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Klaus and Rebekah -- Abuse
I often call Klaus out for his treatment of his siblings. Just like I call out the majority of the characters for their behavior. However, Klaus stans get very offended when I do this, even though they are the ones who say they love how evil he is. I often get accused of being biased and 'hating' Klaus. I promise you, I don't. I do not care enough about any fictional character to hate them. I may not like them or they aren't my favorite characters, but I clearly still tolerate them enough to watch the show. It's also funny because I don't talk about my least favorite characters specifically because I don't like them. Therefore, the fact that I spend time talking about Klaus means I like him to an extent. I like aspects of his character and was disappointed in his lack of development.
Too many people want to erase his abuse towards Rebekah or, even worse, justify it. As someone with a degree in Psychology and who works every day with victims of abuse, I wanted to break this down for the fandom.
First, I cannot stand it when Klaus stans want to pretend Klaus's actions are justified. Abuse is never justified. Mikael's treatment of Klaus was not okay even if Mikael thought he was creating a strong warrior. And Klaus' treatment of Rebekah is not okay even if he thinks he knows best.
Second, being abused and having trauma does not justify or relieve responsibility from someone if they then become an abuser themselves. It does happen, unfortunately, but they need to be held responsible as abusers.
Third, there are different types of abuse. One is not more damaging than another, they are all terrible and cause long-lasting trauma.
Psychical Abuse
![Klaus And Rebekah -- Abuse](https://64.media.tumblr.com/a73fecabce612aa761e83f59fa139645/576be762ba51fd3a-2c/s400x600/9080e90ca14c32e5e4db587ebb8c27a0ecc85bda.gif)
"Involves the use of physical violence, or threats of it, to maintain power over an individual. Because of this, survivors are afraid and uncertain when more abuse will occur. This often reinforces the regular use of other, more subtle, types of abuse."
Physical abuse is the one that is talked about the most because it is so easy to see. Klaus has been physically abusing Rebekah for about 900 years. He does it so frequently that she often flinches away from him. She never knows what to expect from him, if he is going to be a loving brother or revert back to her abuser. This creates its own trauma as she loves the caring side of her brother but is terrified of what he can turn into. It's part of the reason they have such a codependent bond. She still sees the brother she loves and wants to save him.
The first moment of physical abuse that we see is after the Hunters dagger their family and Klaus slaughters them all. Klaus grabs her roughly and screams in her face. This is after Rekekah wakes up covered in blood and sees the man she loves dead. She is clearly terrified of Klaus in this scene. People will try to justify this and say Klaus was "in the right" since Rebekah shouldn't have trusted the Hunter. But, I'll refer you back to my first point, we do not blame victims for their abuse, we do not justify abusers in their actions. Rebekah did not plot against her family. She made a mistake in trusting someone, a mistake that everyone in that family has made. Hell, Klaus is sleeping with Genevive while she is actively trying to murder his child. He sleeps with Aurora while she kidnaps Rebekah and throws her into the ocean. But Rebekah was in love with the Hunter. Even after what he did, she still buried him in peace. Klaus was not in love with the women he allowed close to him and hurt his family. He does not have a moral high ground. And even if he did, again, we do not justify abuse.
This event starts a cycle of abuse. Klaus holds onto the weapons, even though, at this time he is not any stronger than his siblings and they cannot be used against him. He doesn't do it to protect them but to threaten them. Anytime they disagree with him, he threatens to take years away from them, to strip them of their bodily autonomy. They are so scared of those daggers that they won't even stand against Klaus for each other.
We don't see much of their lives, but in every era after this, we see Klaus physically abusing Rebekah. He is constantly waving the daggers around and using them against her. This is physical abuse. He is stripping her bodily autonomy away from her and taking years of her life away from her. We don't know how many times this happens but we know she lost 14 years of her life in the span of 200 years, so I can only imagine how much of her life she truly missed out on.
In the 1800s, he threatens her away from Marcel and when she doesn't obey him, he daggers her and costs her 52 years of her life. In 1920, he daggers her for wanting to be with Stefan, taking 90 years of her life away. In Season 4 TVD, he daggers her for months because she doesn't want to help him make his hybrids.
He has no problem choking her and breaking her neck after he left her to be abused and tortured by vampire hunters. He compels Marcel to kill her witch body if she disobeys him. Not to mention the sanitorium episode where she is running, scared for her life from her brother. He constantly threatens her with bodily harm if she goes against him.
Emotional Abuse
![Klaus And Rebekah -- Abuse](https://64.media.tumblr.com/0282f650bd3e2480219d821fb4d97f90/576be762ba51fd3a-71/s500x750/1c13763cae0d46d8db9c0ba8986cc9b221515bd7.gif)
"Includes non-physical behaviors that are meant to control, isolate, or frighten someone. These behaviors are often more subtle and hard to identify but are just as serious as other types of abuse."
Even as a human Klaus is condescending to Rebekah, telling her she cannot play with knives because she is a girl, despite the fact that Rebekah is the only one of his siblings who has ever been brave enough to stand up to Mikael. I know it is the times, but as a reminder, Viking women often wielded swords.
Klaus emotionally manipulates Rebekah from early on. He continues to gaslight her and make her emotionally dependent on him. He even jokes about his abuse to her and their siblings, often make jokes about daggering them and finding a place to store them if they disagree.
The first time is right after they are turned when Klaus tells Rebekah their father killed their mother. This is a lie. He killed Esther and he knows it. He tells Rebekah that so she won't leave him. Even if it comes from a place of fear, this is emotional manipulation. He does not allow Rebekah to make an informed decision. Their entire vow is based on this lie.
Klaus is very good at framing himself as the victim and making his siblings feel guilty, even when he has done the same or worse. He refers to himself as their "bastard-brother" often and talks about them abandoning him, which is just a lie. Rebekah and Elijah never once abandoned him for 900 years. Elijah only left to lead Mikael away and the only time we see Rebekah leave is when she is daggered. Yes, Rebekah begins to act in reaction to Klaus' abuse, but it takes about 700 years of being abused before she even does this. Also, you can't use Rebekah calling Mikael as an explanation since he didn't find out about that until 2012/2013.
I would also like to point out, Klaus is celebrated for killing his abuser but Rebekah is condemned for 'trying' to kill hers. I also hold that she didn't actually want him dead, she acted in pain and instantly regretted it. He is also the one who abandons her multiple times, even leaving her in Mystic Falls after she has been daggered for 90 years.
Klaus has no compassion for Rebekah's feelings. He is constantly belittling her for loving or caring for others. He would often make comments, especially in front of others, about her being stupid or naive. Like making fun of her love for Alexander in front of Stefan or making fun of her in front of Marcel. This is a very common way for abusers to control their victims. If the victim feels small and insignificant, they do not feel brave enough to leave. He constantly makes her feel like she is nothing, that she has nothing so she has no choice but to stay with him.
He lets her think he is dead for days, despite what he knows it will do to her. When he reveals himself, he leaves her in the hands of self-declared vampire hunters and makes no move to rescue her even later.
And then Klaus' moment of 'growth' is when he doesn't kill her in the cemetery in Season 1, but "sets her free." Again, this is a way for him to exercise his control over her life. He is exiling her but frames it in a way that he is the good guy. He has complete control over her life still. She is not allowed to return to see Marcel, Hayley, Elijah, or anyone. She only is able to return when Klaus needs her.
Sexual Abuse
![Klaus And Rebekah -- Abuse](https://64.media.tumblr.com/b715fad86d5339f6b3d6f7e407c7c8ae/576be762ba51fd3a-eb/s250x400/8c72b30b58e34bc0f066ae0883fc5c4f0fb9eacf.gif)
"Sexual abuse is when a partner controls the physical and sexual intimacy in a relationship. This often involves acting in a way that is non-consensual and forced."
I think we can all admit, Klaus and Rebekah have a very strange relationship. He is very possessive of her and it often comes across as a toxic boyfriend.
For some reason, Rebekah has to ask her brothers' permission to turn her boyfriend, Emil, into a vampire. Further showing her lack of autonomy. Klaus laughs at her and shames her for her love life. He then takes it a step further and throws Emil off the balcony, proving to Rebekah once again that she is not allowed to have anyone in her life outside of him. He even does it with his siblings when he sees Rebekah and Elijah acting too close, he attempts to victimize himself, pretending they are excluding him because he is their half-brother, rather than for the real reason that he has hurt them once again.
The next romantic interest for Rebekah is Marcel. I'm not going to get into the problems there, but we do need to acknowledge the grooming that occurred. But that is not why Klaus is opposed to the relationship. He doesn't want Rebekah to pursue Marcel because he views them as being his. He doesn't want them to have anything in their life outside of him. When she disobeys, he punishes her. He doesn't punish Marcel even though Marcel was the one who pursued her. He only punishes her. Not only does he dagger her, but he barters her life for Marcel's desire to become a vampire. He does this specifically to drive an even deeper wedge between Rebekah and Marcel, so that when he undaggers her after 52 years, she will not seek a relationship with Marcel.
Klaus then wants props for later "giving permission" for Marcel and Rebekah to have a relationship. It is completely sick that he thinks he is allowed to regulate his sister's love life.
Rebekah next forms an attachment with Stefan. She actually meets Stefan first, but because Klaus is jealous, he is constantly throwing fits in the 20s and wants to separate the two. When it is time to run, he doesn't give Stefan the chance to come with them. He compels Stefan to forget about them, despite it being Rebekah's boyfriend. Rebekah decides she wants to stay with him and he daggers her for 90 years for this 'betrayal.' In fact, he only releases her when he plans to use her against Stefan. When he is done with her, he abandons her in Mystic Falls to go create his own family of hybrids.
And if you think this is okay because Rebekah is 'breaking their vow,' I want you to really think about that. Rebekah is 900 years old and not allowed to essentially move out and start her own life because her older brother never learned to make his own friends/romantic partners.
I also think we need to evaluate the vow. While Klaus may have kept to the words of it, he did not keep to the meaning of it. "Always and forever" was meant to show their loyalty and love for each other. Not that they were not allowed to have their own lives. Klaus broke his vow by keeping them in a box and robbing years of their lives. That is not an act of love but an act of abuse.
When they are back in New Orleans, he is constantly using her past with Marcel against her. He blames her for the issues with Marcel even though he was the one who introduced Marcel to the family and supposedly raised him. It is just another way to emotionally manipulate her as well as control her romantic life.
And then at the end of The Originals, the only glimpse of remorse we see is that he tells Caroline to get the cure for Rebekah. He doesn't apologize for the thousand years of abuse he inflicted on her and acts like this one act (which he has very little to do with) will make up for the rest of it. Someone recently pointed out the timing of it. Klaus didn't want her to take the cure before, but now that he is dying, he is fine with it. Since the show did very little to show growth in his relationship with Rebekah, it's not out of the realm of possibility that he has it in his head that Rebekah will be able to join him in the afterlife sooner if she takes the cure.
All of this to say, Klaus spent 900 years abusing his sister. Yes, she began to react against him, but that doesn't make it okay for him to continue to abuse her. It is fine to like Klaus' character, but it is not fine to justify abuse. People suffer this type of abuse every day and justifying it on social media allows this abuse to continue to be justified in real life. Don't be so blinded by a fictional character as to hurt real-life victims.