Joakim Jolly Karlsson Headcannons - Tumblr Posts

Ok, but like who would definitely be like this out everyone in Bad Omens, including the crew as well.

reader who wears a fake engagement ring so men don’t approach you, but character doesn’t notice it. not like it matters, since the two of you get into a semi heated argument at the bar + he suggests, half as a joke, why don’t yall just fuck it out and come to an agreement. you hold up your hand and say “im married!!!” and without a missing a beat, he tells you, “your husband must not love you if that’s the ring he got you.”

turns out, character is as rich as he is annoying (which is to say, very very very very much so) & it’s just your luck that your work forces you to be in close proximity to him. if he sees you lifting anything heavy, he’ll ask you with mock sympathy “does your husband know they have you doing manual labor?” (but even more annoying… he’ll carry the stuff for you 🤭)

and then one day you lose the ring and he notices immediately and you would have thought christmas came early. “trouble in paradise?” he’ll ask you, hoping to hear abt ur divorce.

“getting the ring cleaned.” you lie, and you can smell the disappointment coming off of him. he’ll ask the people close to you “so anyway what does her husband even do?” and one of your slow on the uptake coworkers/friends goes “[name]? she doesn’t have a husband……”

oh. well now character is going to have a blast next time he sees you.