Hes Always Been Good At Deluding Himself - Tumblr Posts

[the journal you see is journal 4, he ripped off the number and fingers out of anger (great another diary edgy edition) ]

After the portal incident Ford fell into a heavy depression making Bill leave him because he got bored, once Ford had gotten a metal plate installed into his skull by a sketchy doctor he eventually got the idea to showcase his life's work so he wouldn't die as a failure. Ford knows he cannot show the real deal to the tourists so he spends his time creating realistic models of the creatures he’s studied keeping him busy. He refuses to have made up creatures like Mabel suggest because he views it as a mockery and scam it reminds him of someone

When the kids came for the summer he gained some confidence and weight after Mabel's much needed "mandatory self care" days. Ford loves both kids to death but has trouble showing it. Sees himself within Dipper resulting in him spending more time with the boy unintentionally separating the twins

After faking Stanley's death with a car crash he drags back the Stanmobile having it fixed and sitting in a locked garage with Ford staring at it for hours at a time repeating the words “he’s gone and there’s nothing I can do”