Confusion Rifle - Tumblr Posts

Enjik: “It’s a hybrid lost to the knowledge of the armories..... amazing... a surefire ticket into the Old Tower’s relic vault....”

BJ and Bonnie, simultaneously: “It’s a boomstick. You shoot shit with it. Discussion over.”

“This is a shotgun. Change my mind.”

“It uses a field-induction coil to accelerate projectiles like a railgun.”

“But it fires those projectiles in a spread. Doesn’t matter how it accelerates them.”

“It also fires a three-round burst. I suppose you think it’s also a pulse rifle.”

“Nope. Pulses first multi-round bursts of single shots.”

“You’ve been increasingly insufferable ever since you joined that VanNet forum about sandwiches.”

“The subtle distinctions between categories are crucial to the discrimination of meaning.”

“Funny, ‘cause you’ve been awfully indiscriminate about what you think does and does not qualify as a sandwich, and now apparently what is or isn’t a shotgun.”

“If there was a good argument it’s not a shotgun, you could change my mind.”

“Right now you should be worried about finding a good argument against luring some of Saint’s birds to shit on your jumpship.”

(Bastion)