Gru Wtf - Tumblr Posts

; Gru is the most powerful being in the universe, and here's why: according to the height of a Minion ( which is 3.5ft on average ) Gru is 4 Minions tall, which means he is a godly size of 14 fucking feet tall. Secondly if you remember there is a scene where Vector kidnaps the girls and shoots a series of tracking missiles at Gru, he dodges them *all*. According to the speed of an average ballistic missile ( 1900mph ) and the size of the missile according to his ankle size, Gru can perceive and move at such a speed that the missiles onl move 9.5 miles per hour, 0.5% of their original speed. Plus after this Gru punches a shark and it is left paralyzed, meaning it's spine is probably *shattered*, to remind you it would require a force greater than 3,000 newtons to fracture the spine. That's equal to the impact created by a 500 pound car crashing into a wall at 30 fucking miles per hour.

Thank you for coming to my Ted Talk.