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KAGET BGT... i just finished aka reread the whole series again 😍😍

Only Love: An Inevitable Epilogue | JJK

Pairing: Jungkook x (f.) Reader (ft. ot6)

Genre/Tags: exes au, parents au, baseball player!JK; slight angst, fluff, smut (18+)

Warnings: Making out, lots of pregnancy stuff, pregnancy sex, sort of impreg kink; family fluff

Word count: 13k

Summary: You knew early on that Jungkook would be a great father and husband and he proves that to you everyday. With a child on the way and his first time experiencing pregnancy with you, you both go through the growing pains of raising a family - with tears, more tears, and a lifetime full of love.

A/N: I started writing this 1.5 years ago, right after Inevitable wrapped up and finally, I finished it and can now share this with all of you. It’s a pretty special piece and I hope you find comfort in it the way you did with the series.

Also, I went wild with the photos. Thank you Pinterest and random people on the internet.

Series Masterlist || Previous || Completed

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SOBBING CRYING BC IT HURTS SO BAD.. 💔

When She Loved Me

[Summary]: How does one live when life is bound to end? 

[Theme]: Terminally Ill Reader, Non Idol AU, CEO Jungkook AU, Engaged AU, Married AU

[Rating]: 18+ for sexual themes and innuendoes, a truly heart wrenching piece. Please read with caution and with full intent to break your own heart. 

[Word Count]: 22,212

[A/N]: I truly broke my soul with this one. If you really want to cry, listen to my muse for this piece: “When She Loved Me” by Sarah McClain (yes, the one from Toy Story)

[Materialist]

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wicked • 16

↳ Summary: In a desperate hope to stop war from breaking you are a serviced to wed the most vile man alive, the one who has committed atrocities and war crimes beyond comprehension, he who is responsible for the fall of many nations, the wicked prince who’s heart is made of stone. You are to marry a man who challenges every belief and moral you stand for, all while being faced in a foreign land with nobody but yourself too trust…But are you both truly that different? Or is hate not too far from love?

↳ Pairing: Jungkook/reader

↳ Genre: arranged marriage AU, enemies to lovers, it’s kind of a period AU??? Historical but also technically not? prince!AU, eventual smut

Word Count: 10.8k

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Note: the queen has returned everybody! good luck

Wood echoed off of wood, clapping together in a viscous motion as Jungkook’s brows pinched together, frantic to stave off the aggressive blows. He was already exhausted though, training before sunrise until sunset, only to sneak out like this. 

It could get him in a lot of trouble- both of them for that matter.

He fumbled against a blow he deflected, stepping back only for his foot to hit a dip in the ground. 

The next blow came but his reflexives weren’t sharp enough to block it, resulting in the wooden sword slamming hard into his shoulder as he yelped out.

The breath felt as though it had been knocked out of him as he gasped for air, his back planted into the ground as his name was called- or perhaps the closest he usually heard to it.

“Your Highness!” Big brown eyes peered over him in concern, “I’m so sorry! I didn’t mean to hurt you.” 

Jungkook sputtered, long black hair accidentally getting in his mouth as he waved her away, “You didn’t hurt me Wheein, and stop calling me that!” He hurriedly sat upright before slumping a little.

Though Jungkook said it, it didn’t take away from the fact that it did hurt, Wheein hit hard, perhaps harder than she intended too. But Jungkook wouldn’t shy away from it, he needed to be pushed hard if he wanted to one day be a good swordsman. 

Wheein quickly backed away from him, kneeling down as she peered at him, still in mild concern, “But you’re the Crowned Prince.” 

This made Jungkook cross his arms with a huff, he knew he was the Crowned Prince, but for once he just wanted someone to treat him as a friend. He hated his title, he didn’t ask to be the next King of Penumbra, and he certainly didn’t ask to be drafted into this stupid war.

Just the thought had fear plunging into his veins like poison, he only had two weeks of training left before his official draft would begin. 

When his father told him, Jungkook knew better than to cry, though he wanted to. He kept it in, but still his father was repulsed at the sight of the boy groveling, begging his father to not send him.

‘This isn’t fair, father!’ He remembered crying out, his eyes filled with hurt and glassy, on the verge of tears he told himself he wouldn’t cry. 

And then his father’s response was even more vivid than his own.‘Life isn’t fair nor is it kind Jungkook, and you best be learning that as soon as you can.’

Just the memory made him clench his fists, and just as his father suggested, he decided to put all of his anger and frustration into training. But no matter how hard he trained, how hard he tried, how much he exhausted himself. 

It still hurt.His uncle, Jeong Dae didn’t seem to understand either, he had gone to him in some effort to lick his wounds and receive a bit of comfort, but his uncle only replied by telling him he should be honored to serve his country.

That this was his chance to prove himself to his people, to the Rosewood’s, to the world that he would be worthy of being King. 

The only problem was that Jungkook didn’t want to be King. He didn’t want to rule, he didn’t want to go to war and he certainly didn’t want to die. And no matter how much everyone tried to pet him, he could see past their empty eyes, they were sending him to his grave, he was certain of it. 

“Are you okay?” Wheein frowned, mirroring his own as she set down her sword, “You’re crying…”

Jungkook’s bottom lip quivered, both in anger and pent up sadness as he roughly shoved his tears away. How they had managed to slip out was beyond him, but he wouldn’t let it happen again. For his father, his family, and his country, he would do what was expected of him. 

His feelings didn’t matter, evidently enough. 

“It doesn’t hurt that bad.” He shook his head, ignoring her words, “You should get back to Skol before Di Jin catches you out here.”

Wheein’s frown deepened as she folded her hands together, taking one long look at him before she took a breath, “Alright, you should rest as well, I know the War Matron has been pushing all of the underling’s after dark now that there’s only a two weeks left until graduation.” 

Jungkook set his hands on his lap, “If they’d let you serve the war would be over in a day.” 

Wheein offered a small smile, “Maybe, but I’m not a boy and I’m not royalty either. Rest well Prince.” 

And with that Wheein grabbed her cloak that had been discarded, pulling it over her head to conceal her figure before she disappeared into the dark. Jungkook might have been concerned had it been anyone else, but he saw her take her wooden sword. 

He winced as he rubbed his shoulder, she could easily bludgeon someone to death if they made her angry enough, she’d be fine. 

Jungkook had sulked for only a little longer before getting up, rubbing his shoulder as he grabbed his wooden sword before sneaking his way back to the boys barracks. 

“You are an idiot, truly.” 

Jungkook hadn’t said anything for a long while, his gaze looking out over their great kingdom, the very same one his great grandfather built stone by stone, all for it to turn into this? And even despite the shitshow of a display earlier the only person missing from the parlor was his father. 

Perhaps unwilling to bother with such trifles at the late hour despite it being the Crowned Princess who had been missing. Jungkook had felt his whole stomach lurch when he had woken up, you missing from his embrace and he attempted to be rational at first, assuming you had gone on a late walk and taken Yoongi with you. 

But upon seeing Yoongi still on watch outside the doors had him immediately reeling, flashes of anxiousness and worry wrought in his entire being which came in lashes of anger to everyone around him. It didn’t matter what Jeong Dae and Areum told him in an attempt to calm him down, he wouldn’t be until you were found and safe. 

And the relief he felt when you came in, when he was finally able to hold you once more and see with his own two eyes that you were safe, it was in that moment that he knew there was no going back with how he felt. 

You had somehow entangled yourself in his entire being, somehow wiggling your way into the forefront of his mind every time you were apart and making him constantly have the desire to keep you wrapped against him. 

And yet he didn’t understand. Your words still coldly rang in his ears. Things could not be over between you both, they had hardly even begun, so surely, out of a fit of rage, much like you had in the past, said something damning in the moment.

Still, it troubled him deeply, Jungkook shook his head, “I don’t understand what I said wrong,” He frowned, deeply troubled by what had transpired, “It was the truth nobody else would tell her…”

He was honest when he said he took no pleasure in telling you the truth, but everything he said was the truth you so desperately wanted.

Your anger was justified, but why couldn’t you see from his side…? He was stretched beyond thin and Jeong Dae had only goaded him further into investigating you, he was the one who had planted a seed of doubt. 

But deep in the crevices of Jungkook’s mind laid bare his true feelings, ones he wanted viciously to deny, but still they lingered in the dark, perhaps the seed had already been there, Jeong Dae only watered it.

“You don’t…!?” Areum raised her brows, groaning as she ran a hand through her hair, “Good god you don’t understand why she was upset with you!? Jeon Jungkook! You don’t tell the women you love that you were justified in what you did!” 

“Then what would you have me do?” Jungkook snarled, his gaze finally snapping to hers. 

He already had one woman scold him tonight, he didn’t need another one to further it.

Areum puffed a breath, crossing her arms, “You could first start by swallowing your pride and admitting your’re wrong, and then you could move along to groveling for her forgiveness. But something tells me she won’t care until you genuinely mean it.” 

Jungkook’s lip twitched as he angrily shook his head, “She’ll be fine after she’s done throwing her tantrum. She’s prone to saying cruel things when she’s angry, she didn’t earn that title for nothing.” 

His words may be cruel, but they were a truth no one could dispute, Jungkook was the first to witness your wrath the very moment the door to your wedding chambers had closed. Though in time he grew to know you as you were truly seen by those closest to you. 

Tender to the core, there was such a profound air of softness about you that was constantly coiled tight like a venomous snake, hissing and ready to strike at anybody who dared get close to it. 

And yet again, Jungkook was struck by your venom this night. When you loved, you were like the gentlest, warmth of days, the embodiment of the sun in his eyes, incandescent and enchanting, but when you raged? 

You were nothing short of a thunderstorm, not the rain but the lightning that followed, striking yet again in a chaotic manner that no one, let alone he could predict. Your voice was like a war drum that would not be silenced. Areum only raised her brows at this, “Right…well, let me know how that goes for you little nephew. Betrayal is easily the deepest wound one can inflict, lest we all know that here. Goodnight.” 

She spoke with finality before she exited the room, leaving Jungkook alone with his uncle. 

Silence lingered in the room, the fireplace roaring with flames and wickedly dancing as Jungkook glowered in the coals.

He only wanted your safety tonight, perhaps if he had stayed asleep, this all could have been prevented.

“Are you satisfied?” Jungkook finally asked, “She hadn’t even sent a single letter out until she began writing to her mother to inquire about Yule.” It left an empty feeling in his chest as he crossed his arms, “She’d never be a spy, it isn’t who she is.”

You were many things, a dichotomy to the court. You were soft but sharp, merciful but unforgiving, hot and cold. But of all the things you were, Jungkook knew the one thing you were not, was indefinitely, a spy.

He was consumed by paranoia when he sent for your letters to be searched, in hindsight he wondered if he had calmed his mind down, he would’ve made a different decision.

Jeong Dae walked over to him, putting a hand on his shoulder, “You did what you must to yet again secure your seat to the throne, we would never be certain until you had it done. True as Areum’s words may be, the girl will come to one day understand your reasoning.” 

Jungkook said nothing in return, his eyes still cast out over the dark kingdom, “I hope you’re right.” 

“Get some rest Jungkook,” Jeong Dae replied, “You’ll need it in the days to come.” 

Jungkook was then left alone with his thoughts before he reluctantly returned to his chambers where it laid empty just as he had woken up earlier, the bed felt entirely too big and as he laid awake in bed, staring up at the canopy a feeling began to creep into his chest that felt entirely too much like regret. 

“Princess…I’m not typically someone who pries but…is there a reason we’ve been here all morning?” Yoongi had finally spoken up after taking you to the stables at the first light of day where you had been keeping Fenrir company. 

At first you had went on a walk with him before playing with him and now you had been resting in the stables for the last hour, tenderly stroking through his fur as he rested his chin on his paws, perhaps sensing your downcast mood as he licked at your hands occasionally in comfort. 

The pup had definitely grown, he was bigger now, to some guards uncomfortably so, his head was perched at the top of your stomach when he stood tall now.

“No reason in particular…” You mumbled, not wanting to talk about it at the moment. You had so many things and feelings to sort through, and admittedly you were not used to working through it completely by yourself. 

Not only were you having to deal with Wheein being unrightfully accused of being the assassin but now with the betrayal of Jungkook having investigated you as a spy behind your back along with the news of Eunoia.

It made your head dully ache in all truthfulness, it would have been one thing if Di Jin pounced on you with a dated piece of information, something you wouldn’t have put past Jungkook to do just after your wedding. 

But two weeks ago?

Two weeks?

You felt incredibly naive and stupid to believe, geniunely that you both were closer then this. You didn’t know how to feel, about anything anymore, and more than anything you were wrought with homesickness. 

You didn’t want the gray chilled days anymore, you wanted to go home. 

Yoongi sighed in exasperation as he nodded, “Very well, then let’s discuss why you thought it was a good decision to go outside the castle after hours, by yourself, telling no one of your status and meeting up with the sworn enemy of the crown!”

Your lip jutted a little, not appreciating the scolding, but it was a foolish decision you made and the least you deserved was this for that. One thing however caused your head to shoot up right, “How did you…?” 

It was one thing for you to admit to going to the Undeside, but how could Yoongi know that you met up with Claudin? He fled the moment he got you outside the courtyard. 

“I’m Areum’s right hand and before that an assassin, I have more eyes then just my own after hours.” Yoongi’s glare furrowed, “And to let that rat take you to the Underside, did you want a death sentence Princess?”

You glumly leaned back against the wooden wall, your hand mindlessly stroking Fenrir’s side as he sprawled out at the attention, his feet digging into your side but you paid it no mind. Had you not gone to the Underside you would’ve assumed he meant all of the looming assassination threats.

But after having gone, it was only now that you realized being assassinated was a lot lower on the list of ways you could potentially die in Penumbra then you had originally thought. It was undeniable that your eyes were opened to the truth. Just about everyone in this damn kingdom wanted your head on a pike. It was a bitter pill to swallow. 

“Well it’s certainly come to my attention that a death sentence for me is far more imminent then the court ever let on. If visiting the Underside was anything to go by.” You mumbled the comment that occupied your mind. 

Yoongi ignored your question, “Send me outside if it upsets you Princess but I’m going to ask anyway, why did you go with him?” You shook your head, lip twitching with anger just as he anticipated, “I had no other choice,” You finally spoke, eyes raw with rage, “Not a single person in this castle dared to tell me anything, it’s as if, I was living in a bubble this whole time, blind to what’s been going on in the outside world. I took no pleasure in going with Claudin, but he was the only one willing to show me the truth.” 

Yoongi frowned deeply as he crossed his arms, “And how is that cold truth treating you Princess? Being ignorant is a blessing few come by these days.”

Your eyes stung with tears of rage but you refused to let them fall, “That is a luxury I was never allowed to have as a child. I tended to the disembodied civilians of children, men and women alike, all left from the wars your country waged. I stoked the fires with their bodies and choked on the ash of their bones. Ignorance was never an option.”

Yoongi huffed shaking his head, as though he didn’t particularly enjoy hearing about the mess they caused without thinking twice, “How long will you weaponize the past against Penumbra?” 

You shook your head, “It’s not a matter of weaponizing, it goes beyond Penumbra, beyond myself, it goes back to the Age of Celestia, the moment the Dryads left this earth, the moment we were stripped from our grace. That’s when our eyes were opened to the world around us, it is our curse to bear. To be savage, tooth and fang and yet wholly crave the peace of the earth.”

“Call it whatever you may, but I would always rather the unpleasant truth than the sweetness of lies.”

Yoongi said no more, leaning against the side of the wall as he shook his head. 

It was silent for a long moment before you spoke up, not wanting to bid ill with him, after all he was your personal knight, or you supposed assassin was a better interpretation. He had every right to be upset with you, but you didn’t want any more bad blood to fester. 

“Last night,” You frowned, “When Di Jin came in, it was he who announced I went to the Underside.” 

Yoonig snorted, “A pot-stirrer that one, I’m not surprised.” 

“Neither am I,” You admitted, the little time you’ve spent with Di Jin would point to such, “But it was what Jungkook said to him in return. Something that insinuated Di Jin played a hand in the Underside…?” 

‘My wife would never step foot in that pit you caused.’

Jungkook’s words rang in your ears as you glanced at Yoongi, perhaps with him being Areum’s right hand, he would have more insight into this. Yoongi however only sighed as he ran a hand through his hair before he finally took a seat upon a bale of hay that was against the wall beside him.

“While I am still indefinitely angry at you,” Yoongi glared a little before it softened, “I also want to impart some knowledge on you, seeing how serious you take this whole truthful business. While what you saw in the Underside is very real, it is only a fragment of Penumbra as a whole. It is the depths of criminal activity and the most low or dangerous of people roam.” 

“Di Jin was the captain of the Guard during the five year war, but during this time, we had serviced many into the war to help, many volunteered as well, food had to be rationed and many mourned for their men and boys that would not return. But many men also resisted to help in the war, they flooded the streets with crime of all sorts as a way to rebel against the draft,”

Yoongi frowned as he recalled those days, “While the King was busy buried in the war room, Di Jin took it upon himself to create a prison of sorts in the lowest district in the city, him and his guard raided the whole Capitol at night and threw them all in there as some means of justice and restoring order.” 

You tilted your heads in curiosity at his words. 

“And I understand the idea he had in mind,” Yoongi admitted before scoffing, “But imagine it Princess, throwing all of the lowly thieves and murders together in one place? It’d be hell on earth, well instead of murdering one another like Di Jin assumed they would, they ended up couping the whole place. Tearing it down in troves and claiming it as their own little Kingdom, it is now shrouded from the Capitol in fear of who still roams there. It is without a doubt the most dangerous part of Penumbra.” 

“So what happened to Di Jin when they all took hold of the district?” You asked, almost eager as you sat upright from your previously slumped position. 

“Well he got decommissioned,” Yoongi grinned, as if it amused him, “Conducting something on that scale without the King’s permission was a one way ticket to it, not only that but thoroughly botching it too? Because Di Jin served in the war alongside the King, he allowed him to walk free. Otherwise he’d surely be rotting in the dungeon right now.” 

You grabbed your chin in thought, “There must be a reason Di Jin is trying to say Wheein is the assassin, I just can’t make sense of it…” 

“I wouldn’t think much of it truthfully Princess,” Yoongi said with a soft lament, “I feel as though, in some cases, it purely has to do with being at the wrong place, in the wrong time.”

Somehow this horrified you even more than if it was some clever plot, “Wheein does not deserve to die- let alone at the fate of being at the wrong place and the wrong time!” 

“But think Princess,” Yoongi urged you, “If Di Jin caught the ‘assassin’ he would be back in favor with the court and more importantly, the King.”

“Why would he want the King’s favor now though?” You wondered aloud, frowning at the idea, surely Dae Seong wasn’t blind to the idea that letting Di Jin into his court was a poor idea, let alone letting the man be an advisor to him.

‘Well…You said Di Jin was the one who announced you went to the Underside, did he say anything else…?” 

You thought on it for a long moment, “No he didn’t but…” you trailed off at remembering what Yoongi previously said, how he had more than his own eyes at night, “It’s more, what he didn’t say.” 

You felt a sense of dread fill in your stomach as Yoongi urged you on, “And what would that be?” 

“You said you knew I went with Claudin,” You replied, “But Di Jin…He didn’t mention Claudin at all, just that I had been seen there…Yoongi.” 

You turned to him, something akin to the realization in your face, “After Di Jin was decommissioned from the Captain of the Guard…he became a bounty hunter. The Wolf of the West.” Yoongi's expression twisted from confusion to shock and then to pure anger as he crossed his arms, “Perfect, now we have two rats to deal with. Best we set one trap for both Princess…” 

You nodded, “Yes...you are certainly right about that.” 

The idea of facing your husband once again at the table of Namjoon’s study was less than desired, but if your judgment was right, then you would simply have to put your hurt aside, for the safety of not only Wheein but for yourself and potentially the whole of the kingdom. 

“Are you ready Princess?” Yoongi asked, grabbing the handle of the door. Taking one deep breath to calm yourself you nodded before he opened the door for you stepped inside. 

The others were in hushed voices before pausing at the sight of you, all giving you a bow except for you at the end of the table. 

Jungkook. 

His eyes were unreadable as yours at the moment, but the coldness between you both was difficult to not notice. It was hard to imagine once upon a time, this was a normal interaction to you both, now you felt oceans apart. 

“Princess,” Namjoon spoke first, his eyes filled with both concern and curiosity, “We all received word about you urgently needing to speak with us, has something new developed.”

“It has not completely revealed itself but Yoongi and I were speaking this morning and happened upon an odd but…damning clue that’s been staring us in the face this whole time…” You frowned as you walked to the table, “Please sit.” 

Everyone did so as Yoongi pushed your chair, sitting at the opposite end of the table you chose to ignore his intense stare as you began to recall the events of the evening, leaving out most details of the Underside as you were simply too embarrassed to actually speak of what you had discovered. 

After explaining your thoughts and concerns to them Jungkook was immediately the first to speak, “I’m going to slaughter that man,” There was a deep rage in his eyes, “To have the audacity to parade around in my castle, pretend to be someone he isn’t at my court. Try to murder my wife.” It was hissed out, his fingers twitching as if wanting to pick up a blade and slit the man's throat this very moment. 

“Jungkook,” Namjoon ushered in a soft chastising voice, as if scolding a younger brother that was being too hasty with his decisions, “As the Princess said, we don’t know if this is the full truth. However it is the best lead we have and most likely right. But we need to play our cards right, Dae Seong favors him, it would be best to not go in accusing him of anything without any evidence.”

“So where does that leave us then?” Hoseok frowned looking in thought, “We’ve double downed on our efforts but whatever Di Jin is hiding, it’s locked tight.” 

“It would make sense though,” Jimin frowned, leaning back in his seat, his cheek resting on his palm, “Whenever I’ve spoken to him all he’s said is cryptic things like, ‘if you side with me you’re boon will be great’ or ‘just wait watch as the chaos unfolds’.”

“Chaos unfold?” Namjoon asked with piqued curiosity. 

Jimin lifted his hands in exasperation, “Don’t ask me, I never knew what the hell my old man was on about. What I do know is that he has always put himself first. So even if he is aligned with the Rosewoods, it’s only temporary.” 

“So what?” Yoongi asked, “You think if the Rosewood’s take the crown Di Jin would simply murder them and take it for himself.” 

“That's what I would do,” Jimin shrugged, “Take’s a bastard to know a bastard.” 

“If his information is locked tight then we need to dig harder.” Jungkook replied, he looked brooding and still very much angry, “I want eyes on him at all time.” He looked to Yoongi who nodded, “And Claudin as well, as much as they can without compromising their position.” 

Everyone nodded at this before the meeting was dismissed, everyone departing until it was three who remained. 

“Yoongi, leave us.” Jungkook still sat at the opposite end of you, not even sparing the assassin a glance. 

Yoongi however did not leave as he glanced at you, as if asking for your permission if you were okay with this. 

Did you want to talk to him? Not particularly, but he was your husband and this court was only so big, you would eventually have to talk to him about it, the idea of forgiving him made you seethe in rage though. 

You were tired of compromising, tired of learning, tired of having to be understanding. 

“You may wait outside.” You finally glanced at Yoongi with a nod, he then bowed before he exited, closing the door behind him. It was silent for a long minute as you glanced around the study, it was well decorated, maps lining the walls and bookshelves filled to the brim.

It was a quaint thing, not at all organized like the great library, but absolutely Namjoon, books of all shapes and sizes crammed together, some standing up right, others laid on their side to fit inside. 

You stood up to wander around a little in curiosity, ignoring the blatant stares of your husband before you finally settled at the window out looking over the woodland of the meadow. 

“It doesn’t have to be like Y/n…” Jungkook sighed, staring at your back, a sense of yearning in his chest, as if you were so close and yet so far from his reach once again. 

“No it didn’t.” You agreed coldly, folding your arms. He acted as if you’re the one being unreasonable here when he was the one who betrayed you. 

“All you have to do-”

“Yes I know!” You snarled, turning around as fury whiplashed into your veins once more, “All I have to do! Tell me Jungkook had I not been the one to apologize first to you, would you have ever given me a chance? Had I not been the one to swallow my pride, take the lashings from you even so. All I have ever done is give. I am done giving.” Your lips trembled despite the glares you both mirrored, “I have nothing left to give. I meant every word I said to you last night. I may be many things but I am not a fool.” 

“What I did was necessary to secure the crown,” Jungkook hissed back, angry and upset with your words, as if flat out refusing to believe they were nothing but the truth you spoke, “The world is engulfed in politics, all of that of Eunoia is only rumors, rumors you were better off not festering among the thousand other things we’re dealing with. But most of all, I am not your enemy Y/n.” 

You shook your head angrily, “That may be how you feel but that isn’t how I see it Jungkook, I had every right to know about Eunoia, even if nothing more then rumors. You may not be my enemy but you are certainly not my lover.” 

Jungkook’s lip visibly twitched, as if what you had said struck a nerve before he leaned in, eyes cold as before his lips curled in an icy smile, “That’s not what you said when you were moaning like a bitch in heat stuffed full with my fingers.” 

You ignored how hot the tips of your ears burned as your hands curled into fists, you had thought Claudin would be the only person who ever provoked you enough to consider violence and yet here you stand, silenting seething in rage as you glared up at your haughty so-called husband. 

You were above slapping him, but it certainly seemed tempting. So instead you say the next best thing. 

A cruel smile on your own dancing on your lips, “Perhaps because I was imagining it being my actual lover instead of you.” 

You were suddenly jostled around, pressing against the window with his chest against your back, a hand slithering possessively around your throat, “Funny because you were moaning my name the whole time.”

It would be a lie to say you weren’t shamelessly turned on right now, the sexual tension in the room was bursting from the seams, especially so with the visitation of your last intimacy together. 

But unfortunately for Jungkook, your pride would always outwin your sex drive. “You’re doing no favors for yourself right now.” You glared over your shoulder at him. 

You were unable to, however, as his mouth was already pressing a sloppy open mouthed kiss against your skin, his voice deep and breathy against the shell of your ear, “Then let me do a favor for you.” 

When you don’t reply he turned you back to face him, his lips pressing from your neck down your chest as his hands dragged from your waist to your hips, kneeling down in front of him. 

In the moment you couldn’t help but scoff a little, suddenly grabbing a fist full of his hair, yanking hard on it to make his eyes meet yours, what surprised you however was the moan that escaped his lips.

His expression may have remained neutral but you had gotten to know him too well, the slight part of his lips, his pupils blown out from lust. 

The gesture only made you more angry, “The fact that you think head is going to fix this is a joke better left unsaid. You had your chance and now it is gone. I have things to do, do not bother me again.” 

You shoved his head away from you before you stepped away from him, walking out the door without looking back. 

‘Are you ready to go Princess?” 

“More than ready.” 

“Would you like to visit Wheein meanwhile?” 

Your gaze shot up, “I can do that?” It felt like a stupid question, you were the Crowned Princess, it felt as if you shouldn’t even need to ask but given this was Penumbra, you didn’t know how things work. 

Of course you had heard of dungeons before but you had never been in one, nor did one even exist in Eunoia, the closest equivalent were called Repentance Rooms, and they were nothing like a dungeon, they were clean and well lit with barred windows captives could look out of. 

Comfortable even, they were for the liminal time between a captive being captured and trialed and if their punishment was severe they would be sent to the housing district next. 

You wouldn’t even know where to begin looking for a dungeon. 

Yoongi frowned at your words, “Well, you certainly can but last thing you want is for Di Jin to catch you snooping about.” 

“Can you make sure I’m not seen?” You stood up, folding your hands together as you stared at Yoongi pensively. 

His lips curled into a small smile as he kneeled down in front of you, grabbing your hand, “Of course, my lady. But just know there will be guards that are siding with Di Jin, if they see you they’ll alert him immediately.” 

Your face was covered with a hood and Yoongi had skillfully guided you along the narrow halls as you entered the lower levels of the castle where everything was dark and dimly lit, the smell of must becoming overpowering as guards patrolled each hall. 

Just the dim lights and dank smell made you increasingly worried, you had heard about dungeons before what it meant for captives in other kingdoms, but never thought you’d live to see one yourself. 

A naive thought once upon a time. But here you were, visiting your dearest maid who was being wrongfully accused of something you knew in your heart she’d never do. 

Yoongi had you hide in one last nook before he guided you to the very last dungeon, “Okay,” He spoke softly, “You’ll have only a few minutes with her, be brief.” 

You nodded as you crouched down, making your way to the gate, the sight broke your heart, you could hear a soft sob but Wheein was laid down on the ground, nothing but a pile of straw hay serving as a bed in a windowless cell. 

“Oh Wheein,” Your eyes immediately welled with tears, “I’m so sorry.” 

She jolted, scrambling to get up before she gapped at the sight of you, tearings streaming down her face before she crawled to the bars, “Princess.” She wept softly, before reaching throught the bars to you. 

Your arms curled around her as best as possible as she whimpered quietly, “I don’t want to die! Please! They’ll burn me! That’s what Di Jin will do, please!” 

“Princess,” Yoongi ushered out, “One more minute.”

“Shh!” You ushered, trying to keep your voice down as you pulled away from her, grabbing her soft cheeks in your hands, “We aren’t going to let that happen! Okay?” You nodded, “We’ll find a way to prove your innocence I swear by it Wheein.” 

Wheein only continued to cry, shaking her head, “He’s going to kill me Princess, I’ve dreamt of it for so long, I just know it.” 

You grabbed her hands into yours squeezing them tight as your heart ached seeing her in so many tears, “Not as long as I’m alive he won’t,” New determination rushed into your body, anger that hell had not rage against burning in your veins, “I swear on Galadria that I will serve justice where it is due.” 

“Princess! We need to go.” Yoongi whispered out, ushering you quickly. 

Wheein closed her eyes as tears trickled down her face but said no more, quickly you ushered her into one last hug before you whispered, “I’ll return soon! We better news than I have now.” 

“Please Princess, be safe.”

Those were her last whispered words before Yoongi quickly guided you back to a crook to hide as the guards made their rotation. Unfortunately for Wheein, you had no intentions of being safe, you were going to prove her innocence at whatever cost was needed. 

When you had first been told by the King, Dae Seong that you would be expected to dine with the family once a week, it had filled you with nothing but dread. Being among three men at the time was daunting.

Two which didn’t take you seriously at all, and of course the third, your husband who would either pretend you didn’t exist, or give you an icy stare and then proceed to pretend you didn’t exist.

But after the incident in the market place, Jungkook and you had somehow grown closer, fonder of one another, came to an understanding of one another and where you both had come from. 

Two weeks ago…

Your heart squeezed as you stared in the mirror, several maids floated in and out of your room and while you always tried to be kind, today you felt exhausted, only giving simple answers to whatever they asked.

What did you do two weeks ago that finally made him decide to have you spied on? You had gotten into an argument that week- at the time you thought it stupid but only now did you reflect back and realize Jungkook was venomously jealous of any inkling of an idea of Seokjin ever being your lover. 

Not only this but an odd inferiority complex he has that he would rather die than ever admit too. But…why? It made your eyes sting with tears that you refused to shed. You had said hurtful things during that argument but surely it wasn’t enough to make him do that? You’ve had worse arguments with him before that moment.

You just didn’t understand. 

“Finished Your Highness.”

The maid placed the crown on your head as you stared at yourself in the mirror, taking it in, it was heavier then it looked, but then again it was made of Noxtria metal, elaborately weaving with sharp, angles stones of onyx and metal winging out of it's sides and one large center piece in the middle.

The maids all courtesy to you, you offered a weak smile and thanks before they were dismissed. 

You took a deep shaky breath, wiping your eyes before any real tears had fallen. You just had to get through tonight, somehow, despite all of the time that had passed, it felt as if you were in some liminal space between how you first felt going to a family dinner and what it had slowly turned in too. 

Family dinner was expected tonight, however an additional note had been added on, Di Jin and close friends of the family would be attending tonight. Knowing your friends, and though you were upset with Jungkook- that they would be there brought you comfort. 

But having to deal with Di Jin all evening was not something you wanted to deal with. 

However, you were not about to cower away from him, your eyes had gone from mournful to near vengeful as you glared in the mirror, your hair elaborately done for the night by your request and a specific dress for the occasion. 

It had been hanging for a long while and you had truthfully shied away from it, feeling it was a bit too Penumbrian even for you. 

But not tonight.

It was a raven black gown, cold metal weaved into leaves intricately, an armored sweetheart neckline that wrapped all the way up to your throat, your upperarm dawned with cufflets that flowed with even more black fabric and a solid band of metal cinching your waist. 

Black had become a color of mourning in Eunoia, it was something you wore daily during the Five Year war while working in the tents as a healer. But something dawned on you as you looked through your gowns earlier in the evening. 

Before that, during the Age of Celestia, it was said that black was the color of power. Queen Celestia wore it for her ascension after devouring her husband, becoming the sole ruler of Eunoia. 

You didn’t like to think you took after the gruesome woman. But something that wasn’t often talked about was Celestia and Galadria were sisters. You shared just as much blood from one as the other. 

And right now, you wanted to wield power, not grief. 

Standing upright you were escorted down the hall, heads turned in your direction from various aristocrats to maids and servants alike as you kept your head held high and an unwelcoming expression on your face. 

The double doors were shut as per usual and though you had walked through them many times, tonight you felt just as anxious as you had the very first time as they opened. Every set of eyes at the table had turned to you, seeing as you had clearly interrupted the conversation that went on. 

Many at the table had quickly stood up, bowing to you, some more begrudging than others as your eyes locked onto Di Jin’s, his lip twitching a little as he bowed, your expression stayed as unwelcoming as before. 

You may not have been a Jeon by blood but you would certainly pretend you had their trademark cold glare tonight.

Taehyun who had been standing behind Jungkook’s chair had stepped back to pulled the empty chair out beside his, your cold look softened only a little for him, offering a brief tiny smile of thanks as he pushed you in. 

Jungkook had previously looked bored, crown of his own on his head, though from how he slumped in his chair it was just a hair crooked, dark hair dusting in front of his eyes as they met yours. 

And for the briefest moment you felt just a bit stronger having him by your side before anger quelled in you once more at the memory, two weeks, for some reason two weeks ago he chose to no longer trust you. 

Your expression remained as you looked away from him as the voice of Di Jin spoke, “It’s good to see the Princess can finally grace us with her presence.” 

“Yes, just in time for the meal, seeing as the conversation wasn’t much to look forward to.” A mocking smile curled on your lips, never before did you usually take pleasure in having power over someone, but you were experiencing many firsts in Penumbra. 

No matter how much Di Jin disliked you, he knew better than to openly disrespect you, no matter how hard he tried to undermine you in his discreet way. 

“What matters is the Princess is here now,” Jeong Dae’s gaze narrowed on Di Jin before nodding, “let us all dine now. Tell me, the progress on the market is coming along, yes?” 

You stared into your glass of wine as you swirled in, “Yes, they’re starting to lay the foundation down. Though I must confess, my servant being thrown in the dungeon has caused quite a bit of a mess in my schedule.” 

An uncomfortable energy had taken over the table as you shrugged, taking a long drink from your cup, you were not going to sit here and pretend along with everyone else that Di Jin had not done what he had.

“It’s a necessary precaution, once this assassin business has been taken care of you’ll have your servant back,” Dae Seong answered gruffly, not appreciating your lack of tack, “But should more incriminating evidence come out, a servant is expandable and just as easily replaceable.”

Your gaze slowly pulled to his as the silence at the table ensued once more, when had human life become so expandable as he said? 

You understood less and less as to why they felt this way, why they chose to believe this.

After a long moment your lips twisted into a grin that looked more like a grimace, “I thought you might say that your Majesty.” You however said nothing else as you took another drink from your cup.

The table was quiet for a long moment and nobody spoke, despite the silence it was almost comforting to you, to know that your words held some sort of weight to them even if it felt in the moment they were nothing more than an illusion to how you truly felt. 

“Not to interrupt this moment, but perhaps we should discuss the east, it's come to our attention that Kyoto has movement in the east, if they continue our progress will be delayed“ Jimin spoke up, a frown on his face with evident worry, “We've been tracking them down, and it seems they're making a sort of pattern, if I didn't know any better I'd say they were mapping out the best way to invade us.”

“That would be hasty on their part,” Jeong Dae spoke up, “We just passed The Rite of Peace this year, they wouldn’t be foolish to invade us just after the prince and princess wed.”

“Fools aren't so different from the brave,” Jungkook spoke up, swirling his goblet of wine in his hand looking rather bored, though his gaze occasionally went to you, as if hoping you would be looking at him, “ Would it be that outlandish to assume, that they do not care about the Rite of Peace?” 

“This is true,” Di Jin, surprisingly spoke up with agreement, “After all, why would the world let a nation as glorious as us live for one simple girl.”

There was a certain amount of venom in his tone that did not surpass you, though you didn't let it disturb you as it once may have. you suppose somewhere along the line, that you had gotten used to an unsurpassable amount of hatred that for some reason people in Penumbra felt entitled to take out on you.

it was a ugly truth, but it was the truth nonetheless, and Di Jin had a point, no matter how unpleasant it was, why would the world let a nation that had killed countless people, destroyed homes, decimated nations live on, if there is one thing you had learned in Eunoia, it was that you were indeed replaceable.

Dare you say you felt almost as if you were a sacrificial lamb, sent to slaughter, and whether you died by an assassin or by an invasion, did it ever truly matter in the end? You weren't sure. 

Jungkook did not speak, but he didn't need words to convey his feelings, his glare was enough to display his displeasure in Di Jin’s words.

Hoseok cut in, “Perhaps, but if they were to invade, there's no telling what kind of uproar it would cause with other nations. Especially if they kill the princess in the process, even if it is only one person, nobody can deny the influence Eunoian Princess has.” 

“Regardless, it would be wise to have a plan.”  Namjoon said diplomacy and his voice as he attempted to steer the conversation into a less hostile direction, “The people are restless, and with word having gotten out about Eunoia training soldiers along with Kimhae, and now Kyoto, they'll need guidance especially as winter approaches.” 

You sharply inhaled, trying to not let anger seep through your veins again, though tempting, just the idea of Eunoia training soldiers was outlandish, ever since the Age of Celestia soldiers have been out of the question, if the rumors were true why would they start now?

Nothing made sense, you tried to ignore the stares, but it was evident that people in the room did not trust you, after all even your own husband felt he could not trust you at one time. 

Two weeks ago, no matter how hard you tried your mind kept going back to two weeks ago, what had you done two weeks ago to warrant his distrust, what could you have changed to have changed his mind.

Just the thought made your heart ache and for a brief moment your anger had subsided.

“It would only be right to assume that Eunoia and Kimhae have their own plans to invade us. it would be within our best interest to strike first if that is the case.” Di Jin lifted his goblet before taking a long drink.

I'm just like that your anger had returned.

But before you could speak, your husband had beat you to it, anger evident in his voice as he spoke, “When we wrote the Rite of Peace, we promised Eunoia protection should someone ever threaten Invasion on them, they are honorable, if they desire to have their own protection let them have it, but do not sit at my table and claim loyalty to my family, and then proceed to disrespect my wife and her country in front of me.” 

Di Jin laughed, “You've got a lot to learn boy, love rarely saves anyone and the few bastards it does, life has a certain way of shortening their lives.”

“And men who disrespect women, tend to live even shorter lives.” Jungkook said, his voice having grown a little darker and expressionless, his fingers now drumming against the table as if aching to reach across it and wrap his knuckles around Di Jin’s neck.

“Regardless of Kimhae and Kyoto, I can only speak for my own nation, and I can swear this we are pacifists by nature, we do not desire for nor want bloodshed, but do not mistake our heritage, we do bite back should we be provoked, after all, history proves that.” You spoke, your voice calm, “Should we be treated fairly, you will only expect kindness in return, for that is who my people are, while I understand your caution, we created the Rite of Peace for its very name, to bring peace to the world and put these past grudges to rest. And I intend to keep it that way to the best of my ability.” 

“It seems you've all mistaken this dinner, we are here to gather and make merry not discuss politics,” Dae Seong looked much like his son, bored by the conversation, “We will not strike first, nor will we feed into their antics, after all this was the very reason I recalled the march to the East, there is no reason to wage war when our enemies have been defeated.”

You glanced around, noting the expressions on some of your friends' faces, it was evident just about nobody agreed with Dae Seong in one way or another, But nobody dared express how they felt, after all he was the king. 

The dinner had went on for the rest of the evening without much of a hiccup, granted it gave you a headache and you had found yourself sunk back into your chair the whole time, more than anything you wanted to get out of your seat and away from your husband, who had been staring at you with puppy eyes most of the evening.

Occasionally you'd watch his fingers twitch as if aching to reach out to you, to pull your chair closer, to brush your hair from your face, or to fix a piece of your dress that I've been wrinkled, but he knew better rather he kept his hand in his lap or against his cup, his sixth glass might you add.

In some ways you understood that this was perhaps unfair on your part, the more you thought about it the more you realized that you could have confided him and you had chosen not to, this was in some ways your fault as well but it did not take away the hurt you felt, that you felt you were closer than this.

But it seemed you both were wrong in many ways and you weren't certain of how to fix this, if you even wanted to fix this anymore, what you did know was that you were at a breaking point, you were uncertain of how much more you could take before you would break.

And every time you thought it couldn't get worse it without a doubt somehow got worse, but surely you would hit a plateau, your husband had lied to you, your servant was on trial for your attempted assassination, and you found out your home country was enlisting soldiers into a military, to say your life had fallen apart was an understatement.

Or at least that was how you felt.

You had been sat in bed, a book in hand though you hadn't read it all evening, and once again no matter how hard you tried to focus a book was just a book, and words were just words, you could read but the sentence just kept going over your head each time you read it, no matter how hard you tried, you just couldn't focus.

A knock at your door however had drew you from your thoughts causing you to stand up reluctantly before trudging over and opening the door

The person who stood before you was unshocking to you, after all it seemed since the unsavory reveal of his deeds your husband could hardly stay away from you, no matter how many times you would ask him to give you space, in fact he seem to be doing the opposite these days.

“I know you don’t wish to see me-”

You abruptly tried to shut the door but his arm caught against the door. 

“Y/n just listen to me,” Jungkook’s voice was weak, hair brushing over his eyes but the desperation in them was pathetic, “Let me talk, please.” 

“You’re drunk Jungkook,” Your teeth gritted but you didn’t try to force the door anymore, your hand still curled tight against the knob as you glared at him. He reeked of liquor and it was evident as his white shirt had a large inky red spill down the front that had been dried out, this was his sleep shirt which meant he hadn’t stopped drinking even after everyone had retired. 

Jungkook had one hand still flat against the door keeping it ajar and the other on the frame as he peered down at you, “I just wanted to see you, to tell you in my own words, I was complacent about your feelings, about my own. I have no excuses left, I have no words to defend myself, only my desire to be with you.”

You shook your head, trying to not let your heart twist further in pain, you wanted to look past this, to let it go, but how could you? Spying through letters was the first step, how could you know this wasn’t some elaborate plan all along to use you?

“It’s not that easy Jungkook,” You tried to contain the grief in your voice, guilt eating you up the more you thought of your own actions, “I should’ve trusted you more, confided in you about what I heard from Claudin, but I didn’t. I think it’s best if whatever this, does not continue.”

It was Jungkook’s turn to shake his head, his knuckles curling against the door, “We’ve both made mistakes. Forgive yourself Y/n and forgive me. Let me prove myself to you, let me earn your love.”

You roughly brushed the tears from your cheeks, “We were never meant to be together Jungkook, you know that just as well a I do-” 

You were cut off abruptly by his hand suddenly snaking through the small gap of the door,  wrapping around your waist and his lips immediately pressing into yours in a devouring hold, a surprised whimper escaped you at his iron hold increasingly becoming tighter on your waist. 

Your head was telling you one thing, but your heart was so desperately wanting another.

His other hand immediately snaked around your throat in a firm grip, not tight but not loose as you tried your best to not give into the temptation to melt into his hold but it was becoming more difficult when his tongue had pushed between your lips in determination. 

You broke, unable to resist the soft moan that escaped you as you felt your back push against the wall, arms wrapping around his neck before curling into his soft locks, giving them a soft yank as he moaned into your mouth,

You could taste the sweet wine still lingering on his lips, the unmistakable feeling curling into your stomach as you let yourself surrender to him for the briefest moment, and for the brief moment, everything felt better.

Two weeks ago…

The realization quickly followed after you and anger kindled in your veins once more, your hands had quickly slid to his shoulders to push back against him, “Jeon Jungkook!” You broke the kiss by turning your head with a hiss. 

Jungkook didn’t relent though his forehead pressing against yours as he heaved a breath, “What have you done to me? Some ancient dryad magick?” He gave a mirthless smile, “You are all I can ever think about from the moment I wake up to the moment I go to bed, seeing you cry makes me want to kill whatever is causing them, I’m drowning in you my sweet doe. I’m intoxicated and desperate so indulge me,”

“Tell me what I need to do to earn your forgiveness.” Jungkook ushered out, wet kissing being placed on your neck as the internal battle waged war in your head, one part of you wanting to immediately crumble but the other was indignant, this relationship surely would not end well.

At one time when you were younger, you would have laughed, after all you were married. But your eyes had been opened, things were never that simple, not when one was a Princess, marriage was contract, love was a luxury.

He broke away from you only a little, almost nose to nose with you and hair hanging over his eyes like a cloud, “I thought I knew love, I thought I knew many things before I met you,” His hands trembled as if the emotions were too powerful, “But it turns out I know nothing. Without you, I know nothing.”

“Jungkook…” You ushered out quietly, shaking your head as you tried to swallow down the hurt that began to bubble once more. 

“I feel like I’m being consumed by you,” Jungkook confessed, his hand squeezing your neck ever so slightly, his thumb rubbing softly along your windpipe, “It feels like you’re very being is sucking the soul from my body. And now that I’ve had you,” His voice broke only a little, his eyes like steel as he whispered a growl, “I would die without you.” 

“Jungkook!” You whispered out frantically at the sight of him letting you go only to kneel down on both knees. 

“Let me repeat my question; what do I have to do to earn your forgiveness?” Jungkook’s eyes burned with a bright intensity that nearly frightened you, his hand stroking up your thigh, “Is it Wheein? I’ll get her back for you. I’ll burn this entire fucking kingdom and rebuild it if I have too.” 

Was he hearing himself right now!?

You were panicked at his words and his actions, he had pushed his way into your room but the door was wide open, anybody could walk down this corridor and overhear him! “You can start by getting off the ground and going to bed!” You hissed out panickedly, flailing your hands to gesture him to stand, “And give me some time to think about it! Jungkook I…so much has happened I just need time! There’s no reason for you to say something so damning!” 

“I mean every word I’m saying.” Jungkook’s voice was serious, his eyes burning into you as he gazed up at you. 

It was silent for a long moment and Jungkook’s gaze did not lighten, hesitantly you lowered a hand down to his head, running your nails through his hair, it caused his lids to lower until they closed, his forehead resting against your thigh, hands still delicately trembling against your thighs.

“If you want my love so desperately, then give me time and space,” You whispered out, “You’re right, we’ve both made mistakes, and they can be forgiven, but forgiveness takes time that cannot be rushed.” 

“I can’t lose you.” Jungkook mumbled out, his weight slowly sinking into you. 

“You won’t.” Your words however went unheard as he slumped down, before collapsing to the ground, passed out. 

You stared down at him for a long moment before you sighed, “I’m sorry but you’re not spending the night here.” You stepped over him as you walked to the door, glancing around, the guard at your door must have been dismissed by him. 

You were in luck however as a pair of guards were at the end of the hall, walking quietly as they spoke, you flagged them down, requesting they find Taehyun and then have your guard returned to your door. 

Shortly Taehyun had arrived, the poor boy looking half asleep himself as he took in his Prince’s slumped figure on the ground, “He didn’t cause too many problems did he, Princess?” 

You shook your head, “No more than he usually does, I apologize for interrupting your night Taehyun, thank you for taking him back to his room.”

Taehyun offered a tired smile, “Of course your Highness, have a restful night.” He hauled Jungkook up with a groan, and briefly you wondered if Taehyun could even carry him, but he did manage to get him out the door and you supposed that was good enough.

Taking a shaky breath you sat back down in your bed, deciding you would be reading deep into the night, as you surely wouldn't be getting any rest regardless.

It was late morning and you had been eating out on the second floor terrace, the day was slightly warmer but still gray and cloudy, it made you depressed and you briefly wondered just how Penumbrian’s coped with it. 

But then again, they knew no different, for them, this was normal. 

You envied that.

“You mind if I join, Princess?” 

You twisted in your seat at the sight behind you, “Areum, of course, please have a seat.” You gestured to the empty table. 

You had been sitting out here alone, Yoongi on the inside as you wanted a moment to yourself but deep down you felt alone and you deeply missed Wheein’s company, each passing day made you more anxious, and the gap in your heart widen even more. 

Many questions filled your head, how would you set one trap to catch both Di Jin and Claudin in? You were not in a favorable position either way, Di Jin had a personal connection to the king and Dae Seong would need a damn good reason to believe you.

And you would have to be extra careful navigating Claudin as the Rosewood ties with the Jeon’s was already strained, one weak accusation and it could cause a civil war. 

“You seem so sullied these days Princess,” Areum commented as she sat next to you, promptly grabbing a plate and stacking it with rice cakes.

“I miss when I first arrived here,” You admitted, “Things weren’t complicated the way they are now.” 

“Perhaps,” Areum agreed, “But my, my, look how far you’ve come. I heard from your husband this morning. He looked dreadful.”

Your lips curled into a brief grimace at the memory, he looked rough last night, you couldn’t possibly imagine what he looked like when he woke up, no doubt hungover and upset. 

“What of it?” You felt slightly nervous, had someone overheard Jungkook’s over dramatic declaration last night?

“He asked me to take you to the Jeon Estate,” Areum smiled at your surprised and confused expression, “The estate was created for the royal family during the early days of Penumbra when the castle had yet to be built. It’s no longer used regularly, but occasionally we still hold family celebrations there for privacy. It’s deep in the woodland forest, past the Seer’s refuge.” 

“...May I ask why?” You frowned, uncertain of how to feel about this, there was so much at stake, how could Jungkook just expect you to leave…?

Areum smiled, “Something about wanting to allow you to have space and piece of mind. I understand your feelings Princess, I can’t imagine the weight you must be feeling right now, and I certainly wouldn’t blame you if you want to stay here at the castle.” 

Areum tapped her chin, “However I will say this much, the Estate has something primal to it, some may even call it magick. If you are seeking answers, there is no better place to meditate than there.” 

“I’ll think about it.” You nodded as you gazed out over the meadow in thought. 

Perhaps time away from the castle and Jungkook would serve you well.

hi there I hope you're doing well ❤️

Can I request a jungkook arranged marriage drabble with angst where they were forced into it the oc hopes he can one day love her but until then her only term is that he respects her and their marriage but when he starts warming up to her and show a different side of himself she starts thinking the marriage might actually work but when they attend a family event she finds out his been cheating the entire time with his ex the person he really loves and was forced to leave because of her... could the prompts be "You did a wonderful job convincing people that you love me, I almost fell for it" and "how am I supposed to love you when I never had feelings to begin with"

thank you in advance ❤️

why yes you can, sweet anon!! thank you for asking so kindly :)) i took some creative liberties with your prompt, hope you don’t mind! i like some good angst but super sad endings just aren’t me. but bittersweet? now that i can do ;)

make your own request here using these prompts

requests are closed

a night and a year

jungkook x reader, (briefly) ft. ex!yoongi 

word count: 3.6k

genre: angst (with a resolution), fluff, arranged marriage!au

summary: you knew this was coming, you’re just surprised it hurts so much. 

warnings: swearing, alcohol, perceived infidelity 

a/n: shout out to this anon for having to wait this long. i love you and thank you for your patience! i hope it’s okay 

Your heart skips a beat. 

“What the hell?” Jungkook jerks away from Sana, eyes wide with panic. You look back and forth between them frantically, anger bubbling up into your chest.

“Y/N, I—” 

“No,” you say through clenched teeth. “Don’t try to defend yourself. Just get it over with and we’ll talk later.” You let go of the door handle, your fingers tingling slightly from how hard you were gripping it. You tear down the hall before he can stop you, eyes pinned on the floor in front of as you beeline for the car. You’re barely conscious of how your eyes are welling with tears and other party guests are asking if you’re okay, noticing your sudden mood change. 

One thing. One thing you asked and you couldn’t even trust him to do that. 

Is it too fucking much to ask your arranged husband to honor your marriage? The one thing either of you had left? Apparently so, because you just caught him with his ex and you’d barely been at the party an hour. 

It isn’t like you wanted this. The marriage hadn’t been so much of a business move or a way to strengthen family ties as it had been a punishment. Jungkook for dating outside of his family’s preferences. You, for nearly taking down your parents’ company from the inside. The memories, though long settled, still feel fresh.

It’d been an accident. You thought you were doing your parents a favor, you thought you were doing your relationship a favor. You didn’t realize what the reporter’s motives were, not until the USB was in his hands and it was too late. What you thought would be a fluff piece was nothing short of an exposé.

The ensuing article had been explosive. It tore your parents to shreds, criticized their legacy and questioned their abilities, even making lame attempts at criminal accusations. It didn’t take long for the source to be traced back to you and for you to be berated and insulted beyond belief. You’d tried to explain that it was all a mistake, that you were trying to do a good thing, but it didn’t matter. Your parents were much more focused on exacting revenge and saving their reputation to listen to you.

Everything came crashing down soon after. Because Yoongi’s parents owned significant stock in the newspaper that hurt your family. It’s why you agreed to meet with the reporter in the first place, to strengthen your relationship with Yoongi’s family and your own, back when you, naively, thought that the reporter was looking out for you. Your parents burned all their bridges with the Min family and were about to do the same with you, but the stupid part of you hoped that even after all of this you’d still have Yoongi. 

You got nothing more than a phone call. His parents said it was his inheritance and career or you. So Yoongi made his choice and walked away, leaving you alone. You didn’t exactly blame him, he’d spent his whole life building his career, pouring effort into his family business. He was good, you saw it. But that didn’t make his choice any less heart-shattering.

Marrying Jungkook was your last chance to prove yourself, a quick arrangement thrown together by your parents in an effort to save face. It was the least you could do, they said, after everything you’d done to them. 

You’d been foolish to think you could be anything more than unwilling spouses and barely business partners with Jungkook. You’d been determined to keep up the wall, determined to protect yourself. But sometime over the passing months, that goofy smile and sweet nature had cracked through, had melted the places you thought were long hardened. For just a moment, you’d thought things could be different. You were wrong. 

“You don’t get to do this. You can’t just walk out without letting me explain.” 

You’re fumbling with the car keys when he says it, struggling to unlock passenger door when angry tears are blurring your vision. You scoff, not bothering to look at him, the only further indication of his presence being his heaving breaths. He must have raced after you, must have been worried you’d tell someone. 

“Oh, don’t I?” you snip, mashing the unlock button with all your might but to no avail. “I find my husband with his hands all over his ex-girlfriend and somehow I’m in the wrong?”

“What?” He pauses and you curse yourself for knowing he’s running his hand through his hair without having to look. “No, I didn’t mean it like that, I just—”

“You know, you did a wonderful job convincing people that you love me, I almost fell for it," you say, words biting as you shoot him a glare. “Joking about us having kids, kissing me when it wasn’t necessary. I really believed you there for a second. Great job.”

“Wait, love you? Is that what you wanted?” There’s something desperate in Jungkook’s voice as his expression sours. “How am I supposed to love you when I never had feelings to begin with? When you—"

You scream in frustration, dropping the keys on the ground as you spin to fully face him. He looks as much of a wreck as you feel. 

“I wasn’t asking you to love me,” you explain, clenching your fists. “I asked you to honor our marriage.” You bite your lip as the tears start to spill, cursing the way you have to stop every few words to breathe. 

“I didn’t ask for you to be my friend,” you manage, swiping at your eyes. “I didn’t ask for you to cut yourself wrapping a birthday present to surprise me or make me pancakes when I’m sad or memorize my take-out order. All I wanted was for you to respect this— this arrangement.”

“I did,” Jungkook sighs, ruining his carefully styled hair once and for all as he tugs on his dark locks. “You don’t get it, we—”

“Shut up!” you shout, causing heads to turn from down the street. “Haven’t you humiliated me enough tonight? Stop. Just stop.” You bury your head in your hands, sobs wracking through your shoulders. Jungkook sighs, wordlessly grabbing the keys from the ground, unlocking the car. Normally, he’d get your door for you but you don’t give him the chance, sliding into the passenger seat and fixing your gaze out the window as he drives home. 

The city passes by seamlessly as you hug yourself tightly, willing yourself not to make a sound until you’re safe under the covers and Jungkook can’t watch. You’ve shed enough tears in front of him.

When Jungkook pulls into your parking spot underneath the penthouse, you move to exit the vehicle quickly to save yourself the embarrassment, but your husband grabs your arm before you can. You jolt at the touch, flashing him a glare. 

“Just listen to me for a second,” Jungkook says earnestly, though at this point you don’t know whether you can really trust that look anymore. “Nothing happened. I swear to you. You can ask Sana, anyone.” 

You scoff bitterly. “Are you serious? I saw—”

“Her parents are cutting her off,” Jungkook explains. “I wasn’t supposed to say anything but I would have told you anyway, you don’t spread that kind of stuff around. We dated a long time ago. I don’t feel that way for her anymore, neither of us do. I’ve been helping her out over the past week, she was having a hard time tonight and I hugged her. That’s all. I promise.”

You swallow hard, gaze intense as he refuses to break eye contact. “I promise,” he says. 

The story makes sense. Unlike you, Jungkook never seemed too hung up on his ex, regarding the relationship with a quick shake of his head or helpless shrug whenever it came up, which was rare. But you suppose you can’t exactly be sure. 

Jungkook must see the doubt in your expression, because he continues, hand sliding down your forearm to clasp onto yours. 

“My phone died but I’ll show you the texts when we go in, if you want,” he offers. “I wouldn’t do that. To either of us.”

You sigh, gaze shifting to your lap. “Okay,” you whisper, trusting him against your gut. “I believe you.”

Jungkook gulps, feeling a bit awkward as he draws his hand away and fiddles with the steering wheel. 

“Can we talk about the stuff you said earlier?”

You stay silent, eyes trained on your fingernails as you pretend to find them interesting. Jungkook sighs, asking the one question you really wish he wouldn’t. 

“Do you love me?”

The air in the car is stiff and heavy, tension palpable. It’s difficult to take a full breath, to expand your lungs without feeling like you might choke. 

You scoff, glaring at the car window cynically, as if it’s what just asked you the insanely personal and relationship-breaking question. 

“I’m not fucking doing this right now, Jungkook,” you snap. “Don’t be an idiot.”

“Well, when are we gonna do this?” he asks, voice desperate and thin. “How long am I supposed to be in the dark with you? You’re like a fucking brick wall sometimes. One minute you like me and the next you won’t even talk to me and I can’t keep up.”

You roll your eyes, falling back into the seat. “Are you serious? I’m not your friend, Jungkook. This isn’t a fucking sleepover where we talk about our feelings. We’re married and we don’t want to be. It’s as simple as that.” You hate the way you sound, words biting and cold, devoid of empathy. 

“Is it, though?” You huff, missing the way his eyes have gone glassy. “We don’t deserve to feel like this, you know. Maybe we could—”

“Yes, Jungkook. It is. Don’t try to misconstrue us as anything else.” 

After a long silence, you get one word. 

“Fine.”

You’re met with the slam of the car door, Jungkook striding off towards the elevators without looking back. The keys still sit in the ignition, an invitation for you to take some space for yourself. Or to drive away and never look back. Though you aren’t sure you’d make it very far. 

You sigh, rounding the car and collapsing into the driver’s seat, guiding the vehicle out of the parking garage. There’s a hotel a few blocks away, you’ve driven past it before. Hopefully no one from the party is staying there tonight, or else you might have to make up some shitty excuse about having the floors waxed or running into an air conditioning issue to explain your night away from home. You try to keep your thoughts focused on the road ahead, but they wander against your will. 

Do you love him? You don’t think so. But you certainly care about him more than you should. More than you wish you did. Maybe it was the time he surprised you with a birthday present, knowing you wouldn’t want a party or a big fuss, just to cheer you up. It’d been a replacement of your favorite hoodie, your comfort clothing item. You didn’t know he’d seen you ruin it, didn’t know he was ever aware of the little things you cared for, but you were touched. Or maybe it was the time he nearly burnt down the apartment making dinner for you two when you’d both had long days and all the take out places were closed. Maybe it was the casual arm around your shoulder at parties or the encouraging, lopsided smiles he flashed you in meetings or the childish competitive nature revealed only during spontaneous rounds of Smash at 2 am that made you realize something had changed. 

He’d done the thing you’ve always been much too terrified to do. He’d opened up, lowered his walls, let you in. It always felt like he wanted you to do the same, when he teased you about your take-out preferences or criticized your character choice when he coaxed you into gaming with him. Jungkook had no problem with vulnerability, whereas for you, it was the one thing that made you sick to your stomach. How could you, when every time you gave yourself to others, they chose something else instead?

No longer did Jungkook feel like a stranger, like he was miles away. In those moments, when your husband had managed to pry a giggle out of you and broke into a massive grin that crinkled into his eyes, Jungkook felt closer. Like a childhood keepsake you can’t bare to lose. Like home. 

And that scared you. It scares you now, still. 

We don’t deserve to feel like this, he’d said. You cut him off before you had to hear, but you think you know what he meant. All those times he’d tried to comfort you, to draw you out of your shell, they meant something to him. You’d always managed to blame it on his personality, to convince yourself that he was just a thoughtful person, you were merely the one who happened to be around to benefit from it. But there was a small part of you, one that you tried to bury, that suspected (or maybe hoped), that he saved these moments for you and you only. That he wanted to be more than strangers, wanted to give meaning to the marriage neither of you ever wanted. 

You’d tried to reciprocate the sentiment, just once. 

A few months ago, Jungkook had accidentally sent you a message meant for one of his employees, one jokingly complaining about how none of them would be eating tonight if his dad kept extending the meeting the way he was. You happened to be standing outside of one of your mutual favorite restaurants, so, on a whim, you ordered enough for the both of you and walked to his office building, a little skip in your step. He surprised you with food often and you finally had the chance to return the favor. 

You’d been too dramatic, you realize that now. When you stumbled, dropping the take out bags down the stairs and spilling the food everywhere, you hadn’t once thought to maybe text Jungkook back or simply order more food. To you, it was a reminder that you’re a screw-up. You couldn’t do even the smallest of things right, what made you think you could do this?

You went home on an empty stomach with an aching heart, wondering why you got so caught up in your own head. 

You suppose that’s what you’re so afraid of. That Jungkook has latched on to the little bit of good he sees in you and the minute you show him the ugly, the fuck-up you know you are, he’ll realize he doesn’t care for you so much after all. 

Against your will, your thoughts settle on him, on how he’s feeling right now. You wonder if he despises you, if he thinks you’re some emotionless monster that can’t find it in her to have a mature conversation. 

Then, a terrible thought occurs to you. 

You wonder if he’s lonely in the way you feel. If he’s curled up on the couch or hunched over his desk tugging on his hair wondering what he’d done wrong. You laugh humorlessly because yes, that sounds exactly like him. In his eyes, you might as well have rejected him. Told him he wasn’t good enough when it was you that was the problem. 

And, well, you can’t have him thinking like that. 

You turn the car around. 

“I don’t love you,” you tell him when you find him just where you suspected, furiously tapping at the game controller like it’s wronged him with his eyes glued to the screen. 

He jolts at the sound your voice, having been too focused to notice you entering the room. He pauses the game, looking at you with reddened eyes and pouty lips. 

“That’s not what I was trying to say earlier.” You take a deep breath, settling on the couch next to him and staring at the pause screen. “I just care about you,” you admit to him, and yourself. “I thought you broke your promise, yeah.” You chew on the inside of your cheek, struggling to find the words. “But I don’t think I was all that surprised. I kind of expected this to blow up in my face. Like everything else.” 

You glance at Jungkook briefly, catching him nodding at you slowly with wide eyes, taking in your every word without a hint of judgment. 

“I was more surprised that I cared,” you say with a mirthless chuckle. “Like, actually cared. I didn’t know I did.” 

Jungkook echoes your laughter softly, thumbs drumming on the controller.

“I don’t think I knew you did either.” 

You nod. You suspected as much. 

“I’m sorry,” you offer. “For freaking out on you. But I do care about you. A lot. I’m also sorry for not making that clear enough.” Jungkook shakes his head, brushing off the apology.

“Can I be honest with you?”

“Of course,” you say, shifting towards him to give him your full attention. 

“I don’t love you either.” You both laugh, albeit weakly. “But I don’t want to keep going on like this.”

You cock your head to the side slightly. “Like what?”

“Neither of us wanted this, I know that.” That much is obvious, your honeymoon was the least passionate event you’d ever experienced in your life. “But it’s where we are. And I just think we should try to make something of it, you know? We don’t have to be alone all the time. I’ve got your back. You know that, right?”

Your eyes unexpectedly water up and you think Jungkook looks a bit emotional too, leaving most of what he truly means unsaid. 

“I care about you,” he says. “I don’t want you to shut me out. I’m really sorry about Sana, I should have told you earlier. But I want you to be able to talk to me without it being awkward or an argument and for us to be more than... than whatever we are right now. Maybe one day that could be love, if we worked at it, but I just don’t want either of us to keep feeling like this. I know you’re miserable, I see it all the time. If I’m being honest, I am too. But I always feel like you’re so far away and I’m not sure how to get closer. I want to be closer to you.”

You swallow hard, quickly swiping at your eyes. Jungkook takes one of your hands in his, thumb brushing across your fingers. 

“Do you want that too?” 

You nod. “I do.” More than anything. “I just—” You sigh, cheeks heating as you glance away from his face. “I’m just scared that we’re going to end up getting hurt. Like tonight.”

Jungkook hums in understanding, contemplating the thought for a moment. 

“How about this? If in, say, a year, after putting in some work together, neither of us are happy being married, then we get a divorce. Simple as that.” You whip your head towards him, eyes bulging out of your head. 

“What? No, you can’t be serious. Your parents, my parents—” 

“We’d figure it out. I’ve got plenty of money that I earned myself. I’d take care of us or I can talk to some friends who would help the both of us out.” You open your mouth to protest more, but Jungkook is too lost in the plan, nodding and smiling to himself. “I could call up Taehyung. He wouldn’t care, he’d probably be overjoyed. He’s got his own company now, it wouldn’t be a problem.”

You sit in silence, processing the idea. You know Taehyung too. He could probably secure you both with jobs easily. 

You don’t tell him this, but with the way he smiles at you, you don’t think he’ll need even close to a year before you’re head over heels. You can only hope he feels the same. 

“Okay.”

Jungkook starts to break into a tiny grin before he stops himself, moving to grasp both of your hands. “But you have to promise me we’ll both try to make this work. You have to be honest with me. You can’t just shut me out when things get difficult. We have to actually talk about stuff. And our feelings and all that sleepover bullshit.” He laughs slightly but his stare is intense and the promise is daunting. You aren’t sure you can give him that. 

But— “I can try,” you say, you promise, giving his hands a little squeeze. 

Jungkook smiles unabashedly, swinging your hands in between the two of you. 

“Great.”

You stare at him for a moment, basking in the overwhelming calm you feel. 

"Now let me destroy you in some Smash,” he jokes, shattering the mood as you giggle, taking an extra controller. 

“Hey, I might win this time,” you argue. 

Jungkook shakes his head, nose scrunched slightly in disgust. “Not if you keep playing as Isabelle.” You gasp in mock offense. 

“What’s wrong with her?! She’s cute.”

“She’s a poodle with a mallet. And one of the worst characters in the game.”

His words make you smile. It won’t be the last time.

DITTO ➢ jeon jungkook

summary: you’ve got everything you need right now, amazing boyfriend, amazing job, amazing friends, but when you receive life changing news you’re not sure how to bring it up to your boyfriend. your indecisiveness and failure to be open with him puts a huge toll on your relationship and he just wants to know that if he continues to love and walk the same path as you, you’ll do the same and ditto.

➢ established relationship [angst] boyf! jk x girlfriend!y/n [she/her. female anatomy]

➢ 12.9k words

warnings: teaser. soft boyfriend jk but relationship issues. smut. angst. fluff. separation anxiety. bath sèx. unprotected. oral (f and m). rough but sensual sèx. doggy. reverse côwgirl. y/n has trouble making decisions. heavy makeout. jk is literally perfect idk. not a break up story but they do take a break. dog parents. happy ending. [not a pregnancy fic] [haply ending]

song inspo: wasted affairs — minds eye , ditto — newjeans , still with you — jungkook , another (demo) one #2 — mac demarco

*interact to boost story if you like it!!! greatly appreciated <3*

It started on campus, exactly a year and ten months since the two of you started dating. You didn’t even talk that first day past a quick apology for bumping into each other before carrying on with your lives. A couple days later you found him on a dating app, he was attractive but that’s not why you swiped right on him. If anything you thought he was out of your league, the only reason you swiped right was to see if he had done the same. Imagine your surprise when you matched instantly and later on that night he sends you some cheesy joke that probably worked on all the girls he sent it to. You remember being thoroughly unimpressed and you told him so too.

He was just supposed to be one of those guys you talk to while you’re bored and then ghost when they try to meet up. It just didn’t go as planned when you saw him on campus a couple days later and he didn’t shy away from approaching you, practically following you to the bus stop and everything.

You don’t know how it happened but somewhere between going out for drinks on your first date to sharing the same laundry hamper, you realized you really love this kid. You were practically inseparable after that first date and although you haven’t been dating long, you hate being apart. It’s not even a crazy obsessive, ignore everyone else sort of way—it’s more that you just genuinely enjoy each other's company all the time. You don’t even have to talk or look at each other, just knowing you’re there is what makes a difference.

Now this doesn’t mean you haven’t gone without seeing others since you started dating. You did live separately at first and after graduating, Jungkook did a two month apprenticeship back in Busan so you couldn’t be together then either. Yes, he was coming down practically every weekend and calling or texting you throughout the day, even delivering food to your place from an entirely different city, but you had still been apart. It just feels better to be together entirely, y’know?

“What?” Jungkook asked with a little smile as he watched you squirm. You sat on the kitchen counter with a bowl of cereal that matched his. You were in a loose top and his boxers, your hair was pinned back but still messy. Your breath was still nasty from sleep and you had mismatched socks on, yet this is his favorite side to see of you. The chance to see each other in such a way felt oddly domestic. It didn’t feel like you were just his college sweetheart—it felt like you were his lifelong partner. Now you’re looking at him with this smile on your face as he stuffs his face with Lucky Charms and he just has to know what’s up.

“Nothing,” you said as you dug around in your bowl, “I was just wondering what we’re doing today.”

“Whatever you want,” Jungkook said as he placed his bowl in the sink waiting to see if you were done too and when you passed him your bowl he began washing them, “But we agreed to go to Joon’s place later for grilling.”

“Let’s do something you want to do till then, last weekend was my turn,” you told them as you hopped off the counter. You could see the corners of his lips turn upward in a side smirk making your eyes narrow. He looked over at you.

“I mean… if you really want to do what I want, I don’t think we’ll be leaving home at all,” he said with a wink that made you roll your eyes.

“Last night wasn’t enough? I’m sore,” you said as you picked up the mail from the tray and began to sort it, looking for coupons or something. He watched you separate it into a pile for him and then a pile for you.

“Never enough, I’ve got the stamina of a rabbit,” Jungkook said, lifting an arm to flex his bicep. You laughed lightly, “How manly.”

“Okay, okay, we need to get groceries today, I’m out of my protein,” Jungkook said more seriously, “We could probably get lunch, take Bam on a walk, it’s super nice out today.”

“Then Joon’s tonight?” You asked for confirmation and he nodded. When he finished washing he came over to where you were. His hands found your waist and immediately pulled you into his front. You whine when you hit his hard chest but your arms make their way around his neck anyway. He smiled down at you, “I love you.”

“Ditto,” You smiled leaning forward to kiss him but he tilted his head back, “Come on baby, I wanna hear you say it. I know you love me too.”

“Jungkook…” you said, still smiling. You felt this gross kind of love for the guy. You know the kind where you’re looking at them doing the most basic thing ever yet in your mind it’s like, ‘damn, I really love them’, then you cringe because why would you be so vulnerable to even think that? Yeah, that kind of love, it’s still hard to say it sometimes.

“I love you too,” you told him almost shyly and then he began to squeeze you in his embrace. You groaned at the tightness until his lips were on yours. It was short and sweet, just a quick moment of affection before you were pulling back. He released a light chuckle, “Your breath stinks.”

You scoffed, “You think yours smells any better?”

“I do actually,” he smirked as he let you pull away from his hold, “It smells like your pus—“

“Go shower!” You said making him laugh as he went to do that and left you alone in the kitchen. Normally you would join him but you had other things to worry about at the moment and you didn’t need Jungkook around for it.

You went into the living room, opened your laptop and checked your emails. You went to school for journalism and you’ve spent over a year interning at a well known editorial company. They specialized in digital news but they had a few actual magazines out, it was a global company and Jungkook had been so excited when you got the internship. He went as far as throwing a little party for you with all your friends.

Today is the day you’ll get an email telling you if you landed one of the open positions in the company, there were too many interns and too few openings so you’ve been stressing about it lately. You’ve yet to tell Jungkook but only because you’ll feel like you’re letting him down if you don’t get it. Your heart was beating out of your chest when you clicked on the right email thread and read it to yourself.

Jungkook was very confused in the beginning. One would say he was a player all throughout high school and the start of college. His longest relationship before you was a mere six months and he wasn’t mature during it. When you came along he thought that maybe it would just be a little fling before the two of you moved on, but the more he talked to you the more he realized neither one of you was going anywhere. Now, he understands that you haven’t even been together for two years but he can easily say that you’re the one, you just get him.

Sure, you argue here and there but you don’t hurt each other. Your communication is amazing, like that of a married couple that has been together for over a decade, and there’s just no stress with you. He knows what to do when you’re upset or how to make your eggs in the morning. You know when he’s running low on multivitamins and you make the calls for Bam’s vet appointments. Sometimes Jungkook even thinks Bam likes his mom, aka you, more than his dad. That’s that Jungkook has had him longer than he’s been dating you. Overall, you just fit into his life like the missing puzzle piece that completed him.

“Come on Bam, we gotta go inside,” you said later on in the day. You and Jungkook just came back from taking him on a walk at Han River and he was way too energized. You were already running a little late and you still had to feed him. Jungkook brought him over easily and the three of you went up like the little family you are. Jungkook watched you lovingly as you filled Bam’s dog bowl and got him water before washing your hands.

“Ready?” Jungkook asked you as he stood at the door with the keys. You nodded, looking around to double check everything was right before the two of you left for the evening.

Everyone was at Namjoon’s place before you two and his backyard smelt like grilled meat and a bonfire. Lawn chairs were spread throughout and there were two coolers of beer. You grabbed one for you and Jungkook and he pulled you onto his lap in one of the chairs.

“No, listen, I’m right,” Taehyung said as he talked with his hands. You looked over at the girl to your right, “What’s he going on about?”

“Oh you missed it, him and Hobi have spent about ten minutes arguing over which soda is better,” Yuna said with a little laugh looking just as amused as you, “So far Hoseok’s winning with a fair argument for Sprite.”

“Mountain Dew is better,” Jungkook cut in with a mischievous grin as the other two turned to glare at him and point their anger in his direction. You tried to smile as you leaned back into his chest. His hands were around your waist resting on your thighs, pressing his chin against your shoulder.

Yuna was Hoseok’s girlfriend and the closest friend you had out of everyone. You met her after she started dating him but you quickly befriended each other through mutual interests. Aside from Jungkook, she probably knew you better than any of the others—even your own personal friends. You’re not sure if you were being obvious about it or if Yuna had been wondering this all along but she knew some sort of news came.

“Come with me to the kitchen,” Yuna said as she stood up, “I brought dessert but I need help carrying it out.”

Without question you nodded and Jungkook released you from his hold so he could have a better debate over fizzy drinks with the others. The two of you headed inside Namjoon’s house and once you were alone in the kitchen, the questions began.

“So?”

“So?” You asked as you looked around for this dessert. Yuna crossed her arms over her chest, “Have you heard from the job?”

“Oh um,” you cleared your throat feeling a lump form as you looked back to see if Jungkook was still where you left him. He was sitting in the chair with a huge smile on his face as he tipped back his beer for another drink. “I got the job.”

Yuna gasped loudly as she grinned, excited now, “That’s great! Oh my god I’m so happy for you, what did Jungkook say? Are you guys doing anything to celebrate?” Her smile dropped, “Why don’t you look happy about it?”

You didn’t say anything, feeling your eyes begin to water and you had to step further into the kitchen so the others wouldn’t see you. Yuna followed you watching as you nearly broke down crying. She panicked, letting go of her drink to get close to you, “What’s wrong? You got the job… that’s great. It’s what you’ve wanted for a long time now an—“

“It’s abroad,” you finally said, “Like thousands of miles away and it’s not short term, it’s forever. The pay is great and I would get a high position but… but…”

“Have you told Jungkook? I’m sure you’ll work it out, I swear the guy would follow you to the end of the world if you asked him to,” Yuna tried lightening the mood, “Didn’t he write that cheesy song about walking the same path as you? He’ll be happy to go with you.”

“I can’t ask him to,” you admitted as you tried wiping away the tears, “He’s already put the down payment for the studio, all his clientele is here. His friends are here, his family is here. I can’t ask him to pack it all up and go with me. We’re not married, we’ve only been together for a little over a year. It would be selfish of me.”

Yuna looked at you with sincere sympathy, “So what are you going to do? Are you taking the job? It’s what you’ve wanted…”

“I know,” you sniffled as tears kept falling, “But I don’t know.”

“Aish! I heard you! Paper plates and napkins, I’m going!”

Jungkook’s voice was heard clear as day and just so happy as he closed the sliding glass door behind him. He was tasked with the job of bringing out silverware since you were inside and he was asking for you. They all told him to come in and find you, and bring back plates for them while he was at it. That’s why he came in with a huge smile on his face, “Babe?”

Yuna’s bewildered eyes matched yours and you turned to face the sink acting like you were busy as you forced yourself to stop being so emotional. Jungkook’s feet dragged on the floor as he came over spotting Yuna first. When his eyes landed on you he felt his heart leap, “There you are—“

He stopped himself when you refused to look back at him. It’s like he could sense that something wasn’t right. He shifted his gaze to Yuna, “What’s wrong?”

“Oh um,” Yuna looked at you and you couldn’t let her say anything, so you turned around facing him with your reddened eyes and puffy nose. Instantly Jungkook came to you, cupping your face softly, “Hey, hey, what happened?”

You tried to smile, “Nothin—“ “Don’t tell me it’s nothing, what’s wrong?” His voice was a soft whisper, immediately going into protective boyfriend mode, “Do you want to go home because we can leave right now.”

“I’m fine, I swear, I’m just… stressed,” you told him and it was obvious he didn’t fully believe it but he didn’t want to push it either.

“Jungkook! The plates!”

“Get your own damn plates! I’m busy!” He shouted back almost aggressively and Yuna took that as her cue to leave you two alone—even though you wished she didn’t.

“I’ll take them the plates,” Yuna said, using it as an excuse to leave and Jungkook didn’t even look in her direction as she left. His focus was solely on his girlfriend and why you looked so sad right now.

“Baby, talk to me,” he had a sad pout on his face, “Please? You were fine in the morning and I don’t know, yeah a little quiet around lunch but then we took Bam out and you were happy, so what happened?

“Did Yuna tell you something?” His jaw was clenched. He knew Yuna would never say anything to upset you but his protective side was coming out and all he knows is that you’re crying and Yuna was the only one with you. You shook your head, “No, no, I’m just stressed you know, um, about work.”

His brows furrowed like he didn’t fully believe you before trying to relax his expression, “Work? Is it because of the opening? I know you’ll get it, there’s nothing to worry about. You work your ass off and they’d be stupid not to give it to you, so please don’t cry—you’ll make me cry. You wanna see me cry?”

You laughed with a small sniffle, “It’s okay, I was just worked up but I’m fine now, let’s go back out.”

“You sure?” He asked wiping away the last year from your eye with the pad of his thumb, “We could go home, watch a movie. Oh, we can try on those new face masks, Bam loves them too—wanna know why? Because his mommy makes sure it’s on right and he gets his nails painted in the process. You’ve made him high maintenance, y’know?”

He’s trying to brighten your mood and it was working because you were laughing.

♱

It was a quiet night yet he couldn’t fall asleep. The room was dark and the air was on, his girlfriend slept peacefully next to him and yet he couldn’t go back to sleep. He slept for about two hours before he woke up. He’s just had a lot on his mind these last couple of days and he just can’t seem to figure out what is happening. He stared up in thought feeling his arm grow numb from having it under you.

Unable to clear his head, he made the decision to move his arm out from under you so he could stand up. As quiet as he could, he left the bedroom and went straight to the kitchen pouring himself a glass of water.

You seemed different these last couple days. From the moment he picks you up from work to the moment the two of you go to bed. It's not that you seemed ill or anything but you did seem stressed about something and no matter what he does to make you feel better it’s not working. He knows it’s probably about work but he had absolutely no doubt that you’ll get the job so he doesn’t want you stressing over it.

He wishes you would just talk to him. He doesn't need you to rely on him because he knows you wouldn't, but he'd like for you to realize he's here for you. If it was about work he hopes it all gets settled soon. If it was about him he's not sure what he'd do.

In reality, there's absolutely no reason for you to be upset with him. The two of you have a healthy relationship and it's no question that you deeply care for each other. He loved you so much, and you love him just as much so why can't you just confide in him?

"Jungkook?"

Oh. He was still in the dark kitchen grasping his half empty glass. He looked to the bedroom where you must've noticed he was missing. Shaking his previous thoughts away he finished up his water letting his glass sit on the counter. With a stretch of his arms toward the ceiling and a small yawn he was walking back to the room. He could barely make out your figure but he could see the way you were turned to face the door.

He quietly climbed back into bed feeling you shift a little as you mumbled, "Where'd you go?"

"To get water, come here, let's go back to sleep," he whispered back to you as he tucked himself in next to you. He went to pull you into his arms but you turned the other way instead. He could practically feel the distance you were putting in the middle and just like that all the thoughts were racing back to him. So were you stressed because of him?

"You can't sleep?" You asked drowsily, he nodded knowing you couldn't see him before rasping out an answer, "No."

It went quiet between you two as he continued to stare at the ceiling unable to get tired. You were already half asleep but you could tell he was struggling tonight. Without much debate you turned on your other side to face him and moved closer. His eyes shifted down as you began to snuggle into him and he was quick to turn on his side too. The two of you met halfway and your limbs locked with his while he hugged you to sleep.

He looked at your closed eyes, feeling the way your breathing evened out in relaxation while in his arms. It was so late and you probably had to work early and yet here he was troubling you by being awake.

"Jungkook," you whispered, your voice a little raspy too. He looked down at you, "Hm?"

"Go to sleep," you muttered under your breath. He sighed, "I'll just go to the living room and watch some tv until I can sleep. I know you've got work early."

He didn't give you much time to process what he was saying before he was getting up and leaving. You laid in bed, eyes opening a little watching him leave. You were left alone in your shared bedroom and the guilt was just eating at you. You knew you were being distant but you just have no idea how to even bring up the news about work. You don’t know how he’ll take it, but you do know you don’t want to leave him and make him think he’s the one doing something wrong.

You were sitting up now, yanking the covers off as you padded across the hardwood floor out the door. Jungkook was laying down on the L shaped couch watching a movie on a low volume. His phone lay on his chest, an arm tucked behind his chest and the other on the remote.

He looked over to the bedroom door when he heard it open. His eyes were big and rounded, innocent looking as you shuffled over to where he was. He didn't question it when you were sitting on the edge of the couch moving to lay over him. He welcomed you with an arm around your waist as you snuggled into his chest. He reached out for the remote, lowering the volume all the way as you let your eyes shut. A small smile appeared on his face as he made himself comfortable on the couch to fall asleep.

"Y/n's just, I don't know, distant?" Jungkook huffed, he raised the dumbbell with the help of Hoseok spotting him. "I feel like something's wrong. I can't tell if it's something I did or what and it's driving me crazy."

Since this morning he hasn’t been able to stop thinking about this. What if he was the problem? Why else would you be acting like this?

He finished a set with a puff of his chest trying to catch his breath as he was standing up. Hoseok took his spot, "Did you forget a birthday? Dinner? Anniversary?"

Jungkook shook his head no as Hoseok began his set, "Are you crazy? I would never forget any of that stuff, if I did Y/n would kill me.”

"Maybe she's not even upset, maybe Y/n's just stressed or tired," Hoseok huffed, "Try and give her time to talk, you know she doesn’t keep secrets from you. Maybe she’s just trying to figure out how to bring it up so just give her space.”

"I can't," Jungkook shook his head, "If I do she’ll never open up to me, trust me. Y/n’s not the vulnerable type.”

It's true. Jungkook knew you all too well. Since the beginning he had to be the one initiating any contact. He never understood why you doubted yourself but you never made the first move, not even when Jungkook had very specifically informed you he liked you. You're always worried you'll come off too clingy and you just don't get that it's what Jungkook wants. He’s way more affectionate than you and it does not mean you’re not like that with him but he’s way more open about his feelings than you—always has been.

"Then I don’t know what to say man, Yuna is an open book, she’ll tell me anything," Hoseok stood now next to Jungkook as they both took a small break. They were practically done for the day anyway so they left to the men's locker room. Jungkook bit his lip nervously, "Has she told you anything about Y/n? They were together at Joon’s when Y/n was crying. You think you can see if she knows anything?”

“I’ll try,” Hoseok said as he reached into his locker for his gym bag, “How’s the studio looking?”

Jungkook appreciated the attempt to change the subject and went on to talk about it, “Great. All the new equipment came in and I’ve already got some clients registered for CrossFit training. Thankfully since it was an old gym I didn’t have to make much changes on it.”

“That’s great man,” Hoseok said with a warm smile, “See if Y/n can do an article about it in the magazine.”

"Nah, she’s stressed, I don’t want to give her more work especially if she had to run it by her bosses first," Jungkook tells him as he takes his helmet and tucks in his underarm. It was a nice enough day for him to ride his motorcycle today and since he isn’t picking you up from work he can ride around a bit and try to clear his mind.

"True," Hoseok told him as they exited the large gym. Jungkook walked over to his motorcycle, a slick black with polished silver detail. Harley Davidson plastered on the side. His helmet was black too, it matched the silver with a chrome reflection and it fit him perfectly. You got it for him over Christmas.

"So you’ll ask Yuna then?" Jungkook asked honestly.

"I’ll see what she knows," Hoseok told him as he walked to his car, “Get Y/n flowers, that might cheer her up.”

Jungkook sat comfortably on his ride as he put his helmet on. He nodded, waving the man away as he turned the key for the ignition. Without wasting another minute he was walking his bike back before taking off out of the parking garage.

Once he was at his apartment he jumped in the shower, music blaring as he tried getting ready to work. It’s his last week of teaching classes at his local gym before he can put all his focus on his own business. He’s had a lot on his plate too.

Hoseok got to his place a while later, his girlfriend was already home watching tv in their living room when he came in, “Hey.”

“Hey,” she said tilting her chin up as he planted a kiss on her cheek in greeting. Her nose scrunched, “Go shower.”

“I will in a sec,” Hoseok said, checking his phone to see if Jungkook has texted him yet.

“How was the gym?” Yuna asked him, making him release a sigh.

“It was good, Jungkook was just… I don’t know, he’s worried,” Hoseok said looking over at her, “About Y/n.”

She didn’t say anything for a moment, choosing instead to stare blankly ahead at the screen. He cleared his throat, already able to tell something was going on, “You know anything? Why Y/n’s been acting differently? He said you were with her when he found her crying.”

“Babe, it’s not my place—“ “Come on, I’m not going to tell him if it’s bad, I just… is Y/n breaking up with him?” Hoseok asked, “I just want to know. You know Jungkook and Y/n are inseparable and if she dumps him I genuinely don’t know how he’ll take it.”

Yuna bit her lip nervously, “She’s not dumping him… but, um,” she knew she should tell him but he’s her boyfriend. He knows she knows what’s going on and if she doesn’t say something she’ll risk having an argument over secrets.

“You know how Y/n’s been working hard to get a permanent position in the magazine?” Yuna went on to say. Hoseok nodded as he tried to smile but he couldn’t, “She didn’t get it? I mean, it’s okay, I know it’s probably hard but it’s not something she should keep fro—“

“Y/n got the job,” Yuna said seriously watching Hobi’s face brighten before she could go on, “Just not here.”

“What do you mean?”

“It’s a permanent relocation with a high salary,” Yuna told him, “It’s not here and she’s got about two months to accept or reject the offer.”

“Oh,” Hoseok said. He didn’t know how to feel at the moment. Y/n was a good friend of his because of Jungkook. He was there to celebrate your internship and they all had been anticipating you getting this position. It was all the two ever talked about. On one hand he’s happy, you’ve worked hard for your job and this is something you went to school for. You deserve it.

On the other hand, he’s thinking about Jungkook. The kid has been one of his closest friends for years now. He’s seen him change through time and it was for the better when you came along. Everyone knows the relationship hasn’t been too long but, the way Hoseok sees it… Y/n is just right for him. They ground each other, they’re stable and they hold a lot of love for one and other. Jungkook quit getting wasted every night, passed out at some party never remembering where he was. He cleaned up his act when you came along and graduated with a Business degree and now he’s on his way to become an owner of his own training gym. Everyone knows you’re the one who was supporting him along the way and in Hoseok’s eyes it doesn’t matter how long two people have been together to know if they’re the one for each other.

That’s why he’s at a loss for words right now. Jungkook has asked him to see if Yuna knows what was going on and now that he knows he’s not sure what to tell his friend. It’s not like he could just say, ‘Oh yeah, the thing is, Y/n did get the job but she’ll have to relocate permanently if she accepts it but you just got your studio so that’s probably why she hasn’t said anything to you—and really no one knows what this means for you two and your relationship.’

“What do I tell him when he asks me about what you know?” Hoseok asked his girlfriend who only shrugged.

“I don’t know, just… don’t bring up Y/n’s job,” Yuna told him, “It’s better if nobody does.”

♱

That’s how the game began. Well, it wasn’t necessarily a fun game, it was more so a ‘How to keep Jungkook from knowing what was wrong until Y/n can tell him on her own?’

Hoseok had to let the others know. It wasn’t his intention to spread it around like gossip but after hearing Taehyung ask Jungkook if Y/n was still waiting to hear back about the position and making him go on a rant about how his girlfriend is too stressed to even speak to him, Hoseok had to say something to them.

Of course it made Yuna feel guilty because you trusted her to keep it between you two and she couldn’t—but you didn’t know any of this.

“Babe?” You called out to him as you got home late one evening. You looked around an empty house wondering if he was even home but his keys and shoes were at the entrance so he had to be.

“In the bathroom!” He shouted back and you left in the direction of your bedroom immediately. The door to the master was open and you went in to watch him begin to run a bath. He looked over at you, “Just got off?”

“Yeah,” you said with a small sigh as you leaned against the sink counter, “Mind if I join you?”

He smiled as he came over to where you were and placed his hands on your waist, fingers already gripping at the hem of your shirt, “Wouldn’t mind that at all.”

“Should we call Bam and make it a spa day?” Jungkook asked as he let you undress and went into the warm bubble bath. You shook your head, “He’ll make a mess.”

Jungkook didn’t argue with that as you came in after him and he immediately pulled you into his chest so your back was against him. His fingers tickled at your sides making you turn to mush in his arms till you relaxed against him. You rolled your eyes at his attack on you but you were smiling. Jungkook was happy to just get that from you. You let him pour water along your back and front before dropping some in your hair. You turned just enough to do the same to him and he let you run water through his hair. He’s not sure if you’re feeling better or not but he always enjoys time he gets to spend with you.

“So I need your help this weekend, I thought about it and I think I’m actually gonna paint the walls at the studio,” Jungkook began a casual conversation with you as you began to wash his hair with shampoo as he lathered your body in body wash. You nodded, “Okay, what color?”

“I want to do them white but with a black accent wall, probably chalk paint or something? I don’t know, then you can help me with calligraphy and it could be like my schedule wall, just an idea though,” Jungkook said, “I think I’m just getting excited.”

Your heart stopped for a short moment. You were hoping tonight would be the night you finally talk to him about work. You want to take the position but at the same time you want to turn it down. It’s such a good opportunity for you in the long run but right now you’re dating Jungkook. You don’t know how long your relationship will last since you’re still in your twenties and haven’t dated long, but he makes you want to stay. You just feel conflicted.

You tried to smile, “I like it, it’s going to look so good.”

Jungkook let the subject go as he washed your back, “I love you.”

“Ditto,” you laughed when he planted a kiss to your shoulder blade.

“I love you,” he placed a kiss on your neck, hands caressing your soapy arms.

You smiled, “I love you.” His hand traveled from your arm to your shoulder before making it to your chin and turning your head to face him. You leaned forward, pressing your lips against his and he released a low hum.

The kiss deepened further as did your back against his chest. The hand Jungkook used to turn your face toward him was traveling down your neck making you wiggle a little between his legs. With that small action and the fact that the kiss turned more hungry, he was releasing a quiet growl that rumbled through his chest. Your mouths parted at the same time but neither one of you moved back before going back in for a needy tongue kiss.

Jungkook didn’t need much convincing to let his hands roam your body, first cupping your breasts. A hand of yours had made it to the back of his neck clinging to him as he kissed down your neck, sucking harshly and licking away the pain.

“Baby,” you whined softly into his ear as his middle fingers and thumbs pinched the buds of your nipples so that he could run his index finger over them. You couldn’t stay still and by the hardening length along your back you knew your movements were affecting your boyfriend. He massaged your tits in his hands, squeezing them together and pulling them apart doing it over and over again as you fell full lax against his shoulder.

“You think I can still feel your dripping pussy in the water, baby?” Jungkook asked, tracing the finger that left your nipple numb with arousal down your navel and closer to your pelvis. You nodded against him and with a knowing smirk, he let his hand feel the water further as he slipped the hand between your legs and right over your cunt.

Jungkook groaned into your mouth as he swallowed your moans in a kiss. Of course everything felt different underwater but there was no denying the sticky slick pooling between your folds. He dipped his long middle finger between the wetness, immediately eliciting a quiet whine from your pretty lips. You tightened your hold on the back of his head, fingers sinking into his hair pulling him down deeper for the kiss.

He knew everything about your body and just how to make it react, like when he let the palm of his hand roll into your clit when his finger came out before plunging it back into your entrance and releasing pressure from his palm. The only sounds that filled the room were of the splashing water and your moans while Jungkook fingered you. Your other hand clung to his forearm, thighs threatening to shut at the immense pleasure he was giving you.

“Nuh uh,” he tsked in your ear as he sped up his finger, teasing the folds with his ring finger before making room inside your cunt for two fingers that hooked forward and back, “Don’t you dare close your legs.”

“Jungkook, please,” your legs were shaking as you bucked up into his hands and pressed into his hard cock forcing moan after moan from him as well. You could feel the rumble in his chest against your back and you just wanted to melt into him.

You and Jungkook had a very active sex life and it’s clear that these last couple of weeks you’ve both grown distant through time but it feels so good right now.

He traced his finger tips down your sides trying to turn to face him better. You moved onto your knees letting Jungkook help you hook them over his lap so you could be pressed against him better. Your hand was on his firm and wet chest as you traced it toward his neck before bringing him in for a kiss. His fingers were soft down your back until need became of him. They tightened in the locks of your hair using his hand to feel along your front.

“Is this why you wanted to bathe together tonight?” He asked as he continued to press against that soft spot inside your wet cunt that made your legs shake. It wasn’t exactly what you had in mind but you couldn’t even remember what you actually wanted to say now that he was bringing you to release with only two fingers.

“Fuck,” you moaned out letting your hips rut against his cock, “Me, oh god I need to feel you baby.”

Jungkook used his free hand to grope at your breasts but it quickly slid down to your navel pushing you back and forth grinding against his hard length. He was releasing short grunts into your ear, “Up.”

Your feet pressed flatly against the floor as he slipped his fingers out of your wet pussy to guide your hips up for you. You held onto the edge of the tub to hold yourself up as Jungkook moved a hand down to his dick giving it a couple strokes as he pointed it up. He slid down just a little more for better room and just like that you were sinking down onto his hard length raw.

“Oh,” Jungkook released a low groan, “Baby.”

He licked his dry lips watching the way you took him inside. The water was still filled with water and bubbles but he was able to see enough of your cute butt. Jungkook’s abs tensed so much that it was visible and flexed which made him look even hotter than usual. He begins to raise your hips feeling the warmth your pussy brought to his stiff cock.

Jungkook began to meet your thrusts with a buck of his hips and just like that did he begin to fuck you.

He leaned forward to leave wet and sloppy kisses along the back of your shoulder blade down to the way it flared along your back, moving his hands to grip your waist harshly. Jungkook's nail dug into your soft flesh as he lifted your hips up and down on his cock, “Take me so well, baby.”

He bit into his lip, watching in awe at the way your hips gained more determined rhythm to get him off, he could see glimpses of your spine following your movements. Your hands nearly slipped off of the edge of the bed coming very close to falling face first into the water but it didn’t stop you from saying, "I'm gonna cum."

He released a short grunt as he pushed himself up so that he could stand on a leg and knee, "Grab the edge." You did as told, reaching for one side and holding onto it pressing your chest into the side of the tub and Jungkook placed a flat palm against your lower back. You’ll both be sore from being crammed in the tub but it’s not like this is the first time. He bit into his bottom lip to suppress a loud moan from slipping out as felt your familiar ring of nerves clenching around his member as it sucked him into your folds. He wasn't going to last much longer either so he’s gotten rougher.

He was pounding into you from behind so good that he needed to drop his weight on your. His wet body pressed against you, cold water droplets falling onto your back making you twitch in surprise.

His hand snuck under your stomach to hold you close as you felt his face press into your back as he moaned, “Fuck, baby, so fucking good.

“You make me feel so good,” he repeated, “Cum, fuck, please cum baby, I—I—ngh.”

He made his body flex from how hard he was tensing up to keep himself from spilling inside of you as you came around his cock.

“Jungkook, baby,” you whined, body trembling as Jungkook kept you pressed against him as you rode your high.

When you came down you began to shiver. The water was cold and so were you, plus you were ultra sensitive so it was unbearable. Jungkook could feel the way you trembled and he was trying to keep himself warm, at least his cock warm, but he began to pull out. He rather get you two dressed and not freezing before he finishes himself off.

He could ignore his hard on even as it twitched against his navel as he stood making sure to pull him with you. You slipped on your thin bathrobe letting him do the same and with a chaste kiss on the lips he walked with you out to your bedroom.

“Jungkook,” you called out to him just as he tried leaving to his closet. He turned to you waiting patiently for you to say something but you just walked toward him in your little robe that hid absolutely nothing from his lustful gaze.

You stood so close to him now and before he could what was up your hand was pulling at the tie around his waist. He let you open his robe exposing the hard cock that had just fucked you to orgasm. He didn’t even bother looking down at it, keeping his eyes on you as you have him a couple experimental strokes, his mouth drawn open in a silent, desperate moan that had him panting.

“Don’t you want me to make you cum?" You asked as you kissed down his chest toward his dick. Jungkook looked blissed out with his eyes rolled up, lips parted and his entire face just looking relaxed, “Fuck, yes baby, make me cum, fuck, I need it.”

You bring your face closer to his tip, licking it teasingly, tasting the bead of precum on your tongue. In one swift movement, you flatten your tongue on the underside of his cock, a teasing longs swipe from his balls to his tip. You stopped at the head letting spit pool in your mouth and onto his cock keeping your eyes on his as he watched you swallow more of his length into your mouth.

Jungkook gripped the corner of your vanity table for support as you sucked his stiff cock to your heart’s content. You held the base of his cock with one hand, bobbing your head in a quick pace since he was already so close from fucking you just moments ago. Jungkook watches the way his cock disappears into your mouth, the feeling of your mouth, your hands working other areas. He could feel the way you tried to breathe through your nose and relax your throat, slowly taking more and more of him into your mouth. You took steady breaths through your nose doing your best to relax your throat and flatten your tongue. Jungkook panted lightly, feeling the throb of his cock as his tip hit the back of your throat.

You roughly swallow around him, suppressing a gag as you resume to deep throat him.

"That’s it baby," he groaned, tossing his head back in bliss. Moans were pouring out of his mouth, his groan is muffled into his hand, "Just like that."

Just like that, he released a low growl as your mouth flooded with his thick release. His mouth hung open, hips almost locking from how hard his muscles flexed. Your kisses became tender as you jerked off his wet cock, making sure he got it all out after a week or two of no sex. You placed a sweet kiss on his hip bone as it protruded before you, making him release a breath laugh at your form of comforting him.

He let his hand fall into your hair softly cupping your chin to help you up as he stared at you with loving eyes, “You’re so good to me.”

You didn’t say anything as you pressed your face into his chest for a hug so he wouldn’t see the hurt in your eyes.

If you could just get the courage to tell him.

♱

Jungkook was happy, he really was. Life was just good at the moment. His business is really starting to come together, his girlfriend is supportive, his friends are wonderful. He’s just a happy guy.

“The Prince has arrived!” Jimin shouted in his usual eccentric manner as he stormed into Taehyung’s place with a huge grin on his face. Jungkook was caught stuffing his face with ramen as the guy walked in greeting everyone.

“How was the flight?” Jungkook asked as he finished chewing and swallowed. Jimin had been gone for a couple weeks on some dance tour but he just got back yesterday. Everyone met up together today to see him. Jimin came by and did the usual male handshake, “Long, I slept like fourteen hours when I got home.”

“Grab a bowl, we’re having ramen,” Taehyung said as he plopped down on his couch, “Beer in the fridge.”

“Wow, a meal for a king,” Jimin said as he left to the kitchen.

“Didn’t he say he was a Prince?” Namjoon asked Jin who just shrugged in response.

y/n: just got home

jungkook: do you want me to pick u up? jimins here

y/n: that’s ok, I’m just gonna hang with bam

jungkook: ok :( love you

y/n: love you too <3

“So,” Jimin came back a little later and took a seat next to Jungkook, “When can I stop by the studio?”

“Give it a couple days and then you can,” Jungkook said as he set his bowl down on the coffee table, “Y/n and I just painted the walls this past weekend and it smells like paint—gives me a headache every time I go in.”

Jimin smiled, “It’s cool that you and Y/n are still going to pursue your own things.”

Both Jungkook and Jimin missed the way the others shared a similar glance. Jungkook’s brows furrowed for a second before answering, “Yeah, I mean, what else would we do? We’ve got to find a way to support each other, yknow?”

“You’re right,” Hoseok cut in quickly, “You support each other well for everything.”

Jimin was missing the cues being sent to him by the others. In his defense, he’s been gone for a while. All Jin told him was that you got that job offer but to not bring it up to Jungkook, but that was days ago! And would Jungkook be talking about his studio if he was planning on moving with you? No. So, he honestly thought the guy knew and you two were working it out.

“Yeah, I don’t think I could handle taking the news well,” Jimin went on, once again not understanding why everyone was looking at him with glares in their eyes, “I mean, if my girlfriend was thinking about moving across the world for a job, I wouldn’t take it well. I think I’d probably—“

“Y/n’s not moving,” Jungkook said with a small laugh, still missing the truth, “She hasn’t heard back about the offer yet but it’s here.”

The room fell silent.

Jungkook looked at them all, confusion crossing his features. Now he could sense it, he could sense something was going on around him and he had no idea about it. Why would Jimin assume you would need to relocate? Everyone looked at him with this sort of look in their eyes that began to make him wary. He released a small, cautious laugh, “Why would you think she’s moving?”

Jimin dropped his head realizing his mistake and now understanding why everyone was sending him those looks. Hoseok cleared his throat, “Jimin was just talking, you know how he is…”

“Yeah, yeah, I um, I don’t know why I said that, just ignore me.”

“No,” Jungkook shook his head, feeling something build up in his chest. It was a mix of concern and maybe anger? What were they talking about, “I want to know what you meant.”

He released a nervous laugh, “Y/n’s not—she hasn’t told me—she got the offer?”

“Jungkook…” Namjoon cut in, “It’s not up to us to say anyt—hey!”

Jungkook wasn’t listening anymore. He was looking for his keys so he could go home. What are they talking about?

You were in your bedroom with Bam. He was laying perfectly still on your lap as you played some movie in the background while brushing his teeth. You haven’t had dinner yet since you were waiting for Jungkook and you’re sure that even though he had ramen, he would still be hungry.

Todays the day you’ll tell him since last time ended in sex. You’ll get him nice and relaxed before bringing up the job and then you two can talk it out and see what to do. You’re still not sure if you’re taking it or not but you’re sure that after talking with Jungkook he’ll help you come to a decision that’s best for you.

“Y/n!”

A smile came to your face as Bam immediately jumped up ready to greet his owner, “Over here!” You said back as you began to move off the bed, “I’ve been waiting for you.”

Before you could get to the door it was swung open and you immediately knew something was wrong. Jungkook looked angry, there was no denying his stone cold expression. “What’s wrong?”

“What’s wrong? What’s wrong!?” He scoffed loudly as Bam stood at alert between you two, “Why don’t you tell me what’s wrong, Y/n. Or are you going to wait for my friends to do it for you?”

Your heart dropped. What?

Jungkook couldn’t hold it in, he hit the wall lightly, “Say something! Did you get the job?”

“I… yes,” you said quietly and he took a deep breath. He wanted to feel happy, he was happy but… were the guys right? Were you leaving? Why haven’t you told him anything?

“How long have you known?” Jungkook asked, trying to remain calm. You closed your eyes scared, “A month, I didn't tell you be—“

“A month? A fucking month, Y/n?” His breathing was becoming erratic as he tried to push that strange lump in his throat down, “Why—what—oh my god. You told everyone else but me.”

“I didn’t! I swear, I didn’t tell anyone—only Yuna—“ you said as realization hit you. What did he mean by everyone? Who told him? Who knew?

“And you couldn’t talk to your boyfriend?” Jungkook asked, “Y/n, baby, I—we’re supposed to be a team. We’re supposed to tell each other everything. We, fuck, you don’t trust me?”

“Jungkook please,” you begged as you tried to reach for him but he moved back, “I didn’t tell you because I didn’t want to worry you. I did get the job but I would have to relocate and I didn’t know how to tell you. I wanted to talk to you and see what we can do or what I should do and… and—“

“But you didn’t talk to me, Y/n!” Jungkook yelled, “You’re saying this but it doesn’t change the fact that you couldn’t talk to me.”

“I wanted to tell you on my own time,” you said. You couldn’t even bring it in yourself to get loud or more vocal. Jungkook scoffed, “When was that gonna be? Were you just gonna shoot me a text while you’re flying across the world?”

“That’s not fair! I haven’t even accepted it yet, I wouldn’t just leave you like that,” you told him as you tried getting close again. He couldn’t even look at you right now.

He’s so proud of you for getting the offer and he wants you to do what’s best for you. He doesn’t know if he’s temporary in your life or not but it doesn’t help that he wants to be selfish and tell you that you can’t leave him. He doesn’t want you to go but it’s not like he could control it. The guilt would eat at him if he ever tried making this choice for you.

Jungkook just doesn’t get why you couldn’t even tell him. You distanced yourself from him and this entire time he thought he was the one who might have done something to upset you.

He released a small scoff as he leaned against the wall looking defeated, he let you hug his waist but he couldn’t even look at you right now. He was in extreme duress at what this means for the two of you. He can’t just pack up his life and follow after a girl who can’t even be open with him.

“Do you love me?” He asked so suddenly that you couldn’t process it quickly enough. He mistook your moment of silence as hesitation and released a deep sigh as he tried pushing you away gently.

“Yes,” you told him honestly as you gave him space.

He laughed bitterly, “You can’t even say it.”

“Jungkook, I love you.”

“You know, I’m getting real tired of having to practically beg you to tell me you love me,” Jungkook’s voice was hoarse. He felt awful because he knows you love him but the way you close off from him and keep him in the dark makes him think it’s not reciprocated to the extent of his own feelings.

“Baby, please just sit with me and talk and we can figure this out,” you said trying to guide him toward the bed but he wouldn’t budge.

He shook his head, “I don’t want to talk it out. You couldn’t tell me when it happened Y/n, you distanced yourself from me and I genuinely thought I did something wrong. I thought that maybe I was the one who did something to upset you and I’ve been worried sick thinking that you weren’t in love with me anymore. So if you want to talk about unfair, there it is.”

“My girlfriend doesn’t want me enough to confide in me and can’t even say she loves me unless asked,” Jungkook felt his eyes begin to burn but he ignored the feeling.

“No, please, that’s not it, I just didn’t want to worry you if I didn’t even know if I was taking it or not,” you kept repeating, “I want to talk. I haven’t talked to anyone about it. I don’t know how everyone found out but please…”

“Y/n, I need space.”

You froze, “What?”

He couldn’t meet your eyes, “I just… I really love you and I’m mad you couldn’t talk to me about it but at the same time I feel like it isn’t my decision to make. I don’t want you to stay because of me, if you want to take the offer…”

He was struggling to speak as he began to walk away, “I can’t do this.”

“Jungkook I want to be with you, that’s not going to change so whether you believe it or not, you have a huge impact on my decision an—“

“Y/n, please,” Jungkook ran his hand over his face, “I want you to stay. I want you to stay so fucking bad but I also want you to do what you think is best for you. I can’t ask you to turn something down for me even if everything inside me wants to. I just… I don’t think I could go with you.”

“So I just need some time,” he said as he grabbed a duffel bag from his closet, “And I mean, let’s face it. We haven’t been together long enough for you to want to stay for me.”

“So you’re breaking up with me when I haven’t even decide—“

“No, I’m not. I would never. I’m just going to give you space,” he cut you off, “I’m going to give you time to decide what you want to do.”

“Okay but it still sounds like you’re just dumping me,” you told him as he packed a bag, “Feels like you’re giving me an ultimatum, you or the job.”

He took a deep breath, “I’m not dumping you, I just—can you just understand where I’m coming from? We’re supposed to be a team and yet sometimes I feel like it’s too much work for you to be open with me. You aren’t as vocal about our relationship and I am totally fine with that but sometimes you can’t even show me that you feel the same. You turn away from me, you lie, you can’t confide in me, and honestly if you really wanted to talk about that offer with me you would’ve done it in the beginning instead of push me away. That makes me feel like shit because I’ve been trying and trying with you and it’s like… you just don’t care.”

“I want us to work out, I really do because I love you, and I know sometimes you struggle saying it but you love me too and that’s why I just don’t get why you couldn’t just come to me first,” he kept going, “I had to hear it from everyone else and do you know how embarrassing it is that everyone’s been knowing more about my girlfriend then I have? I get that it wasn’t your intention but it’s what happened and it does make me feel shitty.”

He looked over at you and he could see the tears forming in your eyes and this time he understood why. He had finished packing his bag and went to you right away. He felt like crying too but he couldn’t tell you why. Like he said, he wants you to make the decision that’s best for you. If you want to try long distance… he’s not sure if he’ll be able to handle it but he’s willing to try for you. If you want to break up, he’ll be heartbroken but he understands the circumstances. You haven’t even been dating for a year, he can’t expect you to throw away your dream career for him even if it hurts to think about it.

He held your face in his hands, squeezing his eyes shut to fight back a couple tears and pressed a kiss to your boyfriend, “I love you.” He wasn’t expecting you to say it back, he was expecting the same old ditto.

“I love you too,” you whispered and he felt his chest practically squeeze his heart painfully. He left his lips there on your forehead, no longer giving a kiss but just basking in your presence for a little longer.

“Where are you gonna go?” You asked as he finally pulled away. He shrugged, “I’ll stay with one of the guys for a while, I’ll be back, I promise.”

You watched him rally up Bam and even though you didn’t want either to go you understood. If you could’ve just talked to your very understanding boyfriend about this then you could’ve saved both of you from this weird feeling. This is what he was talking about though, you’re not breaking up and yet thinking of him not waking up beside you hurts.

Bam ran over to you as Jungkook stood at the door and you leaned down to hug him too as he licked your face like he knew he wouldn’t see you for a while.

When he left it suddenly felt a lot lonelier than before and the second the door shut behind him he let himself cry. That made him feel ridiculous because this is not him breaking up with you but if you could’ve just talked to him, if you could’ve just been open with him things wouldn’t have happened this way. Some people might think he’s being dramatic but he’s changed and grown so much in the past two years and it would be a lie if he said you didn’t help him on the way, so to stop you from doing it too is like a punch in the gut.

♱

He ended up at Namjoon’s place where he’s been staying the last couple of days. He’s just the most understanding even if he doesn’t fully agree with how either of you have handled things.

“I don’t think you’re being dramatic Kook, but I can’t tell you that I fully understand everything,” Namjoon said on Jungkook’s fifth day of being there, “If Y/n takes the job offer and leaves I know you’ll be happy that she’s going after something she’s wanted for a while but also sad that she’ll be gone. Do you really think you couldn’t try long distance?”

“That’s the thing, I don’t know,” Jungkook said as he ran his hand over his face clearly stressed, “I want to try if that’s what Y/n wants but… I want to be able to see her, hold her, know that I’m going home to her and if she’s away, I can’t. I would love nothing more than to go with her but I can’t just uproot my life for someone I’m not married—even engaged to. A big move like that could damage our relationship and I just don’t want to risk it.”

“If she asked you to go, would you think about it at least?” Namjoon asked. Jungkook thought about it for a moment, “If she asked me to… and I knew she wanted me there, I would—but I know Y/n would never ask me, especially not now that I’m doing the studio.”

“So you already have it in your mind that Y/n’s leaving?” Namjoon asked. He could tell that his friend was struggling right now. He had bags under his eyes from lack of sleep, he’s not eating that well but he’s stubborn. He was upset, very, and that’s why he needed some space but at the same time he just missed you so much. It’s like he wanted to prepare himself to not be with you every day if you did decide to move. He was seeing if he could actually handle it.

“I’m just preparing myself for the worst.”

“I’m so sorry Y/n, like you have no idea how awful I feel,” Yuna said once while you three were getting coffee. You needed a couple mental days to think things through and she’s tried talking to you a few times but you just weren’t in the mood to talk. A week has passed and you finally decided to respond and go out for coffee with them.

You released a tired sigh as you leaned back on the small arm chair you sat in, “It’s whatever.”

“Y/n, this is my fault,” Hoseok said, “I just—I just wanted to make sure nobody talked about work before you could tell him yourself. I thought we were helping but obviously not so if you need to blame anyone, blame me.”

“I don’t blame you guys,” you said to them, “You’ve known Jungkook for a long time, I’m just… it was just a lot and I should’ve just told him right away.”

“I get why you didn’t though,” Yuna told you, “You didn’t want to worry him if you didn’t even know what you wanted to do.”

“But um, this is just me asking you as your friend,” Hoseok said, “Do you know yet? It’s almost been two months, don’t you have to make a decision soon?”

“Not yet,” you told him. You looked tired and mentally drained about this and that’s not what you want at all. “It’s my dream job but… it’s far and I would essentially be alone starting over so there’s just a lot to think about. And Jungkook thinks what he says shouldn’t affect my decision but it does.”

Hoseok and Yuna nodded understandingly knowing that if they were in the same situation it would also be a difficult decision to make. It was quiet between all of you as you thought about the job offer again but you finally gathered the courage to ask, “How is he?”

“Um,” Hoseok cleared his throat trying to think of a way to ask without making you too worried, “He’s, y’know, he’s just wanted time alone. He’s not mad at you, I think he just thinks you’ve made up your mind and he thinks he’ll hold you back.”

You groaned, “But he wouldn’t. He’s one of the most genuine and supportive guys I’ve ever met and it pisses me off that I just haven’t really appreciated him as much as I should have.”

“Y/n stop,” Yuna said, “He knows you love him and he knows you’ve been thinking about this a lot and that’s why he’s trying to make it easier on you even if y’know, that’s questionable.”

♱

Jungkook’s a mature guy, he swears it, everyone knows this but it’s been a long time since he last drank without knowing he was going home to you. He doesn’t know how to handle it. It’s been two weeks and he only knows about you from what Hoseok has told him—which isn’t much since he’s vowed to keep his mouth shut about what either of you say. You miss him, he misses you but he wants you to make your decision without him around. He doesn’t want to influence you on a life changing decision. He loves you too much to hold you back. He’s just also growing a little delirious now.

“This is such a fun night!” He yelled so loudly heads turned in his direction but he didn’t care. His friends tried getting him to walk straight but he’s a little too drunk for that right now. His arms were up like he just made the winning goal as he repeated himself, “I’m gonna get so fucking drunk tonight.”

He spun in a circle acting like he was on top of the world at the moment. Namjoon grabbed him by the back of his shirt, “Come on man, you’re already drunk, I think we should call it a night.”

“Let him have fun,” Jimin said laughing as Jungkook continued to walk in circles spinning himself so much that he was dizzy and with that feeling of puking. “He’s been a zombie for weeks now and this is the first time I’ve seen him relax. Let him get it out of his system.”

This was 100% Jimin’s idea and listen, he’s a good friend, he really is. He’s just the more carefree type. He feels bad for telling Jungkook but in his mind it’s not that serious and right now he’s just happy that his friend’s not passed out on Namjoon’s couch, sad.

Namjoon huffed as he tried to reel Jungkook back in, “Yeah and look how well he’s doing that.”

“I feel great, hyung! I feel like a weight has been lifted off my shoulders! I feel like I can fly!” Jungkook said, spreading his arms out accidentally whacking some bystander.

“Hey!”

“Sorry!” Jimin said pulling Jungkook back before he started a fight with someone. He’s drunk enough to do that and he knows that Jungkook will be very willing to start a fight just so he could hit something. That’s the kind of guy he was before you and right now he’s got a lot of emotions running through him at the moment.

“I’m not!” Jungkook yelled in response to Jimin’s apology to the stranger and he watched him with a smirk. He was definitely looking for a fight right now, just like his old self would.

“Alright let’s get him home,” Namjoon said with a sigh as he attempted to help Jimin keep Jungkook walking before he really pissed someone off. Jungkook could handle his own but he’s a clumsy drunk so probably not right now.

Jungkook tried freeing himself from their grip, “No! I don’t want to go to your place. I want to go home.”

“Alright, so what are we still doing here?” Namjoon asked more annoyed now, “You’re just being stubborn at this point and if you really wanted to be with Y/n, you would be! So quit acting like this and go talk it out! You’ve been mad she won’t talk to you about things and now you’re doing the same. Look at how you’re acting. If Y/n was here she’d kill you for acting like a fool and I know you’re not actually having fun. You’re just acting like you are so that you don’t think about what’s going on and it’s not working!”

At that reminder Jungkook seemed to freeze up, as if he hadn’t been yelling at the top of his lungs about how fun the night was. Jimin looked serious now, realizing that this wasn’t all that okay, and he needed to get Jungkook back to Joon’s place to sleep it off. Namjoon was being a little cruel but it’s what Jungkook needed to hear right now and it's up to Jimin to be the sympathetic one.

Jimin pulled Jungkook into his side, “Let’s just get you back to Joon’s place and get you sober before you do an—Jungkook!”

He was nearly sprinting into a cab, swinging the door open and locking it before his friends could get to him. He told the driver an address and he was off. Don’t ask him where he was going because it was obvious. He’s going to you.

It wasn’t until he stood in front of his door that he realized his mistake.

“Aish,” he cursed himself as he stared around the concrete hall of his apartment. On one side was the cement railing facing the building courtyard and on the other was his old place. He grabbed his keys, it’s too late now, right? You’ll probably be sleeping and too tired to have this conversation again but he needed to see you. He muttered incoherently to himself as he let himself in making too much noise in his drunken haze.

Jungkook followed his usual routine. He knew exactly where to leave his keys and his shoes. He knew where to hang his coat and where the extra blankets and pillows were. He knew which remote was for what and where the outlets were.

You had been sleeping—or at least attempting to—but it was strange to sleep in an empty bed. It was a little hard to sleep when you were positive there was an intruder. You couldn’t even ask your big buff boyfriend to go check it out because he’s been gone! You should probably stay in bed and pretend you’re not home but you’re also scared to do nothing.

So you gathered all the courage you could and also your phone so you could be ready to call the police—oh and one of the dumbbells Jungkook left here before he split, just to be safe.

Now imagine if you actually used it on the intruder who was currently fussing with one of your blankets trying to get himself comfortable on the small couch. You released a sigh holding a hand to your racing heart, “Jungkook!”

He looked over at you, wide awake, “You’re awake?I—I didn’t want to wake you, I just wanted to be here when you woke up and—”

“Why are you here?” You asked as you went up to him. He resisted the urge to open his arms for you to crawl into. He was slurring on his words as he spoke to you and you can tell something was up.

“Are you drunk?” You continued to ask him questions and he was just trying not to seem that way because then you’ll ask him why he’s drunk. Jungkook was trying his best to seem comfortable. His arm was behind his head and his other hand on his chest, a leg kicked up on the couch, tangled in the blanket but it didn’t feel right. After some time he gave you a brief nod to your question and looked at you, “I want to come home.”

You turned away from him and for a second he thought you were just going to end it with him right now over the fact that he need a break.

“You’re so mean,” your voice was shaky and he sat up immediately worrying you would cry, “Y—you just left because you needed space and now you’re coming back in the middle of the night and… ugh I missed you so much.”

“I’m sorry,” Jungkook said, “I thought you made up your mind. I thought you were just trying to hold off telling me and I was scared but Y/n… I’m telling you right now that if you want to leave I’ll go with you. I’ll follow you wherever and I just needed time to realize that my home is with you no matter where we g—“

His breath was nearly knocked out of his chest as you fell into his arms. He’s never held onto anyone so tightly in his life. He held you like his life depended on it and you cling to him like a little koala sitting on his lap.

“I’m not taking it.”

He couldn’t hear you at first, he hadn’t processed it but when he did he froze, “What? Baby, I, if, what are you saying right now?”

You pulled away from his chest to look at him, sniffling a little, “I’m not taking it. I’ve been stalling making this decision because I thought I didn’t want to let anyone down but I realized it’s because I don’t want to do it. If it was here I would take it but I don’t want to leave. I don’t want to make you pack up your life and go with me. I don’t want to leave our amazing friends. I don’t want to leave everything behind and Bam wouldn’t be able to see Tannie.”

He laughed softly as he brushed your hair out of your face wiping your tears in the process, “Always thinking about Bam… but I want you to be sure about your decision honey, I want to know this is what you want because like I said, I’ll follow you wherever. I just don’t want to see you cry.”

“No, I don’t want to go anywhere. I want to be here with you and with everyone and I’m sorry I’ve made this so difficult. I just… I’m bad at making decisions and, fuck, I’m just sorry. I could find a job anywhere, I know they’ll hire me and I won’t have to leave everything behind for it.”

Jungkook felt mushy inside. Part of him still felt guilty that you were turning this down but he also knows that no matter how hard it is to decide on something, once you’ve done it, there’s no going back. Like with him, once you decide on each other that’s that. He’s not letting you and he sees that you won’t let him go either.

“And you’re positive this is what you want? You won’t regret it?

You shook your head, “I won’t,” sniffling, you added, “I love you.”

He smiled, “Ditto.”

You laughed softly as he pressed his lips against yours, “I’m so fucking in love you, Y/n and we’ve made this so much more difficult than it needed to be and I’m sorry for that.”

“Let’s just forget it,” you told him, “Let’s just go to bed and move on.”

He released a content sigh, suddenly holding you by the waist and standing with you clinging to him, “We’ll talk in the morning, just to make sure. For now I’m taking my crybaby to bed and tomorrow we’re bringing Bam home together because he missed his mommy so much.”

“Mommy?” You said even as tears filled your eyes, still being a crybaby, “I missed you both so much.”

“We missed you too.”

::.

wow okay this was a rollercoaster but like a good one idk

it came out softer than I wanted but whatever

also banner change cause Calvin Klein 🤭

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Right time | jjk

⤷ part of the timing series

⏤ pairing: jungkook x female reader 

⏤ genre: parent au, exes to lovers, ceo au, angst, fluff, and smut 

⏤ rating: 18+

⏤ warnings: dilf!jungkook, tattooed!jungkook, nervousness, swearing, mention of sex, sexual tension, teasing, mention of jk being a fuckboy, mention of breakup, mention of heartbreak, mention of death, mention of grief, crying, mention of sadness, dry humping, masturbation, mention of heartbreak, oral sex, penetrative sex, unprotected sex, rough sex, mention of going through a though time, broken hearts, mention of suffering, mention of unhappiness, and heartbreak

⏤ words: 10,724

⏤ summary: following your reunion with jungkook, getting back together seems to be the right thing to do however everything is different. jungkook is a father, running the company you’re working for, and there are still things to be solved. nonetheless, it can’t erase the tremendous physical attraction between you. is it now the right or wrong time?  

⏤ author’s note: this part is finally out! it's been quite some work but it's finally out and all yours! since it's finally posted, I can already let you know that there will be a third part called perfect time. the teaser will be posted tomorrow 😬 i hope you like this part, let me know what you think! thanks a lot for your support & for waiting patiently for this part 💛

To say that Jungkook was nervous was an understatement. He’s going out on a date with you. He’s literally screaming on the inside like a 5-year-old that finally got the candy they were asking for. He’s been waiting for this for years and also, he hasn’t been on a proper date in a while. But he’s very much excited. 

“Hi,” you say as you step outside of the apartment complex. 

A bright smile appears on both of your faces when you see each other. Honestly, having had sex a couple of days ago brought some happiness to your lives. You’ve been feeling more alive than ever, and nothing can erase that feeling. Well, at least, that’s what you thought. 

There are still things left to discuss but right now, you’re both on cloud 9 so you don’t feel the necessity to talk. You simply want to stay in your little cloud a little longer which means that you’ll do everything to stay there. 

“Hi, yn,” Jungkook offers you the bouquet he’s holding in his hands. 

“Thanks for the flowers,” you reply as you take the bouquet. 

Your eyes move from Jungkook to the flower arrangement, it’s a very pretty one. This kind of surprises you since Jungkook never bought you flowers when you dated before but you have to forget about the past. Things are different now as you both are very different people today. 

“Arya helped me choose them,” the smile on his face grows bigger while remembering being in the flower shop with her. 

At first, he was planning to go alone to buy you flowers but then, he was spending the day with his daughter so he brought her up to have her little opinion. Now, she’s staying at her mama’s place for the 3 upcoming days. Jungkook hasn’t mentioned anything about you to Eunji yet but for sure, Arya will mention the bouquet to her mother so he’s very much aware that he’ll have to at least explain something to Eunji. 

“Well, you both have good taste in flowers,” you quickly smell the beautiful bouquet. 

“She’s my daughter so she definitely has good tastes,” he instantaneously answers. 

A little laugh leaves your lips at his words. That’s easy to say when it’s your own daughter, you think but his words also warm your heart. It’s so sweet that he let his daughter assist him in choosing a bouquet of flowers for you. And it’s also extremely sweet how he speaks about her. 

“Your tastes can be very much questionable,” you tease him. 

With surprise, he raises an eyebrow. He definitely wasn’t expecting to hear you say those words but he’s undeniably liking being teased by the woman he loves deeply. 

“If mines are questionable, then yours are dubious,” he doesn’t hesitate to reply, “especially your taste in men,” he adds. 

“For sure, it is because I’m still wondering how on earth I could have fallen for you,” you end up laughing. 

But the truth is how you could have not fallen for him. It’s easy to love him, and it feels even easier to be loved by this man. There are for sure many things to say about your love for him but it’d take you probably days or weeks or even more to list all the reasons you fell hard for him. 

“That’s exactly what I was referring to,” he adds. “Not sure how you fell for me, especially back then.” 

Hearing him saying that inevitably breaks your heart, even if he’s joking. For sure, back then, he wasn’t the best person on earth, he was a fuckboy after all. He was very much known on the campus for being the guy who fucks every girl he meets, and for being a heartbreaker. But he was perfect for you. Beyond that image of fuckboy, he was the sweetest guy you had ever met.  

“Don’t say that,” you gently slap him on the arm. 

“I’m serious, I don’t know what you saw in me when we started dating,” his stare becomes quite sincere.  

Now, your heart is very much broken by his words. This man doesn’t even see how pretty and amazing he is. But beyond that, he’s without any doubt the most brilliant person you’ve ever met. Even back then, what charmed you was his mind and heart. It was never about his looks because if it was for that, you wouldn’t have approached him at all. He was a fuckboy, the kind of guy that you hated. 

“I saw your heart underneath all those walls,” you say before placing your hand on his chest, right above his heart. 

Jungkook places his hand on top of yours. He can’t even express what he’s feeling right now but he’s absolutely sure of one thing, he feels lucky to be with you here and now. His hand caresses yours, both of you with a little smile on your faces. This moment is undeniably heartwarming for the two of you. 

“But you were the only person that I let in,” he whispers. “You’re the only one that got to see who I truly was.” 

At his words, you inevitably squeeze him in your arms for a tight hug, your head pressed against his chest. It surprises him but he holds you back. While hugging you, it reminds him just how much he missed it. When you were together, you used to hug each other a lot. It brought a lot of peace to the two of you, it was a moment where everything would disappear for an instant. It was a moment of pure happiness. 

Just as it is right now.

None of you want this moment to end. This feels extremely good. You hold him even tighter in your arms, you don’t desire to let go of him. You close your eyes to enjoy this moment even more. This is something you also missed deeply. Well, to be honest, you deeply missed Jungkook. Maybe more than you’ll ever admit. 

“I love this,” you whisper very low. 

Jungkook hears it and can’t help but smile even more. He doesn’t say anything, he’s simply enjoying this moment with you. Hopefully, this won’t be a one-time thing. He’s hopeful that you’ll get to do this more often. Because a hug always heals a heart. 

“We should probably get going,” Jungkook says before pressing a gentle kiss on top of your head. 

With a heavy heart, you pull away from the man you love. You walk to his car and he opens the door for you. Feeling like a princess, you enter his priceless car. It’s undoubtedly a very expensive car but as a CEO, he can afford tons of luxurious stuff. Your eyes wander around, admiring this wonderful and expensive car. 

Jungkook jumps in the car seconds after you. His eyes take in the pretty girl sitting on the passenger seat. That’s a sight he never thought he’d get to see and it absolutely warms his softened heart. Hopefully, from now on, this will be a view he’ll see more often. His face turns to the windshield to start driving.  

For the two of you, being here right now brings you back to ten years ago. Your ex-boyfriend would drive you everywhere, it would always be good. Most of the time, you’d sing along to songs he’d chosen but he’d always take the ones you two liked. Some other times, you’d have intense conversations about random topics or yourselves. Tons of talks took place in his previous car, even hard conversations. 

Honestly, you’re feeling a bit nervous. It’s exciting to be with him at the moment however, you’re a bit fearful that an unpleasant topic of conversation will be brought up. Even if you’re on cloud 9, you’re still very much aware that there are a lot of things to be talked about. You broke his heart, that’s not something that can be erased with some conversations and sex. For sure, sex isn’t the answer to his broken heart. 

But right now, you don’t want to think about it, so you brush away any sour thoughts. You’re on a date with him and you should enjoy it as much as you possibly can. This will maybe help you to get to a better place. 

“How have your parents been doing?” he asks, his eyes quickly looking at you. 

Following the kind of ‘closure’ conversation you had at his place, he kept wondering how your parents were doing, especially after the death of one of their children. Even though it’s been 10 years since your sister passed away, it must still be very hard for them. He can only imagine how it feels. He’d stop living if Arya passed away, his life wouldn’t make any sense without her, and his heart would be beyond broken. 

“Now, they are kind of doing better,” you reply. “But losing a child is something that changed them completely, they aren’t the same and I strongly believe they’ll never fully grieve.” 

Your heart breaks as you recall all the times you found your parents crying over your sister. Things haven’t been easy since that tragic day but you’ve always been there for them. They also have been very much present for you. It was hard for all of you because you all lost someone very dear to you. But today, days are better. It’s easier to smile, to enjoy little things in life, and to simply live.      

“I lost a sister and it’s already very awful but losing a child…” you start saying while shaking a bit your head. “I don’t even want to imagine the tremendous void that it leaves in your heart.” 

You haven’t had a child yet so this is a kind of pain that you cannot understand. But she was your sister. It was still a very painful loss and for sure, something you were never prepared to face. However, with time, you started getting used to the constant ache inside your heart. It’s there, all the time, and some days, it destroys you. During those moments, missing her becomes too overwhelming. 

“I’m still very sorry for your loss,” he tells you. 

He quickly glances at you. As your eyes meet, you can tell that he’s extremely sincere. When he breaks contact, you stare at the wonderful night sky. Right now, you’re feeling extremely nostalgic. Being in a car with Jungkook brings you back to when your sister was still alive. After a little outing with your boyfriend, you’d come home and find her reading a book in her bed. That thought alone brings tears to your eyes. 

Before you can even realize it, tears are rolling down your face. Now all you can see is her face with a bright smile while she’s saying some nonsense that she used to say. She used to make you laugh with the silly things she’d say. She was a sunshine. A shining one. But it’s gone now and it will never come back.  

Jungkook immediately stops the car to the side. It breaks his heart to see you like this. Now he’s the one being brought back to ten years ago. Following the passing of your sister, he was the one holding at first. He was the one consoling you when your world fell apart. 

“Hey, yn,” he says before pulling you into his arms, your eyes instantly closing. 

For sure, it’s not comfortable at all but you manage to put your head on his strong arms. At that moment, you let yourself cry. Jungkook presses gentle kisses on top of your head, his left hand caressing your shoulder while his right hand caresses your back. He’s trying as much as he can to soothe you but he feels helpless. Seeing someone he deeply loves devastated always makes him feel powerless.  

Jungkook never meant to cause any pain by asking how your parents were doing but he should have thought better. 

“I’m so sorry,” he whispers in between kisses. 

You hold him tightly while you cry your heart out. This really comes as a surprise for you but it might be due to the fact that seeing your ex-boyfriend has brought back memories from the past. You definitely didn’t think that you’d start crying on your actual first date. You’ve been extremely happy following the very steamy session with your ex and this right now is the exact opposite. 

“Please forgive me for bringing this up,” he adds. 

This is definitely not his fault. It’s no one’s fault, except for the driver that killed your sister. He was completely drunk, was driving on the wrong side of the road, and around a bend, he drove full force into the car your sister was in. Your sister and her boyfriend died instantly. So, to conclude, it’s the driver’s fault. It’ll forever be his fault. 

Slowly, you start to calm down in Jungkook’s arms. They are extremely comforting, just as they were ten years ago. 

“It’s not your fault, Kook,” you say. 

His lips press another gentle kiss on top of your head. 

“We can cancel the date if you don’t feel like it,” he tells you. 

For sure, he wouldn’t feel comfortable going on a date with you when you’re feeling like this. Even if he was excited to spend this time with you, your safety and happiness come first. 

“No,” you reply, “I really want to go to the restaurant.” 

You clean your eyes in an attempt to look presentable but there are no doubts that the makeup you spent hours working on is completely ruined. Probably you ruined everything now. What was supposed to be a cheerful moment has turned into a crying session. 

“You’re sure?” he asks with concern.

“Yep,” you directly say. 

You take a deep breath before sitting correctly on your seat and parting from Jungkook’s strong arms. His eyes scan your face carefully, trying to understand how broken you are. To his surprise, he’s just watching sadness in your eyes. Ten years ago, the only thing he’d see in your eyes was emptiness. To tell the truth, he was expecting to see that in your eyes but there’s just sadness. In some way, it reassures him because emptiness makes him feel helpless. 

Sadness is something he can help you with. He has seen that a lot in Arya’s face and in yours as well. For that, he can do something, he will for sure find a way to cheer you up. He’ll do whatever it takes to remove the sadness he caused in your eyes. 

“You’re absolutely stunning, yn,” he mumbles. 

Your cheeks blush at his words, your eyes are still teary but a small smile still manages to make its way onto your face. 

“How can you find me stunning in this state?” you ask. 

Without any doubt, the mascara runs down your face, your eyes are puffy, your cheeks are red from your cries and also from his compliment, and your hair is a bit messy from your hug. However, you look absolutely wonderful in his eyes. This is the real you, and he wouldn’t want to see anything else than the real you. 

“You’re stunning under any circumstances, yn,” he answers. 

“Don’t say that,” you shyly say. 

“I’m just telling the truth,” 

A little smile appears on his face, he definitely loves to see you acting all shy around him. That’s a sign that he makes you feel something and he loves to see it in the girl that he always loved. 

“Stop saying nonsense and let’s go to the restaurant,” you reply. 

Undoubtedly, if he keeps staring at you like you’re some kind of goddess, you’ll kiss him and probably beg him to fuck you in this car. But that will be a way to forget this awful feeling and you can’t use Jungkook to make you stop thinking about your sister for a brief moment. He doesn’t deserve that, not after all that you made him go through for the past ten years. 

“As you wish, ma’am,” he answers. 

A little laugh escapes your lips while your ex starts the car again. All the way to the restaurant, Jungkook keeps making you laugh, slowly pushing away the sadness you felt earlier. During the entire time, you feel grateful this man even exists. Nobody has ever made you feel this way. 

Once you arrive at the restaurant, Jungkook places his hand on your lower back while walking to your table. A table reserved by him the day before. The restaurant is extremely fancy and is without any doubt very expensive. This is your first time in this type of restaurant. 

The dinner goes well, Jungkook tries to cheer you up all along, an attention that honestly warms your heart. He purposely tries to avoid mentioning the name of your sister, too scared to make you cry once more. He wouldn’t forgive himself if he ruined the date again. 

Spending this time with him was wonderful. He spoke a lot about his daughter Arya, he’s for sure extremely proud of her. From what you got to see and hear, he’s an excellent father to that little girl. They are both lucky to have each other. 

Once you’re done eating and discussing, you leave the restaurant. Jungkook doesn’t let you pay although you really insisted on paying at least a little something. However, he promised to let you pay next time. You know for sure that it will never happen, he’s never going to let you pay anything. 

Right now, you’re both walking to his car. As you're walking, your bodies are very close, his hand brushing against yours, and you’re just dying to hold it and intertwine your fingers with his. During the entire dinner, you were just craving his touch, wanting his warmth to embrace your body. 

“Thanks for the dinner, Kook,” you tell him. 

His face turns to glance at you. A gentle and sincere smile appears on his face but what really catches your attention is the way he’s looking at you. There’s so much affectation and tenderness. No man has ever looked at you the way he’s currently doing. Undoubtedly, he’s the one for you. He always has been.  

“Do you want to do something? Or do you want to go home?” he asks you. 

For a brief moment, you hesitate but you’d love to spend more time with him. You don’t want this moment with him to be over. You simply want this to last forever but it’s not possible. There’s a point in time when you’ll have to go home and sleep. In a couple of hours, this moment will turn into a memory that you’ll cherish deeply but you definitely don’t want it to be a souvenir just yet. 

“Maybe we could do something,” you answer. 

“Would you like to go to my place and have some cocktails?” he asks. “I’ve become quite an expert at preparing them.” 

That definitely surprises you. You can’t imagine him preparing a cocktail but there’s absolutely no doubt that you desire nothing more than to taste one of his cocktail creations. 

“Let’s do that,” you say with a bright smile on your face. 

The drive to his place goes by pretty smoothly. The two of you are in your own world, it’s like nothing ever happened between you. It’s just like you’re back to loving each other. The crushing reality is quite different but none of you wish to face it at this precise moment. It’s quite obvious that one day it will happen and it won’t be a fun moment for both of you. Being purposely ignorant can cause great pain, more than you can dream of. 

Once you arrive at his mansion, he invites you to enter first. Jungkook stays at the entrance, not moving at all. His eyes are devouring you. This is something he never thought he’d ever witness and he feels a mix of emotions. On one side, he’s actually very delighted that it’s happening but on the other side, he’s not very sure this is supposed to happen after all the pain you put him through. 

To him, you’re beautiful in every way. The green dress you’re wearing embraces your body perfectly, letting him see how imperfectly perfect your body is. It’s not the first time that he’s checking you out, he did it quite a lot when you were together. However, this time is different. This time comes after 10 years of no contact. It feels like he shouldn’t be doing it. 

You turn around to look at the man behind you. The way he’s staring at you catches you off guard and takes your breath instantly away. There’s affection and tenderness. With just one stare, a feeling of love grows inside you. This makes it more real that there’s a possibility of trying again. A possibility that warms your heart and scares the hell out of you at the same time. 

“You’re not coming?” you finally ask. 

“Yes, yes,” he agrees while entering and closing the door behind him. 

The precise moment he closes the door, he gets closer to you. A little too close. His eyes stare into yours, your heart starts beating faster as you realize how close you actually are. There’s barely any space between your faces. His eyes quickly look down at your lips, and unwittingly, yours do exactly the same. Suddenly, the tension between you becomes very tense and sexual. 

“Yn,” he whispers as he closes his eyes for a brief moment. 

In a matter of seconds, you both end up in the living room. The same room where you met for the first time his adorable daughter. Honestly, you don’t really know how you arrived there. Jungkook simply grabbed your hand before basically running through his house to the first room. 

Once in the room, your ex doesn’t hesitate, pressing his lips against yours for a fervent kiss. Even if this kiss is the mere result of the extremely high sexual tension between you, it still feels tender. It reminds you of the kisses exchanged while you were together. In the middle of this sensual moment, this kiss warms your heart. 

Your hands find their way to his hair while he kisses you hungrily. His hands are placed on your lower back, slowly pushing you closer to him. This feels like he doesn’t want you to run away from you, even for the slightest bit. For sure, you’re not going anywhere right now. You solely desire to lose yourself in all this lust. Until this flame isn’t consumed, there’s no way you’re leaving this house.  

To be honest, a couple of weeks ago, you would have never imagined kissing your ex-boyfriend again. The breakup wasn’t easy, plus, you were the type of person to be convinced that it’s never a good idea to get back with your ex. But oh lord, this is Jungkook. How can you ever resist this man? 

Jungkook slowly walks backward before sitting on the couch, causing you to sit down on his lap. He desires nothing more than to sense more friction. This action lifts your dress, revealing more of the skin on your legs. He’s yearning to touch you in every possible way but this closeness between your bodies is driving him crazy. The two of you are gasping hard but it clearly doesn’t matter. 

You desire more and more.

As you break the kiss, you quickly unbutton his shirt, revealing his bare skin to your eyes. You enjoy the view, his tattoos in full display just for you. His body is sculpted as a Greek god. His hard work at the gym has definitely paid off. What will forever surprise you is the fact that underneath his perfect suit, his arm is covered in tattoos. It seems so contradictory. But it only makes him even more desirable in your eyes. 

Jungkook glances at you. All that he can see in your eyes is lust. Honestly, it’s all that matters to him right now and it swells his chest with pride. You can’t help but touch his soft skin and he lets you do whatever you want. The CEO of Jeon Industries shivers from the feeling of your fingertips brushing against his skin. Your lips press against his, needing to be completely intoxicated by him. His tongue licks your bottom lip before his teeth grip it, making you moan. As he hears your sweet moan, his dick twitches inside his pants, he’s growing harder underneath you. 

When you open your mouth, Jungkook seizes the opportunity to slip his tongue inside to finally meet yours. A moan leaves your lips at the feeling, and unintentionally, Jungkook flexes his toned thigh underneath you. You feel it in all the right places, making your pussy clench around nothing and it causes you to whine again. 

This unintentional action ends up being a good thing and he can’t help but smirk. His hands move down on your exposed thighs to caress them. Your skin is soft under his palms, his hands feeling so huge on your body. Before doing anything else, Jungkook pulls one of his legs out from under you, making you sit on top of only one leg. As he does so, you adjust yourself on his thigh. Your dress is pushed even higher, Jungkook having now a proper view of your beige panties, your clothed pussy brushing now against his dark pants. 

Both of you know where this is going. Probably it isn’t a good idea but none of you wants to stop it. You’re getting addicted to the other more and more, and the thought of stopping doesn’t even cross your mind. 

“Fuck, yn,” he groans when you start moving your hips against his thigh.  

Jungkook presses his lips on yours for a filthy kiss, his tongue passing past your lips and licking against your own. This feels marvelous, everything about you is addictive, and Jungkook definitely desires to bring this to the next level. Honestly, it is a shared feeling.  

As his tongue plays with yours on your mouth, his hands find their way to your waist and guide your hips as you’re straddling his thigh. A small moan leaves your lips but the man in front of you swallows it directly. He pushes his thigh firmly against your clothed pussy and flexes the muscle once more. 

“I love the way you’re riding my thigh, princess,” he whispers against your lips. “But I need to feel you properly against my thigh.”  

One of his hands slides down on your body and tugs aside the fabric of your panties until your clit is directly pressed against his thigh. A breath falls from your lips as you drag your pussy against his thigh. Jungkook pulls you firmly against his flexed muscle, and once his hands are back on your waist, he quickens the pace of your hips. A trail of moans leaves your mouth, loving the friction of his pants against your pussy. 

“I adore to hear you moan, baby girl,” he whispers in your ear, sending shivers down your spine. 

His tongue licks your ear, a little trick that will bring you closer to the orgasm. A little trick that he learned when you were together. It’s your weakness, and he knows it. Since you’ve been very intimate together, he knows your body by heart and everything he needs to do to bring you down on your knees. However, by doing so, he also brings himself closer to the orgasm. Hearing you moaning and seeing you completely overwhelmed by what he does arouses him a lot. There’s proof of it right now as his length is getting harder and tighter on his pants. He’s definitely about to explode. 

Honestly, even if you would try to speak, you wouldn’t be able to form a proper sentence. Your mind is way too consumed by this blissful moment. You can’t even think properly but damn, you’re enjoying every second.   

“I will touch myself as you keep riding my thigh,” Jungkook says with quite some desperation in his voice. 

Before you can even process what he said, he gently inserts two fingers in your mouth, and with his other hand, he lowers his underwear, allowing his cock to slap against his lower stomach. His cock takes your breath away, standing proud in between your bodies. He’s thick and long, this sight alone gets you wetter.    

You suck on his finger, coating them with your saliva, and that alone snatches a groan out of his pretty swollen lips. A proud smile appears on your face. When he feels that they are soaked enough, he pulls them from your mouth. His fingers hold his cock, covering it with your saliva as they go up and down the length. 

This man is as filthy as he was before. It clearly reminds you of the beginning of your relationship, when you had your first time together. It was explosive because man, he had a lot of experience due to his fuckboy past. For sure, over time, it got even better because you started to discover each other.   

“Fuck,” he mumbles, his head slowly going back at the feeling of his fingers on his length and your clit rubbing against him. “You’re doing this so well, baby girl.”

You bite your bottom lip as you stare deep into his eyes. The intimacy of the eye contact with the friction against your clit makes the wave of pleasure grow intensely inside you, and you know that you won’t last long before that wave hits you hard.  

“Pleasuring yourself on my thigh while I touch myself,” he growls as his hand keeps pumping his cock. “It’s too hot, baby.” Jungkook runs his thumb over the tip of his cock and grips his bottom lip between his teeth. 

He strokes his cock at the same pace at which your hips are working on his thigh, and he also feels like he’s about to cum on his hand. 

“Fuck, baby girl,” he growls as he looks down to watch your throbbing pussy rubbing against his thigh, “you’re doing this perfectly.” 

You put your hand on his shoulder and circle your pussy faster against his thigh. You’re so close. 

“Jk,” you say and his gaze meets yours once again, “I’m so close!” 

The hand resting on your waist goes down and his thumb circles on your clit. It sends you over the edge, the orgasm hitting you hard and you feel it in every part of your body. A guttural moan leaves your mouth and you close your eyes to enjoy the feeling.  The sight of you coming undone makes him come, a deep groan coming from his throat as cum flows on his hand. 

You hide your face in the crook of his neck, completely surprised that you gave in to temptation. Nobody says anything, you’re just both trying to catch your breath and you close your eyes. 

Slowly, you fall asleep in his arms, exhausted from this wonderful night with him. Jungkook feels it but doesn’t say anything, enjoying having you in his arms. This hadn’t happened in years so he enjoys every single second passed with you. As you’re falling deeper, he moves a bit and you groan.

“I’m just putting back my pants, baby,” he whispers in your ear. He does it quickly to not disturb you more. “I’ll put you in my bed, you’ll be better.”

“No,” you mumble half-awake, “I want to stay in your arms.” 

Even though he craves nothing more than to have you in his arms, this position is very uncomfortable for the two of you. It’s best to go to his bed, it’s way more comfortable than his couch. Jungkook stands up, holding you tight in his arms. You mumble some words that he doesn’t understand, making him chuckle. Once in his bedroom, he carefully places you in his bed before lying beside you. He crawls to you, holding you again in his arms. 

“Have you introduced a girlfriend to Arya?” Eunji asks Jungkook. 

A little smile appears on his face. Undoubtedly, Arya has spoken about the flower situation to her mother or maybe she has mentioned the time when she met you at his place. Maybe she even mentioned both.  

“What did she tell you?” Jungkook asks the mother of his daughter. 

Honestly, Jungkook doesn’t even know how to explain this situation to Eunji. You’re not his girlfriend but you’re not a friend as well. You’re in an in-between situation. It’s a situationship like many people may say. 

“Apparently, she met a ‘female’ friend of yours and she helped you choose a bouquet of flowers. A bouquet that I deduced you offered to that said friend,” she tells him. 

“Well,” he starts saying, “I’ve been seeing my ex.”

His mind is brought back to three nights ago when you went on a date. The next day, the two of you went completely wild. You stayed at his place and spent almost the entire day having sex. It was wild but definitely amazing. There’s no doubt that the physical attraction is still very much present. 

“Yn?” she asks. 

Of course, she has heard about you. They’ve been friends for quite some time and he has been very open about his past with you. She knows that you’re the only ex he’d ever see again, that you’re the only ex he ever loved.  

Jungkook simply nods, not knowing what to say to her. Actually, he wants to first see her reaction before adding anything else. Honestly, he’s scared of her reaction, he deeply cares about her and her opinion. At the end of the day, she’s the mother of his daughter, they are linked forever. 

“Jk, are you sure it’s a good idea?” she asks him.

She’s quite concerned about him. Even if she always knew that he still deeply loved you, she constantly prayed that you wouldn’t meet again. She doesn’t want him to be heartbroken once more. He doesn’t deserve it, he has a golden heart she’ll protect at any cost. 

“At this stage, we’re simply talking and hanging out together. Nothing more,” he tells her. 

In a way, she’s happy that Arya told her about all this because now, she’ll keep an eye on her daughter’s father. Also, if he gets heartbroken once more, inevitably it will have an impact on their daughter as well. She’ll see her father constantly sad even if Jungkook tries to hide it and she’ll try to cheer him up.  

“But would you want to try again?” she raises with concern. 

“Honestly, I don’t know,” he starts saying. “I love being with her, talking about the past, and discovering what we have become. For sure, everything is different but it scares and excites me at the same time.” 

Being around you is a blessing for him but when you’re not together in your little bubble, he thinks about the full situation. It’s extremely frightening. There’s some trust that has been broken, and a heart that aches. Also, your lives are totally different. Jungkook is a father, running one of the biggest companies in the country. You’re his employee, you’ve been engaged and you lost your sister. You’re both totally different people now. 

However, this is a situation that he kept dreaming of for the past ten years. Every day, he wished you’d come back. So he believes he can’t throw away this opportunity but if it doesn’t work out, at least, he would have tried. He wouldn’t regret and he’s convinced that he would more easily move on from you.   

“It’s normal, Jk,” she says, “so much time has passed.” 

He couldn’t agree more with her. Ten years is quite a lot and it’s definitely what also scares him. What if in the end, it’s never the right time? What if you are never meant to get back together? All those questions keep haunting him when he’s by himself. Nevertheless, he tries to not overthink. It’s unquestionably not a good idea, especially since he has so much to think about at work.       

“I know,” he answers while running his hand through his hair. “But I don’t want to overthink this situation, let’s take it day by day and we’ll see the outcome.” 

Eunji simply nods. Obviously, he’s not comfortable talking about all this right now. She’s not going to force him, it has to come from him. 

“Just try to be careful with Arya,” she reminds him. “She’s very young and it’s best she isn’t involved in our relationships before we’re secure it’s serious.” 

They established this rule years ago. It has always seemed so easy for Jungkook to respect it since he only had one-night stands but this time around, it appears quite difficult. Arya already met you by accident, she sometimes questions him about you. 

“I’m aware of it, Eunji and I’ll make sure they never meet again,” he answers. 

She smiles, happy that he’ll ensure that her daughter isn’t involved in a heartbreak. Knowing Arya, she’ll also be sad if suddenly she stops seeing you. She can easily get attached to people so it’s always best to provide her with some stability. 

The little girl suddenly appears in the kitchen where both her parents are. She smiles when she sees them, a smile they both return back to her. She’s the person they both love the most, she lights their world in a way they can’t express. This love is what will forever tie them together. They created this wonderful little girl. Jungkook always believed they did a good job when conceiving and educating her. 

“Is mommy eating too tonight?” she asks, looking at them two. 

Before Eunji has the time to answer, Jungkook proceeds to reply to his daughter. 

“Yes, she is,” he says with a bright smile, “We’ll have a little family dinner.” 

Happiness suddenly radiates from Arya’s face. Her mother can’t say no now that Jungkook said she’ll stay. Her daughter’s father trapped her but she won’t complain. She adores it when the three of them spend time together. Those moments are rare however they are always filled with joy. What always warms their heart is seeing how content Arya is. Nothing will ever beat that.   

The entire night, Jungkook completely forgets about you. There’s just him, Eunji, and Arya. This is a moment deeply cherished that will forever stay in his heart. This is a moment that can heal his broken heart. This is a moment where time completely stops. This is a moment where he’s simply proud of the family he built. He’d do everything to protect them at all costs. For sure, this isn’t the kind of family he expected to have but his family is perfect. At the end of the day, both he and Eunji try as hard as they can to make everything work, which is all that really matters. 

At some point, he just looks at them with a big smile on his face. 

Eunji and him never tried to be together. They had a one-night stand that resulted in creating Arya but never have they thought of getting involved romantically. They have always been good friends and amazing co-parents. It’s sometimes not easy but what’s important is that they always find a common ground. 

There are some moments where he wonders how things would have looked like if you remained together. Would he have started his company? Would you have started a family? Would you be married? Would you be happy together? All those questions will forever remain unanswered but he’s very proud of everything he accomplished with this void inside his heart. 

For sure, getting his heart broken made him work hard. So hard that he built the Jeon Empire from scratch. An empire that started with Jeon Industries. An empire that he’ll bequeath to his daughter. This would have probably never existed with you by his side. 

But now that he has it all, will he manage to have the one last thing that he’s always wanted? Or will it be too much for him to handle? 

For the past month, you and Jungkook have been seeing each other quite often. Of course, it’s impossible when he’s with his daughter, which is totally understandable. She comes first and he needs to spend as much time as possible with her. You would never dare to even say anything about it, you actually even encourage him to spend more time with her. Those moments together are what she will forever remember and cherish. 

As you enter the elevator, you notice at the end the man that haunts your dreams. A little smile appears on your face. Without any hesitation, you make your way to the end to be near him. There’s no doubt that you’re not going to be able to say or do anything as there are other employees. But you can be near each other, even for a brief moment. When you get closer to him, he also notices you. Jungkook tries to hide the little smile forming on his face. 

“Miss y/l/n,” he speaks when you’re next to him. 

“Mr. Jeon,” you reply. 

If anyone was truly looking at you, they would notice the way you’re staring at each other. Or should we say, the way you’re devouring each other with your gaze. There’s so much affection and tenderness in his eyes, it immediately warms your heart. Jungkook doesn’t have to say anything, his eyes speak louder than any word he could ever say. Whenever he lands his eyes on you, he always feels loved. Every part of his being feels it. He doesn’t doubt that his feelings are reciprocated. 

Scared to be caught, you look away. Being this close while he’s your boss is kind of a tricky situation. Honestly, you’re truly considering quitting the company. This is becoming way too delicate, you can’t stay in this company while you’re clearly in love with your boss. It’s not about what people would say because honestly, you don’t give a shit about it. It’s just that it can create conflicts of interest. He’s your superior, and your relationship might affect any decision he makes regarding you. And knowing yourself, you’ll always believe that whatever decision he makes will always be considered to help your career. 

Actually, you’ve already prepared your resignation letter. It’s sitting in a drawer of your desk, waiting for the perfect moment to be given to the director of your department, Kim Taehyung. The excuse you’ll give is that working in a massive company such as Jeon Industries caused you more anxiety than expected. Taehyung will for sure be surprised and will probably convince you to stay. You haven’t been here for a year but it’s most likely the best to do. Nobody needs to know the truth but you can’t stay while this love is blossoming. 

Quickly, your eyes gaze at Jungkook once more. It breaks your heart to think that you’ll leave the company any time soon. However, it will be easier for you two. The CEO notices the quick glance you took but he doesn’t do anything. He’s too afraid of what he could do or say in the presence of his other employees. Once you reach the fifth level, you leave the elevator with a heavy heart. You love being near Jungkook, it’s rather hard to be far from him. Your ex watches you walk away from him. Just like you, it’s hard to see you exit the elevator, putting a physical distance between you. 

Pretending that there’s nothing going on between you is extremely hard. This is the other reason pushing you to leave the company. As time passes, you both grow confident that this is the right time for you but one day or another, the other people working here will notice it. It will be even harder to quit then. It’s better to take measures before the inevitable happens. 

The rest of the day goes by quite fast for you but the resignation letter has been a lot more present on your mind. So it has led you to this precise moment. You’re in front of Jungkook’s secretary’s desk, waiting for her to let you inside his office. Your heart is beating extremely fast in your chest, your hands are shaking, and you’re getting very nervous. 

“Miss y/l/n, you can come in,” she says with a little smile while she holds the door. 

You nod before walking in her direction. “Thank you,” you tell her as you pass in front of her. She closes the door behind you, leaving you now alone with the big boss. 

When you enter the massive room, you find Jungkook walking in your direction, clear concern painted on his face. Your eyes scan him, he’s wearing a white shirt with dark blue suit pants. His sleeves are slightly lifted, he was for sure very focused on his work. Now you feel guilty to be bothering him with your shitty thing. He was probably working on something way more important than you, you think.

What you totally ignore is that the company is facing quite a huge problem. An issue that Jungkook is trying to solve but it’s been hard. He was working on it before his secretary announced your presence. 

“Yn,” he speaks, “is everything okay?” 

Jungkook is concerned because never before you came to his office. As soon as his secretary said your name, his heart started racing in his chest, his mind imagining the worst happened to you. 

He gets close to you, his hands grab your face and his eyes scan your face to make sure you’re doing well. He sees something in your eyes that he can’t quite describe. There’s some sadness, that’s undeniable but there’s something else. A something that he can’t quite put his finger on. 

“Everything is fine, Jk,” you tell him with a little smile appearing on your face. 

“No, there’s something otherwise you wouldn’t be here,” he instantly replies back. 

Indubitably, this man knows you, but it doesn’t surprise you. You’ve been spending the last month talking a lot, and you also dated for 2 years in the past. 

“I will give my resignation letter to Mr. Kim tomorrow morning,” you inform him. 

Before quitting, you wanted to inform him personally. You didn’t want him to find it out through Taehyung that you’ll be leaving. Knowing him, he’ll be very angry. 

“Why?” he frowns. 

“Because of all this between us,” you immediately reply. 

Jungkook takes a step back to look at you properly. To be honest, this surprises him a lot. In his mind, you were never going to quit and you would figure out together how to navigate this situation. But he was obviously wrong. 

“I can’t stay here while we flirt together outside work,” you add. “You’re my superior and inevitably, it will be a problem one day. It will be a lot harder to leave at that time so I prefer to do it now.” 

“No,” he answers while turning his back on you. 

“This is my decision, Jungkook, not yours.” 

There’s no way you’re letting this man tell you what to do. Leaving is your decision and he can’t object. Actually doing it will make you quite angry. It's a decision that will benefit you both. Plus, it seems obvious that he can’t leave his company. 

“It’s something we should discuss together before making this kind of decision,” he replies. He doesn’t turn around to look at you. He’s still in shock at what he just heard, it feels unreal to him. 

“We both know you’ll never agree to it or you’ll try to find a solution but the only reasonable solution is me finding a job in another company,” you explain while walking in his direction. 

Jungkook shakes his head. He’s convinced there’s another way but he can’t let you lose this opportunity of working in one of the best companies. He knows how happy you were to join his company, he knows it was your dream because this would be a massive opportunity for you to work with the best people in the industrie. Seeing each other can’t be a barrier to that. 

“Look at you,” you say, “you’re completely refusing it but I have to go, I have to work somewhere else if we want to give a shot at whatever we are doing. I choose you over this job.” 

Maybe it’s not the best decision you’re making because you should never put a man before your dreams. But that man ain’t any man. With Jungkook, you also speak a lot about work and together, you can help each other. Even if you start working for another company, he will give you his input in whatever you’re doing, if you ask it of course. For sure, you wouldn’t be able to tell him what project you’re working on but if you ask him what he thinks of this or that, he’ll gladly help. At the end of the day, you both did the same studies. 

“You can’t do that, you can’t choose me over your career,” he says while finally facing you. 

“But think about it,” you start saying. “If I stay, it will generate a conflict of interest for you. We will both be in an uncomfortable position, I will doubt every decision you make that involves me and you’ll also consider me when making a decision. That’s not right, neither for us nor for the other employees,” you argue. 

Jungkook has already thought about this all but he knows there will be no impact. He’s way too high in the hierarchy and you’re at the bottom. Taehyung is the one making decisions directly involving you, but still there, there’s your manager, Jimin in between you and Taehyung. In any case, Taehyung’s decisions will be made following instructions that he received from Hoseok, the CFO, and that he directly received from Jungkook. There are some people involved in between. His instructions will only be considered for the sake of the company. Nothing more, nothing less. 

“Look, there are Hoseok, Taehyung, and Jimin between us.” It seems so weird to you to hear the first names of your superiors. “My decisions are made for the sake of the company so I don’t see how it can directly affect you and only you. The three of them follow my instructions but they can adapt them. Most of the time my instructions are simply a result that I expect from a specific department but then how the result is obtained doesn’t matter to me,” he explains. 

There’s no need to be a genius to know how a decision can benefit you. 

“You’re quite close to Taehyung because he’s one of the best in his area. If he tells you that I did well, you can seize that opportunity to convince him to promote me as manager or whatever you think of. That can be an unfair treatment because you like me.” 

You wanted to say ‘because you love me’ but that seems a bit too much since you’re not exactly sure of his feelings for you. However, that’s what Jungkook wanted to hear because he still loves you. But it’s better you didn’t say it. 

“You can say whatever you want Jk but I won’t change my mind,” you say. “My decision is made.” 

Well, Jungkook is perfectly aware of it. That’s something that didn’t change about you. Once you’re convinced about something, wrong or right, nobody can change your mind. You’re way too stubborn.

“Well, then I appreciate you informing me before going to Taehyung,” he simply replies. 

There’s for sure some disappointment in his face but deep down, he knows you’re right. In the long run, the situation will be problematic one way or another. But he would have preferred that you gain some more experience in his company before leaving. It would only be beneficial for you. 

“I better be going, Jimin will probably get worried,” you say. 

Jungkook nods. Both of you proceed to get back to work without saying anything else. The rest of the day, you don’t speak or text. There’s like a thin wall of ice that appeared between you, and it’s scaring you both. But since you want to try to get back together, you’ll both pretend that it isn’t there. Almost as if you’re voluntarily closing your eyes because you don’t want to lose each other. 

Since you didn’t like the way yesterday went by, you decide to show up at his place. Before appearing unexpectedly, you made sure that Arya wasn't there. Jungkook has been making sure that you don’t randomly end up meeting Arya. You couldn’t agree more with this decision. 

“Yn?” he says with surprise when he opens the door. 

The man standing in front of you is still wearing his suit. Immediately, you understand that he’s still working. Probably something has happened at work which needs to be solved. 

“Sorry to come up out of the blue, I didn’t mean to bother you,” you start saying. “I just want to have a conversation with you, especially after what happened yesterday.” 

Jungkook nods before letting you inside. As soon as you step inside, he presses his lips against yours. This is very surprising but honestly, it feels absolutely wonderful. Feeling his lips against yours is extremely intoxicating. You’re completely addicted to him. 

“Are you okay?” you whisper against his lips. 

“I just need you, yn,” he mumbles. 

Things have been hard at work for Jungkook. Unfortunately, it has been affecting him in general. Whenever he’s alone, away from you, he wonders if indeed it’s a good idea to try again. He hates himself for thinking that way because he has always wanted to be with you. He never moved on from you. But now that he has you once more, he simply doesn’t know. He’s completely lost. 

Before you can understand, you’re in his bedroom exchanging fervent kisses. You’re both intoxicated by each other, lost in your little bubble. In a matter of seconds, you’re both naked, his head in between your legs, eating you out like a starving man. Your moans quickly echo in his bedroom, his name leaving your lips while Jungkook procures you a lot of pleasure. You have orgasms upon orgasms and it doesn’t stop him at all. It’s pleasantly overwhelming. 

Throughout the time he eats you out, he strokes his cock. Hearing you moaning and feeling your fluids on his face and tongue excite him more than he can explain. It doesn’t take him a long time before he’s hard as a rock. His mind is fully consumed by lust. All he can think of is to fuck you. 

Once he senses that he has tortured you enough, he stands up, placing himself on top of you. There’s no need to talk to understand that he’s going to penetrate you in the next few seconds. On the moment, none of you think of using protection. You’re just completely lost in your burning desire. With no surprise, he penetrates you. It causes an instantly deep moan to leave your throat. Jungkook adores seeing you underneath him in this state. You’re intoxicated by each other. 

Sloppy kisses are exchanged while he fills you up with his little monster. He takes you in every position possible, pushing both your limits. You stop counting the orgasms you have, it’s just too much but in a delicious way. You take all that he gives you until your body gives up. Your body actually starts trembling quite fast after he fills you up. 

After what seemed like an eternity, Jungkook completely explodes inside you. It’s at that precise moment that you realize that you didn’t use any protection. But you’re too lost to say or do anything about it. Your lover stands up, grabbing a tissue to clean his cock. On your end, you stand up to use his bathroom. It’s always recommended to pee right after sex. You never miss doing it even if all your fluids left your body while having intercourse. 

When you come back into the room, you find him sitting on the end of his bed. He looks absolutely devastated. You haven’t seen him that way in years. You run to his side, taking him in your arms. The second he feels your arms wrapped against him, he bursts into tears. You instantly close your eyes since it absolutely crushes you to hear him cry. 

Whilst he cries in your arms, you don’t say anything. You’re simply there for him, trying to comfort him with your simple presence. Seeing such a strong man in this state indicates that he has really reached a low point. This time you’re going to be there for him and help him. This time you’re not going to give up on him. He doesn’t deserve it. He never deserved it the way you treated him in the past. 

“I’m here,” you finally mumble while pressing a kiss on top of his head. 

His hands on top of your arms hold you tighter, almost as if he’s scared you let go of him. But you’re not going anywhere until he hasn’t calmed down. You’re probably even going to spend the night here with him. There’s no way you’re leaving him alone when he’s like this. 

“I’m so lost, yn,” he whispers. “I’m way too lost.” 

It breaks your heart to listen to him saying that. 

“There’s too much going on at Jeon Industries,” he says. “Having you quit the company is also hard because I feel like I’ve failed everywhere with it. I don’t know what to do anymore, I just want to throw it all away and just stay with Arya.” 

You kneel down to see his face. It breaks your heart even more when you see his face ravaged by tears. His weeping eyes find yours. 

“You haven’t failed anything, Jungkook,” you say in an attempt to comfort him, “you actually exceed everywhere.” 

Your thumbs clean the tears running down his cheeks. You don’t wish to see him like this, it’s way too heartbreaking. 

“Remember when you were talking about building your own company?” you ask and he nods straight away. “It was simply a dream back then but you made it happen. All by yourself. It’s even one of the biggest companies in the country. You can be proud of yourself for all that.” 

Even if you weren’t together, you felt so much pride seeing him building his empire. He accomplished more than he ever described to you. Times might sometimes be hard but that’s part of life. It would be boring if we didn't face a little challenge. In the end, it is what makes the taste of victory feel even better. 

“This is a challenging time for Jeon Industries but it’s temporary, you’ll totally overcome it because you’re Jeon Jungkook. The smartest person I’ve ever met.” 

Jungkook places his hand on top of yours. This warms his heart more than he can even express. Being around feels absolutely good. 

“And I’m simply leaving the company so I can be by your side, I’m not going anywhere,” you finish. 

He closes his eyes. His life is falling apart in front of his eyes, everything is out of control. Of his control. The only thing secure is his daughter. All the rest is simply overwhelming. Too overwhelming. He needs a break from the world. Even one from you. 

A week has passed since the crying incident at his place. You’ve been quite concerned with him but he hasn’t been talking much with you. However, for the past few days, you have given him the space that he needs. He’s not going well so you’re not going to force him to open up with you. 

Today, he has invited you to join him in a little park. Seeing that message brought a bright smile to your face because you’ve been excited to be with him. You imagined that he probably prepared a little cute date to just get his mind off work. But strangely, when you reach the park, you find him sitting on a bench, his face looking down at the grass. 

When he hears you getting close, he stands up. He doesn’t smile at all. Actually, you can’t read his face at all. It catches you off guard. This isn’t something you expected to see at all and it doesn’t sound good at all. Instantaneously, your heart starts pounding extremely fast at the same time that your hands start shaking. You’re scared of whatever he might say today. 

“Thanks for coming, yn,” he starts saying. “I truly appreciate it.” 

Jungkook doesn’t move closer, putting a clear distance between you. This man standing in front of you isn’t the man you have been hanging out with lately. This man is barely recognizable. 

“There’s no problem,” you reply.

“As I have told you, I’ve been feeling extremely lost lately,” you nod. “Everything is way too overwhelming for me and I simply don’t know what to do. But I know that having you back in my life is one of the reasons I’m feeling this way,” he explains. “I’ve always wanted you back but I never considered the consequences it would have on me. To be honest, I don’t know how to handle having you in my life again. Everything is different. I’m not the Jungkook you used to know. I used the pain you caused to build this new life. Everything I have today is because of all the suffering you put me through so how can I have you in my life with all this?” 

Tears start running down his face. This is too hard. It’s hard to realize that the person he has ever wanted in his life is the same one who is causing all this pain. The way he’s feeling right now is mainly because of you. Without you, this issue at Jeon Industries would have been solved quickly and wouldn’t have made him cry like a baby. 

“When we’re not together, when I’m not in our bubble, my mind starts wondering a lot. I question all that I have right now and wonder how my life would have been if you had never left me. The only certainty that I have is that nothing would be like this,” he pauses for a couple of seconds. “I keep overthinking everything and it’s driving me completely crazy. I’m currently not happy and this is not possible when I have a daughter to take care of. I have to take care of myself to provide her with the most wonderful life.” 

To hear all those words shatters your heart into a million pieces. 

“I would like to say that I want to date you again, I truly want to. What we have been having, I’ve been dreaming of it for ten years but it’s too much for me right now,” he continues. “We need to put an end to this right now before I simply explode and destroy everything. I don’t want to hurt you or anybody around me, especially my daughter.” 

What you feared most is happening. Jungkook is pushing you away because he’s hurting just like you did ten years ago. However, you’re the person responsible for his suffering. He’s pushing you away because you’re still causing him a lot of pain. 

“I need space and time to heal,” he finalizes. 

For a moment, you simply stare at each other. Jungkook is waiting for an answer from you but you’re not capable of saying anything. This is way too surprising for you but you need time to process every word that he just said. But this breaks you. More than words can say. 

“I’m going, yn,” he says when he notices that you’re not reacting. “Take care,” he says before leaving you. Now, you’re brokenhearted alone in the middle of a park. It seems that in the end, it wasn’t the right time for you and Jungkook.

the hardest part | requested

⇢ pairing: jungkook x reader ⇢ fic type: one shot ⇢ genre: angst ⇢ word count: 2.5K ⇢ theme: bestfriend!jungkook + friend zone ⇢ warnings: i don’t think there are any?? its kinda sad lol. ⇢ synopsis: for years, you have been in love with your best friend. you regretted not saying anything about it… and it only gets worse when his wedding is just around the corner. ⇢ A/N: hope you like this! wrote the entire thing listening to the the hardest part by roy kim, listen to it while reading it… it’s even sadder that way :(

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