Iz Shitposts - Tumblr Posts
#in his goop #the slop zone
You understand exactly. My people. Also the longer I listen to this song the dumber it gets in my head and I’m just laughing to myself at this point because of what a stupid video-game cutscene ass idea this is.
Skoodge: WoOAw, you know…? They were right, you are uglier than I am.
Dib: ???You’re not Zim.
Skoodge: Huh? Nah, nah… why, you looking for him?
Dib (increasingly weirded out): Yeah, well, originally. Are you- is this another Tak situation?
[He ignores Dib for a moment to ruffle around in the empty chip bag.]
Dib: Ahem ?
Skoodge: No, no everything’s fine. I don’t think anyone even knows I’m here. He’ll be back uhhhh-
Skoodge: sometime. Yah. I’m not worried about it.
[Dib takes a step back.]
Dib: O-kay, well, I’m just gonna- yeah.
[He gestures to his camera, stopping suddenly when he spots a comically conspicuous raygun-looking object he somehow didn’t before notice on the end table.]

[Fascinated, he takes a couple snapshots, then leaps in a panicked duck for cover when Skoodge reaches out and picks it up.
[Skoodge takes phat rips off of it.]

[It takes about 5 seconds for Dib to process the awkward disappointment of the entire situation. Spitefully, he makes sure he’s still recording, at least. Side-eyeing the preoccupied Irken, he continues prying around the room and interacting with random objects. Turning a knob on a nearby door reveals the roboparents. They activate.]
Dib: Oh no.
[Chaos ensues]
Zim and Gir have to go off world for a while. Important A-plot business. Eats up quite a few days of Earth time.
Naturally, Dib notices their absence and takes this as the perfect opportunity to make another break-in attempt at Zim’s base. Gets past the gnomes with one of his magazine doohickeys or science gizmos. Stops cold in his tracks after landing in the living room. There’s a heavy, colorful fog lining the ceiling in ghostly wisps. A foul, akrid odor clings to the air.
Sitting on the couch, covered in cheesy crumbs, open bag of space-Doritos beside him, is Invader Skoodge. Dib has never heard of or seen Skoodge. The guy is open mouthed and staring blankly at the Monty Python sequence playing out on the TV screen. He doesn’t seem to notice the new presence until Dib gives a confused “Um….”
The line of drool that was threatening to reach Skoodge’s shirt retreats back into his mouth. He turns slowly and stares hard at the intruder for a second of focusing. “Oh…” He smiles and greets with a “hey guy” and a half-hearted wave, and then he sinks a bit deeper into the sofa with a complacent expression.
“Bloopin” is playing in the background during this whole thing.
Dib threw that.

Invader the zim experiences a lemon