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1 year ago
When A Vampire Hunt, A College Camping Trip And A Deranged Killer Collide, Romance Is Hard To Come By.

When a vampire hunt, a college camping trip and a deranged killer collide, romance is hard to come by. But this is Dean and Cas - they'll manage somehow.

Dean/Cas Horrorfest presents...

Dean & Castiel vs. Evil

Artist: @xfancyfranart

Author: @friendofcarlotta

Rating: Explicit

Word count: 31k

Tags/Warnings: Fusion with “Tucker & Dale vs. Evil” (2011), Horror Comedy, Hunters Sam and Dean, Blood and Gore, Minor Character Deaths (so many), Angry Hornets, Minor Cannibalism, Chainsaws

Summary:

Castiel is trying to survive a camping trip to the Appalachians with his annoying fraternity brothers. At a nearby cabin in the woods, Dean is trying to clean up the remains of his and Sam’s recent vamp hunt. Both Dean and Castiel wouldn’t mind exploring their mutual attraction.

But there’s a problem: due to a series of misunderstandings, Castiel’s friends are convinced that Dean and Sam are serial killers. Worse, as Castiel’s friends start to die in increasingly grisly ways, it becomes apparent that there actually is a killer on the loose. Will Dean and Castiel be able to find the killer? More importantly, will they ever be able to score some alone time?

Preview:

“The hell… did you even… do… to this one?” Dean asks, grimacing down at the vamp corpse they’re currently schlepping between them. It doesn’t just look decapitated — it looks fucking eviscerated. Half the torso is torn up, blood and guts spilling out in an untidy trail all down the cabin’s front steps and across the yard. They have to drag it by the legs instead of the arms, like they usually would. 

“Don’t know,” Sam says, shrugging as he pauses to study the mess too. He finally looks like he’s feeling the strain too, cheeks red and sweat pearling on his forehead, but Dean’s going to be the bigger man and not mention it. Or at the very least, he’s going to wait to tease Sam until he’s got enough of his breath back to do it properly. “Freshly sharpened blade I guess, and the guy moved right as I was swinging at him. Sliced clean through his torso.”

“Huh.” That may be true, but Dean’s also occasionally suspected his not-so-little brother of popping steroids to make him so freakishly large and strong. The current situation really ain’t helping Sam’s case. “Well, whatever. Let’s just get the fucker in the pit with the others.”

They move to do just that, but they don’t make it far. Because straight ahead, walking out of the woods towards them with a friendly smile and a dorky little wave, is Castiel. 

Dean can tell exactly the moment he clocks what’s going on — or thinks he does. The smile drops off his face, and his hand drops too, all of him seeming to sag lower all at once. He stares down at the mangled corpse Dean and Sam are dragging between them, blinking slowly at it, like he can’t quite believe this is happening to him.

Not that Dean can blame him. Of all the scenarios he dreamed up about him and Castiel meeting again, a badly disfigured vamp corpse didn’t figure into a single one of them.

“Fuck,” Castiel says — just that, but he gives it some real oomph. Like he’s never meant anything in his entire life the way he means that. 

 And then he spins around and runs for the trees. 

Just a couple of seconds too late, Dean finds his voice. “Cas, wait!” Cas? Where the hell did that come from? “I can explain!”

Cas, perhaps not surprisingly, doesn’t pay him any mind. He keeps running back towards the treeline, arms and legs pumping hard, and he—

—collides with a low-hanging branch. 

Cas goes down hard, sprawling onto his back on the forest floor, and Dean almost thinks he can feel the ground shake with the impact.  It’s like Cas said: fuck.

Coming this October to @deancashorrorfest!


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