Alejandro.
"This is Alejandro." Rudy introduced him.
He waved at (Y/n), overwhelmed.
"I'm (Y/n)." she replied quickly.
"You sure?" asked Ale before he could stop himself.
Rudy immediately gave him a warning look before turning back to (Y/n). "Be careful."
She kissed him again on the tip of his nose. "I'll text you when I get home. Bey Alejandro!" she called out and was already gone again.
Alejandro looked dully into the hallway. Rudy looked back with a raised eyebrow.
"Well I didn't expect THAT.", Alejandro said.
Rudy sighed.
"Oh come on! You described a lamb!" He threw his hands up in the air dramatically. "Not a little vampire. No matter how cute she seems to be."
Rudy sighed devotedly and sat down at the table.
"She's just like I told you."
"So... a black lamb?"
The corners of Rudy's mouth twitched. "Yes. That fits."
"To get back to the, let's call it 'music'."
"I don't get it either.", Rudy smiled with amusement.

König
"Little bat?" König asked his girlfriend cautiously. She was sitting in one of his shirts next to his legs in front of the couch, looking thoughtfully at her puzzle, while the movie of her choice was playing on TV.
"Yes Bear?" she asked without looking up.
His eyes darted to the television at a particularly organic sound, before quickly settling back on her.
"Um... I know I said 'My job is war and I can take more than nornal humans'."
(Y/n) looked up and grinned mockingly.
"But I admit that your warning was probably... justified."
She grinned at him openly. "No (y/n)! I've seen and done things-"
"All right!" he interrupted her. A woman on the television screamed. "Is this girl still alive?" he asked in disgust.
(Y/n) pressed a button on the remote control and the movie stopped.
"There's no way anyone could survive something like that," he huffed.
His little bat just took a sip of his coffee. "The lore is, that Art keeps someone alive ,until he's satisfied. He decides when you die."
"That doesn't make any sense."
"It's horror. It's not supposed to make sense." She patted his gigantic thigh. "You held out very well, but you dropped out of the movie. You lost the bet. You have to order today.", she smiled mischievously.
He grumbled and reached for the tablet.
"No! You have to call! That was the bet."
He looked murderously at the phone. He hated ordering food. Which made no sense, considering his job and his career in it. He was a grown man. He made most people afraid, but still. These everyday situations weren't exactly easy for him. It wasn't like it used to be, but it would never be normal either. Nobody had to like him in his job. No one expected him to be polite. In the real world, there were all these rules and unspoken regulations.
"Like always?" he asked her. She just nodded and went back to looking at her puzzle.
Sometimes it was funny. They both weren't the most confident when it came to social interaction, even though the world always thought they should be. Him because of his body. Her because of her look.
They had started making bets. The loser had to make phone calls or tell the waiter in the restaurant that the food was going back.
He ordered the pizza and felt (Y/n) put a hand on his knee. He had started wiggling his legs again. A habit that had always upset his mother. She stroked his knee with her thumb and he brought his limbs back to rest. With a sigh, he tossed the cell phone towards the pillow. It was nice that he didn't feel any anxiety with her. It was nice to have someone who gave him the space to find peace.
"What kind of picture is this going to be?", he asked her, stroking her hair and looking at the dark puzzle.
"Blackness."
"Blackness?"
"Yes. It's just black." She grinned.
"Why?"
"Because we as humans like to play God. The nice thing is... There's a reference picture."
He grinned. He loved how she was amused by little things like that. He loved his little bat. Her and her bloody pointless puzzle.
Free by Choice
Summary: Simon and (Y/n) don't want children. After his vasectomy, (Y/n) realizes how much the fear of becoming a father has inhibited him.
Wordcount: 1.010

She had never experienced Simon like this before.
"The tests look good. If you want to, you have green light."
As neither of them wanted children, Simon had decided to have a vasectomy.
As he had never had a relationship before and sex wasn't really a big issue, he had never given it much thought, but that had changed.
(Y/n) didn't want children either. They're cute as long as you can give them back. She was more than willing to be 'just' the cool aunt.
The decision was final for both of them. The pill worked, but this way (Y/n) could finally stop taking it and no one had to worry anymore.
"Good means absolutely safe?"
"Yes, Mr. Riley. Your last semen sample was positive... or rather negative."
Simon just nodded and held out his hand. The doctor tried to grab it, but Simon slapped it away and pointed to the papers.
The doctor handed them to him with a slight blush on his cheeks.
Simon skimmed the pages and nodded with satisfaction.
"Thanks, doc.", he mumbled.
The doctor nodded. "If there's anything, just let me know."
It wasn't until the evening, when they were both lying on the sofa, that it started. Simon began to gently kiss her jaw, letting his hands wander under her shirt.
If only she had known then, what was in store for her.
Three hours later she wasn't really sure, whether she still had a functioning brain cell. She was lying on her stomach, exhausted and drooling on the bed. She hadn't really come down from her last high when she felt Simon's lips on her back again. Her breath caught. Simon moaned with pleasure and a little laugh underneath. "Just one more little mouse. Seven is a lucky number.", he whispered in her ear and bit tenderly into the shell of her ear.
The next morning, everything hurt. Her thighs were covered in bite marks. Her back was a mess. Her neck felt like her thighs looked and all in all, she was mostly sore. No matter how gently Simon had rubbed her with ointment.
Surprisingly, he was still sleeping next to her. Usually he would have been up and away by the time she got up. He had already trained and made breakfast, but today he was lying on his pillow, slumbering, with a cute little pout on his lips.
She turned to him with a smile. What had gotten into him? They'd had good sex, but this? Despite being on the pill, he always insisted on using a condom. He usually never came more than once inside her. Despite everything, he often pulled out and came on her. She had just assumed he was into it, but after last night?
Had he been so afraid of having a child? Had this procedure taken such a weight off his shoulders?
He moves slightly.
His eyes opened slowly.
"Morning," he mumbled.
"Morning," she simply replied.
He rubbed his face and stretched. "Fuck. My back." he grumbled.
She laughed. "Serves you right."
He didn't answer that.
She snuggled against his shoulder. He buried his nose in her hair.
"You realize, you have to carry me everywhere today, right?"
"Hm. Anywhere you want."
"Why didn't you do this before, if it was weighing you down so much?"
He closed his eyes again. "I have a therapist for that kind of talk.", he mumbled.
She punched him lightly on the shoulder. "I'm serious."
He sighed. "I've never had a relationship and the one night stands were rare and sporadic." He shrugged. "Wasn't necessary up to this point. Sorry, if it was too much."
She kissed his shoulder. "It's okay. Just remember that, when I get ugly, after I get off the pill."
"Why would you get ugly?"
"Hormonal acne and hair loss are definitely coming."
He grinned. "I've been through the meat grinder once and you're worried about a few pimples?"
She pouted. "That's a sensitive subject."
He tousled her hair, "I'll help you squeeze them out, too."
She smacked him on the chest with a grin and no emphasis. He laughed.

Five months later
Simon looked at the nutritional supplement packs that had been piling up in her kitchen for the last few months.
(Y/n's) skin had rebelled briefly, but the worst of it seemed to have subsided. For two weeks, she had been in so much pain because of the inflammation under her skin that she had sometimes stood in the shower crying.
Simon had given her every bath that could even help in the least.
But now, two months later, it had subsided. Things seemed to be settling down, even if they weren't perfect yet. She had an appointment with her beautician today and Simon had thankfully stayed at home.
He was reading the newspaper, when he heard the front door open and close again.
(Y/n) came into the small kitchen. Her skin was still shiny from some cream, but she seemed to be glowing somehow.
Unimpressed, she threw her bag onto a chair and sat astride his lap. She immediately pressed her lips to his and wrapped her arms around his neck. Taken by surprise, he tried to figure out what was going on when she pulled at his shirt. He had no idea what was about to happen.
Hours later, he lay wrung out on the bed, breathing heavily.
"I want another round. When can you manage that?"
"Today?" He looked at her in shock. She nodded.
He looked up at the ceiling, shocked. "Nothing happens here for the next three to five business days."
She looked at him, pouting.
"What's gotten into you?" he asked, pulling her hand towards him, which was already exploring again.
"Not only is my skin fourteen again, but it looks like my libido is too."
"But I'm no longer fourteen mouse... My jaw hurts... And my back."
She grinned. "Will you at least take a bath with me?"
"At least? That was eight rounds!"
"Nine is a lucky number."
"Oh Fuck."