Izzy Is Just A Mess & Lucius Needs A Raise For Dealing With Him. - Tumblr Posts

🪐 — LUCIUS SPRIGGS  for  izzy :

breath gets stuck in his throat halfway out,   while his brain struggles to comprehend that this is something that’s actually happening.  this meaning getting kissed by none other than izzy hands,  which effectively shuts him up for once.  even rarer,  lucius is also keeping utterly still,  not moving a single muscle of his body  —  it’s not the resisting kind of tension,  however,  it’s just the what the hell do i do kind of it.  because izzy is more complicated than most men he has ever kissed  (   he easily takes the first spot at that   ),  as hard to predict as the weather when it gets all shifty and crazy,  and lucius doesn’t know whether he should do something with his hands or not,  if it’s safe to put them anywhere at all on the other man or if he should just keep them off.  he doesn’t risk it,  in the end,  not with how izzy reacted last time he had touched him.  arms stay down his sides,  then,  as lucius allows the pirate access to his mouth. 

the kiss itself is a bit rough,  beard scraping against skin,  yet lucius doesn’t exactly mind it.  well,  it’s a step up from angry snarls and furious retreats,  at the very least, better than seeing izzy stump on what he wants before he can dare let himself have it.   ❛  okay.  wasn’t expecting that,  like at all.  but i didn’t hate it.  ❜   lips even curl up in something that’s half grimace-half smile,  faint and a bit tentative, bordering on shy. which lucius surely isn’t, especially when kissing is involved. so that means he is nervous, of course he is, he has every and one reasons to be: because lucius hasn’t forgotten the man’s scathing words,  he is in fact well aware of how quickly it all could go spectacularly wrong.  and because this might be a step forward in the general direction of progress,  sure, but it hardly could be considered a miracle.  ❛  let me guess. you’re going to tell me to get lost now? ❜ it comes out maybe a little sharper than intended, but not by much.

     HE DOESN’T KNOW HOW TO DO THIS,  how it’s supposed to work.  the only man he’s ever touched, who’s ever touched him, is edward.  &  that had been so different that it scarcely feels fair to compare the two.  after all, they had not kissed, not like this.  &  lucius is stiff, but he also lets his mouth open slightly, actually lets izzy kiss him.  &  the first mate feels himself flush,  a low simmering heat moving across his skin beneath layers  &  layers of black leather.  he wears it laced to the top, not a whisper of skin exposed below his throat.  &  there is a reason for it, the barrier keeping hands away from his flesh intentionally.  izzy does not like to be touched.  less than a fortnight ago, he had threatened to remove the poor boy’s hand for the crime of laying it on him with a semblance of gentleness.  &  yet, as he kisses him, rough but hesitant, izzy finds himself wishing for gentle hands on him, for lucius to want to reach for him  &  actually be able to find his skin when he does.                                 it’s a mad desire, one that leaves his head spinning,  &  he’s almost grateful that lucius breaks away a moment later so that he can catch his breath.  izzy is left panting, eyes dark  &  wide when they flutter open  &  look up at the taller man’s face, shocked to see that he’s almost smiling.  i didn’t hate it,  lucius says,  &  izzy has to choke down a wild laugh, hoping to pass it off for something more akin to a scoff.  but then the next words have izzy flushing even redder.  shame is a familiar emotion, one that he has had seared into his skin both literally  &  figuratively.  he knows its sickening nausea, its trills of fear up his spine.  but this time it’s different, colored with a different shade of guilt.  it’s not the act of kissing lucius that he feels shame for  —  that had felt entirely good, warm in a way he had never experienced before.  what does make him lower his eyes, hands softening their grip on lucius’s shirt to lay flat against his chest instead, is how he had treated him before now.                  &  the thought makes him feel a little ill.  izzy almost steps away to flee, almost shows lucius that he’s right about him.  but he wants more than anything to prove him wrong.  ❝ no.  that’s not —  i want  — ❞   he wants lucius, wants to be greedy  &  ask for both his lips  &  his hands.  yet the words still stick in his throat.  izzy knows that he doesn’t deserve the things he really wants, not after the way he’s behaved.  but he’s had a taste,  &  now he’s greedy for more.  though he still can’t manage to look lucius in the eye while he speaks, his gaze instead glued to his fingertips where they lie resting against the other man’s chest, his voice is steady despite it’s uncharacteristically soft tone.  ❝ i want... to do that again.  i —  i liked it. ❞  &  it still feels strange to admit it aloud, but the next words fall from his lips before he can even consider stopping them.  ❝ &  i want you to put your hands on me, too, this time.  if ... if you wouldn’t mind it, that is. ❞